The Muffin Queen

by CompleteChaos21

Rating: everyone
Tags: Comedy
Length: 424

After consuming a corrupted muffin, Derpy Hooves finds herself face to face with an...odd pony.

When the Doctor brings home a strange muffin from a strange world there is only one thing Derpy Hooves could do. EAT IT! But this is no ordinary muffin, sealed inside its sweet muffiny goodness is the soul of an ancient leader. The Muffin Queen. Not only will Derpy have a bad tummy ache, now she must deal with (and conquer) the2nd soul living inside of her. Through Enigmatic Machinations, to nightmarish transformations, tyrannical rule, and silly Derpyisms. Will our favorite wall-eyed mare be able to retain herself, or lose her body to the Queen. (This starts off as a Poem, then a story to supplement it)

Published 1970-01-01 00:00:00 UTC
Last updated 2012-05-25 04:55:01 UTC

Chapter 1: Meeting of Muffins

The Muffin Queen

Like yeast in dough, I rose up high.

But soon, I ceased to fly.

Soon I was caked in my own demise.

Baked into this pastry disguise.

But thou hath set me free.

With a bite, munch, crunch. 1, 2, 3.

I hath been set free, but thou hath consumed me.

Trapped!

Not 1 but 2.

Mine own eyes seeing only what be in front of thee.

My simple plea?

To escape from this catacomb that surrounds me.

Oh, Silly mare.

With your eyes drooping and your heart beating.

Your bags filled with letters and your mind in gutters.

Wings of grey.

A mane like sunshine.

Tis’ be very colors of that which be mine.

Derpy: Hey now missy your making my head hurt.

Muffin Queen (MQ): What be this strangest voice…canst thou heareth me?

Derpy: Well yea, been hearing about every single thing you’ve just monologue’d.

*Derpy Appears*

MQ: Oh it be you grey mare…

What purpose dost thou have for being here?

Derpy: What are you doing here?

Last time I checked this was my muffin…I mean my mind!

MQ: Your mind?!?

Why dost thou have a mind with the equivalent properties of a purple tinted tempest?

Derpy: Like I’ve always said to my self and others, the inner machinations of my mind are an enigma.

MQ: Very enigmatic indeed, tell me mare…what be thine name?

Derpy: Well my name is Derpy Ditzy Doo Hooves.

MQ: Most interesting of names, I am the Muffin Queen.

Derpy: A Queen! Of Muffins! I wish I was a muffin queen I love muffins there so yummy and they bring everypony together why if everypony ate more muffins I think there’d be less violence in Equestria don’t you!

MQ: Umm…yes dear Derpy methinks your right with that…listen to my words mare, if thou givest me what is yours. Thou shall receive what be mine.

Derpy: …Like what?

MQ: In exchange for some control of your body, you get to become the queen of muffins!

Derpy: I get to become a Muffin Queen!

MQ: Yes my friend, thou shall receive a queenly state upon the assumption of my powers.

Derpy: We’ll show all the ponies the good muffins can do! Let’s do it!

*Derpy’s mind image and the MQ’s mind image morph together*

*Demonic Giggle*

Derpy/MQ: YES! YES! Thou hath opened thine mind and thine own soul too.

*Evil Demonic Laughter*

*There evil eyes glow white and engulf the whole poem*

Even the freshest of muffins still decay!