Love and Muffins
A Derpy Doo Hooves in the Vogonverse Story
Chapter One ‘Where I belong’
(Tahlequah OK - 2059 - Winter)
The cold air blew in hard. A few of the older members of the community had seen winters like this before, but not one that had been planned. The fact that the president of the United States wasn’t even human wasn’t new news anymore, but it was still taking some time for everyone to get used to the idea of Pegasi being able to operate the weather. At the moment, Office Timothy O’Brian was standing outside, in freezing temperatures, marking off the street because it was simply too dangerous to travel down at the moment.
He shivered as he carried the old sawhorses, a term that a few of the pegasi beat officers wanted changed, and he heard the sound. It was crying voices, at least three of them, and he moved toward where they were.
“Hello?” he asked.
There were two unicorns and a gray pegasus. They looked at him, a little confused, and backed up slightly as he moved toward them. He sat down the sawhorse and knelt down so that he was more on the level of the smallest unicorn.
“Are you folks okay?” he asked.
“We.. We’re really cold,” the littlest unicorn said.
He looked them over, knowing that even if it wasn’t his job he couldn’t let them stay out here in the cold like this. The wind picked up at that moment, blowing the freezing air toward them. Officer O’Brian slipped his heavy wool coat off, draping it around the littlest of the three and lifted her up. She offered almost no resistance.
“Folks, you’ve got no reason to trust me, no reason other than the fact that I’m a police officer. But, I can’t just leave you out here. If you come with me I promise that I’ll get you to someplace warm,” he said.
Looking to each other, the Pegasus and bigger Unicorn nodded. He noticed that their walk was wobbly, at best, and that both of them were now holding onto him to keep balance. The wind was picking up, and he could feel the full brunt of it through his shirt. Cold didn’t even begin to describe how terrible it was out here. He walked, toward the black patrol car, opened the doors, motioned for them to climb in, which they did slowly, and walked around to his door. He opened it, climbed in, saw them shivering in what was at least a windless cold, and then he started the car.
During the winter months, it paid that the Police Department had diesel engines in the patrol cars; it was a huge help. He knew that they had contracts with the local fast food places to collect the used vegetable oil, strain it, and use it as the fuel. It worked fairly well, and right now he was going to let them enjoy the heat it gave. It took a few moments for the block to warm, and once it did he pressed the ignition. The engine caught, and once it did he turned on the heat.
He knew they were freezing. Anything alive would have to be freezing, and there was no doubt that the three of them had to be nearly froze to death. When the air began to turn warm the Pegasus and the larger Unicorn scooted closer to the vents. He took a moment to look at how they were dressed. The Pegasus was wearing what appeared to be a mail carrier’s uniform, something from earlier in the century, right down to her knee high blue shorts.
The larger Unicorn was wearing what appeared to be typical college clothes, and part of it was a blue and white t-shirt with CU on the front. The littlest one, the small Unicorn, she seemed to be dressed in a pale yellow sundress. Right now she was shivering inside of his old wool coat he had used to wrap her up. He paid some attention to his passengers, but at the same time he decided to put his underused digital assistant to some use.
“Fred, are you online?” he asked.
“Why howdy neighbor, it’s been a very long time since we’ve talked,” a disembodied voice said.
“I know Fred. Do me a favor will you? Will you check and see what shelters are open, and which ones have openings in them?” he asked.
“I’m sorry, but it appears that all of the shelters in the local area are currently full. There is no room at the inn, so to speak,” the voice said.
He could see the Pegasus looking for the other voice. In truth, he wished that he would have been more surprised about her appearance, but that just wasn’t the case. No, news of the Equestrians appearing had been happening since last year. They were no longer listed as helpmates, in truth none of the original helpmates were listed as helpmates anymore. Instead they were listed as sapient beings protected under the newly defined sapient being rights act.
He’d been able to accept the changes because his grandmother had always taught him that there was far more in the world than what people liked to believe. She had said that magic truly existed, and that we were often too blind to see it. The random appearance of the Equestrians was just part of that magic as far as he was concerned. And that left him with a serious decision. Either he put them back on the street, or he offered them a place to rest, get warm, and maybe get on their feet. In the end, the decision wasn’t hard. He turned off on a long and winding road following it carefully enough until he was finally up the hill the road passed over.
