Luna Scores an Ace
By: WhatTheFap
"Hello everypony. My name is Ace Hardware, and I am an alcoholic." The well-known tennis star began. "About 4 years
ago, after a tennis game, I decided to walk down to the store to get something to eat. As I passed by an alleyway, a young
colt who was dressed like a pirate gave me some unclear white liquid he called vodka. I accepted, consuming my first taste
of alcohol. After that, I would do anything I could to get my hands on some vodka. I would get the vodka from my own dick,
girls' pussies, and occasionally other dudes dicks. I was truly addicted to vodka. It was a nightmare; I would wake up at
night, go into the bathroom, and look at all the hardened vodka all over my face. Sometimes, dudes would break into my
house and shove their cocks into my mouth, and I would just let it happen because in the end, I would get vodka. So I have
come here today to ask for the help and support of you fellow alcoholics, and get me clean and drug-free."
Silence. Not a peep was heard from anypony. They exchanged glances with their mouths agape. Doctor Whooves stood up.
"Uhh... What do you mean by...? Vodka?" the Doctor said.
"I'm talking about the white liquid stuff that comes out of a pony's dick!" Ace yelled. "What the hell else would I be talking about?"
Everypony in the room burst into uncontrollable laughter. A bead of unwanted sweat made its way down Ace's temple.
"OH MAH GOD YOU'RE SO RETARDED, YOU'RE ADDICTED TO CUM!" shouted Lyra.
Ace could only blush in embarrassment.
"Let's give this 'vodka addict' a little sample, eh?"
And so, all 27 of the other stallions (yep, Lyra is a dude) in the room stood up, and gangbanged the fuck out of Ace for
hours on end. Penises were going in his eyes, ears, mouth, nostrils, armpits, penis, etc. You name it, and there was a dick
plugging it up. 20 minutes later, every stallion came simultaneously, shooting gallons of cum all over Ace.
After that whole ordeal, Ace who was covered in "Vodka". It was in his eyes, his nose, his butt, and it dripped off of him
with every step. Ace walked down the street contemplating suicide because of how gaytarded he really is.
"Greetings! What hath happened to you?" A mysterious voice said from an alleyway.
"Wha? Who's there?" Ace questioned, confused. "Show yourself!"
The pony, whom the mysterious voice belonged to, stepped out of the shadows. It was a mare, with a navy blue
colored coat, a see-through flowing blue mane, and deep green eyes. She was larger than he was, and had enormous
wings too. A unicorn horn illuminated her face and body, and Ace saw that her cutie mark was a black splotch with a
crescent moon. Holy fucking niggerdick tits batman, it was Princess Motherfucking Luna.
She stood tall before Ace, staring coldly into him.
"Well? Come forth and speak of which that has happened to thou!" she commanded.
"Well... Uhm. I was.... Uh. At this meeting, right? And these guys there, they uh.... Well. They laughed at my story and raped
me!! It was so embarrassing..." he explained.
"Hah! Thou's story entertains us! Please, come with us and we shall clean the male penile excrament off of thou!"
"Uh... No thanks? I'll just go home, take a shower and then kill myself."
"Nay, we insist!" Luna yelled as she grabbed Ace and pulled him into the alleyway.
"Hey! What's the big idea, bro?" Ace said, a little annoyed.
"THIS!"
Luna's horn lit up in frenzy, and surrounded her and Ace in a luminous bubble of magic. He felt a little queasy as he felt him disappear into nothingness, along with Luna.
Ace and Luna reappeared in a messy apartment, trashed with dirty laundry. There was a half-eaten pizza on top of a
coffee table in the center of the room, in front of a worm-eaten, worn out futon. The carpets of the apartment were stained
with coffee and cum, and gave off a dank smell that reeked throughout the whole place.
"Wait here. When we return, we shall bear the tools necessary to clean all of the penile excrement off of thou." Luna said.
She disappeared into the bathroom, which appeared to be even dirtier than the rest of the apartment. Luna came back a
few minutes later with a bottle of Extra Strength Dial (with vitamins C, U, and M, for extra cleaning and skin care), and a
towel. She sat down next to Ace.
"So mortal. What sort of meeting did thou attend to become covered in such a substance as this?" She
bellowed.
"It was an Alcoholics Anonymous meeting. We meet up and talk about our addiction to booze." Ace answered.
"Ah, we understand. what hath thou;s addiction be?"
"I'm addicted to vodka. Y'know, the white stuff that comes out of dicks?"
"Dost thou speaketh of cum?"
