An Unlikely Pairing

by RainEStar

Rating: everyone
Tags: Slice of Life, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, Tank, Romance, Opalescence, Comedy, Gummy
Length: 2706

When the Mane 6 are having a picnic, Gummy's thoughts venture to the other pets around him. And one manages to catch his eye...

When the Mane 6 are having a picnic, Gummy's thoughts venture to the other pets around him. And one manages to catch his eye... but will Gummy be able to confess his love to the creature of his new-found dreams?

Published 2015-08-06 05:30:02 UTC
Last updated 2015-08-06 05:30:02 UTC

The Picnic

It was beautiful day in Ponyville. The sun was shining high overhead, and the sky was mostly clear, aside from the occasional cloud. The temperature was warm, but not too oppressively hot since it was still springtime. A light breeze whistled through the air, spreading the sweet scent of flowers through the air.

With the weather being so perfect, few ponies could resist taking a break from their duties to spend an afternoon outside. Among them included the six most important ponies in Ponyville, also known as the Elements of Harmony, who were enjoying a picnic outside with the company of their pets.

While the ponies talked about their family, life, jobs, and whatever else mares talked about during picnics, the pets were having their own, separate and unrelated, conversations.

“So then I kicked down both bags of birdseeds onto her head, and she said was, ‘Thank you, Angel Bunny. You’re so sweet!’ I mean really, how long will it take before she takes the hint that she needs to be more assertive?”

“I think she’s made great progress,” Owlicious responded. “Besides, if you wanted to help her, couldn’t you simply tell her instead of giving cues that she’s too good-natured to understand?”

The white rabbit shrugged. “I’m hoping that she’ll take the hint eventually,” he replied. “Besides, this way is much more fun! I have the entire run of the cottage!”

“Running!” Winona barked excitedly. “I love running! Let’s go running!”

Angel screeched in panic as the over-enthusiastic dog bounded towards him in a game of chase. The other pets watched in amusement the rabbit was forced to scurry up a tree to avoid being run over by Winona. Well, all except one of the pets.

Gummy, as usual, was reflecting on his current circumstances. Is that all we are in life? Terrified rabbits being chased by jaws that strike terror in our hearts? he wondered. Is the purpose of our existence to simply remain one step of disaster? One skip ahead of our doom? Can we expect anything more? Should we expect anything more?

Gummy was so lost in his thoughts that he didn’t notice someone had plodded up beside him until a familiarly slow voice rumbled in his ear. “You waste your time pondering on the future,” his fellow reptile said. The words dripped out of his mouth so slowly that Gummy wondered if it was possible for him to communicate with his adrenaline-junkie owner. “You should think about the here and now.”

Gummy didn’t even bother asking how Tank had known what he was thinking about. The tortoise was very wise and very old. Gummy had only recently turned two years old, while Tank had already lived through his first couple of decades. The tortoise somehow knew everything about everything. He was even wiser than Owliucious, even though owls were known to be the wisest of all creatures.

Taking Tank’s advice to heart, Gummy tried to spy something interesting he could set his mind to. While theoretically he could find a mountain of philosophy in the tiniest blade of grass, he found it more entertaining to dissect the most complicated and intriguing subject he could find. The weather is managed by pegasi, but its patterns are fleeting and today’s weather is too average to be worth philosophizing. he thought with disappointment. The fresh greenness of the grass is an ever constant, and I watched grass grow last week. He shook his head ruefully. Such a waste of a beautiful Saturday morning. I should have watched paint dry. Flowers? No… their roots to the present are weak at best. After all, one simple yank from enthusiastic filly can displace a flower from the patch of dirt it has known its entire life, and relocate it to a completely new environment; only for it to slowly wither away, adored in its inevitable oblivion.

Next, he turned his eyes to the ponies. While they do provide interesting material, I study them almost daily in their interactions with Pinkie, he mentally commented. No… I needed something new to ponder! I cannot let the wheel of time force me contemplate redundant thoughts!

Finally, he looked at his fellow pets. Owlicious and Tank are interesting characters, but they are better suited as members of a conversation. It would be almost rude to dissect every fiber of their existence in an inner monologue, so I’ll save them as last resorts. Angel and Winona are dreadfully annoying in their own ways. Angel seems to take the most difficult and aggressive approach to solving problems, and Winona has less intelligence than Pinkie’s tail! I would only be torturing myself if I let my thought linger on them for two long. That only leaves…

Gummy’s normally rigid jaw fell open at the sight before him. Such beauty cannot be brought into words either verbally or mentally! She is the object of absolute perfection! See how the rays of glorious sunlight frame her immaculate fur coat! Her pose, so regal and graceful, is akin to that of a queen!

