Prologue
The quiet, yet annoying sound of equipment rattling around my 'living quarters' was enough to keep me awake. The only good thing about being up this late with nothing to do was that I was able to do some deep thinking, asking philosophical questions like: 'Why was I here?, What's gonna happen next? And what that little yellow stain on the left shoulder of my jacket was.'
I used to count the days I'd spent here but after about three hundred and something I began to lose count. In my opinion, time will always be an enemy, you either have too much or too little.
Maybe I'm being a bit too vague here.
An unknown amount of time ago I awoke in this Hell-Hole of a place. Through a long line of mishaps and misunderstandings I became somewhat of a circus freak, I get towed into one town, amuse the folk that inhabit the area then move on to the next.
I don't like to complain but I've never really liked the way they treat me, they see me as some kind of animal, they laugh and they point at me, it's pretty humiliating to say the least. But hey, what do they know? They're all convinced that this is whole thing is just a peaceful little family circus and everything is peaches n' cream...but it ain't.
Anyway, this whole circus, that we shall dub 'The Freakshow', is a mix of overly long and boring shows, cheap and tacky merchandise, absolutely moronic customers and finally, there's us: the freaks.
There was Violet Daisy, who had three inactive horns on her head, Black Scorpion, who had 72 teeth, Rail Blaze, who could swallow swords and...well you kinda get the idea, we're all an odd bunch, we're exploited for that, life goes on the same as ever.
I was suddenly pulled out of my deep thoughts as my body was jolted forward by the carriage stopping, we must have arrived at the new town. Ponyville, I think it's name was.
The usual shtick was that we'd arrive at the new location early into the morning before the residents awoke and set up shop, the head honcho of sorts would then do her usual shtick and start bossing all of us around.
My concentration was broken once again as the wooden wall I was resting against began knocking and speaking to me.
"Hey, are ya up yet?" Came the muffled and almost whisper of a voice emanating from the conjoining wagon behind mine.
"Yeah, I'm up, well I didn't sleep again so I was never really down." A long sigh could be heard, you didn't have to see her to know she was smiling by the pitch of her exhale.
"Y'know, I would've excepted a simple 'yeah' or a moan or something!"
"I've been up for three days! My brain's a little melted." I ran my fingers through my greasy, brown hair. There was a small bump at the back of my head from where I had previously said some things I shouldn't have and the boss had disciplined me.
Rail's voice was a mix of giddiness and grogginess from waking up such a short time ago. "Well, you better get it un-melted by the time the show starts, we have a special guest remember?"
"What, that Sparkle Princess?" A soft giggle from Rail then ensued.
"No, Princess Twilight Sparkle! You have to be on your best behaviour today! That means no trouble, got it?" I hated the way she said that, she made out like I was some sort of animal or child, I get enough of that on stage.
"I'm not a baby! I can take care of myself!"
"I'm not sayin' that, it's just you have the tendency to act out a lot." I don't act out that much, I mean, there was a phase where I had wanted to plummet The Freakshow into the horrible ground of financial disarray and ruin the life of a certain third person-talking, light blue, stupid hat wearing monster and make her hopes and dreams burn to ashes in a fiery ball of death and fire, but, I'm totally over it!
A door abruptly slamming could be heard out in the emptiness of night, the boss would usually wait in her luxury carriage upfront and relax until she needed to start bossing us around.
Today was different; I'm always acquainted with different.
And it just so happened that the sounds of assertive hoof prints making there way through the dirt seemed to be approaching my wagon.
The almost rusty lock keeping me from my escape was heard unsnapping open and being taken off my wagon door. As the door was being slowly opened, early morning light slid into the room like an unwanted guest pushing itself rudely into the room.
A light sapphire coloured hoof emerged through the door and firmly placed itself down on the dirty wooden floor, almost emanating with power and presence. I could already feel the anger flow through my body, as if it were a hot molten lava coursing through my veins. This feeling had only recently appeared.
"So, did you enjoy your sleep?" Came the squeaky and whiny voice I'd become so accustomed to. The blue pony pulled herself into the room with her iconic stupid purple cape and stupid purple hat.
"Well, if I'm being honest, not really! I was just missing you too much to get some shut-eye!" I had actually thought of that line about a week ago, it seemed cleverer and funnier back then.
A somewhat strange yet evil chuckle escaped her mouth, it had grown over time from something I had once considered cute to something that haunts me in the rare times of sleep I'd get.
"It's nice to see my little, Monkey Boy acting a little jollier than usual today!"
"I'd act a hell of a lot jollier if you dropped that name."
"Whatever do you mean?" She was toying with me, as always. She pushed her hat up to take a better look at me and snickered. "Listen, Monkey Boy, today is a very important day for me, we've arrived at a town that, let's say, has a lot of meaning to me."
