The Thoughts of Pet Bunnies
Most of the animals who lived in Fluttershy’s cottage would claim it was a paradise. After all, the cottage provided a safe place for all kinds of animals to live sheltered from the elements of nature. Food, care, and love were given in abundance by the timid yellow pegasus who took all the animals into her house and yard. With full bellies and happy hearts, who could possibly find anything wrong with such a loving home and gracious host?
A bowl of leafy green vegetables flew through the air and out the window, landing with a dull thud in backyard. The bowl shattered as it hit the ground, sending its contents flying like confetti from the party cannon. The shock of such an event caused the chickens, rodents, woodland birds, and other animals in the area to scatter in blind panic.
Inside the house, a monster was slowly breaking free from its cage.
Angel Bunny took a hesitant step backward as he realized the consequences of his actions a few seconds too late. His eyes widened as he looked back and forth for a place to escape his doom. Unfortunately, the nearest piece of furniture was several bunny hops away, and it would be impossible for him to reach it before the creature reached him. Desperate, he decided to pull some of his most potent escape tactics.
First, he widened his eyes and lowered his body as low to the ground as possible. He looked at the furious creature with the cutest expression he could muster. His bottom puffed out ever so slightly. This was a very tricky part, even for one so experienced in the art of pleading as himself. He had to jut out his lip just enough to evoke sympathy, but if he moved it out too much the falsity would be so obvious a kit could see through it. Just in time, he remembered to have his lips tremble ever so slightly to give added depth to his expression. With all of these features, he managed to complete the first of his secret techniques: the Puppy-Dog Pout.
For a moment, the creature’s expression softened, but before Angel Bunny could celebrate its face returned to its hardened state. The monster narrowed its eyes as it slowly approached him.
Angel Bunny knew he had to tread carefully. He could tell that he had only two chances—or maybe even one—to dissuade the creature’s anger. The rabbit quickly conjured a new course of action as he got down on his knees. His eyes watered pitifully as he looked the creature in the eye, and he even gave a loud sniff for extra effect.
The creature’s eyes narrowed even further. Angel Bunny blinked as he realized his mistake. That sniff was much too loud and not a high enough pitch. Instead of using his sniff of instant pity, he had used his sniff of snubbing. After such a major blunder, he knew his fate was sealed. Still, he couldn’t resist trying his second most desperate card.
He slowly walked to the creature, which was glaring at him with a look that made him want to melt right there on the spot. Angel kept his ears flat to the back of his head, but made sure they retained a certain amount of looseness as he moved so it wouldn’t look forced. He lowered his head slowly as he let the front of his body slump forward. As slowly as possible, he raised his head up again to meet the creature in the eye. The bunny’s face was devoid of any mischievous energy, and his eyes were watery and brimmed with sadness. The creature’s facial expression softened once more, and Angel held his breath as he anxiously awaited the result.
Unlike the previous time, the creature did not go return to its furious state. Instead, it landed delicately on the wooden floor. The anger was gone from its eyes, replaced by mere concern.
Angel had to resist wiping sweat from his brow. He had finally succeeded. The enraged monster was no more, leaving the gentle but wimpy pegasus he knew and loved. He embraced her leg in a hug as he let out a near silent sigh.
To his surprise, Fluttershy pushed him away. “I’m sorry, Angel,” she said softly but firmly. “But I can’t let you off that easily. It wouldn’t be fair to the others.”
Angel Bunny gaped. Not fair? Not Fair! He thought in indignation. What did I do? He quickly made this clear by a variety of gestures and chattering.
Fluttershy lowered herself to the floor so she could look him in the eye. “You stole food from baby Nutters, disturbed Mr. Cardinal from his singing, and you tried to kick the Fuzzywhiskers out of the cottage while I was out!”
Angel Bunny waved his arms in protest as he explained his case.
Fluttershy shook her head. “It doesn’t matter if he wasn’t eating it, it was still wrong to take baby Nutter’s food,” she said sternly. “You also can’t interrupt someone’s singing because you want to nap, that’s why I bought you those earplugs. And you must remember that the Fuzzywhiskers are new to Ponyville, so you need to give them a chance to adapt. You can’t terrorize them just because they don’t understand all of the rules here.”
Angel Bunny gave her a deadpan look.
“It doesn’t matter if they’re rats,” said Fluttershy. “I've only seen them act extremely well behaved.”
Angel Bunny facepawed. They only act well behaved around you because they don’t want to get in trouble, moron!
