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                 How I Lived In Equestria                  
                        -by Godson-                        
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                  Chapter 1-2: "Official"                  
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Chapter 1-2: "Official"
The sun shone through the window, a slight breeze could be felt around the room. Godson clenched his eyes shut more than it already was as the sun tried to blind him, even while his eyes were closed.
He slowly opened his eyes, only to instantly shut them as the sun attempted to attack him with blindness. He moved his head slightly, taking his eyes away from the sunlight. Once the sun was out of his eyes, he opened them.
The first thing he woke up to was a sleeping Rainbow Dash, her forelegs and rear legs wrapped around him, she rested her head on his pillow, allowing them to be closer together, practically breathing the same air. The mare in front of him cooed softly in her sleep, carrying a content smile as she snuggled closer to him.
He smiled warmly at the adorable sight, he noticed his own arms were wrapped around her. Taking advantage of this, he tightened his grip on her, pulling her even closer to him. As he slowly began to wake up completely, he began to notice a few notice a few things about the mare he held. Besides the fact they were in his bedroom, her mane was disheveled, her wings were all ruffled, evidence of the events that transpired last night.
Speaking of last night… Weren’t they on the couch?
Godson examined the area he was lying on, noticing they were indeed in his bed. He’d ask how he got here, but as it’s just the two of them in his house, it’s most likely he carried her here.
Dash stirred in her sleep, mumbling something he couldn't quite understand. He immediately froze in place as she moved, trying to keep her asleep for just a little while longer.
It worked for the most part, as her random mumbling slowly died down. He sighed a breath of relief, only for the mare to tighten her grip on him. “My human…” She muttered softly, scooting herself lower as she nuzzled into the crook of his neck. “Mine…”
His heart warmed at the cuddly mare’s actions. It was a bit of a surprise to see how much of a soft side she has, even though he somewhat expected it. He just didn’t expect her to be so…
Adorable.
His hand slowly found his way to her head, idly stroking her mane softly as he continued to lay in bed.
She shuffled as he petted her, her eyes slowly opening as she began to wake. She noticed her current position, and took it to her slight advantage.
Godson jolted in surprise as he felt something soft, warm, yet moist press against his neck. He wanted to look down, but he also didn’t want to accidentally bonk her in the head by moving his head. After a few seconds, he figured it was Dash, playfully licking his neck.
And he was right, Dash started licking at his neck, slowly travelling up more and more until she was face to face with him once more. She carried a playful smirk on her face as she stopped her licking right at his chin.
“Good morning~...” Dash cooed.
“Good morning…” Godson replied softly. “Enjoy your sleep?”
“You have no idea…” Dash said with a giggle. “You?”
“I slept good, yeah.” Godson nodded.
“Good…” Dash muttered, stifling a yawn. “Ugh, I’m tired…”
“I bet you are, after everything that happened last night.” Godson joked.
“Ohhh… But it was so worth it…” Dash smiled.
Godson chuckled softly at the mare’s response. Then, he remembered something. After mentioning last night, something was immediately brought to his attention.
“Well. I’m glad you enjoyed it.” Godson said abruptly, leaning in for a quick peck. “But I just remembered something.”
“Can it wait a couple of hours…?” Dash murmured. “I wanna snuggle some more, I need more sleep.”
“Sorry, Dashie...” Godson shook his head. “It just can’t wait, I just remembered I’m out of bleach, and I really need to go get some before the market closes.” He explained, slowly getting off of bed.
Dash whined as he left her alone in the bed. “Gonna use it on the couch?”
“No, shuddap.” Godson retorted, quickly walking out the room.
“Clean it real good, ya never know when we’re going to use it again!”
”Shut up!”
“You’re in your underwear!”
…
Godson walked back into the room, pointing a finger at Dash as he walked into the bathroom. “Shuddap.”
Dash simply bursted into laughter.
Godson groaned as he walked through the town he now calls his home. Nearly everypony in town had already gotten adjusted to the human living there. At first, most of the townsfolk were scared out of their minds over the large human, despite they would be the same size as him, if not taller, if they stood on their hindlegs.
Other ponies were simply curious over the new creature, and some even went as far as saying hello to him.
Little by little, more ponies had mustered enough courage to talk to the human, and eventually, everypony simply treated him as if he was one of them. Which he was perfectly fine with, having too attention focused on himself probably wouldn’t be the best of experiences.
Of course, there were a few ponies who either haven’t met him, or are still scared of him.
Surprisingly enough, Ponyville does have a small indoor grocery shop, despite his assumptions. Kinda like the pony equivalent of Publix, only a little smaller, and no meat.
He entered the small store, quickly noticing how the store seemed very reminiscent to Publix back home.
Unfortunately, he barely went to Publix for grocery shopping, which only made his task seem a lot harder than he hoped, as the two stores were seemingly alike.
He took in a deep breath, and sighed, thus beginning his journey to find bleach.
Aisle through aisle the human checked, ignoring the fact each of them had their own labels with a few examples of the items it carried. He’d gone through several aisles, coming across foods, drinks, household supplies, and yet, no bleach.
“Why is bleach so hard to find?” He thought aloud.
During his frantic searching, he came across a certain yellow pegasus in one of the aisles.
Yet, before he could say anything, she spoke up first.
“Oh! Hey there, Godson.” Fluttershy spoke with a smile. “Surprise bumping into you here.”
“I know, right?” Godson smiled back. “Hey, I appreciate you watching Linda for me, I’ll stop by in a little bit to pick her up.”
“Oh, that won’t be necessary.”
“Why’s that?”
Just like that, he heard the soft sounds of paws running in his direction. He quickly turned around to identify the source of the sound, only to see his dog running towards him, holding a bag of dog treats.
“Woah.” Godson stood there, speechless. “How’d you get her to stop barking at everypony?”
“It was really easy, actually.” Fluttershy answered, grabbing the bag of dog treats from the dog. “I just asked nicely. And told her that the ponies here are really nice, and wouldn’t want to hurt her.”
“Sounds like I could use the staples button at this point.” Godson thought. “Speaking of which… I wonder if I still have the app, anyway…”
“Oh, my… You have an expensive taste, don’t you, Linda?” Fluttershy looked at the small dog.
“Huh?” Godson interrupted. “Flutters, I can pay for it, it’s no big deal.”
“I promised her I’d get any kind of treats she wanted.” Fluttershy admitted. “I can’t break my promise to her, it would just be unfair.”
Godson blinked at the mare’s strange reply, then immediately shrugged. “Right, I forgot that you can communicate with animals.” He looked at the dog next to him, simply sitting down, with her tongue poking out of her mouth. He was surprised to see how easily Fluttershy was able to train her to stop barking at the townsfolk, after only having her for one day.
“So, what are you doing here, anyway?” Fluttershy asked abruptly. “I thought Rainbow Dash was spending the night?”
“Oh, she did. In fact, she’s still in bed, sleeping.” Godson replied with a chuckle. “I would’ve stayed in bed with her, but I need to buy some supplies, though I’m having a little trouble finding the things I need.”
“What are you looking for?” Fluttershy tilted her head. “Maybe I can help, I know this shop like the back of my hoof.”
“Mostly just some bleach, and more dog food while I’m already here.” Godson explained, catching Linda’s attention at the very mention of dog food.”
“Hm.” Fluttershy placed a hoof on her chin. “Bleach is over on…” She took a few steps out of the current aisle she was, quickly catching the number of the other aisle she was thinking about. “Aisle 9.” She returned to her initial spot. “I hope you don’t mind me asking… But are you cleaning something white or color?”
“Uh… Color. Brown, actually.”
“Yeah, they have this new ‘color safe’ bleach, I haven’t really tried it, but it’s worth a shot, anyway.” Fluttershy added. “I don’t remember Rarity making any brown clothes…”
“Yeah, it’s uh… it’s for the couch…” Godson reached for the back of his head, smiling sheepishly.
“Oh!” Fluttershy gasped. “D-Does that mean you two are officially a couple, now?”
“Huh?” Godson raised an eyebrow. “What do you mean by that?”
“Um, i-it’s nothing.” Fluttershy immediately blushed. “It’s probably none of my business, anyway…”
“No, hold on a sec.” Godson shook his head. “What do you mean ‘officially a couple’?”
“You mean… you don’t know?” Fluttershy went wide-eyed. “I thought you would’ve known…”
“Don’t know what?” Godson copied her expression. “Flutters, what is it I don’t know, exactly?”
“Have you… um… y’know…” Fluttershy’s blush grew brighter, covering more parts of her face the more she thought about it.
“Have sex?”
Fluttershy nodded softly.
“Why’s that important?”
“Well, when two ponies… um… make love… for the first time in their relationship… that’s when they make it o-official…”
“So, like… marriage?”
Fluttershy shook her head. “I think Twilight would be better at explaining it more…”
Godson tried to wrap his head around the mare’s vague explanation, not wanting to upset her, he nodded in agreement. “Yeah, I’ll go ask Twilight in a little bit. Sorry for all the trouble.”
“Oh, it was no trouble at all… it was just a little uncomfortable trying to explain it…” Fluttershy’s voice suddenly got quieter at the end of that sentence, but then immediately returned to normal. “But, yeah, it’d be better asking Twilight.”
“Yeah, being the bookworm she is, she’ll know how to explain it.” Godson thought aloud. “Thanks again for all your help, Flutters.”
“Glad I was able to help.” Fluttershy smiled. “Oh, and… here’s the bits for the treats.” She leaned over to Linda. “I hope you enjoy the treats, Linda.”
And with that, she walked off, continuing the rest of her shopping.
“Welp. Time to go have a talk with Twilight…”
“You mean you don’t know?” Twilight tilted her head.
“Yeah, I know. That’s why I came here to ask you.” Godson facepalmed. “Of course I don’t know, why do you think I’m here asking you?’
“Right.” Twilight smiled sheepishly. “Of course you wouldn’t know, you’ve only been here for… four months now, right?”
Godson nodded. “That sounds about right.”
“Wow, these months have gone flying by, haven’t they?”
“Just a little bit…”
“Anyway…” Twilight got back to the main reason he was here. “Yeah, when two ponies… er… mate… for the first time in their relationship. It means that, right then, right there, they’re… how would I say this… ‘claiming’ each other. Thus, making their relationship ‘official’.”
“So… like, marriage?”
“Not at all.” Twilight shook her head. “Hm, perhaps I worded that wrong…” She placed a thinking hoof on her chin. “Uh… okay, forget the whole ‘claiming’ thing. Think of it more like… uh… Expressing their love to each other, but uh… different.”
“So, basically, having sex is just another way of saying ‘I Love You’.” Godson mused.
“You could say that, only, it means more than that.” Twilight paused as she tried to find the perfect words to explain it, she then had an idea based on his statement. “It’s like saying ‘I Love You’, yes, but it also means ‘I’d never leave you’, ‘I’m all yours’, y’know, that kind of stuff.” She continued. “But, minus the whole marriage thing. I’m going on a limb here and assuming it’s the same as it is in your world.”
“Should be. Wedding, marriage, rings, cake, all that stuff.”
“Yeah. It’s the same.” Twilight concluded. “Only difference between marriage and making one’s relationship with another ‘official’, is that marriage brings the couple to an even greater bond. As now they’re making a promise. A promise tha—”
“The usual marriage stuff, yeah.” Godson interjected. “But wait… what happens if you try having sex with someone else while you’re already ‘official’?”
Twilight instantly narrowed her eyes at the question. “You don’t want to know.”
Her quick reaction caused Godson widened his eyes in fear, knowing he’d rather not know. He nodded in response. “Good thing I have the only mare I’d want to be with…”
And with that, Twilight shifted her attitude, from serious to joyous. The shift in attitude also caused Godson more worry, but he figured as long as he doesn’t screw anything up, he’d be fine.
“Well, glad I was able to fill you in that.” Twilight smiled. “Otherwise who knows how much trouble you would’ve gotten into if you wouldn’t have asked.”
“Not much…” Godson crossed his arms. “It’s not like I was planning on screwing up my relationship with Dash.”
“Hm. I suppose you’re right.” Twilight commented. “Well, if you need any more help, don’t hesitate to ask, alright?”
“Of course!”
Godson slowly opened the door to his room, attempting his best to keep the mare asleep for as long as he can. He watched as his dog ran to the bed, jumping on top as soon as she got close enough. She maneuvered her way under the blankets, somehow not disturbing the sleeping mare.
He walked in the room, softly closing the door behind him. He stepped through the room as quietly as possible, getting closer and closer to the bed. Once he got close enough, he sat down on his side, taking off his shoes, then proceeded to lay down next to her.
The mare in front of him hummed softly, stirring around as she slowly opened her eyes.
“Oh, sure. When Linda gets in bed, you don’t feel it, but when I get in bed, you suddenly wake up…” Godson thought. “Hey there, Dashie…”
“Hey…” Dash smiled softly. “Cleaned the couch?”
“Yeah, I did.” Godson nodded. “Fluttershy told me about a ‘color-safe’ bleach, and I tried it out. Works pretty well.”
“That’s good…” Dash muttered. “So then… what’re you doin’ back here?”
“Gonna take a nap with my favorite mare, what else am I gonna do?” Godson replied with a soft laugh, covering himself with the blankets. “So… we’re officially a couple, now?”
“Mhm.” Dash hummed. “Wasn’t that the whole point of me asking you last night?”
“So was what happened afterwards.” Godson teased.
“Oooh… That’s right…” Dash smirked as she was reminded of last night’s events. “Is there something wrong with us being a couple?”
“Not at all.” Godson shook his head. “As long as it’s with you, I don’t care.”
“You’re not gonna even complain I asked too fast?” Dash raised an eyebrow.
Godson wrapped his arms around her. “You’re not the fastest mare in Equestria for nothing.” He pulled her closer to him. “I might’ve preferred you waiting a little bit longer before you asked… but, eh, I get it, you’re an impatient mare.”
“Thanks…” Dash murmured.
“Though, to be fair, I’m a bit impatient too.” Godson chuckled.
Dash laughed softly at the human’s comment. Wanting to get even closer to the human, she moved her rear legs around in an attempt to wrap his legs, but instead found something warm and furry.
“Uh… Godson?”
“Yeah?”
“Is Linda here?”
“In bed?”
“Yeah.”
“Yeah, she sleeps in the bed, too.”
“Has she always slept in the bed?”
“Ever since I’ve had her.”
Dash lifted the blankets, looking down at the dog, sleeping at the foot of the bed.
“Hm.” She uttered. “I guess I can live with that. Tank does the same thing in my house.”
“Your turtle?” Godson asked.
“Mhm.” Dash nodded with a hum. “Don’t worry about him, though. I left enough food that’ll last a couple of days. I’ll check on him in a few hours…” She wrapped her forelegs around the human. “But for now… I’mma cuddle with my human.”
“I wouldn’t have it any other way…”
Author's Note
Despite what you might think, this whole "official" thing is actually going to leave an effect on the story. You won't see it having much effect here for a while, but I promise, I planned this thing out for a reason.
Even though it kinda sounds like total bullsh*t that a five year old made up. But we're not here for a good story, we're here for something a few friends and I made purely for the sh*ts and giggles!
Besides, I've seen stories have their own logic for Equestria, so I figured why the heck not?
But at least you got some fluff.

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             Chapter 1-3: "Omigosh, a human!"              
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Chapter 1-3: "Omigosh, a human!"
“That was easy.”
“Ha! I still have the app!”
Godson sat in a bench outside Sugarcube Corner, just finding out that he’ll be having a few days off of work, adding to the day he already had off yesterday. It was both good and bad. Bad because he wouldn’t get paid for those days off, but good because he really didn’t feel like working today.
At least he saved some bits to last him until then…
He stood from the bench, returning his phone to it’s temporary home. He attempted to figure out what he could do while Dash was at work.
“Ugh. I’m off from work, and Dash isn’t.” He whined. “The heck am I supposed to do until she gets out?”
Suddenly, Twilight walked by, catching notice of the human. “Hey, Godson. I was actually looking for you!” She cheered. “I kinda need some help wi—”
“Shut up, Twilight!” Godson brought his hands to his head. “I’m trying to think of something to do while Dash is at work!”
Twilight stared blankly at the human. “Here’s an idea…” She began. “Why not help me out with some stuff until she’s done?”
“Hm. No, that’s a dumb idea.” Godson shook his head. Not too long later, an idea popped into his head. “I got it!” He shouted. “How about I help you out until she’s done?”
“Gee… I wonder how you came up with that idea…”
“Uh... What exactly did you need me to do?”
“Well, I needed someone to help me test a spell I found.”
“So I’m basically going to be your test dummy, aren’t I?”
“Yeah. Pretty much.”
“Great…” Godson sighed. “What kind of spell did you find, exactly?”
“According to what I’ve read, it’s supposedly a spell to freeze someone right in their tracks.” Twilight explained.
“Frozen in ice?”
“No.” Twilight shook her head. “More like, the subject’s whole body is just… stuck.”
“So... kinda like... paralysed?”
“Somewhat.” Twilight nodded. “If you were running, you’d be stuck in that pose, if you were in the air, you’d be stuck in the air until you were unfrozen.”
“Frozen in time, then?”
“Yeah, almost. You can still breathe, move your eyes, that kind of stuff, apparently, but that’s pretty much it.” Twilight concluded. “But I needed to test it something living, and I’m not gonna put Spike in harm’s way…”
“...So you’d be perfectly fine throwing me in harm’s way.” Godson finished the sentence.
“Exactly!” Twilight beamed, then ultimately caught herself, going wide-eyed as she realized what she said. “N-No! That’s not what I…!”
“Relax. I’m messing with you.” Godson teased. “Geez, learn to take a joke.”
Twilight narrowed her eyes, pissed over the human’s stupidity. She took a deep breath, and began preparing herself as she started to cast the spell. Her horn illuminated in a bright purple glow.
The test dummy in question suddenly felt a tingling in his entire body as it was being engulfed in Twilight’s magic aura, starting from his feet, climbing up until it reached the top of his head. Once her magic completely surrounded him, it faded away, and he found himself no longer able to move.
“There.” Twilight smiled at her new accomplishment. “That’ll teach you to keep joking around.”
Godson tried to move his head to look at himself, but no avail. He attempted to move his eyeballs, which seemed to work, as well as his obvious breathing. He attempted to move his mouth.
“Test.” He said aloud. “Great… Being frozen while being able to talk… I think you screwed up your spell, Twilight.”
“No I didn’t.” Twilight shook her head. “That was something that I intentionally did. Just to add to the annoyance.”
“Hm.” Godson hummed. “Well, it does feel out-of-place… Now, put me back to normal.”
“What?”
“Put me back to normal.”
“What’s the magic word?”
“...Please?”
“Nope!” Twilight’s face suddenly morphed into an evil smile. “I said the magic word”
“The heck is that supposed to even mean!?”
"Too late!" Twilight’s horn quickly began to glow once more, surrounding the frozen human in the glow as well. “All the times you played jokes on me... now it’s my turn!”
“I don’t like the sound of that…”
The door magically opened on it’s own, and soon, Godson found himself floating his way towards the door.
“Twilight...? What are you doing...?”
The fact he was unable to move frightened him even more, as he wasn’t able to even turn his head to see what was going on behind him. He was frozen, perfectly standing, unable to move a single muscle in his body.
As he levitated out of the door, Twilight followed suit. And eventually, she turned him around, and placed him down.
“Wait, why am I being placed down out here?”
Twilight simply ignored him, and continued with her work. As he was placed down on the ground, her aura faded away once again. She had placed him in an area right between her yard, and the ‘road’ in which everypony casually walked in.
“Annnnnd…. There.” Twilight nodded. “Have fun, Godson!” With that, she walked back into the library.
“What?” Godson worriedly spoke. Though before he could try to say anything else, the door far behind him closed with a soft “click”.
“Of course…” He sighed. “Well… guess I deserved this…”
He moved his eyes in attempt to look around, watching as everypony simply walked around and minding their own business. While there was a number of people who noticed the frozen human, no one ever stopped to question whether it was just a realistic looking statue, or actually him standing still for no reason.
“Well… At least it can’t get any worse than this…” He thought aloud.
“Omigosh, a human!”
“...I spoke too soon, didn’t I?”
Lyra walked up to the frozen human. “Omigoshomigoshomigosh!” She yelled in pure excitement. “This is a perfect statue of a human! It looks so life-like and everything!”
“Lyra…” Bonbon whined. “Enough of this huma—”
“Tell me you see this.” Lyra interrupted. “Tell me I’m not the only one who sees this!”
Bonbon looked at him, then back at her. “Alright… yeah, I see it.”
“This is a human!”
“How would you know?”
“There’s a book all about humans, and how they live in another world, different from ours!” Lyra explained. “I forgot who wrote it, but it was accurately detailed!”
“‘Accurate’. Right…” Bonbon rolled her eyes.
“I wonder what’s it doing sitting out here in front of the Golden Oaks Library…” Lyra placed a hoof on her chin.
“Does it matter, Lyra?” Bonbon inquired. “Just leave it alone…” She sighed, continuing her walk to her destination.
Meanwhile, Godson stayed completely silent, allowing the duo to think he was merely just a statue.
“I think it’s out here for anypony to take…”
“No it’s not…”
“I should take it…”
“No you shouldn’t…”
“I’m gonna take it…”
“Don’t take it, Lyra…”
“TOO LATE!” Lyra excitedly shouted, already levitating the ‘statue’ with her magic.
Bonbon looked back, seeing the mare already walking up to her with the ‘statue’ floating nearby. She sighed, shrugging off the idea of wanting to argue with her over the ‘statue’, knowing she wasn’t going to get anywhere by doing so, anyway.
“This would look great in the back yard!”
Twilight hummed softly as she got her rest from Godson. At the same time, this allowed him to stay out of trouble until Rainbow Dash returned from work. It wasn’t that she felt that he was completely dumb and irresponsible, it was just, at times, he actually was.
Her door softly opened, with Dash slowly peeking her head in. “Hey… Twilight?” She spoke softly.
Twilight turned her head to the door. “Yeah?”
“Have you seen Godson?” Dash asked worriedly. “I can’t find him anywhere… He’s not home, he’s not at work, and he doesn’t come by here too often…”
“He’s not in the front yard?” Twilight raised an eyebrow.
“No?” Dash raised an eyebrow as well. “Why would he?”
Twilight winced at the yelling she would soon receive. “I kinda… froze him with a spell… And then left him outside…”
“So why isn’t he there…?”
“Uh…”
“YOU LOST HIM!?” Dash shouted, her wings sprung open in rage over Twilight’s actions.
“No!” Twilight retorted. “I just… misplaced him…!”
Dash narrowed her eyes. “You ‘misplaced’ him…”
“Yeah…” Twilight sheepishly smiled.
Dash rolled her eyes. “Cool. So, Godson is out who knows where. And can’t even escape thanks to a spell you tested on him.” She sighed.
“He volunteered to help me test!”
“Did he volunteer to being used as a garden gnome?”
“Er…”
“Exactly.”
Twilight scoffed. “You make it sound like such a big deal.”
“It is a big deal!” Dash countered.
“This is Godson we’re talking about.” Twilight pointed out. “I’m sure he can’t be in that much trou—Now I see why you’re worrying…”
“Glad to see you understand.” Dash nodded. “'Cause you're gonna help find him!”
“I still can’t believe Twilight would want to throw out a statue like this…”
“She didn’t… You stole it…”
“Steal is such a harsh word!” Lyra retorted. “I prefer I… rescued it.”
“Rescued it from what, Lyra?” Bonbon raised an eyebrow.
“...The trash?” Lyra replied with a sheepish grin. “Oh, come on, Bonbon! I really doubt Twilight would just leave a statue of a human outside the library for no reason at all!”
“I’m sure she has her reasons…” Bonbon rolled her eyes. “Maybe she was redecorating, and needed to move it out of the way.”
“Or she was getting ready to throw it out to the trash…” Lyra added.
“Alright. Fine.” Bonbon shook her head. “I give up. But if somepony starts looking for their statue back, I’m going to tell them you stole it.”
“Nopony’s gonna want this statue!” Lyra countered. “If you don’t believe humans exist, why would anypony else?”
Bonbon sighed. She knew she wasn’t going to win this argument. While Lyra was right about herself being the only one who believes humans exists, Bonbon still believed Twilight had that statue for a reason.
She looked up, and noticed a rainbow trail in the sky. It quickly faded, though she already knew who created that trail. She looked back in the library’s direction, despite already being far away, and saw the trail ended there.
“C’mon!” Lyra nudged her. “We’re almost home!”
Fortunately, Bonbon wasn’t the only one who noticed the rainbow trail.
“I hope Dash finds me… soon.” Godson thought. “I’m not sure how long I can stand being somepony’s ‘statue’...”
He started thinking about how bad Twilight might be feeling whenever she realized he’s gone missing, with absolutely no way back. Or how his waifu/marefriend is feeling over his disappearance.
Not long later, he snapped out of his train of thought. And he instantly found himself in a new area. Without even realizing it, he was already brought home to Lyra’s house. He scanned his surroundings, finding a door not too far away, indicating him being in a separate room, a picture frame sitting on a nearby table, and other normal household objects.
What he couldn’t see, however, was the room he was actually placed in. All he could see was a part of the room, and the door in front of him. Unfortunately for him, the room he was placed in was not an ordinary room.
Behind him was a shrine to humans. Drawings, paintings, copies of the book she previously mentioned. Anything you could find related to humans was right here in this shrine.
And Godson was put right in front of it all.
Rainbow Dash searched frantically for her human, asking everypony if they saw him, or even a statue of him. Everyone she’d ask would turn up with a negative result. She hoped she’d find him soon, otherwise she’d worry herself to death. While she wasn’t too worried that he could get hurt while being frozen, she was more worried over the fact she would never see him again.
Upon finding somepony she hadn’t already asked, she walked up to them. “Excuse me… Have you seen Godson?”
“Godson?”
“Yeah… Like, super tall, walks around on two feet, wears clothes all the time?”
“You mean that creature who has that barking dog?”
“Yeah! That’s him!” Dash confirmed. “Have you seen him?”
“Nope.”
She sighed. “Alright, thanks anyway.” She slowly turned around, preparing to leave. Then quickly turned her head to double-check something. “What about a statue of him, have you seen that anywhere around?”
“Not that I know of… no. Sorry.”
“Alright.” Dash nodded. “Thanks again.”
She flew off into the sky, scanning the small town in an attempt to find her ‘boyfriend’.
Godson insisted instead of referring to him as her ‘stallionfriend’, to refer to him as her ‘boyfriend’ instead, since he wasn’t a stallion. She laughed at the memory, which only made her worry even more. She wasn’t sure what she’d do without her childish human.
Dash got closer to the ground. Her previous birds-eye view hadn’t helped, so she figured getting a closer look around would yield more results.
“I still can’t believe Lyra had to take that darn statue…”
Dash’s ear twitched at the mention of a statue. She turned her head, seeing a slightly irritated Bonbon walking off to Sugarcube Corner. Dash raised an eyebrow, wondering if the ‘statue’ she was referring to is actually her frozen boyfriend.
She landed on the ground, and ran off to the muttering mare.
“Hey… Uh.”
Bonbon looked towards the sound of her voice, seeing Rainbow Dash walking next to her.
“Yes, Rainbow Dash?” She raised an eyebrow.
“I heard something about a statue. Uh, I wanted to ask you something about it.”
Bonbon stopped walking, catching Dash off guard. “Oh?”
Dash turned around to face the mare. “Was the ‘statue’ in front of the Golden Oak Library?”
Bonbon nodded.
“I heard Lyra took it?”
Bonbon nodded again.
“‘Kay, well, I want it back.” Dash bluntly stated. “It’s my statue, don’t ask why it was in front of the library, I didn’t put it there.”
“Oh!” Bonbon’s eyes widened. “I knew there was a reason why that statue was there!”
“So. Uh. Yeah. Can I have it back?” Dash sheepishly smiled.
“Of course!” Bonbon nodded enthusiastically, “I’ll even take you to it myself! And… For the record, I told her not to take it.”
Dash blinked. “Wow… That was easy…”
Godson reflected on the past hour he stood in front of the shrine. Lyra had came once or twice to mutter random crap about humans. And sometimes she’d just smile at the ‘statue’ whenever she passed by.
The longer he stayed here, the more he wanted to see Rainbow Dash again.
“The statue’s down the hall, to the right.”
“Bonbon! What are you doing!?”
“That statue you took belongs to Rainbow Dash!”
“Then what was it doing in front of Golden Oak?”
Dash walked in the room. “Finally…” She sighed of relief. “I found you…”
Lyra quickly ran in the room. “Why do you even have this statue anyway?”
Dash raised an eyebrow. “Why do you want it?” She looked back at Godson, and noticed all the paintings and human-related objects all placed together in a shrine. Immediately, she went wide-eyed. “Uh. Okayyyyyy…”
“It’s just a statue, Rainbow Dash! Why not let me keep it? It’d be better off with me, anyway!”
“Uhh.. No… It needs to go back home.” Dash paused for a moment. “With me.”
“It’s just a dumb statue!” Lyra whined. “You’re just gonna stuff it in some closet and not care about it!”
“How would you know?” Dash asked. “What if I have my own human shrine?”
“Do you?”
“...No. But that’s not the point!”
“Then what are you gonna do with it!?”
“If you wanna see, then help me take it back to Twilight’s.”
Lyra looked at the statue, which seemed to be looking directly at Dash, instead of straight ahead. She shook her head, and saw it looking straight ahead again. She looked back at Dash, who kept an irritated look.
“Fine.” Lyra groaned. “But I wanna see what you’re gonna do with it.”
“Fine by me.” Dash chuckled at a new thought. “This is gonna be… interesting.”
Twilight opened her door. “Dash… I can’t find hi—”
“I did.” Dash smiled. Pointing at the statue behind her. “And, uh, if you don’t mind, I brought Lyra to see something.”
Twilight turned her head to the unicorn, then back at Dash. “That’s fine.”
She walked up to the frozen human, her horn illuminating in a purple glow as she got closer and closer.
“What’s she doing…?” Lyra whispered.
Soon enough, the human started glowing in the same purple glow. Little by little, he was starting to be able to move. It started as tiny movements from his fingers, until he was fully able to move again.
Once Twilight’s aura vanished off of his body, he went completely limp, falling over on the floor.
Dash ran up to him. Leaving Lyra gawking and wide-eyed.
Godson was quickly lifted up to his knees by a pair of cyan hooves. The ones that belonged to the mare he thought he wouldn’t see again. Groaning, he lifted his head in an attempt to see her face.
“You alright?” She asked.
“Yeah…” He attempted to nod, though instead of doing so, he winced as he tried. “Just… not moving for an hour or so kinda has me cramping… everywhere.”
“At least you’re back.” Dash sighed of relief.
“Were you worried about me?”
“No!” Dash retorted. “...Yes.”
“Heh…” Godson chuckled. “I was too…”
Dash pulled the human closer, allowing her to wrap her hooves around him. She stood up on her rear legs with wings flared open as she tried to help her boyfriend stand.
“Dash?”
“Hm?”
“Trying to help me stand isn’t... well… helping.”
“Need me to carry you home?” Dash queried.
“Please?” Godson asked softly.
“Ugh.” Dash groaned. “Sure… But you’ll have to owe me something when you can stand again.”
Godson smiled warmly. “Of course. Love you, Dashie.”
Dash smiled back. “Love you too.” She reached her head forward, locking lips with the human.
Meanwhile, Lyra remained watching, completely confused over the events that transpired in front of her.
“What… What just happened…?”
Dash broke apart from the kiss, turning her head to the confused unicorn.
“You wanted to know what I was gonna do with the statue? This was it.” Dash smirked. “Lyra. Meet Godson. He’s not a statue. He never was…”
“So…” Lyra walked up to the human, whom was still wrapped in his marefriend’s hooves. “All this time… it wasn’t a statue…”
“Blame Twilight…” Godson rolled his eyes. “She wanted to test a spell, I let her, and the next thing I know, I’m kidnapped by a human-crazed mare.”
“B-But… You’re actually real!”
“So?”
“That’s… amazing! Are there more of you?”
“I’m the only one.” Godson replied.
“And he’s mine.” Dash added.
“And you two are… dating?”
Dash nodded, speaking for both her and the human. “Yep! We’re officially dating!”
“O-Oh!” Lyra went wide-eyed. “I-I’m sorry for uh… stealing you… like that…”
“Let’s just pretend it didn’t happen.” Godson attempted to shake his head, but fail ultimately. “It’s all Twilight’s fault anyway.”
“Speaking of Twilight…” Dash spoke, turning around just a little bit to be able to turn her head to the mare behind her. “No more testing spells on my boyfriend!” She pointed a hoof at her. “You can test spells on me, on Spike, doesn’t matter. But no more testing them on Godson.”
“Wha… Fine…” Twilight groaned. “I won’t test spells on him anymore…”
“Good.” Dash nodded, looking back to her human.
“Alright, can, uh… can we go home?” Godson asked. “I’m thirsty…”
“Oooh… Thirsty, huh? I know the per—”
“Get your mind out of the gutter, Dashie. I need water.”
“Hmph. You’re no fun.”