From there it was fairly easy to pull into a snow covered drive.
“Folks, it’s not much, the house is old, but it’s warm, and you’re all welcome to stay here for a spell,” he said.
Once they got inside he considered putting them into different rooms, but quickly decided against it. They had been together when he found them, and he was fairly certain that they would want to stay together through the night at the very least. As he walked them inside he could tell that they were feeling better. The small unicorn was snuggling into his arms as he carried her, and when he arrived at one of the rooms he opened it.
There was no denying that the old room had been someone else’s room. There was books, several books, on a small book shelf, a collection of posters on the wall, including one of band that none of the ponies knew. Something called the Rolling Stones. Derpy looked at the poster and studied the stallions on it. None of them looked like Rolling Stone. She had delivered his mail to him for years, but he wasn’t on a poster that had his name on it.
The stallion that brought them into his home walked over to the closet, dug around, and pulled out a few blankets. She watched as he quickly made the large bed for them, put the blankets on it, and told them that he would bring them something hot to eat in a few minutes. She smiled, sat down next to Dinky who was still wrapped up inside of his wool coat.
“He’s nice,” she said.
Derpy nodded. He was nice. He was being as friendly as any of the ponies she knew. After a few minutes he was carrying a small tray with three steaming bowls on it. He sat the tray on a dresser, and slowly brought them each a bowl and a towel under it for their laps. Derpy looked at the bowl she was handed and realized it was oatmeal.
“Sorry, but instant oatmeal was the only thing I had to fix that was hot, and wouldn’t take too long,” he said.
“Thank you,” she whispered before she took a bite. The taste of cinnamon and sugar mixed in with the oatmeal hit her tongue. It actually reminded her of when she used to visit Berry Punch.
That silly filly would fix oatmeal enough to feed a small army. Of course it was just her, her sister Pina Colada, and her daughter Berry Pinch. Because she fixed so much she would invite Derpy, Amethyst, and Dinky over. Those breakfasts were some of the best ones she remembered.
Derpy’s smile brightened as she ate the hot oatmeal, and she hadn’t even paid attention to notice that her daughters had already cleared their plates and practiced their best manners by belching as loud as they could in appreciation of the food. The stallion seemed to understand Pegasus manners and instead of acting all insulted, like some of the Unicorns did, he instead asked if they were still hungry. Their nodding heads answered for them, and she watched as he disappeared with their bowls only to reappear a few minutes later with more oatmeal.
“Eat up, I’ve got plenty of it,” he said.
They finished eating, then the three of them finally began to feel sleepy. He took their bowls, and before long the three of them fell into a relaxing sleep. In what seemed to be almost no time at all Derpy stretched as she woke up. The smell of something amazing was gently floating in the air. She sat up, feeling her back pop in a few places, and enjoyed the wonderful heat.
Beside her she noticed her two daughters. Her oldest, Amethyst, was starting to get up. She blinked, smacked her lips, and looked around at the off colored green walls. The room felt warm, very warm, and she didn't have the ungodly chill she had suffered last night.
"Mornin'," a voice said from outside of the door.
Derpy slowly walked toward the door to see the stallion that had saved them. Bits and pieces of last night came to her. How cold it was, how horrible the weather was, and her being outside with her two daughters and having no where to go.
She looked at the stallion and smiled. He had opened his own home to them when it was apparent that the 'shelters' he had contacted said they were full.
"Something sure smells good," she said.
He gave her a slight smiled and motioned toward the hall.
"I can cook the basics, bacon, hashbrowns, and eggs, but this morning I figured that a short trip to the bakery was in order. So I hope that y'all like muffins," he said.
For a moment both eyes aligned perfectly, her smile grew three sizes, and she lept from the bed, to him, and caught him in a huge hug.
"THANK YOU!"
The hug felt stronger than it should coming from a smaller form, but he happily accepted it, returned the hug, watched as she turned toward the bedroom and announced breakfast, and then in a flash she was gone.
It appeared that there was a slight gray blur where she had been. He watched the unicorns walk out. The youngest one was still wearing her sundress, but he could tell that it had been something not meant to be worn to bed. The wrinkles in it stood out for a mile, and while he didn’t mind he knew that there was some folks who would possibly pick on the little thing just because they could.
“Morning,” he said.