As Fluttershy’s features settled to a small frown, Angel realized that he had finally crossed the fragile line. “That’s it,” declared Fluttershy with the slightest hint of anger that made the white rabbit’s skin crawl. Angel Bunny tried to make a desperate dash away, but the pony easily managed to scoop him up in her hooves. “I don’t know what’s gotten in to you today, but I can’t have you disturbing the other animals. You’re going to have to…” she paused for dramatic effect. “Take a time out.”
The white rabbit paled as he heard his sentence. B-but, I haven’t been sentenced to a time out since I was little rabbit kit! And that was years ago! I can’t go on time out! I can’t! But no matter how hard he begged, pleaded, or struggled, the pegasus was firm.
“I don’t like this anymore than you do, but I don’t know what to do with you,” Fluttershy admitted as she set him down on the floor of her bedroom. “You’re going to have to stay here for a few hours until I find the creatures you upset and make sure they’re comfortable again. Then I have to go calm down the others outside, who are all probably hiding because of that bowl you sent out the window. Finally, as part of your punishment, you’ll be the last one to get your dinner. Well, except for me.”
Angel’s eyes started to water with real tears as Fluttershy gently started to close the door behind her. “Sorry,” she whispered as she shut the door, hiding her face in her mane so Angel wouldn’t see the tears in her own eyes. Punishing one of her closest friends was very painful for her, but she knew it had to be done. Aside from causing trouble for the animals she had mentioned, he had also scared off some baby mice who had been sleeping in his bed, and gotten into a verbal argument with Harry when the bear had accidentally used Angel’s favorite blanket as a tissue. Angel had also requested a snack from Fluttershy and kicked it from her hooves when she forgot to add the cherry tomato, but the pegasus was more concerned about the animals he had spooked with that stunt than the loss of her hard work.
Angel Bunny stared at the door for several seconds after Fluttershy had closed it. That’s it, I’m officially going to be the laughing stock of the cottage, he thought sullenly as he sank to ground. Every creature knows that only the worst offenders are sentenced to complete isolation. In fact, the last creature who was given such a sentence was a temperamental badger. To think I would share the fate of a lowly badger. A badger! My life is ruined!
Depressed, Angel Bunny curled up in a dark corner of the room. Lonely and miserable, he slowly drifted off to a fitful sleep.
Angel Bunny groaned as his back protested against his current napping spot. He hopped onto Fluttershy’s comfortable bed, and went back to sleep.
Slam!
Angel jumped as the door was nearly thrown off its hinges. In flew Fluttershy, who was shivering in panic. “Angel! Angel, where are you!” she said urgently. Or she might’ve been yelling, it was hard to tell.
Angel hopped off the bed and looked at Fluttershy in confusion and alarm. Before he could get a word in, Fluttershy scooped him up and dashed out of the cottage with a speed Angel had ever witnessed before. When Fluttershy finally put him down, he fell face first into grass as he tried to regain control of his somersaulting stomach.
“Oh, sorry, Angel Bunny,” said Fluttershy sympathetically. “I’ll give you minute.”
“We ain’t got a minute!”
Startled, Angel quickly looked up to the owner of the voice, and nearly lost his lunch in the process. Applebloom! He mentally exclaimed. And Sweetie Belle too! Great, they probably set the entire cottage on fire, again! But where is their feathery, flightless companion? He looked to the left and to the right, and even looked up. But the last member of the Cutie Mark Crusaders was nowhere to be seen.
Taking a deep breath, Angel slowly rose to his full height. Then he tugged on Fluttershy’s mane and asked what was going on.
“It’s really, really bad, Angel,” Fluttershy said nervously. “It’s Scootaloo! She’s has the Alicorn Amulet!”
Really? That’s it? Angel raised an eyebrow. Just ask her to give it back.
“It’s not that simple,” Fluttershy replied. “You see, she’s wearing it.”
She’s not even a unicorn, what’s the worst she could do?
“She kind of captured Zecora and blew up her hut.”
Angel stared at her blankly. You must be joking.
“Fluttershy! Come on! We need to stop Scootaloo before she does something really, really bad!” said Sweetie Belle urgently.
But it doesn’t make any sense! The alicorn amulet shouldn’t even work on a pegasus, right?
“Shouldn’t we get the others?” Fluttershy suggested meekly. “Twilight was the one who saved the day the last time somepony got ahold of the amulet.”
“We ain’t got time for that!” protested Applebloom as she began pushing Fluttershy towards the Everfree Forest. “We need to save our friend, and standin’ ‘round here ain’t doin’ us a lick of good!”
“What she said!” Sweetie piped in as she assisted Applebloom in moving the frightened pegasus.
Angel Bunny tapped his little foot as he tried to make sense of the recent events. So the Alicorn Amulet can work on pegasi and turns fillies into evil maniacs. Well, at least it was only Scootaloo. The little chicken can’t even fly! All Fluttershy has to do is stare her down and talk her out if whatever shenanigans she got herself in. This’ll all be over in half an hour or so!
