How I Lived In Equestria

Chapters

Chapter 1-2: "Official"
Chapter 1-3: "Omigosh, a human!"
Chapter 1-4: Sick Day
Chapter 1-5: Date Night
Chapter 1-6: A Celestial Visit
Chapter 1-7: A Lunar Prank
Chapter 1-9: A Ceremony of Stupidity
Chapter 1-10: A "Perfect" Birthday
Chapter 1-11: (Not So) Secret Santa!
Chapter 1-12: Familiar Faces
Chapter 2-1: A Shadow's Tale (Pt.1)
Chapter 2-2: A Shadow's Tale (Pt.2)
Chapter 2-3: A Shadow's Tale (Pt.3)
Chapter 2-4: Everything is fine...ish (Pt.1)
Chapter 2-5: Everything is fine...ish (Pt.2)
Chapter 2-6: "I'M BATMANNNN!"
Chapter 2-7: A Dare Turned To Love?
Chapter 2-8: And A Cult Turned To Sh*t
Chapter 2-9: "It's not what it looks like..."
Chapter 2-9.5: The Bonus Mini-Chapter
Chapter 2-10: One Year Later (Pt.1)
Chapter 2-11: One Year Later (Pt.2)
Chapter 2-12: One Couple's Anniversary, Another Couple's Feud...
Chapter 3-1: The Big Day
Chapter 3-2: The Wedding of a Rainbow
Chapter 3-3: Ice Cream Thieves
Chapter 3-4: Pizza Talk
Chapter 3-6: "Birth" of the Memege
Chapter 3-7: Shadow's "Vacation"
Chapter 3-8: Mares Only
Chapter 3-9: "Beast of the Everfree" (Pt. 1)
Chapter 3-10: "Beast of the Everfree" (Pt. 2)
Chapter 3-11: An Unexpected Arrival
Chapter 3-12: "Welcome to the world, little ones..."
Chapter 3.5-1: Jorge
Chapter 3.5-2: Ishtaba
Chapter 3.5-3: Dylan
Chapter 3.5-4: Shadow
Chapter 1-1: The Start of a New Day
Chapter 1-8: A Discorded Vacation
Chapter 3-5: A Meet with the Princesses

Chapter 1-2: "Official"

The sun shone through the window, a slight breeze could be felt around the room. Godson clenched his eyes shut more than it already was as the sun tried to blind him, even while his eyes were closed.

He slowly opened his eyes, only to instantly shut them as the sun attempted to attack him with blindness. He moved his head slightly, taking his eyes away from the sunlight. Once the sun was out of his eyes, he opened them.

The first thing he woke up to was a sleeping Rainbow Dash, her forelegs and rear legs wrapped around him, she rested her head on his pillow, allowing them to be closer together, practically breathing the same air. The mare in front of him cooed softly in her sleep, carrying a content smile as she snuggled closer to him.

He smiled warmly at the adorable sight, he noticed his own arms were wrapped around her. Taking advantage of this, he tightened his grip on her, pulling her even closer to him. As he slowly began to wake up completely, he began to notice a few notice a few things about the mare he held. Besides the fact they were in his bedroom, her mane was disheveled, her wings were all ruffled, evidence of the events that transpired last night.

Speaking of last night… Weren’t they on the couch?

Godson examined the area he was lying on, noticing they were indeed in his bed. He’d ask how he got here, but as it’s just the two of them in his house, it’s most likely he carried her here.

Dash stirred in her sleep, mumbling something he couldn't quite understand. He immediately froze in place as she moved, trying to keep her asleep for just a little while longer.

It worked for the most part, as her random mumbling slowly died down. He sighed a breath of relief, only for the mare to tighten her grip on him. “My human…” She muttered softly, scooting herself lower as she nuzzled into the crook of his neck. “Mine…”

His heart warmed at the cuddly mare’s actions. It was a bit of a surprise to see how much of a soft side she has, even though he somewhat expected it. He just didn’t expect her to be so…

Adorable.

His hand slowly found his way to her head, idly stroking her mane softly as he continued to lay in bed.

She shuffled as he petted her, her eyes slowly opening as she began to wake. She noticed her current position, and took it to her slight advantage.

Godson jolted in surprise as he felt something soft, warm, yet moist press against his neck. He wanted to look down, but he also didn’t want to accidentally bonk her in the head by moving his head. After a few seconds, he figured it was Dash, playfully licking his neck.

And he was right, Dash started licking at his neck, slowly travelling up more and more until she was face to face with him once more. She carried a playful smirk on her face as she stopped her licking right at his chin.

“Good morning~...” Dash cooed.

“Good morning…” Godson replied softly. “Enjoy your sleep?”

“You have no idea…” Dash said with a giggle. “You?”

“I slept good, yeah.” Godson nodded.

“Good…” Dash muttered, stifling a yawn. “Ugh, I’m tired…”

“I bet you are, after everything that happened last night.” Godson joked.

“Ohhh… But it was so worth it…” Dash smiled.

Godson chuckled softly at the mare’s response. Then, he remembered something. After mentioning last night, something was immediately brought to his attention.

“Well. I’m glad you enjoyed it.” Godson said abruptly, leaning in for a quick peck. “But I just remembered something.”

“Can it wait a couple of hours…?” Dash murmured. “I wanna snuggle some more, I need more sleep.”

“Sorry, Dashie...” Godson shook his head. “It just can’t wait, I just remembered I’m out of bleach, and I really need to go get some before the market closes.” He explained, slowly getting off of bed.

Dash whined as he left her alone in the bed. “Gonna use it on the couch?”

“No, shuddap.” Godson retorted, quickly walking out the room.

“Clean it real good, ya never know when we’re going to use it again!”

”Shut up!”

“You’re in your underwear!”

…

Godson walked back into the room, pointing a finger at Dash as he walked into the bathroom. “Shuddap.”

Dash simply bursted into laughter.

Godson groaned as he walked through the town he now calls his home. Nearly everypony in town had already gotten adjusted to the human living there. At first, most of the townsfolk were scared out of their minds over the large human, despite they would be the same size as him, if not taller, if they stood on their hindlegs.

Other ponies were simply curious over the new creature, and some even went as far as saying hello to him.

Little by little, more ponies had mustered enough courage to talk to the human, and eventually, everypony simply treated him as if he was one of them. Which he was perfectly fine with, having too attention focused on himself probably wouldn’t be the best of experiences.

Of course, there were a few ponies who either haven’t met him, or are still scared of him.

Surprisingly enough, Ponyville does have a small indoor grocery shop, despite his assumptions. Kinda like the pony equivalent of Publix, only a little smaller, and no meat.

He entered the small store, quickly noticing how the store seemed very reminiscent to Publix back home.

Unfortunately, he barely went to Publix for grocery shopping, which only made his task seem a lot harder than he hoped, as the two stores were seemingly alike.

He took in a deep breath, and sighed, thus beginning his journey to find bleach.

Aisle through aisle the human checked, ignoring the fact each of them had their own labels with a few examples of the items it carried. He’d gone through several aisles, coming across foods, drinks, household supplies, and yet, no bleach.

“Why is bleach so hard to find?” He thought aloud.

During his frantic searching, he came across a certain yellow pegasus in one of the aisles.

Yet, before he could say anything, she spoke up first.

“Oh! Hey there, Godson.” Fluttershy spoke with a smile. “Surprise bumping into you here.”

“I know, right?” Godson smiled back. “Hey, I appreciate you watching Linda for me, I’ll stop by in a little bit to pick her up.”

“Oh, that won’t be necessary.”

“Why’s that?”

Just like that, he heard the soft sounds of paws running in his direction. He quickly turned around to identify the source of the sound, only to see his dog running towards him, holding a bag of dog treats.

“Woah.” Godson stood there, speechless. “How’d you get her to stop barking at everypony?”

“It was really easy, actually.” Fluttershy answered, grabbing the bag of dog treats from the dog. “I just asked nicely. And told her that the ponies here are really nice, and wouldn’t want to hurt her.”

“Sounds like I could use the staples button at this point.” Godson thought. “Speaking of which… I wonder if I still have the app, anyway…”

“Oh, my… You have an expensive taste, don’t you, Linda?” Fluttershy looked at the small dog.

“Huh?” Godson interrupted. “Flutters, I can pay for it, it’s no big deal.”

“I promised her I’d get any kind of treats she wanted.” Fluttershy admitted. “I can’t break my promise to her, it would just be unfair.”

Godson blinked at the mare’s strange reply, then immediately shrugged. “Right, I forgot that you can communicate with animals.” He looked at the dog next to him, simply sitting down, with her tongue poking out of her mouth. He was surprised to see how easily Fluttershy was able to train her to stop barking at the townsfolk, after only having her for one day.

“So, what are you doing here, anyway?” Fluttershy asked abruptly. “I thought Rainbow Dash was spending the night?”

“Oh, she did. In fact, she’s still in bed, sleeping.” Godson replied with a chuckle. “I would’ve stayed in bed with her, but I need to buy some supplies, though I’m having a little trouble finding the things I need.”

“What are you looking for?” Fluttershy tilted her head. “Maybe I can help, I know this shop like the back of my hoof.”

“Mostly just some bleach, and more dog food while I’m already here.” Godson explained, catching Linda’s attention at the very mention of dog food.”

“Hm.” Fluttershy placed a hoof on her chin. “Bleach is over on…” She took a few steps out of the current aisle she was, quickly catching the number of the other aisle she was thinking about. “Aisle 9.” She returned to her initial spot. “I hope you don’t mind me asking… But are you cleaning something white or color?”

“Uh… Color. Brown, actually.”

“Yeah, they have this new ‘color safe’ bleach, I haven’t really tried it, but it’s worth a shot, anyway.” Fluttershy added. “I don’t remember Rarity making any brown clothes…”

“Yeah, it’s uh… it’s for the couch…” Godson reached for the back of his head, smiling sheepishly.

“Oh!” Fluttershy gasped. “D-Does that mean you two are officially a couple, now?”

“Huh?” Godson raised an eyebrow. “What do you mean by that?”

“Um, i-it’s nothing.” Fluttershy immediately blushed. “It’s probably none of my business, anyway…”

“No, hold on a sec.” Godson shook his head. “What do you mean ‘officially a couple’?”

“You mean… you don’t know?” Fluttershy went wide-eyed. “I thought you would’ve known…”

“Don’t know what?” Godson copied her expression. “Flutters, what is it I don’t know, exactly?”

“Have you… um… y’know…” Fluttershy’s blush grew brighter, covering more parts of her face the more she thought about it.

“Have sex?”

Fluttershy nodded softly.

“Why’s that important?”

“Well, when two ponies… um… make love… for the first time in their relationship… that’s when they make it o-official…”

“So, like… marriage?”

Fluttershy shook her head. “I think Twilight would be better at explaining it more…”

Godson tried to wrap his head around the mare’s vague explanation, not wanting to upset her, he nodded in agreement. “Yeah, I’ll go ask Twilight in a little bit. Sorry for all the trouble.”

“Oh, it was no trouble at all… it was just a little uncomfortable trying to explain it…” Fluttershy’s voice suddenly got quieter at the end of that sentence, but then immediately returned to normal. “But, yeah, it’d be better asking Twilight.”

“Yeah, being the bookworm she is, she’ll know how to explain it.” Godson thought aloud. “Thanks again for all your help, Flutters.”

“Glad I was able to help.” Fluttershy smiled. “Oh, and… here’s the bits for the treats.” She leaned over to Linda. “I hope you enjoy the treats, Linda.”

And with that, she walked off, continuing the rest of her shopping.

“Welp. Time to go have a talk with Twilight…”

“You mean you don’t know?” Twilight tilted her head.

“Yeah, I know. That’s why I came here to ask you.” Godson facepalmed. “Of course I don’t know, why do you think I’m here asking you?’

“Right.” Twilight smiled sheepishly. “Of course you wouldn’t know, you’ve only been here for… four months now, right?”

Godson nodded. “That sounds about right.”

“Wow, these months have gone flying by, haven’t they?”

“Just a little bit…”

“Anyway…” Twilight got back to the main reason he was here. “Yeah, when two ponies… er… mate… for the first time in their relationship. It means that, right then, right there, they’re… how would I say this… ‘claiming’ each other. Thus, making their relationship ‘official’.”

“So… like, marriage?”

“Not at all.” Twilight shook her head. “Hm, perhaps I worded that wrong…” She placed a thinking hoof on her chin. “Uh… okay, forget the whole ‘claiming’ thing. Think of it more like… uh… Expressing their love to each other, but uh… different.”

“So, basically, having sex is just another way of saying ‘I Love You’.” Godson mused.

“You could say that, only, it means more than that.” Twilight paused as she tried to find the perfect words to explain it, she then had an idea based on his statement. “It’s like saying ‘I Love You’, yes, but it also means ‘I’d never leave you’, ‘I’m all yours’, y’know, that kind of stuff.” She continued. “But, minus the whole marriage thing. I’m going on a limb here and assuming it’s the same as it is in your world.”

“Should be. Wedding, marriage, rings, cake, all that stuff.”

“Yeah. It’s the same.” Twilight concluded. “Only difference between marriage and making one’s relationship with another ‘official’, is that marriage brings the couple to an even greater bond. As now they’re making a promise. A promise tha—”

“The usual marriage stuff, yeah.” Godson interjected. “But wait… what happens if you try having sex with someone else while you’re already ‘official’?”

Twilight instantly narrowed her eyes at the question. “You don’t want to know.”

Her quick reaction caused Godson widened his eyes in fear, knowing he’d rather not know. He nodded in response. “Good thing I have the only mare I’d want to be with…”

And with that, Twilight shifted her attitude, from serious to joyous. The shift in attitude also caused Godson more worry, but he figured as long as he doesn’t screw anything up, he’d be fine.

“Well, glad I was able to fill you in that.” Twilight smiled. “Otherwise who knows how much trouble you would’ve gotten into if you wouldn’t have asked.”

“Not much…” Godson crossed his arms. “It’s not like I was planning on screwing up my relationship with Dash.”

“Hm. I suppose you’re right.” Twilight commented. “Well, if you need any more help, don’t hesitate to ask, alright?”

“Of course!”

Godson slowly opened the door to his room, attempting his best to keep the mare asleep for as long as he can. He watched as his dog ran to the bed, jumping on top as soon as she got close enough. She maneuvered her way under the blankets, somehow not disturbing the sleeping mare.

He walked in the room, softly closing the door behind him. He stepped through the room as quietly as possible, getting closer and closer to the bed. Once he got close enough, he sat down on his side, taking off his shoes, then proceeded to lay down next to her.

The mare in front of him hummed softly, stirring around as she slowly opened her eyes.

“Oh, sure. When Linda gets in bed, you don’t feel it, but when I get in bed, you suddenly wake up…” Godson thought. “Hey there, Dashie…”

“Hey…” Dash smiled softly. “Cleaned the couch?”

“Yeah, I did.” Godson nodded. “Fluttershy told me about a ‘color-safe’ bleach, and I tried it out. Works pretty well.”

“That’s good…” Dash muttered. “So then… what’re you doin’ back here?”

“Gonna take a nap with my favorite mare, what else am I gonna do?” Godson replied with a soft laugh, covering himself with the blankets. “So… we’re officially a couple, now?”

“Mhm.” Dash hummed. “Wasn’t that the whole point of me asking you last night?”

“So was what happened afterwards.” Godson teased.

“Oooh… That’s right…” Dash smirked as she was reminded of last night’s events. “Is there something wrong with us being a couple?”

“Not at all.” Godson shook his head. “As long as it’s with you, I don’t care.”

“You’re not gonna even complain I asked too fast?” Dash raised an eyebrow.

Godson wrapped his arms around her. “You’re not the fastest mare in Equestria for nothing.” He pulled her closer to him. “I might’ve preferred you waiting a little bit longer before you asked… but, eh, I get it, you’re an impatient mare.”

“Thanks…” Dash murmured.

“Though, to be fair, I’m a bit impatient too.” Godson chuckled.

Dash laughed softly at the human’s comment. Wanting to get even closer to the human, she moved her rear legs around in an attempt to wrap his legs, but instead found something warm and furry.

“Uh… Godson?”

“Yeah?”

“Is Linda here?”

“In bed?”

“Yeah.”

“Yeah, she sleeps in the bed, too.”

“Has she always slept in the bed?”

“Ever since I’ve had her.”

Dash lifted the blankets, looking down at the dog, sleeping at the foot of the bed.

“Hm.” She uttered. “I guess I can live with that. Tank does the same thing in my house.”

“Your turtle?” Godson asked.

“Mhm.” Dash nodded with a hum. “Don’t worry about him, though. I left enough food that’ll last a couple of days. I’ll check on him in a few hours…” She wrapped her forelegs around the human. “But for now… I’mma cuddle with my human.”

“I wouldn’t have it any other way…”

Author's Note

Despite what you might think, this whole "official" thing is actually going to leave an effect on the story. You won't see it having much effect here for a while, but I promise, I planned this thing out for a reason.

Even though it kinda sounds like total bullsh*t that a five year old made up. But we're not here for a good story, we're here for something a few friends and I made purely for the sh*ts and giggles!

Besides, I've seen stories have their own logic for Equestria, so I figured why the heck not?

But at least you got some fluff.

Chapter 1-3: "Omigosh, a human!"

“That was easy.”

“Ha! I still have the app!”

Godson sat in a bench outside Sugarcube Corner, just finding out that he’ll be having a few days off of work, adding to the day he already had off yesterday. It was both good and bad. Bad because he wouldn’t get paid for those days off, but good because he really didn’t feel like working today.

At least he saved some bits to last him until then…

He stood from the bench, returning his phone to it’s temporary home. He attempted to figure out what he could do while Dash was at work.

“Ugh. I’m off from work, and Dash isn’t.” He whined. “The heck am I supposed to do until she gets out?”

Suddenly, Twilight walked by, catching notice of the human. “Hey, Godson. I was actually looking for you!” She cheered. “I kinda need some help wi—”

“Shut up, Twilight!” Godson brought his hands to his head. “I’m trying to think of something to do while Dash is at work!”

Twilight stared blankly at the human. “Here’s an idea…” She began. “Why not help me out with some stuff until she’s done?”

“Hm. No, that’s a dumb idea.” Godson shook his head. Not too long later, an idea popped into his head. “I got it!” He shouted. “How about I help you out until she’s done?”

“Gee… I wonder how you came up with that idea…”

“Uh... What exactly did you need me to do?”

“Well, I needed someone to help me test a spell I found.”

“So I’m basically going to be your test dummy, aren’t I?”

“Yeah. Pretty much.”

“Great…” Godson sighed. “What kind of spell did you find, exactly?”

“According to what I’ve read, it’s supposedly a spell to freeze someone right in their tracks.” Twilight explained.

“Frozen in ice?”

“No.” Twilight shook her head. “More like, the subject’s whole body is just… stuck.”

“So... kinda like... paralysed?”

“Somewhat.” Twilight nodded. “If you were running, you’d be stuck in that pose, if you were in the air, you’d be stuck in the air until you were unfrozen.”

“Frozen in time, then?”

“Yeah, almost. You can still breathe, move your eyes, that kind of stuff, apparently, but that’s pretty much it.” Twilight concluded. “But I needed to test it something living, and I’m not gonna put Spike in harm’s way…”

“...So you’d be perfectly fine throwing me in harm’s way.” Godson finished the sentence.

“Exactly!” Twilight beamed, then ultimately caught herself, going wide-eyed as she realized what she said. “N-No! That’s not what I…!”

“Relax. I’m messing with you.” Godson teased. “Geez, learn to take a joke.”

Twilight narrowed her eyes, pissed over the human’s stupidity. She took a deep breath, and began preparing herself as she started to cast the spell. Her horn illuminated in a bright purple glow.

The test dummy in question suddenly felt a tingling in his entire body as it was being engulfed in Twilight’s magic aura, starting from his feet, climbing up until it reached the top of his head. Once her magic completely surrounded him, it faded away, and he found himself no longer able to move.

“There.” Twilight smiled at her new accomplishment. “That’ll teach you to keep joking around.”

Godson tried to move his head to look at himself, but no avail. He attempted to move his eyeballs, which seemed to work, as well as his obvious breathing. He attempted to move his mouth.

“Test.” He said aloud. “Great… Being frozen while being able to talk… I think you screwed up your spell, Twilight.”

“No I didn’t.” Twilight shook her head. “That was something that I intentionally did. Just to add to the annoyance.”

“Hm.” Godson hummed. “Well, it does feel out-of-place… Now, put me back to normal.”

“What?”

“Put me back to normal.”

“What’s the magic word?”

“...Please?”

“Nope!” Twilight’s face suddenly morphed into an evil smile. “I said the magic word”

“The heck is that supposed to even mean!?”

"Too late!" Twilight’s horn quickly began to glow once more, surrounding the frozen human in the glow as well. “All the times you played jokes on me... now it’s my turn!”

“I don’t like the sound of that…”

The door magically opened on it’s own, and soon, Godson found himself floating his way towards the door.

“Twilight...? What are you doing...?”

The fact he was unable to move frightened him even more, as he wasn’t able to even turn his head to see what was going on behind him. He was frozen, perfectly standing, unable to move a single muscle in his body.

As he levitated out of the door, Twilight followed suit. And eventually, she turned him around, and placed him down.

“Wait, why am I being placed down out here?”

Twilight simply ignored him, and continued with her work. As he was placed down on the ground, her aura faded away once again. She had placed him in an area right between her yard, and the ‘road’ in which everypony casually walked in.

“Annnnnd…. There.” Twilight nodded. “Have fun, Godson!” With that, she walked back into the library.

“What?” Godson worriedly spoke. Though before he could try to say anything else, the door far behind him closed with a soft “click”.

“Of course…” He sighed. “Well… guess I deserved this…”

He moved his eyes in attempt to look around, watching as everypony simply walked around and minding their own business. While there was a number of people who noticed the frozen human, no one ever stopped to question whether it was just a realistic looking statue, or actually him standing still for no reason.

“Well… At least it can’t get any worse than this…” He thought aloud.

“Omigosh, a human!”

“...I spoke too soon, didn’t I?”

Lyra walked up to the frozen human. “Omigoshomigoshomigosh!” She yelled in pure excitement. “This is a perfect statue of a human! It looks so life-like and everything!”

“Lyra…” Bonbon whined. “Enough of this huma—”

“Tell me you see this.” Lyra interrupted. “Tell me I’m not the only one who sees this!”

Bonbon looked at him, then back at her. “Alright… yeah, I see it.”

“This is a human!”

“How would you know?”

“There’s a book all about humans, and how they live in another world, different from ours!” Lyra explained. “I forgot who wrote it, but it was accurately detailed!”

“‘Accurate’. Right…” Bonbon rolled her eyes.

“I wonder what’s it doing sitting out here in front of the Golden Oaks Library…” Lyra placed a hoof on her chin.

“Does it matter, Lyra?” Bonbon inquired. “Just leave it alone…” She sighed, continuing her walk to her destination.

Meanwhile, Godson stayed completely silent, allowing the duo to think he was merely just a statue.

“I think it’s out here for anypony to take…”

“No it’s not…”

“I should take it…”

“No you shouldn’t…”

“I’m gonna take it…”

“Don’t take it, Lyra…”

“TOO LATE!” Lyra excitedly shouted, already levitating the ‘statue’ with her magic.

Bonbon looked back, seeing the mare already walking up to her with the ‘statue’ floating nearby. She sighed, shrugging off the idea of wanting to argue with her over the ‘statue’, knowing she wasn’t going to get anywhere by doing so, anyway.

“This would look great in the back yard!”

Twilight hummed softly as she got her rest from Godson. At the same time, this allowed him to stay out of trouble until Rainbow Dash returned from work. It wasn’t that she felt that he was completely dumb and irresponsible, it was just, at times, he actually was.

Her door softly opened, with Dash slowly peeking her head in. “Hey… Twilight?” She spoke softly.

Twilight turned her head to the door. “Yeah?”

“Have you seen Godson?” Dash asked worriedly. “I can’t find him anywhere… He’s not home, he’s not at work, and he doesn’t come by here too often…”

“He’s not in the front yard?” Twilight raised an eyebrow.

“No?” Dash raised an eyebrow as well. “Why would he?”

Twilight winced at the yelling she would soon receive. “I kinda… froze him with a spell… And then left him outside…”

“So why isn’t he there…?”

“Uh…”

“YOU LOST HIM!?” Dash shouted, her wings sprung open in rage over Twilight’s actions.

“No!” Twilight retorted. “I just… misplaced him…!”

Dash narrowed her eyes. “You ‘misplaced’ him…”

“Yeah…” Twilight sheepishly smiled.

Dash rolled her eyes. “Cool. So, Godson is out who knows where. And can’t even escape thanks to a spell you tested on him.” She sighed.

“He volunteered to help me test!”

“Did he volunteer to being used as a garden gnome?”

“Er…”

“Exactly.”

Twilight scoffed. “You make it sound like such a big deal.”

“It is a big deal!” Dash countered.

“This is Godson we’re talking about.” Twilight pointed out. “I’m sure he can’t be in that much trou—Now I see why you’re worrying…”

“Glad to see you understand.” Dash nodded. “'Cause you're gonna help find him!”

“I still can’t believe Twilight would want to throw out a statue like this…”

“She didn’t… You stole it…”

“Steal is such a harsh word!” Lyra retorted. “I prefer I… rescued it.”

“Rescued it from what, Lyra?” Bonbon raised an eyebrow.

“...The trash?” Lyra replied with a sheepish grin. “Oh, come on, Bonbon! I really doubt Twilight would just leave a statue of a human outside the library for no reason at all!”

“I’m sure she has her reasons…” Bonbon rolled her eyes. “Maybe she was redecorating, and needed to move it out of the way.”

“Or she was getting ready to throw it out to the trash…” Lyra added.

