Lost In Equestria

by Lord Midnight

Rating: teen
Tags: Shining Armor, Gore, Princess Celestia, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, Dark, Alternate Universe, Human, Sad, Main 6, Romance, Princess Luna, Princess Cadance
Length: 28027

Cat was once a noble of a futuristic post apocalypse earth, now he is lost in a land of ponies and magick and seeks a way home.

My name is Katdestro Ironheart, feel free to call me Cat but for the love of Death if you call me Kitty I will hunt you down and strangle you with your intestines. I was stolen from my world by an ancient evil that wishes to use my martial arts skills and magical resistance for his own twisted goals. I refused and allied myself with the creatures of this world, the ponies and their alicorn leaders. I adapt to this world and continue to live by my code of honor, but all I want is to go home. If I must hunt down the one responsible and turn into a monster to do so I will. My world is worth it, Shady is worth it.

Published 2015-08-16 03:00:02 UTC
Last updated 2016-01-21 15:01:48 UTC

Prologue

My name is Katdestro Ironheart, feel free to call me Cat but for the love of Death if you call me Kitty I will hunt you down and strangle you with your intestines. I don’t care that Twilight is only keeping this portal open long enough to send this story through, I’ll find a way. Now that introductions are out of the way, allow me to explain what this book you hold in your hands is. You see I come from your world, maybe not your time period because of the way time moves between points in the omniverse. When I left earth it was the year 2706, I was a 17 year old warrior of the noble house of Ironheart. This is the true story behind my disappearance, where I went, what I did, why I never returned. By Celestia I hope this doesn’t end up in the 1800s or something stupid like that. Or worse lodged inside a dinosaur's mouth being ruined.

This is going to sound ridiculous, however assuming the spell works right this book is literally going to be appearing out of thin air in a flash of fire, so theres that added credibility. Before I begin and tell my story, I have a few points to drive home to you. First, yes it’s a land of magical talking adorable ponies, get over yourself. It’s also a world of dragons, adventure and to be perfectly honest, far better a place than Earth ever was.

Secondly I feel I need to explain who I am better, how I do the things I do, and why. If all went right this is around the year 2506 and your the current head of the Ironheart clan, I bid thee an honorable greetings and 200 years of greatness. Just stick this book in a vault to be opened after I disappear. Most likely, Twi missed and your some computer age idiot who has no idea what ki is, much less sai and doa or anything about combat. So let’s explain how your body would work if you didn’t destroy a majority of your power with chemicals and laziness.

Ki is the energy of the spirit, it flows in your every action and holds great power. Sai(pronounced say) is the ki of the mind. It is great for defense and manipulation. Masters of sai can sense everything around them, manipulate anything they touch and heal. It is fueled by focus and meditation, using it requires a calm mind. Doa(pronounced doe) is the ki of the heart. It is best for strength and resilience. Masters of doa can boost the strength of their bodies tenfold, withstand immense damage and inflict damage without contact. It is fueled by will and emotions, using it requires passion.

Most people fall into types, preferring to use one or the other. In fact using both at the same time requires a heart filled with emotions and an iron will directed by a calm mind undisturbed by emotion and completely focused. In history there have been five known duel masters and less than 100 people who mastered one and reached adept in the other. Then again even in our world that prizes martial arts and ki above all else there are less than 5000 known masters in the entire world.

Now for me, I’ll be using my practical levels as of my last certified test, back when I was still on Earth. I have a great gift, possessing the talents required to become a duel master. The road to mastery is long and hazardous, Disciple, junior adept, adept, elite, junior master, master, elder master and grand master. In my 17 years on this earth I have lived for the fight and reached the rank of elite. My clan’s honor demands that I exist as the incarnation of Death Himself. My skill with weapons is on the level of a master, my skill hand to hand overall is adept. My sai is on the level of an elite or junior master, my doa… well I’m trying ok? It’s not my fault I lack passion for fighting. I have plenty of passion, once when our clan came under attack and they destroyed a part of our garden we discovered that when my fires are lit I’m a master of doa. Practical levels are what I’m using so, my skill in doa is junior adept.

I fight primarily using my favorite battle gear. I wear a tartarite weaved cloth shirt and leggings under my outerwear, it’s equal to thick chain mail, but comfortable, lightweight and most importantly, good at heat regulation. outside of that is my various harnesses, straps and sheaths holding my personal armory. A scorpion chain on my right arm, ten throwing knifes on my left arm, a set of bags containing things like shuriken and bombs on my chest, a metal expanding staff on my back and a small tool kit divided between my legs. Outside of that I wear a concealing dogi that hides all of that to enable the element of surprise with my weapons. It is black and has silver markings identifying me as an Ironheart. Outside of that I wear my swords on my back. They are designed for the sun-moon style. One long the other short.

One of the nice things about being a noble with my birthing. I get nice birthday presents. Most of my gear is tartarite, a special and highly secret alloy that makes items that never wears out, never get dull and hold an edge that can slice a piece of paper under its own weight. It can be very expensive and is only available to noble families. Tartarite is common however in its own way. A sword forged is a sword that will pass down to a descendent. Once the metal is shaped and whatever else they do to it, it becomes a fixed object in reality. The result is that most nobles have tartarite gear and weapons.

As for me myself, I’m decently tall, scarred, muscular and have short blond hair and green eyes. A pretty normal looking guy, were it not for the swords on my back and the status of my clan, no one would look twice at me. I love reading, gardening and playing games. A group of hobbies that get me in a lot of trouble from Elder. He once decided to punish my demeaning ways by sending a group of my clansmen to my garden to destroy it as a punishment for skipping my lesson. I dragged there unconscious forms to him and informed him that he has to send someone capable of killing me, because otherwise they’ll just die. He stopped underhanded tactics after that and started using more traditional punishments, much to my horror.

I think he forgets that the greatest warrior of all time, The Grand Duel Master Emeris, was a nerd and a gamer. After all he designed the nanoborgs that brought the world to its knees himself. He proclaimed it to be the beginning of a new age, the age of the phoenix. His nanoborgs were cybernetic viruses that destroyed fossil fuels, gunpowder and many other things. His hacker core launched a simultaneous attack that deactivated all the nuclear systems and sent the satellites in orbit around the planet out into space. With 90% of technology destroyed he led the global assault himself, replacing all the governments with his own semi-feudal systems. He preached about how lack of discrimination with technology was destroying our planet and the old technologies must be swept away to allow the new ones.

It’s a pity that something went wrong in his plan. His laboratory where he had everything needed to create the new technological age was attacked, and after a bloody battle lasting weeks he was defeated, stabbed in the back by his own son. Though chaos reigned in the world after that, the new government stayed strong, after all it was designed like this for a reason. But enough with the history lesson and my personal issues about being a warrior that hates fighting. Lets get to my purpose here, my epic adventures in the magical land of Equestria. No, magic isn’t a metaphor, I mean actual magic, like making things out of nothing, songs that just happen and other wonderful things.

“Twi, you can start the total recall spell now, you are sure this won’t fry my brain right?”

“Umm… sure.”

“Did you just lie to me? Wait! Maybe we should-”

Author's Note

So begins my latest story. I have not an editor presently, so I have edited this to the best of my own ability. Katdestro has been an idea of mine for a while, hope you enjoy my Equestria and the glimpses of my alternate reality post apocalypse Earth. I'll prolly write an actual story in that universe eventually.

Chapter 1

I crawl along the rooftop silently, there are guards posted everywhere and they might know I’m attempting to escape. They know my patterns and I’m a single whistle away from being hot-dropped by 6 master class warriors ready to capture me and drag me off to Elder. My route has been planned for a week, every little change in the schedule and ministrations of the clan’s estate has altered my route. I must escape, and I absolutely must not be fallowed. If I’m caught on the estate I’m screwed, I can’t escape one master class, much less all six and Elder.

I reach the end of the houses and leap down giving the guard a nod. He’s a friend that I managed to get on my side. All it took was to put the fear of Cat into him then treat him as a friend. I move alongside him posing as a guard using his patrol to get close to the wall. Getting in range, I Step away from my friend to the base of the wall. Flicking my right arm my scorpion chain launches from my hand and the hook catches the edge of the wall letting me haul myself over as quickly as possible. I drop to the ground and press myself tightly into the shadows at the base of the wall.

I’m off the estate but I’m not in the clear yet. I must get out tonight, Damn the punishments and obstacles, I will succeed. I Step across the street and take off running south as fast as I can. The masters won't pursue me once I make it out of the estate’s zone, they are above such antics and encountering unfriendly faces reaches a whole new perspective if they are involved. At best none know I’ve even left my room, at worst Asmodeus is hiding in my shadow behind me waiting for me to meet his eyes so he can launch a surprise doa attack and capture me.

I Step towards a wall and rebound off it landing on the roof above it and turning into a spin kick that will surprise Asmodeus if he is following me. As my foot connects with his side and he grunts and lands into an awkward roll facing me I smirk at his surprised look.

“You didn’t even check your shadows, how didja know I was there?” He growls at me rubbing his side waiting to see how I’m going to handle this.

“Always assume the worst possible outcome and be pleasantly surprised. I’m not gonna stop, even if I hafta leave you here unconscious in Werewolf territory.”

“Theres no such thing as werewolves.”

I facepalm. “You know, that new gang that formed. They operate out of this area, you would fetch them a pretty penny if they caught you. Anyways, attack or walk away. You have until I draw to decide.” I slowly slip my hands upwards to the handles of my swords. I watch with amusement as his face looks conflicted as I slowly and agonizingly draw my blades bearing down on him with my ki pressure. His ki is equal to mine, however when the two are combined it feels a lot stronger than it is. Not to mention the fact that my doa is active at all is enough to give even a junior master who knows what it does to me second thoughts.

“How important is what you are doing tonight to you?” He blurts out quickly looking relieved when my hands stop.

“The M6 of the gaming world and I have several major rare seed importers meeting me there.” I hesitate and a small smile spills across my face. “Also, there's this girl and-”

A look of panic flashes across his face. “I’m out.” He Flashes away in absolute silence. Perfect, even if I wound him I can’t guarantee he doesn’t follow me. His stealth skills are unmatched and his practical combat skills outclass mine by a lot. He is a junior master tier in both unarmed and weapons. Unfortunately for him, tonight isn’t a practical setting and he knows it. I probably would have killed him before I lost my chance to go to GameCon and get my hands on bulbs for the Midnight Lotus. The plant that was the symbol of the Midnight Lotus clan as a result if it being headed by the great Emeris.

It is a breed of lotus created by Emeris, it blooms at midnight then drops its petals only to regrow them and repeat the process once a week. This is symbolic of the secret technique, the Midnight Lotus. They are remarkable plants, virtually unkillable but almost impossible to grow. They require the perfect garden, one with ki flow in the air and love in the soil. The only known place that can even grow them well enough to sell them is a side branch of the Midnight Lotus clan itself. Tonight is going to be expensive, but so worth it.

Satisfied in my escape I turn and head northwest. I headed south in case of pursuit and I need to move fast in order to make it there in time for the opening. The rest of the trip is uneventful, I simply run through the streets as fast as I can ignoring any gangs or beggars that are too dumb to not get in my way at the sight of the Ironheart symbol on my dogi and the swords on my back.

I should explain how the world works at this point, just in case I’m coming across as arrogant or uncaring. The world is rather like feudal japan, except wars are settled on a scale of no more than ten warriors a side and rarely have more than four total casualties. The clan Midnight Lotus stands at the top of the world. They are the descendants of Emeris and possess immense technology and influence as well as many secret techniques passed down by Emeris. The ruler of the clan is considered the king of the world. They exist to make sure that the noble houses follow the rules.

Usually, in life you have a few options. Accept your lot in life as a citizen, go to work where you want, get money, have a family and sire descendants, retire and eventually die. Or you can become a warrior, join a gang and try to become a recognised clan, join a clan and rise through the ranks and become a blooded member, join a guild or covenant. You can even become a professional gamer or do something with technology becoming known worldwide for your achievements. Their are so many ways to earn a living that their are even jobs for people with no arms, legs or other disabilities. So many opportunities and choices depending on what you want and are willing to do. Unfortunately I’m a noble.

The Noble clans are allways warriors, both because of being trained from birth and because we are all descendants of the Altered Ones that fought by Emeris’ side. Birthright is important. I am the first son of my father who was the first son of Elder, that alone means that I must become a great warrior for our clan and will be pushed to succeed. My mother however, she was a direct descendant of Grandmaster Emeris. His blood, the blood that made the Midnight Lotus clan so powerful, flows in my veins. Asmodeus, Acheron and myself are the only children of theirs.

I hope they figure out how unsuited I am to lead and just put Acheron in charge. He is my youngest brother, yet at the age of 14 he’s wiser, smarter and an overall better man than I am. Did I mention he also possesses an aptitude for dual mastery and actually enjoys fighting enough to use it, yet never deals more damage to an opponent than needed? To date I have only heard of him killing a single opponent, a rapist he hunted down and… well lets just leave it at hell must have seemed like heaven after what he did. Theres a reason rape is such a rare crime, rapist lose all rights as human beings and are regarded as scum even worse than blood traitors.

Honestly he’s a perfect head of the house, I think when I get home I’m declaring my support of him as heir. The gaming hall comes into view along with something unfortunate. I land in front of Elder and bow. Theres no point trying to slip past him, I can only attempt to convince him to allow me to go. I’m praying to Death that Elder decides to use the threat and entice approach. As opposed to the knock me out and I wake up in front of two tons of potatoes with nothing but a wooden spoon to peel them with approach. Yes it happened and if this worked right and you're reading this Elder, screw you. That sucked and I smelled like starch for weeks. I get that I risked causing a war by going to that VD&D multiverse clash in Dragonheart territory, but it was still excessive because we could have won anyways. Seriously, I could have taken those six wimps myself and if I had Daos and Archie we could do it without a so much as a single scratch on either side.

Elder looks down at me with a stern look. I feel his doa driving into me from his piercing gaze and gulp. I’m scared of three things in this world. Schetzle bugs(picture a massive flying spider that can shoot web goo 15 feet away and makes a hellish screeching sound laced with the ki it’s capable of using), Valkyrie (she’s my mother’s youngest sister and has a crush on me, a creepy, incestual, caught her stalking me a few times, kind of crush. Honestly I wish she was at least just a cousin, at least that isn’t as bad. She’s 25, hot and we have a lot in common, so don’t judge me.) but worst of all is Elder. He is a grand master with power beyond my ability to even comprehend it. You know those times in games where you see someone whose level is just Lvl. ??, it’s like that except it reads Lvl. OGW?!.

His voice sounds tired, we have been down this road so many times that it’s almost getting routine. “Is going to this really proper etiquette for the heir of a noble house, one with the blood of the Lotus in their veins?”

“Hmm, relatively. In the spirit of modern decorum, no. That is exactly why I’m here, and the rightful heir is back home undergoing the infamous one sense dungeon. In the spirit of the one whose blood makes the Midnight Lotus great, then aye. After all Grandmaster Emeris loved gaming and gardening. He even created the game I’m here to play himself. So in short, in the spirit of the modern times no, in the spirit of our ancestors, it would be a travesty to miss it.” Rolled for charisma, calculating speech check.