"Is it because you made an ass of yourself last time?" Her eyes widened with anger and shock, she leaned down to become eye level with me, almost as if she was literally trying to peer into my soul.
"And, how do you know about that?!" She screamed into my face. I had heard it from Rail, Trixie had come to this town expecting to win some sort of magic duel, it obviously didn't go too well. I could feel a small vibration in the wall behind me, it was probably Rail knocking the wall and signalling that she didn't want her good name soiled.
"It doesn't matter..." I said, avoiding eye contact and tensing up, expecting violence to ensue. She stood up straight and quietly growled. A sadistic smile then grew on her face, followed by that same nightmare inducing chuckle. A smile like that topped with her chuckle always meant bad news for me.
"So, Monkey Boy, do you remember the special exhibit we put on last Nightmare Night?"
"Do you mean, Halloween?" She rolled her eyes, either because she didn't understand the reference or because she wanted to say what she had to say. Probably both.
"Well, we put some zombie make-up on Shadowblossom, then chained him up and made him act like some sort of crazy cannibal!" I didn't like where this was going. "The Great and Powerful Trixie then had an idea," She angled her head to the left and looked me up and down.
Fear and curiosity filling up my body now.
"What!?" I exclaimed.
"The brilliant idea was that we take away all the Nightmare Night stuff, and just chain my little, Monkey Boy up instead!" My eyes widened in horror and sudden fury.
"What!? You can't do that! I have human rights!"
"Not here you don't," An evil chuckle ensues again, "You shouldn't worry, it's not going to hurt. You're going to do a meet and greet, of sorts."
"'A meet and greet!?' I'm not a goddamn Disneyland mascot!" She brushed off my comment almost instantly and began walking out of the wagon with a victorious swagger, knowing that in the end I'd have to comply. If it weren't from failed experience, I would try and run away, but the last time I tried that I hadn't gotten more that thirty feet before the guards and her had caught me, I had thought that I would have at least gained enough attention to get help from any of the other beasts around. But, Trixie had used her evil powers of persuasion to convince all passers-by that I was merely 'sleep-hypnotised'.
Not only that, but I didn't really have anywhere else to go, I don't have the slightest clue on how to get out of this world and I don't think there's an 'Endangered Human Reserve' where I could live.
"After your show, the other freaks will take you over to the meet and greet tent where you'll spend the rest of the day." The way she said it was so forcing, like there wasn't even a millimetre of room to squeeze in my opinion. I longed for the times where she wasn't like this.
"You used to be so nice." Trixie swung the door open and tipped her hat down, covering half of her eyes like some sort of warped cowboy.
"Oh, Trixie is nice," Her voice turned to a savage whisper, "But not to dumb animals like you." The painful, yet smart comment made by the sapphire demon, pierced a stinging hole into the back of my mind like a bullet being fired into a sick dog's head.
Using her magic to close the door behind her, Trixie jumped off the wagon and left me alone. I instantly buried my head in my hands and produced a muffled scream, mixed with curse words unknown to the creatures here.
Rail's reassuring voice pushed its way through the wall. Her tone was shaky and sympathetic. "Hey, don't listen to her, you're not a dumb animal."
"Well, if I'm not, then why does everything here keep saying it?" A long and awkward silence then entered the conversation. I didn't really expect an answer from her and even if she did have one, it probably wouldn't have helped me much.
I've learnt that talking doesn't help me much in life; not here nor home. Talking is the reason I got in trouble in the first place. Talking is the reason they all doubted me. Talking is the reason I'm trapped here. Talking is the problem. Think more, talk less, I say. Keep it bottled up in a bottomless glass and never talk about it.
Elsewhere, in a small cottage overflowing with wildlife, lived a timid yellow pony who was nervously optimistic about having a day out with her best friends.
"Now c'mon, Angel, you know it's good for you." The shy pony was beginning to lose her patience, if her little bunny didn't eat its spinach salad, she may just have to ask politely again.
Her concentration was broken by the sound of her front door being practically knocked down, the noise had startled her but she had a good guess for who was behind it, so it didn't scare her as much as it usually would.
You see, it was one of her best friend's little sister's birthday today, and as a treat, all her friends had organized to take the birthday girl to the circus that was coming to town, but not only that, this certain circus inhabited the world famous: Monkey Boy.
In all honesty, Fluttershy was quite anxious about the whole ordeal, ever since she had heard about the strange creature's arrival in Equestria, she had had a strange feeling of mixed fear and curiosity, but after finding out it had agreed to join a travelling circus, run by The Great and Powerful Trixie no-less, it morphed the fear into suspicion and had given off a very fishy smell.