“Alright. Fine.” Bonbon shook her head. “I give up. But if somepony starts looking for their statue back, I’m going to tell them you stole it.”

“Nopony’s gonna want this statue!” Lyra countered. “If you don’t believe humans exist, why would anypony else?”

Bonbon sighed. She knew she wasn’t going to win this argument. While Lyra was right about herself being the only one who believes humans exists, Bonbon still believed Twilight had that statue for a reason.

She looked up, and noticed a rainbow trail in the sky. It quickly faded, though she already knew who created that trail. She looked back in the library’s direction, despite already being far away, and saw the trail ended there.

“C’mon!” Lyra nudged her. “We’re almost home!”

Fortunately, Bonbon wasn’t the only one who noticed the rainbow trail.

“I hope Dash finds me… soon.” Godson thought. “I’m not sure how long I can stand being somepony’s ‘statue’...”

He started thinking about how bad Twilight might be feeling whenever she realized he’s gone missing, with absolutely no way back. Or how his waifu/marefriend is feeling over his disappearance.

Not long later, he snapped out of his train of thought. And he instantly found himself in a new area. Without even realizing it, he was already brought home to Lyra’s house. He scanned his surroundings, finding a door not too far away, indicating him being in a separate room, a picture frame sitting on a nearby table, and other normal household objects.

What he couldn’t see, however, was the room he was actually placed in. All he could see was a part of the room, and the door in front of him. Unfortunately for him, the room he was placed in was not an ordinary room.

Behind him was a shrine to humans. Drawings, paintings, copies of the book she previously mentioned. Anything you could find related to humans was right here in this shrine.

And Godson was put right in front of it all.

Rainbow Dash searched frantically for her human, asking everypony if they saw him, or even a statue of him. Everyone she’d ask would turn up with a negative result. She hoped she’d find him soon, otherwise she’d worry herself to death. While she wasn’t too worried that he could get hurt while being frozen, she was more worried over the fact she would never see him again.

Upon finding somepony she hadn’t already asked, she walked up to them. “Excuse me… Have you seen Godson?”

“Godson?”

“Yeah… Like, super tall, walks around on two feet, wears clothes all the time?”

“You mean that creature who has that barking dog?”

“Yeah! That’s him!” Dash confirmed. “Have you seen him?”

“Nope.”

She sighed. “Alright, thanks anyway.” She slowly turned around, preparing to leave. Then quickly turned her head to double-check something. “What about a statue of him, have you seen that anywhere around?”

“Not that I know of… no. Sorry.”

“Alright.” Dash nodded. “Thanks again.”

She flew off into the sky, scanning the small town in an attempt to find her ‘boyfriend’.

Godson insisted instead of referring to him as her ‘stallionfriend’, to refer to him as her ‘boyfriend’ instead, since he wasn’t a stallion. She laughed at the memory, which only made her worry even more. She wasn’t sure what she’d do without her childish human.

Dash got closer to the ground. Her previous birds-eye view hadn’t helped, so she figured getting a closer look around would yield more results.

“I still can’t believe Lyra had to take that darn statue…”

Dash’s ear twitched at the mention of a statue. She turned her head, seeing a slightly irritated Bonbon walking off to Sugarcube Corner. Dash raised an eyebrow, wondering if the ‘statue’ she was referring to is actually her frozen boyfriend.

She landed on the ground, and ran off to the muttering mare.

“Hey… Uh.”

Bonbon looked towards the sound of her voice, seeing Rainbow Dash walking next to her.

“Yes, Rainbow Dash?” She raised an eyebrow.

“I heard something about a statue. Uh, I wanted to ask you something about it.”

Bonbon stopped walking, catching Dash off guard. “Oh?”

Dash turned around to face the mare. “Was the ‘statue’ in front of the Golden Oak Library?”

Bonbon nodded.

“I heard Lyra took it?”

Bonbon nodded again.

“‘Kay, well, I want it back.” Dash bluntly stated. “It’s my statue, don’t ask why it was in front of the library, I didn’t put it there.”

“Oh!” Bonbon’s eyes widened. “I knew there was a reason why that statue was there!”

“So. Uh. Yeah. Can I have it back?” Dash sheepishly smiled.

“Of course!” Bonbon nodded enthusiastically, “I’ll even take you to it myself! And… For the record, I told her not to take it.”

Dash blinked. “Wow… That was easy…”

Godson reflected on the past hour he stood in front of the shrine. Lyra had came once or twice to mutter random crap about humans. And sometimes she’d just smile at the ‘statue’ whenever she passed by.

The longer he stayed here, the more he wanted to see Rainbow Dash again.

“The statue’s down the hall, to the right.”

“Bonbon! What are you doing!?”

“That statue you took belongs to Rainbow Dash!”

“Then what was it doing in front of Golden Oak?”

Dash walked in the room. “Finally…” She sighed of relief. “I found you…”

Lyra quickly ran in the room. “Why do you even have this statue anyway?”

Dash raised an eyebrow. “Why do you want it?” She looked back at Godson, and noticed all the paintings and human-related objects all placed together in a shrine. Immediately, she went wide-eyed. “Uh. Okayyyyyy…”

“It’s just a statue, Rainbow Dash! Why not let me keep it? It’d be better off with me, anyway!”

“Uhh.. No… It needs to go back home.” Dash paused for a moment. “With me.”

“It’s just a dumb statue!” Lyra whined. “You’re just gonna stuff it in some closet and not care about it!”

“How would you know?” Dash asked. “What if I have my own human shrine?”

“Do you?”

“...No. But that’s not the point!”

“Then what are you gonna do with it!?”

“If you wanna see, then help me take it back to Twilight’s.”

Lyra looked at the statue, which seemed to be looking directly at Dash, instead of straight ahead. She shook her head, and saw it looking straight ahead again. She looked back at Dash, who kept an irritated look.

“Fine.” Lyra groaned. “But I wanna see what you’re gonna do with it.”

“Fine by me.” Dash chuckled at a new thought. “This is gonna be… interesting.”

Twilight opened her door. “Dash… I can’t find hi—”

“I did.” Dash smiled. Pointing at the statue behind her. “And, uh, if you don’t mind, I brought Lyra to see something.”

Twilight turned her head to the unicorn, then back at Dash. “That’s fine.”

She walked up to the frozen human, her horn illuminating in a purple glow as she got closer and closer.

“What’s she doing…?” Lyra whispered.

Soon enough, the human started glowing in the same purple glow. Little by little, he was starting to be able to move. It started as tiny movements from his fingers, until he was fully able to move again.

Once Twilight’s aura vanished off of his body, he went completely limp, falling over on the floor.

Dash ran up to him. Leaving Lyra gawking and wide-eyed.

Godson was quickly lifted up to his knees by a pair of cyan hooves. The ones that belonged to the mare he thought he wouldn’t see again. Groaning, he lifted his head in an attempt to see her face.

“You alright?” She asked.

“Yeah…” He attempted to nod, though instead of doing so, he winced as he tried. “Just… not moving for an hour or so kinda has me cramping… everywhere.”

“At least you’re back.” Dash sighed of relief.

“Were you worried about me?”

“No!” Dash retorted. “...Yes.”

“Heh…” Godson chuckled. “I was too…”

Dash pulled the human closer, allowing her to wrap her hooves around him. She stood up on her rear legs with wings flared open as she tried to help her boyfriend stand.

“Dash?”

“Hm?”

“Trying to help me stand isn’t... well… helping.”

“Need me to carry you home?” Dash queried.

“Please?” Godson asked softly.

“Ugh.” Dash groaned. “Sure… But you’ll have to owe me something when you can stand again.”

Godson smiled warmly. “Of course. Love you, Dashie.”

Dash smiled back. “Love you too.” She reached her head forward, locking lips with the human.

Meanwhile, Lyra remained watching, completely confused over the events that transpired in front of her.

“What… What just happened…?”

Dash broke apart from the kiss, turning her head to the confused unicorn.

“You wanted to know what I was gonna do with the statue? This was it.” Dash smirked. “Lyra. Meet Godson. He’s not a statue. He never was…”

“So…” Lyra walked up to the human, whom was still wrapped in his marefriend’s hooves. “All this time… it wasn’t a statue…”

“Blame Twilight…” Godson rolled his eyes. “She wanted to test a spell, I let her, and the next thing I know, I’m kidnapped by a human-crazed mare.”

“B-But… You’re actually real!”

“So?”

“That’s… amazing! Are there more of you?”

“I’m the only one.” Godson replied.

“And he’s mine.” Dash added.

“And you two are… dating?”

Dash nodded, speaking for both her and the human. “Yep! We’re officially dating!”

“O-Oh!” Lyra went wide-eyed. “I-I’m sorry for uh… stealing you… like that…”

“Let’s just pretend it didn’t happen.” Godson attempted to shake his head, but fail ultimately. “It’s all Twilight’s fault anyway.”

“Speaking of Twilight…” Dash spoke, turning around just a little bit to be able to turn her head to the mare behind her. “No more testing spells on my boyfriend!” She pointed a hoof at her. “You can test spells on me, on Spike, doesn’t matter. But no more testing them on Godson.”

“Wha… Fine…” Twilight groaned. “I won’t test spells on him anymore…”

“Good.” Dash nodded, looking back to her human.

“Alright, can, uh… can we go home?” Godson asked. “I’m thirsty…”

“Oooh… Thirsty, huh? I know the per—”

“Get your mind out of the gutter, Dashie. I need water.”

“Hmph. You’re no fun.”

Chapter 1-4: Sick Day

Godson laid in bed, arms and legs sprawled out, he woke up today having a horrible fever. Which somewhat worried him. Being in another world was one thing, but being sick in another world is another. What if he had a cold? Ponies have common colds in this world, but what if he had something worse than a cold?

Fortunately, Dash was with him when he woke up. It was a calm moment at first, then quickly took a different turn. He softly spoke up saying he didn’t feel too good, and her, being the worried marefriend she usually is, she placed a hoof on his forehead, and felt his head to be extremely hot. She grabbed a thermometer and used it to check for a fever, the result came at 99.6.

While it was just a slight fever, it still worried her some. Since he’s never had any illnesses while living in Equestria. For the past hour or so, she’s been on the living room watching TV, but still coming by every so often to check on him. She even went as far as quickly visiting her job and telling them that she might not make it for the next few days. Luckily, she had more than enough vacation days to cover it.

If he wasn’t too lazy to time how long before her random checks, he’d guess she came about every five minutes.

Yeah, that seemed about right.

Every five minutes his marefriend came to check on him. It didn’t bother him, he was actually glad to see how much she cared about him. Despite only being together for about two and a half weeks.

Suddenly, the sick human felt a soft pain in his stomach, which turned into an unpleasant feeling, and began traveling upwards.

A soft “burp” came out. Catching him off guard.

“Should I call her…?”

“I don’t wanna bother her…”

“But if I throw up…”

“Dashieeee~!” He softly called out.

In an instant, Dash opened the door. “What’s wrong?”

There were times where Godson had forgotten his marefriend was as fast as Sonic the friggin Hedgehog. This was one of them.

“I think… *burp* I’m gonna throw up…” He groaned.

“I’ll go get a bucket!” Dash nodded, zipping off to find a bucket. Two seconds later, she returns with the bucket in her grasp, and giving it to the poor human as she sat him up.

Godson stared into the bucket, taking deep breaths and blowing, doing whatever he could to prevent him from vomiting.

At the same time, Dash sat next to him, rubbing his back in an attempt to relax him, as well as help him prevent throwing up.

Fortunately, it worked. He wasn’t sure exactly what helped him in the first place, but, the unpleasant feeling in his stomach went back down, and faded into nothingness.

“Whew…” He sighed. “False alarm…”

Suddenly, felt his marefriend wrap her hooves around his waist. He looked to his side, watching as the mare hugged him. Smiling, he wrapped his own arm around her, allowing her to rest her head on his chest.

“Why do you worry about me so much…?” He asked.

“Cause you’re so… fragile…”

“Fragile?”

“Yeah… You get hurt easily, you bruise easily... “ Dash nuzzled his chest. “If you fall off a couple of feet, you’d break a bone…” She sighed. “It takes a lot to hurt me. Or, ponies in general…” She looked up at him. “And I worry because… you’re so sweet and all… if something happened…”

“You make it sound like... *cough* I could die too easily…”

“You could!” Dash countered. “Ponies here are tougher than you are. Derpy got shocked once when she was bouncing on a cloud, and she’s perfectly fine! If it were you who got shocked like that…”

Godson saw the fear in her eyes, making him realize how weak and helpless he actually was compared to all the residents of Ponyville.

“So then… why are you dating someone so fragile?”

“Cause. If I don’t, who will?” Dash joked. “Nah… You’re just so… cute.”

“Cute?” Godson raised an eyebrow. “I’m not cute!”

“Yes you are.” Dash giggled. “You’re sweet, kind… kinda like Fluttershy.”

“Fluttershy?”

“Minus the shy part.” Dash added. “You just sometimes have your ‘moments’, and you need someone to set you straight. That’s what you have me for.”

“Don’t act like you don’t have your ‘moments’.” Godson huffed.

“And that’s why we have each other.” Dash finally concluded. “We need to set each other straight most of time, you’re always trying to keep me happy.”

“Mhm…”

“So it’s only fair if I return the favor by worrying so much.” She sighed softly, resting her head down on his chest once more.

Godson continued to sit in bed, his marefriend still holding him in her embrace. He let her words sink in, thinking them over as they shared this small moment together. He looked down at the cuddly mare, who seemed like she was never going to let go. Something he was totally fine with.

“Dashie?”

The mare looked up at him with her head askew.

“Have I ever told you how much I love you?”

“About a hundred times.” Dash chortled.

“Would you mind if I told you a hundred more times?” Godson asked curiously.

“Not at all…”

Dash returned to the bedroom once more, carrying a tray in hoof. She found the sick human sleeping in bed, it would’ve been a nice sight for her, had he not been sick to ruin the moment.

Despite not wanting to disturb him from his sleep, he needed to eat. He hadn’t eaten anything since he got up. She set the tray down on top of the drawer, moving the alarm clock and a few other small objects out of the way to make room.

She climbed up in bed and sat next to him. She softly placed her hoof on his forehead, checking for any fever. Fortunately, whatever fever he previously had was now gone, as he seemed to be at a normal temperature. She sighed a breath of relief, happy she wouldn’t have to take him to the hospital or anything.

She slowly lowered her head, softly pressing her lips against his forehead. After giving a soft kiss to her sleeping boyfriend, she grabbed him and shook him gently. “Godson…”

The human in front of her groaned quietly, and stirred around as she tried to wake him up. Soon enough, he opened his eyes, with her being the first thing he saw.

“Hey there, sleepyhead…” Dash spoke softly. “I brought you some soup…”

Godson hummed as he slowly sat up. “Thanks…”

Dash kissed his cheek. “No problem…” Getting out of bed, she grabbed the tray, and placed it on his lap. She watched at the human groggily ate the meal she brought.

Suddenly, there was a knock on the front door.

Dash’s ear twitched at the sound, she turned her head to where she heard the sound coming from, then looked back at her human. She walked out of the room, letting him eat while she checked who was at the door.

Upon opening it, she found Twilight standing right behind it.

“Oh, hey Rainbow.” Twilight spoke. “I came to check on Godson real quick.”

“He’s eating some soup at the moment…” Dash replied. “Why? Something wrong?”

“Remember the spell I used on him yesterday?”

“Uh… Yeah?”

“Well. As it turns out… There seems to be a side effect to long term exposure to the spell.”

“Side effect?” Dash tilted her head. “What kind of side effect…?”

“From what I could tell, from being exposed to that spell for that long may leave him with an upset stomach, possible fever, and normal common cold symptoms…”

“You’re a bit too late on that…” Dash rolled her eyes. “How long does it last?”

“Oh… I’d say about…” Twilight placed a hoof on her chin. “A couple days… four days, at the most.”

“And then you wonder why I don’t want you testing spells on him…” Dash sighed.

“It’s not like he would’ve died…”

“If he went too long without food or water, he would’ve.”

“Do you really think we’d take that long in finding him?”

“Anything could’ve happened, Twilight!” Dash attempted not to shout. “One wrong spell and his weak little body could be damaged. It’s not like zapping Pinkie Pie with a random spell and then undo it.” Dash shook her head. “For Godson, one mistake, and it could mean his life…”

“Then if he’s so fragile, why are you always slapping him around?”

“I slap him softly. Hard enough for him to feel a little pain, but not enough to knock him out.” Dash explained. “He may be fragile, but he’s not as breakable as a vase. He can take a little pain.”

“Fair enough.” Twilight nodded.

“Besides, if I don’t take care of him…” She looked at the bedroom door. “What kind of marefriend would I be to just let him screw himself up?”

“At least you’re caring for him.” Twilight smiled. “I’m sure he’s more than happy to have you for a marefriend.”

Dash looked at Twilight, seeing her bright smile, causing her to smile back. “Yeah… He is…”

“Well. You seem to have this under control. I’ll leave it to you to take care of him until he feels better.” Twilight said with a nod. “I’ll see you later, Rainbow Dash.”

“See ya…” Dash nodded back, watching as Twilight walked off. She slowly closed the door, and then thought about something, which had her open the door again.

“Hey, Twilight!” She shouted.

Twilight turned her head, indicating she was listening.

“Is whatever he has contagious?” Dash asked loudly.

“Not at all!” Twilight shook her head. “Feel free to cuddle, smooch, or whatever it is you two do alone!”

“...’Kay!”

Then she closed the door.

Walking back to the bedroom, she smiled, knowing Godson’s current illness was somewhat minor, and would go away on its own. He just needed someone to take care of him. As she entered the room, she grabbed the door.

“Lindaaa~!” She shouted. “Get over here!”

Sure enough, the familiar chihuahua ran as fast as her tiny paws could take her, until she made it to the room. Dash closed the door, and watched as the small dog hopped onto bed, and quickly ran under the blankets.

She looked up to the human, who was already laying back down.

“Finished your soup?” She asked.

“Yeah…” Godson answered softly. “I laid the tray on the floor. I’ll pick it up in a little bit…”

“Don’t worry about it…” Dash shook her head with a soft laugh. “You just get your rest. I’ll pick it up in a little bit.”

“Alright…” Godson sighed. “Who was at the door?”

“Twilight. She wanted to check on you.” Dash explained. “According to her, you’re dealing with a side-effect from the freezing spell she tested on you.”

“Is it bad?”

“Not really. It’ll last a few days, though. It’s not even contagious.” Dash climbed up in bed, covering herself in the blankets. “Nothing like a little bedrest and some TLC to help you get better until then…”

“Some TLC, huh?” Godson raised an eyebrow. “I like the the sound of that…”

“You should…” Dash snuggled close to him, wrapping her hooves around his chest. “I took the next couple of days off so I could take care of you.”

“When did you do that?”

“Before I started watching TV, I paid a quick visit to my job.”

“So that means I have you all to myself for the next few days?”

“Looks like it.” Dash leaned in for a quick peck. “And to be honest…” Her mouth gawked open as she yawned softly. “...I could use a little nap…”

“We both could…” Godson smiled mildly, wrapping his arms around the mare. He sighed contently as he cuddled with his marefriend. “A few extra hours of sleep wouldn’t hurt anyone, right?”

“Right…” Dash muttered, slowly drifting to sleep.

“I love you, Dashie.” He softly spoke, wrapping his legs around her rear legs, pulling her even closer in his embrace.

“I love you too, Godson…”

He leaned in for a small kiss, and then, they both drifted to sleep…

Author's Note

Shorter chapter than usual. But hey! A cute little romance chapter! Makes up for Dash's speediness in her relationship, right? ...Right?

In my defense, I believe Dash would be speedy with her relationships, as she is with almost everything in her life.

Chapter 1-5: Date Night

“A date?” Dash raised an eyebrow at the human’s request. “What’s this all about?”

“Aw, c’mon, Dash…” Godson frowned softly. “We’ve been official for two weeks now, and ever since I got better a week or so ago, we haven’t done anything together!”

“Yeah, I know. It’s just that I’ve been busy with work, and everything…” Dash replied.

“So then at least let me take you on a date.” Godson countered. “What better way to relax than with someone you love?”

“I don’t know…” Dash shook her head. “I want to get up early enough so I can get everything done faster…”

“Our date won’t even be that long!”

“Godson, it’s like 8 o’clock at night. What exactly are we gonna do at this time?” Dash queried.

“There’s a lot of things we could do!” Godson crossed his arms. “We could go eat out… Or go for a late night stroll around Ponyville… Or if none of those are good options for you, you could spend the night at my house! Just… anything that can get us to spend a little time together!”

“Godson, as much as I’d love to spend the night, who’s gonna take care of Tank?”

“You could just fly home real quick, grab him, and then fly right ba—”

“If I fly home, I’m going straight to sleep. I’m tired…”

Godson sighed. “Ever since I got better a week or two ago… We haven’t spent any time together…”

“I know... “ Dash’s ears flopped back, then slowly came back up to normal as she came up with an idea. “How about this, tomorrow I’ll feed Tank a little extra. Then after work, we’ll go out for a little walk around Ponyville, and maybe we’ll spend the rest of the night together. How’s that sound?”

Godson scratched the back of his head. “Yeah, I suppose that’ll work.”

“Great!” Dash leaped a little bit, using her wings to keep her up high enough to be face to face with him. With a soft kiss to the lips, she smiled. “See you tomorrow, then!”

Godson simply waved a hand. “See ya tomorrow!”

He slowly made his way back inside his house once his marefriend was far enough from his field of view. He stepped into his bedroom, and surveyed the contents of his room. From the time he’s spent in Equestria so far, he just now realized how barren his room seemed to be. The only noticeable things in his room were his bed, a dresser holding an alarm clock and a lamp on top, and his closet door a few feet away from his bed.

Everything else just seemed empty.

“I… should probably start decorating this room more…” Godson muttered to himself. Shrugging it off, he walked to his bed, where his dog already awaited him before she could sleep peacefully. He got into bed, covering himself with the blankets, and drifted off to sleep.

As Godson walked back home from another day of work. He looked around his surroundings, ponies casually treated the human as if he was one of their own, at this point, despite him being taller than everyone.

Once he was at his house, he noticed a note stuck onto his door.

“Godson, I might be a tiny bit late, there’s a soft storm we have scheduled in a few days, and we’re getting most of our clouds ready ahead of time. So don’t just sit there and bore yourself to death until I get back. I’ll find you whenever I’m done. ~Dash”

With a roll of the eyes, Godson looked up to see if he could see his marefriend doing anything with the weather above him. Unfortunately, he saw nothing but a clear sky, not a single cloud in sight.

Knowing his date would be delayed by what Dash claims to be “a tiny bit late”, he contemplated on what he could do to kill time until his marefriend returned.

Well. He could always visit Applejack… But after the whole “f—buck a tree” incident, he’d rather not.

Rarity seemed like another decent choice, and then remembered the pink “I <3 Ponyville” shirt he was forced to wear until she made more suitable clothes. And he'd rather not go through something like that again.

He could always visit Pinkie—

Fluttershy probably wouldn’t mind the visit...but would her animals?

“Welp. Guess I’m visiting Twilight.”

Being only a short distance away from the alicorn’s home, he took the initiative and mentally set a course to her library-home. Wasting little energy to run over to the Golden Oaks Library, he proceeded to knock on the door, only to hear a soft “it’s open!” from inside. With a shrug, he opened the door, making his next few steps into the treehouse.

Twilight looked over to the door behind her, upon realizing who her visitor was, she closed a book she had levitating in front of her.

“Godson?” Twilight cocked her head to the side. “What brings you here?”

“Well. Boredom, mostly.”

“Do you wanna test a spe—”

“After the whole thing with Lyra? Yeah, no...”

“Fine…” Twilight rolled her eyes. “So then, what’s the problem?”

“I told you already, I’m just bored.” Godson shrugged. “Dash is still caught up at work, so I came to see what you were up to. Maybe you were doing something interesting that could calm my boredom for a while.”

Twilight raised an eyebrow. “So, you’re looking into something that’ll end your boredom, eh?” Her horn suddenly began to glow with its familiar purple aura, casting a levitation spell on the book she had just previously closed. Once the book was in front of her, it opened up to the page she had been working on. “Well, perhaps you could help me figure out this spell…”

“What’s it do?”

“Well. It’s a work in progress, but in theory, it should allow the caster to transform his-or-herself, or any other willing subject into any being. Of course, there are a few exceptions and limitations of the spell, but they’re not that important.”

Godson placed a thinking hand on his chin. “Sounds interesting. Mind if I take a look?”

Twilight nodded, and the book floated over and spun around for Godson to get a better view of the pages.

Godson grabbed his glasses from his face, folding one arm, and folding the other one at the neck of his shirt, allowing it to hang from there. He slowly reached his arms over to the book to grab it.

“Don’t touch the book. Just look at it.” Twilight interrupted.

He looked at the alicorn, and blinked. Raising an eyebrow, his hands fell back down to their normal position, and he leaned over slightly to get a better look at the book. Examining the page, he could see a lot of foreign symbols, jumbled letters, and, strangely, some math.

“There’s this one equation that’s bugging me. It’s supposed to fit with all the spell’s parts, but it just… doesn’t.” Twilight groaned. “Maybe you could figure it ou—”

“Ew, math.” Godson looked up to the alicorn. “Sorry, can’t really help ya there.”

“Oh.” Twilight blinked. “I didn’t know you weren’t good at math.”

“It’s not that I’m not good at it. It’s just that I don’t like doing it.” Godson shook his head.

Twilight narrowed her eyes. “Right…”

Godson shrugged, grabbing his glasses from his shirt, and placed them back where they belong. “So, speaking of magic… Is there a way to not get completely screwed over by it?”

Twilight tilted her head. “What do you mean?”

“Well, I mean, like… is there a way to avoid, or… resist the effects of spells?”