“Do you understand what you are saying, making a declaration like that to your Elder? This is tantamount to pledging your blade to young Acheron.”

I nod. “I know when I am bested, Elder. He’s a better man than I am and holds a lot of promise for the future of our clan. I need to ask him how he feels about it first though, before I support him for something he would hate.”

He laughs. Speech check passed, entry to Gamecon now open. “Alright then, I can accept this answer. Now normally I would levy a few threats to gauge just how much you want to go to this thing, however I can tell your passion from the fact that your doa is actually at it’s proper potential and withstanding my gaze. So how about we get down to the end. Emeris was a warrior first, a gamer second and only became a gardener later in his life as he sought inner peace after the deaths his revolution and chaos his inventions wrought.”

I cut him off, an extreme rarity for me to the point he actually quiets down and listens to me calmly as my words drip with venom. “Grampa, ya think I love gardenin’ because the plants are such good conversationalists? I’m not like the rest ah ya, I find no joy in killin’, only pain. Bein’ able ta create life, ta help it to flourish and grow. That’s all that’s keepin’ me sane, do ya remember the night I first built the garden? How I had ta wash da blood I got over everythin’ I set up that night the next day? How I attacked any who drew near to me? Does that sound like I started gardenin’ because it pisses ya off?” I calm down a little as my emotions settle.

“I started gardening because I knew it helped Emeris in his time of sorrow. I was desperate to make the pain stop, to get rid of the faces haunting me. I found that it helped, so I let my passions consume me. I know that even though I am but an instrument of destruction, there is still a part of me that maintains its humanity. I know that beneath this Altered body is a gentle soul that just spent 3000 coins to acquire a Midnight Lotus. I know that within my mind that's treats every situation as a potentially hostile scenario and automatically calculates how best to kill everyone around me at every given moment is a gamer that just wants to play games and nerd out.”

He stares at me and I think I see a hint of shock beneath his nearly perfect poker face. It cracks and in a rare moment I see my grandfather's real face behind the mask of the Elder. Concern, sympathy, shock and pride are etched into his face. “This is… why haven't you ever told me this before, Kitty?” He pulls me into a hug and gives me a smile. “You honestly managed to acquire the holy flower? They say that only the inheritors of Emeris’ spirit can make them live.”

“I have a secret weapon. Did I ever tell you I explored the ruins of the Laboratory in my youth?”

He looks at me sternly. “You are in your youth, when was this, last week? Actually no, you went into the Laboratory and came out alive? How exactly did you manage? Very few ever get inside, and none have ever come back out alive.”

I smirk. “It was a month ago actually. Emeris was a gamer, after I passed through the genrecog gate I found myself in a VD&D style dungeon brought to life. Like I had to put on gear and fill out a character sheet and everything. There was even a giant mechanical dragon at the end that took forever to kill but never stopped being interesting because of its varying style and abilities.”

“Just how far did you get?”

“All the way, he had a vault at the end. It was a gift for his descendants that had followed in his footsteps. It turns out that he knew that what happened was a possibility and left all this behind for future generations. Inside was a beautiful pair of swords, designed for the sun moon style and unmatched by any I’ve ever seen. There was also a full body suit of tartarite woven cloth, the real stuff not that modern imitation. There was also several books and a case I can’t figure out how to open labeled ‘Who are the Elements of Harmony.’ I tried inputting the whole honesty, loyalty, generosity thing in the six input slots, but nothing happened. It just flashed up the words ‘Who, not what.’ I’m gonna finish reading the books later and maybe see if I can find anything in the lab itself later. I’ve got a key card and have been added to the system now, so I can explore at my leisure.”

His eyes shoot to the new swords that he hadn’t questioned before. I barely see the blur of his hands as they leave my sheaths. He stares at them in shock. “Do you even know what you are walking around with Katdestro?”

I nod. “From the level of craftsmanship and the logo I’m guessing they were forged by Emeris himself with the secrets of metal and a shard of his soul.”

He shakes his head and I feel sad. He hold the blades in front of my showing my the inscriptions on the hilts beneath the caps. ‘Luna’ on the moon sword and ‘Celestia’ on the sun sword. “These are blades forged by his master, Katdestro, your namesake. They were his ultimate working and it is said that rather than a shard of his soul he took what was left of his heart and forged that into the blades. Kat these are The Sun Moon blades. These are Emeris’ personal weapons. They are as unmarked and perfect as the day they were forged despite the thousands of battles they partook in. I do not know what is inside that box, but once you open it I don’t doubt it will change the world.”

I take the blades back reverently and slip them into their sheaths. Celestia and Luna, an odd naming for a pair of sun moon swords. Seriously if he’s just going to name them Sun Moon, why not just name them Solar and Titan? Why the lesser used female variants? I smile, it does feel oddly fitting, there is something almost feminine about the blades. The sun blade has gold decorations and whispers of life and light, while the moon blade had silver decorations and whispers of quiet and darkness. They have a regal bearing and I love them even more now that I know what they are.

“Now, I suppose you have things to do, and I have a rogue grandson to pretend to be hunting for, once you get inside even I can’t touch you, after all not only is it forbidden, once inside Lotus territory you outrank me. So perhaps I just arrived too late?”

“Meh, just tell em the truth. You found me and remembered how fleeting youth is. Just don’t mention what I told you about gaming and gardening please.”

“I must admit, I respect how much you hate even white lies.”

“There are no white lies, the concept of a white lie is simply a lie we tell to ourselves to make us better liars, but you're right it’s starting and I have people to meet and conceptual asses to kick with metaphorical magic.”

I head off into the convention. I must admit I get quite a few turned heads and strange looks. A security guard comes over to me. He looks very tense.

“I’m sorry sir, but this convention is for gamers only. You can punish whoever escaped when they come home, however, you hold no jurisdiction here by order of the house of the Midnight Lotus.”

“Relax, I am a gamer. Let me tell you I almost didn’t make it. Well to be honest I didn’t make it but in the end Elder decided to allow me to come inside after a heart to heart. Now if you’ll excuse me I’ve got some friends to check up on. I swear if they haven't managed to reach our goal yet I’m gonna to be annoyed. I managed to hit 60 on my main and 53 on my alt, while enduring training and missions beyond their comprehension.”

He relaxes. “You're going into the VD&D battleground arena? Can I see your cards?”

I look him over, he seems like a legit guard, but he might have been bribed.

“Lol, no. Not saying I don’t trust you but gaming is a competitive world and I have many rivals who would love for me to die in this event. Were playing looting rules after the prelims with an incompetent angel clause. If you die you lose all your gear to the survivors and get res’ed after the match with half your level and the Curse of the Incompetent Angel that can only be gotten rid of by either complete the Black Gate dungeon, or winning ten consecutive scenarios without dieing.”

He smiles and this time it reaches his eyes. “Very well, have fun. Wait, are those swords real? I’m going to need to hold on to them for you until morning.”

I sigh I’m not letting some incompetent guard touch them. “Are you even worthy to handle them?”

He looks at me annoyed. “I get your a noble, but just because they're expensive doesn’t mean anything. Just what great deeds have they done to require worthiness?”

I slip them out of there sheaths and hold them up so he can see Emeris’ mark inscribed on the base of the blades. He eyes boggle on seeing the mark. “They forged your entire world. I’ll only surrender these blades to grandpa Set.”

He shrinks back in realization. Here, in Lotus territory, I am a prince in my castle. “I’m sorry sir, I wasn’t aware any of the house of Midnight Lotus were in attendance tonight. Wait, I’ve heard of you! The Prince of Cats! Ohmygosh! You’re the one who-”

I sheath the blades and cut him off sighing at the title I hate. To me the tittle is simply a reminder of the worst week of my life. “I’m just Cat tonight bro. Gaming isn’t a hobby suited to an heir of a noble house after all.”

He nods overenthusiastically and pulls out a pass cover from his back pocket that he fits over my pass. Exactly as I was hoping he pulls out the black pass with the Lotus insignia on it. Where normal guests here are categorized under Gamer, Merchant, Visitor, Guest and VIP, and ultimately DND, this signifies do not disturb. I thank him for the DND badge and head off to find my friends. They managed not only to meet my expectations, but have passed them. For once we are all around the same level, even Johnny who was only at level 30 last time I saw him. We explore the convention together shopping and make our way over to a section of limited edition scenarios.

One smile and a flash of my pass later the six of us sit down at the Virtual Dungeons and Dragons table. I plug my main into my slot and say “Honesty.”

“Loyalty” Bolt activates his card with his typical rogue grin. He runs his hands through his bright blue messy hair, not for the first time I look at the roots of his hair and wonder if he’s telling the truth about it being his natural color or if he is really good at dyeing it.

“Generosity” Susannah is calm, between her natural regal attitude and beauty sometimes I wonder if she’s going to end up marrying into a noble family.

“K-kindness” Shady is looking at us through the curtain of raven hair. She’s cute, short, lithe and shy. It was thanks to her that I even have friends, yet I can still count the number of times she’s met my eyes on my hands. It’s a bit of a pity, she has such gorgeous blue eyes that have something deep inside that draw you into their depths.

“Giggling! I mean Laughter!” Johnny is our groups relatively newest member and we quickly figured out he’s got a few screws loose, a couple replaced with silly putty too.

“Magic.” Donavon closes the book he was reading with a snap and speaks to finish the ritual to activate the game and it begins.

Chapter 2

The map is challenging and has 30 side quests alongside the 300 outcome main questline. We picked this scenario because of the sheer edge it can give you if you can manage to beat it. There’s even a rumor that there’s a hidden side quest inside the everfree forest. Basically it goes like this, Emeris, the inventor of VD&D, was secretly obsessed with a television show and made a lot of hidden references to it. What the show is or even if it’s true is a mystery, however this map was his personal brainchild and possibly the proof. There are a lot of things you find in the map that seem to be a reference something.

We are in the middle of a side quest and find a cave, outside is a sign written in runes. ‘All the cake you can carry awaits those who can complete all the tasks.’ We smile at the thought. Cake has an immensely high selling value, however it lacks a crafting option and has no known way to acquire it. If we can fill our inventories with cake and make it back to the town to sell and store it, we’ll be rich. However, it might sidetrack us for too long to get all the side quests done before it’s time to go to the prelims.

All the players get a bonus ability based on the virtue they represent. Mine is lie detection. I can detect any lie when it’s active for example. Donovan gets major bonuses to all things magic that scales based on party member proximity. If we are all in the same room and in connected squares he has double all traits, however when he is alone he gets debuffs. We turn to Johnny, as the element of laughter he has a random, nonsensical form of esp.

He activates his ability and turns to me. “This cave makes me feel all tingly, like the feeling I get when I try walking on a carpet, but it turns out to really be made of spiders. I think The Element of Honesty should be asked.”

Why didn’t I think of that? I look at the sign and activate my ability. The text reader glitches for a moment and I see ‘The cake’s a lie’ written in blood on a strange white wall. Then it goes back to normal and with its normal text states. “The lies leave a bad taste in my mouth.”

We continue walking happy we avoided a potential death trap, with me slightly disturbed. That had to be a reference to something. It looked like a clip of something. This game is going to have me thinking about this again. I’m not going to be able to sleep for a few days…

We continue on our epic questing and manage to get some epic loot. A necklace that can only be equipped by the element of Kindness, but locks that person into that element forever. Shady smiles softly and equips it, she really is the only one who never fails hidden kindness checks. It has some serious stat boosts for her and we feel victory becoming a lot less of a hope and much more of a possibility.

After a few more side quests we find a necklace that has the same deal for Honesty. I equip it without hesitation. We slowly collect them all, one for each of us, and finish all the side quests. We are running short on time and we all know that the final boss on this game is nearly unbeatable and takes a long time to even attempt it. We have to decide to find out if the rumors of the hidden everfree quest is true, or go on into the final dungeon of the main quest.

“The rumors do have some feeling of truth to em. Honestly, it feels like this scenario is just loaded with references that this game is too old for us to get.”

“Could you imagine if we were the ones that actually found it? That’s absolutely bragging rights there.”

“They both sound fun!”

“I’m fine with whatever everyone else wants to do.”

“But if we can’t beat it in time then we won’t get the loot from this scenario until we come back and finish it.”

“Lets go check the locals again, ask about something strange in the Everfree.”

We check and turn up nothing. However our house to house search yields a library and we all groan as Donovan whoops in victory. He begins attacking the library using his autoloot spell to grab every single book from every single bookshelf.

“Ohh I found some awesome books on magic. I got new spells! I can turn lesser enemies into oranges! Ohh there a book called the Elements of Harmony and this map just had a bunch of stuff aimed at the element abilities that rewarded us with element locking epic equips, not suspicious at all. Woah it’s a reading book!.”

We actually turn to him in surprise at this, reading books are books that you keep in your inv and instead of taking time to absorb the info and giving you the result of your reading, you actually read them. They are good because they are rare and always have a secret in them. Telling you a boss’s secret ult and secret weakness for example, or telling you to jump in place on a certain spot to prompt a dig for treasure action that gets epic loot.

“Your careful study of the book yields information. The Elements of harmony hold the key to wielding the immense power of friendship and virtues. There last know location was the ancient abandoned castle in the Everfree forest.”

“Holy shit. The rumor is true, so why hasn’t anyone beaten it yet?” I remark to my friends. We all look at each other worriedly and start pulling out out best gear and making sure our ults are usable. Within a moment we are standing at the edge of the Everfree. It has no quests that take you there and is spoken about in fear and warnings. Literally at several points in the main questline the phrase ‘at least it’s not the Everfree’ was said in encouragement. We step inside and the map loads.

As we travel with reach a cliff and begin trying to figure out how to get past it. I receive a notification, if you jump off the cliff everything will be fine. Smiling I tell everyone about the notification and we head back to the edge of the cliff. This time there is strange being there. They insist that I am lying and will receive 500,000 gold if I convince them to jump.

I receive another notification. ‘You receive a telepathic message. - Tell them it was a lie and I will grant everyone in your party 100,000 gold and tell them that this part of the game is unfinished.’

Annoyed at this I attack the stranger. “They want me to lie and agree with them in order to get rid of us, I say we smash him.”

They teleport away as I get in range for my attack. With that we leap off the cliff as one, only for it to turn out to be about a foot down. I get a notification for honesty check passed. We continue down the path, Shady convinces us to not attack a Nightmare Manticore boss and manages to use her kindness ability to convince it to leave.

Next is actually strange, a massive amount of Nightmare Trees. I unleash my ult, one thousand daggers of light. It hits them all for one out of there 5k hp. Johnny just smiles and laughs.

“It could be worse, at least they aren't Nightmare rocks. It’s perfectly acceptable to be beaten by a tree, but beaten by a rock? None of us even have scissors!”

I laugh, despite the situation I can’t help it. “Sometimes I wonder if all your trains of thought can teleport.”

He just beams at me. “Actually I don’t have trains of thought, I use bumper cars! Way more fun than taking the train.”

We all laugh and I trail off when I hear Shady’s soft giggle. Such a beautiful sound, some day I’m going to tell her exactly how I feel about her. I notice all the trees taking massive damage randomly.

“Who just did what? All the trees just took a third of their hp in damage.” I look around questioningly.