//-------------------------------------------------------//
                   Chapter 1-4: Sick Day                   
//-------------------------------------------------------//
Chapter 1-4: Sick Day
Godson laid in bed, arms and legs sprawled out, he woke up today having a horrible fever. Which somewhat worried him. Being in another world was one thing, but being sick in another world is another. What if he had a cold? Ponies have common colds in this world, but what if he had something worse than a cold?
Fortunately, Dash was with him when he woke up. It was a calm moment at first, then quickly took a different turn. He softly spoke up saying he didn’t feel too good, and her, being the worried marefriend she usually is, she placed a hoof on his forehead, and felt his head to be extremely hot. She grabbed a thermometer and used it to check for a fever, the result came at 99.6.
While it was just a slight fever, it still worried her some. Since he’s never had any illnesses while living in Equestria. For the past hour or so, she’s been on the living room watching TV, but still coming by every so often to check on him. She even went as far as quickly visiting her job and telling them that she might not make it for the next few days. Luckily, she had more than enough vacation days to cover it.
If he wasn’t too lazy to time how long before her random checks, he’d guess she came about every five minutes.
Yeah, that seemed about right.
Every five minutes his marefriend came to check on him. It didn’t bother him, he was actually glad to see how much she cared about him. Despite only being together for about two and a half weeks.
Suddenly, the sick human felt a soft pain in his stomach, which turned into an unpleasant feeling, and began traveling upwards.
A soft “burp” came out. Catching him off guard.
“Should I call her…?”
“I don’t wanna bother her…”
“But if I throw up…”
“Dashieeee~!” He softly called out.
In an instant, Dash opened the door. “What’s wrong?”
There were times where Godson had forgotten his marefriend was as fast as Sonic the friggin Hedgehog. This was one of them.
“I think… *burp* I’m gonna throw up…” He groaned.
“I’ll go get a bucket!” Dash nodded, zipping off to find a bucket. Two seconds later, she returns with the bucket in her grasp, and giving it to the poor human as she sat him up.
Godson stared into the bucket, taking deep breaths and blowing, doing whatever he could to prevent him from vomiting.
At the same time, Dash sat next to him, rubbing his back in an attempt to relax him, as well as help him prevent throwing up.
Fortunately, it worked. He wasn’t sure exactly what helped him in the first place, but, the unpleasant feeling in his stomach went back down, and faded into nothingness.
“Whew…” He sighed. “False alarm…”
Suddenly, felt his marefriend wrap her hooves around his waist. He looked to his side, watching as the mare hugged him. Smiling, he wrapped his own arm around her, allowing her to rest her head on his chest.
“Why do you worry about me so much…?” He asked.
“Cause you’re so… fragile…”
“Fragile?”
“Yeah… You get hurt easily, you bruise easily... “ Dash nuzzled his chest. “If you fall off a couple of feet, you’d break a bone…” She sighed. “It takes a lot to hurt me. Or, ponies in general…” She looked up at him. “And I worry because… you’re so sweet and all… if something happened…”
“You make it sound like... *cough* I could die too easily…”
“You could!” Dash countered. “Ponies here are tougher than you are. Derpy got shocked once when she was bouncing on a cloud, and she’s perfectly fine! If it were you who got shocked like that…”
Godson saw the fear in her eyes, making him realize how weak and helpless he actually was compared to all the residents of Ponyville.
“So then… why are you dating someone so fragile?”
“Cause. If I don’t, who will?” Dash joked. “Nah… You’re just so… cute.”
“Cute?” Godson raised an eyebrow. “I’m not cute!”
“Yes you are.” Dash giggled. “You’re sweet, kind… kinda like Fluttershy.”
“Fluttershy?”
“Minus the shy part.” Dash added. “You just sometimes have your ‘moments’, and you need someone to set you straight. That’s what you have me for.”
“Don’t act like you don’t have your ‘moments’.” Godson huffed.
“And that’s why we have each other.” Dash finally concluded. “We need to set each other straight most of time, you’re always trying to keep me happy.”
“Mhm…”
“So it’s only fair if I return the favor by worrying so much.” She sighed softly, resting her head down on his chest once more.
Godson continued to sit in bed, his marefriend still holding him in her embrace. He let her words sink in, thinking them over as they shared this small moment together. He looked down at the cuddly mare, who seemed like she was never going to let go. Something he was totally fine with.
“Dashie?”
The mare looked up at him with her head askew.
“Have I ever told you how much I love you?”
“About a hundred times.” Dash chortled.
“Would you mind if I told you a hundred more times?” Godson asked curiously.
“Not at all…”
Dash returned to the bedroom once more, carrying a tray in hoof. She found the sick human sleeping in bed, it would’ve been a nice sight for her, had he not been sick to ruin the moment.
Despite not wanting to disturb him from his sleep, he needed to eat. He hadn’t eaten anything since he got up. She set the tray down on top of the drawer, moving the alarm clock and a few other small objects out of the way to make room.
She climbed up in bed and sat next to him. She softly placed her hoof on his forehead, checking for any fever. Fortunately, whatever fever he previously had was now gone, as he seemed to be at a normal temperature. She sighed a breath of relief, happy she wouldn’t have to take him to the hospital or anything.
She slowly lowered her head, softly pressing her lips against his forehead. After giving a soft kiss to her sleeping boyfriend, she grabbed him and shook him gently. “Godson…”
The human in front of her groaned quietly, and stirred around as she tried to wake him up. Soon enough, he opened his eyes, with her being the first thing he saw.
“Hey there, sleepyhead…” Dash spoke softly. “I brought you some soup…”
Godson hummed as he slowly sat up. “Thanks…”
Dash kissed his cheek. “No problem…” Getting out of bed, she grabbed the tray, and placed it on his lap. She watched at the human groggily ate the meal she brought.
Suddenly, there was a knock on the front door.
Dash’s ear twitched at the sound, she turned her head to where she heard the sound coming from, then looked back at her human. She walked out of the room, letting him eat while she checked who was at the door.
Upon opening it, she found Twilight standing right behind it.
“Oh, hey Rainbow.” Twilight spoke. “I came to check on Godson real quick.”
“He’s eating some soup at the moment…” Dash replied. “Why? Something wrong?”
“Remember the spell I used on him yesterday?”
“Uh… Yeah?”
“Well. As it turns out… There seems to be a side effect to long term exposure to the spell.”
“Side effect?” Dash tilted her head. “What kind of side effect…?”
“From what I could tell, from being exposed to that spell for that long may leave him with an upset stomach, possible fever, and normal common cold symptoms…”
“You’re a bit too late on that…” Dash rolled her eyes. “How long does it last?”
“Oh… I’d say about…” Twilight placed a hoof on her chin. “A couple days… four days, at the most.”
“And then you wonder why I don’t want you testing spells on him…” Dash sighed.
“It’s not like he would’ve died…”
“If he went too long without food or water, he would’ve.”
“Do you really think we’d take that long in finding him?”
“Anything could’ve happened, Twilight!” Dash attempted not to shout. “One wrong spell and his weak little body could be damaged. It’s not like zapping Pinkie Pie with a random spell and then undo it.” Dash shook her head. “For Godson, one mistake, and it could mean his life…”
“Then if he’s so fragile, why are you always slapping him around?”
“I slap him softly. Hard enough for him to feel a little pain, but not enough to knock him out.” Dash explained. “He may be fragile, but he’s not as breakable as a vase. He can take a little pain.”
“Fair enough.” Twilight nodded.
“Besides, if I don’t take care of him…” She looked at the bedroom door. “What kind of marefriend would I be to just let him screw himself up?”
“At least you’re caring for him.” Twilight smiled. “I’m sure he’s more than happy to have you for a marefriend.”
Dash looked at Twilight, seeing her bright smile, causing her to smile back. “Yeah… He is…”
“Well. You seem to have this under control. I’ll leave it to you to take care of him until he feels better.” Twilight said with a nod. “I’ll see you later, Rainbow Dash.”
“See ya…” Dash nodded back, watching as Twilight walked off. She slowly closed the door, and then thought about something, which had her open the door again.
“Hey, Twilight!” She shouted.
Twilight turned her head, indicating she was listening.
“Is whatever he has contagious?” Dash asked loudly.
“Not at all!” Twilight shook her head. “Feel free to cuddle, smooch, or whatever it is you two do alone!”
“...’Kay!”
Then she closed the door.
Walking back to the bedroom, she smiled, knowing Godson’s current illness was somewhat minor, and would go away on its own. He just needed someone to take care of him. As she entered the room, she grabbed the door.
“Lindaaa~!” She shouted. “Get over here!”
Sure enough, the familiar chihuahua ran as fast as her tiny paws could take her, until she made it to the room. Dash closed the door, and watched as the small dog hopped onto bed, and quickly ran under the blankets.
She looked up to the human, who was already laying back down.
“Finished your soup?” She asked.
“Yeah…” Godson answered softly. “I laid the tray on the floor. I’ll pick it up in a little bit…”
“Don’t worry about it…” Dash shook her head with a soft laugh. “You just get your rest. I’ll pick it up in a little bit.”
“Alright…” Godson sighed. “Who was at the door?”
“Twilight. She wanted to check on you.” Dash explained. “According to her, you’re dealing with a side-effect from the freezing spell she tested on you.”
“Is it bad?”
“Not really. It’ll last a few days, though. It’s not even contagious.” Dash climbed up in bed, covering herself in the blankets. “Nothing like a little bedrest and some TLC to help you get better until then…”
“Some TLC, huh?” Godson raised an eyebrow. “I like the the sound of that…”
“You should…” Dash snuggled close to him, wrapping her hooves around his chest. “I took the next couple of days off so I could take care of you.”
“When did you do that?”
“Before I started watching TV, I paid a quick visit to my job.”
“So that means I have you all to myself for the next few days?”
“Looks like it.” Dash leaned in for a quick peck. “And to be honest…” Her mouth gawked open as she yawned softly. “...I could use a little nap…”
“We both could…” Godson smiled mildly, wrapping his arms around the mare. He sighed contently as he cuddled with his marefriend. “A few extra hours of sleep wouldn’t hurt anyone, right?”
“Right…” Dash muttered, slowly drifting to sleep.
“I love you, Dashie.” He softly spoke, wrapping his legs around her rear legs, pulling her even closer in his embrace.
“I love you too, Godson…”
He leaned in for a small kiss, and then, they both drifted to sleep…
Author's Note
Shorter chapter than usual. But hey! A cute little romance chapter! Makes up for Dash's speediness in her relationship, right? ...Right?
In my defense, I believe Dash would be speedy with her relationships, as she is with almost everything in her life.

//-------------------------------------------------------//
                  Chapter 1-5: Date Night                  
//-------------------------------------------------------//
Chapter 1-5: Date Night
“A date?” Dash raised an eyebrow at the human’s request. “What’s this all about?”
“Aw, c’mon, Dash…” Godson frowned softly. “We’ve been official for two weeks now, and ever since I got better a week or so ago, we haven’t done anything together!”
“Yeah, I know. It’s just that I’ve been busy with work, and everything…” Dash replied.
“So then at least let me take you on a date.” Godson countered. “What better way to relax than with someone you love?”
“I don’t know…” Dash shook her head. “I want to get up early enough so I can get everything done faster…”
“Our date won’t even be that long!”
“Godson, it’s like 8 o’clock at night. What exactly are we gonna do at this time?” Dash queried.
“There’s a lot of things we could do!” Godson crossed his arms. “We could go eat out… Or go for a late night stroll around Ponyville… Or if none of those are good options for you, you could spend the night at my house! Just… anything that can get us to spend a little time together!”
“Godson, as much as I’d love to spend the night, who’s gonna take care of Tank?”
“You could just fly home real quick, grab him, and then fly right ba—”
“If I fly home, I’m going straight to sleep. I’m tired…”
Godson sighed. “Ever since I got better a week or two ago… We haven’t spent any time together…”
“I know... “ Dash’s ears flopped back, then slowly came back up to normal as she came up with an idea. “How about this, tomorrow I’ll feed Tank a little extra. Then after work, we’ll go out for a little walk around Ponyville, and maybe we’ll spend the rest of the night together. How’s that sound?”
Godson scratched the back of his head. “Yeah, I suppose that’ll work.”
“Great!” Dash leaped a little bit, using her wings to keep her up high enough to be face to face with him. With a soft kiss to the lips, she smiled. “See you tomorrow, then!”
Godson simply waved a hand. “See ya tomorrow!”
He slowly made his way back inside his house once his marefriend was far enough from his field of view. He stepped into his bedroom, and surveyed the contents of his room. From the time he’s spent in Equestria so far, he just now realized how barren his room seemed to be. The only noticeable things in his room were his bed, a dresser holding an alarm clock and a lamp on top, and his closet door a few feet away from his bed.
Everything else just seemed empty.
“I… should probably start decorating this room more…” Godson muttered to himself. Shrugging it off, he walked to his bed, where his dog already awaited him before she could sleep peacefully. He got into bed, covering himself with the blankets, and drifted off to sleep.
As Godson walked back home from another day of work. He looked around his surroundings, ponies casually treated the human as if he was one of their own, at this point, despite him being taller than everyone.
Once he was at his house, he noticed a note stuck onto his door.
“Godson, I might be a tiny bit late, there’s a soft storm we have scheduled in a few days, and we’re getting most of our clouds ready ahead of time. So don’t just sit there and bore yourself to death until I get back. I’ll find you whenever I’m done. ~Dash”
With a roll of the eyes, Godson looked up to see if he could see his marefriend doing anything with the weather above him. Unfortunately, he saw nothing but a clear sky, not a single cloud in sight.
Knowing his date would be delayed by what Dash claims to be “a tiny bit late”, he contemplated on what he could do to kill time until his marefriend returned.
Well. He could always visit Applejack… But after the whole “f—buck a tree” incident, he’d rather not.
Rarity seemed like another decent choice, and then remembered the pink “I <3 Ponyville” shirt he was forced to wear until she made more suitable clothes. And he'd rather not go through something like that again.
He could always visit Pinkie—
Fluttershy probably wouldn’t mind the visit...but would her animals?
“Welp. Guess I’m visiting Twilight.”
Being only a short distance away from the alicorn’s home, he took the initiative and mentally set a course to her library-home. Wasting little energy to run over to the Golden Oaks Library, he proceeded to knock on the door, only to hear a soft “it’s open!” from inside. With a shrug, he opened the door, making his next few steps into the treehouse.
Twilight looked over to the door behind her, upon realizing who her visitor was, she closed a book she had levitating in front of her.
“Godson?” Twilight cocked her head to the side. “What brings you here?”
“Well. Boredom, mostly.”
“Do you wanna test a spe—”
“After the whole thing with Lyra? Yeah, no...”
“Fine…” Twilight rolled her eyes. “So then, what’s the problem?”
“I told you already, I’m just bored.” Godson shrugged. “Dash is still caught up at work, so I came to see what you were up to. Maybe you were doing something interesting that could calm my boredom for a while.”
Twilight raised an eyebrow. “So, you’re looking into something that’ll end your boredom, eh?” Her horn suddenly began to glow with its familiar purple aura, casting a levitation spell on the book she had just previously closed. Once the book was in front of her, it opened up to the page she had been working on. “Well, perhaps you could help me figure out this spell…”
“What’s it do?”
“Well. It’s a work in progress, but in theory, it should allow the caster to transform his-or-herself, or any other willing subject into any being. Of course, there are a few exceptions and limitations of the spell, but they’re not that important.”
Godson placed a thinking hand on his chin. “Sounds interesting. Mind if I take a look?”
Twilight nodded, and the book floated over and spun around for Godson to get a better view of the pages.
Godson grabbed his glasses from his face, folding one arm, and folding the other one at the neck of his shirt, allowing it to hang from there. He slowly reached his arms over to the book to grab it.
“Don’t touch the book. Just look at it.” Twilight interrupted.
He looked at the alicorn, and blinked. Raising an eyebrow, his hands fell back down to their normal position, and he leaned over slightly to get a better look at the book. Examining the page, he could see a lot of foreign symbols, jumbled letters, and, strangely, some math.
“There’s this one equation that’s bugging me. It’s supposed to fit with all the spell’s parts, but it just… doesn’t.” Twilight groaned. “Maybe you could figure it ou—”
“Ew, math.” Godson looked up to the alicorn. “Sorry, can’t really help ya there.”
“Oh.” Twilight blinked. “I didn’t know you weren’t good at math.”
“It’s not that I’m not good at it. It’s just that I don’t like doing it.” Godson shook his head.
Twilight narrowed her eyes. “Right…”
Godson shrugged, grabbing his glasses from his shirt, and placed them back where they belong. “So, speaking of magic… Is there a way to not get completely screwed over by it?”
Twilight tilted her head. “What do you mean?”
“Well, I mean, like… is there a way to avoid, or… resist the effects of spells?”
“Depends on the spell being used.” Twilight replied. “You gotta be more specific.”
“What about the truth spell, for example?”
“Ah. Yes, there are a few spells like the truth spell, in which their effects can be blocked. But you have to have a constant exposure to the spell, and train your body to ignore it. And even then, some of those spells have a ‘higher version’ that can be applied. So it’s not even a guarantee you’ll even be able to handle those.” Twilight explained. “And even that, something like that has only been examined with ponies, I’m not 100% sure if other creatures, such as yourself, could do the same.”
“Do you think you could try and help me?” Godson raised an eyebrow.
“What for?”
“Well. You girls are always saving Equestria from nearly everything. If I were to get in the middle of it, say, perhaps I was kidnapped, and the kidnapper knew how to use magic, I’d be screwed.” Godson crossed his arms. “They could literally just zap any information out of me.”
Twilight scoffed. “We’d get you out of there before they even dare try.”
“And what if you can’t?” Godson queried. “What if you girls had to focus on something more important than saving me? Or if you would get there just a little late? Anything can happen, Twilight.”
“...I suppose so…”
“So, could you help me?”
Twilight thought on the human’s request for a moment, then slowly nodded. “Yeah. I’ll help.”
“Great, I’ll come by everyday after work, and we can work on that?”
“Sure, that’ll work.” Twilight nodded once more.
“Cool.” Godson nodded back. “Uh, also, could we keep this between us?”
“Why?”
“Well. If something were to happen to me…” Godson began. “You’d all know I’d be fine for a little while since I’ll have had training to hold on for long enough for you girls to come and get me. So you wouldn’t worry.”
“Isn’t that the whole point?”
“That’s the thing, if whoever it is sees you’re not worried for me, then they’ll have no use for me, and just… er…”
“So you want us to actually worry, that way they’ll be focused on getting whatever they need out of you long enough for us to come get you again…”
“Exactly…”
Twilight nodded in agreement. “That’ll work, actually. It actually could help serve as a distraction if we ever need one.”
“See? It’s a win-win!”
“Alright, Godson. You have a deal.”
Godson casually waited at home. It had been 30 minutes since he found the note at his door, and since then it’s gotten surprisingly colder outside. In fact, it was cold enough to the point where the human felt like he needed to wear a jacket. In reality, it wasn’t even all that cold, but regardless the human still wore the jacket, keeping himself warm from whatever cold he felt.
He slowly began petting his dog, whom sat on his lap, as he rested on the couch. He wondered when his marefriend would arrive, but soon enough, he heard a knocking on his door. He removed Linda off his lap, stood up from where he sat, and walked over to the door. With a twist of the knob, he pulled the door open, and was greeted by his marefriend, smiling softly as she stood outside.
“Sorry I’m a little late…” Dash teased. “I’m guessing you read the note I left?”
“Mhm.” Godson nodded. “I read it. You took a little longer than a tiny bit.”
Dash chuckled softly. “I know, I was expecting to be there only for a good ten, maybe fifteen minutes. But they kept taking forever…”
“And I assume this cold temperature is your doing?”
Dash shook her head. “Pegasi control weather, not temperature.”
“Isn’t they the same thing?”
“Nope.” Dash shook her head once more. “I assume that’s why you’re wearing that jacket?”
“Uh. Maybe…” Godson smiled sheepishly.
Dash chuckled softly, then shivered at the cold breeze that had suddenly rushed to her. “Yeah, I see what you mean. It’s getting colder even as we speak… I might have to fly real quick to my house and grab a sweater or something…”
“You sure?” Godson raised an eyebrow. “What if there was another way of staying warm?”
“And that is...?” Dash cocked her head to the side.
“We... could share my jacket...”
“Uh.” Dash blinked. “Godson. I’m no expert or anything, but… I don’t see how the both of us can share a jacket…”
Godson shrugged. “Easy.” He kneeled over, and grabbed his marefriend, pulling her close for a kiss. Having been caught off guard, Dash simply hummed softly in curiosity, but then quickly shrugged it off as she wrapped her hooves around the human, closed her eyes, and pushed back into the kiss.
She could hear a soft zip, but she paid no mind to it, and focused on the matter at hoof.
Once the human’s plan was through, he slowly pulled back, leaving the mare in her dreamy state. As she slowly opened her eyes, she saw her lover’s face, looking back at her with a smile. One thing she noticed, was that she was significantly warmer than she was earlier. When she looked around, she noticed she was also higher up, realizing the human was now standing, with her still in his embrace. She then looked at the jacket the human was wearing, and how it seemed to stretch at a certain point. She turned her head more, as far as her side, and realized she was now also being covered by his jacket.
“So. This is how you plan on sharing your jacket?” Dash raised an eyebrow. “You’re gonna stretch out your jacket, and then Rarity’s gonna kill you.”
“Nah, I have a spare jacket in the closet.” Godson smirked softly. “This can be our jacket, now.”
Dash looked up at the human, her face slowly starting to grin slyly. “So, what is it that you plan on doing today, Godson?”
“Hm… Maybe we’ll go for a walk around the park, watch a movie, and maybe…” He slowly leaned his head closer, pressing his lips softly against hers, then pulled back in an attempt to tease the mare trapped in his jacket. “...you could spend the night with me?”
“Maybe…” Dash’s smile slowly grew larger. “I just hope you’re fine with me bringing Tank over.”
“Sure, I don’t mind.” Godson shrugged. “We’ll stop by on our little walk.”
“Great!” Dash cheered. “Now, uh, could you let go of me? I don’t, uh, wanna be seen like this out in the public.”
“Hm?” Godson hummed softly, walking out the door to his house. “No can do, Dashie.”
“What?” Dash raised an eyebrow. “Godson, I have an image to maintain! I can’t be seen as a big, soft, sap!”
“You’ll still have your image, Dash.” Godson rolled his eyes. “They’ll just see that you also have a soft spot.”
Dash quickly tried to escape from the human’s trap, using any movement she could make in an attempt to get out of the jacket.
“Nnnn~! Godson! Let me go!”
“Stop squirming, Dash…” Godson muttered softly. “You’ll draw attention, and then they’ll think I’m foal-napping you or something…”
After enough struggling, and the human’s warning, she stopped, and accepted the fact that she wouldn’t be able to escape. She looked around, noticing that they were already a little far from her boyfriend’s home. She continued looking around her surroundings as they passed by a few shops, restaurants. Luckily for her, no one seemed to notice she was even being held by the human in the first place.
She slowly started to feel a little more comfortable being held like this. She sighed blissfully, letting herself relax as her human carried her around, and rested her head on his shoulder.
The human looked down at the soothed mare, pausing his walk. He reached a hand over to her, and caressed her head softly, earning a soft hum of approval. She lifted her head, and looked back at him with a soft smile. Noticing how relaxed the mare was, he brought his lips closer to hers, and slowly kissed her. While Godson was aware of where he was standing, it seemed as if Rainbow had completely forgotten they were out walking. As she lovingly hummed as she felt his lips caress against hers.
As the two kissed, other ponies that passed by would either stop to see why the human was standing still, and see the two of them, only to just stand and stare. Others would simply pass by, not caring whatever it was the human was doing. And others would pass by and notice the both of them, walking away with soft “awws”.
The two slowly pulled apart, smiling softly over their display of affection. However, their smiles were cut short, as Dash immediately remembered the fact they were in public. She quickly looked around, seeing the few who stayed to stare. Her face quickly began to turn into a bright shade of red, which seemed to be enough for them to walk back and continue their own walks.
“This is exactly what I’ve been trying to avoid…” Dash whispered with a groan.
“Yet you revel in all the attention when we’re alone…” Godson whispered back. “You know you love it when I give you all this attention.”
“...Maybe…”
Godson chuckled. “We’ve been together for two weeks, and look at us.”
“We’re freakin’ crazy.” Dash chided.
“Crazy in love, maybe.” Godson snickered.
“Shut up.” Dash buried her muzzle in his neck, hiding the mad blush returning to her face.
Godson simply let her, and continued their walk. The rest of the walk was mostly silent, Dash had kept herself hiding, hoping she wouldn’t get noticed. By the time they had reached the park, they’d come across more ponies that would “aww” as the couple passed by. Every now and then there was also the occasional “is that Rainbow Dash?”, but they were usually too far away for them to fully see the two, and they were so few compared to everyone else that they passed by.
By the time Godson decided he was done walking, he made his way over to Dash’s house.
“Dashie…” He patted her head softly. “We’re here.”
Dash slowly lifted her head up, looking up at the human. She looked around, slowly recognizing the area, then looked up to see her home up in the sky.
“Uh… Could you let me go…?”
“Oh, right.” Godson nodded, grabbing the zipper to his jacket, and pulling it down enough for his marefriend to be able to move.
Once she was able to stretch her wings, she flew up to her house, leaving him to wait outside.
He zipped up his jacket once more, knowing he wouldn’t be able to pull the same trick again. After a few minutes, he could hear the door close. Dash flew back down to the ground, with her turtle, who also flew with her thanks to his magic helicopter rotor.
“‘Kay, let’s go.” Dash said. “It’s freakin’ cold out here, the sooner we get back, the sooner I can wrap myself in some blankets…”
Godson nodded, and swiftly began making his walk back home.
“Actually, Godson…?”
He stopped in his tracks, and turned around.
“...Is there still room for me in that jacket?”
“I can’t believe the movie ended like that! That’s not at all how I expected it to go!” Dash walked into the bedroom.
“I know, right?” Godson replied, walking in behind her. “Bah, it wasn’t that bad of an ending, though.”
“They literally left it at that cliffhanger just so they could make a sequel!” Dash countered.
“Then that makes more of a reason for us to go to the theaters later on.” Godson shrugged, jumping right into bed and covering himself. “Anyway, thanks for spending the night, Dash.”
“Are you kidding?” Dash raised an eyebrow, getting into bed as well. “This place would be empty without me!”
“Well. If it’s so empty without you, maybe you should move in with me.” Godson joked.
Dash slowly went wide-eyed. “...Are you asking me to move in with you?”
“Huh?” Godson raised an eyebrow, only to quickly shrug. “I was just joking. I mean, if you want to…”
“Oh.” Dash reverted back to normal. “Okay, yeah.”
“Alright. Well.” Godson attempted to stifle a yawn. “G’night, Dashie…”
“Night, Godson…”
The two slowly closed their eyes, and attempted to drift to sleep. Dash, however, seemed to have a little difficulty trying to sleep. She shivered slightly at the cold, which only made her attempt to cover herself more with the blankets, but unfortunately, her attempts to do so were futile.
“...Godson?”
“Hm…?”
“...C-could we...cuddle, just a bit?” Dash asked softly. “...I’m cold…”
Godson slowly spun around to face the mare, then opened his arms wide enough for her to scoot over to. Once she got close enough, he wrapped his arms around her, feeling the warmth of her body against his.
Now that she was warmer, the mare attempted to go to sleep. But yet, there was still something on her mind.
“...Godson…?”
“Yes, Dashie?”
“...About that ‘move in’ offer…”

//-------------------------------------------------------//
              Chapter 1-6: A Celestial Visit               
//-------------------------------------------------------//
Chapter 1-6: A Celestial Visit
Godson groaned softly, carrying yet another box of his marefriend’s stuff into his own home. What was first a simple joke to him, turned into a fully fledged plan for the both of them.
They had now been official for a month now, and already they agreed on moving in together.
“Y'know, Dash…” Godson spoke. “When they said you were the fastest mare in Equestria, I didn't think that applied to relationships…”
“I know.” Dash replied. “I'm not exactly the greatest when it comes to things like… well, dating.”
“You're not exactly the best at being patient, either.”
“Hey!” Dash retorted.
“Luckily you have someone equally as impatient as you are.” Godson winked at the now annoyed mare.
“Hmph.” Dash huffed.
“Relax, Dash.” Godson chuckled. “I’m just teasing you. Sure, we’ve been together a month now, but I’m glad to have you at the house with me! You never have to worry about leaving tank alone, we have more time to spend together… So far, I’m only seeing pros, and no cons.”
“Yeah.” Dash nodded. “Besides, it starts to get lonely sleeping at my own house knowing I could just spend the night with you…”
“Actually, you moving in might help me a bit.” Godson added.
“How so?” Dash raised an eyebrow.
“I’m pretty sure you’ve noticed by now that my bedroom’s almost barren.” Godson pointed out. “Y’know, with all the times you’ve been in there...”
“Ha, ha…” Dash narrowed her eyes. “Very funny.”
“What?” Godson raised an eyebrow. “I didn’t mean it like that. Geez, you’re so dirty minded sometimes.”
“Me!?” Dash gawked. “What about you!?”
“What about m—”
“Every time we pass by any cylindrical object you see in any store you ask if I’d like to try it!”
“And does it bother you?”
“Just a little bit…”
“That means it’s working.” Godson chided.
Dash sighed softly. “You’re telling me you’ve been doing it all this time just to bother me?”
Godson paused for a moment, thinking of the most appropriate response. “Kinda.”
Dash chuckled. “You’re a jerk, you know that?”
“Alright, fine. I won't do it anymore…”
“Thank youuu~.”
Eventually, they arrive to the human’s house. Dash opened the door, allowing him to enter first. As she waited for him to enter, she heard a whooshing sound above her. She looked up quickly, and saw a familiar carriage carrying a large mare to somewhere in Ponyville.
“Hey…” She spoke up. “What’s Celestia doing here in Ponyville…?”
“Hm?” Godson mumbled from afar, lightly putting the box down to go see what she was talking about. She pointed up to the carriage as it flew by.
“Huh. I’m… not sure, Dash.” He stated. “Maybe she’s visiting Twilight?”
“Maybe.” Dash shrugged. “Should we go check it out, later?”
“Yeah, I guess…”
They shortly made their way to Twilight’s library, once they were close enough they could hear the two princesses talking about something.
“Godson.” Dash pulled him, stopping him in his tracks. “I hear them talking… I don’t think it’s a good idea right now to be interrupting.”
“Pfft.” Godson scoffed. “And miss out on a chance to meet Celestia after the whole ‘Take Over Equestria’ incident? No thanks.”
“But—”
Before Dash could even finish her sentence, Godson opened the door slowly, making his way inside the library.
“Well… I suppose that explains your visit…” Twilight sheepishly smiled.
“AYYY!” Godson shouted. “IT’S FREAKING CELESTIA!”
Celestia turned her head around quickly, nearly ready to attack the sudden intruder. But then paused as soon as she was able to make out who it was.
“The beast is back…?” Celestia muttered, turning her head back over to Twilight. “You never mentioned the beast returned…”
“Oh. You mean Godson?” Twilight raised an eyebrow. “I thought I mentioned him in one of my letters…?”
“Oh. Right.” Godson chuckled sheepishly. “About that…”
“What’d you do, Godson…” Twilight rolled her eyes, and quickly narrowed them soon after.
“I… uh, kinda made a deal with Spike not to have any mention of me anywhere in your letters.” He responded with a sheepish smile.
“What exactly did he get in return?”
“Uh…” Godson scratched the back of his neck. “...Romance tips?”
“Huh.” Twilight blinked. “That explains his frequent visits to Rarity’s boutique recently…”
“Yep.” Godson nodded. “Pretty much…”
“And… what exactly did you gain by doing so?” Celestia tilted her head to the side.
“The ability to scare the total crap out of you by shouting ‘AYYY, IT’S FREAKING CELESTIA’.” Godson deadpanned.
The two alicorns sighed over the human’s response.
“So what are you doing here anyway?” Godson asked curiously.
“I felt a large amount of magical disturban—”
“I blame Twilight.”
“What!?” Twilight exclaimed. “What did I do!?”
“Screw something up?” Godson shrugged. “I dunno, considering you left me frozen for nearly the whole day, I’m just gonna blame you for whatever magical disturbance Celestia felt.”
“And who’s fault was that for you being frozen?”
“Yours.” Godson rolled his eyes.
“...Oh right…”
“So, I guess you fixed the magical disturbance?” Godson looked up to the larger mare.
“...For the most part, yes.” Celestia nodded.
“Great.” Godson nodded back. “...That’s cool…” Soon after, a wave of awkward silence flooded the room. Even Dash, who was still standing outside, had no idea what to say next to end the silence.
Then, Godson spoke up once more. “So… how’s Luna? You two still making rigged bets?”
Celestia laughed softly. “Sometimes.”
“How many bets have you two made since the last time we’ve met?”
“Oh… about twenty-one times?” Celestia guessed. “I think that’s about right.”
“Heh. That’s kinda funny, actually.” Godson commented.
“What about you? If I recall correctly, you were dared to take over Equestria.” Celestia pointed out. “How’d that turn out with your friends?”
“Well. He didn’t believe me at first. But let’s just say he owes me some money, now…” Godson explained.
“So, what brings you back to Equestria, then?” Celestia raised an eyebrow. “Planning to finish some large dare again?”
“Actually… I’ve been stuck here for about… four and a half months? Yeah, seems about right.”
“Oh?”
“I blame Twilight.”
“Of course you do…” Twilight rolled her eyes.
“I assume she’s been helping you find a way back home, then?” Celestia inquired.
“You assume wrong, Celestia.” Godson shook his head. “Actually, I told her to just forget about it. I’ve actually made a living here in Equestria, now.”
“Is that so?” Celestia cocked her head to the side.
“Yeah.” Godson nodded. “In fact, I’ve even been dating somepony.”
“Allow me to guess…” Celestia narrowed her eyes. “Despite all the blaming, you’re dating Twilight?”
“What!?” The two shouted in shock.
As they were about to argue, Celestia simply laughed at their reaction. “Relax, I’m only teasing.” Despite her laughing, she soon focused on another thought. “Although, I’m surprised to hear somepony has taken an interest in you.”
“...Is that an insult?” Godson raised an eyebrow.
“It could be…” Celestia smirked softly.
Godson scratched the back of his head. “I’m… not sure how to feel about that.”
“In all seriousness, however.” Celestia placed a thinking hoof on her chin. “A human-pony couple is something I wasn’t expecting to hear from you, especially after finding out you’ve been here for so long without my knowledge…”
“Is there a problem with that?”
“Not at all.” Celestia shook her head. “If anything, you’ve earned my respect.”
“Huh?”
Celestia nodded. “You were able to spend four and a half months in Equestria without any mention of you at all to me. That has to be worth something.”
“So basically you’re calling me a ninja?”
“...No?” Celestia spoke. “That’s not at all what I was saying…”
“Oh.” Godson blinked. “Wait. Then, what were you saying?”
“I’m saying you went through all this trouble of making sure I wouldn’t know you were here, waited for me to arrive here one day, just to scare the daylights out of me.”
“...And?”
“...That was quite an excellent prank.” Celestia giggled.
“...What?” Twilight and Godson blinked dumbfoundedly.
“I’ve pulled so many pranks on Luna before, and they were nothing as large scaled as yours.” Celestia pointed out.
“Where are you going with this, Celestia?” Godson crossed his arms.
“...I may require your assistance in pranking Luna.”
“So… let me just catch up on what just happened…” Dash spoke slowly. “Princess Celestia... wants you… to help her prank Princess Luna tomorrow? Did I hear her right?”
“I’m having a hard time believing it myself…” Godson replied. “But… yeah, I think so…”
“Huh…” Dash blinked. “That’s… actually pretty funny.”
“It’s also a bit nerve-wracking…” Godson sighed. “Now I’m expected not to fail in front of Celestia.”
“Oh, please.” Dash rolled her eyes. “If you can handle not being noticed by Celestia for four and a half months, I’m pretty sure you can easily do the same to Luna.”
“Are you implying I’m not important enough to not—”
“No I’m not!” Dash interrupted. “I’m saying that you were able to avoid any mention of you ever to Celestia for four and a half months, I don’t know how you did it, and I really don’t care how to be honest. But you did it. I’m pretty sure you can just as easily stay out of Luna’s radar for however long you and Celestia plan for.”
“Are you impl—”
“No!”
“Did that bother you?”
“Very much so!”
“That means it worked.”
“GODSON, YOU IDIOT!”

//-------------------------------------------------------//
                Chapter 1-7: A Lunar Prank                 
//-------------------------------------------------------//
Chapter 1-7: A Lunar Prank
“Why did I ever think this was a good idea?” Godson thought to himself. Holding back a groan as he and Celestia rode her carriage back to Canterlot.
The only problem was, since there was no room for him, and Celestia wanted to sneak him into Canterlot without anypony noticing, even her own royal guard, so she came up with an idea.
She’d magically glue him to the bottom of the carriage.
And she did.
As the carriage finally made it’s way back in front of the castle, it slowly set a collision course back to the ground, something that frightened the human.
“I swear to God if the bottom of this carriage hits or even scrapes into something, I’m gonna go to Equestrian jail for assassinating Celestia.” Godson thought. “...Does Equestria even have a jail? Oh wait, that’s tartarus. No, wait... that’s their equivalent of hell…”
Fortunately for him, as he was having a nice, pleasant conversation with the back of his mind, the human had soon zoned out to the point where he didn’t even realize they had already landed.
“Would you like us to accompany you back to the castle, Princess?” asked the Guards.
“No, I’m sure I’ll be fine on my own.”
“As you wish.”
Godson snapped out of his daze, his view instantly blocked by the ground mere inches below him. He could hear hoofsteps slowly fade away as they got farther and farther away, until eventually, they had left entirely.
Suddenly, he felt an odd feeling in his body, and in a matter of seconds, he began to obey the laws of gravity once more, and fall back onto the ground.
Raising his head slowly, and just enough to avoid contact with the carriage above him, he noticed said carriage moving forwards, until it no longer covered him anymore.
“I still don’t understand why you had to glue me to the carriage” Godson whined.
“Well, there wasn’t exactly enough room for you to fit up here…” Celestia rolled her eyes. “And I needed some way of bringing you here without the guards noticing. Plus, it was funny seeing you freak out while you were stuck to the bottom of the carriage…”
“If you weren’t a Princess, and, y’know, didn’t control the sun… You’d so be dead right now…” Godson grumbled, slowly standing up.
“Mhm.” Celestia nodded. “Sure.”
“So what exactly do you have planned for this ‘massive prank’, anyway?” Godson impatiently raised an eyebrow.
“Um, right…” Celestia placed a hoof on her chin. “I was thinking we could do something similar to what you did to me…”
“You mean like when I scared the daylights out of you?” Godson crossed his arms. “So, what, I’m gonna scare the moonlights out of her?” He quickly shook his head. “No, that’s too basic.”
“Oh, and I suppose you have something better?” Celestia raised an eyebrow.
“When you’re dating someone who pranks a crapton, you tend to pick up on a few things…” Godson shrugged.
“Speaking of your love life…” Celestia cut in. “...You never exactly mentioned who exactly you’re with…”
“That doesn’t matter right now.” Godson shook his head once more. “What does matter, however, is this prank needs to be just as large scaled as not ever being mentioned to you in the four and a half months I’ve lived in Equestria.”
“Alright then.” Celestia nodded. “Let’s hear it. Let’s hear this large scaled prank you have planned.”
“I…” Godson uttered, quickly trying to find an idea to throw before he’d look like an idiot, but ultimately failed. “...uh… don’t exactly have anything planned at this very second…”
“Uh-huh.” Celestia nodded slowly. “I thought as much. So unless you come up with an ide—”
“I got it!” Godson interrupted.
“So quick?” Celestia jerked her head back. “I thought it would’ve took you longer than that…”
“Eh. I’m known for having random ideas at the most random times.” Godson shrugged. “How do you think I managed to get the Elements of Harmony so easily in an attempt to take over Equestria?” He raised an eyebrow. “Or do you not remember that incident?”
“Oh, I remember it clearly.” Celestia smirked. “I also remember you running like a filly as the girls nearly blasted you with them.”
“I’m still not entirely sure how I lived through that…” Godson scratched the back of his neck. He soon heard a soft laugh from the alicorn mare in front of him, and quickly shrugged it off.
“Anyway.” He shook his head. “I like where you went with the whole ‘scaring Luna’, thing, but I don’t think it’s enough.”
“How so?”
“How about something like, you turn me invisible for a bit so the guards don’t see me, and just stuff me in some room, and then you lure Luna into that room, and then I scare her.” Godson thought aloud.
“...That’s it?” Celestia blinked. “That’s your large scale prank?”
“What?” Godson crossed his arms. “It’s the best I could do on such short notice…”
“If we’re gonna going to make this a large scale thing, it needs to be big. Like, ‘stealing her crown’ big.” Celestia pointed out.
“That might work, actually.” Godson commented.
“Allow me to guess, you have another idea?”
“Well, you’ve inspired me. What can I say?” Godson shrugged. “I think I’ve finally got it now.”
“Let’s hear it.”
“You turn me invisible, stuff me a room, et cetera, et cetera.” Godson rolled his eyes. “That part’s still the same, but. You talk to Luna about how your trip to Ponyville was, or, something… I don’t really care.” He made a vague gesture with his hands. “And then as you leave the room, you turn invisible, and you float Luna’s crown all the way to my room. She’ll be chasing it all the way to me, and when she opens the door I’ll just be sitting back on a chair, wearing her crown, and just being chill about everything.”
“That’s…” Celestia spoke softly. “...Actually a great idea! I can imagine the look on her face, already. Beast, that’s the most—”
“I’m also going to need a banana.”
“What?”
“A banana.” Godson deadpanned. “Do you not have those in this world?”
“We do…” Celestia nodded. “But… what difference will that ma—”
“I neeeed. A banaaaaana.”
“Bu—”
“CELESTIA DON’T QUESTION MY LOGIC AND JUST GIVE ME MY BANANA!
Luna sat down on her throne, groaning softly at the lack of events happening recently. Besides Celestia taking a visit to Ponyville over some “magical disturbance”, almost nothing significant happened. It was almost as boring compared to eight and a half months ago, when that “beast” arrived, and they helped him in completing a dare against his friends.
She could only wonder where he is now, and what’s happened to him since then.
He made things entertaining, even if it was for about a day.
“I’m baaaaack!” Celestia said in a sing-song voice. “Anything interesting happen while I was gone, Luna?”
Luna shook her head. “Absolutely nothing, Sister. I had hoped something would happen in your absence, but to my avail, it was yet another day of sitting on the throne, doing nothing.”
“What about Discord?” Celestia raised an eyebrow. “Couldn’t you have just called him to help make something happen?”
“While a great idea, Sister, I’ve already tried that.”
“And?”
“He made a chocolate rain cloud, and then left.” Luna rolled her eyes with a groan.
“Ah.” Celestia nodded. “Well, my trip to Ponyville wasn’t as exciting as a chocolate rain cloud, but at least Twilight was telling me about a few things she discovered.”
“I assume that’s why you spent the night?”
“Mostly.” Celestia shrugged. “She was telling me about a portal spell she came up with.”
“And how useful did it prove to be?”
“Not very much.” Celestia shook her head. “The portal only seems to be a one way trip.”
“Well, couldn’t you just reca—”
“From the opposite side.”
“Yep.” Luna deadpanned. “That’s useless.”
“Mhm.” Celestia nodded. “Told you.”
“Well.” Luna leaned back on her throne. “I suppose it’s just gonna be another one of those days…”
“I don’t suppose you’re planning another bet just to keep this entertaining, are you?”
“Hm?” Luna raised an eyebrow, then shook her head. “Not today, Sister. Last time I relied on Discord to help me, I don’t think he’d help me out this time.”
“Alright then.” Celestia nodded. “In that case, I’ll just be checking on a few things.”
“That’s fine.” Luna made a shooing gesture with her hoof. “I’ll be here...doing nothing...”
Celestia rolled her eyes at her younger sister’s boredom, and turned around, making her way out the room.
Luna sighed, laying back as she closed her eyes in an attempt to sleep the day away.
Unfortunately, she was unable to do so, as the minute she had closed her eyes, she suddenly felt her crown seem to float away from her head. She looked up, seeing the flying crown above her head, raising an eyebrow, she grabbed it, and placed it back onto her head.
However, it didn’t help at all.
The crown floated away from her head once more, this time, moving away from her.
“What is this foolishness? Crown, get back here at once!” Luna shouted angrily.
Though despite her loud commands. The crown did the complete opposite, and flew away, leaving the room entirely.
At first, she was confused, but then she quickly picked up on what was going on, and chuckled. “Sister…” She walked up to the exit of the room, getting ready to look out to see her sister sitting somewhere, most likely laughing. “If this is another one of your pranks…”
She peeked her head out, looking around, instead of seeing her sister, she saw the crown continuing its trip to who-knows-where.
“Hey! Where do you think you’re going?!” She exclaimed, running towards the crown in a futile attempt to catch the crown. The closer she got, the farther the crown got, every turn it made, she made as well. Eventually though, the crown finally reached a dead end, all that was left was a door and the speeding alicorn rushing towards it.
Determined, Luna maintained her speed, running as fast as she could to grab the crown before it had a chance to react, once she felt she was close enough, she made a leap of faith to grab it while it was still in the air.
Unfortunately, before Luna could even touch it, the crown vanished in a white light, causing her to crash into the door. With a huff, she got up, growling at what might be behind the door.
“Whatever it is you are, I will make sure you learn your lesson…” Luna spoke through her growl, her horn lighting up intensely, as well as placing a hoof on the doorknob, and using all her energy to nearly throw the door open. “for messing with a princess—!” Luna shouted, quickly interrupting herself at the odd sight before her. “...huh?”
That odd sight, was Godson. Casually sitting back on a chair, one leg crossed over the other, as well as her forsakened crown atop his head, while also holding a banana in his hand, ready for peeling.
“Hiya, Moonbutt!” Godson smiled, peeling the banana. “How’s it goin’?” He quickly took a bite, completely careless over the alicorn’s anger.
Luna was completely dumbfounded, trying to process the completely casual look in his face as he ate the banana right in front of her. “W-Wha…?” She stammered. “Beast…? You’ve retur—”
“Shhhhhh…” Godson interrupted. “Let me finish my banana.” He held a finger up with his right hand, signaling her to wait, while he took another bite of the banana on his other hand.
“H-How is this possib—”
“LET ME FINISH MY BANANA!” Godson shouted, completely careless over the fact that he was yelling at a princess.
Luna gave the most dumbfounded look ever, giving up on trying to process his casualness, but now simply trying to process the entire situation altogether.
Godson threw the final piece of the banana into his mouth, still holding his finger up as he chewed, and ultimately, swallowed the banana.
He pointed at her, more importantly, her face, and spoke. “Is that the face you were imagining, Celestia?” He instantly broke into a fit of laughter. “Because that’s perfect!”
Before Luna can even utter a word, she heard a loud thump. She looked to her right, and suddenly noticed her older sister, quickly fading back into reality as she had fallen on her side, failing to control her own laughter.
“That was amazing!” Celestia breathed. “I don’t know how you kept that act going, but that was Grade-A perfect!”
Luna jerked her head back, her eyes widening as she watched the two laugh like maniacs.
“H-Huh!?” She dumbfoundedly spoke. “How is it that you’ve returned!?”
Godson attempted to stifle his laughter enough to get a few words out. “Let’s just say Twilight’s portal spell isn’t as useless as you think it is.”
If it were possible, Luna’s eyes would be the size of basketballs, but unfortunately the laughing duo weren’t graced to be able to see such a sight. “Celestia brought you back just for a prank!?”
“Heh.” Godson’s laughter died down, while Celestia still kept laughing as much as a hyena. “Nah. I would be pissed at her if she did. You can blame her student, though.”
“Twilight brought you back?”
“Yep. Can we make that a hashtag? Hashtag blame Twilight?” Godson placed a thinking hand on his chin. “I feel that would be so appropriate right now...”
“Wha—”
“Don’t ask what it is, because I’m not in the mood for explaining things from my world.”
Eventually, Celestia’s laughter finally died down, and she stood up once more. “Oh, geez. That was hilarious… I owe you. This has been the most hilarious thing I’ve been a part of in a long time.”
Godson raised an eyebrow. “Woah, I wasn’t expecting you to owe me anything… I was just doing this just because I could.”
“So you’re saying you don—”
“I’LL GLADLY TAKE YOUR PAYMENTS!
“That’s what I thought.” Celestia giggled, trying not to burst into laughter again.
“Besides…” Godson shrugged. “Four and a half months of being in Equestria and working for Pinkie for most of that time, I could probably use a vacation with my marefriend.”
“Deal.” Celestia winked.
“FOUR AND A HALF MONTHS!?” Luna gawked in shock, causing her sister to begin laughing once more, although not enough to have her fall on the floor.
“Welp.” Godson stood from his chair, placing Luna’s crown back onto her head. “My work here is done.” He quickly made his way out the room. “I’ll be waiting outside so you can take me back home, Celestia.”
Celestia nodded, her laughter slowly dying down once again, as Luna continued to dumbfoundedly stare at the human.
“Oh, and by the way.” Godson spoke loudly from afar. “I’m officially dating Rainbow Dash!”
“You’re what?!” Luna’s pupils shrunk, leaving Celestia to break into a fit of laughter once more.
But then, she immediately realized what he said.
“YOU’RE WHAT!?”