The little one smiled at him, and the older one made a sound something between a reply and a low grunt. He chalked it up to her not really being a morning person, or mare rather. He followed them to the kitchen where they saw the pegasus. She had four plates down, all four of them with no less than four muffins a piece. He also noticed that there was a small collection of muffin wrappers by her plate. Originally, he had bought the amount of muffins he did because of his guests, but also he had planned on them lasting about a week. Instead they were simply gone.
Did it really bother him? No. He’d be able to buy more muffins tomorrow, and if he really wanted to he could always get the mix and make them right here. The old stove and oven were ancient, compared to the more modern houses further in town, but they worked just as well. In fact he could remember his father, the early riser of their family, getting up before the rest of them and fixing breakfast on that very stove.
The old thing had been there for years. He’d heard about how it, and the house, had been passed down through his grandmother’s family. The old family had owned this piece of property since the late 1970’s. That meant that the house itself, the major appliances that still worked, and many of the original parts of the house was nearing a hundred years old.
There was a few tricks to dealing with a house that was older. One of them was realizing that sooner or later the house was going to need some tlc. “You treat an old house like a marriage,” his father had told him, “You love it, treat it good, and make compromises where you need to. If you do that son, then the house is going to last you all of your life, and then some.”
The old house had certainly lasted. IT had lasted, and once again there was a full house. His father had passed away about six years ago, his sister had moved off to the Puritist compound near Edmond Oklahoma, and his brother Davey was currently stationed in Iraq. It had been so long since there was enough folks in this house to make it feel like a home. He took a seat near the little unicorn, Dinky, and watched as she devoured her muffins like they were the last things on Earth.
“Mmmmm,” she moaned through her mouthful of food.
He took a bite, feeling the warmth of the blueberry muffin fill his mouth. The sweet taste mixed with the soft texture was well worth enjoying. He took another blast when it sounded like a foghorn erupted in his kitchen. He glanced around and saw the pegasus patting her belly, smile, and then reach for another muffin. A moment later another foghorn erupted, and he took a look at the older unicorn. She followed her, mother’s, example, patted her belly, smiled, but she didn’t grab another muffin.
“Wow… That was good, really good,” she said.
After a moment a much smaller foghorn erupted beside him. She looked up at him, hugged him again, and he gently hugged her back. He remembered his grandmother getting upset when he belched at the table, her rules about being respectful, but if they were okay with this he could at least try.
The burp he let loose was sad in its attempt.
“You didn’t like the muffins?” the Pegasus asked.
“I did… I…” he swallowed a little and this time with the right amount of air he unleashed another burp. This one was fairly massive, “My grandmother taught me that it was bad manners to belch at the table.”
The older Unicorn shook her head, “Sounds like she didn’t know good Pegasus manners. Mom taught Dinky and me all about good manners.”
He smiled, looked at the Pegasus, and got a gentle smile in return.
“I don’t think that I really got to introduce myself last night. I’m Tim, Tim O’Brian,” he said.
The Pegasus grinned at him, “I’m Derpy Doo Hooves, my daughter,” she pointed the smaller unicorn, “Dinky Doo Hooves, and my older daughter,” she said pointing to the other unicorn, “Is Amethyst Star.”
“It’s a pleasure to meet all of you,” he said.
Author's Note
What's this? A new story? Eeeeyup. This is the Derpy, Dinky, and Amethyst Star story that I wanted to do.
Love and Muffins
A Derpy Doo in the Vogonverse Story
Chapter 2 ‘Potential’
The days had turned into a week, and the week became two, and then three. During that time Derpy had learned that they were not on Equus, but instead they were simply someplace else. The revelation of that didn’t bother her as much as she believed it would. Instead, she found herself feeling at home here. Tim was a good stallion, kind, sweet, understanding, and the fact he was making muffins for them every morning didn’t hurt.
She looked at the walls of the home Tim was sharing with them. Dark wood paneling hung on the walls, making the rooms darker, but the curtains on the windows worked to brighten the room quite a bit. That was just this room. Over the time they’d been here Tim had managed to clear, and open, two more rooms giving her girls the chance to have their own rooms again. She knew that her daughters loved having their own rooms, but part of her very nature as a Pegasus wanted to have them close by.
