Manhunt: Equestria

by ShumpireMadness

Rating: everyone
Tags: Crossover, Dark, Human, Comedy, Romance, Adventure
Length: 4

What will happen as James Earl Cash gets magically teleported to Equestria? Will the gangs follow suit?

"Uh, what the hell…." I said as I got back to my feet. "How did I get here?" I asked while looking around. It seems to be a village of some sort. But there's one thing that I find weird. The houses. The roofs were made of hay, except for a particular building. It looks like it just came out from a fairy tale. It was made out of…candy. But as I knocked on the structure, it sounded solid, more like wood. Then, I started to recollect my memories. Strangely, all I remember is that I was knocked out by a Wardog member. But I was in Carcer City when that happened.
"Um, excuse me but what and who are you?" I heard a woman's voice say right behind me. I turned around and was pretty relieved that it wasn't a member of any sort. But instead of a human, I was greeted by the sight of a horse. "What the hell are you?" I asked it as I looked around, making mental notes on where the shadows are so that I can hide when a situation calls for it.
"My name is Twilight Sparkle. I'm a unicorn and you still haven't answered my question." She said. "My name is James Earl Cash and I'm a human." I said. She had a purple and pink mane and her skin was purple. She seems to have stars tattooed by her flank. "Oh my…. What happened to you?" She asked, clearly shocked at my bruised state. "Lionel Starkweather did." "Ok, how about this, I'll take you back to my place and I'll heal you." She said. "Alright." I said.
As we were walking through the village, a lot of them were staring at me. "Hey, does everyone here has a tattoo on their flank?" I asked. "What? Oh these. They're called cutie marks. Everypony gets one when they discover their special talent." "Cutie marks? It sounds a bit weird though." I said.
When we reached her place, I was completely taken aback. It was a huge tree with windows and a balcony sticking out. She pulled out a key and I noticed that the key is enveloped in a pink aura, the same as her horn. When we stepped inside, I heard a voice say "What the?! What are you?". I looked around and saw a dragon. I quickly backed up against the wall. Then, she said "Don't worry. He's just a baby dragon. He won't harm you." "Ok. First, a weird name for a tattoo. Next, a baby dragon.." I said.
"Ok, just sit down here." I heard her say. "Alright." I said, walking towards the spot and sitting down. Then, I heard her walk towards me from behind. "Stay still." She said. Then, I felt a weird, indescribable feeling. After a while, I look at my body and saw that I have been completely healed. "Thank you." I said. But instead of an answer, I heard a loud gasp again. "County Jail?! You're an escaped convict?" She said. "Yes, I WAS an escaped convict. But all with the help of Starkweather. Until he tried to kill me. He made me participate in snuff films in exchange for my freedom." I said, immediately hearing a scream. "What the… That came from the door." I said. "It must be Pinkie Pie. I guess she must've saw you from the window. You better prepare yourself tonight as she is going to throw a party for you." She said "Party?" She's going to do that from me?" I said, shocked because another horse is going to throw a party for a completely unknown stranger. "Yes. She throws a party whenever somepony new moves into the village." She said, answering my question. "Oh, Ok." I said. "We might as well stay here till then." She said.
Then, after approximately four hours, we went out to the village and she took the lead. "Where am I? I never got to know about this location." I asked. "You're in Equestria. Ponyville, to be precise." She said. "Ok." I said. When we reached our destination, I realized that the party was going to be held at the particular building I saw earlier.
She told me to go inside as I was practically staring at the building for quite some time now. When I walked inside, a stream of confetti covered me instantly. "Welcome to Ponyville.I'mPinkiepiewhoareyouisitfunherehow'step arty….." I heard a voice say. I tracked the voice down to a pink horse. She had a pink mane that was all poofy and she had 3 balloons as a cutie mark. I putted my hand in her mouth, instantly stopping her from talking. "My name is James Earl Cash and I don't need a headache as soon as I arrive. And you must be Pinkie Pie." I said. I took my hand out of her mouth and she started talking again. But this it was slower than she originally talked. She introduced me to her friends. "This is Rainbow Dash, Rarity, Fluttershy, Applejack and Twilight Sparkle." She said. "You look weird. No offense." The one called Rainbow Dash said. "You're attire is outrageous. I know I'll just make a new shirt for you, darling." The one called Rarity said. "Howdy, ah'm Applejack. Good to meet ya." The one called Applejack said. "Um, hi." The one called Fluttershy said.
Then, trying to make things not awkward anymore, I suggested that we start the party. We partied till late night. Around 11 p.m. all the guests were leaving. That was when it hitted me, I have nowhere to stay. "You could at my place if you like." Twilight said, clearly noticing my troubles. "Thanks." I said. When we both arrived at her place, she took out a small mattress for me. "Thank you." I said. Before going to sleep, she started asking some questions. Some of them went like "How did you get here?" Do you miss your home?" Do you miss your family?" and those sorts. After that, she asked me one sensitive question, "How was your life back there?" I instantly flinched at that question. "It was living hell. I was on death row for years and when the fateful day arrived, I was suddenly freed by Starkweather and made to participate in snuff films in exchange for my freedom." I said, vividly remembering everything that has happened. "Ok. It must've been harsh for you." She said, with a pint of sympathy in her voice. "If you were in my shoes, then you'd know. Alright, enough talking. I'm going to bed. Good night." I said, covering myself with the blanket. "Good night." She said while yawning.
I woke up in the middle of the night as I heard a yell from outside. "Come out, Cash! I'm going to hunt you down like the dog you are! If you don't, I'll burn this village!" I recognized the voice as Ramirez's voice. "Oh no. This can't be good." I thought. Almost immediately, I walked to the kitchen and grabbed a plastic bag and leaped over a window. All while remaining in the shadows. I took a nearby can and through it right in front of me. And as I expected, he walked right up to my position. He looked at the shadows for a while and turned his back on me. "Wrong move, Ramirez." I thought, silently sneaking behind him. When I was right behind him, I slipped the bag onto his head and spun him around. Then, I punched him in the face for four times and snapped his neck. Twilight must've saw the whole thing as I saw her looking at me with a startled state. It took me quite a while to explain to her. I'm writing this journal so as to keep my sanity intact. I am writing this as I am preparing to sleep…..

Published 1970-01-01 00:00:00 UTC
Last updated 2015-08-12 22:30:35 UTC

A new resident