//-------------------------------------------------------//
           Chapter 1-9: A Ceremony of Stupidity            
//-------------------------------------------------------//
Chapter 1-9: A Ceremony of Stupidity
“Screw you, Twilight. I didn’t want to get dragged back to Canterlot after just leaving it like… yesterday.” Godson groaned.
“Yeah, well. You were the one who decided to be a ninja during your nearly five months in Equestria.” Twilight groaned back.
“What’s that gotta do with anything?” Godson crossed his arms.
“Celestia wants to hold some sort of announcement or something declaring you’re not some sort of monster wanting to destroy all of Equestria, or something…”
“Well…”
“Godson…”
“Fine…”
“Look.” Twilight sighed. “All we gotta do is go in, Celestia does her big announcement, and then we leave. Does that sound so hard?”
“Yes.” Godson nodded. “Very much so.”
Twilight deadpanned at the human, unamused with his response. “Too bad. You’re going anyway.”
“But I don’t wannaaaaaaa!”
Twilight rolled her eyes, her horn aglow as she immediately covered him in her magic aura.
“Too bad!”
In an instant, Twilight casted a spell onto the human, completely rendering him unconscious.
“...Was that necessary?” Dash raised an eyebrow.
“He was being annoying… What do you expect me to do, deal with it?” Twilight raised an eyebrow as well.
“I’ve gotten used to it.”
“So… what is it?”
“This… is the human I pulled from his home…”
“Wait, why did you do that?”
“It’s a long story, Cadance…” Twilight shrugged. “At this point it’s not even worth explaining…”
“Could you shorten it for me?” Cadance asked curiously. “I just wanna have an idea of what happened…”
“Well. Basically, he’s capable of doing stupid things.”
“On a scale of one to ten, how stupid are these stupid things?”
“Uh… They range from 7 to 12.”
“I see…”
Godson groaned softly, raising his head as he scratched the top of it. His vision, while blurred, revealed two blobs staring at him, a purple one, and a pink one.
“Annnnd there he is.” Twilight chuckled softly. “I thought he would of woke up sooner... I didn’t even hit him with the spell that hard.”
Godson raised an eyebrow, looking around his surroundings as his vision began to clear up. Eventually, he began to realize how uncomfortable he was. He looked down to see what excuse of a bed they dumped him in, only to find out it wasn’t even a bed.
He was laying on a wheelbarrow of bananas.
“Can someone explain why I was unconscious on a wheelbarrow of bananas?’ He asked as he raised an eyebrow.
“Oh.” Twilight blinked. “That was Celestia’s idea.”
“Of course it was.” Godson narrowed his eyes in disappointment. “I’m not even gonna bother arguing about it…”
“So you’re the infamous ‘beast’ I’ve been told about this past week.” Cadance thought aloud.
“This ‘beast’ has a friggin’ name.” Godson rolled his eyes, moving around in an attempt to get out of the wheelbarrow.
“Yeah. Twilight told me already.” Cadance nodded, watching as the human eventually fell off the wheelbarrow, tipping it over onto him, piling him in bananas and the wheelbarrow itself. “Uh… Nice to meet you?”
Godson simply waited for Twilight to levitate the heavy wheelbarrow off of him, and stood up once she finally took the hint and did so. “So, judging from your pink… everything… I assume you must be Princess Cadance?”
“Gee, what gave you that idea?” Twilight rolled her eyes.
“You act as if I know everything.” Godson immediately huffed, but then quickly thought about his sentence, which contradicted all of his previous arguments with Twilight. “...Right.”
Cadance eyed the two, trying to understand what they were talking about. “Do I even want to know…?”
Both of them eyed the tall alicorn. “No, you don’t.” They both said in unison.
Cadance blinked, quickly shaking her head as she tried to think of a subject to talk about with the human. “So… Godson…”
“‘Sup?”
“Are you planning on dating anypony anytime soon?”
“Uh.” Godson scratched the back of his neck. “I… I’m already dating somepony.”
“Oh?” Cadance raised an eyebrow. “Nopony told me this during my week here in Canterlot…”
Godson shrugged. “I guess it’s hard for everyone to accept right now?” He shook his head. “I don’t really know.”
“Well, who’s that...uh...lucky somepony then?” Asked a curious Cadance. “Now you have me curious…”
“You’re also very nosey.” Godson huffed. “Already asking about my personal relationships 30 seconds after you met me.”
“Well, she is the Princess of Love.” Twilight rolled her eyes. “Of course she’d ask about these kinds of things.”
“Yeah. Well. I have these things called personal boundaries.” Godson crossed his arms. “And Princess or not, there’s only one mare who’s allowed to ignore those boundaries.”
“And I assume that one mare is your—”
“Yes that one mare is my marefriend.” Godson grumbled. “Geez…”
“Do I know who she is?” Cadance continued her curious pursuit. “See, now I have to know!”
“I… think you’ve met her before...” Godson scratched the back of his head. “I’m not entirely sure…”
“Does she happen to be one of Twilight’s friends?” Cadance asked, wondering if she was getting any closer.
“Y’know, as much as I’d love to continue playing ‘20 Questions’ with you…” Godson cut off Cadance’s pursuit. “I feel like I have better things I could be doing.”
Cadance raised an eyebrow as she watched the human began walking away. “Well. Can I at least ask one more thing?”
Godson stopped in place, and turned his head back. “Shoot.”
“Am I prettier than her?”
Godson narrowed his eyes as the question. “Hm. Let me think about it…” He paused for a moment, building up suspense for Cadance’s question. “No.”
Cadance’s eyes widened as the human left the room. She looked over to Twilight, who simply gawked in shock.
“Do you know who it is?” She asked.
“Yeah.” Twilight nodded slowly. “But I think it’d be better if you heard it from him instead of me.”
As the two were talking, they noticed the human walking back into the room, up to the pile of bananas on the floor, and then proceeded to grab several bananas from the pile, and even go as far as stuff a few into his pocket.
The two alicorns blinked, and the human eventually looked up at the two.
“What?” He spoke. “I may need these later…”
The two alicorns simply remained speechless as he proceeded to stuff a few more into his pocket, and then leave the room.
“...What just happened?” Cadance asked.
“I have a feeling we’re about to witness one of Godson’s dumb moments…”
“Fillies and Gentlecolts!” Celestia spoke loudly. “I am proud to announce that we have a new citizen with us here in Equestria!”
The ponies in the audience several feet below her instantly began their murmuring and their talk, filling the whole area with the constant sound of voices.
“Few of you may have already seen him, and others may have not even heard of his presence in Equestria.” Celestia added. “However, I would like everypony to know, that this new creature means no harm to any of us.”
The audience’s chatter slowly began dying down as Celestia continued her speech.
“This creature has no access to any kind of magic whatsoever. He cannot fly, he cannot cast spells, and while he could have skills that earth ponies have, it would require him thrice as much work to successfully do so.” Celestia explained. “So I would like you all to keep that in mind in case of any event that happens involving him.”
Half of the audience began whispering conversations to each other, while the other half slowly began raising their eyebrows.
“So, without further ado…” Celestia began. “I now present to you… Our first Human in Equestria… Godson!”
The curtains below her open, revealing the aforementioned human casually standing in the center of the stage, his arms crossed as he waited for the curtains to open in the first place.
“Oh.” The human blinked, quickly putting his arms down. “I guess that’s my cue…”
The ponies simply stayed silent, waiting for the human to do something to introduce himself.
Godson paused for a moment, thinking of all the right words to say. Eventually, the best idea came into his mind. “Today! On The Price is Rice!” He began his speech, his voice trying to sound as close to one of those game show hosts. “I’m your host… Godson!”
Everyone immediately raised eyebrows, watching as the human continued his act.
“And today, many of you lucky ponies will get a chance to win…” Godson dug into his pockets, and pulled out multiple bananas. “BANANAS!”
The entirely audience was immediately filled with questioning and concerned voices as the human continued to casually hold the bananas in his hands.
Meanwhile, up above on Celestia’s balcony, Twilight’s hoof met her face as she watched the human continue his stupid act.
“Twilight?” Cadance nudged the unamused alicorn. “Remind me again… He said he was currently dating somepony?”
“Yeah.”
“Is he usually this stupid?”
“Yeah.”
“...Who would find any love towards him?” Cadance gawked in shock.
“You wouldn’t believe me if I told you…” Twilight sighed, looking over to Celestia and Luna.
Luna simply shook her head in disappointment, having been reminded of his prank with Celestia merely a week ago.
Celestia, on the other hand, simply covered her face in her wing, hiding her immense laughter.
It wasn’t until one of the ponies actually spoke up to the human in which all of the princesses reactions meant nothing until this point.
“Excuse me.” A stallion spoke. “How does one win one of those bananas?” Others in the audience glared at the stallion, but he payed no mind to them. “I haven’t had lunch yet, so I’m actually quite hungry…”
“I’m glad you asked!” Godson smiled. “Because you, my good sir, have just won one of these majestic bananas!”
“Really!?” The stallion beamed.
“Yes!” Godson shouted, reaching his arm back with the set of bananas, and throwing one at the stallion.
Unfortunately for the both of them, the banana landed right in the stallion’s face.
The stallion looked down at the banana as it fell to the floor, he simply shrugged, grabbed it, and began peeling it.
The three alicorns jumped as Celestia’s quiet laughter exploded into a fit of pure laughter, even as far as falling onto the floor due to how weak she became from all the laughter.
Meanwhile, Godson continued his act, and began a new plan.
“In fact! Whoever catches any of these bananas gets to keep ‘em!” Godson smiled. “Even if it just touches you, it’s yours!”
Twilight simply just kept a blank face, not even bothering to say anything on the matter. Not one chuckle, not one word, not even a sigh of unamusement.
Cadance, however, was surprisingly holding back a few giggles as she continued to watch.
Luna wasn’t even there anymore, and Celestia was still on the floor, laughing.
“You get a banana!” Godson threw a banana from his pocket onto someone’s face. “And you get a banana!” Eventually, he grabs all the bananas from his pockets, and proceeds to throw the entire set of bananas up into the sky, letting them all fall in random directions. “Everyone gets a banana!”
Eventually, Cadance’s giggles slowly turned into full-on laughter. While not as strong as Celestia’s fit of laughter, it was evident that Cadance was enjoying this just as much as the alicorn on the floor was.
“Well. I can see why whoever that lucky mare is has such feelings for him!” She said through her laughter. “This is hilarious!”
And soon enough, after watching her two fellow princesses laugh, Twilight slowly found herself laughing along with them.
As the princesses continued their laughter, Godson reached for his pockets once more, only to find nothing inside it’s storage.
“Welp.” Godson shrugged, his voice returning back to its natural pitch. “I’m all outta bananas.” He immediately began walking back into the castle. “That’s all, folks!”
In an instant, he closed the doors behind him, leaving the entire audience completely and utterly confused.
“I am back.” Luna said, walking back into the balcony. “What did I mi—”
Before she could process anything else, she simply watched as the other three princess laughed.
“...What happened while I was gone…?”
“I can’t believe you did that, Godson!” Twilight shouted. “What were you thinking, throwing bananas at everypony?”
Godson shrugged. “One of them said he was hungry. What do you expect me to do? Not give him a banana? It’d be unfair if I gave one of them a banana, and not give all of them bananas!”
Twilight facehoofed. “You’re ridiculous. Godson.”
“I’m ridiculous!?” Godson jerked his head back. “I was just keeping the ponies entertained! What did you want me to do, just walk up there, say ‘hi’, and then leave?”
“Yeah. Pretty much.” Twilight nodded.
“That’s boring!” Godson scoffed. “What I did earlier was much more entertaining! Go on, tell me you weren’t laughing.”
“I wasn—”
“And don’t lie to me, Sparkle!”
Twilight narrowed her eyes. “Fine. I may have laughed a little bit.”
“Well. You had me and Celestia laughing our heads off.” Cadance spoke up as she walked into the room. “Now, will you tell me who your special somepony is?”
“Why do you gotta be so nosey?” Godson crossed his arms. “Geez. You’re like that one nosey step-sister that everyone wants nothing to do with.”
“Fine!” Cadance huffed. “Don’t tell me! It’s not like I wanted to help with your relationship or something…”
“How exactly did you plan on helping, anyway?” Godson raised an eyebrow. “Were you gonna grab cupid’s magic bow and shoot our butts with it?”
“If you’re into that sort of thing, sure…” Cadance raised her own eyebrow. “I was planning on giving you a gift for you and your marefriend… Maybe even help intensify your feelings for each other. Because, y’know, I can do that…”
Twilight simply stayed silent, and looked up to the human.
“...What kind of gift we talkin’ about here?”
“Well, maybe if you’d stop being so rude and tell me who she is, I’d tell you.” Cadance grumbled.
“Fineee…” Godson sighed in defeat. “I’m dating Rainbow Dash.”
Cadance laughed at the human’s response. “Okay, seriously. Who is it?”
Godson narrowed his eyes as he crossed his arms, simply staring at the Princess of Love as she awaited the correct answer, despite having already received it.
“...Wait.” Cadance blinked. “You’re serious!?”
Twilight scratched the back of her neck. “Heh… Told you you wouldn’t believe me.”
“YOU’RE SERIOUS?!”
“What’s so difficult to believe about that!?” Godson huffed. “At this point, I’m shocked that you believe I’m dating at all!”
“You’re…” Cadance attempted to process the rest of her sentence. “You’re serious… Wow…”
“Yes.” Godson nodded sarcastically. “I’m as serious as Twilight is about writing to Celestia all the friggin’ time.”
“Hey!”
Cadance finally snapped out of her shock. “Right. Sorry.” She shook her head. “Um… Are you two… by any chance… official?”
“Now that.” Godson rolled his eyes. “Is personal information. You’re basically going a step beyond my boundaries and asking about my sex life.”
“...So is that a yes?”
“Yes.”
“Geez, Godson.” Cadance widened her eyes. “That’s actually really surprising to hear.”
“Why’s that?” Godson cocked his head to the side.
“Well. I assumed that Rainbow… uh… swung the other way.”
“Holy shit, Cadance…” Godson huffed. “Why would you immediately assume that Dash is a lesbian?”
“Uh… Two things.” Cadance spoke softly. “One, the word ‘Rainbow’ in her name. And the fact both her mane and tail are rainbows.”
Godson instantly made a blank expression, then quickly shook his head as he returned to reality. “I happen to enjoy that rainbow mane of hers!” He retorted. ”...And her tail, too…”
“Well. I guess she happens to enjoy you, too.” Cadance smiled. “Glad she was able to find someone to love.”
“I’m… not sure if I should be offended by that or not…” Godson thought aloud.
“Relax.” Cadance patted his back with her hoof. “If you still want that gift for the two of you to use, just let me know.”
“Why can’t I ask for it now?”
“Trust me. You don’t need it right now.” Cadance shook her head.
“Uh... Alright…” Godson nodded slowly. “Welp. Speaking of gifts, I should probably find some sort of souvenir or something for her…”
Godson was sneaking around the castle, looking for a souvenir to give his marefriend, when he noticed out of the corner of his eye, something that seemed to be like fiery feathers inside the room to his right, whose door was slightly open.
“Huh?” He paused in his tracks. “What’s that…?” He peaked through the crack, only to find a familiar phoenix in the room. Having enough experience with wings, he figured he could help remove a few feathers without injuring the bird, or even hurting its ability to fly.
“Welp. Maybe I could use these feathers for something…” Godson thought aloud. “Maybe combine them with something and use it as a gift?”
Shrugging, the human slowly made his way into the room, sneaking up to the magical bird. Once he was close enough, he timidly began caressing its back, giving it the awareness of his presence, but knowing he wasn’t there to hurt it.
Soon enough, he began working his magic, preening the bird’s wings using his hands, similar to how he did so to his marefriend. Little by little, he was able to get several feathers, and even move some back into place, creating a win-win situation for both him and the bird.
Once he had enough feathers, he turned back to the door.
...And unfortunately, there was someone already standing, waiting for him to be noticed.
“So.” Shining Armor spoke. “Sneaking around the castle, and messing with Philomena, huh?”
“You make it sound so sexual.” Godson scoffed. “Don’t you have a wife for that kind of stuff?”
“How was I supposed to know that preening Philomena was enough of a reason for Shining to throw me into jail!?”
“Are you kidding me, Godson!?” Twilight shouted. “What purpose did you possibly have for doing such a thing, anyway!?”
“...I wanted it’s feathers.”
Twilight gave the human a serious look. “...Why?”
“I was gonna use them for a gift for Dash…”
“Couldn’t you have used something else…?”
“I could’ve… But phoenix feathers look so cooooool!” Godson whined. “But, man. Your brother’s strict as hell…”
“He’s both the captain of the Royal Guard and a prince!”
“Wait, marrying Cadance made him a prince?” Godson raised an eyebrow.
“Yes…”
“So that means whoever marries you will also wind up a prince?”
“Yes…?”
“Well, shit.” Godson blinked. “I guess that’s never gonna happen, is it?”
“Godson!”
“What? Your love life is pretty much non-existent!”
“Godson…!” Twilight groaned. “You’re not making this situation any better for yourself…”
“But I’m not wrong… am I?”
“Explain to me how you’re friends with this thing, again?” Shining Armor walked into the room.
“Heeeeeey! It’s shield butt!” Godson cheered. “How ya doin’, pal? I mean, you’ve only been gone five minutes and all… But still!”
“Can I cast a silence spell on him?” Shining asked to his younger sister. “He’s your friend, after all.”
“Eh.” Twilight shrugged. “Nah. Just leave him in there for a few days. He’ll learn his lesson.”
“Twilightwhatareyoudoing?” Godson spoke stupidly quick. “TWILIGHTNODON’TLEAVEME!”
Twilight rolled her eyes, and simply made her way out of the room.
“SHOULD I SLOW DOWN A BIT?” Godson shouted. “TWILIGHT PLEASE DON’T LEAVE ME IN HERE!”
Twilight simply kept walking, as well as her brother following suit.
“I HAVE A WIFE AND THREE KIDS!” He continued to shout like an idiot. “Wait. No I don’t…”
Eventually, the two had left the room entirely, and the door had closed behind them.
“Holy shit…” Godson cursed under his breath. “They actually left me in here…”
He looked around, finding something to occupy himself with, but found nothing.
“Welp. I’m bored.” He deadpanned. “Where’s Dashie when ya need her?”
He looked behind him, finding a hard bed hanging from the wall, he looked around some more, and found what he thinks could be a toilet, but decided against thinking so. He looked back at the door in which Twilight and Shining had used to leave.
“Twiliiiiiiiight!” He called out. “I’m booooooooored!”
No response.
“Twiliiiiiiight!” He called out once more. “I know you’re there! I’m boooored!”
Again, no response.
“Just give me something to entertain myself with! Hell, at least let me see my marefriend for an hour or two!” He called out again, completely careless about whether he was bothering Twilight or not. “Do you know how boring it is in here!?”
In an instant, the door was thrown open. “FINE!” Twilight shouted. “I was only gonna leave you in here for like an hour, but sweet Celestia, it’s not worth it!”
“Why do you gotta be so rude, Twilight?” Godson crossed his arms. “You know I can’t be in some empty place unless I have either something to entertain myself with, or my marefriend.”
“What’s Rainbow have to do with...Y’know what, I don’t wanna know.” Twilight shook her head, opening the cell. “There.” She groaned. “Just stop doing stupid things, alright?”
“Fine.” Godson huffed. “But I want those feathers back.”
“Well you’re not getting them.” Twilight deadpanned.
“Why not?” Celestia poked her head through the door. “If he really needed some feathers, he could’ve just asked…”
Twilight turned her head around. “...Seriously?”
“Well. It’s the least I could do for him helping me out with some stuff around the castle last week, and making me laugh so much earlier today…”
Twilight looked back at the human with narrowed eyes, and sighed.
“You got lucky. This time.”

//-------------------------------------------------------//
            Chapter 1-10: A "Perfect" Birthday             
//-------------------------------------------------------//
Chapter 1-10: A "Perfect" Birthday
“So, for Dashie’s birthday, we need to make it bigger and better than it was last year!”
“Why?”
“Why not?” Pinkie tilted her head askew. “Last year’s party was already amazing! Why not make it ten times more amazing!?”
“How does one even do such a thing…?” Godson raised an eyebrow.
“I have my ways, Goddy. I have my ways…”
Godson narrowed his eyes. “Didn’t I tell you not to call me that?”
“There’s no time for that, Goddy!” Pinkie ignored his statement. “We got work to do!”
“Actually, Pinkie…”
“We’re gonna need streamers, balloons, ice sculptures, statues!” Pinkie began listing objects.
“Pinkie…”
“Rainbow-based decorations, rainbow invitations!”
“Pinkie.”
“Party cannons, Rainbow cakes, maybe we can even get Cheese Sandwich to help again!”
“PINKIE!”
“Huh?” Pinkie turned her head back, now having finally noticed the human’s cries for attention.
“I was thinking that… maybe we could do something… different… this time?”
“Like what?” Pinkie raised an eyebrow.
“Well… Like… letting me plan Dashie’s birthday party this year…?” Godson shrugged. “I mean… Dash and I just had a week vacation to ourselves… like… a month and a half ago, I think.”
“B-but…” Pinkie’s ears flopped back. “I’m the expert party planner…”
“I… never said you weren’t…” Godson sighed. “I just want to be the one to be in charge for this year’s party. That way I can make it… I don’t know… special for her, or something…”
“It’s already gonna be super duper special if I’m the one in charge!”
“No, Pink—” Godson cut himself off with a sigh, knowing he would never be able to win this battle. “Y’know what… Nevermind. Forget I said anything...”
“Goddy… I don’t see how you could make Dashie’s party any more special than I could!”
“Because it would have came from me, Pinkie!” Godson half-heartedly barked at the cheerful mare. “I’ve barely done much to show Dash just how much I love her. All I’ve done so far is help take care of her whenever she’d needed me, a few extra dates here and there, and some other stuff that I’d rather not talk about out loud.”
“What about your vacation?” Pinkie cocked her head to the side.
“Yeah. That’s probably the only extra thing I’ve done recently.” Godson replied. “Just let me have this one, Pinkie. You can have the next one, and the ones after that, I don’t care.”
“Well…” Pinkie placed a thinking hoof on her chin.
“Pinkie, please.” Godson practically begged at this point. “All I’m asking is this one time to show her how much I appreciate her.”
Reluctantly, Pinkie sighed in defeat. “Alright…” She spoke softly. “You can have this one, Goddy.”
“Thanks, Pinkie. You won’t regret this!”
Godson simply watched as Twilight placed a rainbow colored blanket on a simple, wooden picnic table, which sat under the shade of a large tree near the river bank. Streamers were thrown on the tree branches, connecting them all to create a more natural vibe. Balloons were tied up on the four edges of the table, as well as on a few wooden posts nearby.
“Goddy?”
“Yes?”
“Is it just me, or does this party look a little bit… basic?”
Godson shrugged. “I’m not that great at planning parties, what do you expect me to do?”
“You could have me—”
“No.” Godson interrupted. “I said I was gonna be the one planning this party. So I’m gonna be the one planning this party.”
“Fine…” Pinkie rolled her eyes. “It’s just this whole… ‘party’ of yours doesn’t seem like it’s good enough.”
“Oh?” Godson raised an eyebrow. “And what do you suggest?”
“More streamers?” Pinkie tilted her head to the side.
“More streamers?” Godson repeated.
Pinkie shrugged. “We could probably use a few sta—”
“No.”
“But…!”
“Pinkie!” Godson interrupted once more. “I don’t want to make this party overly dramatic. We don’t need any over-the-top things. No statues, no party cannons, we don’t need this party to be that huge.”
“No party cannons?!” gasped Pinkie, “What kind of party would this be without party cannons?”
“...You’re right.” Godson blinked. “Just one.”
“Yay!”
Godson looked up, noticing a lack of something important.
“...Y’know, we could probably use a banner or something, huh?”
“I dunno.” Pinkie shrugged. “You’re the one planning this party…”
“Oh, so when I ask for your opinion. You don’t help?” Godson crossed his arms. “I see how it is.”
“Well. If you really wanted my opinion, you’d let me throw in some—”
“Alright, alright. I get your point.” Godson grumbled. “Could you at least help make the
banner for the party?”
“Hm…” Pinkie placed a thinking hoof on her chin, “Only if I get to have two party cannons.”
“How about we don’t have party cannons?”
“Y’know what?” Pinkie quickly said. “One party cannon’s good…”
“That’s what I thought.”
“Easy, easy…” Dash muttered, her eyes blindfolded as her human slowly guided her to where she needed to be. “I thought you didn’t like parties…”
“Yeah, well. I don’t mind a few parties once in awhile…” Godson reassured the mare. “Geez. I try to avoid a few parties, and I get labeled for life...”
“That’s your own fault.” Dash snorted. “Pinkie’s held like a good twenty parties while you’ve been here in Equestria.” She pointed out. “...And you’ve only appeared for… three of them.”
“Yeah well. This one’s different.”
“How so?”
“You’ll see.” Godson ended their talk with a smirk, continuing to guide the mare to the party.
Once they arrived to their destination,as Godson slowly untied the blindfold, Dash glanced around. At first, she had expected something up to Pinkie’s usual standards, but instead found a simplistic banner held up by two branches of two different trees. While the style of the banner was something Pinkie Pie would normally make, the rest of the party didn’t seem to match up. There was a small picnic table at the center of the area, covered by a red and white checkerboard blanket. The table was filled with an assortment of foods, the most noticeable, however, was a four layered vanilla cake, covered in rainbow icing and several candles spread around certain parts of the cake, as well as a mini figure of herself at the very top. There were also chairs laid out around the table, where all of her friends had sat, smiling at her.
The mare immediately raised an eyebrow, confused over the party she had been brought to.
“Surprise!” Godson cheered. “It’s… uh… a picnic party…!”
“Huh…?” Dash uttered. “...Uh.” She quickly shook her head. Not wanting to make anyone feel bad, she quickly forced a fake smile. “W-Wow, guys! I...really wasn’t expecting this!”
As Dash slowly walked closer to the center of the party, she slowly looked around, unamused by the placement of the decorations, and the little amount there were.
“Heh… Pinkie…” Dash sheepishly chuckled. “You went all out… didn’t you?”
“You… don’t like it… do you?” Godson’s smile morphed into a mix of sadness and seriousness.
“I mean… it’s oka—” Dash cut herself off, slowly turning her head back to the human.
He sheepishly chuckled, looking around at the mess he created.
“Y-You…” Dash spoke softly. “You planned all of this…?”
Godson shrugged, ignoring the frowns slowly appearing on everyone else’s faces. “I guess it was a little crap.” He crossed his arms, forcing a chuckle. “I suppose that’s what I get for actually putting effort into something, huh?”
Dash widened her eyes upon her new realization. “N-No…! That’s not what I mean—”
“It’s…fine.” Godson smiled softly. “I probably should’ve just left it to the expert…”
“Yeah you should’ve!” Pinkie cut in, spooking the pegasus, who had now shifted her view to her.
Godson nodded, placing his hands in his pockets. “Yeah, well… I tried.” He turned around. “It’s not my fault that I’m bad at planning parties.” He huffed.
Dash immediately turned her attention back to her human, who was now walking away from the scene.
“Godson! Wait…!” Dash shouted in an attempt to get his attention.
Unfortunately for her, her attempts were futile, as the human seemed to have ignored her.
Pinkie immediately got in her face, blocking her view. “Now that that’s out of the way.”
“Pinkie!” Everyone else, minus Dash, had all shouted at once.
“...What?” Pinkie raised an eyebrow. “I warned him! What do you all expect from me?”
Shortly afterwards, a party cannon, not too far from the party itself, launched an explosion of confetti, however, it didn’t reach very far, and in fact, landed near where Pinkie stood.
“...Welp.” She shrugged.
Dash simply eyed the mare in front of her, then looked back at the massive cake behind her. She slowly walked up to it, examining it closely. Upon closer look, she noticed a few things. For one, the miniature figure of herself was standing on her two rear legs, rather than standing on all fours, as well as her front hooves shaped in a way as if she were hugging something. And while it was hard to notice, but upon even further inspection, the figure’s face seemed to have a lot of time and effort put into it, as it seemed to have a fully detailed face, which was looking up to something, and carried a smile of its own. She raised an eyebrow at the odd detail, curious over the odd decision to do so.
Applejack, sitting on a chair not to far from the pegasus mare, noticed her reaction, and looked up to the figuring. She, too, raised an eyebrow, but not for the same reason that Dash did, for she knew what was missing. She looked back onto the table, finding an important piece to the decoration.
She picked it up with a hoof, and brought it up high enough to grab Dash’s attention. “Is this what you were lookin’ for, sugarcube?”
Dash looked at what Applejack had held in her hoof, and, upon realization, her eyes soon widened as she slowly began to pick it up for herself.
The object she held in her hooves, was another figurine…
...of Godson.
The figurine wasn’t as detailed as Dash’s, the clothes were simplistic, being generic, dark red clothes, but the arms, however, seemed to also appear as if it was hugging something, its face, looked down, carrying a similar smile to the other figuring.
Dash looked back to her figure, then back to the one in her grasp. In an instant, a lightbulb lit up in her head, and she had slowly placed the mini-Godson in front of her miniature self, completing its true form.
She stepped back slowly, now looking at the complete cake in all of its glory, however, she paid no mind to the details on the cake, but rather, the two figurines.
The figurines held each other in a warm, loving embrace, both of them staring at each other's eyes as they smiled, almost seeming not to care about anything in the world, but the two of them.
“Did…” Dash finally spoke. “...Did Godson make this?”
Pinkie looked at the figurines at the top, then back at Dash. “The figurines, or the cake?”
“The fig—”
“Cause he made them both.”
Dash paused, then blinked as she turned her head to the cheerful mare next to her. “...What?”
Pinkie nodded. “I insisted on planning the party, but Goddy refused to let me make the cake, whether I was the one planning the party, or not.” She giggled softly. “I guess all that time he spent working at the bakery with me paid off, huh? He’s still bad at planning parties, though...”
The sight of all the work that she now knew Godson threw effort into, slowly brought tears to her eyes. She couldn’t help but smile like an idiot at the party around her. While the party decorations itself lacked, it was never about them, the reason why Godson specifically arranged the party this way, inviting only her friends, with very minimal things drawing attention away from the party.
It was not only to keep the attention around her.
But to keep her attention around everyone who cared about her.
It was at that moment, Rainbow Dash knew what she had to do.
“I gotta go after him.”
She flew up to the door, immediately stopping once she was close enough, and landed back onto the ground. She twisted the knob gently, making sure it wasn’t locked, surely enough, she was able to twist the knob all the way. She pushed the door open, and slowly entered the house, then closed the door behind her.
Before she could even go and look around for the human, she had already noticed a speeding Linda making her way over to the mare, practically begging for attention.
“Heya, Linda…” She softly spoke, patting the dog’s head with her wing. “Godson didn’t let you in the room with him, huh?”
Linda seemed to understand what Dash had said, and immediately ran off to the door to the bedroom, signalling her to follow. Once Dash had gotten close enough, Linda had immediately gotten on two her two rear paws, and began scratching onto the door with her front paws.
Dash gently shushed the dog, and pointed back to the living room, where Tank also simply sat in his own little corner, minding his own business. Eventually, Linda took the hint, and ran back in that direction.
Once the dog was minding her own business once again, Dash had slowly turned her head back to the door in front of her. With a soft sigh, she grabbed the doorknob, and gave it a twist. She pushed the door open, and made her way through, wanting to see what awaited her on the other end.
Godson merely lifted his head up from the bed, looking at what entered the room, then instantly plopped his head back onto the pillow once he saw who it was.
“Hm. So, party’s over that quick?” He grumbled. “I’m surprised Pinkie didn’t have some sort of ‘backup’ plan.”
“I told them to wait a little while.” Dash replied. “...I wanted to come see you, first…”
Godson slowly sat up, the blankets falling from him to cover his legs, instead. “It’s your day, Dash. You might as well go enjoy it, at least.”
“I can’t enjoy it unless you’re there with me.” Dash slowly walked up to the bed.
“Eh.” Godson shook his head. “I’d… rather not be reminded of the excuse of a party I made. If I see it again, I’m just gonna get more aggravated that it didn’t live up to your expecta—”
“I thought it was perfect.”
“Huh?” Godson raised an eyebrow. “But I thought…”
“I’ll admit, at first, I was expecting something huge from Pinkie...” Dash nodded, climbing up to the bed, and sitting in front of the now confused human. “...But then I saw the cake you made…”
Godson blinked. “You did, huh…?”
“Mhm.” Dash nodded slowly. “And do you know what I have to say about it?”
Before the human could ask, Dash lunged herself forward, tackling the human down back down onto the bed as she wrapped her hooves around the human, pressing her lips against his as she held him down. Shortly afterwards, she pulled back, leaving the human both dazed and confused.
“I loved it.” She smiled. “Everything you did. All the work you put into it all… I loved it.”
Godson slowly wrapped his arms around the mare, and smiled back.
“Well, I mean. I’m no Pinkie… but I didn’t think it was that go—”
“It was perfect.” Dash interrupted. “You planned everything in such a way to make it so nopony would be drawn to the party decorations. Because the real party was all of us, together, celebrating my birthday.”
Godson chuckled. “I didn’t think I had it in me to make such an awesome party…”
“Mhm.” Dash nodded, ignoring his selfish comment this one time. “But it wouldn’t be as perfect as it should be if you weren’t there to celebrate it with us.”
Godson slowly rolled over, making the both of them lay on their side. “Just give me a few minutes… I’m a bit sleepy, I really wasn’t expecting to have to do anything else today…”
“Alright…” Dash snickered at the human’s retort, letting him have his moment. Soon, she came up with an amazing idea. She looked at the human, and quickly pecked him on the lips.
“Hey, Godson…?” She spoke timidly.
The human raised an eyebrow. “Hm?” He hummed.
“Could you… plan next year’s party?” Dash asked. “...Exactly the same way you did with this one?”
Godson’s eyes widened. “Are you sure?”
“I’m 120% positive.” Dash nodded.
Godson chortled at the mare’s remark. “If Pinkie’s fine with letting me do it, then… Yeah.”
Dash hummed happily, and quickly reached for another quick kiss.
“And the year after that?”
“Sure.”
“And the year after that one?”
“...Are you trying to ask me to keep planning your birthday party the same way every year?” Godson raised an eyebrow.
“...Only if you want to…”
Godson paused for a moment, thinking about the mare’s offer. Wondering why he shouldn’t, he sealed the offer with his own kiss to his marefriend.
“It’s a deal...”