“Maybe there just allergic to laughter, I remember Lord Emeris used to say giggle at the ghosties a lot, maybe this is a reference to that.”

Johnny just beams at us. “Leave it to me then! What’s the square root of infinity?”

We look at him confused, but he whips a potato out of his pocket. “Triangle!”

With a soft bemused chuckle I ask him “so why did you pull out a potato?”

“I have no idea! Should I have pulled out a tomato? I have one of them too!” He whips out a sock puppet.

Slowly we break out into laughter at the infectious insanity that is Johnny and the trees crumble to dust before the hilarity. Still laughing we continue on. We come across a wide river and unfortunately we only have one boat, only one of us can continue on from here. There’s an old man by the river. He tells us that if he doesn’t get this medicine across the river and treat his family, they will all die. Much to our chagrin Suzanna immediately hands over our only boat.

The man thanks her and when he places the boat in the water it transforms into a bridge. Soon we reach a chasm and Bolt uses his druid’s bird form to fly across and activate the bridge. Right before he fixes the bridge he smirks at us. “These idiots think I’m just going to abandon you for a 50 level boost applied to my character directly.”

After we cross the bridge we quickly reach the castle. Inside we find a boss. It’s a powerful necromancer named Nightmare Moon, the strange part is what is it doing here? It should be at the end of the dungeon for the main questline. It fires off a spell and all our element abilities are blanked out.

“You’d do better to just walk away while you can. The elements of harmony are shattered. Can you even begin to claim the Element of Magic when you're insignificant before my power?”

“Battle formation, it doesn’t matter if we don’t get boosts for it any more. We are stronger together! Trust me guys, the Elements are more than just some minor abilities we get. They are the building blocks of friendship. We wouldn’t have even made it here to this fight without them. We can win. Magic.” Donovan always was a great party leader, when all seems lost he holds us together.

I move next to him and smile. “That’s the truth, Honesty.”

“I’ve always got my friends back, Loyalty.”

“I’ll keep everyone alive, even if you um… die. Kindness.” She is so cute.

“Keep smiling everyone! Laughter!”

“I’ll take tank position, Generosity.”

With all of us in formation something interesting happens. The necklaces we found earlier all change into a different one and we all receive notifications. “Send power to the Element of magic? I’ll click yes.”

I receive a 100% damage resistance as all my mana and half my hp disappears. Donovan smiles as he receives the massive boosts. “Lights out, Moon.” He fires a spell that slices the necromancer a new one, rending it into dust. We smile at each other. We won! We found and beat the hidden quest line. “So wheres the loot?” I ask.

“What, these beautiful artifacts don’t count? We have a whole new epic ability and massive stat boosts. These are beyond legendary gear, Cat. I think that’s pretty good loot for a side quest.” Suzanna scolds me and I feel a moment of chagrin.

We are about to leave when the mayor’s NPC appears in here and the exit gets deleted. Right we just beat the main boss, things will glitch out if we head back into town. We turn in the quests and the scenario ends. We are so gonna win this tournament in… Five Minutes!

“We need to get going now! We are going to be late!”

They take off running and I know Shady can’t keep up, she never runs and says she can’t. I turn and smile at her. “Ever wanted to see the world through my eyes?”

She looks at me questioningly and squeaks when I scoop her up in my arms. She looks at me with wide eyes and shrieks, clinging to me for dear life when I Step. The world comes into crystal clarity as I streak to the staging area. Still holding onto Shady with her clinging to me with a surprising amount of strength I smirk as the others get there.

“So slow, I had time to skip out for some coffee if I could detach Shady, or particularly wanted to.”

“Cat?” She unburies her face from my chest and looks at me with an uncertain smile. I smile at her.

“Would you two lovebirds do this later? We have to get to the arena, were up first.” Donovan reminds us.

I gently set Shady down. “He’s right we should do this later, like over dinner?”

She freezes and a blush spills over her face. “Like a date?”

I just nod and grin at her expression as I nod and she seems to go a little limp. “Do I need to carry you again, beautiful?”

She starts walking towards the arena. I have to guide her a few times because she’s about to crash into things. Her face stays blushed the entire time and she is definitely distracted. Finally as were about to sit down she smiles at me. “I would love to. Kindness!”

I swear, that’s the loudest I’ve ever heard her talk and it makes me feel tingly all over. The happy feeling I get obliterating our competition is nothing next to the thrill of her saying yes. We spend time together hanging out as a group in between matchups. They issue beepers that tell us when it is almost our turn. Shady keeps close to me and doesn’t lose her blush. At one point it’s time for me to meet up with my dealers.

“Guys, I got some traders to meet up with. Nothing underground, but they aren't exactly nice people. You guys might want to meet up with me later, but you can come if you want. It shouldn’t be anything dangerous, I’m just buying flowers.”

“I’ll come, if you don’t mind.” She shoots me a happy smile and the others follow me as I go to make the deal. It goes smoothly, mostly. One of the younger traders makes a snide comment about Shady and gets knocked out by his boss before I even have a chance to be offended. To apologise the head trader who acquired all this for me gives me a discount, with a grin and a remark about coming out of the idiot’s wages. We walk back to the arena with me so happy I could almost sing. This has been the best night ever!

We manage to win the tournament, all the loot, all the glory all the power is ours. We are the champions of the decade and everyone cheers for us as we stand and take our medals. The rest of the con goes smoothly and it is three in the morning by the time it wraps up. As we walk out the door I run at a wall and run up it kicking off and landing with a whoop. “Best Night Ever!”

“Now is that only because Shade agreed to go out with you or does the victory factor in? Not sure if I approve of this courtship, but I’m willing to take pride in your victory. After all, being the best at anything is worthy of praise.”

A shiver of fear passes through me. Elder is behind me and I slowly turn and take a defensive stance upon seeing his mask fully in place with the deadened look in his eyes that shows he’s killed his emotions.

“Greetings Elder. I’m happy because of everything! The bulbs, the victory, the chance to see into Grandmaster Emeris’ mind.”

“Oh, and what about the date you have planned with that delicate flower behind you?”

Shady clings to my arm. Her voice is barely above a whisper. “Who is this, I feel afraid, there’s something wrong with his eyes.”

He Steps right in front of her staring into her eyes with his dead blue ones. One finger digging into my chest freezes my entire body in place and I can only stand there. “I’m what Katdestro will some day become. You only see a tiny fragment of him. Tell me, are you truly prepared to court him? Can you accept all the lives he’s ended? Can you truly embrace all of him? He is more than just Cat the gamer. He is also Katdestro, Death incarnate. A warrior who could kill you accidently.”

“He’s not that bad.” I feel a coldness clenching my heart. I thought she accepted me for what I was? “He’s different from you, he doesn’t enjoy it. I know who and what he is, but I accept it. I accept him. He isn’t like the rest of the nobles who kill anyone who challenges them for fun.”

He releases me and Steps back. “Oh really? Tell my, my little Kitty. Were you prepared to kill in order to go have fun tonight? Even if they were your own brother?”

I look down sadly. “Yes.” A sliver of ice enter my heart as Shade recoils from me.

“If I gave you an absolute order, would you kill her parents?”

My rage burns at the question. I lock eyes with Elder feeling my doa burning through my body. My friends all stumble backwards as I look back at them. “If this goes badly, do not interfere. Just run and pray he doesn’t bother with you.”

“Ah there he is. Tell me have you ever seen anything so magnificent? This is the real Katdestro, surging with lethal power and prepared to kill his own grandfather over a hypothetical question.”

Shady steps forwards and takes the Reaver stance next to me. I look at her in surprise and I see something in her eyes that I’ve never seen before. She has an immense amount of power hidden in her lithe frame that I never knew about. How have I never sensed this massive doa ki? She’s as powerful in doa as I am in sai and doa together in my default state.

“Ah and there's exactly what I wanted to show you. Katdestro Ironheart, meet Hillshade Firefist. The funny thing is Cat, you already met her parents.”

I step back in shock. “Why didn’t you ever tell me?”

She looks away. “Because I don’t want to be Hillshade. I want to be Shady. I’m sorry I lied to you, please don’t hate me.”

I smile and and pull her into a hug. “Shady I could never hate you. This doesn’t change anything. Well, actually it changes a lot, but in a good way. Like I can take you out on our date without spending the entire thing paranoid something horrible is going to happen. Now I suppose I should walk you home like a proper gentleman.” I turn to Elder. “Thanks, I think?”

“Oh you're not dismissed yet. See theres a reason I did this. You're taking this step into a relationship, yet neither of you is fully honest with the other.”

“And here I thought the point of dating was to get to know them better? There’s all kinds of time in the world, and I’m certain she would have told me eventually. Is this it? Just a lecture about my personal life, or is there something else?” I’m still enraged by the parents question and don’t feel like taking his shit right now. Not to mention I’m worried he’s going to talk about him.

He stares at us impassively for a moment, his expression remains unchanged and there is still no light in his eyes. A small smile that I hate curls his lips. “I think I’ll just watch this one play out. Have fun you two.” He vanishes. Sometimes I wonder if there is a teleportation technique that masters learn. He was there and just gone, no trails, no blur, no sound. He’s just gone. I turn back to my friends Donovan looks like he’s about ready to puke and the others aren't much better off.

“Cat, have I ever told you that you Altered are terrifying? No offense meant Cat… or Shady I suppose. That’s still hard to process, I mean theres a difference between knowing that somebody has a side of them like that, actually seeing it…” Donovan is looking at me and Shady with fresh eyes and I feel worried. Citizens aren’t good at handling a look at how the world really works. I hope they can treat me the same, and I really hope Shady and I don’t lose our friends.

“It’s ok, just because Shady and Kitty are from a different culture doesn’t mean they're not still our Shady and Kitty. We all have our dark sides. Donny you're an junior master level hacker, I’m an inventor who... who created the first citizen class projectile weapon in 200 years. Who we are when we're apart isn’t who we are when we're together. We really are stronger together, better together.” Johnny has a smile on his face, not quite his ever present beaming, but at least he’s still smiling. Everyone looks a little taken aback by this reminder of who we really are.

“He’s right, when we're together, we are gamers. Who we are outside doesn’t matter. My name is Cat, for the love of little green apples don’t call me Kitty.”

“How about Kitten?” Johnny is grinning at me and smiles are returning to the group.

I sigh melodramatically. “Just no.”

Shady looks at me sideways with a nervous smile. “Can I call you Kitty?”

I beam at her. “I wouldn’t mind that at all, actually.”

“Are you gonna go all sappy on us now?” Bolt looks exasperated.

I smirk. “Only on days of the week with a y in it. Guys, I don’t know about you, but I think it’s about time for us to be headed home.” I pause calculating the route through the city. “Let’s start with Johnny.”

Escorts home after events that wear into the dangerous parts of the night are common for us. The city can be a dangerous place and nothing says ‘lets mug the next guys and hide from these’ like an escort by an Altered. The trip goes mostly uneventful as we drop everyone off one by one. I realise that where Shady has me drop her off is likely not where she actually lives and ask her where she really lives.

“Well um, I live at the main estate for the Firefist clan, but I’m not sure if it’s a good idea for you to go there. My Elder is already in a bad mood because I’m out gaming.”

“But your Elder likes me, if you tell him we’re dating he’d probably lighten up a bit.”

“Okay, if you really don’t mind going to the edge of the city. I don’t mind walking alone.”

I smile and pull her close walking with my arm around her. “Shady, of course I don’t mind walking with you. I love spending time with you.”

She blushes and hesitantly snakes an arm around me. Here with her under the moon is a wonderful feeling. We talk as we walk and we tell each other about our stats. Turns out Shady is a doa type who has little to no skill in weapons but is a master level in unarmed combat. She specialises in Gentle fist styles but is skilled in most basic forms. We soon see the walls of her clan’s estate. The guards do not look happy upon seeing us together.

“Your home late, my little Shade.” A deep voice from behind us. The Firefist Elder is a tall skinny man known for his having reached the highest level of Reaver, able to kill by using doa strikes to vital points at a range. I give him a bow.

“Greetings again, Elder of the Firefist. I apologise for the delay, however we had a small problem with my Elder. How is your clan doing?”

He smiles, unlike my Elder he’s actually an overall nice guy, only ever serious when the situation requires him to be. He doesn’t bother with a mask of impassiveness, he allows his expression to be honest. He has a little anger, happiness and curiosity etched on his expressive face. “We are doing wonderful, son of Ironheart and Midnight Lotus. How does your clan fare?”

“We are doing well, the question of heirs may be resolved within a week.”

“Excelent. Now, might I ask what you are doing escorting my daughter home?”

“I wished to seek your blessings in pursuing a relationship with her.” I gulp as I sense his power flaring and his face looks conflicted. Anger, happiness, pride and sadness all etched across his face. Finally curiosity settles back into the mix.

“Cat, how did you even encounter her?” His eyes light up in amusement. “Don’t tell me I’m not the only one that has to deal with a gamer. Hah! You are! I can’t wait to mess with Solomon about this. Alright. Shady is special, my beloved youngest daughter. So know that I do not speak these words lightly. You may court her, but if you hurt her I am going to throw you in the dungeon of 99 hells.”

I grin at him. “Don’t worry I would never hurt Shady.”

He nods. “Good, I know you don’t lie. You are a man of honor who holds the virtues close to his heart. You fail a bit in the department of Magic, a known loner. As well as Kindness, I’ve wondered if Solomon beat the mercy out of you or if it’s an effect of the dem-” He thankfully cuts off before revealing the closest thing to a lie I have. My deepest darkest secret.

He hesitates and then smiles again. “But I have never seen you lie, even in a fight. Now I suppose it’s time for some rest. I’ll allow you to be a gentleman and escort her to her house on the estate. After all, your clan and mine have been blood brothers since before the Fall.” He backflips over the wall, the 50 foot high, topped with razor wire, wall. Masters are freaking scary.

I walk onto the estate with Shady leading me. Her house is a small cottage in the woods. She really is special to her Elder if she actually has her own house. I just have a small section at the back of the main manor and the garden. She hesitates at the door and a blush forms on her face.

“I… um… Cat…” She moves at speed I can barely even track and twists lacing her fingers in my hair pulling my head down to hers. Our lips meet in a kiss and my mind slams to a halt at the contact. All too quickly she breaks the kiss blushing like mad and smiling. “Goodnight!” She darts through her door and shuts it leaving me staring at the space she previously occupied as I try and get my brain to work. A sniggering behind me jumpstarts my brain. I turn and see a tall woman with long raven hair pulled into ponytail. Everything about her screams do not mess with, especially the bladed war bow on her back.

She has an amused look. “And here I was worried that you might be trying to take advantage of my little sister. Seriously what kind of man is overwhelmed by a simple kiss? It’s ok, I think I prefer her with a naive little adept like you, less to worry about. Are you any good with those weapons? A scorpion chain is a bit of a rarity and those swords are whispering to me.”

I smile finally recognising her. Long ago she was my instructor in my introduction to the art of weaponry. She is a grandmaster of weapon arts and sai, a scary accomplishment for her age. My old weapons master, Hellspark, the Thousand Blade Master. “The years have done you well, Sensei Sparky.”