“Depends on the spell being used.” Twilight replied. “You gotta be more specific.”

“What about the truth spell, for example?”

“Ah. Yes, there are a few spells like the truth spell, in which their effects can be blocked. But you have to have a constant exposure to the spell, and train your body to ignore it. And even then, some of those spells have a ‘higher version’ that can be applied. So it’s not even a guarantee you’ll even be able to handle those.” Twilight explained. “And even that, something like that has only been examined with ponies, I’m not 100% sure if other creatures, such as yourself, could do the same.”

“Do you think you could try and help me?” Godson raised an eyebrow.

“What for?”

“Well. You girls are always saving Equestria from nearly everything. If I were to get in the middle of it, say, perhaps I was kidnapped, and the kidnapper knew how to use magic, I’d be screwed.” Godson crossed his arms. “They could literally just zap any information out of me.”

Twilight scoffed. “We’d get you out of there before they even dare try.”

“And what if you can’t?” Godson queried. “What if you girls had to focus on something more important than saving me? Or if you would get there just a little late? Anything can happen, Twilight.”

“...I suppose so…”

“So, could you help me?”

Twilight thought on the human’s request for a moment, then slowly nodded. “Yeah. I’ll help.”

“Great, I’ll come by everyday after work, and we can work on that?”

“Sure, that’ll work.” Twilight nodded once more.

“Cool.” Godson nodded back. “Uh, also, could we keep this between us?”

“Why?”

“Well. If something were to happen to me…” Godson began. “You’d all know I’d be fine for a little while since I’ll have had training to hold on for long enough for you girls to come and get me. So you wouldn’t worry.”

“Isn’t that the whole point?”

“That’s the thing, if whoever it is sees you’re not worried for me, then they’ll have no use for me, and just… er…”

“So you want us to actually worry, that way they’ll be focused on getting whatever they need out of you long enough for us to come get you again…”

“Exactly…”

Twilight nodded in agreement. “That’ll work, actually. It actually could help serve as a distraction if we ever need one.”

“See? It’s a win-win!”

“Alright, Godson. You have a deal.”

Godson casually waited at home. It had been 30 minutes since he found the note at his door, and since then it’s gotten surprisingly colder outside. In fact, it was cold enough to the point where the human felt like he needed to wear a jacket. In reality, it wasn’t even all that cold, but regardless the human still wore the jacket, keeping himself warm from whatever cold he felt.

He slowly began petting his dog, whom sat on his lap, as he rested on the couch. He wondered when his marefriend would arrive, but soon enough, he heard a knocking on his door. He removed Linda off his lap, stood up from where he sat, and walked over to the door. With a twist of the knob, he pulled the door open, and was greeted by his marefriend, smiling softly as she stood outside.

“Sorry I’m a little late…” Dash teased. “I’m guessing you read the note I left?”

“Mhm.” Godson nodded. “I read it. You took a little longer than a tiny bit.”

Dash chuckled softly. “I know, I was expecting to be there only for a good ten, maybe fifteen minutes. But they kept taking forever…”

“And I assume this cold temperature is your doing?”

Dash shook her head. “Pegasi control weather, not temperature.”

“Isn’t they the same thing?”

“Nope.” Dash shook her head once more. “I assume that’s why you’re wearing that jacket?”

“Uh. Maybe…” Godson smiled sheepishly.

Dash chuckled softly, then shivered at the cold breeze that had suddenly rushed to her. “Yeah, I see what you mean. It’s getting colder even as we speak… I might have to fly real quick to my house and grab a sweater or something…”

“You sure?” Godson raised an eyebrow. “What if there was another way of staying warm?”

“And that is...?” Dash cocked her head to the side.

“We... could share my jacket...”

“Uh.” Dash blinked. “Godson. I’m no expert or anything, but… I don’t see how the both of us can share a jacket…”

Godson shrugged. “Easy.” He kneeled over, and grabbed his marefriend, pulling her close for a kiss. Having been caught off guard, Dash simply hummed softly in curiosity, but then quickly shrugged it off as she wrapped her hooves around the human, closed her eyes, and pushed back into the kiss.

She could hear a soft zip, but she paid no mind to it, and focused on the matter at hoof.

Once the human’s plan was through, he slowly pulled back, leaving the mare in her dreamy state. As she slowly opened her eyes, she saw her lover’s face, looking back at her with a smile. One thing she noticed, was that she was significantly warmer than she was earlier. When she looked around, she noticed she was also higher up, realizing the human was now standing, with her still in his embrace. She then looked at the jacket the human was wearing, and how it seemed to stretch at a certain point. She turned her head more, as far as her side, and realized she was now also being covered by his jacket.

“So. This is how you plan on sharing your jacket?” Dash raised an eyebrow. “You’re gonna stretch out your jacket, and then Rarity’s gonna kill you.”

“Nah, I have a spare jacket in the closet.” Godson smirked softly. “This can be our jacket, now.”

Dash looked up at the human, her face slowly starting to grin slyly. “So, what is it that you plan on doing today, Godson?”

“Hm… Maybe we’ll go for a walk around the park, watch a movie, and maybe…” He slowly leaned his head closer, pressing his lips softly against hers, then pulled back in an attempt to tease the mare trapped in his jacket. “...you could spend the night with me?”

“Maybe…” Dash’s smile slowly grew larger. “I just hope you’re fine with me bringing Tank over.”

“Sure, I don’t mind.” Godson shrugged. “We’ll stop by on our little walk.”

“Great!” Dash cheered. “Now, uh, could you let go of me? I don’t, uh, wanna be seen like this out in the public.”

“Hm?” Godson hummed softly, walking out the door to his house. “No can do, Dashie.”

“What?” Dash raised an eyebrow. “Godson, I have an image to maintain! I can’t be seen as a big, soft, sap!”

“You’ll still have your image, Dash.” Godson rolled his eyes. “They’ll just see that you also have a soft spot.”

Dash quickly tried to escape from the human’s trap, using any movement she could make in an attempt to get out of the jacket.

“Nnnn~! Godson! Let me go!”

“Stop squirming, Dash…” Godson muttered softly. “You’ll draw attention, and then they’ll think I’m foal-napping you or something…”

After enough struggling, and the human’s warning, she stopped, and accepted the fact that she wouldn’t be able to escape. She looked around, noticing that they were already a little far from her boyfriend’s home. She continued looking around her surroundings as they passed by a few shops, restaurants. Luckily for her, no one seemed to notice she was even being held by the human in the first place.

She slowly started to feel a little more comfortable being held like this. She sighed blissfully, letting herself relax as her human carried her around, and rested her head on his shoulder.

The human looked down at the soothed mare, pausing his walk. He reached a hand over to her, and caressed her head softly, earning a soft hum of approval. She lifted her head, and looked back at him with a soft smile. Noticing how relaxed the mare was, he brought his lips closer to hers, and slowly kissed her. While Godson was aware of where he was standing, it seemed as if Rainbow had completely forgotten they were out walking. As she lovingly hummed as she felt his lips caress against hers.

As the two kissed, other ponies that passed by would either stop to see why the human was standing still, and see the two of them, only to just stand and stare. Others would simply pass by, not caring whatever it was the human was doing. And others would pass by and notice the both of them, walking away with soft “awws”.

The two slowly pulled apart, smiling softly over their display of affection. However, their smiles were cut short, as Dash immediately remembered the fact they were in public. She quickly looked around, seeing the few who stayed to stare. Her face quickly began to turn into a bright shade of red, which seemed to be enough for them to walk back and continue their own walks.

“This is exactly what I’ve been trying to avoid…” Dash whispered with a groan.

“Yet you revel in all the attention when we’re alone…” Godson whispered back. “You know you love it when I give you all this attention.”

“...Maybe…”

Godson chuckled. “We’ve been together for two weeks, and look at us.”

“We’re freakin’ crazy.” Dash chided.

“Crazy in love, maybe.” Godson snickered.

“Shut up.” Dash buried her muzzle in his neck, hiding the mad blush returning to her face.

Godson simply let her, and continued their walk. The rest of the walk was mostly silent, Dash had kept herself hiding, hoping she wouldn’t get noticed. By the time they had reached the park, they’d come across more ponies that would “aww” as the couple passed by. Every now and then there was also the occasional “is that Rainbow Dash?”, but they were usually too far away for them to fully see the two, and they were so few compared to everyone else that they passed by.

By the time Godson decided he was done walking, he made his way over to Dash’s house.

“Dashie…” He patted her head softly. “We’re here.”

Dash slowly lifted her head up, looking up at the human. She looked around, slowly recognizing the area, then looked up to see her home up in the sky.

“Uh… Could you let me go…?”

“Oh, right.” Godson nodded, grabbing the zipper to his jacket, and pulling it down enough for his marefriend to be able to move.

Once she was able to stretch her wings, she flew up to her house, leaving him to wait outside.

He zipped up his jacket once more, knowing he wouldn’t be able to pull the same trick again. After a few minutes, he could hear the door close. Dash flew back down to the ground, with her turtle, who also flew with her thanks to his magic helicopter rotor.

“‘Kay, let’s go.” Dash said. “It’s freakin’ cold out here, the sooner we get back, the sooner I can wrap myself in some blankets…”

Godson nodded, and swiftly began making his walk back home.

“Actually, Godson…?”

He stopped in his tracks, and turned around.

“...Is there still room for me in that jacket?”

“I can’t believe the movie ended like that! That’s not at all how I expected it to go!” Dash walked into the bedroom.

“I know, right?” Godson replied, walking in behind her. “Bah, it wasn’t that bad of an ending, though.”

“They literally left it at that cliffhanger just so they could make a sequel!” Dash countered.

“Then that makes more of a reason for us to go to the theaters later on.” Godson shrugged, jumping right into bed and covering himself. “Anyway, thanks for spending the night, Dash.”

“Are you kidding?” Dash raised an eyebrow, getting into bed as well. “This place would be empty without me!”

“Well. If it’s so empty without you, maybe you should move in with me.” Godson joked.

Dash slowly went wide-eyed. “...Are you asking me to move in with you?”

“Huh?” Godson raised an eyebrow, only to quickly shrug. “I was just joking. I mean, if you want to…”

“Oh.” Dash reverted back to normal. “Okay, yeah.”

“Alright. Well.” Godson attempted to stifle a yawn. “G’night, Dashie…”

“Night, Godson…”

The two slowly closed their eyes, and attempted to drift to sleep. Dash, however, seemed to have a little difficulty trying to sleep. She shivered slightly at the cold, which only made her attempt to cover herself more with the blankets, but unfortunately, her attempts to do so were futile.

“...Godson?”

“Hm…?”

“...C-could we...cuddle, just a bit?” Dash asked softly. “...I’m cold…”

Godson slowly spun around to face the mare, then opened his arms wide enough for her to scoot over to. Once she got close enough, he wrapped his arms around her, feeling the warmth of her body against his.

Now that she was warmer, the mare attempted to go to sleep. But yet, there was still something on her mind.

“...Godson…?”

“Yes, Dashie?”

“...About that ‘move in’ offer…”

Chapter 1-6: A Celestial Visit

Godson groaned softly, carrying yet another box of his marefriend’s stuff into his own home. What was first a simple joke to him, turned into a fully fledged plan for the both of them.

They had now been official for a month now, and already they agreed on moving in together.

“Y'know, Dash…” Godson spoke. “When they said you were the fastest mare in Equestria, I didn't think that applied to relationships…”

“I know.” Dash replied. “I'm not exactly the greatest when it comes to things like… well, dating.”

“You're not exactly the best at being patient, either.”

“Hey!” Dash retorted.

“Luckily you have someone equally as impatient as you are.” Godson winked at the now annoyed mare.

“Hmph.” Dash huffed.

“Relax, Dash.” Godson chuckled. “I’m just teasing you. Sure, we’ve been together a month now, but I’m glad to have you at the house with me! You never have to worry about leaving tank alone, we have more time to spend together… So far, I’m only seeing pros, and no cons.”

“Yeah.” Dash nodded. “Besides, it starts to get lonely sleeping at my own house knowing I could just spend the night with you…”

“Actually, you moving in might help me a bit.” Godson added.

“How so?” Dash raised an eyebrow.

“I’m pretty sure you’ve noticed by now that my bedroom’s almost barren.” Godson pointed out. “Y’know, with all the times you’ve been in there...”

“Ha, ha…” Dash narrowed her eyes. “Very funny.”

“What?” Godson raised an eyebrow. “I didn’t mean it like that. Geez, you’re so dirty minded sometimes.”

“Me!?” Dash gawked. “What about you!?”

“What about m—”

“Every time we pass by any cylindrical object you see in any store you ask if I’d like to try it!”

“And does it bother you?”

“Just a little bit…”

“That means it’s working.” Godson chided.

Dash sighed softly. “You’re telling me you’ve been doing it all this time just to bother me?”

Godson paused for a moment, thinking of the most appropriate response. “Kinda.”

Dash chuckled. “You’re a jerk, you know that?”

“Alright, fine. I won't do it anymore…”

“Thank youuu~.”

Eventually, they arrive to the human’s house. Dash opened the door, allowing him to enter first. As she waited for him to enter, she heard a whooshing sound above her. She looked up quickly, and saw a familiar carriage carrying a large mare to somewhere in Ponyville.

“Hey…” She spoke up. “What’s Celestia doing here in Ponyville…?”

“Hm?” Godson mumbled from afar, lightly putting the box down to go see what she was talking about. She pointed up to the carriage as it flew by.

“Huh. I’m… not sure, Dash.” He stated. “Maybe she’s visiting Twilight?”

“Maybe.” Dash shrugged. “Should we go check it out, later?”

“Yeah, I guess…”

They shortly made their way to Twilight’s library, once they were close enough they could hear the two princesses talking about something.

“Godson.” Dash pulled him, stopping him in his tracks. “I hear them talking… I don’t think it’s a good idea right now to be interrupting.”

“Pfft.” Godson scoffed. “And miss out on a chance to meet Celestia after the whole ‘Take Over Equestria’ incident? No thanks.”

“But—”

Before Dash could even finish her sentence, Godson opened the door slowly, making his way inside the library.

“Well… I suppose that explains your visit…” Twilight sheepishly smiled.

“AYYY!” Godson shouted. “IT’S FREAKING CELESTIA!”

Celestia turned her head around quickly, nearly ready to attack the sudden intruder. But then paused as soon as she was able to make out who it was.

“The beast is back…?” Celestia muttered, turning her head back over to Twilight. “You never mentioned the beast returned…”

“Oh. You mean Godson?” Twilight raised an eyebrow. “I thought I mentioned him in one of my letters…?”

“Oh. Right.” Godson chuckled sheepishly. “About that…”

“What’d you do, Godson…” Twilight rolled her eyes, and quickly narrowed them soon after.

“I… uh, kinda made a deal with Spike not to have any mention of me anywhere in your letters.” He responded with a sheepish smile.

“What exactly did he get in return?”

“Uh…” Godson scratched the back of his neck. “...Romance tips?”

“Huh.” Twilight blinked. “That explains his frequent visits to Rarity’s boutique recently…”

“Yep.” Godson nodded. “Pretty much…”

“And… what exactly did you gain by doing so?” Celestia tilted her head to the side.

“The ability to scare the total crap out of you by shouting ‘AYYY, IT’S FREAKING CELESTIA’.” Godson deadpanned.

The two alicorns sighed over the human’s response.

“So what are you doing here anyway?” Godson asked curiously.

“I felt a large amount of magical disturban—”

“I blame Twilight.”

“What!?” Twilight exclaimed. “What did I do!?”

“Screw something up?” Godson shrugged. “I dunno, considering you left me frozen for nearly the whole day, I’m just gonna blame you for whatever magical disturbance Celestia felt.”

“And who’s fault was that for you being frozen?”

“Yours.” Godson rolled his eyes.

“...Oh right…”

“So, I guess you fixed the magical disturbance?” Godson looked up to the larger mare.

“...For the most part, yes.” Celestia nodded.

“Great.” Godson nodded back. “...That’s cool…” Soon after, a wave of awkward silence flooded the room. Even Dash, who was still standing outside, had no idea what to say next to end the silence.

Then, Godson spoke up once more. “So… how’s Luna? You two still making rigged bets?”

Celestia laughed softly. “Sometimes.”

“How many bets have you two made since the last time we’ve met?”

“Oh… about twenty-one times?” Celestia guessed. “I think that’s about right.”

“Heh. That’s kinda funny, actually.” Godson commented.

“What about you? If I recall correctly, you were dared to take over Equestria.” Celestia pointed out. “How’d that turn out with your friends?”

“Well. He didn’t believe me at first. But let’s just say he owes me some money, now…” Godson explained.

“So, what brings you back to Equestria, then?” Celestia raised an eyebrow. “Planning to finish some large dare again?”

“Actually… I’ve been stuck here for about… four and a half months? Yeah, seems about right.”

“Oh?”

“I blame Twilight.”

“Of course you do…” Twilight rolled her eyes.

“I assume she’s been helping you find a way back home, then?” Celestia inquired.

“You assume wrong, Celestia.” Godson shook his head. “Actually, I told her to just forget about it. I’ve actually made a living here in Equestria, now.”

“Is that so?” Celestia cocked her head to the side.

“Yeah.” Godson nodded. “In fact, I’ve even been dating somepony.”

“Allow me to guess…” Celestia narrowed her eyes. “Despite all the blaming, you’re dating Twilight?”

“What!?” The two shouted in shock.

As they were about to argue, Celestia simply laughed at their reaction. “Relax, I’m only teasing.” Despite her laughing, she soon focused on another thought. “Although, I’m surprised to hear somepony has taken an interest in you.”

“...Is that an insult?” Godson raised an eyebrow.

“It could be…” Celestia smirked softly.

Godson scratched the back of his head. “I’m… not sure how to feel about that.”

“In all seriousness, however.” Celestia placed a thinking hoof on her chin. “A human-pony couple is something I wasn’t expecting to hear from you, especially after finding out you’ve been here for so long without my knowledge…”

“Is there a problem with that?”

“Not at all.” Celestia shook her head. “If anything, you’ve earned my respect.”

“Huh?”

Celestia nodded. “You were able to spend four and a half months in Equestria without any mention of you at all to me. That has to be worth something.”

“So basically you’re calling me a ninja?”

“...No?” Celestia spoke. “That’s not at all what I was saying…”

“Oh.” Godson blinked. “Wait. Then, what were you saying?”

“I’m saying you went through all this trouble of making sure I wouldn’t know you were here, waited for me to arrive here one day, just to scare the daylights out of me.”

“...And?”

“...That was quite an excellent prank.” Celestia giggled.

“...What?” Twilight and Godson blinked dumbfoundedly.

“I’ve pulled so many pranks on Luna before, and they were nothing as large scaled as yours.” Celestia pointed out.

“Where are you going with this, Celestia?” Godson crossed his arms.

“...I may require your assistance in pranking Luna.”

“So… let me just catch up on what just happened…” Dash spoke slowly. “Princess Celestia... wants you… to help her prank Princess Luna tomorrow? Did I hear her right?”

“I’m having a hard time believing it myself…” Godson replied. “But… yeah, I think so…”

“Huh…” Dash blinked. “That’s… actually pretty funny.”

“It’s also a bit nerve-wracking…” Godson sighed. “Now I’m expected not to fail in front of Celestia.”

“Oh, please.” Dash rolled her eyes. “If you can handle not being noticed by Celestia for four and a half months, I’m pretty sure you can easily do the same to Luna.”

“Are you implying I’m not important enough to not—”

“No I’m not!” Dash interrupted. “I’m saying that you were able to avoid any mention of you ever to Celestia for four and a half months, I don’t know how you did it, and I really don’t care how to be honest. But you did it. I’m pretty sure you can just as easily stay out of Luna’s radar for however long you and Celestia plan for.”

“Are you impl—”

“No!”

“Did that bother you?”

“Very much so!”

“That means it worked.”

“GODSON, YOU IDIOT!”

Chapter 1-7: A Lunar Prank

“Why did I ever think this was a good idea?” Godson thought to himself. Holding back a groan as he and Celestia rode her carriage back to Canterlot.

The only problem was, since there was no room for him, and Celestia wanted to sneak him into Canterlot without anypony noticing, even her own royal guard, so she came up with an idea.

She’d magically glue him to the bottom of the carriage.

And she did.

As the carriage finally made it’s way back in front of the castle, it slowly set a collision course back to the ground, something that frightened the human.

“I swear to God if the bottom of this carriage hits or even scrapes into something, I’m gonna go to Equestrian jail for assassinating Celestia.” Godson thought. “...Does Equestria even have a jail? Oh wait, that’s tartarus. No, wait... that’s their equivalent of hell…”

Fortunately for him, as he was having a nice, pleasant conversation with the back of his mind, the human had soon zoned out to the point where he didn’t even realize they had already landed.

“Would you like us to accompany you back to the castle, Princess?” asked the Guards.

“No, I’m sure I’ll be fine on my own.”

“As you wish.”

Godson snapped out of his daze, his view instantly blocked by the ground mere inches below him. He could hear hoofsteps slowly fade away as they got farther and farther away, until eventually, they had left entirely.

Suddenly, he felt an odd feeling in his body, and in a matter of seconds, he began to obey the laws of gravity once more, and fall back onto the ground.

Raising his head slowly, and just enough to avoid contact with the carriage above him, he noticed said carriage moving forwards, until it no longer covered him anymore.

“I still don’t understand why you had to glue me to the carriage” Godson whined.

“Well, there wasn’t exactly enough room for you to fit up here…” Celestia rolled her eyes. “And I needed some way of bringing you here without the guards noticing. Plus, it was funny seeing you freak out while you were stuck to the bottom of the carriage…”

“If you weren’t a Princess, and, y’know, didn’t control the sun… You’d so be dead right now…” Godson grumbled, slowly standing up.

“Mhm.” Celestia nodded. “Sure.”

“So what exactly do you have planned for this ‘massive prank’, anyway?” Godson impatiently raised an eyebrow.

“Um, right…” Celestia placed a hoof on her chin. “I was thinking we could do something similar to what you did to me…”

“You mean like when I scared the daylights out of you?” Godson crossed his arms. “So, what, I’m gonna scare the moonlights out of her?” He quickly shook his head. “No, that’s too basic.”

“Oh, and I suppose you have something better?” Celestia raised an eyebrow.

“When you’re dating someone who pranks a crapton, you tend to pick up on a few things…” Godson shrugged.

“Speaking of your love life…” Celestia cut in. “...You never exactly mentioned who exactly you’re with…”

“That doesn’t matter right now.” Godson shook his head once more. “What does matter, however, is this prank needs to be just as large scaled as not ever being mentioned to you in the four and a half months I’ve lived in Equestria.”

“Alright then.” Celestia nodded. “Let’s hear it. Let’s hear this large scaled prank you have planned.”

“I…” Godson uttered, quickly trying to find an idea to throw before he’d look like an idiot, but ultimately failed. “...uh… don’t exactly have anything planned at this very second…”

“Uh-huh.” Celestia nodded slowly. “I thought as much. So unless you come up with an ide—”

“I got it!” Godson interrupted.

“So quick?” Celestia jerked her head back. “I thought it would’ve took you longer than that…”

“Eh. I’m known for having random ideas at the most random times.” Godson shrugged. “How do you think I managed to get the Elements of Harmony so easily in an attempt to take over Equestria?” He raised an eyebrow. “Or do you not remember that incident?”

“Oh, I remember it clearly.” Celestia smirked. “I also remember you running like a filly as the girls nearly blasted you with them.”

“I’m still not entirely sure how I lived through that…” Godson scratched the back of his neck. He soon heard a soft laugh from the alicorn mare in front of him, and quickly shrugged it off.

“Anyway.” He shook his head. “I like where you went with the whole ‘scaring Luna’, thing, but I don’t think it’s enough.”

“How so?”

“How about something like, you turn me invisible for a bit so the guards don’t see me, and just stuff me in some room, and then you lure Luna into that room, and then I scare her.” Godson thought aloud.

“...That’s it?” Celestia blinked. “That’s your large scale prank?”

“What?” Godson crossed his arms. “It’s the best I could do on such short notice…”

“If we’re gonna going to make this a large scale thing, it needs to be big. Like, ‘stealing her crown’ big.” Celestia pointed out.

“That might work, actually.” Godson commented.

“Allow me to guess, you have another idea?”

“Well, you’ve inspired me. What can I say?” Godson shrugged. “I think I’ve finally got it now.”

“Let’s hear it.”

“You turn me invisible, stuff me a room, et cetera, et cetera.” Godson rolled his eyes. “That part’s still the same, but. You talk to Luna about how your trip to Ponyville was, or, something… I don’t really care.” He made a vague gesture with his hands. “And then as you leave the room, you turn invisible, and you float Luna’s crown all the way to my room. She’ll be chasing it all the way to me, and when she opens the door I’ll just be sitting back on a chair, wearing her crown, and just being chill about everything.”

“That’s…” Celestia spoke softly. “...Actually a great idea! I can imagine the look on her face, already. Beast, that’s the most—”

“I’m also going to need a banana.”

“What?”

“A banana.” Godson deadpanned. “Do you not have those in this world?”

“We do…” Celestia nodded. “But… what difference will that ma—”

“I neeeed. A banaaaaana.”

“Bu—”

“CELESTIA DON’T QUESTION MY LOGIC AND JUST GIVE ME MY BANANA!

Luna sat down on her throne, groaning softly at the lack of events happening recently. Besides Celestia taking a visit to Ponyville over some “magical disturbance”, almost nothing significant happened. It was almost as boring compared to eight and a half months ago, when that “beast” arrived, and they helped him in completing a dare against his friends.

She could only wonder where he is now, and what’s happened to him since then.

He made things entertaining, even if it was for about a day.

“I’m baaaaack!” Celestia said in a sing-song voice. “Anything interesting happen while I was gone, Luna?”