Gummy blinked. What is this strange and powerful feeling stirring within me? he wondered. My heart is beating very rapidly, but I have not done any amounts of heavy physical exercise. I can feel my face burning hotter than the sun that looms overhead. My knees, they wobble ever so unsteadily, as if they load they carry has doubled in size. My breath comes short… but why? How? What kind of magic is this that has overtaken me?

Tank smiled knowingly as he watched the expression on the gator’s normally emotionless face. “You’re finally growing up,” the old reptile said knowingly. “You’ve already made your first crush.”

Crush implies the usage of force for destructive purposes, Gummy thought in confusion. But I am not being destroyed. Rather, I feel lighter than ever. I’m so light I believe I could fly. I may even be able to touch the sky. Hmm… that contrasts the feeling of my buckling knees. What kind of destructive power is this?

“That’s not quite what I mean,” said Tank with a low and slow chuckle. “When you have a crush, you’ve had your first stroke of romantic love.”

Love? That is a concept that stretches many different ways. There is familial love, as would one love a hatchling, parent, or sibling. There is the love that is of close friendship, like the one the six ponies who own us share. There is also romantic love, which… Gummy blinked. Hmm… that is a tricky one. I can see the Cakes express their love ever second they’re together, but the words to describe their attraction escape me.

“You know,” Tank continued. “I was in love once.”

Gummy shifted the focus of his eyes to the old tortoise beside him. You are the emotional rock of the six of us. I find it hard for you to imagine feeling so—

“Ah, yes. Once I felt so young, free, and alive,” said Tank. A content smile spread across his wrinkled lips. “She was a beauty she was. Her name was Sandy, as I recall.” The old tortoise let out a sigh. “I would bore you with the details, but I think you can understand where I’m coming from.”

Your angle of perception is that of an old tortoise recalling a creature who’s beauty is, or at least was, beyond compare in your eyes. Time has obviously not affected your emotions towards said creature, as indicated by the expression on your face, Gummy mused. It appears that in your youth, you had similar thoughts and feelings as I have now. But I must know, how did you manage? I feel happy, yet at the same time, I feel a deep sense of longing and emptiness. My emotions and feelings are conflicted, but I cannot determine which are wrong.

The tortoise chuckled. “Love is like that,” he said. “Now comes the hard part.”

Hard part? Gummy mentally echoed. Which part is supposed to be hard? Is it hard to suppress the excited, enlightening feeling that makes me want to soar with eagles? Is it hard for me to finally surrender my doubts and take a blind leap of faith? Is it hard—

“Don’t get too philosophical on me,” said Tank. “The hard part, is talking to her.”

Gummy blinked.

“What? Did you expect something different?

Talk…

“You can’t exactly woo her by staring.”

To…

“You need to unleash your inner gator! Take your stand and sweep her of her paws!”

Her…

“Are you okay there, Gummy? You usually don’t fall on your side like that.

I can’t talk to her, I’d make a fool out of myself.

“Don’t tell me you’re psyching yourself out.”

Not even my thoughts would make sense to her. She would think I’m a freak of nature.

“If it helps, I hid in my shell when someone suggested the idea to me.”

How would I even speak? My deformity prevents me from communicating clearly with other creatures. I can’t even remember what my own voice sounds like!

“There’s no reason to be scared, the worst she could say she isn’t interested.”

Gummy’s eyes glazed over as he turned onto his back. She could never be interested in a poor, toothless gator like me, he thought forlornly. I’m a laughing stock among my own kind, and yet I am still feared among others whenever I open my mouth. How could I speak words to woo her, when even my toothless gums would send her running in terror? No, I’m destined to be lonely forever. I’ll live as an outcast among reptiles and mammals, birds and bees—YEOWCH!

Gummy flipped back onto his legs with unprecedented speed. Tank slowly lowered his foot back to the ground. “There, now don’t you have better things to do than to mope around?”

Gummy stared back at him.

The old tortoise slowly turned around to face the sun that was slowly lowering the sky. “Soon it will be evening,” he said. “When it comes, the mares will take us back to the safety of our homes. If you do not seize the moment, you will only live in regret.” Tank sighed. “As I do even to this day.”

Gummy blinked.

“Well, what are you waiting for?” Tank asked as he slowly swivled his head to face the young gator. “Go, confront your first crush. Relish your first experience with love. Don’t wait till you’re my age!”

