Snippets from "True Harmony"

by rubyshimmer

Guilt

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Crystal Heart's mind was awhirl as she galloped down the boulevard. Maybe if she got back before Diamond, she could finish, maybe her sister wouldn't notice. 'I'm so sorry', she thought, 'I can't do it, I can't do anything'. her breath was short and tears came to her eyes. 'I had a whole day, but I didn't even start'. Her guilt swelled up in her chest, like a balloon, pushing on her heart and lungs, constricting her breath.  ' No. Not now. I need to focus, I have to get this done'. The shop was in sight, she could still do it. She threw open the door, rushed inside, carefully circumnavigated many shelves of enchanted trinkets, leapt over the counter, and dashed into the back room. 'Shitshitshitshitshit' There sat Diamond Eye, forehead scrunched and lips pursed in her ever present frown, as her magic carved chunks off a small block of Quartz, flinching each time a piece was separated from the whole. That was it, there was no way her sister hadn't noticed her, even so she frantically backpedaled, as if it could somehow save her from the inevitable scolding. Her tail was painfully pinned to her flank by the very counter she had previously leapt over. The sudden pain caused her to stumble and fall onto the floor. She didn't bother getting up.

"Just stop." the other mare in the room scowled in Crystal's direction. "Please"

"I'm sorry. I tried and tried but, but, but-" Crystal whimpered

"No you didn't, if you had tried there would actually be something done, and there's not"

Crystal flinched away from her sister, her ears splayed back "Diamond, you don't understand, I-"

"Just stop, you know whining doesn't help your case, or my headache, so just shut up, and pay attention" Diamond snorted, then turned to gesture to the shelves around her, "this is how we make a living, you know that. You gave up everything to come with me, but if you're just dead weight, I can and will boot you all the way back to Saia. Your job is to carve gem and crystal, mine is to enchant it, when I have to do both jobs, less gets done, it's sloppier, and I get a headache. Your talent is sculpting, you're the only one who is accurate enough to do it right, and you need to stop slacking off, this is our livelihood. You-" She cringed and collapsed on the bench, letting her horn dim. The half-finished statuette fell to the table with a heavy thunk.

"Diamond Eye!" Crystal sprung up from the floor and rushed to a shelf, her face contorted with fear for her sister. She grabbed a small pearl from a bowl and dropped it on the table in front of Diamond. Diamond, teeth clenched in pain, lifted her head. The pearl was surrounded in a pulsing turquoise aura, followed by a strand of the same color lashing onto it from Diamond's horn and wrapping it in light. The aura dimmed, but the pearl glowed for just a second after it had dissipated. Diamond's emerald eyes dilated for a second before gaining a sparkle that had been absent before.

"By the Queen, I needed that" she groaned and turned to face Crystal once again. Her momentary smile reversed itself. "You still aren't off the hook."

"I'm so sorry, I-I should've gotten my work done, I should've th-thought about what happens when you try to do my work, and I-I-I-" Crystal's voice shook, and tears escaped eagerly from the corners of her eyes, "I didn't-I didn't think, and now you're paying the price. I always act guilty, but I-I don't think I really am. It f-feels like an act Di, even th-this feels like an act, this crying about b-being nothing, it feels like I'm just i-imitating what I've seen," she let herself collapse onto the floor, sobbing, "What am I Di. I f-feel like nothing, I-I can't get anything done, no matter how hard I try, but d-do I really try?" Diamond walked over and lay down next to her sisters back, holding her, "I'm nothing, Di, but I want so bad to be s-something, I want to be able to do anything to make anything, and I can, but I n-never do..." Sobs racked her body, and it was clear she was still talking, but her speech had degraded to intelligible murmuring, "...gystpwally'reningandIshingbou'remwtesttmakemeithingicsnetnythionennothillneingnpidworitymebutawartofmeoneshunbuticiitwill..."

"Shhhhh, just stop," Diamond gently cooed into her sister's ear, "you're more than this if you let yourself be. You're right though, you can't do anything laying on the ground here. Please, don't do this to yourself, my Mark isn't your fault, you slacking off is, and that's all you need to remember. You're everything, Crys, kind, loving, joyful. If you mess up a couple times, you're equine. If you sob on the floor every time, you're over-dramatic. Just don't do this to yourself, you don't deserve it. You're so much more than me, you can be so much more than me, I'll never be more than what I am, because of my Mark. It forces me to do one thing, it makes it deadly to focus on anything else. But you have freedom, your Mark is kinder, you can do what you wish, your Mark is just a reminder. I want that so badly Crys, but I would take double the burden if you didn't have to." Crystal whimpered and cried, even as her sister snuggled up against her, but her tears flowed more sedately than before. She had needed this.

"I love you so much Di, I don't know what I'd do without you."

They lay like that for a long while, letting Crystal cry herself to sleep, and even after that. Eventually, as began to get dark outside, Diamond quietly stood up and lifted her sister onto her back. A rare smile graced her face as she carried her over to the back of the room, behind all the shelves. She carefully set her on one of the two cots, kissing her on the cheek before climbing up onto the other.

"I love you to Crys" Diamond whispered.

Then her eyes closed and sleep took her.