//-------------------------------------------------------//
           Chapter 1-11: (Not So) Secret Santa!            
//-------------------------------------------------------//
Chapter 1-11: (Not So) Secret Santa!
“Alright everypony, it’s that time of the year again.”
Godson nudged his marefriend next to him. “I’m calling it now, it’s gonna be a secret san—”
“It’s time for… a SECRET SANTA PARTY!”
“CALLED IT!” Godson shouted off the top of his lungs, practically scaring everypony around him, even the rainbow-maned mare sitting next to him. After quickly realizing his dumb mistake, he smiled sheepishly, returning his attention to his mare.
Surprisingly, though, Pinkie didn’t even seem to be fazed one bit. “See? Goddy’s excited for it!”
I’m not reall—
“So!” Pinkie continued with her plans. “I have stuffed everyone’s names into this top hat that Goddy gave me a few months back!” She quickly pulled a top hat from behind her, shaking it around in an attempt to shuffle the names.
“Each one of you will grab one name from the list, and you will be in charge of getting them a gift.” Pinkie explained. “And you can never tell the pony you’re buying a gift for that you’re their secret santa until the party’s over.”
“Pinkie.” Godson rolled his eyes. “I’m pretty sure we all know how this works.”
“Oh yeah?” Pinkie raised an eyebrow. “Just for that, you’re going first!”
Godson shrugged, not seeming to care in the slightest about Pinkie’s new decision. He got up, and walked over to the top hat in Pinkie’s hoof, and grabbed a small piece of paper from it. He looked at the name listed on the paper, and chuckled…
...For the paper had Twilight’s name.
“Welp. I think this might be a little bit easy for me…” He thought aloud.
“Dashie, you’re next!”
Dash immediately stood up upon hearing her name, walked up to the pink mare, and grabbed a name from the hat.
“Hm. Interesting.” Dash slowly nodded.
“Next!”
“Nope… Nope...” Godson muttered, looking through a shelf of books he found in a store. “C’mon… It can’t be that hard to find a book Twilight doesn’t have…”
Ironically, as if the world was trying to get him to stop complaining, he found the perfect book.
“Aha!”
But, to his surprise, he was caught off guard by a familiar laugh. He turned around sharply, moving the book around so it was behind him, only to find an equally familiar mare now in his field of view.
“Finally found something?” Dash gave a knowing smile as she raised an eyebrow.
“Maybe.” Godson retorted. “It’s probably something for you, and you’re spoiling the surprise just being here…”
“Please.” Dash scoffed. “One, I can tell that’s a book you’re holding behind your back. And two. I don’t read books unless it’s Daring Do, which it isn’t.”
“So? It’s probably a book that I thought you’d take an interest in!”
“You’re Twilight’s secret san—”
“Yeah pretty much.”
“Heh. You got the easy one.” Dash chuckled. “I feel bad for the poor sap who’s stuck with the hardest one.”
Godson raised an eyebrow. “And that is?”
“Uh. Well, depending on who is their secret santa… You, or Pinkie.” Dash bluntly stated.
“But, Pinkie may be the easiest one out of all of us.” Godson cocked his head to the side. “Just buy a cake, or something.”
“...Eh, true.” Dash shrugged. “I have a decently challenging one, though.”
“How so?”
“I’m not telling you!” Dash snapped at the human. “For all you know, it very well could be you!”
“Dash, we’ve known each other for about a year now.” Godson deadpanned. “I’m pretty sure you’d know exactly what to get me.”
“Crap.” Dash muttered. “You’re right.”
“So, who is it?”
“I’m still not gonna tell…” Dash grumbled.
“Alright.” Godson shrugged, continuing in his quest to buy Twilight’s gift by walking over to the register.
“Hey, Godson!”
Godson stopped midway in his journey, and turned around. “Hm?”
“Uh. Quick question.”
“Shoot.”
“What do you get for somepony with a crapton of animals?”
Godson simply deadpanned. “Welp. Thanks for giving it away.”
“What!? No I didn—”
“How many ponies do we know with a crapton of animals?” Godson interrupted.
“Uh…” Dash paused for a moment to think, then instantly groaned as soon as she realized her screw up. “Crap.”
“Exactly.” Godson chuckled. “As for what you should get for her… Uh. I dunno, animal feed, or something?”
“That’s a terrible idea.”
“I never said it wasn’t.”
“...Good point.”
As everypony reunited back at the base of the party, they began to leave their gifts on a large table that was at the very center of the room. Once the table was full of their gifts, big and small, they all sat down a good distance away from it, with Pinkie, the host, standing right between them and the table.
“Alright everypony. We’re finally at the end of our secret santa party!” Pinkie cheered. “I hope you all got the best possible gift you can find!”
“Uh, don’t we have to get up and actually grab our pre—”
“Nope!” Pinkie interrupted. “I will be the one to deliver everypony’s gift, one at a time, that way we can watch as they unwrap their gift!”
“That sounds like a terrib—”
“Twilight! You’re up first!” Pinkie shouted, immediately grabbing Twilight’s gift, and practically chucking it at the alicorn.
Luckily, she was able to stop it from making a crash course to her face with her magic. Shortly afterwards, she narrowed her eyes at the bouncing pink mare, and proceeded to read the note hanging from her wrapped present.
In an instant, Godson felt a strange disturbance in the room. He looked to his left, and was welcomed to Twilight’s immediate death stare, now that she knew he was her secret santa. He simply laughed sheepishly, as he then watched the mare unwrap her present.
To both of their surprise, the book that Godson bought for her was actually a book that wasn’t in her collection.
“Huh.” Twilight blinked. “How’d you know I didn’t already have this book?”
“I may be dating someone who’s isn’t much of a book fanatic.” Godson rolled his eyes. “But that doesn’t mean I’m the same way about them. You don’t think I’ve read enough books from your library to know what you do and don’t have?”
“...Fair enough.”
“Dashie, you’re next!” Pinkie shouted, quickly grabbing what appeared to be a large bottle wrapped in wrapping paper, and instead of chucking it, she ran over to the rainbow maned mare, and gave it to her.
“Oh…?” Dash raised an eyebrow. “Am I gonna like where this is going…?”
“You’re not gonna know until you open it, Dash.” Godson nudged her.
“Welp. Here goes nothing.” Dash immediately dug into the paper, practically ripping it to shreds as she desperately tried to find out what it was.
Upon seeing exactly what it was, Godson’s eyes widened. “Is that…”
“Yup!” Applejack smiled. “It’s a whole 2 litre bottle of my famous cider.”
Dash’s eyes widened upon hearing those words, and her mouth quickly began to drool the more she held it in her hooves.
And then, Godson snatched it away from her grasp.
“Hey!” Dash immediately began reaching for it, only to be blocked by the human’s hand. “Give that back!”
“I’d love to, Dashie. Seriously, I would.” Godson shook his head. “But considering the last time you had your hooves on this much cider… Things didn’t go so well.”
“I can’t say the same, considering how much you enjoyed that night…”
“That was your own fault.” Godson deadpanned. “Do you expect me to turn down an offer for se—”
“Goddy! You’re up!”
Next thing he knew, there was a box on a one-way trip right to his face. He immediately placed the bottle down onto the floor, and shielded his face with his arms to prevent the box from breaking his only pair of glasses. Luckily, it had succeeded, as the box hit his arms, and landed in front of him, instead.
Sighing, he then went ahead and grabbed the box, and slowly unwrapped the top, and opened it.
Before he could even get a look at what it was, Rarity instantly spoke up. “After the whole ‘sharing your jacket with Rainbow Dash’ ordeal, I figured I could do something about that.”
Godson looked into the box, and pulled out another jacket from inside it.
“...So I made a jacket that could actually support the two of you, together.” Rarity finished her sentence with a smile.
Godson looked up to the marshmallow mare, and smiled back. “Wow… Thanks, Rarity! This… this is actually great!”
“Just don’t mess up the other clothes I made for you, and we’ll call it even.”
Soon after, everypony had opened their gifts, and the party was slowly drawing to a close. Pinkie had returned the table to it’s rightful place, and the others were already preparing to leave.
“So…” Dash remarked with a sultry smile. “Let’s say you and I take advantage of AJ’s cider?” She quickly began nuzzling the human, wrapped around in his embrace as they shared his new jacket.
“That sounds very tempting, considering how cold it’s starting to get…” Godson replied with his own smile.
“Well, maybe I could warm you up…” Dash brought her face closer to his, her smile never ceasing as she continued her pursuit.
Eventually, Godson noticed something, he looked up, and raised an eyebrow at the mistletoe that Twilight magically floated above them.
With a chuckle, he looked back at the mare in his embrace. “Would ya look at that, Dash. Mistleto—”
Dash immediately cut his sentence off, pressing her lips against his.
“Heh, I knew that would happen…” Twilight giggled at the two. “I’m glad those two have each other.”
“What about you, Twilight?” Pinkie raised an eyebrow.
“Me?” Twilight raised an eyebrow back. “I don’t see myself as the dating type.”
“Uh-huh. We’ll see about that.”

//-------------------------------------------------------//
               Chapter 1-12: Familiar Faces                
//-------------------------------------------------------//
Chapter 1-12: Familiar Faces
“Pinkie…? What are you doing…?”
“Preparing for a party…?”
“Who’s party?”
“...Yours?”
Godson sighed softly. “I thought we agreed not to have any parties thrown for me anymore..”
“But it’s been a year since you’ve been heeeeere!” Pinkie whined. “How else are we supposed to celebrate that if we can’t throw a party!?”
Godson shrugged. “You could just casually mention it. Y’know, like ‘oh, hey, you’ve been in Equestria for a year now, cool!’ or something…”
“Oh.” Pinkie blinked, her emotion seemingly fading away, but then quickly popping back to normal as she thought of something. “Hey!”
“Hm?” Godson raised an eyebrow.
“You’ve been in Equestria for a year now! Cool!” Pinkie cheered. “I’m still throwing that party, though.” She deadpanned.
“...Of course you are.” Godson rolled his eyes, sighing in defeat. “...Actually, now that I think about it, doesn’t today mark a year and three months?”
“Yeah, but these past three months have been busy for me. So this is the next best thing!”
“Right…”
The entrance to the shop opened behind them. Before the two could look back to see who it was, a voice spoke, and they instantly knew who it was.
“Hey guys, what’s up?” Dash smiled softly, approaching the arguing pair.
Godson’s ear twitched at the voice, turning around to face his marefriend with open arms. “Hey, Dashie!” He grabbed the mare, pulling her into a hug.
Once the two were done with their show of affection, Dash looked around, noticing all the balloons, streamers, and other general party decorations. “Woah, what’s all this for?”
“Pinkie’s throwing a party for it being a year and three months since my arrival in Equestria.”
“Which arrival? The time where you tried to take over Equestria, or…?” Dash tilted her head.
“My latest arrival.” Godson replied.
“Ahh.” Dash nodded softly. “Right, right.”
“And this party’s gonna be super duper big! We’ll invite everypo—”
“No we won’t.” Godson interrupted.
“Yes we will.” Pinkie countered.
“Pinks, you know how I feel about being in a large crowd.” Godson pointed out. “I just… no.”
“Yes.” Pinkie narrowed her eyes. “End. Of. Discussion.”
”Dammit Pinkie...”
“Now.” Pinkie returned to her original statement. “We’ll invite everypony, there’ll be cake, music, it’ll be the best party ever!”
“You say that about every—”
“Just let her, Godson. There’s nothing you can do to stop her…”
“Ooh! That reminds me, I need to start working on that chocolate cake!”
Before anyone could say anything, Pinkie had already bolted straight to the kitchen.
Godson sighed, not bothering to stop Pinkie anymore. He looked back to his marefriend, who was still in his grasp. “So, Dashie… What are you doing out here so early?”
“Oh. They let me out early, seeing how there wasn’t a whole lot to do.” Dash explained, slowly leaning her head forward towards his. “Which means you get to have me all to yourself just as earlier…”
“I can see that...” Godson chuckled as he met her halfway, leaning his closer to hers, pressing his lips against hers.
The mare in his embrace hummed softly as they kissed. As soon as she felt she had enough, she slowly pulled back, leaving her human wanting a little more. He further proved how much she’d left him wanting more when he slowly leaned forward, sensually kissing her neck.
“G-Godson…” She whispered. “We’re in public…”
“Then how about we go someplace that’s not in public…?” Godson whispered back.
Dash giggled quietly. “I can tell you’re in a good mood…”
“Just a bit…” Godson nodded, slowly went up, until he was able to nibble on her ear. “What do you say, Dash…? Let’s make use of the extra time we have…”
“Mmm~… I’d love to…” Dash stifled a moan. “But don’t you still have work to do…?”
“Pinkie’s letting me off today, since she refuses to let me help do anything related to my own party…”
“Oooh…” Dash cooed. “So that means I have you all to myself?”
“I guess so…” Godson smirked.
“...You know what? I think a little privacy might do us some good…”
Twilight rushed up to Godson’s door, coming to bring urgent news. With a loud knock on the door, she shouted out. “Godson! Something big is happening!”
The doorknob shakes just a bit, spooking the alicorn mare. It twists just a bit, and the door is pulled open, as soon as she spots the familiar face, she immediately began practically shouting her news.
“Godson! It’s weird…! The portal! It’s…” Twilight slowly shifted her focus lower, noticing the clothes he wore, or rather, the lack of clothes he wore. “...uh…”
Godson looked down at his shorts, then back up at the mare in front of him. “...What? Haven’t you seen a shirtless human before?”
“Uh… No… And I don’t think I ever want to after now…” Twilight shook her head. “But, seriously… The portal, Godson!”
“What abou—”
“It’s opened again! All by itself!”
Godson raised an eyebrow. “What do you mean it’s opened by itself...? What portal exactly are we talking about?”
“You know how I opened the portal once to bring you here, and again to bring your dog?”
“Yeah…?”
“Well, it appears that the portals were never fully closed.” Twilight explained. “They seem to have left some remains, and with enough time, they eventually grew enough into their own fully fledged portal.”
“Alright, so we’ll just close it and there won’t be any harm done.” Godson shrugged.
“That’s the problem.” Twilight countered. “The portal’s moving around on it’s own, since it isn’t being held down by someone casting the spell to open it in the first place.”
“So then why are you talking to me?” Godson asked somewhat loudly. “If the portal’s moving around, shouldn’t you be finding it!?”
“Yeah, uh. That’s another thing…”
Godson sighed softly. “You can’t find it, can you?”
Twilight shook her head. “Oh, no. Quite the opposite, really. See, the the portal’s kinda decided it wants to be invisible. So it’s not like I can find it super easily.”
“You’re making it sound like the portal’s a living being, Twilight.” Godson tilted his head to the side.
“At this point, I wouldn’t doubt it if it was…” Twilight commented. “But, anyway, I need to, uh, ‘scan’ a few magic signatures in order to track down the portal.”
“And how exactly do you plan on doing that?”
“Well. I have to scan the magic signatures of any object that came out of the first two portals.” Twilight placed a thinking hoof on her chin. “Maybe only one, though I’m not entirely sure, since this new portal is a mix of both of the remains of the first two.”
“So, basically, you need to ‘scan’ both me and my dog.”
“Yeah, basically.” Twilight nodded sheepishly.
“Mk.” Godson nodded back. “Just give me a second to grab Linda.”
Before Twilight could say anything else, the door was immediately shut, leaving the mare alone in silence.
Meanwhile, inside his home. Godson sighed. “So much for napping with my marefriend...”
He walked over to his bedroom, where aforementioned marefriend was already fast asleep, carrying a content smile. As he slowly walked closer to the bed, the mare slowly reached out her hoof, searching for her human. When she was not able to find him, she let out a soft groan. While he had found the sight to be adorable, he felt bad that he wouldn’t be able to keep her company.
Returning back to the task at hand, he lifted the blankets ever-so-slowly, and grabbed his dog from the bed. Linda huffed a bit over being awoken from her own slumber, then slowly woke up as she was carried out of the room.
On the way out, he grabbed a nearby shirt, and took it with him. Once he was back at the door, he twisted the knob, and opened it once more.
“Oh.” Twilight blinked. “For a second I thought you forgot about me…”
“Nah.” Godson shook his head. “It just took me a minute to get to Linda without waking up Dash.”
“Rainbow Dash is sleeping?”
“Uh…” Godson paused for a moment, then nodded. “Yeah. I was gonna nap with her, but then you showed up with the whole portal issue…”
“Sorry…” Twilight smiled sheepishly. “You don’t have to come with, I just need t—”
“Oh, but I do have to come with.” Godson interrupted. “There’s a portal flying around to my world. I’m half-responsible for it’s existence.”
“Fair enough, I suppose…”
Twilight groaned softly, her horn illuminating as she continued to track down the magic signature of the portal. While the spell was child’s play to use, something about the whole situation seemed to bother her. And the odd feeling she’d get from the spell when indicating how close they were didn’t seem to help make things any better.
Godson, however, kept his hands in his pockets as he followed the alicorn mare. Every now and then he would look away from his path to see his own surroundings, passing by trees, buildings, even other ponies minding their own business. And every time he realized he was going off-track, he shifted his view back at the mare, and ran closer to her before he lost her altogether.
...The less she knew he nearly lost her, the better.
As they continued their path, he soon began to notice her horn had begun to glow brighter and brighter the more they walked. At one point, he wanted to poke it and see what would happen. But with the portal practically running around at the moment, he’d rather not distract her.
And then, he heard a sound. A sound he hadn’t heard in more than a year.
*BA-DING!*
Twilight jumped at the sound, immediately cancelling her tracking spell. She quickly turned around, and looked around for the sound. “What was that!?” She spoke, her eyes nearly bulging from their sockets.
Godson raised an eyebrow, the look on his face as if he knew what that sound was.
“...What?” Twilight also raised an eyebrow. “What is it?”
Godson looked down to his pocket, reaching his hand in, and pulling his phone out of it. He unlocked the device, and he was greeted to a new screen.
“New Skype Message”
The look on the human’s face gave Twilight worry. She could already tell by his sudden widened eyes that something was wrong. She was about to speak up and say something to him, but she was quickly cut off before she could even utter a sound.
“It can’t be…”
Godson slowly tapped on the screen, causing the device to redirect him to the aforementioned app. As if his eyes weren’t already wide enough, Twilight was able to discover a new height of his eyelids’ limits.
Though if she understood what he currently saw, and why it was such a shock to him, she wouldn’t have been so curious.
Shadow: WHERE THE FUCK ARE YOU
Shadow: YOU FUCKING CUBAN
He scrolled down, skipping every new message he received. Passing through until he had reached the bottom, which had their own set of messages marked with today’s date.
Shadow: …?
Shadow: Why is your status online all of a sudden…?
Shadow: Are you back…?
The more Godson began to look at the messages, the more guilt would creep up on him. Not wanting to respond, he shook his head, returned his phone to ‘standby’, and shoved it back into his pocket.
“I-It’s… nothing, Twilight…” Godson spoke softly. “...Don’t worry about it.”
“Are you sure?” Twilight cocked her head to the side. “It looked like you were freaking out just a bit, there.”
“It’s nothing.” Godson deadpanned. “I’m sure.”
“Oh…” Twilight’s ears flopped back. “A-Alright then…” She turned around slowly, and began using her spell once more. “...Now I’m gonna have a hard time trying to find it aga—”
“I might be able to find it…”
Twilight’s ear twitched at the response, she turned her head back in curiousity. “How?”
Godson grabbed his phone, and showed it off to the mare.
“...Your phone?”
“Somehow, I’m getting signal from my world. It’s likely due to the portal able to send and-or receive waves?” Godson attempted to explain. “It’s, uh… both complicated and confusing.”
“Right…” Twilight nodded slowly. “Well, then, take the lead.”
Godson nearly ran as he followed a blind path, relying on his phone’s signal to reach its peak. The more they walked, the more the signal would randomly give up on how much signal it had. Causing the pair to take sharp turns in order to stay on track.
“It’s here.” He spoke suddenly, stopping in his tracks. “This is as high as my phone’s signal can go.”
Twilight raised an eyebrow, casting her tracking spell. “Well, you’re right, the magic signature seems to be stronger around this area… but I can’t seem to get an exact location on it…”
“Right.” Godson nodded, knowing Twilight could finally close the portal for good. But, the more he stood there and watched as Twilight began preparing whatever it was she was planning to do, he thought of something. “So... whatever it is, you said it was similar to the spell you used to get me here...” He checked with the mare, who responded with a nod. “If that’s the case… what are the chances of something… or someone falling through?”
“Uh… I’m not exactly sure. Wherever it is, it’s travelling quite a lot.” Twilight shrugged. “The odds of someone falling through it are increasing and decreasing as it goes…”
“Of course they are…” Godson groaned. “It’d be just my luck if someone I knew fell through it…”
“If so, we may not be able to return them home, regardless if you know them or not.” Twilight commented.
“Yeah, but I’d probably be better working with someone I don’t know, rather than someone I do know.” Godson huffed.
Then, suddenly, he felt something tap on his back.
“Um, excuse me. Do you know where the fuck I am?”
The human went wide-eyed, scared of who exactly who was behind him. Knowing he’d have to do it sooner or later, he turned around slowly. And sighed deeply upon finally seeing who it was.
“Of course it’d be you… Well, better you than Ish, I suppose…”
Author's Note
Whoops! IRL stuff got in the way and decided to make me late in posting this final chapter of Arc 1, my bad!
Also, if you're about to yell at me for not posting any new chapters while still keeping the "incomplete" tag? You may wanna read this (https://www.fimfiction.net/blog/601258/hilie-arc-1-is-complete-now-the-real-fun-begins), then...

//-------------------------------------------------------//
            Chapter 2-1: A Shadow's Tale (Pt.1)            
//-------------------------------------------------------//
Chapter 2-1: A Shadow's Tale (Pt.1)
*Shadow is now Online.*
Ishtaba: Sup Shadow
Shadow: Hai
Quigzerz: Haif
Shadow: o look a quigzerz
Quigzerz: lol
Shadow: so how are things
Ishtaba: things are same as usual
Quigzerz: Cuban still gone?
Ishtaba: ofc quigz, that fag hasn’t logged on in months. I say he’s dead.
Trey: Ish wtf
Ishtaba: Trey he’s not even answering texts, even storm’s erection spam hasn’t gotten his attention. If I’d gotten that much spam I’d at least tell him to stfu but he hasn’t.
Shadow: I just had the funniest thought.
Ishtaba: And that is?
Quigzerz: That Godson finally played conductor with his waifu?
Shadow: yeah close enough
Ishtaba: lmao he was always trying to prove he wasn’t faking those pictures.
Quigzerz: fck idfk how to use photoshop even, but they look real.
Ishtaba: It’s been months and you STILL don’t believe it’s photoshopped?
Quigzerz: bra have you SEEN them? They honestly look real.
Trey: What pictures?
Ishtaba: Have we not sent trey the pictures?
Quigzerz: fck if i know
Shadow: Not that I know of…
Ishtaba: LMAO TREY’S STILL OUT OF THE LOOP
Trey: Wait what loop?
Quigzerz: Fruit loops, trey. Fruit loops. :3
Ishtaba: Shadow send him a couple of pics.
Trey: Pics of what?  
Ishtaba: Okay so do you remember that dare that Godson did for Shadow  
Quigzerz: Now i want cereal…  
Trey: Not really…
Ishtaba: k basically Shadow dared Godson to take over the world of My Little Pony
Trey: wtf?
Ishtaba: About 5 minutes later he comes back and says he did it, and then sends some pictures.
Quigzerz: Isn’t five minutes enough proof he didn’t photoshop the pics?
Ishtaba: nah man he must’ve had them prior to the dare.
Shadow sent PonyPics.zip
Shadow: photoshopping pics of himself into Equestria before I dared him? Yeah no that doesn’t sound like him.
Ishtaba: Then what do you think happened?
Shadow: idfk
Ishtaba: exactly
Trey: idk, they look photoshopped.
Ishtaba: SEE I TOLD YOU THEY WERE PHOTOSHOPPED
Trey: but
Ishtaba: Sh*t he said ‘but’.
Trey: at the same time they don’t.
Ishtaba: the f*ck trey, you can’t say they’re both photoshopped and not photoshopped.
Trey: idk then
Shadow: gg
Ishtaba: welp I’m the only one who believes they’re photoshopped.
Quigzerz: Has Storm seen them yet?
Ishtaba: idk actually, shadow just sent it to the entire chat so storm could be looking at them even as we speak.
Storm: Yeah they’re photoshopped.
Ishtaba: AYYY I’M NOT THE ONLY ONE WHO SEES IT
Shadow: wat.
Quigzerz: waht
Storm: Thing is they’re photoshopped so good to the point where it DOESN’T look photoshopped.
Ishtaba: lolwhat
Storm: I’m surprised those “experts” that Shadow sent the pics over to didn’t notice it.
Shadow: You’re forgetting I photoshop 24/7 too, storm. I'm one of the "experts" who checked it.
Storm: Then how did you NOT notice these are photoshopped?
Shadow: How DID you notice they were photoshopped in the first place?
Storm: If you want I can send you the evidence.
Shadow: Yes, I would like you to show me where the evidence of it being photoshopped is.
Storm: k just a minute
Ishtaba: PROVE HIM WRONG STORM, DON’T MAKE ME LOOK LIKE AN IDIOT
Quigzerz: Fck if i know, He might be wrong tho
Ishtaba: quigz please don’t jinx it ;n;
Quigzerz: lol
Storm sent evidence.zip
Storm: There you go. There should be a imperfection right around Luna’s right (facing you) wing.
Shadow: Storm. I don’t see any imperfections, you sure it's not just your sh*t monitor dropping pixels?
Ishtaba: SH*T QUIGZ WHY’D YOU JINX IT
Quigzerz: lol
Storm: My monitors aren’t sh*t, maybe it’s just your pixel perfection.
Shadow: yeah no I still don’t see it…
Storm: Ish, you see it, right?
Ishtaba: o.o
Quigzerz: Storm I don't see anything wrong.
Ishtaba: Yeah Storm I don’t see it in this picture.
Storm: Right, f*ck it, call me up whenever we’re done talking about photoshopped pics.
Storm is now AFK.
Trey: Well… that happened…
Ishtaba: GG
Quigzerz: lol
Shadow: k well I’mma brb
Ishtaba: k cya
*Shadow is now Offline.*
Shadow closed the skype window, blocking off any form of communication with anyone who wished to talk to him. He looked back at the ‘evidence’ that Storm had sent him, zooming in and out, trying to see if he could find any imperfections that his friend had claimed to have found so easily.
“I dunno what he’s talking about…” He thought. “There’s nothing here. No imperfections, nothing. It’s completely legit…”
The only problem with his investigation, despite it looking convincingly real, is that it shouldn’t.
“There is no way that he---” He attempted to speak, before being interrupted hears the crashing of pots and pans falling onto the floor as his cat flips shit. “DA HELL YOU DOIN’ CAT?” He yelled, quickly getting up as he races out of his room full speed at the cat, going for an amazing field goal, substituting a ball for the cat in the distance.
Unfortunately, his clumsiness takes over, and he trips on air flying through the air. He closed his eyes as he braced for impact onto the tile floor, instead of hitting the ground, he feels like he is falling for a moment. As soon as he opens his eyes, he smashes his head onto a rock as the rest of him lands on what felt like soft, plush grass.
“...the magic signature seems to be stronger around this area… but I can’t seem to get an exact location on it…” A female voice spoke.
“Right.” A male voice cut in, pausing shortly before speaking up once more. “So... whatever it is, you said it was similar to the spell you used to get me here… If that’s the case… what are the chances of something… or someone falling through?”
“Uh… I’m not exactly sure. Wherever it is, it’s travelling quite a lot.” The first voice replied. “The odds of someone falling through it are increasing and decreasing as it goes…”
Shadow groaned softly as he slowly removed his face from the rock. Rubbing the area he’d get a bruise later, he looked up in front of him, noticing another human not too far away. He slowly began getting up until he stood on his two legs.
“Of course they are…” The second voice groaned, which Shadow was able to identify belonging to the human in front of him. “It’d be just my luck if someone I knew fell through it…”
“If so, we may not be able to return them home, regardless if you know them or not.” The other voice spoke again, though Shadow didn’t care to look who it was, but instead focused on walking up to the man in front of him.
“Yeah, but I’d probably be better working with someone I don’t know, rather than someone I do know.”
Shadow tapped the human on the back. “Um, excuse me. Do you know where the fuck I am?”
The human turned around slowly, bracing himself for the worst case scenario. Then, he narrowed his eyes at the sight of Shadow.
“Of course it’d be you…” He sighed deeply, a sudden rush of guilt seeming to fall onto his face. Shadow immediately identified the man in front of him. “Well, better you than Ish, I suppose…”
“Jorge?” Shadow stepped back in awe. “Is that really…” He quickly looked around him, noticing the world he stood in looked like the edited pic— "So it is real?!"
“Wow…” Godson went wide-eyed. “No one’s called me that in… what… a year and three months, now?”
“Isn’t your name Godson, though?” The voice behind him asked. Shadow looked at the being behind him, realizing exactly who it was.
"Wait... There is no way..." Shadow gawked, "Twilight is here...? So... I really am in Equestria.."
“And here I thought you’d say something along the lines of—”
“Am I dreaming?” Shadow interrupted. “There’s no way this can be real… right?”
“Annnnd you beat me to it…” Godson crossed his arms. “Hate to tell ya, but you’re not dreaming.”
Shadow looked at the alicorn mare behind Godson, and quickly remembered something that might be important. "Oh shi.. Jorge.. Does she um.. Know about the bet..?" He inquired, gulping in fear.
“Hang on a sec…” Twilight interjected. “Didn’t you mention a bet once, Godson?”
“Maybe she wouldn’t have remembered, had you not just mentioned it.” Godson rolled his eyes.
Shadow’s eyes shrank to the size of peanuts. “Well…” He spoke softly. “Can I just say one thing?”
“Shoot.”
“I’LL BE SEEIN' YA AROUND!”
In an instant, Shadow bolted off in the opposite direction, only to trip over the rock he’d previously landed on.
“Yikes…” Godson winced, merely watching him land on the ground caused him a small amount of pain. “That’s… gotta hurt…”
"Someone really needs to remove this damn rock..." Shadow grumbled as he slowly came to stand on his two feet again.
Twilight’s eyes widened as soon as she remembered what Godson had told her a long time ago.
“Is he the one…” She raised an eyebrow. “Who dared you into taking over Equestria?”
“Pretty much.” Godson nodded.
“He’s the idiot that had you taking over Equestria for!?” Twilight shouted.
Godson simply nodded in response. “Oh. And by the way, you owe me 20 bucks, you Canadian retard.”
“Oh fuck no, not with the dollar values as they are now. Knowing you, you want $20 USD, I ain’t giving you just about $40 CAD” Shadow crossed his arms.
“Well you owe me something, then!” Godson grumbled. “Ah well, your money’s useless here in Equestria… I learned that the hard way…” He rolled his eyes.
“I’ll just get your waifu to suck your—”
Godson’s eyes widened, almost enough to compete with Twilight’s eyes. “H-How about we talk about that later…” He interrupted, nudging his head at the alicorn behind him.
“What the heck does waifu mean?” Twilight tilted her head to the side.
“Uh, nothing. It’s just a term that the two of us are familiar with.” Godson shook his head. “It’s nothing that important.”
Shadow looked down, shaking his head with a soft grin on his face.
“Anyway…” Godson attempted to change the subject. “Do you have any idea how you ended up here, Br—”
Shadow slapped Godson’s mouth with his hand. “Say my real name, and I’ll stab you.” He whispered.
“Ugh, fine.” Godson rubbed his now sore mouth. “Username, then?” He whispered back.
“Of course, it sounds cooler.” Shadow nodded.
“Eh, alright then, do you have any idea how you got here, Shadow?” Godson raised an eyebrow.
“Well...” Shadow replied slowly, rubbing the back of his head. “I went for a field goal kick on a cat and tripped on air and fell, but I fell on that damn rock instead of my floor”
“Animal abuse, much?” Godson chuckled.
“Hey!” Shadow pointed a finger at the laughing man in front of him. “In my defence… He knocked over my tacos”
“Oh, Taco abuse and animal abuse.” Godson’s chuckle slowly turned into laughter. “Oh man, that would’ve been great to see…”
“Can somepony explain to me what’s going on?” Twilight cut in, walking up to the two humans. “From what I understand… You’re the idiot…” She poked Shadow’s stomach. “...who dared this idiot?” She pointed at Godson.
“Hey!” Godson snapped back. “Back then, I had my pride to take care of!”
“Pride? You never had pride to begin with, Jorge.” Shadow commented, only to be poked again by Twilight.
“Still waiting on an answer…” Twilight growled, growing more impatient as time went on. She then quickly caught notice of something, and looked at the other human. “And what’s this whole ‘hor-hay’ thing?”
“Huh?” Godson looked at the alicorn mare with a confused expression. “Oh… It’s… uh...”
“Its his real name,” interrupted Shadow, “Did he never tell you what his real name was?”
“Don’t even get me started with you, ‘Shadow’.” Godson retorted.
“Hold it just a second…” Twilight cut in once more. “Your ‘real name’?”
“gg Jorge.” Shadow added in. “You’re fucked now.”
“Don’t think you got off so easily!” Twilight turned to face him.
“Well if that stupid rock wasn’t there, I would’ve been long gone by now!” Shadow countered.
“It’s not even the rock.” Godson closed his eyes as he shook his head. With a deep breath, he sighed. “Twilight, the portal’s moved… hasn’t it…”
Twilight looked up at her horn, which was no longer glowing. “Oh boy…” Twilight groaned. “Check your phone, see if you still have signal.”
Godson grabbed his phone from his pocket, bringing it close to his face. He opened his eyes, looking directly at the signal status.
“Barely.” He monotoned.
“Uh… Can someone explain what’s going on?” Shadow asked dumbfoundedly.
Twilight looked at the confused human. “Oh. Well, basically, there’s a portal connecting both Equestria and your world, and it’s moving around in both worlds. It’s likely while you were running, the portal was lined up perfectly for you to fall right through.”
“What she said.” Godson pointed a thumb at the mare next to him. Quickly shifting his attention back to his phone. “Hm. I wonder if I could make use of this signal and the portal moving around…” He muttered to himself, quickly putting his new random plan into action.
Twilight shrugged at his current actions, despite not having her ‘Jorge’ question answered, she worried more about the idiot that fell through the portal.
“You know you still haven’t answered my question, right?” She inquired.
“What question? You asked a question?” Shadow blinked.
Twilight narrowed her eyes. “Don’t you dare play dumb with me, ‘Shadow’...”
“I’m not... I legitimately forgot already...” Shadow replied with a shrug.
“That quick?” Twilight cocked her head to the side. “Geez…” With a roll of her eyes, she looked back at the Canadian. “Are you the idiot who dared Godson to take over Equestria?”
“Uh… Maybe...” Shadow answered, looking side to side for an easy way to escape the wrath he feared would come.
“That explains everything.” Twilight’s horn glowed, as Shadow braced himself for the worst possible thing to happen.
Luckily for him, the worst thing he imagined would happen, didn’t happen. Instead, he felt a soft tingling on his arm.
“Twilight?” Godson spoke up. “The heck are you doing?”
Suddenly, Twilight’s horn stopped glowing. “There.” She smirked. “You two aren’t worth the extra effort, so I just did something else instead.”
Shadow immediately lifted his sleeve, looking at his arm, with the word “IDIOT” tattooed on it.
“Of course…” Shadow sighed.
“What’s it say?” Godson asked curiously.
Shadow reluctantly showed off the tattoo on his arm, only for Godson to spontaneously burst into laughter at the sight of it.
"It's not funny..." He groaned.
“You're right! It's hilarious!" Godson said through laughs. "Oh geez. That’s great.” His laughter slowly died down. Then quickly realized something. “Wait…” He looked at his own arm, the words “BIGGER IDIOT” tattooed on it.
“DAMMIT TWILIGHT” He shouted. “WHAT DID I DO TO DESER—”
“Jorge.”
“WHAT?” Godson looked at Shadow. “CAN’T YOU SEE I’M YELLING HE—”
“She’s gone, dumbass.”
Godson looked at where Twilight used to be standing, only to find Shadow was right.
“What did yours say?” Shadow asked.
“Screw you, I’m not telling.”
Author's Note
Whew, Arc 2. This one's gonna be quite the story, now.
"A Shadow's Tale" is gonna be a three parter. So, be ready for the next two chapters. :3

