The Only Chapter You`ll Have To Read
Discord was bored.
Ever since Fluttershy had went off on her two-week cruise to see aquatic animals, he had found himself with nothing to do. Rarity was always busy running her boutique, and she wasnt much fun anyway; Rainbow Dash and Pinkie were playing pranks; Twilight was busy with princess stuff; Applejack of course had the farm, and ironically, Spike still didnt trust him completely.
Discord sighed as he reclined upside down in his favorite armchair. He couldnt spread chaos and disorder everywhere like he usually did when he was bored. No, that would only get him turned to stone again, and he didnt think everyone was ready to forgive him again so soon after he betrayed them to help Tirek take over Equestria.
But wait, he was starting to get an idea. Discord hopped out of his armchair, and started pacing on the ceiling as an idea struck him. What if he took away something that ponies really loved, but didn`t love to the point that if he took it away, it would cause world-wide panic?
Hmmm....Clothes? No that would be too extreme...Books? Twilight would go all Tirek on me, better not..... Wait a minute! He had something!
Discord thought about it: it wasnt as good as hed like, but it was almost guaranteed to get a result. Shrugging, he snapped his eagle talons.
Righting his chair, he sat and fixed his TV so that it showed Ponyville instead of a regular station.
"This is going to be good..." he chuckled as he beckoned a bowl of popcorn from nowhere.
*******************
"Whoo-weew, it sure is ah hot one t`day!" Applejack commented, fanning herself vigorously with her stetson.
"It sure is!" Rainbow Dash agreed.
"Oh, what I wouldn`t give for some chocolate rain clouds right now!" Pinkie Pie panted.
The three ponies were sitting on Applejacks porch, reclining in her rocking chairs. Pinkie Pie and Rainbow Dash had just finished a day full of pranking and had come over Applejacks house to rest and escape the heat. Rainbow Dash rolled her eyes. "Pinkie, you know Discord made those clouds only when he messes up Ponyville right? Do you really-"
"All I remember is the creamy, chocolately, yummy-nummy goodness-"
"Pinkie, quit it!" Rainbow Dash said.
"Sorry." Pinkie replied, shrugging, and forced herself to stop panting.
"You know what would make this moment perfect?" Applejack sighed contently.
"CIDER!" Rainbow Dash shrieked instantly.
"Uh, no, I was goin` ta say if we had some lemonade...but, okay."
"So you ARE going to go get some cider?" Rainbow Dash asked, fluttering her eyelashes.
Applejack chuckled. "Only fer you RD."
"Aww, what about me?" Pinkie whined.
"And you too, Pinkie." Applejack chuckled again. She got out of her chair, and trotted over to the apple cellar. Rainbow Dash and Pinkie waited eagerly as they heard their friend`s hoofsteps disappear beneath the ground.
They waited a few minutes, and then they heard a horrified gasp. Pinkie and Rainbow Dash quickly exchanged a look before rushing over to the open door of apple cellar.
"AJ, are you okay?!" Rainbow Dash yelled down.
"You`re not dead, right?"Pinkie screamed, and Rainbow gave her a look.
Applejack walked back up the stairs, looking dazed. "All the cider-it`s gone!"
*******************
Sunlight shined brightly and unmercifully on the royal family as they lay in the royal gardens.
Celestia, Nadine, and Prince Blueblood were all sunning themselves. They were having a lovely time, spending what Celestia called "Important Family Time". Luna was of course absent, being asleep and all. Even though things weren`t exactly perfect between Nadine and Prince Blueblood, they were having a good time. But something was missing.
"Winter Blossom!" Celestia called to one of the guards standing next to them. "Please go and fetch one of the maids to and get the good stuff." She finished with a wink.
Winter Blossom winked back. "Yes, your highness."
Nadine watched the mare trot away, suddenly suspicious. "What did you mean by "the good stuff"?" she asked Celestia.
"Oh, you`ll see...." Celestia said evasively.
Nadine just gave her a quizzical look, before closing her eyes again. It was only a few minutes later when Winter Blossom came back shrieking hysterically. "It all vanished! All the cider is gone!"
"What?!" Celestia exclaimed jumping up from her seat.
"What do you mean it`s all gone?" Prince Blueblood gasped, quickly following his aunt.
"I searched everywhere. Even the normal stuff we drink at royal dinners is gone!"
"You mean-" Celestia started to say.
"Not. One. Single. Drop."
"But, that`s not possible!" Nadine said, as Prince Blueblood promptly fainted.
Winter Blossom just shrugged. "Whether it is or not, it`s all gone." She turned to Celestia. "Princess, what should we do?"
