DOCTOR WHOOVES: SEASON 1

TWO

  “Health Inspectors Whooves and Do you say?” The train’s cook, Crème Brule, studied the very official-looking ID cards, finding nothing suspicious about them. “I’m sure you won’t find anything wrong with the Friendship Express though. She gets a thorough cleaning after every journey, and the chow is top-notch. I know that 'cause I'm the one who cooks it."

  Derpy looked quite pleased with herself. She locked eyes with Crème, hypnotizing him with her psychic power. “Health inspectors get free meals while on the job" she said in a calm, almost mesmerizing voice, "one order of fish and fancy fries, one order of vegetarian stew and bread please, oh and a pot of coffee.”

  Nodding, the cook slowly replied, “fish n’ fries, veggie stew and bread, coffee, coming right up.” He turned attention to cooking, while his customers took seats at one of the tables. Thankfully none of the other customers seemed to notice Crème acting strangely.

  “Clever girl” Sydney complimented, “I didn’t even think of using the psychic paper to get out of

paying. Still, if we’re going to be on this planet a while, it is vital that we find a legal way to make money. I don’t want to do something crazy like rob a bank.”

  Derpy draped a forehoof over her mouth in dramatic fashion, glaring evilly. “This is a stick-up by space pirate Dangerous Derpy Do! Hoof over all your mazumas or I’ll zap ya to dust, varmint!”

  “Oooh, are you playing space bandits? I love that game!” said somepony just out of sight. Derpy

and Sydney were, needless to say, quite startled.

  “Why hello there miss” Sydney greeted, turning to see a pink mare, wingless like himself, standing

behind him, “didn’t see you there.” Where the void had she come from? Derpy would have seen her first, being seated across from him. He held a hoof to his heart, willing it to slow down to normal speed. Well whatever the case, stranger things had happened.

  The new mare had a shock of darker pink hair on her head, and her eyes were blue and almost glowing with life and happiness. A symbol of three blue and yellow balloons adorned her flank, which to Time Ponies represented the middle and lower-class citizen. Gallopfreyans that graduated the academy all possessed hourglass symbols to represent their status as an official Time Lords or Ladies. The top portion would be filled with twelve stars, which represented regenerations. When a Time Pony changed, one of those stars would end up on in the bottom portion. Sydney and Derpy were still in their first incarnations.

  “Hi there, I’m Pinkamena Diane Pie” the sneaky mare stated, pulling a chair over and plopping herself down on it, “but you can just call me Pinkie Pie. Are you heading for Canterlot? My friends and I are on our way to attend a wedding.” She said all this very quickly, as though she was hopped up on sugar or caffeine. Neither Time Pony had of course ever heard of Canterlot.

  “Well that sounds like a smashing good time, don’t you think Derpy?" Sydney said cheerfully, "oh by the way I’m Sydney, and this is my fiancé Derpy. We hope to be married ourselves sometime in the near future.”

  Smiling kindly, Derpy added, “We’re just visiting your country for a while. Spot of trouble back home in Gallopfrey that we didn’t want to get caught up in. Nothing you would be interested in. Boring political stuff.”

  “Oh well that’s just awful!” Pinkie replied, hoping she herself never had to leave her kin and country behind, “well you are always welcome here in Equestria. I’ll show you around Canterlot after the wedding and introduce you to my friends. I might even be able to pull a few strings so you can attend. I’ve got connections high-up in the chain-of-command.”

  Derpy liked the idea of observing this planet’s customs. All the better to help blend in with the natives, avoid drawing unwanted attention to herself and Sydney, and perhaps even throw off any agents sent by the High Council.

  “We would be honored to attend the wedding as your guests, Ms. Pie” Sydney said politely, “Derpy and I ordered lunch, so how about you go and let your friends knows about us while we eat?”

  Pinkie hopped back off the stool, sliding it back under the table behind her. “Right-o. I’ll be back in a jiffy. That’s 0.01 seconds by the way.” She zipped away out of the dining car, somehow leaving bits of confetti behind in her wake.