She does a double take. “Wait, is that you Kitten? I haven't seen you in years! When did you go ahead and turn into a Cat without my permission?”

I snort. “It’s not my fault you didn’t want to teach me any more.”

“All that was left in your weapon training was sparing and advanced techniques, and I can’t safely do that with a twerp like you. Get stronger and I will teach you again gladly. Now, I was told to make sure you didn’t overstay your welcome on our estate. I’ll see you to the front gate.”

She Flashes away towards the exit and I do my best to follow her. Doa types have a move similar to the Step called the Flash. I leave the estate and head towards home a smile on my face. That was the best day ever, and for the first time in a long time I feel hope for a better tomorrow.

Something slams me to the ground mid Step and I roll to my feet locking eyes with my attacker. What the hell? They are a skeletal goat wearing a black cloak. Around his neck is a golden necklace with a large golden bell on it. I blink stupidly as I try and figure out what the hell is going on. Where am I? Everything is black and I’m standing on thin air. It’s like being in a dream.

“Katdestro Ironheart. Yes I think you’ll do nicely. If you ever want to see your world again, you’ll follow my orders. I am the rightful ruler of Equestria, Grogar the invincible. Await my orders with baited breath but for now simply bide your time, young human.”

Chapter 3

The world blurs and I land hard on something hard and white. What happened? I was running home after the best night ever and then… I feel a blank spot in my memories, like something should be there but isn’t. I unsteadily rise to my feet and look around. My eyes meet the gaze of a massive white horse with a strange ethereal mane and tail. No, a unicorn. No a winged unicorn. It’s looking at me with surprise then somehow it looks angry.

“Who are you and what are you doing here?”

“You just spoke? Wait, you're sitting on a throne and wearing some kind of gold crown and necklace. Your some kind of King? Great I got knocked out on my way home and now I’m dreaming.”

“I am Princess Celestia. Who are you?”

My mind comes to halt oh well, if this is a dream I might as well play along. Strange for a dream this sure hurts a lot, and she feels real. Actually no, her power is way too immense to be real. She’s beyond anything I’ve ever seen before. Not to mention that weird impossible hair. Maybe she’s a godess. Wait, if she’s a goddess then why am I in front of her?

“I’m dead aren't i?”

“What? I don’t think you're a spirit. It’s hard to tell, I’ve never seen a creature like you before.”

“I was running through the city, it was the best night ever. My group won the VD&D tournament and Shady agreed to go out with me. I even got bulbs for several rare flowers, including the sacred Midnight Lotus. I was headed back to my home and I remember feeling a lot of pain and being knocked to the ground. Somehow I ended up here. Oh, where are my manners. I’m in front of royalty.” I bow and continue. “Greeting Princess Celestia, I am Katdestro of the noble clan of Ironheart.”

She has a pensive look on her face. “Where are you from?”

“Ticonderoga city, Eastern zone, Earth, the milky way, whatever you call my universe or multiverse or omniverse.”

“Interesting, so I was right. You’ve been displaced from your native world by an unknown magic.”

“Magic? I get that I’m either dead or dreaming, but isn’t magic a bit much?”

She arches her eyebrows at me with a smile. “You are very much alive and awake-”

“We can confirm this. I am Luna, Princess of the Night.” Another winged unicorn walks into the room behind me, she is darkly colored and has a flowing hair reminiscent of stars.

“So what you're saying, is that somehow I magically ended up in a world of talking winged unicorns with weird glowing hair and of all the places I end up in the throne room with the princesses of the realm? So is the king gonna execute me when he finds me?”

“King?” Luna questions.

“Execute?” Celestia asks me.

I look back and forth between them. There is way too much power in this room. Way too much. I haven't felt anything like this since the last meeting of masters. All of it from those two beings. Perhaps princess is another word for goddess here? Luna said she was the Princess of the Night.

“Wait. Pause! Luna, Princess of the Moon? Celestia, Princess of the Sun?”

They look at me in surprise at the outburst. “Indeed.” Celestia tells me.

I pull my blades from their sheaths and they take a combat stance wings flared and horns glowing. “Wait! I just want to show you something! That’s so weird, see I can prove I’m dreaming. Look at the names of my swords. The sword of the sun” I hand it over to Celestia who picks it up in some kind of glowing field “and the sword of the moon” I hand the second one over to Luna who doest the same. “Look at the base of the blades. The names of the swords. Either I’ve fallen straight into mythos and am talking to the ones that raise the sun and the moon or-”

“You are, I raise the sun every morning.”

“And I the moon every evening. These swords are interesting. They feel so heavy, they appear resistant to magic, and they seem to be styled and named after us.”

I dazedly reach to take back the swords but slip and slice my finger on Luna, the sword, not the winged unicorn. As the small pain burns and I watch the drop of red blood well up and fall to the ground it sinks in. This is real. I’m actually in another world and I need to get back home. I sheath my blades and look at the two horses in front of me.

“I really am in a different world. You have magic right? You can send me back home?”

Celestia’s face shows a sadness. “I’m afraid that research into traveling to other realities is in it’s infancy. I am uncertain where to begin with sending you home.”

I fall backwards and land on my rump at this statement. “Cat, I’m afraid that if you're going to be in my realm, you will have to surrender your weapons until we are certain you're not a threat to our subjects.”

Makes sense, I suppose. Not that I’m going to hand over my only possessions without even trying. “How will I protect myself?”

She looks at me like I said something crazy. “What would you need to protect yourself from? Equestria is a peaceful country where Harmony rules. Here my little ponies can live happily without fear. Cat, put aside the dangers of your old world, you’re safe now.”

I sigh and nod. I slip my swords off my back and set them at Celestia’s feet. Next I unhook my Scorpion chain and drop that at Celestia’s feet. At the appearance of the hidden weapon her eyebrows raise in surprise. Next is the two straps of throwing knives. Celestia takes a step back and Luna’s horn has a soft glow. Reaching under my outerwear I begin unhooking all the straps and drop my harnesses with all my other type gear in the pile. With a small chuckle I pull out my staff and drop that in the pile, by now Celestia looks worried and Luna is definitely on edge. Finally I drop the two tool bags in the pile and bow again.

“Is-is this normal for you? Or were you on a battlefield?”

“This is my standard gear, but life is a battlefield, so both I guess.”

“You are a warrior? Your world must be a truly dark and dangerous place to live if your outlook is so dark. This is all your weapons?”

“Apart from my Altered body, aye.”

“Altered? Altered from what?”

“There are two kinds of humans. Citizens and Altered. Citizens are the normal people, they work and do citizen stuff. Altered are humans who have trained their bodies and their ki to a point where the physiology is different. For example a normal body has red muscle and white muscle with only a little pink muscle that has the best traits of the other two in between. I am 60% pink muscle, resulting in higher endurance, resilience, speed and strength then a citizen with the same build, however this comes at a cost of increased weight and metabolism. Pink muscle is far denser than the other two and I weigh a lot more than a citizen of the same build.

“Another example is my brain, citizens use about 30% of their maximum potential. I use about 60%. My eyes and bone are the result of genetic modification and good breeding. My eyes perform far more saccades and my bones are a lot harder to damage. Good breeding and the blood of Grandmaster Emeris also resulted in my ki having a good natural base and being easily trained.”

“It sounds like the purpose of the Altered is to exist to fight. What great enemy does your species have that it requires such warriors?”

“We are strong so we can rule and protect our subjects. Strength is a way of life, I do not know how your land has peace, but mine is through fear. Would be criminals know that you never know how strong someone is and even if you can pull off the crime, you must deal with the nobles.”

She looks at me with a hint of disgust. “So your tyrants that claim peace can only be obtained through bloodshed.”

“Perhaps, but humans are naturally chaotic and destructive beings. An herbivore like you could never understand the mindsets that can exist amongst those evolved from predators. We almost destroyed ourselves long ago, but Emeris saved us. He taught us to value strength and to follow the teachings of the Elements of Harmony, living for love and tolerance. Honesty, Loyalty-”

“Generosity, Kindness, Laughter and Magic. It is a surprise that your world has the Elements of Harmony as well. I thought you said your world didn’t have magic?”

“It doesn’t. Magic is more of a concept, the magic of friendship, being stronger together, being creative and thirsting for knowledge. It’s different from the magic of this world, yet I suspect that you would find it in more abundance here, if this world is as peaceful as you claim.”

“So what Element of Harmony do you possess?”

I smile. “I’m decently generous, but hardly a saint. I had been alone for a long time, never letting anyone close enough to be a friend, until I met Shady…” I trail off as it truly hits me. I fall to my knees and my eyes burn as I fight back tears. Shady. I have to get back. “I have to go back. I have to go to Shady. She’s going to miss me, and I need her.”

“Are you okay?” Celestia’s face is one of compassion and kindness. I leap back away from her.

“Don’t look at me like that, kindness only reminds me of her. Shady is the kindest person you’ll ever meet, she’s quiet and shy and absolutely adorable. I miss my friends. Bolt, he’s always cocky and can be a little grating, but his Loyalty is unmatched. Johnny is random and sometimes the things he does makes no sense, but he can make anyone smile no matter how dark things are. Donny is the one that always holds us together. He’s obsessed with books, but he always know what to do. Suzie is always generous, even if she is a bit obsessed with her looks.”

Celestia’s eyes go wide. “And you're always honest and hardworking. Good with plants and dependable. Family and friends are highly important to you.”

“Indeed, how did you know that?”

“Because you and your friends are parallel to our world. Our worlds version of you is Applejack, she’s an earth-pony mare and the Element of Honesty.”

My brow furrows in confusion. “How can you be an Element? I get if she’s embodies it well, but being recognised as the embodiment of it?”

Now it’s Celestia’s turn to be confused for a moment. “The Elements are more than just concepts here, they are physical objects of immense power, tied to the force of Harmony itself. They are wielded by six mares who are the greatest heroes of our age. Follow me.” She leads me through the castle along the way they fill me in on Equestria. They seem to be reluctant to let any silence fall and for that I am grateful. I learn a lot about Equestria and then they give me a brief history lesson using stained glass windows.

It was dusk when I arrived, and now it’s getting late. They insist that I get some sleep, despite me not really needing or wanting it. Despite the soft bed I can’t sleep. My mind is buzzing with the day’s events and I feel a dull ache in my heart. Will I find a way back home to be with Shady and see my family again?

I hear my door open and bolt upright reaching for a nonexistent sword next to my bed. It’s just Luna and she looks surprised by the sudden movement I made at her entry. “Hi again Luna. Can’t sleep either? Then again as the princess of the night are you nocturnal? Wait, why would a goddess need sleep? So if none of us needed to sleep why did I have to go lay in a bed?”

“Your kind is nocturnal?”

“Naw, I just need 12 hours a week, sometime less or more depending on ki usage. So it’s just really not my bed time yet. So what brings you here?”

“We searched the dream realm for you and was unsuccessful. So we came to find your dreams from the source. We had not thought that thou was still awake after two hours.”

“Who else was trying to break into my dreams?”

“Apologies, the royal we is a habit from olden times. I try and speak like the modern ponies, however sometimes old habit appear.”

“Makes sense. What did you do with my gear? Please be careful with them, especially the swords. They are my most prized possessions.”

“Why would weapons be so important to you? We spoke the truth when we told you that this is a peaceful land.”

I narrow my eyes at her, that had better not be her evading telling me she had them destroyed. “I am a warrior, even in a peaceful land they are important. Remember when you handle them that you are handling the shards of my soul, and the spirit of my ancestors. Those swords especially. They belonged to the greatest hero of my world, a legendary warrior whom I am descended from. Not to mention I’m going to want them in perfect condition when I return home.”

“Than I understand the swords, but the rest... why do you consider forged metal to hold your soul?” She appears unphased by my outburst and has a curious expression.

“Tell me, that crown upon your head, is it important to you? Mere metal and jewels given a shape.”

She looks at me in surprise. “Indeed, but it falls into the category as your swords. Priceless not because of it’s shape, but in how it has shaped the world.”

“Indeed, and my gear is how I shape myself. That chain represents countless years spent mastering it, teaching it, and being taught in return. Now” I rise from the bed and look her in the eyes letting my voice drop to a low dangerous tone “ya haven't answered da question on what cha did with my gear and weather it’s safe.”

Her horn lights at the threat and a scowl forms on my face. “I assure you everything is fine, locked away in a royal vault until we can trust you.”

I relax and flop back down on the bed relieved. “That’s good, no chance of anything happening to something stashed in the royal vault. One less thing to worry about. Tell me, what would it take to go home? What exactly is the difficulty?”

“I cannot answer that, however there is one unicorn who has studied the field better than anypony else. My sister’s student, Twilight Sparkle. If anypony can answer your question it is her. Most consider the field to not be worth the effort of studying, but young Twilight is known for studying anything she comes across.”

I sigh. “If it’s in order to go home I’ll do it.”

“Why are you not looking forwards to meeting her? I assure you that she is a good pony,despite her obsession with learning.”

“I don’t want to meet them. This world’s version of my friends. Exspecially not this world’s Shady. Not because if Twilight is anything like Donny she’ll have a thousand questions for me about my world, but because it’s gonna hurt. I’m holding on to the skeleton of hope, but if Twilight tells me there ain't any… Fine, I’ll go meet them tomorrow.”

“Very well, I will have my sister send Twilight a message to expect your arrival and will arrange for a transport there. The train isn’t going there tomorrow. For now, try and get some sleep and have pleasant dreams.”

She leaves me alone with my thoughts. Theres no way I’m going to be able to sleep, so I need to occupy my time.

Morning comes and Celestia finds me outside with my legs holding onto a tree branch while I alternate between curling up frontwards and backwards holding onto the position. This exercise builds most of the muscles needed for endurance during a fight.

“What are you doing?”

“Exercising, Couldn’t sleep so I worked on my training.”

She blinks at me as I continue my exercise. “How did you even find your way out of the castle? My guards would have raised a fuss.”

“Well I considered just going out the window, but it turns out that your guards couldn’t fault the logic of what possible harm is there in escorting someone out of the castle and they understood the need to use hard exercise to get my mind of things. That Echo pony even decided to exercise with me, she left at sunrise and you might want to check in on her. She wasn’t looking very good when she left. I gotta say, ponies weren't what I was expecting. I mean somehow they managed to look cute despite the fangs and batwings, but still not what I was expecting.” I drop out of the tree and land in a bow for a moment. “Anyways, how are you today, Princess Celestia?”

“Those were thestrals, one of the night pony races. Of the day ponies there are the magical unicorns, the flying pegasus who control the weather and the strong enduring earth ponies who grow food and work the land. Of the night ponies there are the moon ponies who are similar to unicorns, the thestrals who fly and fight Nightmares who enter this world, and againap who wield a strange shadow magic. Your transport is ready to leave, though I must say I have my doubts about this. Had Luna not already promised you I would have you stay here a little longer.”

“Even if I was a threat, not that I am unless threatened, do you not trust your student? Oh, and another thing, why is everybody nude? You know aside from the guards armor and occasional pony wearing some manner of fancy outfit?”

She looks at me in surprise. “I’m afraid I don’t understand, is there a taboo against being without clothing in your world?”