"Wake my sister, and notify the council. We`re having a War Council RIGHT NOW!" Celestia commanded, and all the guards quickly trotted away, leaving only one to tend to Prince Blueblood.
"Should we really-" Nadine began, but Celestia was already flying away.
****************
"TWILIGHT!" Rainbow screamed, as she hurtled through one of the castle`s windows. She crashed into a bookshelf, sending books flying and toppling over potted plants. Applejack and Pinkie Pie burst through the library door, breathing hard.
"Hey!" Twilight Sparkle exclaimed as a gust of wind from outside blew the papers she was studying off her desk.
"What the-?!" Spike said, tumbling out of his nest. "Owlowiscious and I just organized those!" Owlowiscious hooted angrily, agreeing with Spike, and gave the intruding ponies his strongest glare.
"Twilight, all the cider is gone!" Pinkie exclaimed, jumping on her desk, and looking her in the eye. "And we need to use the magic of friendship to get it back!"
"It all vanished!" Rainbow said, struggling to fight her way out of the pile of books she had landed in.
Twilight frowned. "Could somepony PLEASE explain what is going on in a calm and collected way?" she asked after depositing Pinkie on the floor, and neatly putting her papers back on the desk.
Rainbow Dash sighed as she clambered out of the pile of literature, and trotted over to Twilight. "This is no time for fancy words, Twilight! Somepony stole all of AJ`s cider!"
"What-" Twilight began, shocked.
"Now hold yer hay, girls!" Applejack said. "We dont know if somepony stole the cider. We jus know that its gone. " She plopped down on the ground. "Ah whole seasons worth...."
Twilight got out of her chair. "It`s just not probable!"
"Well, how about you come and see for yourself!" Rainbow said, and started to push Twilight towards the door.
"Okay, okay, Im going!" Twilight said, and turned to Spike. "Youre in charge while Im gone. If Princess Celestia sends a letter, just tell her Im investigating something, unless its urgent. If its urgent, come get me immediately."
"Whatever." Spike grumbled, as he climbed back into his nest.
Without another moment to spare, Twilight, Rainbow, Pinkie, and Applejack ran out the door.
***********************
"If I`m correct, your Highness, you want to declare war against the changelings?"
Luna slammed her hoof down on the table. "They`re the only ponies-creatures cable of this!"
"But we dont *know*. If we attack the changelings, then we find out it was the Griffins, well be wasting time!" Celestia pointed out.
"There is no way to know! I say we attack them all at once!" Luna said.
One of the council ponies shook her head. "That would take too much pony power. Whoever took the cider could come back and attack while our main defenses are away."
Celestia frowned. "Isn`t our army big enough?"
"I say we spy on everypony, and THEN attack who we think stole the cider." Another council pony recommended.
"We don`t have enough time for that. We need to act NOW!" Luna exclaimed.
"Are you ponies serious?" Nadine asked, looking around the table, astonished at what they were discussing. "Are we seriously considering going to war for cider?"
Every head in the room turned towards Nadine. "WHAT?!" Luna screamed, flying up into the air.
Nadine flinched. "I just don`t think we should be going through all this trouble for a drink."
A stunned silence filled the room, before Luna and Celestia exchanged a look. "Nadine, I thought you had changed." Celestia whispered.
"Guards, take her away!" Luna ordered, pointing her hoof at Nadine.
"What?" Nadine shrieked as two guards flanked her on either side. "This is madness!"
"I`m sorry sister, it just has to be this way!" Celestia called after Nadine.
"Well, Im not!" Luna said while crossing her arms. "I told you she wasnt ready to be good!"
"H-how long will you keep me?" Nadine asked.
"Until we can try you, and see if we can press charges for treason. Which will be after we find out what happened to all the cider. Farewell!"
"Now will somepony please get some parchment and ink so I can send Twilight Sparkle a letter?!" Celestia asked, as the doors closed behind her newly-arrested sister.
************************
"Well I sure believe you now!" Twilight said, wearing the same dazed expression Applejack had had when she had come out of the apple cellar. They were just walking into town, and no other pony seemed to know the cider was gone except them.
"This doesnt make any sense!" Twilight muttered, tapping her hoof on her chin. "Lets hope its just Applejacks apple cellar that`s out of cider."
"But Applejacks farm is the main supply for apple cider in Ponyville." Pinkie Pie pointed out. "If all her cider is gone, there wont be much left in Ponyville."
"WHAT?!" Rainbow shrieked. "We have to do something now!"
"Now calm down, RD!" Applejack said. "Ahm sure theres ah rational explanation for this. Uh, right, Twi?"
