Luna was stirring a big sticky tub of Oreo cream. The blue alicorn shivered as the air conditioning was turned up. But it didn't stop there. A cute stallion was helping her stir it. But that caused her wings to pop out, creating a wingboner AND a giant gust that sent her flying into the tub of delicious confectionary. Nopony noticed this until the cream in the tub started dissapearing slowly, being sucked into Luna's mouth in her attempts to escape her white fluffy prison. Luna was able to teleport air into her lungs multiple times and created bubbles while exhaling. The cream was quickly scooped at with a large spoon. Four workers dragged the princess out of the tub and totthe nearest intensive care unit.
BEEP BEEP BEEP BEEP
Luna woke up to the smell of cooked oreo cream and realized that her mane was COVERED in it! She looked up and saw some doctors above her smiling.
She was sent home a few days after.
~Le time skip brought to you by Oreos and their amazing filling~
Luna still couldn't get the Oreo cream out of her mane. Celestia walked in with a razor. "Luna, your mane is a disgrace. Shave it. You can grow it back with magic." the alicorn said.
"It's my only option, Celie." And Princess Luna took the razor to her mane.
It got stuck in the cream. And it would not come out.
"BUCK! BUCKING FLIP! MOTHERBUCKING BUCK!" Luna yelled.
Celestia tried at it herself, but as it turns out, Luna's hair is a portal to another dimension. The razor simply disappeared into the mane, never to be seen again. Then Celestia tried a manajery of other weapons, including but not limited to
An airhorn
A CHAINSAW
An AK-47
A squid
More oreo cream
A fire hose
A sword made of diamond
A torpedo
And many other things.
Luna's next request was for the Society Of Magical Objects create a razor powerful enough to shave any mane, no matter what it had in or on it. The society worked all night on it. They created one, but it went through the portal. They analyzed an ancient spell that would prevent the portal from swallowing the razor. It worked, but it didn't go through the cream. They did a chemical analyzation of the cream and found a substance that disabled the adhesive-like stickiness. But the cream, now liquified, shut down the clippers. So they waterproofed it and installed a vacuum in them that when a liquid was sensed, it was sucked up. This disabled something, and they tried something more, and finally it kept on going until two weeks later, they had come up with a three foot long design with diamond tips, with magical mist-deactivating spray, a vacuum, and many other things. Luna grabbed the giant pair with her glowing magic. It was time.
The sound of a vacuum, a spray bottle, and a pair of clippers was heard as chunks of portal mane fell off of the alicorn. It was working! She moved onto her coat, and then her tail. She magically grew back the coat, but her mane appeared stuck in the now short style that it was. She sighed, knowing that alicorn manes take a few thousand years to grow two feet.
In support, Celestia gave up her mane's long length. That caused her to pass a law that nopony is allowed to have a mane longer than a foot. She wasn't exactly mentally sound, so when she calmed down the two of them passed a law, along with Twilight, that no pony is allowed to make a decision while not mentally sound. Luna locked away the clippers and vowed they would never be used again until it was needed for utter importance.
A few days passed. Luna read some fan mail, Celestia watched Markiplier, everything was fine. The pink part of Celie's mane had been magically formed into a WARFSTACHE, and they had had it royally delivered, by Celestia herself, to Markiplier. He was confused at first, but then looked at the newspaper.
BREAKING NEWS!
Accident at oreo factory causes both Princesses to get new manecut
Blahblahblahblah blah blah
He accepted it and featured it in his video... it featured Celestia as well. And she was wearing a second warfstache.
[I'm a markiplier fan, don't judge]
Celestia played some RPG games with him until she had to lower the sun. She went to lower the sun and went to bed. Luna rased the moon and did the same.
Life was normal.
Meanwhile in Ponyville
"And my fanfiction only has 700 words? Buck! I can't stand this! I need to write more filler and stuff! BUUUUUUUUUUU-"
Back in Canterlot
Celestia was making a rage comic about when her iPhone fell in the elevator shaft.
She decided to go to Freddy Fazbear's Pizza.
They obviously condemned the pizzeria. After kicking Foxy in the crotch for being overrated as buck. Multiple times. And then they dressed as Foxy and imitated him in a stupid way. Then they took home Bonnie because the rest of them suck.
And then she had Hearth's Warming Eve in July. Becuse she was a royal sovergein of Equestria. Nobody could usurp her throne. Nobody.
And then Luna realized something.
"Couldn't I have just eaten the cream rather than going through all that trouble to invent a pair of clippers powerful enough to cut a goddess's mane and then cutting my mane short?" Luna asked.
That day, Celestia sent her sister to the moon for a year so both of their manes could regrow.
Author's Note
YES, this is canon to real life in Fluttershy Obtains An Afro.