//-------------------------------------------------------//
            Chapter 2-2: A Shadow's Tale (Pt.2)            
//-------------------------------------------------------//
Chapter 2-2: A Shadow's Tale (Pt.2)
“...And then, I teleported back here, leaving the two with their tattooes!” Twilight finished her story, falling on the floor as she bursted into total laughter.
Dash laughed softly. “Wow, Twilight. I gotta admit, I thought you’d be too much of an egghead to pull a move like that.” She then thought about how the two humans’ reacted, causing her to laugh a little more. “Is that whole tattoo thing permanent? Cause, uh… That’s gonna be really awkward at times..”
Twilight’s laughter slowly died down. “Nah, it’s temporary.” She got back up on all fours. “Godson’s tattoo lasts for the next few hours, and shadow’s lasts for about… uh… 3 to 4 days, somewhere around there…”
“Why does Shadow’s last longer than Godson’s?”
“Oh, cause he’s the one who dared Godson into taking over Equestria.”
“Really?” Dash raised an eyebrow. “Wow, I wonder what they put into the bet.”
“Something about… twenty dollars?” Twilight shrugged. “I didn’t quite understand that.”
”JORGE YOU FAGGOT GET BACK OVER HERE!”
Dash’s ear twitched. “Did you hear that?”
“Yeah... It was kinda faint though.”
“Not to me…”
”SCREW YOU SHADOW YOU CAN’T LOOK AT MY TATTOO.”
”I SHOWED YOU MINE, YOU DICK!”
”THAT’S WHAT SHE SAID!”
“It sounds like they’re getting closer…” Twilight analysed.
”YOU’LL NEVER CATCH ME ALIVE!”
”THAT CAN BE ARRANGED!”
Dash walked to the door, opening it enough to peek her head through. Only to see her human being chased by another human behind him.
“DASHIE!” Godson shouted at the mare. “HALP ME!”
“YOUR WAIFU AIN’T GONNA SAVE YOU THIS TIME, JORGE!” Shadow shouted, not too far behind.
Dash kept a serious expression throughout their chase. She was tempted to close the door and let the two battle it out on their own, but at the same time, she didn’t want to have an injured human to worry about.
She opened the door all the way, moving out of the way for both the humans to run through.
Once both of the humans are close enough, Twilight casts a spell to freeze the both of them in their tracks; literally.
Dash closed the door, walking up to the two frozen humans. “Alright, listen up, you.” She pointed at the man behind Godson. “I’d let you sort out whatever issues you have over this one here.” She nudged her head in Godson’s direction. “But then I’d have to deal with his constant whining. Seriously, he bruises way too easily.” She added, rolling her eyes. “Fair?”
"Oh, hey Dash, Jorgy-boi over here make you his waifu yet?" Shadow replied with a giddy grin.
“You are so lucky you’re frozen…” Godson grumbled, only to get softly slapped in the back of the head by Dash’s wing.
“Shut up.” Dash commanded. She turned her focus back to Shadow. “What do you mean ‘make me his waifu’? What the hay is a ‘waifu’?”
“Nevermind…” Shadow rolled his eyes. “Fine, I’ll leave him alone."
“Good.” Dash nodded. “Nice use of that spell, Twilight. I wasn’t even expecting that.”
“Pretty basic spell, actually.” Twilight smiled. “Should I unfreeze them?”
“Probably should.” Dash replied. “Cause if we don’t, Godson will just start throwing a temper tantrum.”
“I don’t throw temper tantrums!” Godson retorted as the spell was slowly removed from him.
“I’m messing with you, geez.” Dash laughed softly. “After all this time we’ve been dating, you still don’t know when I’m messing around, huh?”
“No…”
“I can see that.” Dash giggled. “Now, come here, you ‘bigger idiot’.” She stood up on her rear legs, reaching her forelegs out for a hug. He obeyed, walking to her until he was close enough for her to pull him close to her.
“That’s what your tattoo said!?” Shadow stifled a laugh. “Ha! Yours is worse than mine!”
“Except yours lasts longer.” Dash peeked her head above Godson’s shoulder with a smirk, then softly closed her eyes as she rested her head on it.
“Oh, they’re temporary…” Godson thought aloud.
“Mhm.” Dash hummed. “Yours lasts for the next few hours... “
“Wait, why does mine last longer?” Shadow asked.
“Two reasons.” Twilight answered. “One, he wasn’t the one who came up with the dare. Two, I knew Dash was gonna complain about him having it for the next few days.”
“Do you know how awkward it would be seeing him with that ‘bigger idiot’ tattoo while w—”
“Anyways…” Twilight interrupted. “I’m sure you must have a lot of questions… so—”
“How the fuck do I get home?”
Twilight jerked her head back at the human’s sudden vulgarity. “Yeah… about that…”
”OW!”
”THAT’S WHAT YOU GET FOR LEAVING ME ALONE IN BED!”
“I’m stuck here, aren’t I?”
Twilight simply nodded.
“Of-fucking-course I am.” Shadow rolled his eyes. “And I was starting to think Jorge went MIA just because he didn’t want to go back.”
“Now that you mention that whole ‘horhay’ thing…” Twilight brought a hoof to her chin. “You said that was Godson’s real name?”
“I was getting ready to say something about that.” Dash jumped in on their conversation. She pulled back softly from her human’s embrace. “What’s that all about?”
“Now you’re fucked, Jorge.” Shadow smirked evilly. “gg.”
Godson let go of the mare, and turned around to face the man behind him. “So when I try to call you by your real name, you threaten to stab me. But when you say my real name, it’s perfectly fine?”
“Yep.” Shadow nodded.
“Screw you, that’s not fair at all.” Godson grumbled.
“Never said it was fair, now did I?” Shadow countered.
“Both of you, shut up and stop trying to dodge the question!” Twilight interjected.
“Okay! Fine! Yes, ‘Jorge’ is my real name!” Godson finally admitted. “Happy now?”
“So why would you lie to us about your name?” Twilight asked.
“Because, one, ‘Godson’ sounded cooler at the time.” Godson pointed a finger at the sky. “Two.” Another finger was raised. “I went with that name in case crap didn’t end well, no one would be able to ask around for ‘Godson’.” He placed a hand on the back of his neck. “I uh… kinda regret doing so in the long run…”
“Why’s that?” Dash jumped in.
Godson looked at her. “Do you know how awkward it is hearing you shout ‘Godson’ every time we’r—”
“Jorge.” Shadow interrupted. “We don’t need to know about your personal life with your waifu...”
Dash blinked. “Is he talking about me?”
“Yeah. He’s talking about you.” Godson confirmed.
“So ‘waifu’ means marefriend?” Twilight queried.
“Yeah, sure, why not?” Shadow replied.
“So, should I call you ‘Jorge’, then?” Dash cocked her head to the side.
“If you want?” Godson shrugged. “If you’re more comfortable calling me ‘Godson’, then go ahead.”
“How about I call you ‘idiot’, and we’re good?” Dash teased.
“Please don’t.” Godson frowned.
“Relax. I won’t...” Dash softly nudged his arm. “...Jorge.” She raised an eyebrow. “Eh… Kinda sounds better than ‘Godson’, if you ask me…”
“Wait, that’s it?” Shadow gawked. “No one’s pissed at him for lying!?”
“Why do you think he has that tattoo on his arm?” Twilight answered.
“Really? Just a ‘bigger idiot’ tattoo?” Shadow sighed. “Pathetic…”
“What do you expect us to do? Send him to tartarus just for lying?” Dash narrowed her eyes. “I’m not gonna send my boyfriend away just for lying about a dumb name. What about you, Shadow?”
“Shit...” Shadow grumbled.
“Why don’t you use your real name, anyway?” Godson inquired. “At least I had a reason the first time I came here.”
“Shadow sounds more badass.” Shadow crossed his arms.
“Whatever.” ~~Godso~~ Jorge rolled his eyes. “Shouldn’t we be hunting down that portal? Y’know, in case anyone else falls through?”
“Oh, please…” Twilight scoffed. “The chances of someone else falling through ar—”
“Still increasing and decreasing, meaning it’s a completely random chance of someone else falling through.” ~~God~~ Jorge interrupted. “And if you think Shadow is annoying…”
”Hey!”
“...then you won’t want to meet any of my other friends…” ~~G~~ Jorge concluded. “...Well, except Trey… He’s fine.”
“Eh. I can’t really imagine Trey here.” Shadow added. “Could you imagine if Ish were here, though?”
“I swear, if he falls through…” Jorge groaned, softly facepalming at the thought.
“Alright, I’ll send a letter over to Celestia to send out royal guards to help look out.” Twilight stated. “For all we know, the portal’s probably not even in Ponyville anymore.”
“What happens when the portal’s found, then?” Jorge asked curiously.
“I’ll fly there as fast as I can, and do everything I can to close the portal. It’s mostly just magic residue, so I should be able to control it...” Twilight answered.
“Should be able to control it…?” Shadow asked, sounding slightly worried.
“Well… yeah.” Twilight hesitantly nodded. “It’s magic residue from a spell I casted. Therefore, I should be able to control it.”
“And if you can’t…?” Shadow asked once more.
“Then… uh…” Twilight smiled sheepishly.
“Nice…” Shadow chuckled. “Let’s hope Twilight doesn’t screw the fuck up and doom us all.”
Jorge widened his eyes. “Woah, uh…”
Twilight cleared her throat. “I’m not a princess for nothing, y’know.”
”Oh good she passed it off like nothing…”
“You’re a princess, eh?” Shadow lifted an eyebrow. “Princess of what, exactly?”
“Er… Uh…”
“I rest my case.” Shadow concluded, giving a knowing smirk.
“The hell, Shadow?” Jorge cut in. “Why do you give every new person you meet such a hard time?” Suddenly, he had an evil idea. “What, are you trying to hint out the obvious?” He grew an evil smirk as he finished his sentence.
“What’s obvious...?” Shadow’s pupils shrunk, fearing of what his friend’s evil smirk would lead to.
“You like Twilight, don’t ya?” Jorge concluded, putting his evil plan into action.
“Uh… What are you doing?” Dash whispered in his ear.
“Just follow my lead.” Jorge whispered back.
“Jorge, are you high on some kind of pony drug or something?” Shadow’s pupils returned to normal.
“Oh, come on.” Jorge scoffed. “It’s obvious you have a thing for Twilight.”
“No… I don’t…” Shadow shook his head. “Seriously, you’re high, aren’t you?”
“Yeah, Shadow!” Dash smirked as well. “I can see it from a mile away.”
"Dash, did Jorge share his drugs with you? Cause you seem high, too." Shadow retorted.
“I can’t see it.” Twilight bluntly stated.
“Have you dated anyone, Twilight?” Jorge queried.
“No…” Twilight shook her head. “But that doesn’t me—”
“Then of course you can’t see it!” Dash interrupted. “Look at me and Jorge, we’ve been dating for almost a year.”
“Pretty sure we’ve picked up a few things by experience.” Jorge added.
Shadow finally figured where they were going with this, in an instant, his pupils shrunk once more, down to the size of acorns. “I don’t thi—”
“Eh, he doesn’t really seem to be my type.” Twilight interrupted. “Look at him, he’s a bigger idiot than Jorge.”
“I’d say something against that. But I’ve given up on trying to prove otherwise.” Jorge sighed.
“Relax, I know you’re not an idiot…” Dash said in a reassuring tone, wrapping a wing around him.
“Thanks…” Jorge smiled softly at the mare’s actions.
“No problem… idiot.” Dash joked.
“Me?” Shadow brought his hands to his chest. “A bigger idiot than Jorge?” He pointed at the aforementioned human. “Oh hell no. I am not a bigger idiot than Jorge!”
“Well, so far, you’ve been doing a bad job at showing it.” Dash snickered.
“What can I do to prove it, then?” Shadow brought his hands to his hips. “Whatever it is, I can do it.”
“I’m… gonna go write that letter…” Twilight blinked, slowly walking away as she tried to escape from this conversation.
Everyone else, however, didn’t bother to say anything, they continued in their useless debate.
“You know you’re stuck here, right?” Jorge asked to verify. “Where exactly do you plan on living?”
“Uh… I don’t fucking know…” Shadow retorted.
“I hear Applejack wouldn’t mind the extra help.” Dash commented.
“I’d prefer a cardboard box, thank you.” Shadow crossed his arms.
“What’s the matter? Don’t feel like fu—” Jorge caught himself. “Crap, I almost did it again…” He shook his head, returning back to the topic. “Don’t feel like bucking trees?”
“Whatever that is… No, just give me a fucking cardboard box, and we’re good.” Shadow grumbled.
“What about Pinkie Pie?” Jorge threw the idea out. “I bunked with her until I got on my feet?”
“Did you say something about how she would probably call you ‘Goddy’ before you went MIA?” Shadow questioned. “I don’t want some weird-ass girly nickname.”
“How would one make a girly nickname out of ‘Shadow’?” Jorge inquired. “It’s nearly impossible to come up with something like—”
“Jorge, this is Pinkie we are talking about..” Shadow countered. “For all we know, she could be listening in on us, right now.”
“How do you know about...oh, that’s right, I forgot that your world had us as a cartoon, entertainment, thing…” Dash groaned. “I was fine not remembering that, by the way…”
“Okay, then what about bunking at my place?” Jorge asked. “There’s plenty of ro—”
“Still waiting on that cardboard box.”
“If it’s that big of a problem, I have a guest bedroom.” Twilight walked back, rolling her eyes. “You could sleep there. Unless you’d still prefer that cardboard box…”
Shadow weighed the two options. Living in a cardboard box, which he’d probably burn later on in the long run, or sleep in Twilight’s guest room. Both seemed like pretty bad choices, regardless, but they were better than bunking with Jorge or Pinkie.
Eventually, he came to a decision. “Yeah. I guess I’ll sleep there…”
"Oooh. You’d like that, wouldn’t you?" Dash smirked.
Shadow glared at the mare. “So this was what you two were planning…”
Twilight looked at the smirking couple, then back at Shadow. “You do realize you’d need to help around, right?”
“Oh, so, chores?” Shadow quipped.
“If by chores, you mean besides helping around with cleaning?” Twilight tilted her head. “Yeah, sure.”
“Then… help with what, exactly?” Shadow worriedly asked.
“Oh, basically Spike’s job as my assistant every now and then.” Twilight shrugged. “I know he always wants to help and all, but, he needs a break every now and then.” She mused. “Besides, if you want to prove you’re not such an idiot, then helping me out as my assistant should be enough.”
“Really?” Shadow queried. “That doesn’t sound too bad.”
Suddenly, the sound of burping was heard, and shortly after, Spike walked into the room.
“Y’know, one of these days you’ll be sending a letter to Celestia. What if I’m not around to help send it?” Spike muttered, handing Twilight a letter. “Can Shadow breathe fire? I don’t think so…”
“Relax. He’s only doing the jobs that I wouldn’t want to bother you with.” Twilight sighed. “It’s not like he’s completely taking over.”
“It’s Owlicious all over again…” Spike groaned, returning to where he originally was.
Twilight rolled her eyes. She used her magic to levitate the letter, which opened entirely on it’s own. “Well, that was fast…”
“What is it?” Jorge inquired.
Twilight looked up from her letter. “It’s Celestia. They found the portal.”
“That’s great!” Jorge cheered. “What are you waiting for, go close it! I’ll stay here with Shadow. Cause, I don’t feel like going anywhere... ”
“Alright…” Twilight closed her eyes, teleporting the letter somewhere else. She then looked at Shadow. “While I’m gone, Shadow…” Her horn illuminated once more, and with a flash of light, a piece of paper appeared in front of him. “Here’s some stuff for you to do.”
“Wait, what?” Shadow grabbed the list.
“And I expect all this to be done before I get back.”
“WHAT!?” Shadow shouted. “HOW THE FUCK DOES THIS HELP ME PROVE I’M NOT AN IDIOT!?”
“It doesn’t.” Twilight deadpanned. “It’s just that I’ve been making Spike do chores for a while now. You wanna live here? Then it’s your turn.”
Shadow looked at her, then back at the list. “Fuck…”
“It’s not that bad.” Twilight shook her head. “They’re all really simple chores. You could get them done in no time at all.”
“Ugh…”
“Anyway, I better hurry up and get to that portal before someone else falls through.” Twilight noted, making her way out the door. “I’ll send status reports whenever something major happens!”
“‘Kay.” Jorge nodded, waiting for the door to close shut.
Once it did, he walked up to Shadow, who was still complaining about the list.
“Lemme see that friggin list.” He snatched the piece of paper from Shadow’s hand. “Feed Owlicious, clean the dishes, pick up the books lying around…” He read. “These are all basic chores, why are you complaining so much?”
“They all require effort…” Shadow groaned.
Jorge patted him on the back. “At least you’re living under Twilight’s roof. I actually had to work until I got on my feet. Like, bake cakes and clean all kinds of messes.”
“How’d that turn out?” Shadow raised an eyebrow.
“These chores on your list? They’re child’s play compared to what I do around my house.”
“How so?”
“Living with Dash has it’s pros and cons. The pros outweigh the cons by a ton, but, let’s just say one of the cons is basically needing to have a constant supply of bleach…”
Author's Note
Part Two of Three.

//-------------------------------------------------------//
            Chapter 2-3: A Shadow's Tale (Pt.3)            
//-------------------------------------------------------//
Chapter 2-3: A Shadow's Tale (Pt.3)
“Done.” Shadow fell back on a nearby couch, sighing at all the work he had done. “Why the hell didn’t you tell me Twilight had a fuckin’ owl, Jorge?”
“Was the name ‘Owlicious’ not obvious enough?” Jorge scoffed, walking up to the bookshelf. He placed a hand on his chin, inspecting through the list of books to see what he should grab.
“You’ve really gotten used to working, huh?” Shadow raised an eyebrow. “Last time I talked to you, you were the laziest person I knew.”
“You try going nearly a year without computers and games.” Jorge countered. “...Oh wait, you’re stuck here anyway…” He shook his head. “Yeah. At least they have TV in this world.”
“Seriously?” Shadow queried. “They don’t have computers, but they have fucking television? If that’s the case, then… where does Twilight keep the TV in this house?”
“HA!” Jorge instinctively shouted. “Do you even know who you’re living with?”
“Twilight’s always too focused on her books and magic.” Dash rolled her eyes at her human’s attitude towards his friend.
“The day Twilight gets a TV is the day I’ll eat my shoe.” Jorge boasted.
“That can be arranged.” Shadow smirked.
“Ooh, do I smell another bet coming along?” Dash smirked along with him.
“Considering he still owes me from the first bet…” Jorge turned around. “Why the heck not?”
“If I get Twilight to get a TV…” Shadow began. “Not only do you gotta eat your own shoe, but I won’t have to pay you anything from the first bet.”
“And if I win. You’ll owe double.” Jorge smiled evilly.
“That’s it?” Dash cut in. “Getting Twilight to get a TV. Pathetic.”
“Then what do you have in mind?” The two humans asked in unison.
“Instead of trying to get Twilight to get a TV…” Dash grew her own evil grin. “Shadow has to try to get Twilight out on a date.”
“Wat.” Shadow blinked. “First you get me living at Twilight’s, now you want me to date her?”
“Yeah. Even I didn’t expect that, Dashie.” Jorge added.
“What’s the matter? It’s only one date.” Dash’s evil grin grew more as she continued. “How hard could it possibly be?”
“Very hard, in case you didn’t notice, she’s not exactly happy with me daring Jorgy-Boi over here to try and take over Equestria. Even though… to be honest... I didn’t think he could, nor that this place even existed.”
“If it’s as hard as you say, then what makes you think you can get Twilight to buy a TV?” Dash questioned.
“Buying a TV seems easier to do, in my opinion.” Jorge replied.
“But don’t you want to win the bet?” Dash queried.
“Of cour—”
“Then, c’mon, Jorge. Let your good ol’ pal Shadow speak for himself.” Dash chided. “What do you say, Shadow? Either get Twilight out on a date, or you’ll still owe him.”
“I hate letting Jorge win, so... Fuck it. Fine, I’ll do the dare your way Dash.” Shadow groaned, knowing he was gonna be in for possibly the hardest challenge of his life.
“Deal.” Dash lifted a hoof, which Shadow grabbed a hold of. Hand/hoofshakes aside, the bet was made, and there was no turning back.
“I’m going to regret this…” Shadow thought aloud.
“Aw, c’mon!” Dash said in a reassuring tone. “Look at it this way: If you win, Jorge has to eat his shoe, and you won’t owe him anything. Doesn’t that sound like a good deal?”
“Not really.” Shadow shook his head. “How can I be sure Jorge will actually eat his shoe?”
“Do you know who you’re talking to?” Dash smirked once more. “I’ll make sure he eats his shoe if he loses.”
“You sure you want someone who ate their shoe eatin—”
Dash smacked his mouth. “Finish that sentence, and the bet’s off.”
“Then what are you gonna do when he eats his sho—”
“I’ll make him take a gallon of mouthwash.” Dash rolled her eyes.
“Wait, what?” Jorge went wide-eyed.
Dash looked at the wide-eyed human. “What, did you actually think you were gonna bring that shoe-infested mouth anywhere near me?” She scoffed. “You're crazy."
“That’s if I lose, Rainbow!” Jorge pointed out. “Do you really think Shadow’s gonna actually be able to get Twilight on a date?”
“If I can be fine dating you. Then I’m pretty sure Shadow has some chance of getting at least one date with Twilight.” Dash countered.
"Oooooh, torched!" Shadow snickered.
Jorge glared at him, resisting the urge to snap back. He looked back at his marefriend. “But this is Twilight we’re talking about!” His vision snapped back to Shadow, then returned to Dash. “And this is Shadow we’re talking about!”
“Hey!” Shadow retorted. “What the hell is that supposed to mean?”
"I’m just saying Twilight’s too much of a bookworm to even think about dating.” Jorge answered. “Even more so now that she thinks of you as an idiot.”
Dash poked his arm. “Except you got the ‘bigger idiot’ tattoo.”
“My point still stands.” Jorge crossed his arms.
"So? Even with you being with Dash, I've still gotten more action than you!" Shadow boasted, smirking wildly as he made his statement. "I have hidden charm that can make anyone fall for me."
“Heh…” Dash chuckled. “I’m seriously going to doubt you’ve gotten more action.”
“Why’s that?” Shadow raised an eyebrow.
“No reason…” Dash inconspicuously looked around. “Just… gonna doubt it… That’s all…”
Shadow’s eyes widened. “Exactly how many times did yo—Nevermind, I don’t wanna know…”
“Yeah… you really don’t…” Jorge shook his head. “Anyways, I’mma head out. I have to do some shopping... "
Shadow smirked as something popped into his head. “Out of blea—”
“Shuddap!” Jorge covered his ears, running towards the door. Causing his friend to laugh at his attempts to flee.
"Good luck with the dare, Shadow!" Dash giggled, following her human out the door. “And FYI, we have plenty of bleach!”
The door slammed shut, leaving Shadow alone to himself.
Taking a deep breath, he sighed. "Well, I did all the things Twilight asked me to do... Now what?" He looked around, scanning his surroundings for something to keep him occupied. He got up from the couch, and walked to the bookshelves.
He surveyed through the vast amount of books, finding only one book to draw his attention.
“Fifty Shades of Hay, huh?” He thought aloud. “This better not be a ripoff of Shades of Grey…”
He opened the book, flipping through pages as he skimmed through the words. “Yep. It’s the same.” With a soft clap, the book was slammed shut, and returned to its home.
By the corner of his eye, he saw something purple walking by. He jerked his head to identify what the ‘something’ was.
“Oh… It’s you.” Shadow sighed a breath of relief. “For a second, I thought you were a midget barney, or something.”
Spike stopped in his tracks, looking back at him. “...What’s a ‘barney’?”
“...Nevermind.” Shadow muttered. “What’re you up to?”
“Nothing really, just gonna grab a snack.” Spike shrugged. “Seeing how you finished all the chores, I need something to do…”
“I know that feel.” Shadow admitted. “So… you’re not all pissed off because I took your job?”
“I was, but then I realized how much free time I’d have if you took over.” Spike replied. “So… Keep up the good work.” He raised his claw, doing the dragon equivalent of a thumbs up.
As Spike walked off to the kitchen, Shadow simply shrugged, and returned to what he was originally doing. He continued looking through all the books, coming across the likes of “The History of the Elements of Harmony”, “A Secret Life of Trees”, “1001 Ponies”, "Trees of the Eclipse", and many other books with large variety.
But then, he came across a rather large and odd book. As he pulled it from the shelf, he noticed it was seeming to be a magic spell book, along with a purple bookmark sticking out.
Being the curious man he is, he opened the book, stopping at where the bookmark was left. There were equations, formulas, and other things that were supposed to lead to something that caught his attention.
A transformation spell.
He looked at the equations, some were filled, others were either incomplete or simply needed the answer to complete it.
“DON’T TOUCH THAT!”
Shadow jumped at the sudden shouting. The book quickly escaped from his grasp, he quickly moved his hands in an attempt to catch it, only to make the book bounce around his desperate attempt to keep the book from falling. Soon enough, he was able to get a steady grasp of the book, huffing and puffing as he calmed down from the heat of the moment.
“The hell, Spike?” Shadow groaned.
“That’s Twilight’s spellbook! What are you doing with it?“
“Looking at it…” Shadow raised an eyebrow. “I can’t look at the book?”
“No…” Spike scratched the back of his head. “Twilight doesn’t let anypony touch her spellbook.”
“Why not?” Shadow tilted his head.
“I’m not sure.” Spike shrugged. “She just doesn’t like anypony touching it. You can even ask Go—… Jorge.”
“Well, Twilight’s not here, is she?”
“I guess not…”
“So what she doesn’t know won’t kill her, right?”
“I guess…”
“‘Kay then.” Shadow smiled at his win. He looked back at down at the unfinished page, and pointed at it. “By the way, what’s this all about?”
Spike got a hold of the book, investigating the page. “Oh. This is the transformation spell. She’s been working on this one for ages, she just hasn’t been able to figure out those last few..”
“Equations?”
“Yeah...”
“These are really simple, I know how to do all of them.” Shadow confidently beamed. “Maybe I could surprise her by finishing them before she gets back.”
“Really?” Spike gawked. “That’s great! Not even Jorge could figure it out!”
Shadow scoffed. “Jorge is an idiot. I on the other hand, am not.”
Spike walked to a nearby book stand, placing the spellbook down on it.
“Alright then. Let’s see what you can do.”
“What are we shopping for, anyways?” Dash curiously asked.
“Food, supplies,” Jorge listed. “Uh… what else…”
“Bleach?” Dash snickered.
“Nah.” Jorge shook his head. “We still have plenty of that.”
“Hm, alright.” Dash nodded, suddenly having an idea to change the subject. “So… What do you think will happen to Shadow?”
“What do you mean?”
“Like… Do you think he’ll be okay being in Equestria?” Dash raised an eyebrow.
Jorge stayed silent, thinking about his marefriend’s quesion. She looked at him with a worried expression, showing just how bad she felt for the new displaced human.
He took a deep breath, and sighed. “I’m pretty sure he’ll be fine...”
“You think so?” Dash queried.
“Yeah…” Jorge replied. “It might take him some time… but I think he’ll get used to living here…” He chuckled at a new thought. “I know I did…”
Dash looked at him. “What’cha thinkin’ about?”
“Heh…” Jorge huffed. “I was just thinking what would happen if someone else I knew would’ve fallen through instead of Shadow.”
“Why’s that?”
“I dunno, like, Shadow was almost fine being stuck here.” Jorge shrugged. “But, had it been someone else, I could imagine a lot of screaming.”
“More screaming than Shadow chasing you down?” Dash giggled as she recalled that moment.
“Three times more screaming.” Jorge nodded. “Seriously, if it was someone like Ishtaba, crap would’ve hit the fan.”
“What kind of name is ‘Ishtaba’?” Dash tilted her head.
“The same kind of name as ‘Godson’ and ‘Shadow’.” Jorge replied. “They’re just nicknames we know each other by.”
“Ah.” Dash understood. “So Godson was still your name, just not your actual name. I get it.”
“Mhm.” Jorge hummed. “On the bright side, at least I’m not the only human in Equestria anymore.”
“Were you starting to get lonely?” Dash teased. “You could’ve just came to me…” She got closer to him. “I would’ve made sure you wouldn’t get lonely…”
“Dashie, we’re in public.” Jorge reminded her. “And second, I wasn’t getting lonely, per se. Just, rather, unrelatable. Seeing how there are so many differences between my world and yours.” He scratched the back of his neck. “I mean… you have Fluttershy to relate to, since you’re both pegasi. Me? I mean, I’ve told you a lot, but being told something isn’t the same as actually being a part of it… I’m probably doing a bad job at explaining this…” He sighed. “But, you get the point.”
Dash nodded. “Yeah. I get it.”
“Yeah…” He nodded back. “So, it’s nice to be able to relate with someone who knows most of the things I’m familiar with.”
“Even though you don’t have most of that stuff?”
“Yeah, but, they were still part of my life, they had some impact.”
Dash nodded in agreement, before quickly thinking of something. “What would’ve happened if anyone hadn’t fell through the portal?”
“Well, I probably would’ve just ignored it, try to relate with you guys. Adjust more into living in Equestria.”
“And what about Twilight’s transformation spell?” Dash cocked her head to the side.
“Well… while it probably is the one thing that would change me from ‘the only human in Equestria’ to just another ordinary citizen of Equestria… I like my hands.” Jorge explained. “I’ve had them my entire life. And I’ve been using them in ways you seem to enjoy.”
Dash cleared her throat. “Shut uuuuuup…”
“I’m not wrong, am I?” Jorge inquired.
Dash remained silent, not wanting to admit defeat. Though deep down, she knew he was right.
“Am I?”
“No…” She groaned.
“Exactly.”
“But I wouldn’t mind you being a stallion.” Dash countered. “Heck, if you ended up being a pegasus. We could go flying around together!” She beamed.
“I don’t know.” Jorge shook his head. “There’s still a lot for me to think about and that spell. It’s not even finished, so we can’t just start talking about it as if it’s gonna be finished any time soon.”
“I guess…” Dash agreed.
“Jorge!”
Dash’s ear twitched at the sudden voice, while Jorge merely just stopped in his tracks. They both turned their heads, finding Shadow running up to the couple.
“What’s going on?” Jorge asked.
“Twilight just sent a letter.” He panted, stopping his sentence there. He bent over, placing his hands on his knees, attempting to collect more oxygen.
“And?”
Shadow pointed a finger up, signaling him to wait. After a few deep breaths, he stood back up. “The letter came with both good news and bad news. Which do you want to hear first?”
“Tell us the good news, first.” Dash cut in.
“Figured you would…” Shadow muttered to himself, then quickly snapped back to normal. “Right, well. Good news is, Twilight closed the portal…”
“And the bad news?” Dash and Jorge asked in unison.
“Right before she could close it… something else came through, she didn't mention what though...”
Jorge and Dash looked at each other, almost worried at the thought of another human running around Equestria. And according from what he’s told her, the results won’t end up as calm as Shadow’s.
“And uh… She’s on her way right now.” Shadow added. “She’s on a train that’ll be here in a couple of hours…”
“Whelp. Time to play the waiting game.” Jorge randomly spoke, walking away with the shopping cart.
“Where the hell are you going?”
“To buy more bleach!”
“TOO MUCH INFORMATION, DAMMIT!”
“THAT’S WHAT YOU GET FOR ASKING DUMB QUESTIONS!”
Jorge, Dash, and Shadow arrived at the train station. They speculated on what could’ve possibly had fallen through the portal, though none of them could agree on exactly what was the most likely. With the odds of anything or anyone falling through increasing and decreasing as long as the portal was moving around, they literally had nothing to go on.
"Hey uh, Dash, this has been bugging me for a while…” Shadow spoke up. “Seeing as Twilight is a er... Princess... Shouldn't she have a castle…?"
“Y’know… I’m not entirely sure how that works…” Dash placed a hoof on her chin. “I mean, Celestia and Luna live in Canterlot… Cadence lives in the Crystal Kingdom… Those are all ‘high places’.”
“So what you’re saying is…” Shadow began. “Ponyville’s not ‘high’ enough for Twilight to get a castle in?”
“Yeah, pretty much…”
Suddenly, they could hear the loud “choo-choo” sounds of the train’s whistle as it got closer. Jorge simply pointed at it while calling it out.
As the train finally made its stop, the trio could hear the speakers turning on.
“We’ve reached our destination.”
The doors slowly open, though coincidentally, the door that was directly in front of the trio was the door that opened to reveal Twilight.
She stepped out of the train, and quickly pointed a wing behind her, as just the mere tip poked into the train. She pulled her wing back to her body, and smiled.
“So.” She spoke. “Did you guys get my letter?”
“Yeah.” Jorge answered. “According to it, you closed the portal?”
“Yep!” Twilight’s smile grew wider. “It actually wasn’t too hard. I guess it kinda softened up after having all that extra time to be open.”
“You weren’t gone very long, either.” Shadow noted. “Why did you come back by train?”
“Cause there was no way I was gonna carry what came out back home.” Twilight sighed.
“Speaking of which…” Dash cut in. “What the heck came through before the portal closed!? The suspense is killing me!”
Twilight turned her head back. “Okay, you can come out, now!”
Jorge and Shadow worriedly looked at each other, then looked back at the train.
“This isn’t gonna end well… is it?” Shadow asked, while he was worried of what exactly would come through that door. He was also decently calm about it.
Jorge, on the other hand, was having the completely opposite reaction.
He closed his eyes, looked up at the sky, and even went as far as putting his hands together, completing his praying stance. “Please don’t be Ish.” He chanted. “Please don’t be Ish. Please don’t be Ish. PLEASE DON’T BE—”
“AYY JORGE! THE FUCK AM I HEARING ABOUT NOT WANTING ME HERE!?”
Author's Note
Annnnnd that's the end of the three parter.
We now return to your regularly scheduled program.
...Or do we?