Gummy watched the sun lower in the distance. What should I do? He wondered. Should I follow the feelings of my heart and advice of my elder? Do I have the amount of determination and courage required to perform such a feat? If I try, will she reject my advances? But if I don’t, will I end up like Tank? There are too many variables, but no discernable conclusion. What should I do?

He looked at the creature of his dreams once again. How her fur glows in the fading afternoon rays, he thought dreamily. If only she knew of her perfection... Eureka!

Gummy slowly padded forward, thoughts buzzing in his mind like flies in a swamp. Females adore flattery, so what better way to woo her than to use the most illustrative flattery possible? I already know she adores the finer things of life. Maybe we could go out to dinner at a Prench restaurant in Canterlot? Perhaps we could spend our days listening to the composures of Beethooven? I’ve heard that Neigh York salmon are prized by griffons.

Finally, Gummy stopped in front of Opal. The fluffy white cat had been grooming herself, but had stopped to look at Gummy when he had approached. Opalesensce, I am obligated to tell you that your beauty dims even Celestia’s sun above. Only—oh no! Gummy finally realized something extremely crucial. She can’t understand my silent method of communication! I neglected to remember that I need to communicate with her verbally!

Gummy’s mouth suddenly went dry as he stared into the feline’s green eyes. I must move my mouth, he urged himself. I must, communicate, verbally!

Slowly, he opened his mouth. Good, she didn’t run at the sight of my gaping, toothless mouth. It is time for phase two!

Gummy cleared his throat. Phase two complete. Onto phase three!

“Hello.” Gummy winced. Oh no, that was much too high pitched! Gummy thought with panic. That wasn’t a greeting, that was a squeal! And that enunciation was appalling! Such a butchery of the Equestrian language and Ponyville dialect! One would think I was raised on rock farm in the middle of the Badlands! Oh no, she’s smiling! She must be having a humorous inner monologue at my expense! I must rectify this!

“Hello, Opalescence,” Gummy tried again. Better, much better, he thought with relief. But wait, she’s smirking! Oh no, it appears that I have yet to fully recover from my initial mistake. Think, Gummy! What should I do?

He mentally facepalmed. Of course! He thought in realization. If casual conversation does not appeal to her, than I will need to use every fiber of body to engulf her in an endless void of poetic flattery! It’s time she met the real Gummy!

Gummy took a deep breath. “Opalescence,” he began once again. His voice was squeaky from lack of use, and his lack of teeth made it hard to form words correctly, but he tried his best regardless. “Your beauty is beyond the limits of comprehendible imagination. The late afternoon sun accentuates your pure white coat in ways that would make snowflakes jealous. Your eyes draw me to you like a moth to the gentle flame of candle. Your whiskers are so fine that they make silk seem as crude as dirty old rags. My heart overflows with a torrent of motions even now as I tell you these things. I cannot imagine a more beautiful future than one that has you in it.”
Opalesence continued to look him in the eyes, the smile creeping to the corners of her mouth.

This, however, only caused Gummy to panic, thinking that she found him amusing instead of romantic. “If only I could write a thousand books on the wonders of our beauty, nay, ten thousand! Alas, no library in the world could ever hold the wealth of feelings that burst inside me every time I look at you. Even as you lie here, you give the impression of highest royalty! I know of none who can lay their eyes open you without feeling cheer rise into their hearts! Not even Celestia’s glorious sunset can match your glorious splendor! If only I could hope to be able to spend a fraction of my days in your presence!”

To Gummy’s disappointment, the smile on Opal’s face only grew to a full-fledged grin. Gummy let his eyes droop to the grounds as he said his finally words. “However, if you do not share similar affections for me, I understand. Life is never perfect, though you forever will be, in my eyes.” Gummy turned around slowly; his body was as low to the ground as possible as the weight on his chest threatened to crush his fragile heart.

To his surprise, he felt an added weight on his tail before he could pad away. He turned around to see Opalesence had laid a paw on it to stop him from leaving. His eyes filled with hope as the feline opened her mouth.

“I like the classy ones,” Opal said with a purr.

Tank and Owlicious shared a knowing smile as Gummy fell on his side with hearts bursting from his eyes.

Author's Note

I dunno what to think of this. On one hand, its my first attempt of writing romantic fluff. Actually, my first attempt to write any time of romance, period. On the other hand, I feel like I shirked some of Gummy's limited character in the story. Ugh... someone please tell me what needs to be fixed besides the bland cover art...

Thanks Li-ten for suggesting a Gummy Shipping!

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