  Crème soon delivered their food, and Derpy subtly released him from hypnosis. She and Sydney found their meals to be far better than expected. The couple ate in peaceful silence for a bit, until a group of mares and a small reptile entered the compartment. With them was a furiously struggling Pinkie, who was being restrained in a partial energy field of some sort.

  “That’s the two lying sneaks over there!” Pinkie shouted, pointing in the direction of the two now very nervous Time Ponies. The former stood to confront the Mane Seven, ready to arm himself with his sonic screwdriver in the event of attack.

  “What is the meaning of this, Pinkie?” Sydney demanded indignantly, ”what have we lied about? We told you only the truth!” His normally cheerful expression changed to an angry scowl, and his blue eyes seemed to darken to match his mood.

  “you told me that you and Derpy were from Gallopfrey, but there’s no such place in Equestria, or anywhere else on Equus!” Pinkie dashed over to him, pressing her muzzle into Sydney’s, growling like an angry dog, hooves gripping his suit collar, “so you lied to me. I hate false friendship more than anything!”

  “Wait...did you say Equus?” Sydney asked, hoping he didn't get punched, “this isn’t Earth?” He had forgotten the TARDIS data file stating that Earth’s dominant species were bipedal apes. A moment’s thought and he finally remembered. He facehoofed and let out a frustrated sigh at his spotty memory. Well at least he was on Equus. He could deliver the letter when the time came.

  “I’ve never heard of any location called Earth” Twilight stated, more curious than angry now, “are you and Derpy from a parallel universe or something? I’ve read about mysterious ponies from unknown places before, like the Foals of Wolfpit and the Stallion from Minotaured.” She hauled Pinkie back away from Sydney.

  Rainbow stepped in to add her two bits. She flared her wings to bar Pinkie from getting past to maul the object of her outrage. Though rarely seen, the pink mare's temper was a terrifying sight to behold.

  “We can discuss books later, egghead" Rainbow replied with a serious tone she rarely ever used, "right now, we need to figure out what to do with these two freighthoppers. If they are on the train illegally, we should turn them over to the conductor. Once that’s done I’m all for having a victory lunch.”

  “No time like the present” Sydney said resignedly, straightening his suit, “Derpy and I are not from a parallel universe. We are from the planet Gallopfrey, in the Constellation of Kasterborous. Basically we are extraterrestrial time-travelers. We fled from the heads of our houses, who did not wish Derpy and I to have a relationship, due to a long-standing feud between our families. If we ever return to Gallopfrey, it's likely that my fiancé and I will be separated or even executed.”

  The Mane Seven listened closely, feeling their anger quickly replaced by sympathy. Applejack sensed no dishonesty. She could not imagine the pain she would feel if her family turned on her over her choice of a special somepony. The farmer stepped forward, doffing her hat and holding it over her chest.

  “Mr. Whooves, I would like to formally apologize for my friend’s behavior” Applejack solemnly stated, “now that this misunderstanding has been resolved, how about we call a truce and get to know each other as friends?”

  Sydney and Derpy looked at each other for a few moments, before the latter turned to the Mane Seven with a benevolent smile on her face. She wasn’t the type of pony to hold grudges.

  “All is forgiven my friends” she replied, “let us sit and get to know each other better then, shall we?” Naturally, Murphy’s Law chose that time to rear its ugly head. A terrified scream erupted from Fluttershy, who had chosen to observe over by the door, incase she felt the urge to flee. Turning back to her, the group saw to their horror that some kind of creature had cornered her under a table. It did not escape notice either that Pinkie was missing.

  The pony-sized insectoid was covered in a shiny black-and-green carapace. The pupil-less eyes emitted a dim, icy blue light, and a jagged horn jutted from its forehead. Its mouth was full of razor-sharp teeth. With a raspy sort of laugh it swiped at Fluttershy, apparently toying with her, since it could easily drag the poor mare out.

