A Discorded Day

The New Ponyville Library

3:41 CS (Celestial Sun, or 3 hours 41 minutes after the Sun is raised by Celestia)

It was a beautiful day outside. The birds where chirping, the sun was shining, and a cool breeze was blowing, making sure that the day would not be uncomfortably hot. However, there were two beings who decided to forego the beauty that Celestia’s day brought upon this world.  The only beings of their kind, a human, and a draconequus , had formed an unlikely alliance, wherein, on beautiful days such as this, they were to immediately abandon anything they were doing and immediately barricade themselves inside the library. The barricade, a sign that said ‘CLOSED! Go Away! This Means YOU!,’  had so far been successful in keeping away most ponies that tried to get the human and draconequus to enjoy the wonderful day outside.

Inside, you could feel the negativity emanating from the two beings in the form of poison joke smoke, and spite.

“Last time I went out on a day like this one, I got cuddle-snuggle-ponypile-abducted by the Royal Equestrian Armed Forces, was made to do unspeakable acts, was once again cuddle-snuggle-ponypiled and then dumped back here without even a ‘thank you’ from any of them! And i thought ponies were supposed to be polite!” ranted the human known as Doctor Quack.

“At least they didn’t teach you a friendship lesson” replied the Draconequus known as Discord.

The human took a puff from a rolled up posion joke. “Puh-lease! After I was done with them, they were so giddy that I got about a hundred lessons in two minutes....”

The rants continued, the two talking about their hatred for beautiful days like today.

Now, you may be wondering what happened to that slight breeze that I talked about in the intro. Well, my dear readers, that slight breeze blew away what little cloud cover there was, allowing the sun to shine just a little brighter. The light found its way through a small crack in the curtains and hit something metallic, which made it glint just a little bit.

“...days like this make me want to create some chaos, and somehow be free from any consequences.” sighed Discord.

It was at this moment that something caught the human’s eye.

“Hey! I’ve got an idea!” said the human. He stood up, grabbed the glinting object, and handed it to Discord.  “Zecora gave this to me saying something about ‘this amulet would mess with my mind, maybe making me appreciate more her wonderful behind.”

“You know she was hitting on you right?” asked Discord.

“Oh come on! Ponies seem to have nothing down there!” answered the human.

“Magical underwear, my dear friend. You saw the changelings having those advertisements in them? It’s kind of like that, magic that’s not really magic so your eyes cannot see the almighty panty. Once they put it on, it blends with their fur and allows their cutie marks to be seen, while making sure the more enticing parts of their anatomy is hidden.”

The human facepalmed.

“Don’t worry. I’m working with someone to get your ship to sail. Trust me when I say you should wear those Japanese slippers Twilight gave you the next time you go out.”

The human facepalmed once again.

Discord inspected the object that was given to him. “This looks to be the Alicorn Amulet. It’s like a free pass to do pretty much anything you want and blame it on mind control.”

“I’ve tried wearing it. So far it’s just been a pain in the neck,” said the human

“Here goes chaos!” said Discord as he put on the cursed amulet.

A powerful surge of magical energy coursed through the draconequus. The human expected him to evolve into a final form but was disappointed when Discord remained the same. The draconequus snapped his fingers and disappeared.