In his cottage in Chaosville, Discord was humming merrily while vacuuming the…ceiling. He was wearing his usual cleaning attire: a red handkerchief with yellow polka dots on his head, a cream-colored shirt underneath a blue-green apron with one orange patch and a yellow patch, blue rubber gloves, and purple slippers with crumpled socks. He thought he’d spend the day catching up on his “cleaning”.
YAAAAAGGGHH!!!
Discord heard the familiar scream and face-palmed while he grumbled, “Oh, not him again.” Parcel Post was flailing about in the otherworldly dimension, having no gravity to keep him on the ground- whatever ground was there. Suddenly, he was caught in a giant butterfly net and looked up at his rescuer, who was wearing square glasses, a white shirt with a red tie, and brown pants. Discord smiled, “My, this is certainly the biggest catch I’ve made today!”
Parcel Post shakily pulled out a letter from his bag and stammered, “M-m-m-m-m-Mr. Discord? Urgent letter from Princess Celestia.” Discord didn’t like the sound of that when he telekinetically retrieved the letter. “Urgent, huh?” he said. “That’s almost never good.” The envelope opened by itself and when Discord read the letter, he was in instant shock.
The mail pony asked, “Is there something wrong?” Discord immediately let go of the butterfly net and conjured up traveling attire as he rapidly said, “No time to talk! Princess Celestia needs to see me at once!” He teleported out of Chaosville just as Parcel Post began floating in midair again. The creature that had grabbed him before did so again.
“NOT AGAAAAIIINN!!!”
******
Discord slammed open the doors to the throne room and instantly cried, “Whatever it was, I didn’t do it!” He made an expression of surprise when he saw the royal sisters, the Mane Six, and Spike all staring at him. He waved his paw and nervously uttered, “Hi.” Fluttershy flew up to him and asked in a worried voice, “Discord, what’s going on out there?” He asked, “What?” Rainbow Dash scowled, “I think you know what!” She turned and pointed to her tail, which was now a rainbow was connected to a cloud on one end and her rear on the other.
Discord chuckled, “Oh, that’s too funny!” Luna scowled, “We fail to see how this is funny.” Spike nodded, “Yeah! That’s nothing compared to what’s going on outside!” Discord stood in confusion and asked, “Outside?” Celestia rose from her throne and said, “Follow us.”
When they got to the bridge between towers, Discord was shocked by what he saw outside. Trees were uprooted and floating upside-down, the grass was now a darker color, the water near Canterlot seemed to be reversing the water cycle – with large droplets now rising to the sky – and the most disturbing thing of all was that the sun was changing colors! Discord said, “Whoa. I did not do this. I mean, if it was up to me, the trees would be growing pickled fruit, the grass would be feathers, and…” He stopped as soon as he looked at the gang, who were glaring at him. He then realized that his suggestions were making him look guilty.
He differed, “But it’s not me! I didn’t do this!” Spike peered out from the bridge and his eyes shrunk. He pointed while saying in a scared tone, “Like…that?” The others looked in the direction Spike was facing and were shocked to see an impossibly high tsunami headed for them. While the others shrieked, Discord snapped his fingers and teleported them to the throne room…barely. He pointed out, “Okay, I definitely didn’t do that.”
Celestia said, “It seems we have a mystery on our hands. Someone, or something, is disrupting the natural order of things.” Rainbow suggested, “Wanna bet it’s another draconequus causing more trouble than Discord does?” Discord humphed, “I resent that remark.” Luna said, “I think our problem lies not with another creature, but in the stars themselves. I can feel that something has disturbed the universe. I do not know what, but our best option is to search all of the places where different kinds of magic originate.”
Discord beamed, “You mean ‘hotspots’?” He chuckled and continued, “Well, you’re in luck, because I happen to know them all, north to south and east to west.” Twilight looked at the Royal Sisters and exchanged smirks with them. She turned to Discord and declared, “Congratulations, Discord. You’ve just become our new search scout!” Discord smiled, “Well, thank you. I…”
He soon realized what she just said and asked, “What?!” Twilight explained, “Discord, you may be the only one who knows where the hotspots are. If someone is tampering with any one of them, you have to alert us of it.” Celestia asked, “Do you understand what we’re asking of you?” Discord looked at the gang for a few moments, and then straightened and said, “Princesses, you can count on me.”