“Very much so, it is vulgar to not wear something at the very least to cover your nether regions and chest.”

“I see, there is no such taboo here. Try not to feel awkward about it, however difficult that may be.”

I shrug. “Understood, alrighty so where is this transport?”

She leads me back into the castle up a lot of stairs and I find myself in front of a chariot that is hovering just a bit off the ground with two pegasi hooked to in ready to pull it. With an uncertain grin I step into the chariot and am surprised when Celestia steps in next to me. She explains that she feels a need to be there personally for the meeting and I can read between the lines that she doesn’t trust me in the slightest. Despite the awesomeness of the ride through the sky it is a quiet ride with me leaning against the side sullenly.

As we are approaching the little town suddenly a massive tornado appears near the town. I stare at it in shock. “Princess we need to do something, evacuate the ponies or-”

I cut off at her chuckle, I guess this is normal? Looking more carefully I notice that it isn’t moving and there are a lot of pegasi inside it, moving in line with it and seemingly creating it. We touch down at the base of the tornado and Celestia explains it to me. By the time she’s done explaining how weather works in this strange world the tornado has does it’s job and a lot of pegasi land with a bow. Several who look sick land off in the distance and a group of unicorns in white outfits rush over to them.

A pegasi with a cyan coat and the entire spectrum of the rainbow in her hair, er I mean mane and tail, hovers excitedly in front of us. “We almost didn’t have enough power to do it princess, but once they heard that you would be here personally not even being sick was enough to keep Ponyville’s flyers away. If only they had been in top condition, we could have beaten the record. So you're the visitor that Twilight is waiting for? I’m Rainbow Dash, fastest flyer in Equestria.”

I facepalm. “For the love of the blood gods… you really are some kind of female version of Bolt. Element of Loyalty right? You love anything athletic and hate losing, mushy stuff or anyone knowing that you secretly have an egghead side? Gods, you even sound like Him! I told him he had a chicks voice!”

“How did you know that? Are you a-”

I grin knowing what was coming and cut him- I mean her off. “If I was a spy I wouldn’t admit it, why are you asking? Are you a spy? Can you prove to me that you're not a spy?”

My grin widens as she blinks at me and flaps backwards with a strange look on her face. “Lets… lets go talk to Twilight.”

I laugh “I thought it would hurt seeing this world’s versions of my friends, but really it feels kinda nice. Something familiar, you know? Now I’m actually looking forward to meeting the other Element of Honesty.”

Dash shoots me another weird look as me and Princess Celestia follow her. She takes us to a library in a tree where a frantic purple unicorn is cleaning the immaculate library like she is in the throes of an OCD fit. Upon seeing us all the cleaning supplies vanish with a pop and she shouts “Princess Celestia!”

“And her plus one. Let’s see, lives in a library and has some OCD issues. You have got to be the Element of magic, but this one was easy, who else but the Element of Magic would I be coming to consult on a way home?”

“Greetings Twilight, I see you received my letter well enough. I’ll leave Cat to introduce himself.”

“Hi, I am Katdestro, you can call me Cat. Somehow I got sent to this world from another and was told that you are the current expert in the field of traveling to another world. I was wondering if you could tell me my chances of being able to go home. Oh, just figured I should explain some of my weird comments from earlier. It’s a parallel world and I’m my worlds parallel of your Element of Honesty. Your this world's version of my friend Donny and Dash is this world's version of my friend Bolt. I would really like to meet myself, er I mean this world's version of me. The Element of Honesty.”

Twilight freezes at my words like she’s trying to absorb them. Suddenly her eyes droop and she looks at me sadly. That bad huh? I expected it but I still cling to hope until she says the words.

“Cat, the studying of other worlds is in its most basic form. The absolute best we can do get temporary glimpses of other worlds at random. All I know about the field is what I learned from Starswirl’s books and what little research I have done myself. It could take years of study to advance the field enough to send a living being through whole. There are rumors that the field used to be more well known, to the point where Starswirl had an assistant from another world. Not much is known about them besides they were of the species human from the world Earth.”

My eyes light up at the good news. “That’s my species and world! So someone has opened a portal to my world before! It is possible! This is better than I had hoped, at least theres a chance. Now, how exactly was this Starswirl’s research lost? Is it impossible to translate or destroyed?”

Celestia looks at me sadly. “Much of Starswirl’s research was stolen by an old enemy. If it still exist it is in the shadow dimension of Tambelon. It would be the height of foolishness to go seeking it however, as nopony knows how to enter Tambelon, and even when the way was known, few had ever survived to leave.”

I nod and think about it. “So, our best bet is to some available researchers studying the field to rediscover the secrets. If a goddess is afraid to go somewhere, that’s the last place I ever want to have the misfortune of ever venturing.”

“Princess, might I have access to the Starswirl section again? I think I can discover the secrets again.” Twilight looks eager and I’m happy to see her so enthused about it.

“No, I will assign a team to this project. Your studies are too important to neglect with this singular and highly dangerous field of magic. I will allow you assist the team, but not at the detriment of yourself or your studies.”

Harsh but understandable. Poor Twilight looks like she’s been kicked and I want to cheer her up. “So I bet you have some questions for me?” Her eyes light up but I cut her off. “I’ll let you interview me, but I have a condition. I want to meet all the Element Bearers of this world.” I hesitate for a moment debating excluding Kindness from it. But there's hope now, hope of seeing Shady again so I decide I’ll be fine.

She nods in understanding. “That sounds like a good idea actually. Dash, go get Fluttershy and Applejack, I’ll get Pinkie and Rarity. This way Cat can explain his story to all of them at once.” Dash flies off at Stepping speed and Twilight disappears in a flash of purple light. I walk outside the library and a pink pony Steps in front of me with a grin on her face.

“Ohmygosh! Hi, I’m Pinkie Pie and you must be new, because I know everypony in Ponyville. Not that you’re a pony, actually I don’t know what you are. You know what this calls for?”

“A party?”

Her eyes widen at my response and she starts bouncing around me. “Omygosh, do you love parties as much as I do? Or are you a mind reader? What am I thinking right now?”

I blink. “I’m pretty sure no one in this world loves parties as much as you do, Johnny does, but he’s not in this world. As for what you're thinking, I’m pretty sure you don’t even know. Though I would hazard a guess that it’s something completely unrelated to this, like what flavor of cupcake taste like triangle.”

She stops and stares at me. “Have we met before? It feels like I’ve met you before. For some reason Big Mac comes to mind, it’s like you're one of him from an alternate reality that resulted in you having a different personality because of the different environments but deep down you're the same.”

I feel a small shiver and turn around to look back at Celestia in the library. “Spooky pony is spooky. Princess Celestia is it too late to hide before the Element of Kindness shows up?”

“Um… I can leave if you don’t want to see me. I don’t mind... I’m sorry.”

I turn and a sliver of ice stabs my heart as I behold a small yellow pegasus peeking at me sadly from behind a curtain of pink.

Chapter 4

Chapter 4
“Shady. No, your not Shady, but you are. Gah, this is so confusing. Everything about you is just like her. Even the voices...” She starts to turn and leave. “Please don’t go. I’m sorry I made you sad, it’s ok. I want to talk to you, it’s just a little hard to explain. Just please come inside and when everyone else gets here I’ll explain everything.”

She looks at me and just stands there frozen until Dash lands next to her. She turns to glares at me. “Did you say something mean to Fluttershy?”

I stare back and unbidden a smile comes back to my face. “Fluttershy? That’s such a cute name. I didn’t mean it to sound mean, but I’ll explain once everyone gets here. She heard me ask Celestia if it was too late to hide before she got here, I lost my nerve for a moment.”

“Why would you want to hide? You said that we were all the alternate versions of your friends back home. Wouldn’t that make seeing her a good thing?”

“Dash, I… Just let me explain it once. I don’t think I can do it more than that.”

“Well, everypony is here now, so explain.” She still looks pretty ticked.

I walk inside the library and sit down on the floor. I could really use some tea right about now. I explain my story to the six mares sitting around listening to me. I tell them about being a warrior and a noble in my world. I tell them about years of training and fighting on the path of mastery. I show them Stepping and ki. Finally I get down to the hard part.

I sit back down inside the library. “Long ago I was alone, no friends and my family could never really understand me well enough to find friends among them. I love my family, but I was still lonely. But one day I met Shady at a gaming store. She said she saw my sadness and loneliness and wanted to help. She introduced me to her friends and despite some initial reservations about getting close to an Altered they came to accept me as a friend. Recently we discovered VD&D and the personality checker found us all to be perfect matches to our respective Elements. You see me and my friends are a parallel to you six.

“Donny, who always kept us together and was the smartest in our group, Magic of Friendship. Bolt, who was victory obsessed but always Loyal. Suzanah who was beautiful inside and out, so very Generous. Johnny who could always get people to smile and loved to party, everywhere he went he brought Laughter. Me, who works hard, loves gardening and is always Honest to himself and others. Then there was Shady, my beautiful Shady. So beautiful and cute, a gentle soul that is never lacking in Kindness. She changed my entire life with a smile and the day I asked her out was the happiest in my life, you know right up until the sucked out of my world and dropped in another one with no clue if I’ll ever see her or my family again.

“That’s why I was so afraid to meet you Fluttershy. Seeing such a hard reminder of her and knowing I might never see her again, it hurts. Don’t feel bad, it’s not your fault in any way shape or form and it hurts a lot worse if I see you sad. It’s not so bad now, but at first it felt like a dagger of ice in my heart. Now on to something way less depressing. Applejack, nice to meet you. I art thou and thou art I, heh.”

Applejack gives me an incredulous look. “So what yer saying is that yer some kinda version of me from another world?”

I grin. “Aye.”

Suddenly a grin splits her face. “Wait a second, your voice is exactly like Big Mac’s! You sure talk a lot more then him though. Hey Dash, if he’s me and he beats you in a race, does that mean I beat you in a race?”

Dash gets a competitive grin on her face. “There's no way I’m going to lose in speed. But if he can use his freaky powers I get to use my wings.”

I look at her with my head cocked to the side. “I don’t have any freaky powers. Everyone has ki, whether they learn to use it or not.” I frown thinking. “Or do they? I know that’s true for humans, but is it true for ponies? Humans developed our ki through evolution but ponies developed magic. Then again either way the point is moot, if you're using your wings that’s no different than me using my legs. Fine, a race. You can use your wings and I’ll use my ki.”

She grins and Applejack facepalms. Wait, do ponies have palms? Facehoofs? I’ll stick with that for now. They have some weird language changes, but I have to resist picking them up. Last thing I want is to get back to my world saying anypony and calling girls mares. “Now, what exactly have I gotten myself into? There haven't been any stakes set so it’s just a race, doesn’t matter if I win or lose.”

Dash and Applejack look at me strangely until I shoot them a rogue grin. “Not that I’m gonna lose.”

There grins match my own and they lead me off to the protesting of Twilight who still wants me to answer her questions and a interested yet worried look on Celestia’s face. They take me to a forest called Whitetail woods where there is a long dirt road. The rules are I can use ki, Dash can use her wings, but no shortcuts, interfering or distracting. I grin and line up next to Dash waiting for Twilight to give the signal.

“Go!”

I Step forwards along the path and grin at the small gasp of the women behind me until a rainbow colored blur shoots by me. No way in hell am I gonna lose, I pulse my ki and dart after her. Step, landing step, positioning step, Step. I blur past her but she overtakes me in the three steps in between Steps. We streak through the woods at breakneck speeds until the path turns sharply. I grin as Dash slows down a small amount as I simply bounce off a tree and keep going. She’s faster but I’ve got a lot of practice Stepping through the city, trust me, if you need to slow down to turn, you’re already dead.

She blurs past me even faster and I catch her determined grin as she passes. I try and find some reason to win, something to be passionate about. Some reason to win this game. Game? I grin as my doa finally unleashes. I love games. Using the doa to strengthen my legs and protect my body from the speed of the next level I stare ahead and Flash Step ahead of Dash. You see doa users use the Flash technique to basically increase the strength of their legs and feet and boost their resistance to damage so the speed doesn’t hurt them. Advantages is it’s basically high speed running and doesn’t have a down time.

My usual move the Step on the other hand is essentially time manipulation. I lock onto a target, slow time down for myself, brace and position my legs, and leap at the target. Advantages is that it is faster in spite of the steps needed to trigger it. The Flash Step on the other hoof-hand, damn ponies infecting my mind, is slowing time down for myself, boosting my strength and resilience and leaping while quickly moving my legs into position for the next leap. It has a farther range and the down time is cut in three.

I rip past Dash ignoring the burning in my lungs. I’m forcing a master level technique with only Elite level doa and my body won’t thank me for it later. Essentially, I’m moving too fast to breath and starting to tear my muscles. I’m closing on the finish line when I hear a resounding boom behind me and a rainbow beam shoots by me missing my by inches. Looking closer I realise that the beam is Dash and stumble rolling over the finish line in a scratched and groaning heap.

“Yall knocked him over! You cheated again Dash!” Seriously why does she have a southern accent? I rise to my head and shake my feet. Wait, that’s not left. Did I scramble my coconut? I feel my vision darkening as I try and shake my hand back to normal. “She didn’t amaze me. I was so tripped I lost control. Hang on, I need ta answer my phone.” I dig the device out of my pocket and hold it up to my ear. I hear a distant voice.

“He… he’s unconscious. Standing and talking, but unconscious. How is this even possible Princess Celestia?”

“Excuse me, I’m on the phone with my garden right now, quiet down a bit.” I slowly come to my senses and watch amused as my vision returns looking at my phone confused. I could have sworn that my garden just called… “I got knocked out again didn’t I?”

I look around to the stunned and scared women around me. Twilight’s horn is glowing and a purple aura surrounds me. She has a look of intense concentration and the cuts on my hands and face are closing. “Is it really safe to perform medical magic on a creature with completely unknown physiology that is supposed to be different from the way their genetics say they should be?” The aura disappears and she looks at me with a sheepish expression.

“I just wanted to help, but something about you was resisting the magic. Your hands and face were easy, but everything else felt like it was far away.”

I flex my hands experimentally and look at her with horror as I feel my grip to be weaker. “You turned some of my muscle back! Twi you're lucky it didn’t work, you could have killed me!”

If she had turned all my muscles back this much my ki would have been too much for my body to handle and I would start tearing muscles every single time I moved. An Altered body is needed to hold an Altered soul. She looks at me in confusion. “How could a healing spell have killed you?”

“Because my body is mutated and you started reverting it from its unmutated state. Think about it like this. What happens if you take a unicorn and turn them into an earth pony but leave all that magical energy without a release?”

“It would get channeled into the muscles and used as physical energy.”

“And what happens to the muscles of the now earth pony that are not used to the strengthening?”

“The magic reinforces them.”

I groan and facepalm. Magic is way too different for this. “What happens if you take a really powerful unicorn and turn them into a child with all that magic packed into their body?”

She looks disturbed. “It’s happened before. They had to wear an inhibitor ring until they grew up again so their horn didn’t explode or melt off.”