Luna shook her head. “Absolutely nothing, Sister. I had hoped something would happen in your absence, but to my avail, it was yet another day of sitting on the throne, doing nothing.”

“What about Discord?” Celestia raised an eyebrow. “Couldn’t you have just called him to help make something happen?”

“While a great idea, Sister, I’ve already tried that.”

“And?”

“He made a chocolate rain cloud, and then left.” Luna rolled her eyes with a groan.

“Ah.” Celestia nodded. “Well, my trip to Ponyville wasn’t as exciting as a chocolate rain cloud, but at least Twilight was telling me about a few things she discovered.”

“I assume that’s why you spent the night?”

“Mostly.” Celestia shrugged. “She was telling me about a portal spell she came up with.”

“And how useful did it prove to be?”

“Not very much.” Celestia shook her head. “The portal only seems to be a one way trip.”

“Well, couldn’t you just reca—”

“From the opposite side.”

“Yep.” Luna deadpanned. “That’s useless.”

“Mhm.” Celestia nodded. “Told you.”

“Well.” Luna leaned back on her throne. “I suppose it’s just gonna be another one of those days…”

“I don’t suppose you’re planning another bet just to keep this entertaining, are you?”

“Hm?” Luna raised an eyebrow, then shook her head. “Not today, Sister. Last time I relied on Discord to help me, I don’t think he’d help me out this time.”

“Alright then.” Celestia nodded. “In that case, I’ll just be checking on a few things.”

“That’s fine.” Luna made a shooing gesture with her hoof. “I’ll be here...doing nothing...”

Celestia rolled her eyes at her younger sister’s boredom, and turned around, making her way out the room.

Luna sighed, laying back as she closed her eyes in an attempt to sleep the day away.

Unfortunately, she was unable to do so, as the minute she had closed her eyes, she suddenly felt her crown seem to float away from her head. She looked up, seeing the flying crown above her head, raising an eyebrow, she grabbed it, and placed it back onto her head.

However, it didn’t help at all.

The crown floated away from her head once more, this time, moving away from her.

“What is this foolishness? Crown, get back here at once!” Luna shouted angrily.

Though despite her loud commands. The crown did the complete opposite, and flew away, leaving the room entirely.

At first, she was confused, but then she quickly picked up on what was going on, and chuckled. “Sister…” She walked up to the exit of the room, getting ready to look out to see her sister sitting somewhere, most likely laughing. “If this is another one of your pranks…”

She peeked her head out, looking around, instead of seeing her sister, she saw the crown continuing its trip to who-knows-where.

“Hey! Where do you think you’re going?!” She exclaimed, running towards the crown in a futile attempt to catch the crown. The closer she got, the farther the crown got, every turn it made, she made as well. Eventually though, the crown finally reached a dead end, all that was left was a door and the speeding alicorn rushing towards it.

Determined, Luna maintained her speed, running as fast as she could to grab the crown before it had a chance to react, once she felt she was close enough, she made a leap of faith to grab it while it was still in the air.

Unfortunately, before Luna could even touch it, the crown vanished in a white light, causing her to crash into the door. With a huff, she got up, growling at what might be behind the door.

“Whatever it is you are, I will make sure you learn your lesson…” Luna spoke through her growl, her horn lighting up intensely, as well as placing a hoof on the doorknob, and using all her energy to nearly throw the door open. “for messing with a princess—!” Luna shouted, quickly interrupting herself at the odd sight before her. “...huh?”

That odd sight, was Godson. Casually sitting back on a chair, one leg crossed over the other, as well as her forsakened crown atop his head, while also holding a banana in his hand, ready for peeling.

“Hiya, Moonbutt!” Godson smiled, peeling the banana. “How’s it goin’?” He quickly took a bite, completely careless over the alicorn’s anger.

Luna was completely dumbfounded, trying to process the completely casual look in his face as he ate the banana right in front of her. “W-Wha…?” She stammered. “Beast…? You’ve retur—”

“Shhhhhh…” Godson interrupted. “Let me finish my banana.” He held a finger up with his right hand, signaling her to wait, while he took another bite of the banana on his other hand.

“H-How is this possib—”

“LET ME FINISH MY BANANA!” Godson shouted, completely careless over the fact that he was yelling at a princess.

Luna gave the most dumbfounded look ever, giving up on trying to process his casualness, but now simply trying to process the entire situation altogether.

Godson threw the final piece of the banana into his mouth, still holding his finger up as he chewed, and ultimately, swallowed the banana.

He pointed at her, more importantly, her face, and spoke. “Is that the face you were imagining, Celestia?” He instantly broke into a fit of laughter. “Because that’s perfect!”

Before Luna can even utter a word, she heard a loud thump. She looked to her right, and suddenly noticed her older sister, quickly fading back into reality as she had fallen on her side, failing to control her own laughter.

“That was amazing!” Celestia breathed. “I don’t know how you kept that act going, but that was Grade-A perfect!”

Luna jerked her head back, her eyes widening as she watched the two laugh like maniacs.

“H-Huh!?” She dumbfoundedly spoke. “How is it that you’ve returned!?”

Godson attempted to stifle his laughter enough to get a few words out. “Let’s just say Twilight’s portal spell isn’t as useless as you think it is.”

If it were possible, Luna’s eyes would be the size of basketballs, but unfortunately the laughing duo weren’t graced to be able to see such a sight. “Celestia brought you back just for a prank!?”

“Heh.” Godson’s laughter died down, while Celestia still kept laughing as much as a hyena. “Nah. I would be pissed at her if she did. You can blame her student, though.”

“Twilight brought you back?”

“Yep. Can we make that a hashtag? Hashtag blame Twilight?” Godson placed a thinking hand on his chin. “I feel that would be so appropriate right now...”

“Wha—”

“Don’t ask what it is, because I’m not in the mood for explaining things from my world.”

Eventually, Celestia’s laughter finally died down, and she stood up once more. “Oh, geez. That was hilarious… I owe you. This has been the most hilarious thing I’ve been a part of in a long time.”

Godson raised an eyebrow. “Woah, I wasn’t expecting you to owe me anything… I was just doing this just because I could.”

“So you’re saying you don—”

“I’LL GLADLY TAKE YOUR PAYMENTS!

“That’s what I thought.” Celestia giggled, trying not to burst into laughter again.

“Besides…” Godson shrugged. “Four and a half months of being in Equestria and working for Pinkie for most of that time, I could probably use a vacation with my marefriend.”

“Deal.” Celestia winked.

“FOUR AND A HALF MONTHS!?” Luna gawked in shock, causing her sister to begin laughing once more, although not enough to have her fall on the floor.

“Welp.” Godson stood from his chair, placing Luna’s crown back onto her head. “My work here is done.” He quickly made his way out the room. “I’ll be waiting outside so you can take me back home, Celestia.”

Celestia nodded, her laughter slowly dying down once again, as Luna continued to dumbfoundedly stare at the human.

“Oh, and by the way.” Godson spoke loudly from afar. “I’m officially dating Rainbow Dash!”

“You’re what?!” Luna’s pupils shrunk, leaving Celestia to break into a fit of laughter once more.

But then, she immediately realized what he said.

“YOU’RE WHAT!?”

Chapter 1-9: A Ceremony of Stupidity

“Screw you, Twilight. I didn’t want to get dragged back to Canterlot after just leaving it like… yesterday.” Godson groaned.

“Yeah, well. You were the one who decided to be a ninja during your nearly five months in Equestria.” Twilight groaned back.

“What’s that gotta do with anything?” Godson crossed his arms.

“Celestia wants to hold some sort of announcement or something declaring you’re not some sort of monster wanting to destroy all of Equestria, or something…”

“Well…”

“Godson…”

“Fine…”

“Look.” Twilight sighed. “All we gotta do is go in, Celestia does her big announcement, and then we leave. Does that sound so hard?”

“Yes.” Godson nodded. “Very much so.”

Twilight deadpanned at the human, unamused with his response. “Too bad. You’re going anyway.”

“But I don’t wannaaaaaaa!”

Twilight rolled her eyes, her horn aglow as she immediately covered him in her magic aura.

“Too bad!”

In an instant, Twilight casted a spell onto the human, completely rendering him unconscious.

“...Was that necessary?” Dash raised an eyebrow.

“He was being annoying… What do you expect me to do, deal with it?” Twilight raised an eyebrow as well.

“I’ve gotten used to it.”

“So… what is it?”

“This… is the human I pulled from his home…”

“Wait, why did you do that?”

“It’s a long story, Cadance…” Twilight shrugged. “At this point it’s not even worth explaining…”

“Could you shorten it for me?” Cadance asked curiously. “I just wanna have an idea of what happened…”

“Well. Basically, he’s capable of doing stupid things.”

“On a scale of one to ten, how stupid are these stupid things?”

“Uh… They range from 7 to 12.”

“I see…”

Godson groaned softly, raising his head as he scratched the top of it. His vision, while blurred, revealed two blobs staring at him, a purple one, and a pink one.

“Annnnd there he is.” Twilight chuckled softly. “I thought he would of woke up sooner... I didn’t even hit him with the spell that hard.”

Godson raised an eyebrow, looking around his surroundings as his vision began to clear up. Eventually, he began to realize how uncomfortable he was. He looked down to see what excuse of a bed they dumped him in, only to find out it wasn’t even a bed.

He was laying on a wheelbarrow of bananas.

“Can someone explain why I was unconscious on a wheelbarrow of bananas?’ He asked as he raised an eyebrow.

“Oh.” Twilight blinked. “That was Celestia’s idea.”

“Of course it was.” Godson narrowed his eyes in disappointment. “I’m not even gonna bother arguing about it…”

“So you’re the infamous ‘beast’ I’ve been told about this past week.” Cadance thought aloud.

“This ‘beast’ has a friggin’ name.” Godson rolled his eyes, moving around in an attempt to get out of the wheelbarrow.

“Yeah. Twilight told me already.” Cadance nodded, watching as the human eventually fell off the wheelbarrow, tipping it over onto him, piling him in bananas and the wheelbarrow itself. “Uh… Nice to meet you?”

Godson simply waited for Twilight to levitate the heavy wheelbarrow off of him, and stood up once she finally took the hint and did so. “So, judging from your pink… everything… I assume you must be Princess Cadance?”

“Gee, what gave you that idea?” Twilight rolled her eyes.

“You act as if I know everything.” Godson immediately huffed, but then quickly thought about his sentence, which contradicted all of his previous arguments with Twilight. “...Right.”

Cadance eyed the two, trying to understand what they were talking about. “Do I even want to know…?”

Both of them eyed the tall alicorn. “No, you don’t.” They both said in unison.

Cadance blinked, quickly shaking her head as she tried to think of a subject to talk about with the human. “So… Godson…”

“‘Sup?”

“Are you planning on dating anypony anytime soon?”

“Uh.” Godson scratched the back of his neck. “I… I’m already dating somepony.”

“Oh?” Cadance raised an eyebrow. “Nopony told me this during my week here in Canterlot…”

Godson shrugged. “I guess it’s hard for everyone to accept right now?” He shook his head. “I don’t really know.”

“Well, who’s that...uh...lucky somepony then?” Asked a curious Cadance. “Now you have me curious…”

“You’re also very nosey.” Godson huffed. “Already asking about my personal relationships 30 seconds after you met me.”

“Well, she is the Princess of Love.” Twilight rolled her eyes. “Of course she’d ask about these kinds of things.”

“Yeah. Well. I have these things called personal boundaries.” Godson crossed his arms. “And Princess or not, there’s only one mare who’s allowed to ignore those boundaries.”

“And I assume that one mare is your—”

“Yes that one mare is my marefriend.” Godson grumbled. “Geez…”

“Do I know who she is?” Cadance continued her curious pursuit. “See, now I have to know!”

“I… think you’ve met her before...” Godson scratched the back of his head. “I’m not entirely sure…”

“Does she happen to be one of Twilight’s friends?” Cadance asked, wondering if she was getting any closer.

“Y’know, as much as I’d love to continue playing ‘20 Questions’ with you…” Godson cut off Cadance’s pursuit. “I feel like I have better things I could be doing.”

Cadance raised an eyebrow as she watched the human began walking away. “Well. Can I at least ask one more thing?”

Godson stopped in place, and turned his head back. “Shoot.”

“Am I prettier than her?”

Godson narrowed his eyes as the question. “Hm. Let me think about it…” He paused for a moment, building up suspense for Cadance’s question. “No.”

Cadance’s eyes widened as the human left the room. She looked over to Twilight, who simply gawked in shock.

“Do you know who it is?” She asked.

“Yeah.” Twilight nodded slowly. “But I think it’d be better if you heard it from him instead of me.”

As the two were talking, they noticed the human walking back into the room, up to the pile of bananas on the floor, and then proceeded to grab several bananas from the pile, and even go as far as stuff a few into his pocket.

The two alicorns blinked, and the human eventually looked up at the two.

“What?” He spoke. “I may need these later…”

The two alicorns simply remained speechless as he proceeded to stuff a few more into his pocket, and then leave the room.

“...What just happened?” Cadance asked.

“I have a feeling we’re about to witness one of Godson’s dumb moments…”

“Fillies and Gentlecolts!” Celestia spoke loudly. “I am proud to announce that we have a new citizen with us here in Equestria!”

The ponies in the audience several feet below her instantly began their murmuring and their talk, filling the whole area with the constant sound of voices.

“Few of you may have already seen him, and others may have not even heard of his presence in Equestria.” Celestia added. “However, I would like everypony to know, that this new creature means no harm to any of us.”

The audience’s chatter slowly began dying down as Celestia continued her speech.

“This creature has no access to any kind of magic whatsoever. He cannot fly, he cannot cast spells, and while he could have skills that earth ponies have, it would require him thrice as much work to successfully do so.” Celestia explained. “So I would like you all to keep that in mind in case of any event that happens involving him.”

Half of the audience began whispering conversations to each other, while the other half slowly began raising their eyebrows.

“So, without further ado…” Celestia began. “I now present to you… Our first Human in Equestria… Godson!”

The curtains below her open, revealing the aforementioned human casually standing in the center of the stage, his arms crossed as he waited for the curtains to open in the first place.

“Oh.” The human blinked, quickly putting his arms down. “I guess that’s my cue…”

The ponies simply stayed silent, waiting for the human to do something to introduce himself.

Godson paused for a moment, thinking of all the right words to say. Eventually, the best idea came into his mind. “Today! On The Price is Rice!” He began his speech, his voice trying to sound as close to one of those game show hosts. “I’m your host… Godson!”

Everyone immediately raised eyebrows, watching as the human continued his act.

“And today, many of you lucky ponies will get a chance to win…” Godson dug into his pockets, and pulled out multiple bananas. “BANANAS!”

The entirely audience was immediately filled with questioning and concerned voices as the human continued to casually hold the bananas in his hands.

Meanwhile, up above on Celestia’s balcony, Twilight’s hoof met her face as she watched the human continue his stupid act.

“Twilight?” Cadance nudged the unamused alicorn. “Remind me again… He said he was currently dating somepony?”

“Yeah.”

“Is he usually this stupid?”

“Yeah.”

“...Who would find any love towards him?” Cadance gawked in shock.

“You wouldn’t believe me if I told you…” Twilight sighed, looking over to Celestia and Luna.

Luna simply shook her head in disappointment, having been reminded of his prank with Celestia merely a week ago.

Celestia, on the other hand, simply covered her face in her wing, hiding her immense laughter.

It wasn’t until one of the ponies actually spoke up to the human in which all of the princesses reactions meant nothing until this point.

“Excuse me.” A stallion spoke. “How does one win one of those bananas?” Others in the audience glared at the stallion, but he payed no mind to them. “I haven’t had lunch yet, so I’m actually quite hungry…”

“I’m glad you asked!” Godson smiled. “Because you, my good sir, have just won one of these majestic bananas!”

“Really!?” The stallion beamed.

“Yes!” Godson shouted, reaching his arm back with the set of bananas, and throwing one at the stallion.

Unfortunately for the both of them, the banana landed right in the stallion’s face.

The stallion looked down at the banana as it fell to the floor, he simply shrugged, grabbed it, and began peeling it.

The three alicorns jumped as Celestia’s quiet laughter exploded into a fit of pure laughter, even as far as falling onto the floor due to how weak she became from all the laughter.

Meanwhile, Godson continued his act, and began a new plan.

“In fact! Whoever catches any of these bananas gets to keep ‘em!” Godson smiled. “Even if it just touches you, it’s yours!”

Twilight simply just kept a blank face, not even bothering to say anything on the matter. Not one chuckle, not one word, not even a sigh of unamusement.

Cadance, however, was surprisingly holding back a few giggles as she continued to watch.

Luna wasn’t even there anymore, and Celestia was still on the floor, laughing.

“You get a banana!” Godson threw a banana from his pocket onto someone’s face. “And you get a banana!” Eventually, he grabs all the bananas from his pockets, and proceeds to throw the entire set of bananas up into the sky, letting them all fall in random directions. “Everyone gets a banana!”

Eventually, Cadance’s giggles slowly turned into full-on laughter. While not as strong as Celestia’s fit of laughter, it was evident that Cadance was enjoying this just as much as the alicorn on the floor was.

“Well. I can see why whoever that lucky mare is has such feelings for him!” She said through her laughter. “This is hilarious!”

And soon enough, after watching her two fellow princesses laugh, Twilight slowly found herself laughing along with them.

As the princesses continued their laughter, Godson reached for his pockets once more, only to find nothing inside it’s storage.

“Welp.” Godson shrugged, his voice returning back to its natural pitch. “I’m all outta bananas.” He immediately began walking back into the castle. “That’s all, folks!”

In an instant, he closed the doors behind him, leaving the entire audience completely and utterly confused.

“I am back.” Luna said, walking back into the balcony. “What did I mi—”

Before she could process anything else, she simply watched as the other three princess laughed.

“...What happened while I was gone…?”

“I can’t believe you did that, Godson!” Twilight shouted. “What were you thinking, throwing bananas at everypony?”

Godson shrugged. “One of them said he was hungry. What do you expect me to do? Not give him a banana? It’d be unfair if I gave one of them a banana, and not give all of them bananas!”

Twilight facehoofed. “You’re ridiculous. Godson.”

“I’m ridiculous!?” Godson jerked his head back. “I was just keeping the ponies entertained! What did you want me to do, just walk up there, say ‘hi’, and then leave?”

“Yeah. Pretty much.” Twilight nodded.

“That’s boring!” Godson scoffed. “What I did earlier was much more entertaining! Go on, tell me you weren’t laughing.”

“I wasn—”

“And don’t lie to me, Sparkle!”

Twilight narrowed her eyes. “Fine. I may have laughed a little bit.”

“Well. You had me and Celestia laughing our heads off.” Cadance spoke up as she walked into the room. “Now, will you tell me who your special somepony is?”

“Why do you gotta be so nosey?” Godson crossed his arms. “Geez. You’re like that one nosey step-sister that everyone wants nothing to do with.”

“Fine!” Cadance huffed. “Don’t tell me! It’s not like I wanted to help with your relationship or something…”

“How exactly did you plan on helping, anyway?” Godson raised an eyebrow. “Were you gonna grab cupid’s magic bow and shoot our butts with it?”

“If you’re into that sort of thing, sure…” Cadance raised her own eyebrow. “I was planning on giving you a gift for you and your marefriend… Maybe even help intensify your feelings for each other. Because, y’know, I can do that…”

Twilight simply stayed silent, and looked up to the human.

“...What kind of gift we talkin’ about here?”

“Well, maybe if you’d stop being so rude and tell me who she is, I’d tell you.” Cadance grumbled.

“Fineee…” Godson sighed in defeat. “I’m dating Rainbow Dash.”

Cadance laughed at the human’s response. “Okay, seriously. Who is it?”

Godson narrowed his eyes as he crossed his arms, simply staring at the Princess of Love as she awaited the correct answer, despite having already received it.

“...Wait.” Cadance blinked. “You’re serious!?”

Twilight scratched the back of her neck. “Heh… Told you you wouldn’t believe me.”

“YOU’RE SERIOUS?!”

“What’s so difficult to believe about that!?” Godson huffed. “At this point, I’m shocked that you believe I’m dating at all!”

“You’re…” Cadance attempted to process the rest of her sentence. “You’re serious… Wow…”

“Yes.” Godson nodded sarcastically. “I’m as serious as Twilight is about writing to Celestia all the friggin’ time.”

“Hey!”

Cadance finally snapped out of her shock. “Right. Sorry.” She shook her head. “Um… Are you two… by any chance… official?”

“Now that.” Godson rolled his eyes. “Is personal information. You’re basically going a step beyond my boundaries and asking about my sex life.”

“...So is that a yes?”

“Yes.”

“Geez, Godson.” Cadance widened her eyes. “That’s actually really surprising to hear.”

“Why’s that?” Godson cocked his head to the side.

“Well. I assumed that Rainbow… uh… swung the other way.”

“Holy shit, Cadance…” Godson huffed. “Why would you immediately assume that Dash is a lesbian?”

“Uh… Two things.” Cadance spoke softly. “One, the word ‘Rainbow’ in her name. And the fact both her mane and tail are rainbows.”

Godson instantly made a blank expression, then quickly shook his head as he returned to reality. “I happen to enjoy that rainbow mane of hers!” He retorted. ”...And her tail, too…”

“Well. I guess she happens to enjoy you, too.” Cadance smiled. “Glad she was able to find someone to love.”

“I’m… not sure if I should be offended by that or not…” Godson thought aloud.

“Relax.” Cadance patted his back with her hoof. “If you still want that gift for the two of you to use, just let me know.”

“Why can’t I ask for it now?”

“Trust me. You don’t need it right now.” Cadance shook her head.

“Uh... Alright…” Godson nodded slowly. “Welp. Speaking of gifts, I should probably find some sort of souvenir or something for her…”

Godson was sneaking around the castle, looking for a souvenir to give his marefriend, when he noticed out of the corner of his eye, something that seemed to be like fiery feathers inside the room to his right, whose door was slightly open.

“Huh?” He paused in his tracks. “What’s that…?” He peaked through the crack, only to find a familiar phoenix in the room. Having enough experience with wings, he figured he could help remove a few feathers without injuring the bird, or even hurting its ability to fly.

“Welp. Maybe I could use these feathers for something…” Godson thought aloud. “Maybe combine them with something and use it as a gift?”

Shrugging, the human slowly made his way into the room, sneaking up to the magical bird. Once he was close enough, he timidly began caressing its back, giving it the awareness of his presence, but knowing he wasn’t there to hurt it.

Soon enough, he began working his magic, preening the bird’s wings using his hands, similar to how he did so to his marefriend. Little by little, he was able to get several feathers, and even move some back into place, creating a win-win situation for both him and the bird.

Once he had enough feathers, he turned back to the door.

...And unfortunately, there was someone already standing, waiting for him to be noticed.

“So.” Shining Armor spoke. “Sneaking around the castle, and messing with Philomena, huh?”

“You make it sound so sexual.” Godson scoffed. “Don’t you have a wife for that kind of stuff?”

“How was I supposed to know that preening Philomena was enough of a reason for Shining to throw me into jail!?”

“Are you kidding me, Godson!?” Twilight shouted. “What purpose did you possibly have for doing such a thing, anyway!?”

“...I wanted it’s feathers.”

Twilight gave the human a serious look. “...Why?”

“I was gonna use them for a gift for Dash…”

“Couldn’t you have used something else…?”

“I could’ve… But phoenix feathers look so cooooool!” Godson whined. “But, man. Your brother’s strict as hell…”

“He’s both the captain of the Royal Guard and a prince!”

“Wait, marrying Cadance made him a prince?” Godson raised an eyebrow.

“Yes…”

“So that means whoever marries you will also wind up a prince?”

“Yes…?”

“Well, shit.” Godson blinked. “I guess that’s never gonna happen, is it?”

“Godson!”

“What? Your love life is pretty much non-existent!”

“Godson…!” Twilight groaned. “You’re not making this situation any better for yourself…”

“But I’m not wrong… am I?”

“Explain to me how you’re friends with this thing, again?” Shining Armor walked into the room.

“Heeeeeey! It’s shield butt!” Godson cheered. “How ya doin’, pal? I mean, you’ve only been gone five minutes and all… But still!”

“Can I cast a silence spell on him?” Shining asked to his younger sister. “He’s your friend, after all.”

“Eh.” Twilight shrugged. “Nah. Just leave him in there for a few days. He’ll learn his lesson.”

“Twilightwhatareyoudoing?” Godson spoke stupidly quick. “TWILIGHTNODON’TLEAVEME!”

Twilight rolled her eyes, and simply made her way out of the room.

“SHOULD I SLOW DOWN A BIT?” Godson shouted. “TWILIGHT PLEASE DON’T LEAVE ME IN HERE!”

Twilight simply kept walking, as well as her brother following suit.

“I HAVE A WIFE AND THREE KIDS!” He continued to shout like an idiot. “Wait. No I don’t…”

Eventually, the two had left the room entirely, and the door had closed behind them.

“Holy shit…” Godson cursed under his breath. “They actually left me in here…”

He looked around, finding something to occupy himself with, but found nothing.

“Welp. I’m bored.” He deadpanned. “Where’s Dashie when ya need her?”

He looked behind him, finding a hard bed hanging from the wall, he looked around some more, and found what he thinks could be a toilet, but decided against thinking so. He looked back at the door in which Twilight and Shining had used to leave.

“Twiliiiiiiiight!” He called out. “I’m booooooooored!”

No response.

“Twiliiiiiiight!” He called out once more. “I know you’re there! I’m boooored!”

Again, no response.

“Just give me something to entertain myself with! Hell, at least let me see my marefriend for an hour or two!” He called out again, completely careless about whether he was bothering Twilight or not. “Do you know how boring it is in here!?”