She understood that they were different. After all, both of her daughters were unicorns, wonderful fillies that filled her heart with joy, but they weren’t quite wired like she was. She needed to ensure her foals were fine, she wanted to make sure there was no trouble to harm them, and she needed to be alert for threats. Having them in separate rooms made this harder. It was still okay, she could deal with it, but it made it harder for her to protect them like she wanted to.
She smelled something drifting into her room, and she followed the scent until she was in the kitchen. Once again Tim had made muffins for them, but he had also made those strange little waffles he called Eggo’s. She heard the sound of hoofsteps, and saw her daughters. Dinky yawned, as she neared the table. Her youngest had a terrible case of bed mane, her pajamas that Tim had gotten her looked all crooked, but she quickly found her seat, found a muffin, and practically crammed the entire thing into her mouth.
“Morning!” Tim shouted.
“Guffp Murphin!” Dinky replied back with her mouth full.
Amethyst walked toward the table, and where her mother, and her sister, were mostly dressed she was being a little lazy and showing up in a pair of panties and an oversized t-shirt. Derpy looked at her daughter, saw stretch, and then levitate a plate of waffles, and two muffins, toward her. She took a seat, opened up a jar of honey, and started to drench the waffles in it. Derpy watched Tim as he neared the table. He stopped, saw Amethyst and instead of saying something he just smiled, fixed a plate, and took a seat.
Derpy fixed her own plate, still uncertain if she should be concerned about her daughter coming to breakfast in the state of dress she was in. Like most Pegasi she noticed things, and one thing she had noticed since being here was that humans seemed to like being clothed most of the time. It didn’t make a whole lot of sense to her, after all it was far more comfortable to simply run around without clothes, but it was part of their culture.
She glanced Tim again, and he stopped cutting up the waffles. Instead he looked at everypony at the table, and grinned, “You know, this is nice. The house hasn’t been this full in a long time. It almost feels like all of my family is back in the house with me. To be honest, Amethyst you’re pretty well dressed like how my little sister Charline used to dress when she came to breakfast.
Relaxed now that she understood that what Amethyst was wearing was acceptable Derpy began to cut into her own breakfast. She started with the Lemon muffins, and while they were nice she wanted to teach Tim how to make Lemon Surprise muffins. When she finished she gathered the dishes, walked toward the dishwasher, and began loading it. In truth, she liked having something that washed the dishes for her. It was kind of spoiling her, but it was something she could deal with.
Tim walked behind her, putting up the honey, and then he stopped. She turned to see him giving her one of his gentle smiles, and he handed her a piece of paper. She opened it and a wave of relief flooded through her. She hugged him tightly, and he returned it, knowing that she’d let go when she was good and ready, and not a moment before. She practically jumped up and down, and part of her wanted to take off flying and share the great news about what had happened!
“I got it! I got the job!!!!” she shouted.
Her daughters made their way toward her.
“What job?”
Tim looked at them and then at Derpy who was still riding up on cloud nine.
“Your mom put in for a mail carrier position. Our local post office was hiring, and since she had experience she decided to put in for it. I told her she didn’t have to do it, but she wanted to.”
“Really? Mama you got a job?”
Dinky looked at her mother, eyes full of wonder, and then she caught her in a tight hug. It was one that her mother happily returned and then she was caught in another hug by Amethyst. The two held onto her for a bit before they finally let go of their mother.
“So when do you start?”
Amethyst smiled, waiting for her mother to finish reading the paper. Derpy looked back at it, her smile still bright, and Tim couldn’t help but feel proud for her.
“On Monday… Monday! That’s three days away!” Derpy cheered and then she looked at Amethyst, “What about you? I want you to finish school.”
Amethyst looked somewhere else other than at her mother, “Ummm… yeah, I’ve thought about it, and I guess that I could put in for one of the colleges around here.”
Derpy looked at her, closed her left eye, and looked at her daughter with her good right eye, “You need to. I want you to finish school. It’s important, and I want you to not have to work so hard.”
Amethyst knew that it was hard for her mom to really express herself. It wasn’t that her mom wasn’t a smart mare, Derpy was, but she knew that Pegasi usually relied on body language, signals from one another. That was how most of them communicated. She couldn’t do all of the signals that her mother could do, but she understood what her mother was saying.
