Hey, Nonny, Nonny

by Ringmaster1336

Rating: mature
Tags: My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, Human, Other, Comedy, Pinkie Pie, Sex
Length: 1836

What will happen Pinkie asks you to taste a new type of cupcake?

You have been living in Equestria for a while now, and live with Pinkie Pie. Her constant bubbly attitude and overbearing friendliness was never something you liked too much, in fact you didn't like it at all. But when certain event ensue, will your feelings for Pinkie change? (Co-written by Plagueboy23)

Published 2015-08-04 14:10:01 UTC
Last updated 2015-08-04 14:10:01 UTC

Chapter 1

“Nonny! You gotta try this new cupcake flavor I made!” Pinkie Pie yelled before nearly crashing into your room, just barely being stopped by your resilient bedroom door. You flinched as you heard the pink party pony hoot and holler about her newest culinary creation before you got off your bed and made your way to the door to open it for her, lest she start knocking with her skull, like last time. Ever since you were somehow blasted to this foreign dimension where animals were as sentient as humans, and Pinkie offered to take you in, it’s been nothing but cupcake tests and broken door hinges.

“Oh, joy.” You replied sarcastically, yet still smiling a bit as you roll your eyes. “What random object, edible or otherwise, will I find embedded in your baked goods this time? And I thought I asked you not to call me that. No offense, but I don’t want ponies to get the wrong idea by you calling me that all the time.”

Pinkie stifled a giggle with her hoof before replying, “I promise it’s not a jawbreaker this time. And why don’t you like it when I call you ‘Nonny’? it’s a cute name!”

“First of all, that was not a jawbreaker, it was a fucking marble. Second of all, my name isn’t Nonny. It’s Anon. I‘d rather be called by the name I was given at birth than one you made up!”

“But it’s not like it actually broke your teeth or anything. Plus it looked exactly like a jawbreaker…”

You chuckled a bit as you presented your rebuttal, “Yeah, and my nutsack looks like two raisins with elephantitis.” You shot back. Regardless of how much that marble did indeed look like a sugary treat, it didn’t taste like one, and while you knew she meant well, your teeth didn’t appreciate Pinkie’s idea, no matter how thoughtful it was intended to be.

Pinkie cocked her head in confusion at part of your statement. “What’s a nutsack?”

‘Oh, fuck me.’ you thought. ‘Wait a second. By pony standards, Pinkie is an adult. Don’t these ponies take sex ed somewhere down the line during their years in school?’ As you ended your thought, Pinkie spoke again.

“Oooooh, you mean your baby balloons!” Pinkie giggled, “Gee, humans sure have weird names for their party parts, huh?”

“Uh, sure.” You said, your response awkwardly trailing off. ‘Baby balloons? The fuck? I mean, I knew Pinkie liked parties and shit, but that’s just a strange amount of commitment to take every opportunity possible to make puns related to them.’

“Hey, Nonny?” Pinkie asked with a grin.

You sighed before turning to the pink pony, “Yeah?”

“What does your special streamer look like?”

“...Are you fucking serious?”

“Well, yeah! Nopony’s ever seen a human before you came along, so naturally, nopony would have any way to know what a human’s birthday candle looks like.”

‘Birthday candle?’ you thought to yourself in disbelief. ‘Why does everything have to be a pun about parties? Why does it have to be parties?’ As you were reevaluating your choice to live with Pinkie Pie, the pony in question jumped onto your chest, pinning you to your bed. “Hey! What the fuck, Pinkie?”

“Come oooooon~ Lemme see your party cannon! You’ve seen mine plenty of times, so it shouldn’t be such a big deal!”

You frowned. “Yeah, well that’s because your party cannon is a literal cannon that creates party atmospheres when fired, and mine is a reproductive organ.”

“Well then I’ll show you what my goodie bag looks like, deal?” Pinkie beamed with a huge smile.

“Uhh… no.” You replied promptly. You were in no rush to become well-acquainted with a pony’s ‘goodie bag’ any time soon.

Pinkie stomped around, almost in a childish way. “I wanna see it though! Come on, I’ll do anything.”

“No, Pinkie! I haven’t even lost my virginity yet! I don’t want a pony to be the first female to see my dick!”

“Wow, nopony’s let you frost their cake yet? That’s surprising.”

“Frost their cake? I just lost my appetite. Now whenever I taste test one of your cupcakes I have to think about this awkward situation. Thanks, Pinkie.” You replied, not holding back at all with the amount of sarcasm you invested into the statement.

“You wouldn’t be disgusted if you tasted Pinkie’s pie for yourself~ All the stallions say it tastes like strawberries.”

Okay, this is just creepy. A fucking pink pony is telling you to to lick its pussy. If anybody from your dimension heard you say that, you’d be stuck in an asylum for the remainder of your life. Could your life get any more awkward and oblong than it is right now?

“Here, just give it a lick, Nonny.” Pinkie giggled and turned around, raising her tail to reveal her winking sex to you. “I promise you’ll like it.”