In an instant, the door was thrown open. “FINE!” Twilight shouted. “I was only gonna leave you in here for like an hour, but sweet Celestia, it’s not worth it!”

“Why do you gotta be so rude, Twilight?” Godson crossed his arms. “You know I can’t be in some empty place unless I have either something to entertain myself with, or my marefriend.”

“What’s Rainbow have to do with...Y’know what, I don’t wanna know.” Twilight shook her head, opening the cell. “There.” She groaned. “Just stop doing stupid things, alright?”

“Fine.” Godson huffed. “But I want those feathers back.”

“Well you’re not getting them.” Twilight deadpanned.

“Why not?” Celestia poked her head through the door. “If he really needed some feathers, he could’ve just asked…”

Twilight turned her head around. “...Seriously?”

“Well. It’s the least I could do for him helping me out with some stuff around the castle last week, and making me laugh so much earlier today…”

Twilight looked back at the human with narrowed eyes, and sighed.

“You got lucky. This time.”

Chapter 1-10: A "Perfect" Birthday

“So, for Dashie’s birthday, we need to make it bigger and better than it was last year!”

“Why?”

“Why not?” Pinkie tilted her head askew. “Last year’s party was already amazing! Why not make it ten times more amazing!?”

“How does one even do such a thing…?” Godson raised an eyebrow.

“I have my ways, Goddy. I have my ways…”

Godson narrowed his eyes. “Didn’t I tell you not to call me that?”

“There’s no time for that, Goddy!” Pinkie ignored his statement. “We got work to do!”

“Actually, Pinkie…”

“We’re gonna need streamers, balloons, ice sculptures, statues!” Pinkie began listing objects.

“Pinkie…”

“Rainbow-based decorations, rainbow invitations!”

“Pinkie.”

“Party cannons, Rainbow cakes, maybe we can even get Cheese Sandwich to help again!”

“PINKIE!”

“Huh?” Pinkie turned her head back, now having finally noticed the human’s cries for attention.

“I was thinking that… maybe we could do something… different… this time?”

“Like what?” Pinkie raised an eyebrow.

“Well… Like… letting me plan Dashie’s birthday party this year…?” Godson shrugged. “I mean… Dash and I just had a week vacation to ourselves… like… a month and a half ago, I think.”

“B-but…” Pinkie’s ears flopped back. “I’m the expert party planner…”

“I… never said you weren’t…” Godson sighed. “I just want to be the one to be in charge for this year’s party. That way I can make it… I don’t know… special for her, or something…”

“It’s already gonna be super duper special if I’m the one in charge!”

“No, Pink—” Godson cut himself off with a sigh, knowing he would never be able to win this battle. “Y’know what… Nevermind. Forget I said anything...”

“Goddy… I don’t see how you could make Dashie’s party any more special than I could!”

“Because it would have came from me, Pinkie!” Godson half-heartedly barked at the cheerful mare. “I’ve barely done much to show Dash just how much I love her. All I’ve done so far is help take care of her whenever she’d needed me, a few extra dates here and there, and some other stuff that I’d rather not talk about out loud.”

“What about your vacation?” Pinkie cocked her head to the side.

“Yeah. That’s probably the only extra thing I’ve done recently.” Godson replied. “Just let me have this one, Pinkie. You can have the next one, and the ones after that, I don’t care.”

“Well…” Pinkie placed a thinking hoof on her chin.

“Pinkie, please.” Godson practically begged at this point. “All I’m asking is this one time to show her how much I appreciate her.”

Reluctantly, Pinkie sighed in defeat. “Alright…” She spoke softly. “You can have this one, Goddy.”

“Thanks, Pinkie. You won’t regret this!”

Godson simply watched as Twilight placed a rainbow colored blanket on a simple, wooden picnic table, which sat under the shade of a large tree near the river bank. Streamers were thrown on the tree branches, connecting them all to create a more natural vibe. Balloons were tied up on the four edges of the table, as well as on a few wooden posts nearby.

“Goddy?”

“Yes?”

“Is it just me, or does this party look a little bit… basic?”

Godson shrugged. “I’m not that great at planning parties, what do you expect me to do?”

“You could have me—”

“No.” Godson interrupted. “I said I was gonna be the one planning this party. So I’m gonna be the one planning this party.”

“Fine…” Pinkie rolled her eyes. “It’s just this whole… ‘party’ of yours doesn’t seem like it’s good enough.”

“Oh?” Godson raised an eyebrow. “And what do you suggest?”

“More streamers?” Pinkie tilted her head to the side.

“More streamers?” Godson repeated.

Pinkie shrugged. “We could probably use a few sta—”

“No.”

“But…!”

“Pinkie!” Godson interrupted once more. “I don’t want to make this party overly dramatic. We don’t need any over-the-top things. No statues, no party cannons, we don’t need this party to be that huge.”

“No party cannons?!” gasped Pinkie, “What kind of party would this be without party cannons?”

“...You’re right.” Godson blinked. “Just one.”

“Yay!”

Godson looked up, noticing a lack of something important.

“...Y’know, we could probably use a banner or something, huh?”

“I dunno.” Pinkie shrugged. “You’re the one planning this party…”

“Oh, so when I ask for your opinion. You don’t help?” Godson crossed his arms. “I see how it is.”

“Well. If you really wanted my opinion, you’d let me throw in some—”

“Alright, alright. I get your point.” Godson grumbled. “Could you at least help make the

banner for the party?”

“Hm…” Pinkie placed a thinking hoof on her chin, “Only if I get to have two party cannons.”

“How about we don’t have party cannons?”

“Y’know what?” Pinkie quickly said. “One party cannon’s good…”

“That’s what I thought.”

“Easy, easy…” Dash muttered, her eyes blindfolded as her human slowly guided her to where she needed to be. “I thought you didn’t like parties…”

“Yeah, well. I don’t mind a few parties once in awhile…” Godson reassured the mare. “Geez. I try to avoid a few parties, and I get labeled for life...”

“That’s your own fault.” Dash snorted. “Pinkie’s held like a good twenty parties while you’ve been here in Equestria.” She pointed out. “...And you’ve only appeared for… three of them.”

“Yeah well. This one’s different.”

“How so?”

“You’ll see.” Godson ended their talk with a smirk, continuing to guide the mare to the party.

Once they arrived to their destination,as Godson slowly untied the blindfold, Dash glanced around. At first, she had expected something up to Pinkie’s usual standards, but instead found a simplistic banner held up by two branches of two different trees. While the style of the banner was something Pinkie Pie would normally make, the rest of the party didn’t seem to match up. There was a small picnic table at the center of the area, covered by a red and white checkerboard blanket. The table was filled with an assortment of foods, the most noticeable, however, was a four layered vanilla cake, covered in rainbow icing and several candles spread around certain parts of the cake, as well as a mini figure of herself at the very top. There were also chairs laid out around the table, where all of her friends had sat, smiling at her.

The mare immediately raised an eyebrow, confused over the party she had been brought to.

“Surprise!” Godson cheered. “It’s… uh… a picnic party…!”

“Huh…?” Dash uttered. “...Uh.” She quickly shook her head. Not wanting to make anyone feel bad, she quickly forced a fake smile. “W-Wow, guys! I...really wasn’t expecting this!”

As Dash slowly walked closer to the center of the party, she slowly looked around, unamused by the placement of the decorations, and the little amount there were.

“Heh… Pinkie…” Dash sheepishly chuckled. “You went all out… didn’t you?”

“You… don’t like it… do you?” Godson’s smile morphed into a mix of sadness and seriousness.

“I mean… it’s oka—” Dash cut herself off, slowly turning her head back to the human.

He sheepishly chuckled, looking around at the mess he created.

“Y-You…” Dash spoke softly. “You planned all of this…?”

Godson shrugged, ignoring the frowns slowly appearing on everyone else’s faces. “I guess it was a little crap.” He crossed his arms, forcing a chuckle. “I suppose that’s what I get for actually putting effort into something, huh?”

Dash widened her eyes upon her new realization. “N-No…! That’s not what I mean—”

“It’s…fine.” Godson smiled softly. “I probably should’ve just left it to the expert…”

“Yeah you should’ve!” Pinkie cut in, spooking the pegasus, who had now shifted her view to her.

Godson nodded, placing his hands in his pockets. “Yeah, well… I tried.” He turned around. “It’s not my fault that I’m bad at planning parties.” He huffed.

Dash immediately turned her attention back to her human, who was now walking away from the scene.

“Godson! Wait…!” Dash shouted in an attempt to get his attention.

Unfortunately for her, her attempts were futile, as the human seemed to have ignored her.

Pinkie immediately got in her face, blocking her view. “Now that that’s out of the way.”

“Pinkie!” Everyone else, minus Dash, had all shouted at once.

“...What?” Pinkie raised an eyebrow. “I warned him! What do you all expect from me?”

Shortly afterwards, a party cannon, not too far from the party itself, launched an explosion of confetti, however, it didn’t reach very far, and in fact, landed near where Pinkie stood.

“...Welp.” She shrugged.

Dash simply eyed the mare in front of her, then looked back at the massive cake behind her. She slowly walked up to it, examining it closely. Upon closer look, she noticed a few things. For one, the miniature figure of herself was standing on her two rear legs, rather than standing on all fours, as well as her front hooves shaped in a way as if she were hugging something. And while it was hard to notice, but upon even further inspection, the figure’s face seemed to have a lot of time and effort put into it, as it seemed to have a fully detailed face, which was looking up to something, and carried a smile of its own. She raised an eyebrow at the odd detail, curious over the odd decision to do so.

Applejack, sitting on a chair not to far from the pegasus mare, noticed her reaction, and looked up to the figuring. She, too, raised an eyebrow, but not for the same reason that Dash did, for she knew what was missing. She looked back onto the table, finding an important piece to the decoration.

She picked it up with a hoof, and brought it up high enough to grab Dash’s attention. “Is this what you were lookin’ for, sugarcube?”

Dash looked at what Applejack had held in her hoof, and, upon realization, her eyes soon widened as she slowly began to pick it up for herself.

The object she held in her hooves, was another figurine…

...of Godson.

The figurine wasn’t as detailed as Dash’s, the clothes were simplistic, being generic, dark red clothes, but the arms, however, seemed to also appear as if it was hugging something, its face, looked down, carrying a similar smile to the other figuring.

Dash looked back to her figure, then back to the one in her grasp. In an instant, a lightbulb lit up in her head, and she had slowly placed the mini-Godson in front of her miniature self, completing its true form.

She stepped back slowly, now looking at the complete cake in all of its glory, however, she paid no mind to the details on the cake, but rather, the two figurines.

The figurines held each other in a warm, loving embrace, both of them staring at each other's eyes as they smiled, almost seeming not to care about anything in the world, but the two of them.

“Did…” Dash finally spoke. “...Did Godson make this?”

Pinkie looked at the figurines at the top, then back at Dash. “The figurines, or the cake?”

“The fig—”

“Cause he made them both.”

Dash paused, then blinked as she turned her head to the cheerful mare next to her. “...What?”

Pinkie nodded. “I insisted on planning the party, but Goddy refused to let me make the cake, whether I was the one planning the party, or not.” She giggled softly. “I guess all that time he spent working at the bakery with me paid off, huh? He’s still bad at planning parties, though...”

The sight of all the work that she now knew Godson threw effort into, slowly brought tears to her eyes. She couldn’t help but smile like an idiot at the party around her. While the party decorations itself lacked, it was never about them, the reason why Godson specifically arranged the party this way, inviting only her friends, with very minimal things drawing attention away from the party.

It was not only to keep the attention around her.

But to keep her attention around everyone who cared about her.

It was at that moment, Rainbow Dash knew what she had to do.

“I gotta go after him.”

She flew up to the door, immediately stopping once she was close enough, and landed back onto the ground. She twisted the knob gently, making sure it wasn’t locked, surely enough, she was able to twist the knob all the way. She pushed the door open, and slowly entered the house, then closed the door behind her.

Before she could even go and look around for the human, she had already noticed a speeding Linda making her way over to the mare, practically begging for attention.

“Heya, Linda…” She softly spoke, patting the dog’s head with her wing. “Godson didn’t let you in the room with him, huh?”

Linda seemed to understand what Dash had said, and immediately ran off to the door to the bedroom, signalling her to follow. Once Dash had gotten close enough, Linda had immediately gotten on two her two rear paws, and began scratching onto the door with her front paws.

Dash gently shushed the dog, and pointed back to the living room, where Tank also simply sat in his own little corner, minding his own business. Eventually, Linda took the hint, and ran back in that direction.

Once the dog was minding her own business once again, Dash had slowly turned her head back to the door in front of her. With a soft sigh, she grabbed the doorknob, and gave it a twist. She pushed the door open, and made her way through, wanting to see what awaited her on the other end.

Godson merely lifted his head up from the bed, looking at what entered the room, then instantly plopped his head back onto the pillow once he saw who it was.

“Hm. So, party’s over that quick?” He grumbled. “I’m surprised Pinkie didn’t have some sort of ‘backup’ plan.”

“I told them to wait a little while.” Dash replied. “...I wanted to come see you, first…”

Godson slowly sat up, the blankets falling from him to cover his legs, instead. “It’s your day, Dash. You might as well go enjoy it, at least.”

“I can’t enjoy it unless you’re there with me.” Dash slowly walked up to the bed.

“Eh.” Godson shook his head. “I’d… rather not be reminded of the excuse of a party I made. If I see it again, I’m just gonna get more aggravated that it didn’t live up to your expecta—”

“I thought it was perfect.”

“Huh?” Godson raised an eyebrow. “But I thought…”

“I’ll admit, at first, I was expecting something huge from Pinkie...” Dash nodded, climbing up to the bed, and sitting in front of the now confused human. “...But then I saw the cake you made…”

Godson blinked. “You did, huh…?”

“Mhm.” Dash nodded slowly. “And do you know what I have to say about it?”

Before the human could ask, Dash lunged herself forward, tackling the human down back down onto the bed as she wrapped her hooves around the human, pressing her lips against his as she held him down. Shortly afterwards, she pulled back, leaving the human both dazed and confused.

“I loved it.” She smiled. “Everything you did. All the work you put into it all… I loved it.”

Godson slowly wrapped his arms around the mare, and smiled back.

“Well, I mean. I’m no Pinkie… but I didn’t think it was that go—”

“It was perfect.” Dash interrupted. “You planned everything in such a way to make it so nopony would be drawn to the party decorations. Because the real party was all of us, together, celebrating my birthday.”

Godson chuckled. “I didn’t think I had it in me to make such an awesome party…”

“Mhm.” Dash nodded, ignoring his selfish comment this one time. “But it wouldn’t be as perfect as it should be if you weren’t there to celebrate it with us.”

Godson slowly rolled over, making the both of them lay on their side. “Just give me a few minutes… I’m a bit sleepy, I really wasn’t expecting to have to do anything else today…”

“Alright…” Dash snickered at the human’s retort, letting him have his moment. Soon, she came up with an amazing idea. She looked at the human, and quickly pecked him on the lips.

“Hey, Godson…?” She spoke timidly.

The human raised an eyebrow. “Hm?” He hummed.

“Could you… plan next year’s party?” Dash asked. “...Exactly the same way you did with this one?”

Godson’s eyes widened. “Are you sure?”

“I’m 120% positive.” Dash nodded.

Godson chortled at the mare’s remark. “If Pinkie’s fine with letting me do it, then… Yeah.”

Dash hummed happily, and quickly reached for another quick kiss.

“And the year after that?”

“Sure.”

“And the year after that one?”

“...Are you trying to ask me to keep planning your birthday party the same way every year?” Godson raised an eyebrow.

“...Only if you want to…”

Godson paused for a moment, thinking about the mare’s offer. Wondering why he shouldn’t, he sealed the offer with his own kiss to his marefriend.

“It’s a deal...”

Chapter 1-11: (Not So) Secret Santa!

“Alright everypony, it’s that time of the year again.”

Godson nudged his marefriend next to him. “I’m calling it now, it’s gonna be a secret san—”

“It’s time for… a SECRET SANTA PARTY!”

“CALLED IT!” Godson shouted off the top of his lungs, practically scaring everypony around him, even the rainbow-maned mare sitting next to him. After quickly realizing his dumb mistake, he smiled sheepishly, returning his attention to his mare.

Surprisingly, though, Pinkie didn’t even seem to be fazed one bit. “See? Goddy’s excited for it!”

I’m not reall—

“So!” Pinkie continued with her plans. “I have stuffed everyone’s names into this top hat that Goddy gave me a few months back!” She quickly pulled a top hat from behind her, shaking it around in an attempt to shuffle the names.

“Each one of you will grab one name from the list, and you will be in charge of getting them a gift.” Pinkie explained. “And you can never tell the pony you’re buying a gift for that you’re their secret santa until the party’s over.”

“Pinkie.” Godson rolled his eyes. “I’m pretty sure we all know how this works.”

“Oh yeah?” Pinkie raised an eyebrow. “Just for that, you’re going first!”

Godson shrugged, not seeming to care in the slightest about Pinkie’s new decision. He got up, and walked over to the top hat in Pinkie’s hoof, and grabbed a small piece of paper from it. He looked at the name listed on the paper, and chuckled…

...For the paper had Twilight’s name.

“Welp. I think this might be a little bit easy for me…” He thought aloud.

“Dashie, you’re next!”

Dash immediately stood up upon hearing her name, walked up to the pink mare, and grabbed a name from the hat.

“Hm. Interesting.” Dash slowly nodded.

“Next!”

“Nope… Nope...” Godson muttered, looking through a shelf of books he found in a store. “C’mon… It can’t be that hard to find a book Twilight doesn’t have…”

Ironically, as if the world was trying to get him to stop complaining, he found the perfect book.

“Aha!”

But, to his surprise, he was caught off guard by a familiar laugh. He turned around sharply, moving the book around so it was behind him, only to find an equally familiar mare now in his field of view.

“Finally found something?” Dash gave a knowing smile as she raised an eyebrow.

“Maybe.” Godson retorted. “It’s probably something for you, and you’re spoiling the surprise just being here…”

“Please.” Dash scoffed. “One, I can tell that’s a book you’re holding behind your back. And two. I don’t read books unless it’s Daring Do, which it isn’t.”

“So? It’s probably a book that I thought you’d take an interest in!”

“You’re Twilight’s secret san—”

“Yeah pretty much.”

“Heh. You got the easy one.” Dash chuckled. “I feel bad for the poor sap who’s stuck with the hardest one.”

Godson raised an eyebrow. “And that is?”

“Uh. Well, depending on who is their secret santa… You, or Pinkie.” Dash bluntly stated.

“But, Pinkie may be the easiest one out of all of us.” Godson cocked his head to the side. “Just buy a cake, or something.”

“...Eh, true.” Dash shrugged. “I have a decently challenging one, though.”

“How so?”

“I’m not telling you!” Dash snapped at the human. “For all you know, it very well could be you!”

“Dash, we’ve known each other for about a year now.” Godson deadpanned. “I’m pretty sure you’d know exactly what to get me.”

“Crap.” Dash muttered. “You’re right.”

“So, who is it?”

“I’m still not gonna tell…” Dash grumbled.

“Alright.” Godson shrugged, continuing in his quest to buy Twilight’s gift by walking over to the register.

“Hey, Godson!”

Godson stopped midway in his journey, and turned around. “Hm?”

“Uh. Quick question.”

“Shoot.”

“What do you get for somepony with a crapton of animals?”

Godson simply deadpanned. “Welp. Thanks for giving it away.”

“What!? No I didn—”

“How many ponies do we know with a crapton of animals?” Godson interrupted.

“Uh…” Dash paused for a moment to think, then instantly groaned as soon as she realized her screw up. “Crap.”

“Exactly.” Godson chuckled. “As for what you should get for her… Uh. I dunno, animal feed, or something?”

“That’s a terrible idea.”

“I never said it wasn’t.”

“...Good point.”

As everypony reunited back at the base of the party, they began to leave their gifts on a large table that was at the very center of the room. Once the table was full of their gifts, big and small, they all sat down a good distance away from it, with Pinkie, the host, standing right between them and the table.

“Alright everypony. We’re finally at the end of our secret santa party!” Pinkie cheered. “I hope you all got the best possible gift you can find!”

“Uh, don’t we have to get up and actually grab our pre—”

“Nope!” Pinkie interrupted. “I will be the one to deliver everypony’s gift, one at a time, that way we can watch as they unwrap their gift!”

“That sounds like a terrib—”

“Twilight! You’re up first!” Pinkie shouted, immediately grabbing Twilight’s gift, and practically chucking it at the alicorn.

Luckily, she was able to stop it from making a crash course to her face with her magic. Shortly afterwards, she narrowed her eyes at the bouncing pink mare, and proceeded to read the note hanging from her wrapped present.

In an instant, Godson felt a strange disturbance in the room. He looked to his left, and was welcomed to Twilight’s immediate death stare, now that she knew he was her secret santa. He simply laughed sheepishly, as he then watched the mare unwrap her present.

To both of their surprise, the book that Godson bought for her was actually a book that wasn’t in her collection.

“Huh.” Twilight blinked. “How’d you know I didn’t already have this book?”

“I may be dating someone who’s isn’t much of a book fanatic.” Godson rolled his eyes. “But that doesn’t mean I’m the same way about them. You don’t think I’ve read enough books from your library to know what you do and don’t have?”

“...Fair enough.”

“Dashie, you’re next!” Pinkie shouted, quickly grabbing what appeared to be a large bottle wrapped in wrapping paper, and instead of chucking it, she ran over to the rainbow maned mare, and gave it to her.

“Oh…?” Dash raised an eyebrow. “Am I gonna like where this is going…?”

“You’re not gonna know until you open it, Dash.” Godson nudged her.

“Welp. Here goes nothing.” Dash immediately dug into the paper, practically ripping it to shreds as she desperately tried to find out what it was.

Upon seeing exactly what it was, Godson’s eyes widened. “Is that…”

“Yup!” Applejack smiled. “It’s a whole 2 litre bottle of my famous cider.”

Dash’s eyes widened upon hearing those words, and her mouth quickly began to drool the more she held it in her hooves.

And then, Godson snatched it away from her grasp.

“Hey!” Dash immediately began reaching for it, only to be blocked by the human’s hand. “Give that back!”

“I’d love to, Dashie. Seriously, I would.” Godson shook his head. “But considering the last time you had your hooves on this much cider… Things didn’t go so well.”

“I can’t say the same, considering how much you enjoyed that night…”

“That was your own fault.” Godson deadpanned. “Do you expect me to turn down an offer for se—”

“Goddy! You’re up!”

Next thing he knew, there was a box on a one-way trip right to his face. He immediately placed the bottle down onto the floor, and shielded his face with his arms to prevent the box from breaking his only pair of glasses. Luckily, it had succeeded, as the box hit his arms, and landed in front of him, instead.

Sighing, he then went ahead and grabbed the box, and slowly unwrapped the top, and opened it.

Before he could even get a look at what it was, Rarity instantly spoke up. “After the whole ‘sharing your jacket with Rainbow Dash’ ordeal, I figured I could do something about that.”

Godson looked into the box, and pulled out another jacket from inside it.

“...So I made a jacket that could actually support the two of you, together.” Rarity finished her sentence with a smile.

Godson looked up to the marshmallow mare, and smiled back. “Wow… Thanks, Rarity! This… this is actually great!”

“Just don’t mess up the other clothes I made for you, and we’ll call it even.”

Soon after, everypony had opened their gifts, and the party was slowly drawing to a close. Pinkie had returned the table to it’s rightful place, and the others were already preparing to leave.

“So…” Dash remarked with a sultry smile. “Let’s say you and I take advantage of AJ’s cider?” She quickly began nuzzling the human, wrapped around in his embrace as they shared his new jacket.

“That sounds very tempting, considering how cold it’s starting to get…” Godson replied with his own smile.

“Well, maybe I could warm you up…” Dash brought her face closer to his, her smile never ceasing as she continued her pursuit.

Eventually, Godson noticed something, he looked up, and raised an eyebrow at the mistletoe that Twilight magically floated above them.

With a chuckle, he looked back at the mare in his embrace. “Would ya look at that, Dash. Mistleto—”

Dash immediately cut his sentence off, pressing her lips against his.

“Heh, I knew that would happen…” Twilight giggled at the two. “I’m glad those two have each other.”

“What about you, Twilight?” Pinkie raised an eyebrow.

“Me?” Twilight raised an eyebrow back. “I don’t see myself as the dating type.”

“Uh-huh. We’ll see about that.”

Chapter 1-12: Familiar Faces

“Pinkie…? What are you doing…?”

“Preparing for a party…?”

“Who’s party?”

“...Yours?”

Godson sighed softly. “I thought we agreed not to have any parties thrown for me anymore..”

“But it’s been a year since you’ve been heeeeere!” Pinkie whined. “How else are we supposed to celebrate that if we can’t throw a party!?”

Godson shrugged. “You could just casually mention it. Y’know, like ‘oh, hey, you’ve been in Equestria for a year now, cool!’ or something…”

“Oh.” Pinkie blinked, her emotion seemingly fading away, but then quickly popping back to normal as she thought of something. “Hey!”

“Hm?” Godson raised an eyebrow.

“You’ve been in Equestria for a year now! Cool!” Pinkie cheered. “I’m still throwing that party, though.” She deadpanned.

“...Of course you are.” Godson rolled his eyes, sighing in defeat. “...Actually, now that I think about it, doesn’t today mark a year and three months?”

“Yeah, but these past three months have been busy for me. So this is the next best thing!”

“Right…”

The entrance to the shop opened behind them. Before the two could look back to see who it was, a voice spoke, and they instantly knew who it was.

“Hey guys, what’s up?” Dash smiled softly, approaching the arguing pair.

Godson’s ear twitched at the voice, turning around to face his marefriend with open arms. “Hey, Dashie!” He grabbed the mare, pulling her into a hug.