Discord was packing his travel bag when he heard knocking on the door. That’s strange, he thought. No pony’s knocked on my door before. He opened the front door and saw nothing. “Hello?” he asked. “Any pony out there?”
“We’re right here, Discord!”
He turned to see Twilight hanging to the doorknob to keep from drifting away and the rest of the Mane Six held tightly on to each other’s legs for the same reason. The sight of a pony chain almost cracked Discord up, but he merely smiled, “Hold on.” He grabbed Twilight’s front leg and pulled her and the others inside within a second before he closed the door. When they recovered, Rainbow Dash said, “I’d never thought I’d say this, but…” She then embraced the carpet and continued, “Ground! Sweet, sweet ground!”
Discord tried hard not to chuckle out loud, but a small snicker or two escaped his lips. Rainbow Dash glared up at him and retorted, “Hey, no pony can fly with zero gravity here!” When the Mane Six stood up, Twilight asked, “So are you ready for your quest?” In a flash, Discord was in his general attire and saluted while saying, “Ready, willing, and able, Princess.” As soon as he disposed of the clothes, Fluttershy walked up to him with a small basket. She said, “Here, I made these for you for your trip.”
He took the basket and said, “Thank you, my dear. It’s nice to know somepony cares about my well-being and nourishment.” He then whispered to her, “Oh, do take care of Q for me while I’m gone.” In another white flash, a fishbowl appeared in his paw and it had a clownfish swimming in it. Fluttershy took the fishbowl and cooed at the fish, “Hello, Quincy. You’re a cute little fish, aren’t you?”
Q swam to the side of the bowl closet to Fluttershy and pressed its lips against the glass. Discord said, “Isn’t that sweet? It means he likes you already.” Fluttershy blushed and chuckled before she asked, “Q, do you want to say ‘good-bye’ to your papa before he has to go?” Discord placed both hands on the bowl and said to his fish, “Listen, Q. I need you to be on your best behavior for dear, sweet Fluttershy. She’s an excellent caretaker of animals and she’ll know what’s… *sniff* best for you.”
Discord blinked back tears and handed Q back to Fluttershy while saying, “Oh, I hate these long good-byes. Please take him before I start crying.” When the Pegasus held the fishbowl again, Discord turned his back towards the ponies as he put his arm against his face and sniffled a few more times. It only took a few seconds before Discord turned to face them again with the same cheery face as if he wasn’t near tears just moments before. He flashed on traveling clothes and said, “Well, I must be on my way.” He conjured up his bag and a magnifying glass as he continued, “I’m sure I’ll get to the bottom of this mystery in no time.”
He opened the front door and he waved to the Mane Six, “Allez-vous! Until we meet again!” He then shot out of the door like a rocket and by the time the ponies went to look out, he was out of sight. After a few moments in silence, Rarity wondered, “I hope we can get back to Ponyville in an easier way.”
Author's Note
To those of you who have not read "Discord and the Ponyville Players Dramarama", Quincy (or "Q", as his owner likes to call him) is Discord's pet clownfish.
What would’ve taken a pony days to travel all across Equestria, let alone the whole world, only took hours for Discord. He checked every hotspot he knew, but saw no traces of sabotage to any of them. He then considered looking in other places he didn’t think to look. This took him longer than he thought and he was soon running out of energy. After all, he had to dodge several flying objects and maneuver through tons of sticky grass and spiky stones.
As soon as he reached an open area with a large rock, he was tired, weary, and his stomach rumbled. He knew that now would be a perfect time to chow down some of the grub Fluttershy made for him. He sat down on the bare patch of soil next to the boulder and checked the rock to make sure it wasn’t anything out of the ordinary. When it seemed normal – at least by pony standards - to him, he decided to have a little fun and snapped his fingers to transform the rock into a pillow. There, he thought as he smiled and lied back onto the cushion. Perfect.
He took out Fluttershy’s basket and opened it to see what she had prepared for him. He smiled and remarked, “Ah, that sweet thing. She always knows exactly what I like.” He pulled out a BLT sandwich – “BLT” for banana, licorice, and toffee. He lavishly savored each bite as a way to regain his strength.
When all there was left was the crust, Discord saw something fly out of the corner of his eye. He looked to see a flock of birds settling down in front of him. They all looked like normal pigeons…until he noticed that something was odd about them. At least, they kind of looked odd in the changing color of sunlight, which Discord silently cursed at. When the sunlight changed its color to yellow, Discord saw that the birds were now sporting antlers! He pointed his claw at them and accused, “Hey, you’re stealing my looks!”