As she trotted over to open the door, she heard the salad bowl being rudely shoved away, like a bratty child pushing away broccoli and sprouts. She'd have to go pick up some nicer vegetables for her little Angel while she was out.
She opened the door and revealed herself to the world, the shy pony was once again startled by a little white unicorn standing right against the door, almost shaking from excitement.
"Hey there, Fluttershy! Guess who's birthday it is!?" Excitement was obviously flowing through her whole body and seeping out through the mouth. But, it was understandable and extremely cute. To her sides were her two best friends, Applebloom and Scootaloo, they weren't as close to the door as Sweetie Belle and frankly looked a little embarrassed.
"Um, is it yours by any chance?" She asked in a joking tone, trying not to make it seem like she was mocking her.
"It's mine! I'm ten! And we're all gonna go see the famous Monkey Boy 'cause it's in Ponyville today!" A faint, green magic was trying to squeeze itself out of her horn and erupt like an overexcited volcano.
"Calm down, Sweetie Belle," Scootaloo said, "you're so red you look like you're gonna blow up!" Putting a hoof around the ticking time bomb of excitement to try and settle her.
Fluttershy covered her mouth with her hoof to cage a soft giggle.
"Well, you're very much in luck because I just so happen to have an emergency birthday present, right here." Sweetie Belle instantly began shaking again, as if somepony had sent a thousand volts through her little body.
Fluttershy then backed off slowly to retrieve the present, stashed away under a little stool behind the door, the gift was enveloped in a shiny red wrapping paper with little cartoon bells scattered around it. As she passed the parcel to the vibrating foal, she instantly yanked the present from Fluttershy's hooves. But before she could rip the paper from the present like a hungry lion ripping off the skin of a deer, a faint voice could be heard emanating from a very agitated older sister.
"What did I tell you children about running off!?" The glamorous white unicorn stomped her hoof on the ground in anger.
Followed by the unicorn was a gang of five other ponies dressed in party hats and covered in confetti, the pink pony more than any of them.
Talking for the group, Sweetie Belle spoke up. "We're sorry, Rarity." Applebloom gave Sweetie Belle a little shove.
"Ugh, 'we're sorry?', me an' Scootaloo are only here 'cuz you ran off!" Save for Rarity, the gang of ponies all giggled at the innocent sight. A very country looking pony placed her hoof around the unicorn and smiled, obviously having more trust in the little fillies than her. Rarity sighed in relief, understanding that she should have more faith in her little sister.
"It's alright, Sweetie Belle, just be more careful." The two exchanged smiles as she, Scootaloo and Applebloom began trotting back to the group. Fluttershy said goodbye to her little animal friends, locked her door and headed down to meet the group of friends waiting for her.
The group greeted her with grins, hugs and giggles. A sight that would give a sentient clump of cotton candy diabetes.
"So, Fluttershy," The rainbow maned pegasus said as the group began their trip to Town Square, "You excited about seeing that Monkey Boy thing?"
"Oh, yes it'll be really fun..." Fluttershy swiftly averted her eyes. The pegasus lifted an eyebrow in question at Fluttershy's tone and expression.
"You are pumped for it, right?"
"Y-yes, of course I am, it's just..." Now all the ponies, except the little fillies who had once again ran off ahead, were giving Fluttershy curious looks. "I just feel bad for the poor thing, I mean, it mustn't like being stuck in chains and put in cages." Twilight Sparkle, the obvious leader of the group, trotted next to Fluttershy and tried to reassure her.
"There's really nothing to worry about, Fluttershy. Trixie seems to be taking good care of him and the thing seems happy enough. The top critics in Canterlot gave their circus a high rating of 4.7 out of 5 last year, now taking that and the duration of the Monkey Boy and it's feedback into consideration we can say it has an enjoyment percentage of-" The rainbow maned pegasus groaned loudly and cut off Twilight Sparkle.
"B-but what if she's lying? You know how manipulative she can be."
Twilight rolled her eyes. "Fluttershy, Trixie isn't as bad as she was before, she's reformed now, remember?"
"Yeah!" The pink pony exclaimed, "She even changed her name to The Great and Apologetic Trixie!"
"I think she was just joking, Pinkie." Twilight said, as the group laughed. Fluttershy scrunched up her face and tried to push away the uneasy feeling that was latched onto her. Not wanting to put an end to her friends joy, she simply hid her feelings under a worn out and very, very reused blanket.
"So, when ya hear Trixie say the line 'I need to teach you a few manners', ya gotta turn and get ready for the pie." Rail explained.
"Y'know the whole 'Pie-in-the-face' gag is way too overused," I say, looking into the mirror and expecting my integrity to literally ooze out of my body. "It's cliché as hell too."