I stare straight into her eyes. “Now imagine that, except the power gets channeled with every single movement and breath. All that power coursing through me, yet my muscles are now that of a normal human. Every single breath and movement would tear muscles until I could no longer force my body to breath. It happened before on my world. Medical Nanobots from before the Fall were released on accident. 200 Altered all dead and the area had to be quarantined until a remote hacking unit could be called in to terminate the bots. There were three survivors in the entire village, all small children who had not begun the training yet. The nanobots had done the worst damage of all to them though. They were never able to become Altered or use ki. We called them the lost souls.”

Celestia looks at me in shock. “So simply because they couldn’t fight they were considered lost?”

“It was worse than simply being unable to fight. They were still nobles. Born with our denser bones and different eyes, yet their muscles had been positioned to how they are on a human body and all the pink muscle was deleted. They were barely able to survive without assistance, yet unable to kill themselves because they were the last of their clan. Not that it mattered in the end, as none of them ever ended up with a wife or children.”

Horrified looks spread throughout the group. Celestia asks me a telling question. “Wolf, if you became irreparable crippled and unable to survive without assistance from others, what would you do?”

“I would commit harakiri, as is befitting the honor of a warrior, why?”

A relieved smile spreads across her face. “I was worried you would say you would kill yourself.”

I blink confusedly. “I did say that. Harakiri is honorable suicide. It is counted by Death to be the same as dying in battle with honor.”

She freezes and stares at me in shock but I continue. “It’s better that than live a half-life of suffering and uselessness waiting for my body to deteriorate enough for my ki to kill me.”

“If this is how your entire race thinks they sicken me. Does life hold no value to you?”

“Of course life is valuable, but that is exactly why it is honorable to kill yourself when your life is over and you are merely alive. Why waste the precious food and resources on someone who has no future or reason to exist?”

“Food and resources are scarce in your world?”

“They can be, even the nobles who have more income has to deal with the much higher metabolism of being Altered, so it balances out. You realize that you're talking about a person who must eat enough food to keep five Citizens alive yet cannot perform any of their duties as a noble?”

Her eyes brighten as the ghost of a smile crosses her lips. “This only applies to nobles than? Only to the warrior class of your world?”

“Indeed, Citizens have hospitals that specialize in the treatment of those who cannot provide for themselves and give them a way to contribute to society. Speaking of all this, I’m ravenous and could really go for some…” I trail off, come to think of it I saw a cow walking around and talking to ponies on the way here. What exactly isn’t sentient in this world.

She has a slightly fearful and angry look on her face. “Finish that sentence.” Her words are clipped and dangerous.

I gulp. “I could really go for some burgers and fries right about now.”

She laughs and it sounds off. “Oh is that all? There is a hayburger in town, Twilight take him and send me the bill later.”

“Hayburger? Huh, so you make burgers out of hay here?” At the nod I ponder out loud. “Wonder if I can eat em, I ate grass once when I was lost in the woods as a kid, this is kinda like that except it’s probably dryer. Maybe if I just get plenty of water? But what am I going to do about protein? Alrighty then, let’s go Twi I’ll tell you anything you want to know about me and my world over lunch.”

She leads me away and Applejack and Dash follow us. Fluttershy has thankfully long since disappeared. She nice, but every time she talks I get reminded that I might never see Shady again. Dash doesn’t trigger it for some reason and instead it makes me feel at home. We sit at a table at the Hayburger and I look over the menu. Since royalty is paying I order five deluxe hayburgers with a pitcher of water and a double order of hayfries. Time to find out if I can eat it.

Dash stares at the plate they bring me. “Are you really going to be able to eat all that?”

I grin at her. “I have no idea whatsoever, but I’m gonna try like hell.” I pick up the first one. It is fried hay with several thick slices of tomato and pickles with a garnish of flowers. I experimentally attempt to eat one of the flowers and stare at them confused. Flowers are usually bitter not sweet. Encouraged by the fact that vegetation is distinctively different in this world I pour on some kutsup and take a bite of the burger. It tastes good, but it’s as hard to chew as well, hay. After spending way longer chewing than any food should ever take I give up and swallow the ball of plants and bread with a dose of water.

“Well, it’s edible. Digestible is still a question, but I can eat it and it doesn’t taste all that bad.”

“So what do your species make burgers out of?”

“Usually beef but some places use a pork and beef blend that makes it taste better.” You could have heard a pin drop as the already nervous crowd slowly turns to stare at me. The only cow in the place starts hyperventilating and backing away slowly staring at me in horror.

“Not the sentient kind, humans don’t eat sentient animals. Like horses, cats, dogs or the like. Don’t worry I’m gonna try and go vegetarian while I’m in this world. No idea how I’m gonna get all the iron and protein I need, though.”

The girls hesitantly come back to the table where I am calmly attempting to eat my burgers, but the restaurant is quickly emptying. A very nervous looking pony in a suit comes up to me.

“I am the owner of this establishment and I would like to ask you to… um… please leave… if you don’t mind… um.”

He starts breaking up as I turn my head and stare at him. After I finally swallow and can talk I reply. “Mind if I borrow this tray?” I pile all the burgers and fries back on the tray at his nod and dump a small pile of catsup in the corner of it for the still untested fries. I’m hoping they are easier to eat and intend to save them for last. I hold the tray in one hand and walk off munching on my burger. Did my life get too good and my happiness trigger a calamity of karma? It really has been a string of bad things since we won.

I wonder around town munching on my food and melancholy watching ponies dart into their houses when they see me coming. I come across a zebra wearing a cloak that is looking the opposite way.

“I thought this was done foolish pony folk, this is poor taste for a joke.”

“What’s the matter?”

She doesn’t turn and instead stares around the deserted town. “Long ago my little filly friend had brought this hiding to an end. Yet now as I wonder the town everyone had hidden and none are around.”

“Yeah, their hiding from me.” Is it just me or is there something off about the way she talks?

She turns and stares up at me in surprise. “Ah, so the fools still fear the unknown and hide from all strangers in their home.”

Huh, that settles it. She’s speaking in rote. I wonder why? “Naw, they were fine until they found out I eat meat. It’s ok you can run away, it won’t make you a hypocrite. Totally different scenarios of hiding from someone because they're different and hiding because they actually do something that scares you.” I finish the last bite of my last hayburger and start on the fries. Oh, they are good! A little weirdly textured, but easy enough to eat and they go down like normal fries.

She seems to freeze for a moment. “Of many creatures I know the lore, yet never your kind have I seen before. However from the ancient stories learned by mother's side not even a traveler as lost as you can hide. From another world cast into this, inside their heart is an abyss, hands that create what is in their mind, yet dangerous still is mankind.”

She is backing away and suddenly turns and darts off in a gallop. I have a choice to make. Risk my lunch and maybe learn more about previous humans to come to this world and hopefully a clue towards getting home. Or stand here and not scare the hell out of the locals anymore. Setting down my food quickly I Step next to the zebra and tap her on the shoulder as I run alongside her. “Oh, now this is interesting. I’m not the first human to get stuck here and from the sound of it they were common enough to leave a mark on history. The fact that they are no longer here means either they all died out, or there's a way home. Which is it and I’ll leave you be.”

She slows and stops. “Humans came as the pawns of the darkest evil and destroyed themselves after his fall. None was known to ever return despite the tales the dark one did turn. The zebras used to be so proud, yet Grogar turned all that around. Now we live simpler lives lest we fall again to his lies. Beware young human for this is true. He brought you here and has a use for you. Listen not to what he says, for in the end nothing he gives ever stays.”

She turns and trots off towards the forest as I Step back to where I left my food. Luckily it’s still perfectly fine and I finish off my fries contemplating her words. It seems I have some clues. Theres someone named Grogar who if he isn’t involved it is likely someone who followed in his footsteps. The way she described him leads to me thinking he’s some manner of demon, complete with the one sided contract shtick.

“Cat! I think it’s best if we return to Canterlot now.” Celestia looks annoyed.

Chapter 5

I turn to Celestia. “Aye, hey know of an ancient evil by the name of Grogar?”

She freezes in place locking me in her hard gaze. “How did you learn that name?”

“Talked to a zebra and they told me that there was a guy named Grogar who used to bring humans to this world to work as his soldiers controlling them with false promises of returning home. She seemed pretty convinced that he brought me here for a purpose. I think he messed up pretty bad if he did.”

She arches an eyebrow at me. “How so? You seem to be a perfect soldier for him. Highly trained in combat, wearing armor and carrying weapons that are resistant to magic and worst of all, you would do anything to go home.”

“Not anything Celestia, not even close. Not to mention that if I ever see him and he is the one who brought me here I’m going to beat him into submission and drag him to you so that you can make sure that the spell to send me home is real. Not just gonna to let an enemy do some unknown magic on me. Seriously, look what happened the last time someone used magic on me, they almost killed me. Though I don’t know how much of a chance I stand against him…”

“None.”

I smile at her grim tone as we board the flying chariot. “So this could have gone better. My stomach feels weird, at least it’s full, but weird.”

She groans. “Why did you eat it if your body can’t digest it?”

“I’m an Altered, I can digest almost anything if I have to. There are masters who get in week long fights and survive by taking bites out of trees. Though that is only if they are traveling alone. Among martial artists, it is dishonorable to harm those two or more levels below you when they are not criminals or threatening you. In such a fight it is the disciples sacred duty to spend as much time as possible scavenging for food for their master. However often the two disciples will fight to cut off the enemy master’s supplies. I was involved in such an undertaking long ago when traveling with Elder. I ended up getting my face kicked in and having all the food I had gathered for my master thrown off a cliff.”

She looks at me in surprise. “The other disciple didn’t take it for their master?”

“It was bad enough that they took the food, but to steal it and deliver it to their master as though they had earned it would be the height of shame. Still his actions were enough that the enemy retired from the fight and declared it Elder’s victory. I had offered peace while we serve our masters and he attacked me in reply. Shameful and dishonorable, even if I am a warrior when I acted in the hope of peace I became a non-combatant.”

“Your culture is strange to me. Killing is normal, you eat meat and suicide is acceptable, yet stealing and attacking someone who is peaceful is wrong. All this trouble caused today was a result of your pure honesty. I can’t decide whether your kind is evil or good.”

I raise an eyebrow at her. “Evil or good? In my world, only fools deal in absolutes. You see for every so called villain there's four sides to the story. The hero’s, the villain's, the victim's, and the impartial truth as seen only by the gods. Let me tell you a story. Recently in my world, there was a string of robberies. The robberies were all strange in that they were incredibly well planned and executed to the point where only an Altered could have done it. I rose to protect the Citizens who needed me and began hunting down the thief.

“I discovered that all the victims had something in common, all had pledged their support for a newly formed clan, yet none of them had made good on the promises. Looking into it I discovered that they had all thought that since the gang appeared to lack the cohesion despite their strength they had thought that becoming a clan was impossible and had simply sought to use false promises to get rid of the dangerous gang members.

“Naturally I went to the new clan and told them what I had discovered about them. They became livid, accusing each other of being thieves and a fight broke out. From what I had learned beforehand and what I was told while I was there such fights were common among them. I stopped the fight and made them listen to me. After all, they were a small clan operating out of my clan’s territory and I could cut their status with a word.

“I was surprised to discover that they were very annoyed at me for stopping the fight, they wanted to know how I was going to get the truth without it. Now that things had calmed down I had an interesting problem. To me, the robbers are criminals to be hunted down and locked up. To the victims if the robber is from this clan it is simply reaping what you sow. To the clan if the robber is among them they are filth that will be kicked from the clan. Yet, when I looked around their base I found no sign of anything that had been stolen and obvious signs of poverty.

“I interviewed them and, in the end, found the one in the clan who was doing it. He had taken everything and given it to a charity that helps the Citizens in the area. In the end, I had to arrest all the shopkeepers, the robber and the ones in the charity who knew they were receiving stolen goods. The victim's perspective now had three sides. That of the shopkeepers who were robbed, that of the clan who was used, and that of the charity who received a mark against their name because of their actions.

“The villains perspective now also had three sides. That of the clan member’s who was taking what was owed and giving it to those who needed it, that of the shopkeepers who made false promises because they were afraid, and that of the charity workers who just wanted to help people.

“But the truly complicated perspective was mine. I was the hero that found all the criminals and did my duty to uphold the law. I was the villain who threw 20 people in jail, most of whom had families who would be hard pressed to support themselves without the missing members and destroyed the good name of a wonderful charity while I was at it. Tell me Celestia, who was evil? Who was good? What was justice or criminal activity? And what of me? What would you have done when faced with this?”

She stares at me calmly and for the first time since the library has a smile. “You are far too young to have faced such decisions. You were the hero and good, the robber was a criminal and evil and the charity members were the real victims. I would have locked away the thief and repaid the shopkeepers, only to levy them with a fine equal to what they promised and delivered the remaining balance to the new clan. Not that this makes your actions bad, you are simply too young to be holding such responsibilities. If anything you were yet another victim, forced to deal with the weight of all these wrongs. I hope that your time in this world can undo the damage your previous one has inflicted.”

I glare at her in annoyance. “So I’m damaged because I think differently than you?”

“You're a child who has been forced into a life of bloodshed and violence while shouldering the weight of your subjects. Back there in the village, you showed how damaged you are. Everyone afraid of you, all those friends you might have lost. Yet you remain unaffected by it.”

I cut her off with a snarl. “I don need ta be worried bout makin’ friends. I will do my duty and protect those weaker’n me while I’m here, I’ll maintain my honor while followin’ da rules and laws of dis land, but I’ll not make friends or attachments that’ll make it hard ta go home. What’s wrong with living a life dedicated to protectin’ others despite the costs? Is your ideal person the one who just runs when somethin’ is wrong even if they have the power ta protect others? We have a philosophy back home. With great power comes great responsibility.”

She matches my smoldering gaze with one of her own. Were it not for my anger fueling my doa I would be unable to meet her potent stare. “No, but protecting does not require endless bloodshed and killing. True power is not the ability to slay your opponents, but the mercy to let them live.”

“Since when have I ever said it did. I rarely was forced to kill and only ever did when I had to choose between da lives of my opponents or the life of myself or those I’m protecting or I when I lost control of-. Just because I’m not so weak that I would rather let my subjects all be slaughtered than stain my hands in blood does not make me damaged.”

“You consider not being able to end a life to be a weakness, think about how wrong that is.”

“You consider not being willing to stain your soul in defense of others even at the cost of their lives to be a strength. Maybe you’re the damaged one.”

By now Celestia has risen into the air as she glares at me and I’m standing on the now shaking chariot glaring back. Suddenly her gaze softens. “You know that killing is wrong right?”

I feel my anger still boiling but I’m not shouting anymore. My voice is still angry, but not as bad. “Of course, it is a horrible thing to end another's life. But it is far worse to allow them to kill others simply because you can’t bring yourself to do it. That is the purpose of the nobles. We protect the Citizens not just from being injured or slain by criminals, but also from the stains that result from protecting yourself from them.”

She nods and lands back inside the chariot. Now she looks almost sad. “I still say this is too much of a burden for one as young as you to bear. Perhaps I can trust you a little.”

“Enough to let me have my gear back? Just for training. I don’t want to get back to my world or have something come up here and be rusty.” I look at her pleadingly the anger completely faded. It’s hard for me to hold on to my emotions.