"There has to be!" Twilight exclaimed, straightening her stance. She turned around to face her friends. "Were all going to go back to the castle and figure this out, and Ill send a letter to the Princess. Theres no need to cause panic, so lets just let pretend everything`s nor-"
"ALL THE CIDER`S GONE!" Pinkie screamed from on a nearby building.
There was three seconds of silence as everypony in the Town Square took time to absorb the horrible news. Then all Tartarus broke loose. Ponies began to run around, gathering their foals, and trampling others in their desperate flight to get home and see if what Pinkie Pie said was true. Others collapsed where they had been standing minutes before sobbing hysterically, including Berry Punch who was lying on the ground moaning repeatedly, "It`s all over."
Applejack, Twilight, and Rainbow Dash all swiveled their heads and gave Pinkie a dirty look as a distant building burst into flames. Pinkie shrugged, putting on a nervous smile. "They were bound to find out sooner or later!"
"Pinkie-!" Twilight began angrily.
"TWILIGHT!" Spike yelled, running down the street and waving a scroll. "Letter from the Princess!"
***************
"Are you sure you have to do this?" Celestia asked, the worry clear in her voice.
Her and Luna were in the Armory, the latter getting suited up for battle. Luna sighed as she put on her midnight-colored helmet. "I have to go. You can beat me till I am blue, insult me until my ears bleed, and make me spend a week in Fluttershys shed. But you DO NOT, I repeat, you DO NOT take away a mares cider!"
"You do understand, right Celly?" Luna asked in a softer voice.
Celestia dipped her head slightly. "I do."
Luna picked up a sword in her dark blue aura and put it in its sheathe. "It`s time."
They wordlessly made their way out of the Armory, through the castle, and outside where the fleet was waiting for Luna. Celestia turned to her sister. "Do be careful."
Luna`s eyes softened. "Always."
With one more nod, Luna jumped into her chariot. "Onward!" she commanded and her fleet took off.
"She will be okay, right?" Prince Blueblood asked, walking up beside her as Luna and her fleet turned into tiny dots in the sky.
"Of course." Celestia answered absentmindedly.
"Is there anything I can do in the meantime?"
Celestia sighed. "No, not much. Keep calm, and hope this all gets sorted out. That is all we can do for now."
*******************
"I cannot believe this is happening." Rainbow Dash whispered.
Twilight, Applejack, Rarity, Pinkie Pie, and Rainbow Dash were on the train going to Canterlot. The letter that Princess had sent had requested their presence immediately; apparently all of Equestria was out of cider. They had left instantly after reading the letter, leaving Spike to "re-establish order".
The pony who was taking this the hardest was Rainbow Dash. She had her forelegs wrapped around her and was rocking back and forth in her seat. Her pupils were dilated, her ears kept twitching, and she was whispering things to herself. Her friends gave her concerned looks from time to time.
"This is just horrid!" Rarity exclaimed. "I`ve never been a big fan of cider-"
"CIDER!" Raibow shrieked, perking up. She looked at Rarity expectantly, but when she didn`t benefit the delicious drink she went back to her other stance and whispered, "No cider, no cider."
They all exchanged a alarmed look. Pinkie began to slowly creep towards Rainbow as if she were an wild animal. "Dashie?" she poked her with her hoof.
Rainbow lunged at Pinkie, teeth snapping. Pinkie quickly jumped back, and went back to her seat. "Maybe, we should just leave her alone.." she squeaked.
"Rainbow!" Rarity gasped, horrified. "How could you-"
Twilight shushed them as they came to a screeching halt. "We`re here."
****************
"Fillies, I`m so glad you could make it!" Princess Celestia welcomed them as they trotted into the throne room.
"Do you have any idea who could`ve taken the cider?" Rainbow Dash asked, not wasting time on introductions.
"Not for certain. Luna has already taken some of the army to go attack the changelings, and I`ve taken a large sum of them myself to go and ravage-Celestia coughed slightly-search Equestria for cider."
"Oh, that explains all those armored ponies we saw on the train!" Pinkie Pie exclaimed.
"Goodness, don`t you think that was a bit fast?" Twilight gasped.
"Yes, what if we find out it wasn`t the changelings, and we started a war for no reason?" Rarity asked, appalled.
Princess Celestia sighed. "I had to do something. Besides, I was outvoted on the changeling-war issue. I couldn`t do anything about it if I wanted to."
"Excuse me, yll, " Applejack interrupted, pulling her hat off her head respectively. "dont ya think we should think `bout who caused this chaos instead of what the repercussions will be?"
All their minds clicked at the same time: "DISCORD!"
***************
"Oh poo." Discord turned off the TV, his face sickly pale. He had only a few minutes to think before Celestia crashed through the window and tackled him to the ground.
Author's Note