Realizing that there was absolutely no way of getting out of trying to apply for schools she nodded. Derpy seemingly happy with her daughter’s response looked to her youngest. Tim had said that his friends in the Education System were looking into getting Dinky into school soon, but that it might be at the beginning of the school year. That meant that she would have to be out for another few months. But then Tim told them about digital schools. He explained that several students, both those going to Universities and those going to public schools, tended to go to the online schools instead.
It tended to be about as easy to get into, and Dinky would still get interactions, but those interactions would be with ponies across the world. She had agreed to it, and her daughter was usually in a seat, with goggles on her eyes, gloves on her hands, and she was interacting with ponies that her mother couldn’t see. It bothered her, a little, but from what Tim said no pony could hurt her, no pony could do more than say words to her, and she could mute them if she wanted to.
It still felt wrong, not having her interact with other ponies, but Derpy knew that it was important for her foal to get an education. She needed to get the education so that she could grow up and be a productive mare with a bright future. She desperately wanted to see her little Dinky succeed, and she wanted the same for Amethyst. She practically floated in the air for a moment. Tim was being sweet, kind, and nice to all of them. He wasn’t asking for anything, and he was being so good to her foals.
That made her really think about him. He was good to her foals, he treated them just like they were his own, trying to be good to them, trying to make sure that they had food, water, clothes, and he was doing everything right. She took a look at how he looked. He was overweight, she could see the way he filled his street clothes as he called them, and they told the tale of a man who enjoyed cooking, and eating, and the occasional sweet.
Even so he wasn’t afraid of hard work, she’d seen that, and that was part of the reason she was watching him. Pegasi dating was so different than Earth Pony dating. Earth Ponies liked to take things slow, except for Pinkie Pie she shook her head as she thought of the party mare. She was certain that Pinkie had some Pegasus in her blood, it was the only way to explain how she enjoyed doing some things faster than most Earth Ponies.
Still, thinking about them she looked at Tim and she wondered if he was like them. Earth Ponies had dating rituals that took time. They liked to know the other pony would be able to share the burden, and they wanted their families to know them. Family was important, but so was the flock, and of course a flock had to be okay with a potential suitor. She stopped the line of thinking. As a Pegasus was considering him, she really was, but she wanted to do this right, get to know him, follow the Earth Pony way, even if some of them were kind of backwards.
“Good news!” he shouted.
“Oh?” she asked.
He walked toward her, and brought over a flat black screenie thing he called a monitor. He turned it on a moment later it showed a huge school. There was hundreds, no thousands of ponies there.
“Dinky’s been accepted. This is Ludus 1887659, and they’ve accepted her. Dinky, you’ll be starting school tomorrow, and if you like going here they said that they can keep you enrolled in the virtual school,” he said.
Derpy watched her daughter look at it and then at a pair of goggles. She slowly pulled the goggles on, and then she looked around.
“Wow! This is so cool! There’s ponies everywhere!” she started to walk and then she felt something pulling.
“Woah, wait a moment, these are from the department of Education, so they basically have to be hooked up to the console. That said, I did some talking to a couple of friends, and we’re pretty sure that we can set up a treadmill for you to walk on for the simulation of going to class. Although you really don’t need it. You will however need these,” he said as he held out a pair of gloves.
Dinky pulled up the goggles to see the gloves and she slid them over her fingers. When she did they resized to fit properly, and then she put the goggles back on. Timothy had her reach up and press a small place on the side of the goggles and then they readjusted for her. They also had something slide out and enter into her ears. She grinned as she moved her head around, and she stretched out her hand. Derpy noticed it looked like she was giving someone a hoof bump, and then a moment later she was sitting down.
“What’s she doing?” Derpy asked.
“Oh, well, she isn’t officially in the school until tomorrow, but they’re letting her sit in on the class today,”
He pointed to the screen and Derpy could see the teacher. She could see about forty other students, and after he pressed a button she could see Dinky herself sitting there among them. She watched the screen, feeling better that she could see her daughter, and see the school foals there with her. She breathed out a sigh of relief and then looked back at Timothy. He grinned at her, brushed a bit of stray mane out of her eyes, and she blushed brightly as he did.
Before he could say a word she gave him a kiss. After all, a kiss wasn’t too fast, at least she didn’t think it was.
Author's Note
(AN: Okay, so it's been a while, but I had to do an update. Thanks everyone, and I will be trying to update my stories a little more often.)