You couldn’t believe it. There is literally a pink talking equine in front of you trying to seduce you into eating them out. “Nope.” You said before quickly pushing Pinkie off of your chest and heading for the door. You made it through your bedroom doorway, but as approached the stairs in the hallway, you found that Pinkie was already there, still spread eagle for you.

“It’ll taste even better than normal since I’m in heat.”

“Gah!” You flinched in surprise as soon as you saw and heard the horny pony speak. You were stuck. She was blocking the only exit, except for the window, which you were now considering at this point, given the options available in the recent turn of events.

“Nonny, come on. It’s been waaaay too long since somepony filled my frosting bag.” She said, panting a bit due to her now high state of libido. She backed up, grinding her round rump against your crotch, and as wrong as it was, you couldn’t stop from getting hard. You were a virgin, after all, and you definitely had the sex drive of a sex-deprived man. Your resolve was almost as weak as it was in your highschool years, during which you were willing to fuck any living thing with a vagina, and right now, Anon Jr. seemed to be lapsing back to his adolescent years.

“Oh, God…” You growled in lust as your hips began to involuntarily gyrate back against Pinkie’s movements as you gave in to your long-craved carnal desires. You grabbed a soft handful of pink pony plot in each hand and squeezed, earning an admittedly sexy moan from the owner of said equine booty.

Pinkie giggled as your hands prodded her ass cheeks. “Do you like my butt, Nonny?” She asked before pushing her rear harder against your denim-clad loins. This forced a groan from deep down in your throat, and your little buddy answered Pinkie’s question for you, giving a large throb between her ass cleavage.

Pinkie then stepped away from you, and you weren’t sure whether to feel relieved or disappointed. Before you could decide, she deftly undid your belt with her teeth, grabbed the waistband of your jeans and underwear, and pulled them down in one swift motion, causing your hardened prick to flop about wildly, finally free from the confines of its denim cage.

Pinkie was blushing madly as she reached up to stroke the underside of your thick shaft with her hoof. “Wow… And I thought some of the stallions here were big…” She licked her lips as she stared at your swollen schlong.

‘I’m actually about to do this.’ You thought to yourself. ‘I’m gonna let a pony suck my dick.’

Pinkie gave the head a few licks, making your whole cock swell and twitch from the sensation. “Oh, shit…” You groaned as Pinkie continued to lap at your manhood.

Pinkie must have had other plans for you, though, because as soon as you started to feel your orgasm approaching, she pulled her mouth off of your cock. She then turned around and just stood in front of you, her marehood inches away from your virgin dick.

“What are you waiting for, Nonny, an invitation?” Pinkie giggled. “I think I’ve got one here somewhere, hang on.” Pinkie then stuck a forehoof in her messy mane before pulling out a letter and handing it to you. “Here ya go!”

You stared at the letter in awe and confusion before opening it and almost getting hit in the eye with a burst of confetti. You glanced at the card, which simply read, “Buck me!” that was all the invitation you needed. You grabbed her thick, fleshy plot and thrusted your cock in hard, lodging yourself balls deep in your pony roommate.

Pinkie moaned loud, “Oh, Celestia yes!” She continued to scream erotic statements as you pounded her pink party ponut. You didn’t hold back at all; you squeezed her ass cheeks hard as you fucked her relentlessly. You felt her walls begin to pulse around your cock after about three minutes of fucking her, and she began to yell incoherent nonsense as her eyes rolled into the back of her skull and her tongue lolled out of her mouth. After her orgasm subsided, she looked back at you and, with a very lusty look on her face, gave you a command that you immediately obeyed. “Please, fuck my ass, Nonny!”

“Well,” You smirked, your sizeable cock still twitching against her vaginal walls, “since you asked so nicely.” After you finished your sentence, you pressed your cock, now slick with Pinkie’s mare-cum, against her tight pucker, and thrusted forward powerfully, your thighs burning from their overexertion. Pinkie bit her lip in an attempt to hold back a moan of pleasure, but it was to no avail. She screamed loudly as you bottomed out in her tight asshole, almost seeming to split her in half. You began to fuck her butthole relentlessly, earning you more incoherent squeals and moans from Pinkie, and within minutes, you once again felt your orgasm approaching quickly.

“Pinkie!” You grunted out, “I’m gonna-”

“INSIDE! PLEASE! FROST MY CAKE, NONNY!!!” These word which before seemed very strange to you, now proved to be a huge turnon. They were all you needed, as you unloaded years worth of pent-up semen directly into Pinkie’s ass. You both moaned uncontrollably for almost a full minute, both of your bodies tensed by your orgasms the whole time. When you finally came down from the most intense orgasm of your life.

For a few minutes, all that could be heard was you and Pinkie’s exhausted panting, which was soon accompanied by the pink pony’s voice.

“So…” She said in between heavy pants, “Wanna try those new cupcakes now?”

Author's Note

So there it is! I hope you all enjoyed, also check out Plagueboy23's page, and the story we're working on, You Thought You Knew Canterlot High. He Co-wrote this with me, so big thanks to him!

For now, I must go. My planet needs me.