//-------------------------------------------------------//
       Chapter 2-4: Everything is fine...ish (Pt.1)        
//-------------------------------------------------------//
Chapter 2-4: Everything is fine...ish (Pt.1)
Ishtaba: Ayy so while Shadow’s gone doing who knows what.
Trey: Hm?
Ishtaba: I’ll probably play Dota when I get back. Quigz wanna come with?
Quigzerz: lol sure
Ishtaba: kk
*Godson is now Online.*
Ishtaba: WHAT
Godson: GUYS
Ishtaba: WHAT
Godson: I BARELY HAVE SIGNAL OUT HERE
Ishtaba: YOU’RE SUPPOSED TO BE DEAD
Godson: WELL I’M NOT, DEAL WITH IT.
Ishtaba: WHERE THE F*CK HAVE YOU BEEN
Godson: YOU WOULDN’T BELIEVE ME IF I TOLD YOU
Ishtaba: F*CK THE TRUTH
Godson: I DON’T HAVE MUCH TIME TO TALK.
Quigzerz: Damn i had 20$ on him being dead.
Trey: caps much?
*Godson is now Offline.*
*Godson is now Online.*
Godson: Guys seriously I don’t have much time to talk.
*Godson is now Offline.*
*Godson is now Online.*
Trey: gg Godson’s internet
Ishtaba: Alright fine what’s going on
Godson: If anyone feels anything weird near you, or if you have a dog barking at the air. DON’T INVESTIGATE IT.
Quigzerz: Fck you ima go investigate it, id wanna touch it, sounds like it would feel weird.
Trey: wtf?
Ishtaba: df you talking about
Godson: And if you DO decide to investigate… Then bring some sticky notes cause I want some.
Ishtaba: lol what
Godson: Yeah man, sticky notes aren’t easy to just come across where I am.
Ishtaba: Can’t you just buy some at the store?
Godson: None of the stores here have sticky notes. I don’t even think it exists here.
Quigzerz: I always carry sticky notes on me.
Trey: Where are you? Antarctica?
Godson: yeah sure whatever
Ishtaba: You’re telling me penguins don’t sell sticky notes?
Quigzerz: Bring me a penguin. plz.
Godson: That doesn’t matter. What matters is that you be very careful if you start investigating.
*Godson is now Offline.*
*Godson is now Online.*
Godson: And if you do fall through. Then… well...
Ishtaba: ?
*Godson is now Offline.*
Ishtaba: Wait, “well” what? GODSON WHO SAID YOU CAN F*CKING LEAVE
Quigzerz: lol fck, thats the last of that then.
Ishtaba: Screw it, I’m almost home, lemme just pull out my keys now so I don’t have to fiddle for them later.
Ish searched the front pocket of his backpack, trying to find his house keys. Sadly, they were hidden underneath all his random assortments of junk he keeps in his bag. Also within his bag lied a Pre-Calc textbook, a few packs of Post-Its, and other school supplies.
“God damnit, why the fuck do I keep so much useless shit in here?” He cursed as he stabbed his palm on a recently sharpened pencil. “Whatever, at least I did this shit now rather than at my door…”
As he pulled out his keys, Ish’s clumsiness got the better of him. He dropped them, but managed to see where they had fallen on the ground. However, for some reason, the lanyard they were on was half missing and the keys were slowly moving towards where the lanyard began to disappear.
“What the hell, am I going crazy?” Ish thought aloud as he went to pick up his keys. “Wait, the fuck? Why can't I pull this shit out?”
Ish starts moving closer, and tries to get a better grip on his lanyard; but, to his surprise, the lanyard disappeared from sight, and his keys soon followed suit. Almost as if they were sucked into the ground.
“Shit, I needed that. No one’s home, and I sure as hell am not sitting outside for a few hours...”
Of all the things Ishtaba could’ve done, he decided to literally poke the ground to search for where his keys went.
“God, I look like an idiot... Good thing all of my friends live on the opposite side of town…”
And at that moment, he noticed that his left hand felt absolutely nothing as he touched part of the ground. As if he was in contact with something ethereal. He tried to move his hand around to confirm his suspicions, but alas to no avail, he could not pull back his hand. In fact, his motions caused his arm to further fall into the ground.
“Shit, does no one see this?” He thought to himself. “Where’s other people when you need them…”
He attempted to move toward his partially sunken arm to try and free it, but, by some bizarre coincidence, his foot decided to get caught on the uneven part of the sidewalk.
“GOD DAMNIT!” He screamed as he tried to stop his fall forward with his other arm. “WAIT. SHIT. WOULDN’T THIS MEAN MY OTHER ARM IS GONNA GET STUCK NOW!?” He sighed in defeat. “Fuck it, shit happens. I give up. At least I can say I tried...” He apathetically declared as he fell to his imminent demise.
“SHIIIIIIIIIIT!” He screamed at the top of his lungs as he completely fell through. He closed his eyes as he prepared for his cruel fate.
Twilight walked into the area, royal guards grouped together to form a barrier between the public and the portal’s current position. While the portal was in the sky, she needed to focus her magic perfectly, which would require her to be on more familiar territory; the ground.
“Alright…” She muttered as her horn began illuminating in a bright purple glow. “This shouldn’t be too hard… If I was able to open and close the portal, then closing it alone should be relatively simple…” She gulped. “I hope…”
With that, a bright spark came from her horn, which slowly turned into a full on shot of lightning. It quickly made contact with its target, thus linking the portal to her complete magic signature, allowing control over it.
Now that she was linked with the portal, not only would she be able to close it, she would be able to feel if something fell through. She immediately focused her magic on closing the portal, though her attempted were interrupted, as a small object fell through. She groaned as the object lingered between the two worlds, almost as if something was preventing it to complete its journey.
Shortly after, the object finally fell through, and Twilight let out a sigh of relief. She canceled her spell momentarily in order to see what it was.
The object hit the sidewalk with a soft “clank”. Twilight walked up to the object, identifying it to simply be a lanyard, with some keys.
“Keys?” She thought aloud. “Why would keys fall through the portal?” She placed a hoof on her chin. “I get that anything could’ve fallen through the portal at any time… but keys?”
“SHIIIIIIIIIIT!”
Twilight jerked her head up, finding something large falling down directly above her. She took a few steps back, preventing the large being from landing on top of her. Her horn glowed in a purple light once more, creating a bright flash of light in front of her. When the light was gone, a mattress was in its place, allowing a safe crash.
With a soft “thump”, the being landed onto the soft mattress, breaking his entire fall.
“Well.” Twilight spoke. “I suppose that explains the lanyard...”
"Did you just say lanyard?" Asked the object as he lay on the mattress face down. "Cause I kinda need that to get home."
“Heh.” Twilight chuckled. “Well, you’re pretty far away from home…”
"What do you mean pretty far?" Ish asked as he rose from the mattress. He looked at his surroundings, seeing an average city, which he merely shrugged at. “Not even gonna bother asking how or why I’m miles away from where I should be,” Then he looked towards the sound of the voice, and found it’s source. "Oh... Fuck... Jorge wasn't lying after all... Well… guess I'm not playing Dota anytime soon." Ish lowered himself and positioned himself more comfortably on the mattress.
"Oh. You know Jorge." Twilight narrowed her eyes, ignoring the foreign ‘dota’ word. She then chuckled at how the aforementioned human would react to someone else he knew was stuck with him. "You're quite lucky to wind up here... Uh... What's your name?"
His eyes lit up, “Damn RIGHT, I know Horhey!” Ish was struggling to hold back his laughter,”Depends, what did Jorge say his name was when he got here?”
"Why does that matter?" Twilight tilted her head to the side.
“Because I want to know if he actually asked you all to call him ‘Godson’.” Smiled the human. “But that’s irrelevant right now. You may refer to me as simply “Ish”, I could care less on what you do end up calling me.” Smirked Ish as he stood up from sitting on the mattress. “Now, shall we go see Jorge? I want to surprise him.”
“Not yet.” Twilight shook her head. “Introductions aside, I have a job to do.” Her horn illuminated in a purple glow once more, wiping the mattress from existence.
“Who died and made you leader?” Ish retorted. “Also, who said I was done with that?” He pointed at the lack of a mattress behind him.
Twilight simply sighed, ignoring the whining human as she returned back to concentrating to close the portal.
Too bored to just sit around, Ish started to survey the area a second time. He noticed a wall of ponies that appeared to be some sort of royal entourage encircling him.
“Well, shit. I don’t think I can just ditch Twilight and find Jorge on my own…” He thought as he walked back to where his mattress would’ve been. He noticed that his keys were still on the ground. “How the hell didn’t I pick this up earlier?” Ish looked at the time on his phone, only two minutes passed since Twilight started to ignore him. “My God, I’m so fucking bored. She’s been standing there for ages...”
Meanwhile, Twilight’s horn kept its purple glow as she focused her magic once more. A spark appeared on her horn once again, until it turned into a full on shot of lightning, shooting up to the portal, which had moved just a little from its original position. She screwed her eyes shut and groaned softly as she linked herself to the portal again, requiring only one more step to finish her job.
“Hooray!” Ish said sarcastically, “NOW can we go see Jorge? Watching you pretend you’re part of stage crew was literally the most boring thing I’ve done all day.”
Twilight lifted an eye, focusing on the impatient human, losing just a bit of her concentration. She gasped at a sudden pain in her head, and returned back to focusing on the portal. Her groans growing louder, the electricity between her horn and the portal was still the same, until her horn produced a bigger shock, sending it straight at the portal.
“Now that I think about it, do you ponies even have stage crews?” Ish asked, completely ignorant of Twilight’s growing annoyance and frustration. “Screw it, you do now. Whatever, I’m gonna go ask nicely for those ponies in shining armor to politely move the hell out of my way. Peace OUT Twi!”
As Ish walked towards the guards, the guards he got the closest to simply shook their heads, and their horns began to glow.
“Oh… I’m just gonna go back to my invisible mattress now…” said a regretful Ishtaba. “Damn these guards are uptight… Maybe Twilight’s still pretending she’s DJing an EDM concert...”
The portal quickly became visible, shocking the guards, and the ignorant human. Twilight’s groans turned into screams of pain as she sent another blast at the portal, causing it to shrink significantly.
“Oh, she actually looks like she’s having trouble. Maybe I should tone my shit down a bit. Nah, FUCK that. That’s effort,” Ish thought as he completely disregarded the flashing lights in the sky. He checked the time again, it was almost 4:00 p.m. “Really? Only 2 minutes have passed again? Shit, I’m hungry. She better finish fast cause my needs get priority over whatever alien abduction is going on here.”
Meanwhile, the portal continued to shrink more and more, reaching to the point where only an acorn could fit.
"ARE YOU DONE YET!? YOU'RE LITERALLY SLOWER THAN MOLASSES!" screamed Ish as he rummaged through his bag for snacks.
Twilight gave a final shout, sending one more blast to speed up the process. Fortunately for her and the impatient human, it worked. The portal closed, disconnecting both Equestria and Ish’s home.
Panting after the ordeal, she toppled over, and began losing consciousness.
“Princess!” One guard called out, running out to grab her.
"Oh, I'm so sorry for being intolerable. No one's ever fainted from my sheer ego before," said Ish, apparently even his sympathies are self-centered.
The guard looked up at Ish, gawking over his focus on nobody but himself. He looked back down at the Princess, and began covering her in his own magic aura.
"Anyway, if you want to help her grab me an ice pa- Oh wait you have fucking magic."
The guard looked up at the irritating human. “She’s going into a magically induced coma, idiot.”
"Here's the play. Let's get—”
“Princess Twilight already prepared me for this situation.” The guard interrupted. “I just need to wake her with a simple spe—”
"ORRRR…” Ish interrupted. “You give her this so she doesn't feel like crap when she gets up," he said as he pulled out a pill from his bag. "This is a fever reducer and a pain-killer, I bet your magic can't do this."
The guard opened his mouth to say something, but then shook his head, ignoring the human’s stupidity. He poked Twilight’s head with his horn, shrinking whatever’s causing her unconsciousness.
Twilight gasped for breath as she awoke from her temporary coma. She panted for breath as she looked around, recalling the past few minutes.
“Whew…” She sighed. “I did it…”
“You did it?” Ish raised an eyebrow. “What about me? I helped too! Also, take this, you probably feel like shit after that fainting," he said as he handed her the pill.
Twilight looked at the pill in his hand, then back at him. Never changing her blank expression as she continued to listen to the annoyance she was forced to call a human.
"Do you ponies not have any concept on concentrated medication…?" Ish asked. "I swear it's like I'm being ignored or something... It's only been like 20 minutes since I got here, and I'm already sick of you people."
Twilight sighed, closed her eyes, and lifted the pill with her magic. She opened her eyes, looking at the human. “If it’s so helpful…” The pill flew into Ish’s open mouth. “Why don’t you take some?”
Ish swallowed, "Because I'm not the one who was just on the ground unconscious, or the one groaning in pain 10 minutes ago."
“Ordinary medicines don’t work on magically induced problems.” Twilight stated, getting back up on all fours. She cleared her throat with a soft “ahem”.
"Aaand, I already don't feel like arguing anymore. Do you know where I can find real food?"
Twilight looked at the guard, and nodded. “The portal’s closed, we’ll be heading out back to Ponyville. Thank you.”
The guard nodded, walking up to the other guards, who all broke apart from their circular barrier.
Twilight looked back to Ish. “You’ll get food when we reach the train.”
"And how long is that from now?" he asked impatiently.
“Not too long…” Twilight looked at a nearby train station. “In fact, I think there’s one leaving in a couple of minutes…”
Ish was already lined up to get a ticket before she even finished. "Yeah you see that purple pony over there? Just ask her to cover the bill. I'll take two tickets to Ponyville please."
Twilight rolled her eyes, walked past Ish, and continued off to board the train.
“You mean that purple pony?” The ticket master looked at the mare already boarding the train.
"Does it look like there's another purple pony around here. For Christ's sake, all the guards were white. You're blue, and every pony else is every color BUT purple. So yes, that purple pony is my payment option."
“I’m pretty sure she’s not paying for your ticket, sir…”
"Trust me, I swear she is. Why else would she come all the way here with her guards just to see me," Ish said very non-persuasively.
The ticket master looked at the train, seeing no signs of Ish’s payment option.
"I won't complain to your manager if you let me on," he offered desperately. "If anything you were horribly disrespectful to me and refused me service. Also you spit in my face."
Sighing, Twilight walked back out of the train. “Look… I’m sorry if this idiot has caused you any trouble…” Twilight apologized, flaring her wings open, signifying her princess status.
"Trouble my ass," Ish mumbled. "I was this close to closing negotiations..."
“Shut up.” Twilight growled, shifting her attention back to the ticket master. “I previously ordered my ticket, expecting to go home alone.” She looked back at the human with narrowed eyes. “He kinda just… showed up unexpectedly…” She focused on the stallion in front of her once more, placing some bits down on the desk. “This should be enough to cover his ticket…”
He nodded in response, giving her Ish’s ticket. “I apologize for the trouble you must be facing, Princess.”
"I heard that! And I am very much offended!" said Ish as he began to wander off towards the train.
“Heh…” She huffed. “You have no idea…” She shrugged, walking back to the train.
As the duo found their seats, and gave up their tickets, Ish was already eating some leftover waffles.
“What the hay is wrong with you!?” Twilight shouted at the human.
"Food was taking too long to get here," he replied as he took a bite out of his chocolate chip waffle. "I have an unopened bag of cookies if you want."
“Not the food.” Twilight shook her head. “You’re so self-absorbed! I-I’ve never met a human so ignorant, so stupid, so…”
“Handsome?” Ish finished. "Or is the word you’re looking for ‘godlike’?"
“No!” Twilight yelled in frustration. “Not even Shadow was this annoying! And he’s proven himself to be an even bigger idiot than Jorge at the moment!”
"You can't call me self-absorbed, I'm too perfect for that!" he argued. "Wait did you just say SHADOW!? I was under the assumption only Jorge was here."
“No, Shadow’s here, too.” Twilight shook her head once more. “He fell through the same portal you fell through.”
"Let's make a deal, I'll tone down my narcissism. And you give me an exact rundown of everything that's happened so far since Jorge got stuck here."
Twilight blinked. “Really?”
“Yeah. I want to know what’s happened before shit hits the fan.”
“How about I fill you in on everything that’s happened since Shadow arrived and leave you to figure out what’s happened to Jorge?”
“Deal.” he said. “Wow, I’m so good at negotiating…”
Author's Note
WERE YOU EXPECTING SOMEONE ELSE!?
And, uh, yeah. It's a two parter.

//-------------------------------------------------------//
       Chapter 2-5: Everything is fine...ish (Pt.2)        
//-------------------------------------------------------//
Chapter 2-5: Everything is fine...ish (Pt.2)
“How long does Shadow’s tattoo last, again?”
“For the next couple of days, unless he does something to redeem himself in less time.”
“Alright. So, I have an idea to surprise the—”
“No need. I already have something planned out.” Twilight smirked, turning her head to look out the window.
“Really?” Ish raised an eyebrow. “What is it?”
“Just follow my lead.” Twilight blatantly stated.
If it was one thing Ishtaba hated about anything, it was people— or in this case, ponies— being vague. It required him to try to think of what they were trying to imply or what details they were trying to omit. It required effort, one thing he wasn’t known for doing too well.
“Fine.” He laid back, crossing his arms. “How much farther are we?”
“Not much longer.” Twilight estimated. “We should be there in a matter of minutes, at this rate…”
“‘Aight. I’m fine with that.”
“We’ve reached our destination.”
“Alright. Don’t walk out until I call you.” Twilight commanded.
“But if you call my name, you’ll ruin the surprise!”
“I’m not gonna call your name!”
“Oh, right. That makes sense,” Ish sighed a breath of relief.
As the doors slowly opened, Twilight quickly turned her head back.
“Quick, move out of the way, so they don’t see you.”
The doors in front of her began to reveal the three friends that she was focused on surprising. Rainbow Dash was more of an extra, as she was aiming more at surprising and or shocking the two humans.
She stepped out of the train, and quickly pointed a wing behind her, as just the mere tip poked into the train. She pulled her wing back to her body, and smiled.
“So.” She spoke. “Did you guys get my letter?”
“Yeah.” Jorge answered. “According to it, you closed the portal?”
“Yep!” Twilight’s smile grew wider. “It actually wasn’t too hard. I guess it kinda softened up after having all that extra time to be open.”
“You weren’t gone very long, either.” Shadow noted. “Why did you come back by train?”
“Cause there was no way I was gonna carry what came out back home.” Twilight sighed.
“Speaking of which…” Dash cut in. “What the heck came through before the portal closed!? The suspense is killing me!”
Twilight turned her head back. “Okay, you can come out, now!”
Jorge and Shadow worriedly looked at each other, then looked back at the train.
“This isn’t gonna end well… is it?” Shadow asked, while he was worried of what exactly would come through that door. He was also decently calm about it.
Jorge, on the other hand, was having the completely opposite reaction.
He closed his eyes, looked up at the sky, and even went as far as putting his hands together, completing his praying stance. “Please don’t be Ish.” He chanted. “Please don’t be Ish. Please don’t be Ish. PLEASE DON’T BE—”
Ish took a step out of the train, hearing all of Jorge’s chanting. “AYY JORGE! THE FUCK AM I HEARING ABOUT NOT WANTING ME HERE!?”
“Fuck... It just had to be him...” Shadow silently said under his breath.
Jorge looked up, seeing the angry asian stare down at him. His eyes widened, and his whole body started to shiver. Shadow looked to his side, seeing the shivering human. The fact he was reacting this way to Ish’s arrival, and not his own proved well enough how much he didn’t want him here.
Dash went wide-eyed as well, not because of Ish’s arrival, but more over Jorge’s reaction to his arrival. She’d never seen him look so scared in the one year she’d known him. She looked up at the asian, wondering just what has this human done to worry her boyfriend?
“SHIT!” Jorge cursed aloud. “IT JUST HAD TO BE YOU.” He pounded the floor under him. “OUT OF EVERYONE IT COULD’VE POSSIBLY BEEN… MY HORRIBLE LUCK BROUGHT THE ONE ASSHOLE I WAS HOPING NOT TO SEE HERE!”
Shadow took a step back, having never heard Jorge swear like he had now. He knew Jorge would overreact whenever he was angry, but he’d never had seen this.
“I think I’ll.. just go wait at Twilight’s place..” He said quickly as he walked away.
“WOW.” Ish shouted. “I’m offended,” He huffed. “I WENT THROUGH SO MUCH SHIT TO BRING THE STUFF YOU ASKED FOR, AND THIS IS WHAT I GET IN RETURN?”
“I WAS HOPING IT’D BE ANYONE ELSE BUT YOU!”
“...Nevermind, this looks like it’s gonna get interesting…” Shadow turned around, watching from a distance as the two humans battled it out.
“I GUESS YOU’RE NOT GETTING THE POTATO CHIPS I SAVED IN MY BACKPACK FOR YOU!”
“POTATO CHIPS?” Jorge raised an eyebrow. “...What flavor?”
In an instant, Shadow facepalmed. Unhappy with how the battle abruptly ended.
“Oh. It’s… uh… ‘fuck you’ flavored.” Ish retorted, digging through his backpack, and casually started eating the potato chips.
The two bickering humans heard a snicker, they turned their heads towards the source, finding it to be Shadow.
“AYY SHADOW!” Ish shouted, stretching his arms out in a hugging gesture. “WHEN THE FUCK DID YOU GET HERE?” He quickly interrupted himself. “Oh. Wait. Twilight told me… Nevermind.”
“Sup, faggot?” Shadow waved.
“Rude.” Ishtaba huffed.
“So, how’s being stuck in Equestria with us feel like?” Shadow asked curiously.
“Being stu—what.’
“Twilight didn’t tell you?” Shadow chuckled softly. “There’s no way back.”
“Shit…” Ishtaba groaned, looking down at his bag of chips. “I probably shouldn’t waste these, then…”
Jorge perked up. “Can I hav—”
“No. Fuck you.”
“So I’m stuck here in a world full of fucking ponies, and we’re the only three humans here!?”
“Sounds about right.” Jorge nodded.
“Where the hell are we going, anyway?”
“Golden Oak Library.” Shadow bluntly replied.
Ish turned his head to the prismatic mare walking strangely close to a certain human.
“AYY JORGE!”
Jorge turned his head to see the suddenly curious asian. “What is it now, Ish...?”
“HAVE YOU FUCKED HER YET?”
Shadow nearly busted into laughter at Ish’s question. If he was eating or drinking something, he’d likely have choked on it from trying to hold back the insane amount of laughter that would’ve spouted.
Twilight simply snickered, more effectively preventing her own laughter by covering her mouth with a hoof.
Jorge and Dash, however, reacted differently. Jorge simply went wide-eyed, softly clearing his throat, and avoiding to answer his question. Whereas, Dash just looked at him, her face completely flushed as she stared blankly at him. After a short time, she felt a hand softly pat her head, she looked up, seeing her human look at her. She shook it off, and decided to just ignore the asian.
“So you have!” Ish pointed a finger at them.
“Ish. It’s none of your business.” Shadow sighed. “Irritate Jorge all you want, but can you not make fun of his sex life?”
Jorge looked at his friend. “Thanks, Shadow…”
“If he has one...” Shadow snickered.
“Remember when I said ‘thanks’?” Jorge asked. “I take that back.”
“Hey, I’m doing you a favor, mate. I neither confirmed or denied you doing anything with Dash.”
“I might’ve prefered if you did…” Jorge muttered, only to get nudged by the mare at his side.
“Anyway.” Twilight cut in, finally reaching their destination. “Shadow, you got all those chores done, right?”
“Those and some.” Shadow vaguely replied.
Twilight simply nodded back, opening the door to the library.
“Now I see why it’s called the ‘Golden Oak Library’...” Ish thought aloud. “It’s a library… inside of a fucking tree!”
Twilight rolled her eyes at Ish’s stunning thought. Walking into her home, she noticed her spellbook was lying around on the book podium.
“Uh… Shadow?”
“Yeah…?”
“Why is my spellbook lying around?”
"Um… Because I put it there?”
“You touched my spellbook?” Twilight raised an eyebrow, her tone lowering as she stared at the Canadian.
"Um... Yeah..." Shadow slowly nodded.
“‘Kay, if you need me, I’ll be sitting on this couch.” Jorge bluntly stated. “If only I had popcorn, though…”
“But it’s just a BOOK.” Ish tilted his head. “What’s so bad about Shadow touching Twilight’s book, now?”
Dash climbed up on the couch, cuddling with her human. “Twilight doesn’t let anypony touch her spellbook. And by ‘anypony’, I mean anypony. Not even Spike.”
“And who the fuck is Spike?”
"I am." said the young dragon from afar, further confusing the confused asian.
“Baby Barney?” Ish dumbly thought aloud. He shook his head, returning back to the current issue. “But, it’s just a book… why is it such a bad thing?”
“Why did you touch my book, Shadow!?”
“To read it?”
Jorge cleared his throat, grabbing Ish’s attention once more. “Not entirely sure. All I know is that when I tried to touch it, Twilight nearly zapped my hand off.” He shrugged. “I think she said something abou—”
“I don’t let anypony touch my book, Shadow!”
“Why the hell not?”
“Any little mistake could ruin my spells!” Twilight explained. “I may remember most of my spells, but there are a lot of complex things in there that can easily be ruined!”
“Yeah. That.” Jorge added.
Suddenly, Twilight had a thought. “Please tell me you didn’t screw it up…” She ran off to the book, and began flipping through the pages as she searched for something. Then she came across the bookmarked page.
“Wait, I’m still confused. What did Shadow screw up, now?” Ish curiously asked.
“Don’t tell me you screwed up what I think you screwed up, Shadow…” Jorge sighed.
Shadow raised an eyebrow at the two humans, as their accusations were nowhere near what really happened.
“SHADOW!” Twilight shouted. “WHAT DID YOU DO TO MY TRANSFORMATION SPELL!? YOU’VE RUIN—Wait...Huh?”
Shadow walked up to the book, smirking as he got a good look at his completed work.
“You…” Twilight softly spoke. “You finished it…?”
Hearing that made Dash gawk in awe. She looked at Jorge, who looked back at her with wide eyes.
Meanwhile, Ish was still left out of the loop. “God damnit,” He groaned. “How am I supposed to make fun of him if he didn’t screw up!?”
Twilight looked up at the proud human. "H-How…?”
“It was kinda easy, really.” Shadow shrugged. “It had me a little stumped, I’ll admit, but once I got past it, I was able to crack the entire thing.”
Twilight looked at the page again in disbelief. Analysing all the equations, variables, and answers. They all lined up with what she needed them to do.
Her horn visibly sparked. “Wow. Guess you’re not as much as an idiot as I thought.”
Shadow quickly took a look at his arm, feeling a soft tingle. Finding the tattoo to be long gone.
“My God... it’s finally gone... Thanks Twi.” Shadow said quickly pulling the mare into a quick hug.
“WHAT!?” Ish shouted. “SHIT. I FORGOT TO MAKE FUN OF SHADOW’S TATTOO.” He quickly looked at Jorge. “WELL. AT LEAST JORGE STILL HAS HI—”
“Nope. Mine faded away a good ten minutes ago.”
“FUCK!” Ishtaba stomped on the ground.
Twilight was caught off guard by the human’s sudden embrace. “Y-You’re welcome!” She replied.
"Think he'll ask now?" Dash whispered into Jorge's ear.
“Nah.” Jorge whispered back. “He may have softened her up a bit, but I still don’t think Twilight would say yes if he asked now.”
Twilight slowly pulled away from the hug. “Just… Don’t touch my book again. Got it?”
"Sure... I can do that."
“Looks like he’s gonna win the bet, though.” Dash continued whispering. “If he keeps softening her up like this, she’ll definitely go on a date with him.”
“You want him to win, don’t you?” Jorge whispered with a growl.
“Yes and no.” Dash answered. “I don’t want you eating your shoe. But I wouldn’t mind if Twilight and Shadow got together.”
“Why do you want them to get together, anyway?”
“Well. Shadow just proved himself to be at least as smart as Twilight.”
“He figured out some equations, but I don’t think he’s smart enough to rival Twilight.”
“Kay, whatever. He’s not a total idiot like you are.” Dash countered. “Besides, I’ve seen the looks he’s given her. He has something on her. He just needed a little push.”
“One. I’m not an idiot.” Jorge retorted. “I may act like one sometimes, but I’m not.” He explained. “And two… If that’s the case, then your little plan will actually work.”
“Then you better start buying that mouthwash.” Dash chortled.
Jorge softly groaned, knowing he would lose the bet his marefriend forced him in. “Then I might as well start enjoying the little time I have to kiss you before I have to start using mouthwash for who knows how long…”
“Wha—” Dash suddenly found herself unable to speak, as her human softly pressed his lips against hers. Letting him continue their kiss, she threw her forelegs around his neck, making sure he wouldn’t pull back and leave her wanting more.
Meanwhile, as their kiss got deeper and more passionate, everyone else simply stared at the couple.
“Are they making out… on my couch?” Twilight gawked.
“Looks like it…” replied Shadow.
Ish watched as the couple made out. At first he wondered how neither of them weren’t uncomfortable kissing different species. But then his train of thought was immediately interrupted by a shocking revelation. “Shadow are you gonna pick that phone up?”
“What?”
“CAUSE I FUCKING CALLED IT! JORGE FUCKED HER AFTER ALL!”
"ISH SHUDDAP!" yelled Shadow, "DON'T DISTRACT THE LOVE BIRDS!"
“BUT WHAT IF THEY START FUCK—”
"I SAID SHUT UP!"
Author's Note
Annnnnd that's the end of the two parter.
We now return to your regularly scheduled program.