  “Get away from her!” Twilight snarled, using a telekinetic field to grab and hurl the monster into the wall. It rebounded off and tackled her to the floor, trying to sink its long fangs into her neck. Unable to focus her magic long enough to blast her attacker off, she pounded her hooves against the incredibly tough carapace, hoping that being eaten was not how she would meet her end.

  "Get off my friend ya over-sized cockroach!" Applejack kicked the monster off of Twilight, sending it crashing through one of the tables. She pulled a coil of rope from inside her hat and deftly spun it over her head, catching the monster around the waist and wrapping the other end of the rope around her forelegs. She gave a mighty tug, intending to pull her quarry in for a beating.

  Instead what she got was pulled along for the ride as the monster extended a pair of gossamer wings and hovered into the air. Applejack only had time to say a quiet “oh horse apples” before the monster flew straight through one of the windows, pulling a screaming farmer along for the ride. Only her stetson remained to drift to the floor.

  To add a note of grim finality to the already terrifying situation, the Friendship Express started to slow down. With an ear-piercing screech of brakes, the train came to a sudden halt, throwing everypony onboard to the floor. Twilight and her friends looked up in time to see dark shapes zipping by the windows. With dawning horror, they realized that a swarm of the insect monsters now surrounded the train.

  “What in the hell is going on?” Rainbow demanded, magenta eyes burning with unbridled fury, “Whooves, if you know something I suggest you start talking right now! If those things hurt Applejack because you held back information, then I can’t be held responsible for what I’ll do to you!” She rose to her hooves, keeping one eye on the jagged hole in the roof of the dining car.

  Sydney was unafraid of the threat. He stood and walked over to the window, where one of the creatures clung to the outside, staring him down like a griffon would a freshly-cooked steak. “The creatures we’re dealing with are not of this world” he explained, “They are Vultus Amoveo, better known as changelings. Time Lord history records state that the species died out long ago, when my kind destroyed their homeworld. If there is a swarm roaming about, it almost certainly means that the changelings somehow survived. If a nest has been established somewhere in Equestria, then we have to quickly find it and destroy the queen. She’ll be the lynchpin of the nest, the one giving orders via psychic link. When she dies, all the drones go with her.”

  Fluttershy screamed as a changeling crashed through a window, swooping over her head before smashing through the opposite window. Everypony instinctively dropped to the floor to avoid being snatched. “N-normally I would protest harming precious creatures” the butter yellow Pegasi stated with growing anger in her voice, “but these monsters took our friend. If they’ve hurt her...or...or worse...I’ll...” She did not know she would do if she came to blows with a changeling. She was a mare of peace, not a fighter. For all she knew, The Stare might not even work on changelings.

  “I’m sorry, but right now there is nothing we can do for Applejack” Sydney stated, “she’ll almost certainly be kept alive though, so the changeling who captured her can maintain a psychic link, drawing on her memories and knowledge for better impersonation, as well as feed on emotions like fear. Destroy the right changeling, and the link will be broken.”

  The Mane Six turned pale at the thought of some beastly monster impersonating their friend, let alone feeding on her. Knowing that there was a chance of saving Applejack brought them at least a small modicum of hope that this day would have a happy ending.

  “What’s the plan Mr. Whooves?” Twilight asked, “I assume you have a way to combat the changelings?” She quickly rifled through all the spells she knew, trying to find ones capable of taking down a vicious shape-shifter. She did not very many offensive spells, having rarely needed to use them in dangerous situations. Fire or ice-based magic might be the most effective means of vanquishing an insect.

  Sydney replied, “as I said, we need to find the nest and the changeling queen. This train was heading for Canterlot, so I think we should start our search there. Large population centers are very attractive to such creatures.” His ears pricked up at the sound of multiple shattering windows and the terrified screams of ponies. Five changelings landed in a crouch a few feet away, looking eager to pounce on some fresh meat. A familiar lasso was still looped around its thorax.