Rail rolled her eyes and smiled. "You wanna tell Trixie that?" I bent down and lazily tucked my laces into my shoes, the metal shackle locked onto my ankle was depriving me of the small feeling of freedom I was holding onto; the chain was connected to the back wall, it was long enough to allow me to sheepishly walk around, but not long enough to make a run for it. I sighed and followed Rail to the large pair of curtains separating the outside world from this one.
I slightly parted the curtains to take a peek outside, to no surprise, I was met with a sea of multicolour trash, the things were all bungled together, some in picnics and others playing football or Frisbee, all eagerly awaiting to see a freak or two. As soon as my show finished, the rest of the circus would open and the ponies would be free to wonder about and see all the other freaks who were either performing on stage or doing their own thing behind a stall. Sadly to say, I was not allowed this type of freedom.
While eyeing up the crowd, I spotted a small string of ponies that caught my attention: six ponies and three small foals all huddled together, laughing it up and chatting aimlessly, save for one: a yellow pegasus, slightly away from the group, looking quite anxious and nervous. I couldn't understand, I mean, I've seen unhappy ponies before, I used to try and lash out at them back when things were just starting to turn to shit, but this is a different feeling, one that I haven't seen in quite some time: sympathy, I think.
As I was staring at this enigma of a pony, I pushed my head a little further out of the curtains and squinted my eyes, analysing the pegasus and trying to figure out it's emotions, but I was put into shock as the pony's eyes awkwardly met mine, it's little mouth dropped as it realized it was being watched. My eyes opened and I froze like a teenage boy who had been caught reading dirty magazines. The pony shuffled and looked at it's friends; they were still unaware of the little encounter. It turned back to me and stared for even longer, after a few seconds though, it seemed to calm down, closing it's mouth and looking a little more relaxed. It then smiled at me, but it was not a smile of mockery or humiliation, but of kindness, like there was no alterer motive behind the smile other than trying to make me feel happy. I smiled back, I couldn't remember the last time I had smiled.
"Hey, what are ya lookin' at?" Rail asked from behind me. I retracted my head, without taking my eyes of the pony until the curtains were closed and it was impossible to see it any more.
"Oh, ugh, nothing." I lied.
"Well, ya better get ready, show starts in second," I turned to face her and sighed once again. "C'mon, dude, just block out the shame and stay calm!" She said with a cheeky smirk. I rolled my eyes and heard the fire exit open up. Walking in was Trixie, with that permanent 'I'm the boss, look at me' type of swagger her body didn't know how to shut off.
As she walked to the curtains she tilted her towards me. "Monkey Boy..."
"Trixie..." I replied.
She walked towards the small gap between the curtains and peeked outside. She stood back and prepared herself for her grand opening. "You're going to be good today aren't you, Monkey Boy?"
I took to my place and stood a few steps behind Trixie and clicked my fingers. "Oh yes, Trixie, I'll be as good a gold for my favourite little pony in the world!" Rail snickered at the comment. Trixie's head darted towards Rail.
"Shouldn't you be making sure my fireworks are prepared?" Rail's smile disappeared as she turned and marched to her work station. Rail's main department was swallowing swords, but Trixie had her do small jobs someone with half a brain could accomplish; Trixie wasn't a very trusting person...pony...whatever.
Trixie cleared her throat and straightened her back. "Well, ready?" She questioned.
"S-sure..." I sheepishly say.
"I wasn't talking to you, idiot!" Trixie shrieked, "Are you ready, Rail?"
Rail nervously nods at Trixie, who is now sitting behind a metal box with levers and buttons sticking out, she flicks a few switches and music loudly plays, causing all the dumbfounded ponies in the crowd to have their attention drawn to the stage, awaiting the entertainment that is about to commence.
Trixie bends down and springs through the small gap between the curtains to have her entrance known and dramatic. The dimmed sound of exploding fireworks could be heard from the other side of the curtains. Trixie then starts her big speech to get the crowd excited: 'Greetings everypony' blah, blah, blah, 'strange creature from another land' blah, blah, blah, 'cheesy joke' blah, blah, blah, 'and now the moment you've been waiting for...'
"Alright, dude," Rail says, "Get ready for your big reveal."
"Yep..." This is it. This is my life. This is my purpose. Everything is empty. Think more, talk less. Suck in the hope and breath out despair. Think more, talk less. The only escape was in my mind, and even then it's a mental battlefield. Think more, talk less. Hide the pain. Think more, talk less.
The curtains began to slowly part like a red, velvet sea. Unwanted light flooded in and consumed all that was dark, making it it's own. I squinted my eyes and lifted my hand to my face to block out the beautiful yet blinding light, and stepped forward. The world turned a shining white, everything was gone, I was alone, walking towards the light.
Then, the white faded, my eyes adjusted and I saw everything. This is it. This is my life. This is my purpose. Everything is empty.