Smiling contently, Angel Bunny happily hopped along with three ponies through the Everfree. After a surprisingly short trip through the quiet forest, they finally reached Zecora’s hut. Or rather, what was left of it.
“Oh my,” gasped Fluttershy as she looked at the large crater. “How did that happen?”
“I did!” A voice boomed from above them.
Angel’s jaw dropped at the sight he was beholding. This cannot be happening! He thought frantically as he tried to urge his body to move, but remained frozen in place. I must be dreaming!
Flying above them was an alicorn mare who stood as tall as Celestia herself. Her coat was orange, and her mane purple and flowed despite the lack of a breeze. At her neck was an amulet depicted a unicorn's head and a pair of red and grey wings. The rest of the amulet was also grew, except for a diamond-shaped jewel in the center. “I am Nightmare Scoot!” the alicorn declared. “And I am here to destroy the world!”
Angel Bunny gently pushed his jaw back in place. She didn’t really say that, did she? He asked himself. That is simply the dumbest line I have ever heard.
“Uh, Scootaloo,” said Fluttershy timidly. “W-would you m-mind taking off the amulet and c-coming back down? I mean, if that’s okay w-with you.”
“Come down?” the alicorn asked with a sneer. “I’m much too evil for that!”
Angel Bunny facepawed. I take that back. That was the dumbest line I have ever heard.
“Hey, Scoots!” Applebloom called out. “We don’t want to fight you, so could ya please come on down?”
The alicorn opened her mouth to reply, but Sweetie Belle cut in by adding, “We’re going to the Sugar Cube Corner afterwards for ice cream!”
Nightmare Scoot considered this for a moment, shrugged, and landed on the ground. She tossed away the alicorn amulet and immediately returned to her normal filly state in a dramatic flash of light. “Let’s go!” she declared.
“Cutie Mark Crusaders Ice Cream Eaters! Yay!” the three fillies cheered.
Fluttershy sighed contently as she watched the three fillies gallop away happily. “It seems that everything worked out just fine,” she said with a small smile. “Don’t you agree, Angel Bunny?”
The bunny simply stood there, shocked into silence by the events that had just transcribed. Please tell me this was all a crazy dream! He mentally begged. Because that didn’t make any sense! If this is reality, I’d prefer to be locked up in a padded room with Pinkie and that monstrous freak Discord!
“Did somebunny call me name?”
Angel Bunny woke up with a start. He glanced around frantically, and let out a sigh of relief when he realized he was safely back in Fluttershy’s cottage. Looks like it was all just a dream, he thought in relief. No wonder it was so crazy. Hopefully I don’t have to go through anything like that ever again.
The door burst open as Fluttershy flew into the room with her eyes wide with panic. “Angel! Angel, where are you?” she said urgently.
The second Flutershy spotted him on the bed she scooped him up in her hooves. Angel Bunny began to be filled with dread as he felt the creeping sensation of déjà vu. No! Don’t take me! I don’t care if Scootaloo stole the Alicorn Amulet and is trying to take over the world! Just sic the other two crazy fillies on her! I don’t need to get involved! Just leave me here to wait for the madness to end!
“What are you talking about?” Fluttershy asked in confusion as she looked down at the shivering bunny in her hooves. “Did you have a nightmare? I heard you scream.”
That caused Angel Bunny to pause. It was a dream… just a dream… A smile grew on his face. Yes! No random adventures! No senseless alicorn transformations! No evil draconequi! He broke free from Fluttershy’s grasp and began to dance a little jig.
“Um… yay?” Fluttershy said hesitantly. She started at her pet in confusion for a few moments before she finally remembered that she had something to tell him. “Angel, I need you to apologize to the other animals you upset.”
Angel suddenly froze in midstep. He lost his balance and ended up falling face first on the floor. Unfortunately for him, when he looked up, he saw the same yellow pegasus looking down at him with concern. “Angel, are you okay?” she asked worriedly. “You’ve been acting rather strange lately.”
I feel like I’m going from one Nightmare to the next! Angel angrily hopped in frustration. First I get locked away in solitude for simple misunderstandings that had me in the right! Then I had a ridiculously crazy dream that made absolutely no sense and was invaded by a freak of nature! Now you expect me to apologize to those annoying pests! No way! I’m not doing it! He crossed his arms and turned up his nose.
“Angel Bunny! You shouldn’t say such things!” Fluttershy scolded him. “Don’t you realize how much trouble you’ve caused?”
Angel Bunny wanted to continue his angry tirade, but a quick glance at Fluttershy’s face warned him that he was treading on thin ice. Instead, he shrank back his ears in preparation for the Puppy-Dog Pout.