She looks conflicted than her face brightens in a smile. “Indeed, as long as you wouldn’t mind a demonstration. I’m curious how you wield such weapons without magic. That chain, in particular, would be difficult for even a unicorn to fight with without training.”

I smile happily as we begin the descent to the castle. The guards flying the chariot look relieved that this ordeal is almost over. They had been pretty scared during the argument. I start feeling guilty about losing my temper like that. “Hey, Celestia? Sorry about screaming at you like that. I’ve been doing my best to keep myself under control but all this is all kinda… well, it all sucks. I’ve been thinking lately and I can’t help but wonder how long I’m going to be living here. By the time I can go home will I even want to? I’ve already begun setting down some roots here. I made a couple friends, even if I did just get into a shouting match with one. What happens when I stop seeing the horses of my world when I look at ponies? When I start properly seeing them as people? More than that I know that if I didn’t have Shady waiting for me back home that I wanted to get back to I wouldn’t mind staying, not that I can survive in this world very easily.”

She looks surprised by my sudden stream of consciousness that was more fitting of Johnny than me. “I apologize for getting worked up myself. Actually, I was also annoyed, despite my best efforts to the contrary, racism remains an issue. How much would my ponies freak out if they knew that our greatest allies the griffons had to eat meat as part of their daily diet? I assume that is what you were referring to about finding survival here difficult? I assure you that fish is an easy and simple solution.” She looks away and I see a hint of shame. “I may have over-reacted, I am unused to someone who won’t back down in front of me.”

I chuckle and give her a quick hug. “Heh, perhaps our conflicting philosophies will help each other. Assuming we can discuss them without shouting from now on.”

She breaks into a laugh of her own at that as we get off the chariot. She leads me down to the kitchen and has them prepare a griffin meal. I sit down to a filling and tasty meal accompanied by Celestia who devours a slice of cake that could pass as a whole cake back home. Then again with the price of sugar the way it is, all the cakes I’ve seen here are oversized to an extreme.

It puts a strange thought in my head and I ask without thinking. “Celly, do you think that all this sugar so easily available is the reason ponies are so nice?”

She stares at me with the fork frozen halfway to her mouth. She swallows and with a disbelieving stare says a single word. “Celly?”

“Er, right sorry Princess Celestia. I’ve kinda got a habit of giving nicknames to people. So what do you think?” Now that the thought crossed my mind I have to seek out the answer. Is all the sugar the reason ponies are always nice and friendly? Wait, they aren't always friendly, back in Ponyville, I’m pretty sure the princess grabbed me before they could run me out of town. All because I was honest.

“If you're going to be so informal as to use a nickname on accident, at least say Tia. I am not a musical instrument.”

“Okay, I meant about the sugar thing, though.”

She stares at me again as she considers the question she hadn’t noticed before. “Kat, is sugar rare in your world?”

“It’s pricey. Sugar beets is a crop that has to widespread profits to be viable as a cash crop and requires too much processing to make it a sustenance crop. Maple on the other hoof… hand! I will not go native, dang it! Er… maple is somewhat hard to grow in my area and it takes a lot to produce enough to be worth export, so it’s even more expensive. It is more easily available, though, as it is a viable cash crop. Sugar cane has both of those problems and I’ve never even seen it in person. Honey however is the most commonly used sweetener in my area, but ever since bees evolved to use ki…” I shudder and trail off, I was only three years old during the plague of Kibees. Masters from around the world had to band together to stop them and get control of them. Nowadays beekeeping is considered a hobby worthy of nobles as it is dangerous and highly profitable.

She watches my face darken at the thought as I finish off my food as her face gets that look she has whenever we talk about my world. “Were it not for Shady, would you still be obsessed with returning?”

I start to speak than close my mouth as I think about it. This world is beautiful, full of happiness and the problems of my world are horrible abstract concepts to the people that live here. Yet I can’t help but feel I don’t belong. “Yes, even if everypony accepts me then I’m still out of place here. A warrior in a peaceful land, a noble who is unneeded. This world has no place for a creature like me.”

“Not everything is always perfect here, Cat. There have been many times in recent years that I wished I had warriors to protect everypony. Not to mention that there are places outside of Equestria that I wish I had warriors to dispatch to help. When the cloud demons attacked the Iron Mountains, I deployed a squad of my best pegasi. The griffons sent them back and told them there was no place for them on the battlefield. I could not leave and aid them myself, My duties kept me chained here. Tell me, how would you have acted if you had been here and I had asked for help?”

“First of all, start at the root of the problem. Obviously, your military is lacking if other nations are treating your soldiers as a hindrance. So I would start by getting all the guards and recruits together and put them through some basics to discover who has the innate abilities for quick training. Then I would take the elites and put them through the kind of training that leaves them with two options, get stronger or die. As they are training under my regimen I would go to the Iron mountains and study the cloud demons. When I have their weaknesses and strengths figured out I would return and prepare the troops for the fight.

“When I think they're ready we return and assist the griffons, if they tell us to go home I’ll laugh and tell em the battlefield is my home. I know this is a bit long term, but I myself cannot effectively fight airborne opponents. I would suggest letting me take a look at your military. I can figure out how to push it to the next level and if you want me to, turn your guards into soldiers.”

“Excellent, I assume you're capable of sparring without hurting your opponent seriously?”

“Of course, as long as they are not in my kill zone. The area between weak enough I can defeat them without hurting them and being strong enough to weather my serious attacks. Don’t worry, I can tell when they are in that range and will stop the fight.”

“Wonderful, let's go to the vault to collect your things. I’m interested in the material they are created from.”

“Tartarite, I don’t know much about it, no one does except the masters who create it. It is made by the Forge of Tartarus covenant. Anyone who knows the secrets of it is sworn to never leave their fortress and die before they betray the secret.”

“Why is there such secrecy involved? If they are willing to sell the metal, why is the method of creation such a secret?”

I laugh.”It is the way of my people, the sins were taken down a peg, but still they remain. As long as the Elements of Harmony exist, so too will the Sins of Discord. Here perfection is not a dream, but in my world balance is always maintained. If you have good luck than you will receive bad luck. For every saint, there is a sinner. Honesty, deception, loyalty, hubris, generosity, greed, kindness, wrath, laughter, envy, magic and corruption.”

“So they are greedy?”

I shake my head, she really isn’t getting it. “They are proud of their achievement, greedy of their profits, loyal to their covenant and much more. Duality is the way of things in my world. Nothing is ever black or white.”

“So what of you? You seem a hero, a truly good stallion. What is your duality?”

I look at her with fear and sadness. I had hoped never to answer this, or talk about him. “I have a dark side, I have bathed myself in the blood of my people. I’m glad I barely need sleep, for when I dream my darkest hours are always replayed. Sometimes I lose control of my…” I trail off trying to find the words and force them past the lump in my throat. I manage one more word that makes Celestia stare at me alarmed. “Demon.”

Author's Note

I'm finally back, it's sooooo good to have internet again. I shall now unleash an epic torrent of pony words of epicness! So yeah, I'm back, time to start this story up again along with the others.

Chapter 6

Chapter 6
“Sometimes I lose control of my...Demon.”

Celestia freezes in the middle of reaching a wing towards me and stares at me in alarm. She seems to decide something and relaxes a small amount. “Kat, what exactly is a demon to your people?”

I look away in shame. “The embodiment of corruption, beings of immense power and evil. Sometimes they find humans they like and merge with them somehow. The human ends up with the demon living inside them, constantly fighting to keep control of the demon. There's no way to be rid of it or to tame it. There is only learning to master yourself and your emotions. Never give in to the temptation and keep yourself as pure as possible.”

I have turned around, unable to bring myself to face her. Her voice is soft and unreadable. “Temptation? How is it tempting?”

I whirl and face her feeling a slightly insane look spreading on my face. “Because they can offer more power than a mortal is supposed to ever have. When he broke free when I was younger I broke a grand master’s jaw. All that power, the whispers that you’re different, special, that you can control this power, unlike all the others. The greatest torment of those who are possessed by this. The constant knowledge that you don’t ever have to lose. That losing is a choice, that if you just let it in you will not lose to anyone ever. Except… except you will have lost to it.”

She stares at me in shock and I continue sadly. “I would have fallen long ago, a lost soul to be destroyed by my clan, were it not for three things. I learned these from my hero, Emeris. Gardening, gaming…” I cut off as a different emotion grips me and shake my head clearing all the emotion and forcing focus. My voice is almost a monotone now. “Shady and my friends. They helped me get through the darkness because they reminded me how much light I still had.”

She looks concerned. “What exactly does it take to trigger this demon of yours?”

“I need to be fighting an opponent who has or will do something unforgivable who I cannot defeat under my own power. Grogar for example. There are other less common ways, attempts at mind control, drugs that sap my will and obscure my mind so I don’t realize I’m drawing on my demon’s powers. Theoretically, it can also be triggered when I’m sleeping and having a nightmare, however, I have learned lucid dreaming to combat this.”

She looks at me strangely. “You remember your dreams? Enough to control them?”

I nod. “When I actually have them that is, usually it’s just memories or impressions. Now, weren't we off to collect my things and meet the foals I’m supposed to be turning into guards?”

She seems to let the subject change pass because she leads me through the castle. It feels good to be reunited with my blades and Celestia gets a blush when I hug them happily and say without thinking. “Celestia and Luna I’ve missed you. Now you're back in my arms where you belong.”

With the heavy awkward silence that brings I belt and clip all my gear on, feeling a lot better with the accustomed weight of my things on me once again. She leads me through the castle again as we discuss much safer topics. I learn more about this world’s other races. The buffalo tribes of the plains, the zebrican tribes and their ruling council, the griffin empire of the iron mountains, the other pony lands such as Prance and Neighpon. So many nations who all meet here in Equestria for their ambassadorial summits. She expresses a desire for me to meet the griffin ambassador, we have a lot in common, despite “For once someone can understand the griffons from the perspective of being an, even more, extreme example.”

Turns out that the biggest reason no one messes with Equestria is the dual problem of no one remembers the spell to move the sun and moon, and no one wants to cross Celestia. She doesn’t come right out and say it, but I know exactly what that tone of voice saying “aggressive negotiations” and “came to the decision it would be in the best interest of surviving members of the griffin royal family to end the war” really means.

Finally, she takes me to where the guards are practicing under the direction of a unicorn with a shield cutie mark. Celestia introduces us. “Captain Shining Armor, I would like you to meet my guest, Lord Katdestro Ironheart.” He gets an annoyed expression as he extends a hoof to me.

I take his hoof and shake it, shaking a hoof feels weird. I grin at Celestia “For the love of Death, call me Cat. That sounds presumptuous and weird.” Shining Armors annoyed expression goes away as I smile at him. “So I take it you're the one in charge of this group?”

He grins. “Yup, I’m captain of the royal guard, the best of the best-”

I cut him off. “From what I hear, your best isn’t good enough. I want to see exactly what I’m working with here. What makes a guard in this world, what are you doing wrong in your training, what are you not doing right enough? Show me.”

He gets an arrogant grin. “Alright step in with the soldiers. Let's start with 20 pushups!” He finishes calling out to the guards. A groan goes up unchecked without any reprimands. I watch as the guards get down and slowly crank out the pushups.

“Are you going to do them or are you really gonna stand there after all that talk?”

I drop and rip through the 20 and pop to my feet to stare down at him. “20? Is that all you can do? When you can’t figure out where to start, simply grab the closest loose thread. You have no idea anything about me, so you think that a noble from my world is the same as one of these pathetic excuses for a caste that exist here. So, let’s start with a sparring match, your best soldier, or you as the case may be, versus me.”

He gets a soft smile. “Anything goes?”

“No killing or permanently or maiming your opponents and no using tactics that would fail outside of a sparring match.”

“Like what?”

“Like charging me purposely leaving yourself open knowing I have to hold back so I don’t kill you. Now let's start.”

I draw my blades and back off dipping into a traditional swordsman’s bow before slipping them back into their sheaths. His horn glows and a blast of magic flies at me. I Step sideways and then directly to him intending to slug him in the jaw and end this. However, my fist slams into a strange bubble. He grins at me from inside it as his horn glows with a strange crackling energy. I draw my blades and slash furiously at the shell, but to no avail.

The shield drops for a moment and 20 balls with silvery trails shoot out. Shotgun attack? I roll to the side and my sai alerts me of a threat behind me, twisting around I see them coming back. “Son of a bitch,” I swear as I roll and take a rising dawn stance to parry the bolts. Luckily my swords can knock them away, unluckily it seems that Shining is controlling them so they're not just mindless.

“Mages are always such cheat characters,” I grunt out managing to deflect one into his shield. I notice he hasn’t taken a single step since firing off these missiles.

“Especially when they roll natural D-20s across the board.”

I point at him with an excited smile. “You’re a gamer! That’s so- Crap!”

With the distractions, one of the balls slams into my chest and knocks me backward into two more of them. I force my body to slam the ground and roll sideways before springing to my feet to break the combo he almost got off. Counting the three that landed just now I’ve destroyed a total of 12 leaving 8 remaining. His horn is still glowing softly. I don’t think he can charge them while he’s controlling them. My mind flows over the details I have while I try and deflect the remaining 8 at him.

His shield is impenetrable, including to his own attacks. He had to drop it to fire this spell for the offense.

He can drop and raise it before I can Step inside.

His projectiles were a lot clumsier at first, but now that there are less they are a lot harder to beat.

This projectile spell cannot be charged while he’s controlling it.

He isn’t showing any signs of exhaustion and is still smiling with the happy look of a fellow gamer planning strategy. On the positive side, this is pretty much the exact same as one of my daily exercises so I’m not tiring either. My armor seems to have protected me from the worst of the damage.

He doesn’t track my Steps with his eyes, but rather his instincts told him to block. Looking deeper, I sense a strong sai ki buried beneath that weird energy I believe to be magic.

My weapons have some form of magical resistance and he winces every time the metal touches his shield.

I grin as my plan comes together while I deflect another ball into his shield. Only two left and I don’t bother wasting the time to deflect them instead letting them slam into my chest relying on my armor. He’s sitting inside his shield charging the shotgun spell again now and I spring into action. I release a length of my chain and slip hook it to itself spinning it like a lasso and throwing it around his shield. He looks surprised by the tactic as the chain wraps around his shield. I bear down and pull it tight. Next I plant my staff deep into the ground and wrap my chain around it. Satisfied with the first steps complete I leap on top of his shield and hold the chain tight as he looks at me with a strange expression.

I sit happily on top of his shield and grin at him. “Check.”

He drops the spell he was readying with a sigh and flexes his muscles. He cuts the shield spell and leaps straight at me trying to land a hoof in my face. Wonderful I was worried all he had was his magic. A grin flows across my face and I twist out of the way and flick the chain up around the staff to reel it in as he lands. His horn flashes and another bolt of magic goes flying at me. This one is way faster than the shotgun spell and I can barely Step out of the way in time.

“Your magic is pretty impressive, how can you call mages cheat characters when you're a rogue and a tank?” He has a grin on his face and seems to be enjoying himself.

I laugh at this. “I can’t use magic, just ki, unlike you who actually does have both.”