//-------------------------------------------------------//
               Chapter 2-6: "I'M BATMANNNN!"               
//-------------------------------------------------------//
Chapter 2-6: "I'M BATMANNNN!"
“So… It’s been one week since Shadow and Ish arrived. What do you think of them?”
“Shadow’s a pretty cool dude… At least he knows when to screw around and when not to. Unlike Ish…”
“How so?”
“He’s… something else, to say the least.”
Jorge chuckled. “And then you wonder why I overreacted so much back at the train station last week.”
“Geez…” Dash sighed. “Don’t get me wrong, he’s probably a good friend deep down all that irritating mess. But he needs to learn to keep to his own business!” She rolled her eyes. “Before it used to be just seeing us make out, but now it’s like… every time he sees us even at least cuddle, he shouts ‘so you did…erm, that word...after all’. And after a while, it’s really annoying.”
Jorge cupped her cheeks with his hands. “Well… At least he can’t bother us while we’re at home…”
“Mhm…” Dash hummed softly, feeling the soft sensations of her lover’s lips as they resumed their kiss.
The two of them had spent the day together lying around in bed. Randomly switching from making out to just casual pillow talk. Linda had also evacuated the room, avoiding any random hoof or foot sliding around and hitting her.
Dash took this moment to her advantage. As they made out, she climbed on top of her boyfriend, pinning him down, putting him under her complete control. She pulled away from the kiss, smirking at the thought of now having him wrapped around her hoof.
Unfortunately for her, their heated moment was interrupted by a series of knocking on the front door.
“Ugh.” Dash rolled her eyes. “So much for spending the day in bed…”
Jorge chuckled at the mare’s failed attempts. He gave her a quick peck on the lips. “One day, maybe… But I guess today’s not that day.”
He slowly rose out of bed, put on his slippers, and walked out of the room.
“Put some pants on!”
Jorge looked down, realizing he was wearing only his underwear. “Oh. Right…”
Jorge opened the door, finding Shadow waiting behind it.
“Heya, Shadow.” He spoke. “What brings you here all of a sudden?”
“Twilight wanted me to tell you two that she was going to the Crystal Kingdom, to see if you two wanted to go with her.” Shadow explained.
“Ooh, the Crystal Kingdom… I’ve always wanted to see that in per—wait… Why is she going?”
“Something about a Duke and Duchess of Maretonia?” Shadow scoffed. “Sounds like a dumb place, but, Twilight has to be there.”
“Maretonia… Maretonia… why does that sound familiar…?”
“...Jorge?”
“Eh?”
“Why aren’t you wearing a shirt?”
Jorge looked down at his clothes, seeing the lack of a shirt on him. “Oh. That. Uh, I was in a rush to grab clothes and open the door.” He explained. “Last night got a little…” He covered his mouth as he cleared his throat. “Uh… heated.”
“Riiiiight.” Shadow nodded. “Well. Are you coming or not? Everyone else is.”
“Everyone?” Jorge raised an eyebrow. “Rarity, AJ, Flutters, everyone?”
“Yeah. Pretty much.”
Suddenly, a thought passed through Jorge’s head. “Wait. Did you say the Duke and Duchess of Maretonia?”
“Yeah…”
“In the Crystal Kingdom?”
“Yeah…”
“Are Celestia and Luna going to be there?”
“Yeah… Wait, how did you know that? I didn’t mention that part…”
Jorge went wide-eyed as he finally put all the pieces of the puzzle together. “Oh no…”
“What? What’s going o—” Jorge interrupted the confused Canadian, pulling him into the house. “Hey!”
“It’s happening.” Jorge stated. “I can’t believe I forgot this would happen.”
“What? What’s happening?” Shadow raised an eyebrow.
“Stay there.” Jorge commanded, and ran off to the bedroom, surprising the mare waiting in the bed.
“Hey, Dashie. Uh… Twilight wanted to know if you wanted to go with her to the Crystal Kingdom.”
“Huh?”
“She has some royal stuff to do, and she wanted to know if you could go with her.”
Dash sat up. “Oh. Yeah, yeah. I can go.” She nodded. “I’ll stop by at her place right now.”
“Alright. Tell her I said ‘hi’ for me.” Jorge said quickly, giving her a quick peck.
“Woah, woah, woah…” Dash grabbed his arm. “You’re not going?”
“Sorry, Dashie.” Jorge shook his head. “I have some stuff to do.”
“Oh…” Dash’s ears flopped back. “Alright.”
“Next time Twilight has to go somewhere, though. I promise I’ll go.” Jorge reassured her. “But today, I just remembered I have some stuff to do.”
Dash raised an eyebrow. “What kind of stuff?”
“Important stuff.” Jorge bluntly stated. “I wish I could tell you, but I kinda can’t. You just gotta trust me on this one.”
“Fine…” Dash huffed. “I’m trusting you on this, Jorge.”
“Thanks, Dashie.” Jorge gave her another quick peck. “I gotta go.”
He sped out of the room, stopping as he came into Shadow once more.
“Jorge, what the hell are you freaking out about?” Shadow asked. “Are you gonna explain to me what’s going on, already?”
“Tirek.” Jorge huffed, stopping to catch a breath.
“Huh?” Shadow tilted his head. “What’s a ‘Tirek’?”
“Not a what… a who…” Jorge sighed, slowly catching all the breath he needed “He’s coming.”
“Okay?”
“No. You don’t get it. Tirek steals magic. Twilight is going to the Crystal Kingdom to simply stand and wave, and then she’ll question herself as Princess.” Jorge began. “A bunch of crap will happen. And I need your help to make sure everything happens the way they should.”
“I-I don’t get it, what kind of crap will happen?”
Jorge covered his mouth with a hand, shushing him, then quickly pulled back as he watched his marefriend walk towards the door.
“So yeah, Shadow. I just remembered I had to do a lot of important stuff, that way we can—”
The door shut behind her.
Jorge sighed a breath of relief. “Discord will betray the ponies, and help Tirek in his quest to suck all the magic out of everypony in Equestria.” Jorge explained. “Once he gets strong enough, he’ll go after the Princesses. But. By then, they’ll have transferred all of their magic to Twilight. She’ll lose control a bit, and then there’ll be a huge battle between the two.”
“And what do we do?”
“For one, when Twilight leaves, you’ll have to steal her spellbook.”
“What!?” Shadow shouted. “Do you not remember all the massive yelling from last week!? I’m not gonna go through that again!”
“It’ll help you win the bet, Shadow.” Jorge sighed. “The Golden Oak Library gets destroyed, as well as everything else in it.”
“W-woah, wait. What?” Shadow jerked his head back. “Really?”
“Yeah.” Jorge nodded. “I don’t help people win bets against myself, obviously, but I’m doing you a favor.”
“Why?”
“Ish owes me a favor.” Jorge snickered. “I can just make him eat his shoe.”
“Ooooh. Alright. So, steal the book, and then what?”
“We stay out of Twilight’s way when she gets all that extra magic.”
“What happens if we don’t?”
“We could change events, and personally, I’d rather not live in a world ruled by Tirek.”
“How would you know that the events would lead up to that?”
“There are a large series of events that have to happen.” Jorge shrugged. “Otherwise, they won’t be able to send Tirek back to tartarus.”
“Oh…” Shadow nodded. “What about Ish?”
“We may need to fill him in, too. But other than staying out of Twilight’s way, we need to make sure those series of events actually happen.”
“Alright, how exactly are we gonna do this?”
Jorge looked out the window, seeing Twilight and her friends walking off to the train station.
“I have an idea…”
A day later, Jorge, Shadow, and Ish hid behind a bush. Watching as their friends made their way over to the Castle of the Two Sisters.
“Why are we hiding behind a bush again?” Ish asked.
“We don’t want to get in the middle of the events.” Jorge sighed. “One little screw up, and we could change the outcome of the entire thing, for better or for worse.”
“And how do you know we don’t change the events for the better?” Ish looked at the worried man next to him.
“Do you want to take that chance?” Jorge raised an eyebrow. “You’re asking to risk to change the events, and have a fifty-fifty chance of either having Tirek take over Equestria, or make it easier to beat Tirek.”
“And I personally don’t want to take that chance and live in a world ruled by Tirek.“ Shadow added.
“All I heard was ‘make it easier to beat Tirek’.” Ish shrugged. “Do you even know what he looks like?”
“Jorge does.” Shadow nudged his head to the aforementioned human.
“Picture a centaur, black horse body, red humanoid body, and an ugly as heck beard.”
“That doesn’t help… at all.” Ish droned
Shadow sighed. “Think satan as a centaur.”
“OHHHHHHH. Okay. That makes sense.” Ish nodded. “‘Aight, damn. So if everything plays out the way they do in the show, then that guarantees he’ll lose?”
“Yeah. Exactly.” Shadow confirmed.
Jorge muttered something unintelligible, the only thing the other two humans could understand was something about “Discord”.
“I heard my name?”
“Who the fuck said you could speak?” Ish turned around quickly, surprised over the new voice. Upon seeing the draconequus, he took a few steps back, and tripped on the bush behind him.
Shadow chuckled at the Asian’s sudden reactions, then turned around to see who was the one that scared the crap out of him. Only for him to jerk his head back at the sight. “Woah. Okay…”
“Eh?” Jorge turned his head back. “Of course you’d show up at the very mention of your name.”
“Godson! My good man!” Discord beamed. “It’s been quite a while since our last encounter!”
“What are you doing here?”
“Why, I was about to ask you the same thing!” Discord crossed his arms. “Are you spying on your marefriend, hmm?” Suddenly, a bright flash of light came from his claw, once it faded away, there were a pair of binoculars in its place. “Y’know, if you wanted to spy on her, you could’ve just asked for my help…”
“I’m not spying on my marefriend, per say...” Jorge shook his head. “More like… carefully watching from a distance…”
“So. Spying.”
“Yeah, whatever, shut up.” Jorge huffed, crossing his arms.
Discord saw the human next to him. “Hellooooo~!” He cheered. “I thought I felt two magical disturbances a week ago! Were you one of them, by any chance?”
“I’m sure as hell magical, but i ain’t no disturbance, unlike your ass.” Shadow spat.
“Oooh. Quite the rude one, you are...” Discord mentally noted, yet spoke aloud so everyone else could hear. “It’s a pleasure to make your acquaintance, my name is Discord.” He reached out his paw. “And you are…?”
“Your worst nightmare.” Shadow shook his paw.
“No. You’re not my worst nightmare.” Discord shook his head. “Believe me, you don’t want to know what it is.”
Shadow glared at Jorge, who seemed to be taking a step back.
“Anyway!” Discord pulled his paw back. “I was on my way to catch up with the girls, and here I find you two.”
“DISTURBANCE MY ASS!” Ish stood up. “I’LL HAVE YOU KNOW THAT I’M A FUCKING ANGEL”
Discord kept a blank stare at the shouting man. “...And that one is quite the character…” He noted. “So, how did you two even get here?”
“Long story short, there was a bit of magic residue, or something, and a portal opened on it’s own. And they fell through by accident.” Jorge explained.
“I see…” Discord placed a thinking paw on his chin. “It’s quite a shame that there’s no way back for you three, but, you seem to be handling yourselves pretty fine.” He nodded. “In any case, I suppose I must take my leave.” He tossed the binoculars over to the familiar human. “Ta-ta!”
Jorge covered his eyes, while the other two simply stared as Discord vanished in a bright flash of light.
“That voice sounded so familiar…” Shadow pointed out. “I can’t put my finger on it, though…”
“Don’t think too hard on it.” Jorge shrugged. “You’ll give yourself a headache.” He slowly began walking back home. “Our work here is done, for now.”
“That’s it? We just came here to make sure they walked into that old abandoned pile of shit?” Ish pointed at the castle behind him.
“That. And to make sure Discord appeared to talk to them.”
“And now that it happened, what now?” Shadow asked, following suit.
“We just play the waiting game until Tirek shows.” Jorge looked at the Canadian. “Did you get Twilight’s spellbook?”
“Yeah.”
“Good…”
”I’ll bet he takes his sweet time.”
”Or maybe perhaps these things just take time.”
”You’re back! Did you bring the cucumber sandwiches?”
”I did. I imagine they’ll be your last decent meal for quite some time.”
Jorge, Shadow and Ish simply watched as Discord trapped their friends, minus Twilight. Jorge simply sighed, knowing he had to let his marefriend deal with what was to come.
“Is this supposed to happen?” Shadow worriedly asked. “I feel bad watching this…”
“Then don’t watch…” Jorge shut his eyes. “Unfortunately, this is what happens. And all of their magic gets drained.”
“And we didn’t try to stop this earlier because?” Ish asked, preparing to jump out from their hiding spot, only to get pulled back by Shadow. He looked at the angry canadian, seeing his irritated glare.
“This needs to happen, Ish.” Shadow sighed. “Relax.”
“But I’m bored…!”
“If we step in now, we could fuck everything up. Relax Ish”
Ish groaned. “Fine… As long as I get to do something later…”
”But you said this was a sign of your gratitude and loyalty. A gift from someone close to you.”
”My brother, who betrayed me. It’s just as worthless as he is.”
“C’mon. We gotta move.” Jorge stated. “The next event should be coming along pretty soon.”
“Remind me again why we’re hiding and watching?”
“Just to make sure everything happens the way they should. If not, we step in and try to make it play out as close as it was originally supposed to.”
“Alright… Lead the way, then.”
As Jorge, Shadow, and Ish hide in yet another bush, they watched Tirek walked around, every step sounding a meteor crashing into the ground, as he hunted for the fourth princess he heard about.
“We’re early.”
“We’re early?” Shadow repeated. “The hell do you mean we’re early?”
“I don’t have a time frame of when everything happens, Shadow. I’ve been spending the past couple of days stalking my friends just to see if they played the events how they're supposed to turn out. Cut me some slack.”
“So... We need to buy time then…?” Shadow replied quickly.
“It’s starting to look like it.” Jorge nodded.
“Well, I can’t do it. I have her book in my possession.” Shadow shook his head.
Jorge crossed his arms. “I’m not gonna do it. I’d rather not die from Tirek’s rampage, thank you very much.”
“Then what ab—”
”HEY YOU! YEAH YOU! OVER HERE”
Jorge and Shadow immediately turned their heads to where Ish was originally sitting with them, and then looked toward the sound of the shouting voice.
Ish grabbed a rock, and proceeded to throw it at the large beast. “WHO THE FUCK SAID YOU CAN IGNORE ME?!”
“Welp. Guess we know who’s doing it…” Jorge muttered, while Shadow simply facepalmed next to him.
With a soft “bonk”, the rock his Tirek’s head. He stopped in his tracks, and looked down at the raging Asian.
“WHO ARE YOU?” Tirek asked in a loud, booming voice. “...WHAT ARE YOU?”
"I'M BATMANNNN!"
“Welp. Rest in piece, Ish.” Jorge rolled his eyes, whilst Shadow was struggling to not burst into uncontrollable laughter.
Tirek simply raised an eyebrow. Debating on what to do with the shouting being.
“I’M GONNA REKT YOU SO HARD, YOU’LL BE REKT IN ALL FOUR ANGLES. IT’LL BE A PERFECT REKTANGLE!”
Jorge and Shadow covered their mouths as they tried to sustain their laughter. They could see each other bouncing as they kept inhaling and exhaling sharply in silent laughter.
“AND THEN WHEN YOU’RE REKT AND GONE. I’LL BE CHOWIN’ DOWN ON 40 KEKS— I MEAN CAKES!” Ish continued randomly shouting. “I’LL MEME YOU SO HARD YOU WON’T BE ABLE TO EVEN BEAT A DEAD HORSE” Suddenly, a thought came to mind. “DID YOU KNOW THAT I ONCE SENT TEN PUNS TO A NEWSPAPER CONTEST? DESPITE MY BEST EFFORTS, NO PUN IN TEN DID! GOD I’M FUCKING HILARIOUS,"
“Should we stop him?” Jorge asked.
“Nah.” Shadow shook his head. “This is hilarious!”
Jorge looked up at Tirek, who had a large ball of energy floating between his giant horns.
“HEY, DID IT HURT?” Ishtaba grabbed another rock.
”DID WHAT HURT?” Tirek raised an eyebrow.
“WHEN I FELL FROM HEAVEN AND KICKED YOUR SORRY ASS!”
"Jorge... I think Ish is about to become fried noodles... We should do something..." Shadow whispered but as he looked over Jorge wasn't beside him anymore. Wide-eyed, he looked in front of him, seeing Jorge speeding towards Ish.
"THAT BALLS THE SIZE OF YOUR MOTHE—”
Before Ish could even finish his sentence, Jorge had jumped straight ahead, using the little strength he could use in the air to push him out of the way. Unfortunately, though, he risked himself in the process.
As Ish was pushed out of the way, the large ball of magic landed where Ish was previously standing, luckily for Jorge, it didn’t hit him. However, it still sent him flying off several feet into the air, as it landed close to him.
"God damnit Jorge... Dash is gonna kill you if you're not already dead..." Shadow quietly said under his breath, "Wonder if I could actually use any of these spells..." As he looked down at the spellbook in his arms.
Jorge landed chest-first on the ground with a loud “thud”, as well as a soft “crack”. He groaned softly as he attempted to get up, but sadly had no avail in doing so. His right leg was cracked in certain places, as was his left arm hairline fractured, and a few ribs cracked. There were also some minor burns across his chest and face.
“JORGE!” Ish shouted, getting back up. “GOD DAMNIT. WHO TOLD YOU TO INTERFERE WITH MY STALLING!?” He looked at where he previously stood, finding no sign of his Cuban friend. He quickly looked around, searching for him, so he could yell at him directly.
Upon seeing him about a couple of feet away, he ran off to him. Preparing to give him the shouting of a lifetime.
Tirek, meanwhile, figured his work was done. As he saw a certain purple alicorn randomly teleporting around.
“PRINCESS TWILIGHT!”
Twilight gasped. “Tirek!”
“YOU HAVE SOMETHING THAT BELONGS TO ME!”
Meanwhile, Ish had caught up with the injured human. Unaware of his injuries, he took a deep breath. “MOTHERFUCKER. I WAS THIS CLO—Oh… Oh shitttttt…” He had gotten a better look, seeing large bumps in his leg and arm. As well as the burns across his upper body.
Shadow came by, and gasped at the injured cuban. "Jorge... This is going to hurt like a bitch but you need to move and this bone needs to be reset.” He looked at the asian. “Ish hold him still."
Ish looked behind him, watching as Twilight and Tirek looked like they were doing what appeared to be the equivalent of “Dragon Ball Z”’s Kamehameha.
“Uh, guys… Shouldn’t we run? Goku and Vegeta are about to fight each other. No wait, I wanna watch.”
"Okay. Jorge, on the count of three I'll reset it. One." Shadow replied quickly as he then reset the bone.
“OWWWW. FUCK.” Jorge cursed aloud. "WHAT THE HELL HAPPENED TO TWO AND THREE?"
"Two. Three." Shadow smiled sheepishly. He looked at the amazed Asian, and patted him to grab his attention. “Ish, you faggot. Help me get him out of here.”
Ish turned around. “But, Twilight’s about to go Super Saiyan…”
“Woahhhhh…” Ish muttered, looking out the window. “Shadow, do you see this shit? They’re blasting the shit out of Tirek with a giant fucking rainbow. A GIANT FUCKING RAINBOW!”
"Good..." Muttered Jorge breathlessly in pain, "That means everything stayed true to the events... Mostly..."
“Ish. Do you have any pain killers in that fucking backpack of yours?” Shadow asked.
“Hell yeah I do. Why do yo—”
"Just that one kind?"
“Yeah.” Ish nodded.
"Okay, well... They'll have to do. Hand em over."
Ish removed his backpack from his back, and proceeded to dig through it. Once he found what he was looking for, he gave the bottle to him.
“Well, these aren't hospital grade so. Jorge take four." Shadow said as he hands the four pills to him. “And Ish. Go get him some water.”
“Why do I—”
“Just do it, you fucking faggot.”
“Fine…” Ish groaned, quickly exiting the room.
“Twilight better hurry up and restore everyone’s magic…” Jorge breathlessly pleaded. “All the doctors and nurses in here can barely do anything since they’ve been drained…”
"Jorge, unless these are healed with magic. No being rough with Dash for a while." stated Shadow, "I mean, my casts only go so far."
“I’m not even sure if there’s healing magic…” Jorge replied. “I remember back in Season two, Dash’s wing was in a cas—”
Ish came back through the door. “‘Kay, I got the water.” He handed it over to Shadow, and then looked back out the window.
"Okay, here is your water, take the painkillers and you should be good for a while. But no walking on your own."
“Kay, so everypony flew away. No idea why or where they’re going, but who cares.”
“They’re returning the magic to everypony in the world.” Jorge answered, taking the first pill. “Geez, these pills are big…”
“If they’re returning everyone’s magic… Then wouldn’t that mean the doctor will be here any minute?” Ish asked.
“Probably.” Shadow nodded, watching as Jorge engulfed the second pill. “It might take them some time, though. Seeing how they have other patients to take care of.”
“Don’t you think they’d put an injured alien on the highest priority?” Ish thought aloud. “I mean, wouldn’t that make sense? Cause they’d definitely put me on priority if I were injured, right?”
Shadow shrugged as Jorge took the third pill. “Dunno. But, tell you what, Ish.” He sat up from his chair. “Hold this book for me. And I need you to keep an eye on Jorge. That amount of pills are gonna knock him out, and he needs someone with him for when the doctor or doctors arrive.”
“Where are you going?” Ish turned around.
Jorge took down the final pill, and weakly chuckled at Ish’s question. “Look out the window again, Ish…”
“Eh?” Ish raised an eyebrow, looking out the window like he was told. “I don’t see anythi—HOLY SHIT WHERE DID THAT BOX COME FROM!?”
Shadow took a look as well, watching as the box buried itself into the ground. “I have a castle to go visit...”
“You are now Twilight Sparkle, Princess of Friendship.” Celestia smiled. “But what is the Princess of Friendship, without her friends?”
“Wait a minute. Where’s my throne?!”
“I don’t think you’re quite there yet.”
“Yes, well, I suppose not.”
Shadow softly cleared his throat. Suddenly gaining the attention of everypony.
“Oh! Hello worst nightmare!” Discord joked. “What brings you here?”
“Oh! Hi, loser!” Shadow remarked. “I didn’t see your sorry ass earlier…”
“Shadie!” Pinkie cheered. “Did you see how huuuuuuge this castle is?”
“How hard is it for you to say Shadow?” Shadow asked. “And yeah. I saw. It’s fuckin’ huge.”
“I still can’t believe there was even an extra throne for me!” Spike thought aloud. “It’s so comfy…” He slowly leaned back further into his small throne.
“So… this is one of the humans that fell through the portal, hm?” Celestia walked up to him.
“You’ve heard of me?”
“Of course. Twilight’s filled me in on the whole ‘portal situation’.” Celestia nodded. “You seemed to have adjusted to living in Equestria faster than the beast did.”
“The beast?” Shadow cocked his head to the side. “The fuck?”
“She’s referring to Jorge.” Twilight pointed out. “When they first encountered, she called him a beast, and now she keeps calling him that just to bother him.”
“Holy shit. The Princess trolls Jorge?” Shadow gawked in awe. “And here I thought you were all stuck-up and shit.”
“Lots of ponies have that assumption.” Celestia shrugged. “I suppose that’s normal. Makes them not want to visit too often. And if you ask me, I like my alone time.”
“Riiight.” Shadow slowly nodded, erasing the new mental image that came to mind.
“Speaking of Jorge…” Applejack spoke up. “Where is the lil' buckaroo?”
"Right... You all... Should come to the hospital with me..."
“The hospital?” Dash immediately shot up. “What happened?”
“Heh… I had to perform some minor first aid"
“Minor first aid?” Dash got closer to the nervous human. “What happened to him?”
“Erm, well. Broke a leg, and an arm. And cracked some ribs along with having second degree burns across his chest and back and partial on his neck."
“What!?”
“...’Kay, if you need me… I’ll be… RUNNING THE FUCK OUT.”
“Damn.” Ish spoke randomly. “Dash is flying so fast… Shadow's only halfway here, and she’s already at the fucking door.”
“Wait. She’s at the fucking door?” He turned around, expecting the prismatic mare to come bursting through the door.
”I’m his marefriend. Look, just tell me what room he’s in, and I’ll be on my way.”
”Oh. In that case, he’s in that room over there.”
Dash bursted through the door. Startling the Asian by the window.
“Shit…” He exhaled sharply. “You took longer to burst through the door than I expected… Didn’t have time to think of a good alibi where I don’t get my ass whooped.”
“What. Happened?” Dash asked angrily.
“I dunno, you didn’t give me much time to think of a good story that doesn’t get me killed,” Ish replied, intentionally disregarding Dash’s anger.
Shadow swiftly entered the room, closing it behind him. He stopped for a moment, and began panting.
Dash narrowed her eyes. “I’m starting to get really mad of you two not answering my question.”
Shadow raised a finger, breathing sharply for a few more seconds. Then finally was able to speak. “It’s all Ish’s fault.”
“Now, now. Let’s not play the blame game here, because it was totally his fault,” Ish replied as he also pointed his finger at Shadow.
“What did you do?” Dash darted her eyes to the Asian.
“I didn’t do anything.” Ish crossed his arms. “I overheard the words ‘buy time’, so I pulled out my wallet and paid some fine ol’pony for some time.”
“Alright. Someone. I don’t care who. But SOMEONE better tell me what happened.” Dash stomped a hoof on the ground. “Now!”
“I saved Ish…”
Dash slowly turned her head to the human in the hospital bed. His right leg and his left arm wrapped in casts, as well as some the second-degree burns along the edges of his face being more visible than earlier.
“Sweet Celestia…” She muttered, walking up to him. “What happened to you…?”
“Tirek was about to blast Ish…” He breathlessly replied. “So I… jumped in and pushed him out of the way…”
Dash gawked as she looked up at the aforementioned human, who appeared to be unscathed in any way.
“Blast me my ass,” Ish crossed his arms. “He was too much of a pussy to even fight me.”
“...Can I punch him?” Dash asked.
“No, you’ll break his bones.” Jorge told her. “Shadow’ll do it.”
“Wait, what!?” Ish stepped back, bumping into the wall. “For once in my life I decide to be selfless, and I’m getting punched for it?”
“Y’know…” Jorge sighed. “I’m starting to regret saving him…”
"Me too..."
Twilight stood near the remnants of the her old home; the Golden Oak Library. The place she’d spent the last several years of her life in.
Suddenly, she felt a hand pat her back. She looked up behind her, seeing a frowning Shadow standing near her.
She looked back at what was left at the castle. “It’s… gone…” She muttered, as small droplets of tears began forming around her eyes. “All of it… gone…”
“Not all of it..." Shadow spoke quietly, kneeling down beside her. “I bet there’s still some books and stuff lying around…”
“No… I checked…” Twilight shook her head. “Everything’s ruined.”
“What about the castle?” Shadow asked. “Aren’t you gonna live there?”
“I suppose…” Twilight wiped her eyes. “But it doesn’t exactly scream home…”
“It could use a little redecorating, but that shouldn’t be a problem…”
“And all my stuff?” Twilight queried. “What are we gonna do about all the lost memories? Hm? Even my spellbook is gone! All that hard work, down the drain!”
“Is that what you’re so worked up about?” Shadow quired quietly, “If that’s the case…”
Twilight looked the human beside her, watching as he pulled Ish’s backpack off of his back, and dug through it.
“What are you…”
“Shhh…” Shadow shushed her. “Aha!” He swiftly pulled her spellbook from out of the bag.
“Wha…” Twilight widened her eyes. “You… You had the book…?”
“Yeah… I saved the book right before you and Tirek started battling it out.” Shadow smiled. “I figured I had to protect it, in case something happened to Ponyville, or the library, even…”
Twilight grabbed the book, and started flipping through the pages, finding every last one of them to be intact. She closed the book softly, and looked up at him, gawking in awe.
“I know you told me not to touch the book. But I had t—” Shadow failed to finish his sentence, finding himself pulled into Twilight’s embrace. He froze for a moment, surprised to see the mare hug him so tightly, but then slowly wrapped his own arms around her.
“Thank you…” She whispered softly. “Thank you so much…”
The two hugged it out for a few good minutes. Every time Shadow would pull back, Twilight would only tighten her embrace, which only had him waiting for her to pull back.
Once she did, she carried a light smile on her face. “At least not all of my things were destroyed…”
Shadow smiled, speaking softly. “I’m glad I was able to save one thing.”
“Me too…” Twilight softly spoke back. “Now. C’mon, let’s go see how Jorge is doing...”

//-------------------------------------------------------//
            Chapter 2-7: A Dare Turned To Love?            
//-------------------------------------------------------//
Chapter 2-7: A Dare Turned To Love?
“I still can’t believe after Jorge saved his life, he still hasn’t thanked him.” Dash grumbled.
“That’s Ish for you.” Shadow shrugged. “He can be a decent friend when you need him to be. But almost all the time he’s just… Ishtaba.”
“Why are you guys friends with him, then?” Dash raised an eyebrow.
“I… don’t know.” Shadow shook his head. “We kinda just got together, and the next thing we knew we were all cool with each other.”
“Was he always that obnoxious, though?” Dash looked at the human next to her.
“Not always. It kinda just… happened randomly and no one seemed to care.”
“I wouldn’t have minded so much if he saved you.” Dash thought aloud. “But… Ishtaba is something else entirely.”
“I’m pretty sure this is just a phase of his.” Shadow attempted to reassure her. “Maybe this is his way of coping of being stuck here…”
“Yeah, well, he better get used to it.” Dash huffed. “I’m not sure how much more I can take.”
“You’ll get used to it.”
“I hope so…” Dash sighed. As they both continued their walk, she turned her head, seeing the remnants of the Golden Oak Library still in its place.
“That reminds me…” She spoke up suddenly. “I heard you saved her spellbook. How did that turn out?”
“Pretty well. I guess.”
“What happened?”
“She hugged me…” Shadow blinked. “She looked at the book, and as I was cheering her up, she pulled me into a hug…”
“Really?” Dash tilted her head to the side. “Did you ask her out yet?”
“N-No... Not yet...”
“Now’s probably the best time to do it.” Dash nudged him. “From the sound of it, you’ve softened her up a lot.”
“How so?”
“Well. Let’s just say every time someone said your name.” Dash cleared her throat softly. “A smile would appear on her face.”
“W-What… R-Really…?”
Dash silently nodded in response. “The girls and I were talking to Twilight about her whole ‘castle’ situation.”
“Castle situation?”
“She’s been… avoiding it.”
“So that’s why she didn’t show up at all last night…”
“Yeah. Well, we all had breakfast earlier today in the castle. And I noticed her spellbook not too far away from the table.” Dash explained. “I asked if she had a backup copy or something, and then she just smiles and tells us you saved the book.”
“Y-Yeah. It wasn’t a big deal, though…”
“To her, it was.” Dash chuckled softly. “We all had a small conversation about you, and every time somepony said your name, she was hiding it, but I could see her smile every time.”
Shadow went wide-eyed. “O-Oh…”
Dash immediately stopped in her tracks. “I have an idea!” She smirked at the oblivious Canadian.
“Eh?” Shadow stopped walking, and turned around to face the mare. “What do you mean you have a plan?”
“Okay. So. We all told Twilight we’d help redecorate the castle to make it feel more like home.”
“Is that why she’s been avoiding it?” Shadow cocked his head. “She told me that it doesn’t exactly scream home earlier, but…”
“Yeah.” Dash nodded. “Anyway, that’s not the point.” She looked at the spa, not too far away from the hospital. “We sent her and Spike to go to the spa to give us some time to surprise her.”
“And?”
“Well, I bailed for a little bit so I could go visit Jorge.” Dash nudged her head towards the hospital. “But I think we’re gonna need to buy a little more time. When I left, things got a little… messy.”
“Oh geez…” Shadow scratched the back of his neck. “So then, what do you want me to do?”
“You know exactly what I want you to do.” Dash’s smirk returned as she finished her sentence.
Shadow thought for a moment on what she was implying. Seconds later, it hit him right in the face, as his eyes widened far beyond than they’ve ever widened before. “You’re not asking me to…”
“I am.”
Shadow gulped. “I was gonna wait a little while longer before I asked Twilight on a date, why now?”
“This is the perfect time to ask her out, Shadow!” Dash groaned. “If you keep on waiting, you’ll never get a shot like this!”
“B-But…!”
“No buts!” Dash interrupted. “You wanna win the bet, don’t you!?”
“This is more than just the bet, isn’t i—”
“Don’t you!?”
“Alright, alright! Of course! I’m not losing a bet to Jorge!”
“Then you’re gonna go to that spa. And you’re going to take that mare out on a date!”
“...Can I at least visit Jorge, first?” Shadow hesitantly spoke.
“No, Jorge can wait.”
Shadow sighed in defeat. “Fine.” He looked at the spa off in the distance. “That’s the spa, right?”
“Yep!”
“Great…”
“Don’t worry.” Dash patted his back. “You’ll do fine. I’ll tell Jorge you said ‘hi’.”
“Wha—”
Shadow looked to his side, no longer seeing Rainbow Dash there. He looked at the hospital, saw her open the doors in front of her.
“This is gonna suck…”
Dash slowly walked into the room, finding a sleeping Jorge in the hospital bed, connected to a heartrate monitor. Her heart broke at the sight of her injured boyfriend.
As she sat down on a chair directly next to the bed. Jorge slowly turned his head, waking up from his slumber. Upon opening his eyes, the first thing he saw was the worried mare in the chair.
“Hey there, Dashie…” He smiled softly.
“Hey, babe…” Dash smiled back. “How’re you holding up?”
“Fine, I guess.” Jorge answered. “What about you? How are you feeling?”
“I’m fine.” Dash shrugged. “The house is lonely without you, y’know.”
Jorge frowned. “I’m sorry, Dashie.” He slowly reached out his good arm, and began caressing the prismatic mare. “Look on the bright side, though. In a day or so, I’ll be out of here, and back home with you.”
“Yeah…” Dash closed her eyes, reveling in the little attention he gave her, despite his injuries. “I just wish Ish would’ve thanked you or something…”
“Oh, don’t worry about that.” Jorge smiled evilly. “Ish owes me a favor from back home. He’s gonna get what’s coming to him.”
Dash laughed at his evil grin, she could only imagine what her boyfriend had in store for that annoying Asian.
“So, I got Shadow to go ask Twilight out.” She pointed out.
“Really?”
“Yeah. I needed somepony to stall her until we got the castle redecorated.” Dash explained. “And ever since Shadow gave Twilight back her book, every time someone says his name, she just smiles.” She giggled softly. “So I figured now was the best time, if any, for him to ask her out.”
“That’s a pretty good plan.” Jorge commented as his hand slowly went from caressing her to cupping her cheek.
Dash smiled warmly at the human’s actions, she softly placed her hoof on top of his hand, and sat there.
“Well, Jorge. I don’t have a whole lot of time to waste.” Dash sighed. “As much as I’d love to spend more time with you, I need to go help the girls decorate the castle, and all that.”
“Could I at least have a kiss, first?” Jorge murmured. “Yesterday ended on such a sour note and I—” All of a sudden, he found himself unable to speak, as his marefriend pressed her lips against his. Not wanting to miss out, he slowly closed his eyes, and kissed back.
Shortly afterwards, Dash pulled back, and slowly kissed his forehead. “I’ll be back, don’t worry.”
“I know you will.” Jorge muttered, his eyes slowly starting to close as he began to fall asleep. “I love you, Dashie…”
“Love you too…” Dash softly smiled, staying in the human’s view until he fell asleep.
“Can’t wait until you’re better…”
Shadow stood against the wall of the spa, waiting for the alicorn mare to walk out.
Surely enough, something purple quickly entered his field of view. He turned his head to see what it was, only to realize it was simply Spike, who was walking up to the impatient human.
“Shadow?” Spike spoke. “What are you doing here?”
"Waiting to talk to Twilight, something important. But it can wait until her spa visit is done."
“It’s gonna take her a good ten, maybe fifteen minutes. You sure you can wait?”
"Yeah Spike, that's alright." Shadow replied, "If your spa is done, then head up to the castle. Me and Twilight will be there... Eventually..."
“I was actually about to head there right now, and see how the girls were doing on redecorating.” Spike shrugged.
"Right, so you do know. Well, they need more time so... Guess who got put on distraction duty. Even though I was needing to talk to her regardless."
“Lucky you, I guess.” Spike chuckled. “Did they say how much time they needed?”
“Not really. I’m just gonna stall for as long as I can, really.” Shadow answered.
“Alright.” Spike nodded. “I’ll leave it up to you, then.” He gave Shadow a thumbs up, and walked out of the spa.
Shadow sighed, and grabbed a nearby magazine, killing time until Twilight returned.
After some time had passed, he heard someone call out his name. He looked towards the source of the sound, seeing Twilight calling out to him. He stood up and walked over to the purple alicorn.
"Oh, hey Twilight. You're done, I see. How was your trip to the spa?" Shadow queried.
"Shadow?” Twilight asked, tilting her head to the side. “What are you doing here?”
“I came to grab you after you were done. Something I want to show you.”
“Uh. Actually, could it wait?” Twilight sheepishly smiled. “I was able to head back to the castle and see how the girls were doing on redecorating it.”
“Well… It’s kind of important…”
“On a scale of one to ten, how importa—”
“Four hundred and twenty.” Shadow interrupted.
“It’s that important?” Twilight asked in disbelief.
“Yes…” Shadow droned. “I wouldn’t be bugging you if it wasn’t important.”
Twilight paused for a moment, deciding what was more important. Returning to her castle? Or kill a little time with whatever Shadow needed help with?
With a nod, Twilight came to a decision. “Alright, sure. What’s up?”
“Okay, Twilight. You can open your eyes now.”
“It’s about time…” Twilight sighed, opening her eyes to find a purple box.
“A… box?” She thought aloud. She slowly picked it up, and looked at the human in front of her before opening it. “...What’s so special about this box?”
“It’s a gift.” Shadow answered. “But. You’re not allowed to open it unless you answer my question correctly.”
“What question?”
“Well… I w-was wondering if… you would like to… go out for dinner or something… tonight…?”
Twilight jerked her head back, going wide-eyed. “A-Are you asking me out on a date?” She asked, as her face started to turn into a bright shade of lilac.
“Y-Yes… I am…” Shadow replied nervously, trying to not look down.
Twilight’s blush deepened, her face becoming more of a dark red. “I-I. Uh. A d-date? T-toni—... “ She stammered, then sighed in an attempt to relax. “Tonight? As in… right now tonight?”
“Well… considering the time… I guess right now tonight is right… Yeah…”
“W-Well… I… U-Uh…” Twilight looked down at the box in her grasp, then looked back to the nervous human.
Soon enough, she smiled, further assuring the human. “Where to?”
“Can I open the box now?” Twilight whined. “You told me I could open this darn thing if I answered your question correctly.”
“I know, but I thought I’d add some suspense into it.” Shadow shrugged. “I mean, I haven’t had a whole lot of time here in Equestria, but I’ve spent a lot of time and effort into this gift.”
“So can I open it, then?”
“Not yet!” Shadow shook his head, stealing the box from the impatient mare. “Not until we get back to the castle.”
“Fine…” Twilight huffed. At first she was angry about not being allowed to open the box, but then she slowly softened up, and got closer to the human. “...I had a great time, by the way…”
“Really?”
“Mhm.” Twilight hummed softly. “I don’t know how you paid for it all, but the food was amazing. And the little talks we had were enjoyable.”
“Glad you had a good time.” Shadow smiled.
Twilight nodded with a hum, “So, in a few days, I wanted to test the transformation spell. And since Rainbow Dash doesn’t want me using Jorge as a test subject anymore, I was wondering if yo—”
“I volunteer Ishtaba.”
Twilight chortled at Shadow’s interruption.
“If Ish gets no side effects, then I’ll do it. It feels… Odd being human in a world filled with Ponies.” Shadow added.
“Jorge and Rainbow Dash seem to be completely fine with it.” Twilight pointed out.
“This is Jorge we’re talking about. And this is Rainbow Dash we’re fuckin’ talking about.” Shadow countered. “I’m not like Jorge, where he abuses his hands… and, I don’t know… Did it um… Feel weird for you to go on a date with a human?”
“It was… interesting, to say the least.” Twilight shrugged. “Not a bad interesting, it was just… interesting.”
“Well, it seemed alright to me, I mean. Dash and Jorge are doing well.” Shadow admitted. “So… Didn’t seem weird like it would of a while ago.”
“Actually, between you and me…” Twilight looked at him. “Rainbow Dash has been asking me every now and then about that transformation spell you finished.”
“What’s she planning on doing with it?”
“It’s more of a ‘later’ plan that she has…” Twilight rolled her eyes. “I’m not sure how it works in your world, but for ponies to have foals, we have an estrus cycle.”
“So, like, being on your period.”
“What?” Twilight jerked her head back, then quickly shook her head. “Nevermind. Uh, so, during the cycle, when two ponies… er… mate. Then they’re guaranteed to have a foal.”
“Unless he pulls out.”
“Anyways.” Twilight attempted to move on. “Any other time where the mare isn’t in estrus—”
“Basically in heat.”
“Let me finish!” Twilight nudged him softly, giggling at his latest remark. “Then it’s perfectly fine, we can’t get pregnant unless we’re ‘in heat’, to put it bluntly.”
“Wait, so, Dash wants to get pregnant?” Shadow widened his eyes.
“Not exactly.” Twilight shook her head. “It’s a ‘later plan’ of hers. If you haven’t figured it out, Jorge and Dash can’t conceive for… obvious reasons.”
“So you mean to tell me he nev—”
“Don’t you dare finish that sentence!” Twilight interjected. “So, Dash had a plan, in case they ever wanted to start a family—Which I don’t think they would ever do—she’d have him already be a stallion by then.”
“So, do you think she’s trying to ease him into letting you use the spell on him?”
“Probably.” Twilight nodded. “The last time I mentioned this spell to him was when I first started working on it about a year ago.”
“How did that turn out?”
“I asked him—when the spell was done—if he wanted the spell to be used on him, so he wouldn’t be the only human in equestria, he’d be just like all of us.” Twilight explained. “He simply replied back with ‘No, I like my hands. Thank you very much.’”
“That’s Jorge for you…” Shadow sighed, stopping as they finally made it to their destination. Like a gentleman, he opened the door, allowing Twilight to go through.
“Aren’t you coming in?” Twilight asked hopingly. “I was hoping we could both see how the castle turned out together…”
“As much as I’d love to, I promised Jorge I’d go visit him today…” Shadow’s lips curled down, creating a small frown. “I know he’s getting out in a few days, but he still needs someone to keep him company.”
“What about Rainbow Dash?”
“Dash brings smooches and love. I bring the laughter and stupidity he needs.”
“Hm. Fair enough.” Twilight sighed. “Come back soon, though…” She took the box from his grasp, and slowly walked into her castle, but then quickly turned around as a thought appeared. “Oh, and… Shadow?”
“Yeah?” Shadow spoke, but quickly found his speech cut off as Twilight stood on her rear legs, and pecked his lips.
“Thanks… again…” In an instant, she ran back into the castle.
“Um...” Shadow softly uttered as he stood there in shock for a moment.
He quickly shook it off, and let go of the door. Wanting to get on with the rest of the day, he quickly made his way back to the hospital. As he made his way, he saw a familiar pegasus walk out of the hospital doors.
“Heya, Rainbow Dash.” Shadow spoke up. “Just visited Jorge?”
“Mhm.” Dash nodded. "So... You uh, ask out Twilight?”
"Nope."
"WHAT DO YOU MEAN ‘NOPE’!?’"
“Just kidding.” Shadow grinned wildly.
“Ha ha.” Dash rolled her eyes. “So, how did it go?”
“Pretty well.”
“So, then you actually went out on a date with her?”
“Well, if it went ‘pretty well’...” Shadow chuckled.
“Ah.” Dash uttered. “I’d ask you to tell me the details, but it’s late, and I’m tired…”
“Alright. See ya later, Dash.”
“Mhm. See you later…” Dash nodded with a yawn. Her wings spread open, and she took off, back home.
He walked closer to the door, but then was interrupted by Ishtaba opening the door in front of him.
“Ish?” He called out.
“What?”
“Were you visiting Jorge too?”
“Uh. Kinda. You see, I’m in a predicament….uh… I kinda had sex… with a pony…” Ish scratched the back of his head. “And… now she thinks I’m her boyfriend… and… shit. The worst part is… she’s fucking crazy...help...”
“Oh…” Shadow nodded, pretending he actually cared. “Well. I’ll just go inside and visit Jorge…”
“Yeah, yeah. I gotta figure out how to deal with this fucking shit, anyway.”
Shadow simply walked past him, and made his way to the hospital, and then to Jorge’s door. He slowly opened it, finding the injured human lying in bed.
“Hiya, Jorge…” He muttered.
Jorge turned his head, seeing the Canadian man. “Hiya, Shadow.” He smiled. “I was beginning to think you wouldn’t show up.”
“Nah, man.” Shadow shook his head. “I’m not gonna leave you hanging like that.”
Jorge’s smile grew wider at his friend’s act of kindness. “So, how was your day, then? Cause mine was just lying down in this bed.”
“Well… I went on a date with Twilight.” Shadow sheepishly smiled.
“Oh? So that means I lose the bet.”
“Yeah, but Ish still owes you that favor, right?”
“Yeah, that’s why I’m not too worried.” Jorge chuckled. “Well? C’mon! You gotta tell me how it went!”
“Well…”
Twilight calmly sat down, holding the box in her hooves. She slowly opened it, until she was able to see what was in the box.
“A… book?”
She opened the book, and slowly read through the first couple of pages.
“Oh, Shadow… You big dope...”
Author's Note
What's in the book, you ask?
...You can wait a couple of chapters to find out, can't you?

//-------------------------------------------------------//
          Chapter 2-8: And A Cult Turned To Sh*t           
//-------------------------------------------------------//
Chapter 2-8: And A Cult Turned To Sh*t
Ishtaba casually hid behind a bush in the most fabulous way possible, spying on the familiar, but less awesome human and pegasus as they talked.
“I still can’t believe after Jorge saved his life, he still hasn’t thanked him.”
“That’s Ish for you. He can be a decent friend when you need him to be. But almost all the time he’s just… Ishtaba.”
“I… don’t know. We kinda just got together, and the next thing we knew we were all cool with each other.”
“Was he always that obnoxious, though?”
“Should I be offended at that?” He thought. “Nah, let’s just assume they’re just praising me.”
“I wouldn’t have minded so much if he saved you. But… Ishtaba is something else entirely.”
He scoffed at their conversation. Deciding he heard enough, he quietly escaped the area, letting the two talk about how purely amazing he is.
As he continued his walk, he walked by a unicorn mare who looked like a mint to him.
Ironically enough, she noticed his charmingness, too.
“Shit, did she see me stare at her ass?” Ish thought as he tried to nonchalantly look away. “Fuck. She noticed, now she’s staring at MY ass. Whatever you do, don’t look back at her ass.”
He looked back at her ass.
“FUCK! I DID IT AGAIN” he screamed inside his head. “Shit, she’s coming closer… Quick think of something smart to say… ‘Ay girl you shit with dat ass?’ Wait, what, why was that the first thing I thought of… PLAN B, MY NAME IS JORGE!”
“G-Godson?” Lyra cocked her head to the side. “I-Is that you?”
“JORGE!?” Ish exclaimed. “YOU MISTOOK ME FOR THAT CUBAN!?” he screamed as he began to realise he did the exact opposite of what he intended. “Shit. Do I even have a Plan C? There’s still Shadow I can impersonate… Nah, fuck it, let’s have some fun with this pony...”
“W-Well, I didn’t think there were other humans in Equestria…” Lyra explained. “I… uh… I thought it was just God—”
“Let me answer that question for you. No, you were horribly wrong.” he interrupted charismatically as his eyes began to drift behind the mint pony.
“O-Oh…” Lyra uttered. “Uh… How many of you guys are there?”
“The only one you need to worry about right now is, me” Ish stated as he walked into a position where the sun would perfectly capture his glory.
“U-Uh… Okay?” Lyra raised an eyebrow. “I didn’t realize humans were so…”
“Perfect? No, that’s only me.”
“I was gonna say ‘obnoxious’.”
“Blame Jorge,” Ish crossed his arms. “It’s his fault I’m here, anyway.”
“Who’s ‘Jorge’?” Lyra tilted her head to the side. “Are you referring to Godson?” She gasped at a sudden thought. “Do you guys have like, code names for each other!?”
“Sure, let’s go with that.”
“Ooh!” Lyra bounced at the response. “What’s your code name? Can I be a part of it, too!?”
“You can refer to me as...King.”
“Okay… King.” Lyra nodded. “What would my code name be?”
“You’ll get one after you listen to what I’m about to say. Now, as part of being part of our code names; you must obey all my commands, to follow me to the edges of the world, to swear loyalty, and to never abandon my side. Deal?”
“Deal.”
“I hereby dub thee ‘Tic-Tac’!” exclaimed Ish, as he began to wonder how far he could go with this pony.
“Ooooh. Tic-Tac…” She repeated. “That’s a cool code name!”
“I aim to please,” Ish smiled.
“So, King. What are you doing walking around Ponyville, anyway?”
“Well.... I can’t seem to remember. Can you hold this?” Ish said as he held out an empty hand. “I’m gonna go for a walk and see if I can remember why I started in the first place.”
‘Tic-Tac’ gasped. “A human hannnnnd…” She quickly grabbed his hand with her hoof. “Sure!”
“Wait, what… If this was a human girl, she would’ve just laughed and said ‘No,’ by now…” Ish thought as the miracle known as his mind began to contemplate what else to do. “Have I mentioned that back where I’m from, I was worshiped?”
“Really?” ‘Tic-Tac’ asked curiously. “Even by Godson?”
“Oh yeah, especially him. I used to have thousands of people following my every command, catering to all my needs. But here, I only have Godson and Shadow. It would be nice to expand my following. In fact, I think you’re first pony I’ve offered an invitation to. You should feel flattered,” Ish stated as his magnificent eyes locked into ‘Tic-Tac’s’.
‘Tic-Tac’s’ face quickly started to turn into a shade of pink, like the pink from a box of Valentine’s day hearts. “I-I… don’t know w-what to say…” She began to mutter.
“Say nothing then. If you hurry, you can build a shrine dedicated to me by sundown. And I’ll be truly grateful,” Ish said as he began to wonderfully stare off into the distance.
“Heh…” ‘Tic-Tac’ scratched the back of her neck. “Funny thing about that… I already have a shrine to humans…”
“This makes it all the more easier…”
“Not good enough.” Ish simply stated.
“W-What... H-How…?” stuttered ‘Tic-Tac’.
“It needs more me.”
“What do you mean more you?
“Well for starters, there isn’t a portion dedicated to me. Actually, screw that; it needs to be dedicated to me entirely.”
“But I know nothing about you…”
“Well good thing I’m here then, because how else are you supposed to learn about the perfection known as Ishtaba?” he queried, raising an eyebrow. “Now first things first, you need to paint a portrait of me in the style of ‘The Creation of Adam’.”
“The creation of Adam? What's that?” asked a confused ‘Tic-Tac’, scratching her head.
“It’s a painting that… Let me just draw you what it looks like…” said an unamused Ish as he performed his magical counterfeiting skills and completely recreated the painting perfectly. “Now instead of this guy over here, you have me. But, this big guy over here stays.”
“Wait, but if you could do that, couldn’t you have just drawn yourself?”
“Uh, no. What kind of god draws his own shrine memeorabilia? The fuck do you think I am? Jorge?”
“Uh, I think you meant memorabil—”
“No. It’s MEMEorabilia.” Ish crossed his arms. “Now draw.”
‘Tic-Tac’ simply shrugged, and did as she was told.
“Not bad, Tic-Tac.” Ish nodded softly. “Not bad at all.”
“You really think so?” ‘Tic-Tac’ raised an eyebrow. “I think I may have mixed up what you originally asked for…”
“Nah.” Ish patted ‘Tic-Tac’s’ back. “Actually, you made it better. You captured my likeness really well. I originally meant to replace the guy on the left with me, but you did the most wonderful thing and drew me exactly how fabulous I am.”
“Oh?” ‘Tic-Tac’ looked back at the painting, then back at Ish. “Y’know. The more I look at it, you’re right!”
“I am?” Ish was caught off guard. “I-I mean… I am!”
“Y’know, King…” ‘Tic-Tac’ smirked softly. “I didn’t expect you to be so… oh, what’s the word…? Smart, clever, so...” She gasped, finally finding the right word to use. “So perfect.”
“Now she’s speaking my language!” Ish mentally cheered.
WIth a roll of the eyes, Ish smirked back. “Yeah. I know. My perfection gets the best of me more times than I can count…”
“I can tell.” Lyra nodded slowly. “With a mind so great as yours, it’s no wonder why everyone worshipped you!”
“I know, right!?” Ish’s smirk grew into a full blown smile. “I’m fucking irresistible!”
“I’ll bet all the girls back in your world wouldn’t let their hands off of you!”
“DAMN RIGHT THEY DON’T!” Ish stomped a foot on the ground. “EVERY GIRL IN MY WORLD WANTE—NO WAIT, NEEDED A PIECE OF ME!”
‘Tic-Tac’ gawked in awe. “...Could… Could I have a piece?”
“...What?”
“I… I can’t resist, King.” ‘Tic-Tac’ growled softly, walking towards her prey. “I want you… I need you!”
“Shit. I think she’s trying to rape me.” Ish thought. “Should I let her or should I…”
“Hell yeah you need me!” He nodded. “Bitch! I’m fabulous!”
“Fuck. No going back now…”
“What have I done…?”
‘Tic-Tac’ tightened her grip on the asian. “So, King… Did you enjoy it as much as I did?”
“I just had sex with a horse…”
“...And I liked it…”
“What’s wrong with me?”
‘Tic-Tac’ slowly buried her face in Ish’s neck, sensually licking him. “Do you think… you have enough energy for… Round Two?”
“OH GOD NO.”
“U-Uh... “ Ish instantly sat up, forcing himself out of ‘Tic-Tac’s’ grasp. “S-Sorry, I… Uh… I have something I need to take care of…” Quickly getting out of bed, and grabbing his clothes. “M-Maybe later…”
“Fuck. I just gave her the opportunity for ‘later’.”
“Oh.” ‘Tic-Tac’ blinked. “Alright…”
As soon as all his clothes were in his hands, he swiftly ran out the door, and out of the pony’s house altogether.
“Time for me to live on the run...”
Author's Note
The chapter's shorter than all the earlier ones, but you need to understand that I literally lost brain cells trying to write this... I wanted to finish this as fast as I could so I could get it over with.
Ish's cult went to sh*t so fast that he didn't even have a chance to get to a decent start... rip Ish.