The birds all seemed entranced by the crust Discord was now holding, so he threw bits and pieces at them for the hay of it. After about a minute or two of this, he smirked as he thought of throwing a piece of crust out of the birds’ range to see if they could find it. He said as he waved the crumb to get their attention, “Want this? Then go get it!” He tossed it to the left and suddenly, it vanished into thin air!
Discord was surprised by this, so he threw another crumb in that direction and it too disappeared. “How strange,” he wondered curiously. He set down what was left of the crust and turned his attention towards whatever was going on. He pointed a finger through the air and it felt like getting sucked…somewhere. It was familiar like…
He wiggled his now-invisible finger and a tiny wormhole opened as it retracted from the finger. “A wormhole!” he exclaimed. He used both of his hands and further opened the wormhole until he could peer into it. He was surprised by what he found. Many flying objects were zipping over a strange orange city skyline. Well, it looked orange in the yellow light.
Discord remarked as he gazed through the wormhole, “I think I’ve found the cause of the odd happenings.” He smirked as he chuckled, “Well, I guess no pony will be blaming me now.” Just then, he saw something zip across the roofs. It looked like some strange creature that was being chased by a black silhouette. He sensed a bad vibe from the second being and said, “And I think I’ve just found the culprit.” He took his bag and basket and slipped through the wormhole.
A warrior clad in mostly black had been stalking a wizard for days. He had assumed many forms just to follow his quarry. Nobody knew, thankfully, that he was truly the demonic overlord Aku. An incident some time ago had left him without many of his powers. Fortunately, he still had his super strength, self-sustenance, telekinesis, pyrokinesis, laser eyebeams, and shapeshifting. However, he could not grow above the height of a human, so this made him conscious about his public image. As a result, he announced that he was taking a vacation, but didn’t say where.
Since then, Aku remained in the shadows, assuming one diminutive form after another. His only clue of the mystery thief who stripped him of his magic was green smoke. He decided to track down every being, be it human or alien, who was gifted in the supernatural arts. Some were easy to catch and others harder to even follow. But all the witches, wizards, warlocks, and sorcerers he had managed to seize told him nothing about a green cloud that could steal magic. Nevertheless, Aku never stopped searching for answers.
There he was, tracking down another alien wizard who might give him an explanation. When the wizard knew he was being stalked, he ran for his life. Aku gave chase all throughout the red city and almost never tired from the hunt. Several minutes into the chase, Aku saw an opportunity to catch the wizard by leaping from a rise and onto him. They tumbled on the ground and stood up to face each other. Aku fixed his eyes on his quarry and calculated the best way to tackle him…
“Look out below!”
Aku was soon met by the tail and legs of a mysterious creature and pushed to the ground by the force of the impact. He found himself struggling against an unknown beast in police attire and sunglasses. Aku grunted, “What is this?!”
“It’s called a tackle.”
“Who are you?”
The creature gave a smirk and replied, “I’m from out of town, buddy.”
Aku saw offense in this and shouted, “Buddy?!”
He freed his right arm and landed his fist squarely in the long jaw of the creature detaining him. The hat and sunglasses of the animal flew off as he fell to the ground. The warrior-disguised demon rose up to look at the peculiar being. The newcomer was certainly not from around here, let alone the entire universe. He was a mix of many animals and Aku felt that he could not describe what kind of creature this being was.
Discord felt dizzy from the blow, and after he recovered, he discovered his snaggletooth was missing. He snipped at the warrior looking at him, “Well, that was rude. Although, I admit, you did make a really clean uppercut.” By the time he had finished his sentence, he found his snaggletooth and reattached it to his upper lip.
He rose up to face the “man in black” and the latter said, “Well, now thanks to you, I have lost a potentially vital source of information!” Discord looked around, but saw that the creature the warrior was chasing had vanished. He asked, “You mean that helpless denizen you were after? I fail to see how you would make friends that way.” The “man” glared and explained, “I do not intend to make friends! I was only tracking him down for information!”
Discord raised his eyebrow in suspicion and asked, “And what, pray tell, would that information be?” The warrior growled, “It is none of your business!” He pushed Discord aside and grouchily went along his way. Discord rubbed his chest and thought, Hmph! How rude! Well, I guess I’ll have to follow him.
Author's Note
Aku is in his warrior form in this chapter. It can be seen in the Samurai Jack episode "Jack vs. Aku".