Once the two were done with their show of affection, Dash looked around, noticing all the balloons, streamers, and other general party decorations. “Woah, what’s all this for?”

“Pinkie’s throwing a party for it being a year and three months since my arrival in Equestria.”

“Which arrival? The time where you tried to take over Equestria, or…?” Dash tilted her head.

“My latest arrival.” Godson replied.

“Ahh.” Dash nodded softly. “Right, right.”

“And this party’s gonna be super duper big! We’ll invite everypo—”

“No we won’t.” Godson interrupted.

“Yes we will.” Pinkie countered.

“Pinks, you know how I feel about being in a large crowd.” Godson pointed out. “I just… no.”

“Yes.” Pinkie narrowed her eyes. “End. Of. Discussion.”

”Dammit Pinkie...”

“Now.” Pinkie returned to her original statement. “We’ll invite everypony, there’ll be cake, music, it’ll be the best party ever!”

“You say that about every—”

“Just let her, Godson. There’s nothing you can do to stop her…”

“Ooh! That reminds me, I need to start working on that chocolate cake!”

Before anyone could say anything, Pinkie had already bolted straight to the kitchen.

Godson sighed, not bothering to stop Pinkie anymore. He looked back to his marefriend, who was still in his grasp. “So, Dashie… What are you doing out here so early?”

“Oh. They let me out early, seeing how there wasn’t a whole lot to do.” Dash explained, slowly leaning her head forward towards his. “Which means you get to have me all to yourself just as earlier…”

“I can see that...” Godson chuckled as he met her halfway, leaning his closer to hers, pressing his lips against hers.

The mare in his embrace hummed softly as they kissed. As soon as she felt she had enough, she slowly pulled back, leaving her human wanting a little more. He further proved how much she’d left him wanting more when he slowly leaned forward, sensually kissing her neck.

“G-Godson…” She whispered. “We’re in public…”

“Then how about we go someplace that’s not in public…?” Godson whispered back.

Dash giggled quietly. “I can tell you’re in a good mood…”

“Just a bit…” Godson nodded, slowly went up, until he was able to nibble on her ear. “What do you say, Dash…? Let’s make use of the extra time we have…”

“Mmm~… I’d love to…” Dash stifled a moan. “But don’t you still have work to do…?”

“Pinkie’s letting me off today, since she refuses to let me help do anything related to my own party…”

“Oooh…” Dash cooed. “So that means I have you all to myself?”

“I guess so…” Godson smirked.

“...You know what? I think a little privacy might do us some good…”

Twilight rushed up to Godson’s door, coming to bring urgent news. With a loud knock on the door, she shouted out. “Godson! Something big is happening!”

The doorknob shakes just a bit, spooking the alicorn mare. It twists just a bit, and the door is pulled open, as soon as she spots the familiar face, she immediately began practically shouting her news.

“Godson! It’s weird…! The portal! It’s…” Twilight slowly shifted her focus lower, noticing the clothes he wore, or rather, the lack of clothes he wore. “...uh…”

Godson looked down at his shorts, then back up at the mare in front of him. “...What? Haven’t you seen a shirtless human before?”

“Uh… No… And I don’t think I ever want to after now…” Twilight shook her head. “But, seriously… The portal, Godson!”

“What abou—”

“It’s opened again! All by itself!”

Godson raised an eyebrow. “What do you mean it’s opened by itself...? What portal exactly are we talking about?”

“You know how I opened the portal once to bring you here, and again to bring your dog?”

“Yeah…?”

“Well, it appears that the portals were never fully closed.” Twilight explained. “They seem to have left some remains, and with enough time, they eventually grew enough into their own fully fledged portal.”

“Alright, so we’ll just close it and there won’t be any harm done.” Godson shrugged.

“That’s the problem.” Twilight countered. “The portal’s moving around on it’s own, since it isn’t being held down by someone casting the spell to open it in the first place.”

“So then why are you talking to me?” Godson asked somewhat loudly. “If the portal’s moving around, shouldn’t you be finding it!?”

“Yeah, uh. That’s another thing…”

Godson sighed softly. “You can’t find it, can you?”

Twilight shook her head. “Oh, no. Quite the opposite, really. See, the the portal’s kinda decided it wants to be invisible. So it’s not like I can find it super easily.”

“You’re making it sound like the portal’s a living being, Twilight.” Godson tilted his head to the side.

“At this point, I wouldn’t doubt it if it was…” Twilight commented. “But, anyway, I need to, uh, ‘scan’ a few magic signatures in order to track down the portal.”

“And how exactly do you plan on doing that?”

“Well. I have to scan the magic signatures of any object that came out of the first two portals.” Twilight placed a thinking hoof on her chin. “Maybe only one, though I’m not entirely sure, since this new portal is a mix of both of the remains of the first two.”

“So, basically, you need to ‘scan’ both me and my dog.”

“Yeah, basically.” Twilight nodded sheepishly.

“Mk.” Godson nodded back. “Just give me a second to grab Linda.”

Before Twilight could say anything else, the door was immediately shut, leaving the mare alone in silence.

Meanwhile, inside his home. Godson sighed. “So much for napping with my marefriend...”

He walked over to his bedroom, where aforementioned marefriend was already fast asleep, carrying a content smile. As he slowly walked closer to the bed, the mare slowly reached out her hoof, searching for her human. When she was not able to find him, she let out a soft groan. While he had found the sight to be adorable, he felt bad that he wouldn’t be able to keep her company.

Returning back to the task at hand, he lifted the blankets ever-so-slowly, and grabbed his dog from the bed. Linda huffed a bit over being awoken from her own slumber, then slowly woke up as she was carried out of the room.

On the way out, he grabbed a nearby shirt, and took it with him. Once he was back at the door, he twisted the knob, and opened it once more.

“Oh.” Twilight blinked. “For a second I thought you forgot about me…”

“Nah.” Godson shook his head. “It just took me a minute to get to Linda without waking up Dash.”

“Rainbow Dash is sleeping?”

“Uh…” Godson paused for a moment, then nodded. “Yeah. I was gonna nap with her, but then you showed up with the whole portal issue…”

“Sorry…” Twilight smiled sheepishly. “You don’t have to come with, I just need t—”

“Oh, but I do have to come with.” Godson interrupted. “There’s a portal flying around to my world. I’m half-responsible for it’s existence.”

“Fair enough, I suppose…”

Twilight groaned softly, her horn illuminating as she continued to track down the magic signature of the portal. While the spell was child’s play to use, something about the whole situation seemed to bother her. And the odd feeling she’d get from the spell when indicating how close they were didn’t seem to help make things any better.

Godson, however, kept his hands in his pockets as he followed the alicorn mare. Every now and then he would look away from his path to see his own surroundings, passing by trees, buildings, even other ponies minding their own business. And every time he realized he was going off-track, he shifted his view back at the mare, and ran closer to her before he lost her altogether.

...The less she knew he nearly lost her, the better.

As they continued their path, he soon began to notice her horn had begun to glow brighter and brighter the more they walked. At one point, he wanted to poke it and see what would happen. But with the portal practically running around at the moment, he’d rather not distract her.

And then, he heard a sound. A sound he hadn’t heard in more than a year.

*BA-DING!*

Twilight jumped at the sound, immediately cancelling her tracking spell. She quickly turned around, and looked around for the sound. “What was that!?” She spoke, her eyes nearly bulging from their sockets.

Godson raised an eyebrow, the look on his face as if he knew what that sound was.

“...What?” Twilight also raised an eyebrow. “What is it?”

Godson looked down to his pocket, reaching his hand in, and pulling his phone out of it. He unlocked the device, and he was greeted to a new screen.

“New Skype Message”

The look on the human’s face gave Twilight worry. She could already tell by his sudden widened eyes that something was wrong. She was about to speak up and say something to him, but she was quickly cut off before she could even utter a sound.

“It can’t be…”

Godson slowly tapped on the screen, causing the device to redirect him to the aforementioned app. As if his eyes weren’t already wide enough, Twilight was able to discover a new height of his eyelids’ limits.

Though if she understood what he currently saw, and why it was such a shock to him, she wouldn’t have been so curious.

Shadow: WHERE THE FUCK ARE YOU

Shadow: YOU FUCKING CUBAN

He scrolled down, skipping every new message he received. Passing through until he had reached the bottom, which had their own set of messages marked with today’s date.

Shadow: …?

Shadow: Why is your status online all of a sudden…?

Shadow: Are you back…?

The more Godson began to look at the messages, the more guilt would creep up on him. Not wanting to respond, he shook his head, returned his phone to ‘standby’, and shoved it back into his pocket.

“I-It’s… nothing, Twilight…” Godson spoke softly. “...Don’t worry about it.”

“Are you sure?” Twilight cocked her head to the side. “It looked like you were freaking out just a bit, there.”

“It’s nothing.” Godson deadpanned. “I’m sure.”

“Oh…” Twilight’s ears flopped back. “A-Alright then…” She turned around slowly, and began using her spell once more. “...Now I’m gonna have a hard time trying to find it aga—”

“I might be able to find it…”

Twilight’s ear twitched at the response, she turned her head back in curiousity. “How?”

Godson grabbed his phone, and showed it off to the mare.

“...Your phone?”

“Somehow, I’m getting signal from my world. It’s likely due to the portal able to send and-or receive waves?” Godson attempted to explain. “It’s, uh… both complicated and confusing.”

“Right…” Twilight nodded slowly. “Well, then, take the lead.”

Godson nearly ran as he followed a blind path, relying on his phone’s signal to reach its peak. The more they walked, the more the signal would randomly give up on how much signal it had. Causing the pair to take sharp turns in order to stay on track.

“It’s here.” He spoke suddenly, stopping in his tracks. “This is as high as my phone’s signal can go.”

Twilight raised an eyebrow, casting her tracking spell. “Well, you’re right, the magic signature seems to be stronger around this area… but I can’t seem to get an exact location on it…”

“Right.” Godson nodded, knowing Twilight could finally close the portal for good. But, the more he stood there and watched as Twilight began preparing whatever it was she was planning to do, he thought of something. “So... whatever it is, you said it was similar to the spell you used to get me here...” He checked with the mare, who responded with a nod. “If that’s the case… what are the chances of something… or someone falling through?”

“Uh… I’m not exactly sure. Wherever it is, it’s travelling quite a lot.” Twilight shrugged. “The odds of someone falling through it are increasing and decreasing as it goes…”

“Of course they are…” Godson groaned. “It’d be just my luck if someone I knew fell through it…”

“If so, we may not be able to return them home, regardless if you know them or not.” Twilight commented.

“Yeah, but I’d probably be better working with someone I don’t know, rather than someone I do know.” Godson huffed.

Then, suddenly, he felt something tap on his back.

“Um, excuse me. Do you know where the fuck I am?”

The human went wide-eyed, scared of who exactly who was behind him. Knowing he’d have to do it sooner or later, he turned around slowly. And sighed deeply upon finally seeing who it was.

“Of course it’d be you… Well, better you than Ish, I suppose…”

Author's Note

Whoops! IRL stuff got in the way and decided to make me late in posting this final chapter of Arc 1, my bad!

Also, if you're about to yell at me for not posting any new chapters while still keeping the "incomplete" tag? You may wanna read this, then...

Chapter 2-1: A Shadow's Tale (Pt.1)

*Shadow is now Online.*

Ishtaba: Sup Shadow

Shadow: Hai

Quigzerz: Haif

Shadow: o look a quigzerz

Quigzerz: lol

Shadow: so how are things

Ishtaba: things are same as usual

Quigzerz: Cuban still gone?

Ishtaba: ofc quigz, that fag hasn’t logged on in months. I say he’s dead.

Trey: Ish wtf

Ishtaba: Trey he’s not even answering texts, even storm’s erection spam hasn’t gotten his attention. If I’d gotten that much spam I’d at least tell him to stfu but he hasn’t.

Shadow: I just had the funniest thought.

Ishtaba: And that is?

Quigzerz: That Godson finally played conductor with his waifu?

Shadow: yeah close enough

Ishtaba: lmao he was always trying to prove he wasn’t faking those pictures.

Quigzerz: fck idfk how to use photoshop even, but they look real.

Ishtaba: It’s been months and you STILL don’t believe it’s photoshopped?

Quigzerz: bra have you SEEN them? They honestly look real.

Trey: What pictures?

Ishtaba: Have we not sent trey the pictures?

Quigzerz: fck if i know

Shadow: Not that I know of…

Ishtaba: LMAO TREY’S STILL OUT OF THE LOOP

Trey: Wait what loop?

Quigzerz: Fruit loops, trey. Fruit loops. :3

Ishtaba: Shadow send him a couple of pics.

Trey: Pics of what?
Ishtaba: Okay so do you remember that dare that Godson did for Shadow
Quigzerz: Now i want cereal…
Trey: Not really…

Ishtaba: k basically Shadow dared Godson to take over the world of My Little Pony

Trey: wtf?

Ishtaba: About 5 minutes later he comes back and says he did it, and then sends some pictures.

Quigzerz: Isn’t five minutes enough proof he didn’t photoshop the pics?

Ishtaba: nah man he must’ve had them prior to the dare.

Shadow sent PonyPics.zip

Shadow: photoshopping pics of himself into Equestria before I dared him? Yeah no that doesn’t sound like him.

Ishtaba: Then what do you think happened?

Shadow: idfk

Ishtaba: exactly

Trey: idk, they look photoshopped.

Ishtaba: SEE I TOLD YOU THEY WERE PHOTOSHOPPED

Trey: but

Ishtaba: Sh*t he said ‘but’.

Trey: at the same time they don’t.

Ishtaba: the f*ck trey, you can’t say they’re both photoshopped and not photoshopped.

Trey: idk then

Shadow: gg

Ishtaba: welp I’m the only one who believes they’re photoshopped.

Quigzerz: Has Storm seen them yet?

Ishtaba: idk actually, shadow just sent it to the entire chat so storm could be looking at them even as we speak.

Storm: Yeah they’re photoshopped.

Ishtaba: AYYY I’M NOT THE ONLY ONE WHO SEES IT

Shadow: wat.

Quigzerz: waht

Storm: Thing is they’re photoshopped so good to the point where it DOESN’T look photoshopped.

Ishtaba: lolwhat

Storm: I’m surprised those “experts” that Shadow sent the pics over to didn’t notice it.

Shadow: You’re forgetting I photoshop 24/7 too, storm. I'm one of the "experts" who checked it.

Storm: Then how did you NOT notice these are photoshopped?

Shadow: How DID you notice they were photoshopped in the first place?

Storm: If you want I can send you the evidence.

Shadow: Yes, I would like you to show me where the evidence of it being photoshopped is.

Storm: k just a minute

Ishtaba: PROVE HIM WRONG STORM, DON’T MAKE ME LOOK LIKE AN IDIOT

Quigzerz: Fck if i know, He might be wrong tho

Ishtaba: quigz please don’t jinx it ;n;

Quigzerz: lol

Storm sent evidence.zip

Storm: There you go. There should be a imperfection right around Luna’s right (facing you) wing.

Shadow: Storm. I don’t see any imperfections, you sure it's not just your sh*t monitor dropping pixels?

Ishtaba: SH*T QUIGZ WHY’D YOU JINX IT

Quigzerz: lol

Storm: My monitors aren’t sh*t, maybe it’s just your pixel perfection.

Shadow: yeah no I still don’t see it…

Storm: Ish, you see it, right?

Ishtaba: o.o

Quigzerz: Storm I don't see anything wrong.

Ishtaba: Yeah Storm I don’t see it in this picture.

Storm: Right, f*ck it, call me up whenever we’re done talking about photoshopped pics.

Storm is now AFK.

Trey: Well… that happened…

Ishtaba: GG

Quigzerz: lol

Shadow: k well I’mma brb

Ishtaba: k cya

*Shadow is now Offline.*

Shadow closed the skype window, blocking off any form of communication with anyone who wished to talk to him. He looked back at the ‘evidence’ that Storm had sent him, zooming in and out, trying to see if he could find any imperfections that his friend had claimed to have found so easily.

“I dunno what he’s talking about…” He thought. “There’s nothing here. No imperfections, nothing. It’s completely legit…”

The only problem with his investigation, despite it looking convincingly real, is that it shouldn’t.

“There is no way that he---” He attempted to speak, before being interrupted hears the crashing of pots and pans falling onto the floor as his cat flips shit. “DA HELL YOU DOIN’ CAT?” He yelled, quickly getting up as he races out of his room full speed at the cat, going for an amazing field goal, substituting a ball for the cat in the distance.

Unfortunately, his clumsiness takes over, and he trips on air flying through the air. He closed his eyes as he braced for impact onto the tile floor, instead of hitting the ground, he feels like he is falling for a moment. As soon as he opens his eyes, he smashes his head onto a rock as the rest of him lands on what felt like soft, plush grass.

“...the magic signature seems to be stronger around this area… but I can’t seem to get an exact location on it…” A female voice spoke.

“Right.” A male voice cut in, pausing shortly before speaking up once more. “So... whatever it is, you said it was similar to the spell you used to get me here… If that’s the case… what are the chances of something… or someone falling through?”

“Uh… I’m not exactly sure. Wherever it is, it’s travelling quite a lot.” The first voice replied. “The odds of someone falling through it are increasing and decreasing as it goes…”

Shadow groaned softly as he slowly removed his face from the rock. Rubbing the area he’d get a bruise later, he looked up in front of him, noticing another human not too far away. He slowly began getting up until he stood on his two legs.

“Of course they are…” The second voice groaned, which Shadow was able to identify belonging to the human in front of him. “It’d be just my luck if someone I knew fell through it…”

“If so, we may not be able to return them home, regardless if you know them or not.” The other voice spoke again, though Shadow didn’t care to look who it was, but instead focused on walking up to the man in front of him.

“Yeah, but I’d probably be better working with someone I don’t know, rather than someone I do know.”

Shadow tapped the human on the back. “Um, excuse me. Do you know where the fuck I am?”

The human turned around slowly, bracing himself for the worst case scenario. Then, he narrowed his eyes at the sight of Shadow.

“Of course it’d be you…” He sighed deeply, a sudden rush of guilt seeming to fall onto his face. Shadow immediately identified the man in front of him. “Well, better you than Ish, I suppose…”

“Jorge?” Shadow stepped back in awe. “Is that really…” He quickly looked around him, noticing the world he stood in looked like the edited pic— "So it is real?!"

“Wow…” Godson went wide-eyed. “No one’s called me that in… what… a year and three months, now?”

“Isn’t your name Godson, though?” The voice behind him asked. Shadow looked at the being behind him, realizing exactly who it was.

"Wait... There is no way..." Shadow gawked, "Twilight is here...? So... I really am in Equestria.."

“And here I thought you’d say something along the lines of—”

“Am I dreaming?” Shadow interrupted. “There’s no way this can be real… right?”

“Annnnd you beat me to it…” Godson crossed his arms. “Hate to tell ya, but you’re not dreaming.”

Shadow looked at the alicorn mare behind Godson, and quickly remembered something that might be important. "Oh shi.. Jorge.. Does she um.. Know about the bet..?" He inquired, gulping in fear.

“Hang on a sec…” Twilight interjected. “Didn’t you mention a bet once, Godson?”

“Maybe she wouldn’t have remembered, had you not just mentioned it.” Godson rolled his eyes.

Shadow’s eyes shrank to the size of peanuts. “Well…” He spoke softly. “Can I just say one thing?”

“Shoot.”

“I’LL BE SEEIN' YA AROUND!”

In an instant, Shadow bolted off in the opposite direction, only to trip over the rock he’d previously landed on.

“Yikes…” Godson winced, merely watching him land on the ground caused him a small amount of pain. “That’s… gotta hurt…”

"Someone really needs to remove this damn rock..." Shadow grumbled as he slowly came to stand on his two feet again.

Twilight’s eyes widened as soon as she remembered what Godson had told her a long time ago.

“Is he the one…” She raised an eyebrow. “Who dared you into taking over Equestria?”

“Pretty much.” Godson nodded.

“He’s the idiot that had you taking over Equestria for!?” Twilight shouted.

Godson simply nodded in response. “Oh. And by the way, you owe me 20 bucks, you Canadian retard.”

“Oh fuck no, not with the dollar values as they are now. Knowing you, you want $20 USD, I ain’t giving you just about $40 CAD” Shadow crossed his arms.

“Well you owe me something, then!” Godson grumbled. “Ah well, your money’s useless here in Equestria… I learned that the hard way…” He rolled his eyes.

“I’ll just get your waifu to suck your—”

Godson’s eyes widened, almost enough to compete with Twilight’s eyes. “H-How about we talk about that later…” He interrupted, nudging his head at the alicorn behind him.

“What the heck does waifu mean?” Twilight tilted her head to the side.

“Uh, nothing. It’s just a term that the two of us are familiar with.” Godson shook his head. “It’s nothing that important.”

Shadow looked down, shaking his head with a soft grin on his face.

“Anyway…” Godson attempted to change the subject. “Do you have any idea how you ended up here, Br—”

Shadow slapped Godson’s mouth with his hand. “Say my real name, and I’ll stab you.” He whispered.

“Ugh, fine.” Godson rubbed his now sore mouth. “Username, then?” He whispered back.

“Of course, it sounds cooler.” Shadow nodded.

“Eh, alright then, do you have any idea how you got here, Shadow?” Godson raised an eyebrow.

“Well...” Shadow replied slowly, rubbing the back of his head. “I went for a field goal kick on a cat and tripped on air and fell, but I fell on that damn rock instead of my floor”

“Animal abuse, much?” Godson chuckled.

“Hey!” Shadow pointed a finger at the laughing man in front of him. “In my defence… He knocked over my tacos”

“Oh, Taco abuse and animal abuse.” Godson’s chuckle slowly turned into laughter. “Oh man, that would’ve been great to see…”

“Can somepony explain to me what’s going on?” Twilight cut in, walking up to the two humans. “From what I understand… You’re the idiot…” She poked Shadow’s stomach. “...who dared this idiot?” She pointed at Godson.

“Hey!” Godson snapped back. “Back then, I had my pride to take care of!”

“Pride? You never had pride to begin with, Jorge.” Shadow commented, only to be poked again by Twilight.

“Still waiting on an answer…” Twilight growled, growing more impatient as time went on. She then quickly caught notice of something, and looked at the other human. “And what’s this whole ‘hor-hay’ thing?”

“Huh?” Godson looked at the alicorn mare with a confused expression. “Oh… It’s… uh...”

“Its his real name,” interrupted Shadow, “Did he never tell you what his real name was?”

“Don’t even get me started with you, ‘Shadow’.” Godson retorted.

“Hold it just a second…” Twilight cut in once more. “Your ‘real name’?”

“gg Jorge.” Shadow added in. “You’re fucked now.”

“Don’t think you got off so easily!” Twilight turned to face him.

“Well if that stupid rock wasn’t there, I would’ve been long gone by now!” Shadow countered.

“It’s not even the rock.” Godson closed his eyes as he shook his head. With a deep breath, he sighed. “Twilight, the portal’s moved… hasn’t it…”

Twilight looked up at her horn, which was no longer glowing. “Oh boy…” Twilight groaned. “Check your phone, see if you still have signal.”

Godson grabbed his phone from his pocket, bringing it close to his face. He opened his eyes, looking directly at the signal status.

“Barely.” He monotoned.

“Uh… Can someone explain what’s going on?” Shadow asked dumbfoundedly.

Twilight looked at the confused human. “Oh. Well, basically, there’s a portal connecting both Equestria and your world, and it’s moving around in both worlds. It’s likely while you were running, the portal was lined up perfectly for you to fall right through.”

“What she said.” Godson pointed a thumb at the mare next to him. Quickly shifting his attention back to his phone. “Hm. I wonder if I could make use of this signal and the portal moving around…” He muttered to himself, quickly putting his new random plan into action.

Twilight shrugged at his current actions, despite not having her ‘Jorge’ question answered, she worried more about the idiot that fell through the portal.

“You know you still haven’t answered my question, right?” She inquired.

“What question? You asked a question?” Shadow blinked.

Twilight narrowed her eyes. “Don’t you dare play dumb with me, ‘Shadow’...”

“I’m not... I legitimately forgot already...” Shadow replied with a shrug.

“That quick?” Twilight cocked her head to the side. “Geez…” With a roll of her eyes, she looked back at the Canadian. “Are you the idiot who dared Godson to take over Equestria?”

“Uh… Maybe...” Shadow answered, looking side to side for an easy way to escape the wrath he feared would come.

“That explains everything.” Twilight’s horn glowed, as Shadow braced himself for the worst possible thing to happen.

Luckily for him, the worst thing he imagined would happen, didn’t happen. Instead, he felt a soft tingling on his arm.

“Twilight?” Godson spoke up. “The heck are you doing?”

Suddenly, Twilight’s horn stopped glowing. “There.” She smirked. “You two aren’t worth the extra effort, so I just did something else instead.”

Shadow immediately lifted his sleeve, looking at his arm, with the word “IDIOT” tattooed on it.

“Of course…” Shadow sighed.

“What’s it say?” Godson asked curiously.

Shadow reluctantly showed off the tattoo on his arm, only for Godson to spontaneously burst into laughter at the sight of it.

"It's not funny..." He groaned.

“You're right! It's hilarious!" Godson said through laughs. "Oh geez. That’s great.” His laughter slowly died down. Then quickly realized something. “Wait…” He looked at his own arm, the words “BIGGER IDIOT” tattooed on it.

“DAMMIT TWILIGHT” He shouted. “WHAT DID I DO TO DESER—”

“Jorge.”

“WHAT?” Godson looked at Shadow. “CAN’T YOU SEE I’M YELLING HE—”

“She’s gone, dumbass.”

Godson looked at where Twilight used to be standing, only to find Shadow was right.

“What did yours say?” Shadow asked.

“Screw you, I’m not telling.”