"That's what Lyra called it! It's vodka! The pirate boy gave it to me on Nightmare Night 2011!"
Luna's eyes lit up.
"Pipsqueak! Of course! I should have known!" She kinda laughed.
"What are you talking about?"
"That young colt, Pipsqueak. He lied to thou. The stuff he gave to thou was actually semen. Thou art not addicted to vodka. Thou art just really, really gay!"
"Wait, so that stuff I thought was vodka... is actually semen? And I've... been gay?"
"Yes indeed."
Ace lowered his head in disappointment and covered his face with his hooves.
"I' m such a god-damn idiot..."
"Nay... Thou art the smartest stallion we have ever met since our return to Ponyville. Thou were deceived. Nothing more."
Luna got up off the couch and turned around so that her ass was facing Ace. Ace looked over and stared directly into her brown eye.
"What are you doing?" he asked, confused.
"Make love to us, Ace. We insist!"
"Sex?? In here?? Well... I guess I've had a pretty long dry spell... Aw what the hell. Why not. Sure Luna, I'll fuck you..."
"We are ever so grateful. Now please, allow us to arouse thou and make thou's cock erect."
Luna started to dance in front of Ace. She had 1000 years of practice when she was imprisoned in the moon, so she
really had the moves like Jagger. Ace's little wang began to harden. She continued to shake her groove thang. Before long,
Ace was wielding a stone wiener.
"Hey Luna." he said.
She turned around. "Yeah?" She said in a normal voice.
"It ain't gonna suck itself." Ace said, smiling and pointing down to his dick with his head. Luna smiled and walked toward Ace,
her eyes focused on his throbbing erection. When she was in range, she looked up into Ace's eyes, and then went down on
him.
Ace's wiener flourished in her mouth, as she gladly licked up and down his furry shaft. Luna looked up at Ace's face
and saw him tilted his head back with a goofy smile. She bit his dick a little bit and he snapped back to reality. Ace punched
Luna in the tits for that, but she just kind of took it because she's like that.
After about 13 minutes of sucking, Luna decided it was time for some vaginal penetration. She stood up, turned
around, and stuck her flank towards Ace.
"Hop on, big boy." Luna said calmly, with a wink. (Her voice changes to a normal one whenever she's horny).
"EHEHEEHEEEHEEHEHEHEE. OKAY!" Ace said. (Just for you, CottonCow ;D)
Ace stood up and made his penis take position. He lined it up with Luna's silky, blue vagina. With a forward push from
his waist, Ace's penis slid right into Luna. It reached into her cunt like a long finger, and tickled her ovaries. Luna giggled at
the pleasure and silliness of what was going on.
Now that Ace had a feel for her cunt, he began to thrust faster, pounding away mercilessly. Every now and then, just
for fun, he would take things really slow, as if trying to have Luna's pussy suck out every last drop of his penis. Ace went like
this for an hour, and along the way, he and Luna tried out every sex position on his '69 sex positions' app for iPhone.
After the 69th one, Ace felt like his download was preparing to start (he was about to cum). As he fucked Luna, his
download bar began to fill. When it got to about 69%, he pulled out of Luna and spun her around. She took the hint and
started to jerk him off and open her mouth.
"Oh baby..." Ace said, between stifled moans. "Give it to me... Give it to me please!"
"As you desire, Ace hardware." Luna bellowed.
With an upward thrust, Luna snapped Ace's dick in half. It made a loud 'CRACK!' as it broke, and then hung downward
at the middle of his dick; with the other half still erect.
"MY RACKET!!" Ace screamed in agony. As his penis hung downward at the middle, Ace began to dribble cum out of the tip
of his broken penis. He watched this happen and began to cry, also curling up into a ball on the floor.
"Would you like us to fetch some ice for your injured appendage?" Luna asked.
"NO! NO NO NO NO NO! JUST GET THE FUCK OUT OF HERE AND LEAVE ME BE." Ace yelled
"But, this is our apartment."
"You broke my dick! Just leave me here for a few days so I can cry a lot and then kill myself, k? I'll call you when I'm dead, okay?"
"Well, we were please to meet thou, greet thou, and break thou's meat, too! Haha! Farewell Ace Hardware of Ponyville. We will miss thou!"
Luna said her goodbye as she exited the apartment, leaving Ace in a fetal position in a puddle of his own cum. Ace cried for
about three hours, went into the kitchen and cut his balls off, and then shoved Luna's used tampons down his throat until he
died.
THE END.
A/N: DOWNVOTE THIS FIC, AND I'LL BREAK YOUR DICK!