  ‘Kill the changelings and Applejack will be freed from its control.’ Twilight charged up a Flame Strike spell and launched it at the changeling. It tried to dodge out of the way, but the fireball caught it in the side. With a screech of pain, the monstrous creature dropped to the floor, rolling around to try and put itself out. Twilight did not relent, firing another volley that reduced the changeling to a scorched husk.

  The dead monster’s kin were clearly not happy at the loss of their hatchmate, charging after Twilight with incredible speed, fangs bared and ready to sink into pony flesh. The librarian took off running, hoping her pursuers did not catch up.

  “Book it for the luggage car!” Derpy ordered, “We’ll be safe in the TARDIS!” She took off after Sydney, followed closely by the Mane Six. The changelings gave chase, smashing aside the door Twilight had the forethought to close behind her.

  "What the hell is a TARDIS?" Rainbow questioned, "sounds like some kind of insult against mentally-challenged ponies. If that's the case, I suggest you change it to something that doesn't piss me off!"

  "TARDIS is an acronym!" Derpy explained, ducking as a changeling crashed through a window and smashed through a compartment door, "it stands for Time and Relative Dimension in Space. To put it in laypony's terms, the TARDIS is a time machine."

  "Well that's just awesome!" Rainbow replied, kicking another changeling back out the window it had smashed open. The monster let out a pained screech and plummeted out of sight, probably to the unforgiving earth speeding below.

  Twilight thought up a plan and she thought it up quick. Her friends would not be able to outrun the changelings, and needed time to escape. She stopped and turned to face down the angry bugs. Charging her magic, she created a violet shield wall that filled the corridor. It would likely be able to hold back the swarm for at least a couple of minutes.

  “Twi, what are you doing?” Spike demanded, fearing for the safety of his big sister, “hurry up and follow us!” He started walking towards her to grab a hoof and pull her down the corridor.

  “Go on Spike” Twilight replied, “I’ll be fine. With luck the changelings will take me right to the queen for judgement, since I just torched one of her drones. I’m sure she’ll be very displeased. If I can find out where the nest is, I’ll try and send you and everypony else a message. Now run Spike. That's an order, and I know you won't disobey me!"

  Reluctantly, the baby dragon turned and hurried away. He made one last glance over his shoulder to see the barrier come down a moment later; Twilight was dogpiled by the changeling swarm. He was on the verge of going to help his sister when a blue magic field surrounded him. He was pulled into the luggage car.

  "Rarity, let me go!" Spike cried, struggling with all his might against Rarity's telekinetic grip, but it was far too strong, "how could you just leave your best friend, my sister, behind? I hate you!"

  "Hate me if you must Spike" Rarity replied sternly, "but know that if we go back and try to help her, then all of those changelings will overwhelm and capture us, and Twilight's brave sacrifice will have been for nothing. We must soldier on and find the changeling nest. Find it and destroy it. If Twilight is taken there, then she will be freed at that point in time. For now we must be strong."

  Spike's stony silence was more powerful than any words. The meaning was clear: if Twilight perished, he would never forgive Rarity or any of the others. Whatever friendship that existed between them would be gone forever. Dragons held fast to grudges, and they lived a very, very long time.

  Rarity carried Spike into the TARDIS and closed the door behind her. Once she set him down, he curled up in a corner and refused to look at or speak to anypony. The remaining three ponies of the Mane Seven wiped away their tears and watched Sydney and Derpy locate and set the coordinates for Canterlot.

  "The changelings are going to pay for what they've done" Rainbow growled, "let's go and kick that changeling queen's sorry ass for Twilight, Applejack, Pinkie, and all the other ponies they've hurt!" Gathering in a circle, the determined heroines placed their hooves together.

To their surprise, a scaly hand joined in. "For Twilight most of all!" Spike echoed, "I swear on the Ancient Dragon Code that I'll save her, no matter what it takes."

  With their resolve turned hard as steel, the ponies set to work on a battle plan.