Author's Note

Whew, Arc 2. This one's gonna be quite the story, now.

"A Shadow's Tale" is gonna be a three parter. So, be ready for the next two chapters. :3

Chapter 2-2: A Shadow's Tale (Pt.2)

“...And then, I teleported back here, leaving the two with their tattooes!” Twilight finished her story, falling on the floor as she bursted into total laughter.

Dash laughed softly. “Wow, Twilight. I gotta admit, I thought you’d be too much of an egghead to pull a move like that.” She then thought about how the two humans’ reacted, causing her to laugh a little more. “Is that whole tattoo thing permanent? Cause, uh… That’s gonna be really awkward at times..”

Twilight’s laughter slowly died down. “Nah, it’s temporary.” She got back up on all fours. “Godson’s tattoo lasts for the next few hours, and shadow’s lasts for about… uh… 3 to 4 days, somewhere around there…”

“Why does Shadow’s last longer than Godson’s?”

“Oh, cause he’s the one who dared Godson into taking over Equestria.”

“Really?” Dash raised an eyebrow. “Wow, I wonder what they put into the bet.”

“Something about… twenty dollars?” Twilight shrugged. “I didn’t quite understand that.”

”JORGE YOU FAGGOT GET BACK OVER HERE!”

Dash’s ear twitched. “Did you hear that?”

“Yeah... It was kinda faint though.”

“Not to me…”

”SCREW YOU SHADOW YOU CAN’T LOOK AT MY TATTOO.”

”I SHOWED YOU MINE, YOU DICK!”

”THAT’S WHAT SHE SAID!”

“It sounds like they’re getting closer…” Twilight analysed.

”YOU’LL NEVER CATCH ME ALIVE!”

”THAT CAN BE ARRANGED!”

Dash walked to the door, opening it enough to peek her head through. Only to see her human being chased by another human behind him.

“DASHIE!” Godson shouted at the mare. “HALP ME!”

“YOUR WAIFU AIN’T GONNA SAVE YOU THIS TIME, JORGE!” Shadow shouted, not too far behind.

Dash kept a serious expression throughout their chase. She was tempted to close the door and let the two battle it out on their own, but at the same time, she didn’t want to have an injured human to worry about.

She opened the door all the way, moving out of the way for both the humans to run through.

Once both of the humans are close enough, Twilight casts a spell to freeze the both of them in their tracks; literally.

Dash closed the door, walking up to the two frozen humans. “Alright, listen up, you.” She pointed at the man behind Godson. “I’d let you sort out whatever issues you have over this one here.” She nudged her head in Godson’s direction. “But then I’d have to deal with his constant whining. Seriously, he bruises way too easily.” She added, rolling her eyes. “Fair?”

"Oh, hey Dash, Jorgy-boi over here make you his waifu yet?" Shadow replied with a giddy grin.

“You are so lucky you’re frozen…” Godson grumbled, only to get softly slapped in the back of the head by Dash’s wing.

“Shut up.” Dash commanded. She turned her focus back to Shadow. “What do you mean ‘make me his waifu’? What the hay is a ‘waifu’?”

“Nevermind…” Shadow rolled his eyes. “Fine, I’ll leave him alone."

“Good.” Dash nodded. “Nice use of that spell, Twilight. I wasn’t even expecting that.”

“Pretty basic spell, actually.” Twilight smiled. “Should I unfreeze them?”

“Probably should.” Dash replied. “Cause if we don’t, Godson will just start throwing a temper tantrum.”

“I don’t throw temper tantrums!” Godson retorted as the spell was slowly removed from him.

“I’m messing with you, geez.” Dash laughed softly. “After all this time we’ve been dating, you still don’t know when I’m messing around, huh?”

“No…”

“I can see that.” Dash giggled. “Now, come here, you ‘bigger idiot’.” She stood up on her rear legs, reaching her forelegs out for a hug. He obeyed, walking to her until he was close enough for her to pull him close to her.

“That’s what your tattoo said!?” Shadow stifled a laugh. “Ha! Yours is worse than mine!”

“Except yours lasts longer.” Dash peeked her head above Godson’s shoulder with a smirk, then softly closed her eyes as she rested her head on it.

“Oh, they’re temporary…” Godson thought aloud.

“Mhm.” Dash hummed. “Yours lasts for the next few hours... “

“Wait, why does mine last longer?” Shadow asked.

“Two reasons.” Twilight answered. “One, he wasn’t the one who came up with the dare. Two, I knew Dash was gonna complain about him having it for the next few days.”

“Do you know how awkward it would be seeing him with that ‘bigger idiot’ tattoo while w—”

“Anyways…” Twilight interrupted. “I’m sure you must have a lot of questions… so—”

“How the fuck do I get home?”

Twilight jerked her head back at the human’s sudden vulgarity. “Yeah… about that…”

”OW!”

”THAT’S WHAT YOU GET FOR LEAVING ME ALONE IN BED!”

“I’m stuck here, aren’t I?”

Twilight simply nodded.

“Of-fucking-course I am.” Shadow rolled his eyes. “And I was starting to think Jorge went MIA just because he didn’t want to go back.”

“Now that you mention that whole ‘horhay’ thing…” Twilight brought a hoof to her chin. “You said that was Godson’s real name?”

“I was getting ready to say something about that.” Dash jumped in on their conversation. She pulled back softly from her human’s embrace. “What’s that all about?”

“Now you’re fucked, Jorge.” Shadow smirked evilly. “gg.”

Godson let go of the mare, and turned around to face the man behind him. “So when I try to call you by your real name, you threaten to stab me. But when you say my real name, it’s perfectly fine?”

“Yep.” Shadow nodded.

“Screw you, that’s not fair at all.” Godson grumbled.

“Never said it was fair, now did I?” Shadow countered.

“Both of you, shut up and stop trying to dodge the question!” Twilight interjected.

“Okay! Fine! Yes, ‘Jorge’ is my real name!” Godson finally admitted. “Happy now?”

“So why would you lie to us about your name?” Twilight asked.

“Because, one, ‘Godson’ sounded cooler at the time.” Godson pointed a finger at the sky. “Two.” Another finger was raised. “I went with that name in case crap didn’t end well, no one would be able to ask around for ‘Godson’.” He placed a hand on the back of his neck. “I uh… kinda regret doing so in the long run…”

“Why’s that?” Dash jumped in.

Godson looked at her. “Do you know how awkward it is hearing you shout ‘Godson’ every time we’r—”

“Jorge.” Shadow interrupted. “We don’t need to know about your personal life with your waifu...”

Dash blinked. “Is he talking about me?”

“Yeah. He’s talking about you.” Godson confirmed.

“So ‘waifu’ means marefriend?” Twilight queried.

“Yeah, sure, why not?” Shadow replied.

“So, should I call you ‘Jorge’, then?” Dash cocked her head to the side.

“If you want?” Godson shrugged. “If you’re more comfortable calling me ‘Godson’, then go ahead.”

“How about I call you ‘idiot’, and we’re good?” Dash teased.

“Please don’t.” Godson frowned.

“Relax. I won’t...” Dash softly nudged his arm. “...Jorge.” She raised an eyebrow. “Eh… Kinda sounds better than ‘Godson’, if you ask me…”

“Wait, that’s it?” Shadow gawked. “No one’s pissed at him for lying!?”

“Why do you think he has that tattoo on his arm?” Twilight answered.

“Really? Just a ‘bigger idiot’ tattoo?” Shadow sighed. “Pathetic…”

“What do you expect us to do? Send him to tartarus just for lying?” Dash narrowed her eyes. “I’m not gonna send my boyfriend away just for lying about a dumb name. What about you, Shadow?”

“Shit...” Shadow grumbled.

“Why don’t you use your real name, anyway?” Godson inquired. “At least I had a reason the first time I came here.”

“Shadow sounds more badass.” Shadow crossed his arms.

“Whatever.” ~~Godso~~ Jorge rolled his eyes. “Shouldn’t we be hunting down that portal? Y’know, in case anyone else falls through?”

“Oh, please…” Twilight scoffed. “The chances of someone else falling through ar—”

“Still increasing and decreasing, meaning it’s a completely random chance of someone else falling through.” ~~God~~ Jorge interrupted. “And if you think Shadow is annoying…”

”Hey!”

“...then you won’t want to meet any of my other friends…” ~~G~~ Jorge concluded. “...Well, except Trey… He’s fine.”

“Eh. I can’t really imagine Trey here.” Shadow added. “Could you imagine if Ish were here, though?”

“I swear, if he falls through…” Jorge groaned, softly facepalming at the thought.

“Alright, I’ll send a letter over to Celestia to send out royal guards to help look out.” Twilight stated. “For all we know, the portal’s probably not even in Ponyville anymore.”

“What happens when the portal’s found, then?” Jorge asked curiously.

“I’ll fly there as fast as I can, and do everything I can to close the portal. It’s mostly just magic residue, so I should be able to control it...” Twilight answered.

“Should be able to control it…?” Shadow asked, sounding slightly worried.

“Well… yeah.” Twilight hesitantly nodded. “It’s magic residue from a spell I casted. Therefore, I should be able to control it.”

“And if you can’t…?” Shadow asked once more.

“Then… uh…” Twilight smiled sheepishly.

“Nice…” Shadow chuckled. “Let’s hope Twilight doesn’t screw the fuck up and doom us all.”

Jorge widened his eyes. “Woah, uh…”

Twilight cleared her throat. “I’m not a princess for nothing, y’know.”

”Oh good she passed it off like nothing…”

“You’re a princess, eh?” Shadow lifted an eyebrow. “Princess of what, exactly?”

“Er… Uh…”

“I rest my case.” Shadow concluded, giving a knowing smirk.

“The hell, Shadow?” Jorge cut in. “Why do you give every new person you meet such a hard time?” Suddenly, he had an evil idea. “What, are you trying to hint out the obvious?” He grew an evil smirk as he finished his sentence.

“What’s obvious...?” Shadow’s pupils shrunk, fearing of what his friend’s evil smirk would lead to.

“You like Twilight, don’t ya?” Jorge concluded, putting his evil plan into action.

“Uh… What are you doing?” Dash whispered in his ear.

“Just follow my lead.” Jorge whispered back.

“Jorge, are you high on some kind of pony drug or something?” Shadow’s pupils returned to normal.

“Oh, come on.” Jorge scoffed. “It’s obvious you have a thing for Twilight.”

“No… I don’t…” Shadow shook his head. “Seriously, you’re high, aren’t you?”

“Yeah, Shadow!” Dash smirked as well. “I can see it from a mile away.”

"Dash, did Jorge share his drugs with you? Cause you seem high, too." Shadow retorted.

“I can’t see it.” Twilight bluntly stated.

“Have you dated anyone, Twilight?” Jorge queried.

“No…” Twilight shook her head. “But that doesn’t me—”

“Then of course you can’t see it!” Dash interrupted. “Look at me and Jorge, we’ve been dating for almost a year.”

“Pretty sure we’ve picked up a few things by experience.” Jorge added.

Shadow finally figured where they were going with this, in an instant, his pupils shrunk once more, down to the size of acorns. “I don’t thi—”

“Eh, he doesn’t really seem to be my type.” Twilight interrupted. “Look at him, he’s a bigger idiot than Jorge.”

“I’d say something against that. But I’ve given up on trying to prove otherwise.” Jorge sighed.

“Relax, I know you’re not an idiot…” Dash said in a reassuring tone, wrapping a wing around him.

“Thanks…” Jorge smiled softly at the mare’s actions.

“No problem… idiot.” Dash joked.

“Me?” Shadow brought his hands to his chest. “A bigger idiot than Jorge?” He pointed at the aforementioned human. “Oh hell no. I am not a bigger idiot than Jorge!”

“Well, so far, you’ve been doing a bad job at showing it.” Dash snickered.

“What can I do to prove it, then?” Shadow brought his hands to his hips. “Whatever it is, I can do it.”

“I’m… gonna go write that letter…” Twilight blinked, slowly walking away as she tried to escape from this conversation.

Everyone else, however, didn’t bother to say anything, they continued in their useless debate.

“You know you’re stuck here, right?” Jorge asked to verify. “Where exactly do you plan on living?”

“Uh… I don’t fucking know…” Shadow retorted.

“I hear Applejack wouldn’t mind the extra help.” Dash commented.

“I’d prefer a cardboard box, thank you.” Shadow crossed his arms.

“What’s the matter? Don’t feel like fu—” Jorge caught himself. “Crap, I almost did it again…” He shook his head, returning back to the topic. “Don’t feel like bucking trees?”

“Whatever that is… No, just give me a fucking cardboard box, and we’re good.” Shadow grumbled.

“What about Pinkie Pie?” Jorge threw the idea out. “I bunked with her until I got on my feet?”

“Did you say something about how she would probably call you ‘Goddy’ before you went MIA?” Shadow questioned. “I don’t want some weird-ass girly nickname.”

“How would one make a girly nickname out of ‘Shadow’?” Jorge inquired. “It’s nearly impossible to come up with something like—”

“Jorge, this is Pinkie we are talking about..” Shadow countered. “For all we know, she could be listening in on us, right now.”

“How do you know about...oh, that’s right, I forgot that your world had us as a cartoon, entertainment, thing…” Dash groaned. “I was fine not remembering that, by the way…”

“Okay, then what about bunking at my place?” Jorge asked. “There’s plenty of ro—”

“Still waiting on that cardboard box.”

“If it’s that big of a problem, I have a guest bedroom.” Twilight walked back, rolling her eyes. “You could sleep there. Unless you’d still prefer that cardboard box…”

Shadow weighed the two options. Living in a cardboard box, which he’d probably burn later on in the long run, or sleep in Twilight’s guest room. Both seemed like pretty bad choices, regardless, but they were better than bunking with Jorge or Pinkie.

Eventually, he came to a decision. “Yeah. I guess I’ll sleep there…”

"Oooh. You’d like that, wouldn’t you?" Dash smirked.

Shadow glared at the mare. “So this was what you two were planning…”

Twilight looked at the smirking couple, then back at Shadow. “You do realize you’d need to help around, right?”

“Oh, so, chores?” Shadow quipped.

“If by chores, you mean besides helping around with cleaning?” Twilight tilted her head. “Yeah, sure.”

“Then… help with what, exactly?” Shadow worriedly asked.

“Oh, basically Spike’s job as my assistant every now and then.” Twilight shrugged. “I know he always wants to help and all, but, he needs a break every now and then.” She mused. “Besides, if you want to prove you’re not such an idiot, then helping me out as my assistant should be enough.”

“Really?” Shadow queried. “That doesn’t sound too bad.”

Suddenly, the sound of burping was heard, and shortly after, Spike walked into the room.

“Y’know, one of these days you’ll be sending a letter to Celestia. What if I’m not around to help send it?” Spike muttered, handing Twilight a letter. “Can Shadow breathe fire? I don’t think so…”

“Relax. He’s only doing the jobs that I wouldn’t want to bother you with.” Twilight sighed. “It’s not like he’s completely taking over.”

“It’s Owlicious all over again…” Spike groaned, returning to where he originally was.

Twilight rolled her eyes. She used her magic to levitate the letter, which opened entirely on it’s own. “Well, that was fast…”

“What is it?” Jorge inquired.

Twilight looked up from her letter. “It’s Celestia. They found the portal.”

“That’s great!” Jorge cheered. “What are you waiting for, go close it! I’ll stay here with Shadow. Cause, I don’t feel like going anywhere... ”

“Alright…” Twilight closed her eyes, teleporting the letter somewhere else. She then looked at Shadow. “While I’m gone, Shadow…” Her horn illuminated once more, and with a flash of light, a piece of paper appeared in front of him. “Here’s some stuff for you to do.”

“Wait, what?” Shadow grabbed the list.

“And I expect all this to be done before I get back.”

“WHAT!?” Shadow shouted. “HOW THE FUCK DOES THIS HELP ME PROVE I’M NOT AN IDIOT!?”

“It doesn’t.” Twilight deadpanned. “It’s just that I’ve been making Spike do chores for a while now. You wanna live here? Then it’s your turn.”

Shadow looked at her, then back at the list. “Fuck…”

“It’s not that bad.” Twilight shook her head. “They’re all really simple chores. You could get them done in no time at all.”

“Ugh…”

“Anyway, I better hurry up and get to that portal before someone else falls through.” Twilight noted, making her way out the door. “I’ll send status reports whenever something major happens!”

“‘Kay.” Jorge nodded, waiting for the door to close shut.

Once it did, he walked up to Shadow, who was still complaining about the list.

“Lemme see that friggin list.” He snatched the piece of paper from Shadow’s hand. “Feed Owlicious, clean the dishes, pick up the books lying around…” He read. “These are all basic chores, why are you complaining so much?”

“They all require effort…” Shadow groaned.

Jorge patted him on the back. “At least you’re living under Twilight’s roof. I actually had to work until I got on my feet. Like, bake cakes and clean all kinds of messes.”

“How’d that turn out?” Shadow raised an eyebrow.

“These chores on your list? They’re child’s play compared to what I do around my house.”

“How so?”

“Living with Dash has it’s pros and cons. The pros outweigh the cons by a ton, but, let’s just say one of the cons is basically needing to have a constant supply of bleach…”

Author's Note

Part Two of Three.

Chapter 2-3: A Shadow's Tale (Pt.3)

“Done.” Shadow fell back on a nearby couch, sighing at all the work he had done. “Why the hell didn’t you tell me Twilight had a fuckin’ owl, Jorge?”

“Was the name ‘Owlicious’ not obvious enough?” Jorge scoffed, walking up to the bookshelf. He placed a hand on his chin, inspecting through the list of books to see what he should grab.

“You’ve really gotten used to working, huh?” Shadow raised an eyebrow. “Last time I talked to you, you were the laziest person I knew.”

“You try going nearly a year without computers and games.” Jorge countered. “...Oh wait, you’re stuck here anyway…” He shook his head. “Yeah. At least they have TV in this world.”

“Seriously?” Shadow queried. “They don’t have computers, but they have fucking television? If that’s the case, then… where does Twilight keep the TV in this house?”

“HA!” Jorge instinctively shouted. “Do you even know who you’re living with?”

“Twilight’s always too focused on her books and magic.” Dash rolled her eyes at her human’s attitude towards his friend.

“The day Twilight gets a TV is the day I’ll eat my shoe.” Jorge boasted.

“That can be arranged.” Shadow smirked.

“Ooh, do I smell another bet coming along?” Dash smirked along with him.

“Considering he still owes me from the first bet…” Jorge turned around. “Why the heck not?”

“If I get Twilight to get a TV…” Shadow began. “Not only do you gotta eat your own shoe, but I won’t have to pay you anything from the first bet.”

“And if I win. You’ll owe double.” Jorge smiled evilly.

“That’s it?” Dash cut in. “Getting Twilight to get a TV. Pathetic.”

“Then what do you have in mind?” The two humans asked in unison.

“Instead of trying to get Twilight to get a TV…” Dash grew her own evil grin. “Shadow has to try to get Twilight out on a date.”

“Wat.” Shadow blinked. “First you get me living at Twilight’s, now you want me to date her?”

“Yeah. Even I didn’t expect that, Dashie.” Jorge added.

“What’s the matter? It’s only one date.” Dash’s evil grin grew more as she continued. “How hard could it possibly be?”

“Very hard, in case you didn’t notice, she’s not exactly happy with me daring Jorgy-Boi over here to try and take over Equestria. Even though… to be honest... I didn’t think he could, nor that this place even existed.”

“If it’s as hard as you say, then what makes you think you can get Twilight to buy a TV?” Dash questioned.

“Buying a TV seems easier to do, in my opinion.” Jorge replied.

“But don’t you want to win the bet?” Dash queried.

“Of cour—”

“Then, c’mon, Jorge. Let your good ol’ pal Shadow speak for himself.” Dash chided. “What do you say, Shadow? Either get Twilight out on a date, or you’ll still owe him.”

“I hate letting Jorge win, so... Fuck it. Fine, I’ll do the dare your way Dash.” Shadow groaned, knowing he was gonna be in for possibly the hardest challenge of his life.

“Deal.” Dash lifted a hoof, which Shadow grabbed a hold of. Hand/hoofshakes aside, the bet was made, and there was no turning back.

“I’m going to regret this…” Shadow thought aloud.

“Aw, c’mon!” Dash said in a reassuring tone. “Look at it this way: If you win, Jorge has to eat his shoe, and you won’t owe him anything. Doesn’t that sound like a good deal?”

“Not really.” Shadow shook his head. “How can I be sure Jorge will actually eat his shoe?”

“Do you know who you’re talking to?” Dash smirked once more. “I’ll make sure he eats his shoe if he loses.”

“You sure you want someone who ate their shoe eatin—”

Dash smacked his mouth. “Finish that sentence, and the bet’s off.”

“Then what are you gonna do when he eats his sho—”

“I’ll make him take a gallon of mouthwash.” Dash rolled her eyes.

“Wait, what?” Jorge went wide-eyed.

Dash looked at the wide-eyed human. “What, did you actually think you were gonna bring that shoe-infested mouth anywhere near me?” She scoffed. “You're crazy."

“That’s if I lose, Rainbow!” Jorge pointed out. “Do you really think Shadow’s gonna actually be able to get Twilight on a date?”

“If I can be fine dating you. Then I’m pretty sure Shadow has some chance of getting at least one date with Twilight.” Dash countered.

"Oooooh, torched!" Shadow snickered.

Jorge glared at him, resisting the urge to snap back. He looked back at his marefriend. “But this is Twilight we’re talking about!” His vision snapped back to Shadow, then returned to Dash. “And this is Shadow we’re talking about!”

“Hey!” Shadow retorted. “What the hell is that supposed to mean?”

"I’m just saying Twilight’s too much of a bookworm to even think about dating.” Jorge answered. “Even more so now that she thinks of you as an idiot.”

Dash poked his arm. “Except you got the ‘bigger idiot’ tattoo.”

“My point still stands.” Jorge crossed his arms.

"So? Even with you being with Dash, I've still gotten more action than you!" Shadow boasted, smirking wildly as he made his statement. "I have hidden charm that can make anyone fall for me."

“Heh…” Dash chuckled. “I’m seriously going to doubt you’ve gotten more action.”

“Why’s that?” Shadow raised an eyebrow.

“No reason…” Dash inconspicuously looked around. “Just… gonna doubt it… That’s all…”

Shadow’s eyes widened. “Exactly how many times did yo—Nevermind, I don’t wanna know…”

“Yeah… you really don’t…” Jorge shook his head. “Anyways, I’mma head out. I have to do some shopping... "

Shadow smirked as something popped into his head. “Out of blea—”

“Shuddap!” Jorge covered his ears, running towards the door. Causing his friend to laugh at his attempts to flee.

"Good luck with the dare, Shadow!" Dash giggled, following her human out the door. “And FYI, we have plenty of bleach!”

The door slammed shut, leaving Shadow alone to himself.

Taking a deep breath, he sighed. "Well, I did all the things Twilight asked me to do... Now what?" He looked around, scanning his surroundings for something to keep him occupied. He got up from the couch, and walked to the bookshelves.

He surveyed through the vast amount of books, finding only one book to draw his attention.

“Fifty Shades of Hay, huh?” He thought aloud. “This better not be a ripoff of Shades of Grey…”

He opened the book, flipping through pages as he skimmed through the words. “Yep. It’s the same.” With a soft clap, the book was slammed shut, and returned to its home.

By the corner of his eye, he saw something purple walking by. He jerked his head to identify what the ‘something’ was.

“Oh… It’s you.” Shadow sighed a breath of relief. “For a second, I thought you were a midget barney, or something.”

Spike stopped in his tracks, looking back at him. “...What’s a ‘barney’?”

“...Nevermind.” Shadow muttered. “What’re you up to?”

“Nothing really, just gonna grab a snack.” Spike shrugged. “Seeing how you finished all the chores, I need something to do…”

“I know that feel.” Shadow admitted. “So… you’re not all pissed off because I took your job?”

“I was, but then I realized how much free time I’d have if you took over.” Spike replied. “So… Keep up the good work.” He raised his claw, doing the dragon equivalent of a thumbs up.

As Spike walked off to the kitchen, Shadow simply shrugged, and returned to what he was originally doing. He continued looking through all the books, coming across the likes of “The History of the Elements of Harmony”, “A Secret Life of Trees”, “1001 Ponies”, "Trees of the Eclipse", and many other books with large variety.

But then, he came across a rather large and odd book. As he pulled it from the shelf, he noticed it was seeming to be a magic spell book, along with a purple bookmark sticking out.

Being the curious man he is, he opened the book, stopping at where the bookmark was left. There were equations, formulas, and other things that were supposed to lead to something that caught his attention.

A transformation spell.

He looked at the equations, some were filled, others were either incomplete or simply needed the answer to complete it.

“DON’T TOUCH THAT!”

Shadow jumped at the sudden shouting. The book quickly escaped from his grasp, he quickly moved his hands in an attempt to catch it, only to make the book bounce around his desperate attempt to keep the book from falling. Soon enough, he was able to get a steady grasp of the book, huffing and puffing as he calmed down from the heat of the moment.

“The hell, Spike?” Shadow groaned.

“That’s Twilight’s spellbook! What are you doing with it?“

“Looking at it…” Shadow raised an eyebrow. “I can’t look at the book?”

“No…” Spike scratched the back of his head. “Twilight doesn’t let anypony touch her spellbook.”

“Why not?” Shadow tilted his head.

“I’m not sure.” Spike shrugged. “She just doesn’t like anypony touching it. You can even ask Go—… Jorge.”

“Well, Twilight’s not here, is she?”

“I guess not…”

“So what she doesn’t know won’t kill her, right?”

“I guess…”

“‘Kay then.” Shadow smiled at his win. He looked back at down at the unfinished page, and pointed at it. “By the way, what’s this all about?”