“That isn’t going to work this time, mister,” Fluttershy said sternly as she callously watched the changes in her pet bunny’s expression. “You’re going to apologize to the other animals. Now.”
But they’re pests! Angel protested as he tapped his foot rapidly in annoyance. They fail to understand that I am the alpha male, and that I deserve respect! I don’t want to put up with them! They don’t deserve it!
“Angel…”
Angel’s ears flattened instinctively as his owner’s eyes began to water. No! Please! Anything but that! He begged as he waved his arms frantically.
However, his efforts were in vain. The pegasus slowly lowered herself to the floor to the floor as tears began to fall from her eyes. “I just… don’t understand,” she said between sniffles. “Why are you being… so mean today? Did I do a bad job… raising you?”
Angel visibly winced as Fluttershy began softly crying. She was crying so softly that the other animals wouldn’t be able to hear her, but that didn’t offer Angel any comfort. He clutched his paws to his head as he tried to think of a way to cheer her up. Think, Angel. Think! What would cheer her up? What would make her smile? What would get her to stop crying? It would need to be pretty, and be sure to brighten up her day. His face lit up as inspiration struck him. He clambered onto a dresser jumped out of an open bedroom window. A few seconds later, he crawled back in with a garland made from garden flowers.
Of course, Fluttershy was still quietly sobbing, but he steeled himself up against the tears. Come on! Take it! He pleaded with her as he held the garland in front of her. I made it for you!
Fluttershy gave one last sniff before opening her eyes to see the garland. Then she looked up to the concerned face of the rabbit who made it. “Thank you,” she whispered. “It looks pretty.”
Angel raised one end of the garland and placed it around Fluttershy’s neck. There, now don’t you feel better?
“I think so,” Fluttershy replied uncertainly, as she used a hoof to wipe another tear from her eye. “But, um… why?”
Angel cocked his head. Why what? The garland? I made it because I didn’t want to see you cry. I’m not heartless you know.
“I know you have a big heart Angel.” Fluttershy looked down at the garland. It was made from the violets and daisies she grew outside, as well as some delicious dandelions. “It is pretty, but that’s not exactly what I meant,” she replied softly. “I want to know why you’ve been upsetting the other animals. It’s not like you to act like this.”
Angel scuffed the ground in embarrassment. Uh… yeah… he thought with a grimace as he recalled the various actions he had taken against his fellow animals. If only you knew…
“Angel.” The bunny turned his attention back to Fluttershy. “I still want to know,” the pegaus insisted delicately.
Angel sighed. Aside from his usual temperament, there had been a reason for his grumpiness throughout the day. But you probably don’t want to know. Just take my word for it.
“Angel…”
The bunny’s eyes widened as Fluttershy’s eyes narrowed ever so slightly. Her voice only stern, not angry, but that was more than Angel could take right now. I woke up in a grumpy mood this morning and took out my frustration on the other animals please don’t get mad or kick me out of the house!
Fluttershy’s eyes did not lose their edge—regardless of how dull said edge was. “You were bullying all the other animals simply because you were having a bad day?” she reiterated.
I’ll apologize! Just don’t be mad! Please! He fell to his knees as he searched Fluttershy’s eyes for a glimmer of pity.
The two stared off for several seconds before Fluttershy finally turned her head away to think. “Well,” she said thoughtfully after a few moments of silence. “As long as you apologize…”
Angel didn’t waste any time in tugging on Fluttershy’s pink mane as he quickly hopped back to the living room.
The rest of the day passed smoothly for Angel Bunny. Sure, baby Nutters had chunked an acorn at him and the mother of the mice pups had nearly ripped him in half, but at least Fluttershy wasn’t mad at him. That was the most important thing of all. Smiling with content, he snuggled under his favorite blanket as he drifted off to sleep.
Angel was awoken by soft poke on his side. He yawned and stretched as he absentmindedly shook off dust bunnies from his tail.
“Um, Angel?” Angel paused from his dusting to face the concerned yellow pegasus who was looking down at him. “You didn’t really need to punish yourself by sleeping in the corner. All I wanted was for you to have an hour or two to cool off before you apologized to the others. Angel?” she asked with concern when the rabbit suddenly fainted. “Oh my, was it something I said?”
Author's Note
Well... what's the point of writing if you don't expand your horizons? I'm actually not sure if I'm pleased with my attempt to make a comedic slice of life story, so looks like I'll have to wait for you guys to comment.
Special thanks to Odd Shot for suggesting Angel Bunny as the pet of the story!
Like it? Hate it? Just remember, comments are food for a writer's soul!