He looks at me confused. Oh yeah, he probably has no idea what ki is. Stepping backward, I retrieve my staff and Step next to him. He responds by catching the blow with his shield. Unlike last time he drops it and responds by trying to hit me with a double legged back kick. A fatal error. I catch the two hooves and lift him off the ground. He curls up and shoots me with a spell point blank with a spell that knocks me backward and drops him on his head.

Dizzy we both struggle to our feet eyeing each other with a new appreciation. I draw my blades and take the eternal twilight stance.

“Let me show you how these blades were meant to be used, I will teach you the power of twilight.”

He grins and starts laughing much to my confusion. “I already know about the power of Twilight. I’m her BBBFF after all.”

“Er? Um… I’ll ask after I beat you.” I release my sai completely and Step behind him with a small winch as a jarring pain shoots through my leg. Swinging my blades, I slap him with the flat of Luna drawing a line of blood where I swung too hard. He stands there staring at me with a dazed expression as I meet his eyes calmly. “Touch.” My voice has the almost monotone quality of when I have killed my emotions and gone completely into the zen of sai.

Letting my mind return to normal I turn to Celestia with a grin. “Well, I don’t know how much I can help. I was giving it my best and I can tell he was holding back a lot. If this is the power of your guards than your army is already beyond me outside of helping some of the weaker cadets out.”

She looks at me with a grave expression. “Shining armor is special, his sister is Twilight, the Element of Magic and he is one of the most powerful unicorns in all of Equestria. He is perhaps the strongest guard in history, outclassing his next best by several tiers. He is of course not as diverse as others and lacks the talent for many types of magic, however, his shield spells are on the level of an alicorn.”

I look around me with this new information. “Your top soldier that isn’t you. Bring them to me.”

He looks worried. “You're not going to hurt them are you? You could have done permanent damage with that finishing blow you used on me if it were most other ponies.”

“Alright, that’s all I wanted to know really. So if you consider Celestia and Luna to be in the Elder Grand Master tier, my races description for when a person has a power that can never be calculated, demi gods such as Emeris, then you are what passes for a grand master class. Celestia, I take that back I have my work cut out for me. Now, let’s go address my troops.”

I stand in front of the guards who stopped their training to watch the sparring match. As I stare at them wanting to say something I get a strange feeling in me. A strange sense of that energy that I believe to be magic pouring into me from all around me and back out into the world. Music starts playing out of nowhere and against my will despite feeling a strange sense of joy, I begin signing.

“Let's get down to business

To become so much more

Did they send me foals when I asked for mares?”

But I didn’t ask for anything. What’s going on? And wouldn’t I have asked for stallions? Wait, if I’m learning how to read genders right, why are their only a couple of stallions here?

“You're the saddest bunch I ever met

But you can bet before we're through

Filly, I'll make a mare out of you”

Okay, so at least that made more sense other than sounding a little creepy and slightly rapey. But why can’t I control my body? Why am I dancing and singing? Better yet why does no one look surprised? Oh for the love of Death I’ll just go with it.

“Tranquil as a forest

But on fire within

Once you find your center

You are sure to win

You're a spineless, pale, pathetic lot

And you haven't got a clue

Somehow I'll make a mare out of you”

Alright, that was actually good. Inspiring and demeaning at the same time like a proper drill sergeant. Now the guards begin training again and start singing as well. How do they know the words? How are they all so well timed?

“I'm never gonna catch my breath”

“Say goodbye to those who knew me”

“Boy, was I a foal in school for cutting gym”

“This guy's got 'em scared to death”

“Should have listened to what Echo told me”

“Now I really wish that I knew how to swim”

Now they are all singing in perfect unison with me, what the actual…

“Be a mare

We must be swift as a coursing river

Be a mare

With all the force of a great typhoon

Be a mare

With all the strength of a raging fire

Mysterious as the dark side of the moon”

Okay, I like that last bit. It has a nice ring and is really what I’m going for here.

“Time is racing toward us till conflict arise

Heed my every order and you might survive”

I round on a guard struggling to keep up with everyone, they actually look like they have some type of terminal illness and I can only sense a tiny amount of any kind of energy from them.

“You're unsuited for the rage of war

So pack up, go home you're through

How could I make a mare out of you?”

They start singing together with me as the weak unicorn sullenly trots off.

“Be a mare

We must be swift as a coursing river

Be a mare

With all the force of a great typhoon

Be a mare

With all the strength of a raging fire

Mysterious as the dark side of the moon”

“Be a mare

We must be swift as a coursing river

Be a mare

With all the force of a great typhoon

Be a mare

With all the strength of a raging fire

Mysterious as the dark side of the moon”

The music dies down and I regain control of myself. I round on Celestia. “What in da name of Death’s skeletal ballsack was that allabout? What the actual fuck just happened? I think I was mind controlled or somethin’, and who was playing dat music? What? How? No, no... no… why? Why was dat a thing?”

She is watching me with an amused expression and I see her fighting back the laughter. “It was just a Heartsong, Cat. It’s perfectly normal. It is part of the magic of Equestria.”

I blink at her with a stupid expression. “So, lemme get dis straight. Songs just happen for no reason and because magic music just pops up from nowhere and everyone knows da words, which is convenient because even the main singer in the entire thing doesn’t have a clue what they will sing or do next?”

A small giggle escapes her before she give me a dead serious expression and flatly says “exactly right.” As I facepalm in agitation she finally breaks down laughing and I hear a chorus of laughter behind me. Good something familiar to focus on. I round on the guards with a happy smile.

“Good to see you all still have so much energy! It’s great cause you're gonna need it. Let’s start with a warmup to burn off that energy so you can listen in rapt attention. Give me 50 pushups.”

Several of them start grumbling and they are slow to get in position.

“Oh, you even have so much energy you think I care about your complaining? Let’s add another 20 to make sure you get back to thinking rationally!”

They look at each other with fearful expressions as they take their positions, they're slow to start, but since they do it without a peep I'll let it slide. For now, anyways. After all, this is our first day of training and I haven't even given them a proper introduction. I watch them all with satisfaction. If I gauged this lot perfectly then most will be unable to give me all 70 of them. The first one to collapse is a leaf green unicorn. Studying them more closely it seems that the earth ponies are handling this with a slow steady effort that is leaving them a lot less tired than I had expected, the pegasi are ripping through it quickly but are getting burnt out. The unicorns, however, they are slow and burning out quickly.

There are exceptions, of course, their are pegasi who are pacing themselves with the earth ponies and unicorns who are performing them quickly. Most impressive, however, is a pegasus mare who is burning through them quickly and slowly starting to release a doa ki. I walk over to this one. They have a white coat with a vibrant yellow mane and are wearing an expression of barely contained rage. A beserker perhaps? Or are they simply unused to the emotional fallout of their emerging ki?

“Name and rank soldier,” I speak quietly.

“Tornado Volley, private.” Her voice sounds edgy but also slightly fearful.

“Why are you angry private,” I ask softly if she is a berserker I don’t want to tip her scales for the first time outside of a contained environment.

She freezes and her doa fades. “I don’t know sir, I was trying to push myself and I found something deep, it made me feel good but… angry.”

“Well squad leader Tornado, I can and will explain it to you, but it’s gonna cost yah.”

“Cost? Wait, what’s a squad leader?” She gives me a disbelieving look and I yell to the recruits.

“Everyone I want you to look at young Tornado here and say thank you. She just bought you a break. Fall in, it's time for a proper introduction.”

They fall in sluggishly according to ranks and Tornado stares at me questioningly. She has no idea what a squad leader is or where to fall in. “Park it in the front, I need you for a demonstration anyways. After all, you did buy this break for everyone.”

“You didn’t answer the question about cost, though.”

I grin at her. “You paid by teaching me that both sai and doa exist in ponies and can occur naturally. This is the knowledge that is worth all the pushups everyone already owed me. Now, I am The Prince of Cats, Lord Katdestro Demonosa Ironheart, the Shadow Reaper and Wrathbearer. But you fine guards have earned the right to call me sensei. It is a word that means master, teacher, protector and the one who will always seek to make you better and show you the right path, as long as you are willing put forth an effort and continue stepping along the path they show you.

“Now, I will make all of you who can survive my training stronger and show you the path to becoming so much more than you are now. I will make sure that I can always make you into the best you can be, even if I have to bleed for it. Now this comes with a price and if you want something extra from me you have to pay more. For example, I want all of you to show me what you are truly capable of right now before I make you better and so you paid me some pushups. Now, squad leader Tornado over here has unlocked her doa and wants me to teach them how to use it. But their gonna hafta pay.”

I point a finger at the alarmed pegasus. “Front and center. Look over these and pick five of them. They should be the ones you would want to have your back in a battle against insurmountable odds. If you can’t pick all right now that is fine, after all, this is a permanent choice and being hasty is never good. As for what you're paying me, well I want an oath that you will be their rock. No matter what, you will do your best to lead them properly, the first to charge and the last to run.”

She looks at the group and immediately shouts two names. “Boulder and Sparks front and center.”

A large earth stallion with a treebark brown coat and dark mane that is almost black comes forward alongside a small unicorn with a cyan coat and mane. Quite the diverse group and I can tell that they are all friends from the smiles. Tornado turns to me with a questioning expression. “I don’t know anypony else well enough to decide, but I know I can always count on them. Will this do for now?”

“Quite nicely, now the rest of you say hi to squad one. I will be subdividing all of you into squads when I find someone leadership worthy. For now, let’s see what else I can awaken, I’m giving you a choice. Stand on one leg for as long as posible or hold up a large rock for as long as possible. When you fall or drop the boulder you may take a five minute break, but then you will resume you can switch tasks if you think you're better suited for one. This will last until sunset and I expect to see the smiles of ponies who are enjoying themselves by sunset.”

With this I smile at the horrified expressions I’m met with. They have no idea what I am doing and I finally understand what it feels like to be a true sensei and helping others find their hidden potential. Tornado predictably chooses the rock after her wings are bound. Horn suppressors and wing bindings are crucial to my plan after all. Now I see another interesting racial feature. Earth ponies almost all chose the rock, pegasi the standing and unicorns seem split and indecisive. After a few hours of wandering the ranks and getting to know the guards a little better, it finally begins. An earth pony suddenly smiles a true genuine smile and I sense a doa beginning to trickle from them. Nearby a unicorn gets a similar smile as their sai are likewise unleashed. After another hour, several of the pegasi and earth ponies are smiling much to the confusion of the unicorns, most of whom are still struggling in the task they chose.

After having been contemplating it for a while, it suddenly occurs to me. I Step in front of the first unicorn to achieve ki and catch them as they fall over in shock with their concentration broken. “How powerful are you at magic?” I ask her.

“Not very. I can use basic telekenisis and some spells, but I’m not very powerful.” She looks sad to admit this and I step to the next unicorn to achieve the release of their ki, this time, a doa type. I receive a similar response. Worried I Step off the where Shining is.

“This is really important. You have an energy deep inside of you that gets stronger the more you focus your mind and master your emotions, are you aware of it?”

He looks surprised. “I am actually, I was born with a rare condition known as alienis. It is where you have a foreign energy in your body that is at odds with your magic. It can cause you to become completely unable to use magic at all and instead the two are constantly at war with each other. I, however, found that meditation and concentrating on the two energies kinda untwisted them from each other. I don’t know how to properly describe it. I worked hard to learn magic while also learning to control this energy as well. In the end, they actually began working with each other in certain areas. My shield spells, for example, draw on both the pools of energy and have a tendency to activate themselves when I’m in danger.”

I stare at him in surprise and place my hands on his side earning a weird look from several ponies including Shining himself. I focus my sai and reach my sense inside him trying to see his energy. He shudders when my sense brushes the two pools of energy within him. Interesting it seems that the pool of ki exists on a different path through his body than the pool of magic, however, there are places where the paths of the magic or sai feel artificial. He is an Altered I discover, a fledgling Altered, but still he has changed his body with his training. I release him and step back.

“Thanks, that taught me a lot and may have saved a lot of ponies trouble.”

I turn back to the group. “Unicorns fall in and I need a couple of volunteers from each race of ponies for a ki examination. It will feel a little weird, however I need to be certain that training your ki won’t block off your ability to use magic ever again.”

Lots of scared and angry looks, but thankfully lots of hooves in the air as volunteers. I Step next to another unicorn, one who had no success in achieving ki. My sense reveals they do possess ki, however, their large flow of magic has completely blocked the flow. The unicorn who found their sai first the magic is already flowing wrong so the two flows do not interrupt each other. Her mana pool is fine however the paths the mana fallows is wrong compared to the other unicorn. The two earth ponies have matching flows that actually seem to compliment the flow of ki to the point that they are essentially interchangeable.

The three pegasi show one who has patterns similar to a unicorn who when questioned reveals his father to be a unicorn. Another one who is a weak flyer shows the same complimenting patterns as an earth pony and I discover that the only pegasi in their heritage are their grandmother. The final one shows a pattern where the ki is channeled deep within the body but the mana flows close to the skin and infuses the wings. The two never come close to each other as a result of this.

I Step over to Shining again. “So case by case basis, unicorns generally are unable to use their ki without training to change their flow. Earth ponies generally have complimenting flows of mana and ki that result in harmony between the two and pegasi have completely separated flows of energy, most likely all these result from the various ways the races use their magic. So, in short either you need to teach unicorns how to alter the flows, or I need to separate them into different types of training. The earth ponies need to master their ki and their magic together. The pegasi won't be able to use their ki to help with flying, so an extensive focus on ki would actually detract from their training. Unicorns, on the other hand, ki is damaging to them without extensive, possibly impossible, training. What do you think?”

He looks at me with a grin. “So basically, we need to have them all pick classes and train their skills based on their class? Learning to use your ki as a unicorn is dangerous and only has benefits if it falls into your fighting style. I think that while this ki training should be mostly mandatory for earth ponies, pegasi and unicorns should be informed of exactly all the risks and possible benefits and decide for themselves. I say keep all of them together for the most part and separate them into groups based on what they want to learn and what they have an aptitude for.”

“You really need to show me this world’s version of D&D, I love gaming and it would be nice to have something familiar.”

He laughs. “Actually, me and some of my friends are having a meetup to play tonight because Echo overworked herself and has tonight off. Want to come and hang out with us? You even get to meet my special somepony! You’ll like Cadence, she is the sweetest most beautiful mare in Equestria.”

I shoot him a rogue grin. “Now is that you're completely honest unbiased opinion?” He laughs with me at the little joke. “I would love to, it sounds like fun just tell me when and show me where.”

He agrees and we finish the day with nothing more than an improved version of the usual routine, I cannot risk actual training until I do more research. Shining tells me we can head to where they meet up a little early to get set up. I’m happy and excited about the gaming, and then Shining has me help carry a large barrel of hard cider… Did I ever mention I was 17?

Author's Note

Yaya another chapter, obligatory Mulan reference applied as needed and the beginning of a beautiful friendship/rivalry between Shining and Kat. Let me tell you a secret, Shining just lost for the first time in his life, he's a chill bro so he's not mad, but Kat had better watch out because Shining is going back to training every day and will not be underestimating him again. Next time a meet up with a certain adorable night guard and a powerful pretty pink pony princess providing particularly problematic personification. (don't ask, I don't know why I did that either.)