Spike got a hold of the book, investigating the page. “Oh. This is the transformation spell. She’s been working on this one for ages, she just hasn’t been able to figure out those last few..”

“Equations?”

“Yeah...”

“These are really simple, I know how to do all of them.” Shadow confidently beamed. “Maybe I could surprise her by finishing them before she gets back.”

“Really?” Spike gawked. “That’s great! Not even Jorge could figure it out!”

Shadow scoffed. “Jorge is an idiot. I on the other hand, am not.”

Spike walked to a nearby book stand, placing the spellbook down on it.

“Alright then. Let’s see what you can do.”

“What are we shopping for, anyways?” Dash curiously asked.

“Food, supplies,” Jorge listed. “Uh… what else…”

“Bleach?” Dash snickered.

“Nah.” Jorge shook his head. “We still have plenty of that.”

“Hm, alright.” Dash nodded, suddenly having an idea to change the subject. “So… What do you think will happen to Shadow?”

“What do you mean?”

“Like… Do you think he’ll be okay being in Equestria?” Dash raised an eyebrow.

Jorge stayed silent, thinking about his marefriend’s quesion. She looked at him with a worried expression, showing just how bad she felt for the new displaced human.

He took a deep breath, and sighed. “I’m pretty sure he’ll be fine...”

“You think so?” Dash queried.

“Yeah…” Jorge replied. “It might take him some time… but I think he’ll get used to living here…” He chuckled at a new thought. “I know I did…”

Dash looked at him. “What’cha thinkin’ about?”

“Heh…” Jorge huffed. “I was just thinking what would happen if someone else I knew would’ve fallen through instead of Shadow.”

“Why’s that?”

“I dunno, like, Shadow was almost fine being stuck here.” Jorge shrugged. “But, had it been someone else, I could imagine a lot of screaming.”

“More screaming than Shadow chasing you down?” Dash giggled as she recalled that moment.

“Three times more screaming.” Jorge nodded. “Seriously, if it was someone like Ishtaba, crap would’ve hit the fan.”

“What kind of name is ‘Ishtaba’?” Dash tilted her head.

“The same kind of name as ‘Godson’ and ‘Shadow’.” Jorge replied. “They’re just nicknames we know each other by.”

“Ah.” Dash understood. “So Godson was still your name, just not your actual name. I get it.”

“Mhm.” Jorge hummed. “On the bright side, at least I’m not the only human in Equestria anymore.”

“Were you starting to get lonely?” Dash teased. “You could’ve just came to me…” She got closer to him. “I would’ve made sure you wouldn’t get lonely…”

“Dashie, we’re in public.” Jorge reminded her. “And second, I wasn’t getting lonely, per se. Just, rather, unrelatable. Seeing how there are so many differences between my world and yours.” He scratched the back of his neck. “I mean… you have Fluttershy to relate to, since you’re both pegasi. Me? I mean, I’ve told you a lot, but being told something isn’t the same as actually being a part of it… I’m probably doing a bad job at explaining this…” He sighed. “But, you get the point.”

Dash nodded. “Yeah. I get it.”

“Yeah…” He nodded back. “So, it’s nice to be able to relate with someone who knows most of the things I’m familiar with.”

“Even though you don’t have most of that stuff?”

“Yeah, but, they were still part of my life, they had some impact.”

Dash nodded in agreement, before quickly thinking of something. “What would’ve happened if anyone hadn’t fell through the portal?”

“Well, I probably would’ve just ignored it, try to relate with you guys. Adjust more into living in Equestria.”

“And what about Twilight’s transformation spell?” Dash cocked her head to the side.

“Well… while it probably is the one thing that would change me from ‘the only human in Equestria’ to just another ordinary citizen of Equestria… I like my hands.” Jorge explained. “I’ve had them my entire life. And I’ve been using them in ways you seem to enjoy.”

Dash cleared her throat. “Shut uuuuuup…”

“I’m not wrong, am I?” Jorge inquired.

Dash remained silent, not wanting to admit defeat. Though deep down, she knew he was right.

“Am I?”

“No…” She groaned.

“Exactly.”

“But I wouldn’t mind you being a stallion.” Dash countered. “Heck, if you ended up being a pegasus. We could go flying around together!” She beamed.

“I don’t know.” Jorge shook his head. “There’s still a lot for me to think about and that spell. It’s not even finished, so we can’t just start talking about it as if it’s gonna be finished any time soon.”

“I guess…” Dash agreed.

“Jorge!”

Dash’s ear twitched at the sudden voice, while Jorge merely just stopped in his tracks. They both turned their heads, finding Shadow running up to the couple.

“What’s going on?” Jorge asked.

“Twilight just sent a letter.” He panted, stopping his sentence there. He bent over, placing his hands on his knees, attempting to collect more oxygen.

“And?”

Shadow pointed a finger up, signaling him to wait. After a few deep breaths, he stood back up. “The letter came with both good news and bad news. Which do you want to hear first?”

“Tell us the good news, first.” Dash cut in.

“Figured you would…” Shadow muttered to himself, then quickly snapped back to normal. “Right, well. Good news is, Twilight closed the portal…”

“And the bad news?” Dash and Jorge asked in unison.

“Right before she could close it… something else came through, she didn't mention what though...”

Jorge and Dash looked at each other, almost worried at the thought of another human running around Equestria. And according from what he’s told her, the results won’t end up as calm as Shadow’s.

“And uh… She’s on her way right now.” Shadow added. “She’s on a train that’ll be here in a couple of hours…”

“Whelp. Time to play the waiting game.” Jorge randomly spoke, walking away with the shopping cart.

“Where the hell are you going?”

“To buy more bleach!”

“TOO MUCH INFORMATION, DAMMIT!”

“THAT’S WHAT YOU GET FOR ASKING DUMB QUESTIONS!”

Jorge, Dash, and Shadow arrived at the train station. They speculated on what could’ve possibly had fallen through the portal, though none of them could agree on exactly what was the most likely. With the odds of anything or anyone falling through increasing and decreasing as long as the portal was moving around, they literally had nothing to go on.

"Hey uh, Dash, this has been bugging me for a while…” Shadow spoke up. “Seeing as Twilight is a er... Princess... Shouldn't she have a castle…?"

“Y’know… I’m not entirely sure how that works…” Dash placed a hoof on her chin. “I mean, Celestia and Luna live in Canterlot… Cadence lives in the Crystal Kingdom… Those are all ‘high places’.”

“So what you’re saying is…” Shadow began. “Ponyville’s not ‘high’ enough for Twilight to get a castle in?”

“Yeah, pretty much…”

Suddenly, they could hear the loud “choo-choo” sounds of the train’s whistle as it got closer. Jorge simply pointed at it while calling it out.

As the train finally made its stop, the trio could hear the speakers turning on.

“We’ve reached our destination.”

The doors slowly open, though coincidentally, the door that was directly in front of the trio was the door that opened to reveal Twilight.

She stepped out of the train, and quickly pointed a wing behind her, as just the mere tip poked into the train. She pulled her wing back to her body, and smiled.

“So.” She spoke. “Did you guys get my letter?”

“Yeah.” Jorge answered. “According to it, you closed the portal?”

“Yep!” Twilight’s smile grew wider. “It actually wasn’t too hard. I guess it kinda softened up after having all that extra time to be open.”

“You weren’t gone very long, either.” Shadow noted. “Why did you come back by train?”

“Cause there was no way I was gonna carry what came out back home.” Twilight sighed.

“Speaking of which…” Dash cut in. “What the heck came through before the portal closed!? The suspense is killing me!”

Twilight turned her head back. “Okay, you can come out, now!”

Jorge and Shadow worriedly looked at each other, then looked back at the train.

“This isn’t gonna end well… is it?” Shadow asked, while he was worried of what exactly would come through that door. He was also decently calm about it.

Jorge, on the other hand, was having the completely opposite reaction.

He closed his eyes, looked up at the sky, and even went as far as putting his hands together, completing his praying stance. “Please don’t be Ish.” He chanted. “Please don’t be Ish. Please don’t be Ish. PLEASE DON’T BE—”

“AYY JORGE! THE FUCK AM I HEARING ABOUT NOT WANTING ME HERE!?”

Author's Note

Annnnnd that's the end of the three parter.

We now return to your regularly scheduled program.

...Or do we?

Chapter 2-4: Everything is fine...ish (Pt.1)

Ishtaba: Ayy so while Shadow’s gone doing who knows what.

Trey: Hm?

Ishtaba: I’ll probably play Dota when I get back. Quigz wanna come with?

Quigzerz: lol sure

Ishtaba: kk

*Godson is now Online.*

Ishtaba: WHAT

Godson: GUYS

Ishtaba: WHAT

Godson: I BARELY HAVE SIGNAL OUT HERE

Ishtaba: YOU’RE SUPPOSED TO BE DEAD

Godson: WELL I’M NOT, DEAL WITH IT.

Ishtaba: WHERE THE F*CK HAVE YOU BEEN

Godson: YOU WOULDN’T BELIEVE ME IF I TOLD YOU

Ishtaba: F*CK THE TRUTH

Godson: I DON’T HAVE MUCH TIME TO TALK.

Quigzerz: Damn i had 20$ on him being dead.

Trey: caps much?

*Godson is now Offline.*

*Godson is now Online.*

Godson: Guys seriously I don’t have much time to talk.

*Godson is now Offline.*

*Godson is now Online.*

Trey: gg Godson’s internet

Ishtaba: Alright fine what’s going on

Godson: If anyone feels anything weird near you, or if you have a dog barking at the air. DON’T INVESTIGATE IT.

Quigzerz: Fck you ima go investigate it, id wanna touch it, sounds like it would feel weird.

Trey: wtf?

Ishtaba: df you talking about

Godson: And if you DO decide to investigate… Then bring some sticky notes cause I want some.

Ishtaba: lol what

Godson: Yeah man, sticky notes aren’t easy to just come across where I am.

Ishtaba: Can’t you just buy some at the store?

Godson: None of the stores here have sticky notes. I don’t even think it exists here.

Quigzerz: I always carry sticky notes on me.

Trey: Where are you? Antarctica?

Godson: yeah sure whatever

Ishtaba: You’re telling me penguins don’t sell sticky notes?

Quigzerz: Bring me a penguin. plz.

Godson: That doesn’t matter. What matters is that you be very careful if you start investigating.

*Godson is now Offline.*

*Godson is now Online.*

Godson: And if you do fall through. Then… well...

Ishtaba: ?

*Godson is now Offline.*

Ishtaba: Wait, “well” what? GODSON WHO SAID YOU CAN F*CKING LEAVE

Quigzerz: lol fck, thats the last of that then.

Ishtaba: Screw it, I’m almost home, lemme just pull out my keys now so I don’t have to fiddle for them later.

Ish searched the front pocket of his backpack, trying to find his house keys. Sadly, they were hidden underneath all his random assortments of junk he keeps in his bag. Also within his bag lied a Pre-Calc textbook, a few packs of Post-Its, and other school supplies.

“God damnit, why the fuck do I keep so much useless shit in here?” He cursed as he stabbed his palm on a recently sharpened pencil. “Whatever, at least I did this shit now rather than at my door…”

As he pulled out his keys, Ish’s clumsiness got the better of him. He dropped them, but managed to see where they had fallen on the ground. However, for some reason, the lanyard they were on was half missing and the keys were slowly moving towards where the lanyard began to disappear.

“What the hell, am I going crazy?” Ish thought aloud as he went to pick up his keys. “Wait, the fuck? Why can't I pull this shit out?”

Ish starts moving closer, and tries to get a better grip on his lanyard; but, to his surprise, the lanyard disappeared from sight, and his keys soon followed suit. Almost as if they were sucked into the ground.

“Shit, I needed that. No one’s home, and I sure as hell am not sitting outside for a few hours...”

Of all the things Ishtaba could’ve done, he decided to literally poke the ground to search for where his keys went.

“God, I look like an idiot... Good thing all of my friends live on the opposite side of town…”

And at that moment, he noticed that his left hand felt absolutely nothing as he touched part of the ground. As if he was in contact with something ethereal. He tried to move his hand around to confirm his suspicions, but alas to no avail, he could not pull back his hand. In fact, his motions caused his arm to further fall into the ground.

“Shit, does no one see this?” He thought to himself. “Where’s other people when you need them…”

He attempted to move toward his partially sunken arm to try and free it, but, by some bizarre coincidence, his foot decided to get caught on the uneven part of the sidewalk.

“GOD DAMNIT!” He screamed as he tried to stop his fall forward with his other arm. “WAIT. SHIT. WOULDN’T THIS MEAN MY OTHER ARM IS GONNA GET STUCK NOW!?” He sighed in defeat. “Fuck it, shit happens. I give up. At least I can say I tried...” He apathetically declared as he fell to his imminent demise.

“SHIIIIIIIIIIT!” He screamed at the top of his lungs as he completely fell through. He closed his eyes as he prepared for his cruel fate.

Twilight walked into the area, royal guards grouped together to form a barrier between the public and the portal’s current position. While the portal was in the sky, she needed to focus her magic perfectly, which would require her to be on more familiar territory; the ground.

“Alright…” She muttered as her horn began illuminating in a bright purple glow. “This shouldn’t be too hard… If I was able to open and close the portal, then closing it alone should be relatively simple…” She gulped. “I hope…”

With that, a bright spark came from her horn, which slowly turned into a full on shot of lightning. It quickly made contact with its target, thus linking the portal to her complete magic signature, allowing control over it.

Now that she was linked with the portal, not only would she be able to close it, she would be able to feel if something fell through. She immediately focused her magic on closing the portal, though her attempted were interrupted, as a small object fell through. She groaned as the object lingered between the two worlds, almost as if something was preventing it to complete its journey.

Shortly after, the object finally fell through, and Twilight let out a sigh of relief. She canceled her spell momentarily in order to see what it was.

The object hit the sidewalk with a soft “clank”. Twilight walked up to the object, identifying it to simply be a lanyard, with some keys.

“Keys?” She thought aloud. “Why would keys fall through the portal?” She placed a hoof on her chin. “I get that anything could’ve fallen through the portal at any time… but keys?”

“SHIIIIIIIIIIT!”

Twilight jerked her head up, finding something large falling down directly above her. She took a few steps back, preventing the large being from landing on top of her. Her horn glowed in a purple light once more, creating a bright flash of light in front of her. When the light was gone, a mattress was in its place, allowing a safe crash.

With a soft “thump”, the being landed onto the soft mattress, breaking his entire fall.

“Well.” Twilight spoke. “I suppose that explains the lanyard...”

"Did you just say lanyard?" Asked the object as he lay on the mattress face down. "Cause I kinda need that to get home."

“Heh.” Twilight chuckled. “Well, you’re pretty far away from home…”

"What do you mean pretty far?" Ish asked as he rose from the mattress. He looked at his surroundings, seeing an average city, which he merely shrugged at. “Not even gonna bother asking how or why I’m miles away from where I should be,” Then he looked towards the sound of the voice, and found it’s source. "Oh... Fuck... Jorge wasn't lying after all... Well… guess I'm not playing Dota anytime soon." Ish lowered himself and positioned himself more comfortably on the mattress.

"Oh. You know Jorge." Twilight narrowed her eyes, ignoring the foreign ‘dota’ word. She then chuckled at how the aforementioned human would react to someone else he knew was stuck with him. "You're quite lucky to wind up here... Uh... What's your name?"

His eyes lit up, “Damn RIGHT, I know Horhey!” Ish was struggling to hold back his laughter,”Depends, what did Jorge say his name was when he got here?”

"Why does that matter?" Twilight tilted her head to the side.

“Because I want to know if he actually asked you all to call him ‘Godson’.” Smiled the human. “But that’s irrelevant right now. You may refer to me as simply “Ish”, I could care less on what you do end up calling me.” Smirked Ish as he stood up from sitting on the mattress. “Now, shall we go see Jorge? I want to surprise him.”

“Not yet.” Twilight shook her head. “Introductions aside, I have a job to do.” Her horn illuminated in a purple glow once more, wiping the mattress from existence.

“Who died and made you leader?” Ish retorted. “Also, who said I was done with that?” He pointed at the lack of a mattress behind him.

Twilight simply sighed, ignoring the whining human as she returned back to concentrating to close the portal.

Too bored to just sit around, Ish started to survey the area a second time. He noticed a wall of ponies that appeared to be some sort of royal entourage encircling him.

“Well, shit. I don’t think I can just ditch Twilight and find Jorge on my own…” He thought as he walked back to where his mattress would’ve been. He noticed that his keys were still on the ground. “How the hell didn’t I pick this up earlier?” Ish looked at the time on his phone, only two minutes passed since Twilight started to ignore him. “My God, I’m so fucking bored. She’s been standing there for ages...”

Meanwhile, Twilight’s horn kept its purple glow as she focused her magic once more. A spark appeared on her horn once again, until it turned into a full on shot of lightning, shooting up to the portal, which had moved just a little from its original position. She screwed her eyes shut and groaned softly as she linked herself to the portal again, requiring only one more step to finish her job.

“Hooray!” Ish said sarcastically, “NOW can we go see Jorge? Watching you pretend you’re part of stage crew was literally the most boring thing I’ve done all day.”

Twilight lifted an eye, focusing on the impatient human, losing just a bit of her concentration. She gasped at a sudden pain in her head, and returned back to focusing on the portal. Her groans growing louder, the electricity between her horn and the portal was still the same, until her horn produced a bigger shock, sending it straight at the portal.

“Now that I think about it, do you ponies even have stage crews?” Ish asked, completely ignorant of Twilight’s growing annoyance and frustration. “Screw it, you do now. Whatever, I’m gonna go ask nicely for those ponies in shining armor to politely move the hell out of my way. Peace OUT Twi!”

As Ish walked towards the guards, the guards he got the closest to simply shook their heads, and their horns began to glow.

“Oh… I’m just gonna go back to my invisible mattress now…” said a regretful Ishtaba. “Damn these guards are uptight… Maybe Twilight’s still pretending she’s DJing an EDM concert...”

The portal quickly became visible, shocking the guards, and the ignorant human. Twilight’s groans turned into screams of pain as she sent another blast at the portal, causing it to shrink significantly.

“Oh, she actually looks like she’s having trouble. Maybe I should tone my shit down a bit. Nah, FUCK that. That’s effort,” Ish thought as he completely disregarded the flashing lights in the sky. He checked the time again, it was almost 4:00 p.m. “Really? Only 2 minutes have passed again? Shit, I’m hungry. She better finish fast cause my needs get priority over whatever alien abduction is going on here.”

Meanwhile, the portal continued to shrink more and more, reaching to the point where only an acorn could fit.

"ARE YOU DONE YET!? YOU'RE LITERALLY SLOWER THAN MOLASSES!" screamed Ish as he rummaged through his bag for snacks.

Twilight gave a final shout, sending one more blast to speed up the process. Fortunately for her and the impatient human, it worked. The portal closed, disconnecting both Equestria and Ish’s home.

Panting after the ordeal, she toppled over, and began losing consciousness.

“Princess!” One guard called out, running out to grab her.

"Oh, I'm so sorry for being intolerable. No one's ever fainted from my sheer ego before," said Ish, apparently even his sympathies are self-centered.

The guard looked up at Ish, gawking over his focus on nobody but himself. He looked back down at the Princess, and began covering her in his own magic aura.

"Anyway, if you want to help her grab me an ice pa- Oh wait you have fucking magic."

The guard looked up at the irritating human. “She’s going into a magically induced coma, idiot.”

"Here's the play. Let's get—”

“Princess Twilight already prepared me for this situation.” The guard interrupted. “I just need to wake her with a simple spe—”

"ORRRR…” Ish interrupted. “You give her this so she doesn't feel like crap when she gets up," he said as he pulled out a pill from his bag. "This is a fever reducer and a pain-killer, I bet your magic can't do this."

The guard opened his mouth to say something, but then shook his head, ignoring the human’s stupidity. He poked Twilight’s head with his horn, shrinking whatever’s causing her unconsciousness.

Twilight gasped for breath as she awoke from her temporary coma. She panted for breath as she looked around, recalling the past few minutes.

“Whew…” She sighed. “I did it…”

“You did it?” Ish raised an eyebrow. “What about me? I helped too! Also, take this, you probably feel like shit after that fainting," he said as he handed her the pill.

Twilight looked at the pill in his hand, then back at him. Never changing her blank expression as she continued to listen to the annoyance she was forced to call a human.

"Do you ponies not have any concept on concentrated medication…?" Ish asked. "I swear it's like I'm being ignored or something... It's only been like 20 minutes since I got here, and I'm already sick of you people."

Twilight sighed, closed her eyes, and lifted the pill with her magic. She opened her eyes, looking at the human. “If it’s so helpful…” The pill flew into Ish’s open mouth. “Why don’t you take some?”

Ish swallowed, "Because I'm not the one who was just on the ground unconscious, or the one groaning in pain 10 minutes ago."

“Ordinary medicines don’t work on magically induced problems.” Twilight stated, getting back up on all fours. She cleared her throat with a soft “ahem”.

"Aaand, I already don't feel like arguing anymore. Do you know where I can find real food?"

Twilight looked at the guard, and nodded. “The portal’s closed, we’ll be heading out back to Ponyville. Thank you.”

The guard nodded, walking up to the other guards, who all broke apart from their circular barrier.

Twilight looked back to Ish. “You’ll get food when we reach the train.”

"And how long is that from now?" he asked impatiently.

“Not too long…” Twilight looked at a nearby train station. “In fact, I think there’s one leaving in a couple of minutes…”

Ish was already lined up to get a ticket before she even finished. "Yeah you see that purple pony over there? Just ask her to cover the bill. I'll take two tickets to Ponyville please."

Twilight rolled her eyes, walked past Ish, and continued off to board the train.

“You mean that purple pony?” The ticket master looked at the mare already boarding the train.

"Does it look like there's another purple pony around here. For Christ's sake, all the guards were white. You're blue, and every pony else is every color BUT purple. So yes, that purple pony is my payment option."

“I’m pretty sure she’s not paying for your ticket, sir…”

"Trust me, I swear she is. Why else would she come all the way here with her guards just to see me," Ish said very non-persuasively.

The ticket master looked at the train, seeing no signs of Ish’s payment option.

"I won't complain to your manager if you let me on," he offered desperately. "If anything you were horribly disrespectful to me and refused me service. Also you spit in my face."

Sighing, Twilight walked back out of the train. “Look… I’m sorry if this idiot has caused you any trouble…” Twilight apologized, flaring her wings open, signifying her princess status.

"Trouble my ass," Ish mumbled. "I was this close to closing negotiations..."

“Shut up.” Twilight growled, shifting her attention back to the ticket master. “I previously ordered my ticket, expecting to go home alone.” She looked back at the human with narrowed eyes. “He kinda just… showed up unexpectedly…” She focused on the stallion in front of her once more, placing some bits down on the desk. “This should be enough to cover his ticket…”

He nodded in response, giving her Ish’s ticket. “I apologize for the trouble you must be facing, Princess.”

"I heard that! And I am very much offended!" said Ish as he began to wander off towards the train.

“Heh…” She huffed. “You have no idea…” She shrugged, walking back to the train.

As the duo found their seats, and gave up their tickets, Ish was already eating some leftover waffles.

“What the hay is wrong with you!?” Twilight shouted at the human.

"Food was taking too long to get here," he replied as he took a bite out of his chocolate chip waffle. "I have an unopened bag of cookies if you want."

“Not the food.” Twilight shook her head. “You’re so self-absorbed! I-I’ve never met a human so ignorant, so stupid, so…”

“Handsome?” Ish finished. "Or is the word you’re looking for ‘godlike’?"

“No!” Twilight yelled in frustration. “Not even Shadow was this annoying! And he’s proven himself to be an even bigger idiot than Jorge at the moment!”

"You can't call me self-absorbed, I'm too perfect for that!" he argued. "Wait did you just say SHADOW!? I was under the assumption only Jorge was here."

“No, Shadow’s here, too.” Twilight shook her head once more. “He fell through the same portal you fell through.”

"Let's make a deal, I'll tone down my narcissism. And you give me an exact rundown of everything that's happened so far since Jorge got stuck here."

Twilight blinked. “Really?”

“Yeah. I want to know what’s happened before shit hits the fan.”

“How about I fill you in on everything that’s happened since Shadow arrived and leave you to figure out what’s happened to Jorge?”

“Deal.” he said. “Wow, I’m so good at negotiating…”

Author's Note

WERE YOU EXPECTING SOMEONE ELSE!?

And, uh, yeah. It's a two parter.

Chapter 2-5: Everything is fine...ish (Pt.2)

“How long does Shadow’s tattoo last, again?”

“For the next couple of days, unless he does something to redeem himself in less time.”

“Alright. So, I have an idea to surprise the—”

“No need. I already have something planned out.” Twilight smirked, turning her head to look out the window.

“Really?” Ish raised an eyebrow. “What is it?”

“Just follow my lead.” Twilight blatantly stated.

If it was one thing Ishtaba hated about anything, it was people— or in this case, ponies— being vague. It required him to try to think of what they were trying to imply or what details they were trying to omit. It required effort, one thing he wasn’t known for doing too well.

“Fine.” He laid back, crossing his arms. “How much farther are we?”

“Not much longer.” Twilight estimated. “We should be there in a matter of minutes, at this rate…”

“‘Aight. I’m fine with that.”

“We’ve reached our destination.”

“Alright. Don’t walk out until I call you.” Twilight commanded.

“But if you call my name, you’ll ruin the surprise!”

“I’m not gonna call your name!”

“Oh, right. That makes sense,” Ish sighed a breath of relief.

As the doors slowly opened, Twilight quickly turned her head back.

“Quick, move out of the way, so they don’t see you.”

The doors in front of her began to reveal the three friends that she was focused on surprising. Rainbow Dash was more of an extra, as she was aiming more at surprising and or shocking the two humans.