//-------------------------------------------------------//
       Chapter 2-9: "It's not what it looks like..."       
//-------------------------------------------------------//
Chapter 2-9: "It's not what it looks like..."
“You can’t hiber— you know. What about all the primo things we're gonna do together this winter? Building snow ponies, starting snowball fights, sipping hot cider by the fire?”
“Yawn…”
Jorge walked past the mare and her turtle, shrugging off the need to intervene.
“This is an actual event…” He thought. “I can’t screw around here…”
“Don't you wanna do those things with me?!”
He winced at the mare’s actions. “Then again… I’m pretty sure dating her has already screwed up enough. I haven’t seen the girls go after Starlight Glimmer, or anything…” With a gulp, he looked back at the mare behind him.
“Think, Rainbow Dash, think! Tank's only hibernating because it's cold, right? Well, I'd rather have him awake in the heat than asleep in the cold…” Dash gasped. “I just have to stop winter!”
“You just have to stop what?” Jorge intervened. “Did I hear that right? You’re planning on stopping winter?”
Dash blinked. “When did you get here?”
“You were so focused on Tank, you didn’t even see me pass by.”
“Really?” Dash cocked her head to the side.
“You do realize Shadow is Canadian, right?”
“What’s that have to do with anything?”
“It means he lives in the winter for 7 months a year, Dash.” Jorge facepalmed. “You take winter away from a Canadian. Shadow, specifically, then you’re never going to hear the end of it.”
“Then what about Tank?” Dash asked.
“You have Linda, and you have me.” Jorge pointed a thumb at himself. “I get he’s your pet and all. But this is something that has to happen.”
Dash looked at her turtle, who was slowly digging a hole for him to sleep in.
“But…”
“Anything Tank could do, I could do ten times better, Dash.” Jorge interrupted. “I may have just gotten out of the hospital five days ago, but I’m feeling fine!” He cleared his throat. “I, uh. I’m not sure how my leg and my arm got better so fast, though. If you ask me, I blame all the magic that’s in the air.”
“Your burns are still there, though.” Dash countered.
“They’re a lot better, actually.” Jorge shrugged. “I just have to keep using that cream the doctor told me to use, and it’ll be gone in no time.”
“Hmph.” Dash huffed. “You really think anything Tank could do, you could do better?”
“I don’t think. I know.”
Dash looked at Tank once more, whom was slowly closing his eyes. She sighed in defeat, and walked up to the turtle. “Once Winter’s over, I’m coming right back here to get you. Okay?” She asked him.
Tank slowly nodded.
“Good.” Dash smiled. She quickly turned around to face her human. “As for you.”
“Hm?”
“Before we start doing all of our awesome winter stuff, I need to get something done.” She smirked wildly.
“Oh?”
“I don’t like these. I don’t like these one bit.”
“Aw, c’mon Jorge! You look adorable! Those slippers have quite the effect on you…”
“What kind of ‘effect’?”
“The kind that makes you look 20% cooler!”
“Wearing these slippers?” Jorge groaned, pointing to his new cyan slippers, with the front end of them being a tiny version of his marefriend’s head. “How’d you even get them made so fast!?”
“Uh… I have my ways.”
“And what about you? Why aren’t you wearing these?” Jorge continued through his whining.
“Because I have something else to wear.”
“And what pray-tell would that be?”
Dash turned around, grabbing another pair of slippers from behind her. “These.”
“THE HELL ARE THOSE?”
“You’re wearing slippers with a tiny me. I’m gonna wear slippers with a tiny you!” Dash cheered with a grin.
“SERIOUSLY. THE HELL ARE THOSE?!”
Dash deadpanned. “You’re wearing those slippers, and I’m wearing these. End of discussion.”
“But…”
“No buts!” Dash interjected. “You said you could do better than Tank? Now you gotta stick to your word.”
Jorge looked at his slippers, then at hers. At first, he thought the idea to be weird, but the more he kept looking at his slippers, the more he seemed to like wearing them.
“Fine.” He crossed his arms. “But only cause you’re wearing those slippers, too.”
“Of course.”
“Y’know. I kinda wonder what Twilight and Shadow have been up to for the past few hours.”
“I know, right?” Dash looked at her boyfriend. “I saw her earlier, but then she went back into the castle for something, and never came back out.”
“Do you think maybe she got lost in there?”
“Nah.” Dash shook her head. “Twilight? Get lost in her castle? Yeah, right.”
“Then what do you think she’s doing?”
“I dunno.” Dash shrugged. “We’re gonna find out in a second anyway.”
Jorge nodded in response, letting the conversation die out on it’s own, until they finally reached the castle. He slowly opened the door, letting Dash go through first. Once she had gone in, he followed suit.
“Twilight?” Dash called out softly. “Are you in here?”
Jorge slowly closed the door behind him. “Did you ever stop to wonder that maybe she’s sleeping?”
“At this time?” Dash scoffed. “Nah. She’s doing something, and I’m gonna find out what!”
“Dash, are you sure that’s such a good idea?” Jorge asked worriedly. “I mean… What if Twilight’s doing something private.”
Dash scoffed once more. “Twilight is as innocent as Fluttershy, Jorge. She would nev—”
She froze right in her tracks, gawking in complete awe and shock at the sight she had now seen.
“Dash…?” Jorge got closer. “What’s wro—Oh… Oh…”
Jorge and Dash simply stood and watched as their friends—Twilight and Shadow—lied down on a couch, him pinning her down as they made out.
“Holy sh—” Jorge tried to speak, but was instantly cut off by Dash’s hoof.
Shadow looked up, hearing the sudden voice, “Um… It’s not what it looks like…”
Twilight raised an eyebrow, but then looked at what Shadow was looking at. “Ohh… Hi, guys…”
“Not what it looks like, huh?” Jorge asked.
“Cause it looks like you two are making out…” Dash added.
“Oh. Then, uh, it is what it looks like.” Shadow sheepishly smiled.
“How long has… this… been a thing?” Jorge asked.
“Uh… How long was it since my first date with Twi?” Shadow raised an eyebrow.
“...Five days?”
“Five days.”
“Really? Five days?”
“Five days.” Shadow nodded. “Want me to say it again?”
“N—”
“Five days.”
“Alright. Uh… Just answer me this one question. And, uh… It’s gonna be a personal one…”
“Shoot.”
“Have you uh…” Jorge cleared his throat. “...had sex with Twilight?”
“Why the hell do you wan—”
“Answer the damn question you Canadian faggot.”
“Um… Maybe…”
Jorge shrugged. “I’ll take that as a yes. Alright, one more question. You do realize you’ve basically made your relationship with Twilight official?”
“I’m pretty sure we’ve been a couple since day two, bro.”
“Did you have sex with her on day two?
“N—”
“Then shut up, faggot.” Jorge interjected. “You’ve basically put yourself one step away to marriage.”
“Did I?”
“Yeah. I didn’t think I’d have to mention this to you this soon.” Jorge sighed. “Ish, I expected. But not you.”
“I’m okay with this.”
“Are you?” Jorge raised an eyebrow. “There’s almost no turning back, now, Shadow. If you plan on turning back, you’re gonna go through hell. Or in this world’s case, tartarus.”
“I know. I never wanted to turn back after Day One.” Shadow replied. “If I wanted to turn back I would of refused the dare.”
“But I didn’t expect you to buck her!” Jorge shouted. “You made a home-run faster than Dash and I have ever did in our relationship! At least Dash was patient enough to wait a couple of weeks.”
“Speaking of that dare…” Shadow suddenly remembered. “Did you tell Ish to eat his shoe?”
“Not yet.” Jorge shook his hand in a shooing manner. “Don’t try to change the subject! Five days, and you already had sex with her…” He started rubbing his head, wiping away the headache that was slowly arising. “I’m still trying to wrap my head around that…”
“And two weeks isn’t fast, either?”
“It’s slower than five friggin days!” Jorge retorted. “How the hell did it even happen?”
“It was all Twilight’s fault!”
“It was all Shadow’s fault!”
“How the hay was it Shadow’s fault!?” Dash went wide-eyed. “Did he rape you or something!?”
“What!? No!” Twilight quickly spoke. “As you could see, I was obviously enjoying it…”
“But... Why so fast…?”
“Have you seen the book he wrote?”
“What book?” Dash tilted her head to the side.
“This one...” Twilight spoke softly, using her magic to levitate the book over to Dash.
Dash grabbed the book from the air, quickly opened it, and flipped to a random page.
“Twilight, I think you’re beautiful. I think you're beautiful because of so many things, I don't think I'll be able to fit them all into this. But I’ll try to fit a lot. So... Where to start... Well... Your eyes, they sparkle, you may not think they do, but I can see it and see the caring and loving you, your sweetness and cuteness your smile, that’s like the cherry on top of your beautifulness. It is soo sweet, and it is literally the best thing in the world. I love your smile, it literally makes my day and raises my spirits. Your smile is amazing and your eyes sparkle in the sunlight. Your hugs are amazing, and make me feel loved in this strange world that I now call home. Just seeing you and being in your presence brings me comfort. You are perfect, and your mane, is so soft and it shines in the sunlight. I see you as a very beautiful, amazing, funny, smart, caring, loving, sweet mare. You are truly amazing and beautiful, it’s hard for me to put every reason I think your beautiful into this because there are so many reasons.”
“W-Wow…” She uttered. “This is… beautiful…”
“Mhm…” Twilight hummed with a nod.
“No. Like, seriously. Wow…” Dash sighed. “I WISH MY BOYFRIEND DID SOMETHING LIKE THIS!”
“Shit. I think she just read the book.” Jorge cursed.
“Damn. When Dash shouts, she shouts.” Shadow muttered. “They’re like, two rooms away, and we still heard her scream.”
“Why do you think I want to soundproof my ro—”
“Please don’t finish that sentence.”
Jorge shrugged. “And that’s why I don’t let people sleep over.”
“Remind me never to.” Shadow shuddered at the new mental image.
“So, you really love Twilight, huh?”
“No shit, sherlock.”
“Are you sure it wasn’t just cause you were desperate to get laid already?”
“HELL NO!”
“Hmph. And then you guys talk crap about my relationship.” Jorge crossed his arms.
“In my defense.” Shadow spoke up. “I made fun of your relationship before I got into one with Twilight.”
“Speaking of being made fun of. You know Ish will never let this go, right?”
“I don’t give a fuck.”
“Of course you don’t.” Jorge rolled his eyes. “How many pages did you say were in that book, again?”
“11.”
“Why Eleven?”
“My lucky number.”
“Of course it is.”
“Are all eleven pages the same?”
“Nope.” Twilight shook her head. “They’re all different.”
“Hm.” Dash hummed softly. “I’d complain to Jorge about not doing something like this, but he already offered to take Tank’s place during hibernation.”
“Well, at least he’s proving how much he loves you.” Twilight smiled warmly.
“Yeah. I guess you’re right.” Dash smiled back. “It might not be as romantic as Shadow’s book, but it’s the thought that counts, right?”
“Mhm.” Twilight nodded.
Suddenly, Dash had a thought. “Heh.” She chortled. “The only three humans in Equestria, and we’re dating two of ‘em. I don’t know why, but I have a feeling Ish is gonna end up alone.”
“Rainbow!”
“I’m not wrong, am I?”
“W-Well… You never know.”
“We’re talking about Ishtaba, Twilight.” Dash pointed out. “I don’t see how anypony would fall in love with him.”
“HEY FAGGOTS!”
“Did you hear that?” Twilight’s ear twitched at the sudden shouting.
“Hear what?” Dash questioned.
“I’M FUCKING TIRED OF HIDING FROM TIC-TAC!”
“That.” Twilight groaned.
“Yeah, sounded like Ish.”
“Exactly…”
“...And ever since then, I’ve been avoiding Tic-Tac.”
“Lyra.” Jorge corrected.
“I don’t give a fuck what her name is…” Ish rolled his eyes, then shifted his view to Twilight. “So, could you please help me? I wouldn’t be asking for help unless I was desperate.”
“Hm. I think I have just the spell.” Twilight smirked. “Shadow, get the spellbook.”
Shadow nodded, walking off to a nearby bookstand, and began flipping through the pages.
“Are we using that spell?”
“Mhm.” Twilight nodded. “Now’s a better time than never.”
“Uh… What spell are we talking about, exactly?” Ish went wide-eyed. “I wanna make sure what you guys are doing so I can change my mind…”
Shadow brought the book to Twilight, already opened up to the correct page. “Here ya go, Twi.”
Twilight smiled softly, reading through the book in his grasp. After she read and understood what she needed to do, her horn began to glow in her trademark purple aura. She pointed her horn directly at Ish, and stood still for a short moment, waiting for her magic to build up.
Seconds later, a beam shot straight at Ish. As it came into contact, the effects of the spell took immediate effect. A large, blinding light surrounded Ish, preventing not only himself from seeing what was going on, but preventing everyone else from being able to see him.
The light slowly dimmed, and everyone gawked in awe at Ish’s new form He was the most radiant glow of white, his eyes were framed by large black circles. Coincidently, his ears were practically black, as where all his legs and the areas surrounding the front two, and his cutie mark looked like a strange looking face.
“Hm.” Twilight placed a thinking hoof on her chin, quickly levitating a paper and quill.
“Subject appears to be fine after use of the transformation spell. Going from Human to stallion, subject appears to have completely transformed, as well as a cutie mark arrived with his new form.” Twilight spoke as she wrote. “While the spell supposedly gives the subject a basic knowledge of their new form, I have yet to see if this is true or false.”
“Huh?” Ish raised an eyebrow, shifting his vision to Jorge. “Holy fuck. Why is Jorge so fuckin’ tall?”
“You’re a pony, Ish.” Shadow rolled his eyes. “Did you not hear Twilight talking to herself?”
“I wasn’t paying attention…” Ish admitted. “Was I supposed to?”
Shadow sighed. “Knowing you, I’m not surprised…”
“So this is what’d you look like as a pony…” Jorge kneeled over to get a better look. “To be honest, I thought you’d look a little more… asian.”
“That’s racist.” Ish blankly stated..
As Ish was given a mirror, he looked at himself, getting a look at his new body, until he noticed the face tattooed to his flank.
“The fuck is this!?”
“That represents what your destiny is.” Shadow explained. “From the looks of it, your destiny is to be a troll..”
“Damn right it is.” Ish smirked. “And now that I’m a pony… I can go tell Lyra that ‘Ishtaba’ is dead. And then I’m coming back here to get myself turned back.”
“But… if you turn yourself back… won’t it be obvious that you’re not dead?” Twilight cocked her head to the side.
“Nah.” Ish shook his head. “I got this.” He quickly ran out the castle, somehow knowing how to move around in his new form.
Twilight immediately looked back to her notes. “It appears the subject knows how to walk, as well as run in his new form. The spell looks like it’s a complete success.”
“Of course it's a complete success, I finished it.” Shadow replied to the note taking mare.
“Wait, so, you tested the spell on Ish without knowing if it would work?” Dash raised an eyebrow.
“Well, we weren’t gonna test it on Jorge, were we?” Shadow asked. “And I sure as hell wasn’t going to risk myself.”
“...Good point.” Dash chortled.
“Speaking of which, now that we know it works, Twi.” Shadow looked at the alicorn. “Zap me.”
“Eh?” Twilight jerked her head to face the human.
“Zap me.” Shadow repeated flatly. “If I’m gonna be stuck here, I might as well live like the rest of the population.”
“Uh… Alright.” Twilight replied hesitantly, “You sure you want to do this…?”
“Yeah, I’m sure, Twi.”
“Alright…”
“Ish is… dead…?”
“Yeah, right before he died, he, uh… He told me that if he did die, that I should tell you that even though he spent only a few days with you, he loved you with all his heart.” Ish lied. “And if you saw another human who was nearly identical to him in every way, even having the same friends. It’s not him.”
“Huh?”
“Yeah, see, uh. From what I remember… Humans look nearly identical to each other, sometimes you’ll find five people who look and sound exactly the same. Some of them even having the same name.” Ish somehow continued to make up more lies. “He told me that his friends knew someone who had the same name and everything identical to him.” He scratched the back of his head. “It’s… really easy to lose your identity since there’s so many people who like alike.”
“I see…” Lyra frowned. “Alright then, uh… thanks for uh… telling me…”
Before Ish could say another word, the door closed in front of him, and he could very clearly hear the sounds of crying and sobbing coming from inside the house.
Shrugging, Ish simply turned around, and made his way back to the castle.
The light had just faded as the alicorn, prismatic pegasus and human stood gawking at the newly transformed Shadow. He was a dark greyish stallion pegasus of a slightly stockier build than ish, with multiple shades of purple in his long smooth flowing mane and shorter but just as smooth tail with dark purple eyes, and his cutie mark was a black and purple flame.
https://camo.derpicdn.net/6d9086152eab1169bd2a840c5a8a4d5c64e5c6d1?url=https%3A%2F%2Flh6.googleusercontent.com%2FladRUy6h7vuPbeP8_6zHojzwf_3pE9PdsS-S2KBtvD5iXeHN1I7-ClL4D3aJqpPzZTDXKAo5pEAzAbn5I5ZGqhFQWjyaO7sev1PEvBrqTA7ih0h3XKGzzRO8bv83t4M-zw
“Wow…” Twilight muttered.
“H-How does it feel…?” Jorge asked. “...Being a pony?”
“Eh, It feels… Different... That’s for sure.”
“Hey, he’s a pegasus!” Dash cheered, pointing at his new wings. “Sweet!”
“Yes, but he’s my pegasus.” Twilight replied.
“Pfft.” Dash scoffed. “I don’t care. I got this idiot.”
Jorge simply crossed his arms, and grumbled something incoherent.
“What was that?” Dash looked up at the only human left in the room.
“Huh? Nothing. Love you.” Jorge smiled innocently.
“Thought so.”
From the corner of his eye, Jorge noticed something starting to poke out of pony-Shadow’s head.
Jorge turned his head completely, now seeing the object grow from the top of his head. “The hell is that…?”
Twilight looked back at the stallion as well, noticing something pointy quickly growing from the top of his head, the more it grew, the more she could fully identify what exactly it was.
“That’s… unexpected…” She muttered.
“And by ‘unexpected’, you mean you had absolutely no idea Shadow was gonna be an alicorn by using this spell?” Jorge raised an eyebrow.
“Well it’s a one-in-three chance for any pony form, really.” Twilight explained. “Only way to be an alicorn… uh, I’m not sure, actually. I guess either be born an alicorn or turned into one by Celestia.”
“Right, forgot you were turned into one.” Jorge thought aloud. “So then… what’s going on here?”
Shadow simply raised an eyebrow, and slowly reached a hoof at the growing appendage.
“Wait, stop!” Twilight shouted, spooking the stallion.
As soon as it reached it’s peak of growth, it stopped. Everyone was suddenly curious at the sight before them. Twilight turned her head back to grab her quill and notepad with her magic, only for Jorge to nudge her slightly. She looked back, and saw the stallion’s horn beginning to twitch ever-so-slightly.
Then, in a matter of seconds, the horn quickly shrunk back into his head, continuing until it no longer existed.
“Uh…” Jorge uttered. “So, that happened…”
“Hm.” Twilight hummed. “Might have just been a side-effect from the spell, perhaps his body didn’t handle his new form as well as Ishtaba’s… Shadow, want to try to fly and see if the spell worked correctly?”
As Shadow slowly unfolded his new wings he thought aloud. “I should know how to do this, so… Guess I can give it a try.” He slowly began moving his wings up and down in a flapping motion, adjusting to them. Then quickly jumped up, and flapped them faster, lifting himself off the ground, and successfully keeping himself in the air.
Twilight levitated her quill and another piece of paper. She began speaking aloud as she wrote once more. “After using the spell once more, the latest human subject also appears to have successfully transformed, with a minor side effect. It’s possible that his body attempted to reject his new form, as a horn quickly grew and shrank into non-existence. However, much like with Ishtaba, Shadow appears to have the the basic knowledge required to use his new body correctly. He has proved this by instead of walking, but flying, meaning if the spell was used on someone else, and the result ended up being a unicorn. That subject, in theory, should know how to use basic magic.”
“So, Jorge.” Dash spoke up. “Now that everyone’s going pony, what about you?”
“Nah.” Jorge shook his head. “I’ve said it before, and I’ll say it again. I like having my hands.”
Dash simply rolled her eyes.
“Hey uh, Dash.” Shadow spoke softly.
“Hm?” Dash looked up at the new pegasus.
“I uh, may need some flying lessons…”
“But you already know how to fly. Right?”
“Yeah but, I mean ‘Dash style flying’ lessons.”
“Ahh.” Dash smirked. “So you wanna fly like me, eh?” She chuckled softly. “Alright, sure. I’ve always wanted a protege...”
“What about Scootaloo?” Jorge raised an eyebrow.
“Scoots is like a sister to me.” Dash shrugged. “While I am teaching her everything I know, it’s not the same as teaching someone else.”
“I see…”
“By the way, Shadow.” Dash thought of something. “While you are my friend and all, it’s still going to cost you for flying lessons so advanced.”
“I’ll soundproof your room so no one can hear you screaming at night.”
Dash’s face immediately turned a bright shade of red, as well as her eyes going completely wide-eyed. Jorge, on the other hand, forced a cough, and looked at the flushed mare as she stood still.
“Dash?” Jorge kneeled over to the mare. “You alright?”
“Uh…Y-Yeah.” Dash shook her head, snapping out of her shocked state. “Yeah, yeah. I’m fine. That, just, uh, surprised me…”
“So, is it a deal, then?” Shadow asked.
“H-How do you plan on soundproofing our room, anyway?” Jorge thought aloud.
“Just because I’m a stallion now doesn’t mean I don’t remember things from my human days.”
“You do realize there’s probably a spell that sound proofs things, right?”
“Maybe…”
Dash slowly shrugged it off, and walked up to the flying stallion, who landed on the ground as she made her way to him. “Then. It looks like you got yourself a deal, Shadow.” She shook his hoof.
Jorge shrugged at a new thought. “I’m gonna have the hardest time adjusting to Shadow being a pony…”
Author's Note
The brilliant art in this chapter was brought to you by: Daszkin (https://www.fimfiction.net/user/Daszkin).
<3

//-------------------------------------------------------//
           Chapter 2-9.5: The Bonus Mini-Chapter           
//-------------------------------------------------------//
Chapter 2-9.5: The Bonus Mini-Chapter
Ish returned to the castle, still in his pony form. Now that he had finished what he had to, he wanted to go back to being a human. The more he stayed in this awkward body, the more he wanted to turn back to a human and regain the use of his appendable thumbs.
“Yo, Twibright!” He yelled out. “I wanna go back to being a fucking human, now!”
Walking back into the room, he stumbled across a pony he’d never met before, and a stallion nevertheless.
“...The fuck is this guy?” Ish pointed at the newbie.
“Ish, you idiot. It’s me.” Shadow sighed.
“Shadow?” Ish raised an eyebrow. “Is that really you? Holy shit, you look less Canadian… I didn’t think that was possible!”
Shadow simply rolled his eyes.
“Alright, alright.” Twilight cut in. “Let me just get this over with so you can do… whatever it is you do.”
“‘Kay, good.”
As Twilight’s horn began to glow, preparing the incoming beam to be shot at him. Jorge and Dash simply sat together in the couch, watching as the bright light began to emit from him once more.
“I just remembered… you still haven’t done your part of the bet.” Dash spoke softly.
“I half-forgot, what with the whole ‘Tirek’ thing, being in the hospital…”
“Well, now that you’re all fine and dandy…” Dash chuckled at the thought. “I hope you’re ready to eat your shoe…”
“I hate how you love screwing with me so much...” Jorge grumbled, looking back at the now human Ishtaba.
“Hey… Dash?”
“Hm?”
“I think I have an idea…”
“‘Aight. Now that I’m back in this body, I’mma go back to my apartment and do some stuffs.” Ish nodded, turning around to leave.
“Hold on a sec, Ish.”
Immediately, Ish stopped in his tracks, and turned around once more. “Yo.”
“Remember that favor you owed me back a couple of months ago?”
“Yeah…?”
“‘Kay, well. I’m cashing it in.” Jorge smirked softly.
“‘Aight.” Ish shrugged. “The hell you want?”
“I need you to eat your shoe.”
In an instant, Shadow knew where this was going, and Dash quickly placed her hooves on her mouth, muffling her laughter.
“...Uh. Say that again?”
“I need you.” Jorge paused. “To eat. Your shoe.”
“‘Kay, that’s what I thought you said…” Ish slowly nodded. “Let me respond to that with a big, fat, ‘NO. BITCH.’”
“‘Kay.” Jorge crossed his arms. “It’s either that. Or you gotta suck Shadow’s—”
“EATING MY SHOE IT IS. THEN.” Ish interjected, immediately pulling off his shoe. Only to find something on the bottom of it.
“...Shiiiiit. I stepped in shit before I got here…” Ish dropped the shoe, and grabbed the other one. “SHIT WHAT THE FUCK!?” He shouted in anger. “HOW THE FUCK DID I GET SHIT ON BOTH OF MY SHOES!?”
“That sucks, bro.” Jorge laid back further onto the couch. “I hope you like the taste of crap, then…”
“FUCK YOU JORGE.” Ish pointed at the cocky human. “FUCK. YOU.”
He then looked back at his shoe, trying to find a way to escape from this situation. If he ran, he’d most likely get caught in the end. If he simply refused, Jorge would probably have Twilight cast a spell on him to force him to do it. He simply couldn’t find a way out.
“Don’t even think of running. “ Shadow spoke up, “Dash can catch you.”
He looked up to the grinning Canadian pony, then back to his shoe once more.
“FUUUUUUUUUUUUCK!”
Author's Note
A little treat. :3

//-------------------------------------------------------//
            Chapter 2-10: One Year Later (Pt.1)            
//-------------------------------------------------------//
Chapter 2-10: One Year Later (Pt.1)
"So Jorge, you know that party Pinkie is having tonight?" Shadow spoke.
“Eh, Dash said she was gonna go, but I’m not really a party person…” Jorge shrugged.
"Well, I was going to go with Twi to the party..."
“Okay.. and?
"Well... Want to make it like a double date or something?"
“It’s just a party to celebrate having been only one year since you and Ish arrived.” Jorge rolled his eyes. “Pinkie’ll throw a party for just about anything, really. Oh, someone new moving to Ponyville? Let’s partayyyyy!” He scoffed. “After a while, it gets pretty annoying. For me, at least.”
"I think you should take Dash to the party." Shadow retorted, "Not just let her go on her own. I think she would appreciate you going with her."
“You’re not wrong there…” Jorge sighed. “Dash has started to get a little bit pissed at me…”
"Why's that?"
“Remember how you and Ish turned pony? Well, just you, Ish turned back, but, still.”
"Yeah I remember, how could I not?"
“Well. At first, Dash was chill about it. But over time, she’s been growing impatient.” Jorge rolled his eyes again. “You know how she is. Likes to be fast with nearly everything. Relationships included.”
"Yeah, I know. She was damn fast with those flying lessons, but damn am I a fast flyer now..."
Jorge chuckled. “Yeah, well. Every now and then she’s been throwing hints at me. About marriage.” He scratched the back of his neck. “I figured out why she wanted me to turn pony, too.”
“Speaking of marriage… I've been thinking about that too..." Shadow scratched the back of his neck also.
“Oh?” Jorge raised an eyebrow. “Twilight’s been bugging you, too?”
"Well, keep this quiet. For now."
“Keep what quiet?”
"The whole ‘marriage’ thing..."
“Oh.” Jorge nodded. “Yeah. I haven’t planned anything yet for Dashie, anyway. But I’ve been catching a lot of those hints more and more often. It’s gonna happen soon, I just don’t know when, or how…”
"Yeah. So about the party... You’re gonna go now. Right?"
“If I wanna keep her distracted from the whole marriage thing, yeah.” Jorge reluctantly nodded. “Did you know she wants to start a family, later on?”
"Yeah, actually. Twilight mentioned it to me a long time ago."
Jorge lowered his head, resting his hands on his hair. “I get that she wants to start a family, and the only way to do it is to use the spell on me, but…” He began pulling on it. “Damn. I don’t think I could see myself as a dad. Like, the hell, man?”
"You'll figure out what you can and cannot see as it happens, bro." Shadow replied as he reached up and patted his friend’s back.
Jorge looked up to look at his friend, which only caused him to chuckle at the sight. “Y’know, I still can’t get over the fact you’re a pony, now…”
"Well... I only did it because I wanted to fit in more and be able to fly. Well... That and I thought it would make Twilight happy too."
“To be fair, you didn’t know whether you’d end up as a pegasus or not. It’s kinda random chance...”
"True..." Shadow agreed, “But had a gut feeling I’d be a pegasus, anyway.”
“Really?” Jorge raised an eyebrow, placing a thinking hand on his chin. “I wonder if that had any effect on the spell…”
“That and I was kinda hoping to be a pegasus too. So I could catch Dash if you ever needed her for something.” Shadow replied while smiling.
“I could’ve always asked Fluttershy… Or even Twilight. Since, y’know, they both have wings…”
“Yeah, but can either of them fly as fast as Dash?”
“You can’t.” Jorge crossed his arms. “You may know her tricks and crap. And you may have learned how to fly better. But that doesn’t necessarily mean you’re as fast as she is…”
“Wanna make this a bet, then?”
“Sure. If I win. Ish eats his shoe. If you win. Ish eats his shoe.” Jorge grinned wildly.
“Shit. We have been using Ish as the one who does all the dumb shit for bets the past year, haven’t we?” Shadow asked curiously.
“Yep.” Jorge nodded. “I think he’s used to it already.”
“Yep, probably. Well, should we go pick up Dash and Twi and head to the party then?” Shadow asked glancing at a clock.
“I guess so.” Jorge replied.
“So… Jorge coming with you to the party?” queried Twilight.
“Nah.” Dash shook her head. “I asked him if he wanted to, but he said no.”
"Oh... Well, Shadow should be here soon. He's 'taking' me to the party."
“What do you mean ‘taking’ you?” Dash cocked her head. “Why did you say it like that?”
"As in like a date." Twilight replied. "He thought it would be a good place to take me on a date. And well... For him to learn how to dance as a pony."
“Oh?” Dash raised an eyebrow. “Good for you, Twilight!” She sighed softly. “If only Jorge would take the hint, already…”
"I think he's seen the hints Dash, maybe he's just not ready yet. Or... scared..." Twilight blinked.
“Scared of what, Twilight?” Dash raised her voice. “We’ve been together for two years, now! What could he possibly be scared of?”
Twilight glared at the frustrated mare, raising an eyebrow.
“...What?”
Twilight rolled her eyes. “Don’t you think maybe he’s just not ready? I mean, who knows what could be going on in that man’s mind.” She sighed softly. “Maybe he’s scared that things will be different once you two are married.”
“Why would he think that?”
“Dash, you want him to make a commitment.” Twilight reminded her. “You want to start a family, for Celestia’s sake! Don’t you think you’re scaring him off by trying to rush him?”
“N-No…” Dash hesitantly shook her head. “I’m not scaring him off!”
“Then stop trying to rush him!” Twilight demanded. “He’s proven to you time and time again that he’s not gonna leave you. So why are you in such a rush to get married?”
“C-Cause…” Dash whimpered. “Lately, If I don’t push him, he’ll never do it on his own… He always so shy about everything, and I have to be the one to snap him out of it.”
“But he should be a little more comfortable with it later on, just give him time and patien—”
"Twily... You ready?" Shadow spoke softly, walking through the door with his new tuxedo. "Oh. Hey Dash."
“‘Twily’?” Dash chortled.
“What? It’s Shadow’s little nickname for me…” Twilight huffed. “I thought it was cute.”
“It is. I just wasn’t expecting ‘Twily’”
“Like ‘Dashie’ isn’t the same?”
“...Point taken.”
"Oh... Um, there is someone in the hall who wants to talk to you, Dash." Shadow spoke up.
“Huh?” Dash turned her head to the hall, finding no one in sight. She looked back at Shadow, who simply nodded, signaling her to go see who it was. Even though, deep down, she had a small feeling of who it could’ve been.
Dash slowly walked off, leaving Shadow and Twilight alone by the exit.
“...You know, Twilight. You look amazing in that dress.” Shadow smirked.
“Really?” Twilight looked at the dress she wore. “It’s my old dress I wore back a few years ago in the Grand Galloping Gala.”
“Still looks amazing on you, though...”
Meanwhile, as Dash made her venture into the hallway, she began walking straight ahead, looking around for the supposed someone who wanted to talk to her, yet, no avail.
“I didn’t know you were going in your old Gala dress…”
Dash immediately jumped, turning around to find the familiar human.
“Jorge?” She sighed a breath of relief. “You scared the crap out of me… What are you doing over here, anyway?”
Jorge simply waved his hands up and down, getting Rainbow to notice the tuxedo he was wearing. “I wanted to surprise you.” He smiled softly, walking up to the prismatic mare. “I’m not much of a party person… But, I figured I’d go with you, anyway…”
“R-Really?” Dash gawked in awe, blushing slightly at the human’s actions.
As soon as he got close enough, he kneeled over, now able to see her face-to-face. “Mhm.” He hummed softly, softly placing his hand on her chin, holding her head up. “I haven’t really been the boyfriend I should have been these past several months… So I’m gonna make up for that.”
“Wha—” Dash was immediately cut off, as her human pressed his lips against hers. Her face slowly was painted in a bright shade of red, her wings quickly unraveled open stiff. Not wanting to let him do all the work, she shut her eyes, and pushed back with everything she had, throwing her hooves around his neck. While her boyfriend simply continued with his task, as well as wrapping his arms around her waist, pulling her closer to him.
Twilight poked her head through the hallway. “Dash, we’re gonna miss th—Oh...”
“What?” Shadow poked his head, as well. “What’s going o—” Shadow stopped himself from talking any further, not wanting to interrupt the two. “GG, Jorge…” He muttered to himself.
The two lovers slowly pulled back, still holding each other. They open their eyes, and looked at the other’s eyes, simply mesmerized by their significant other.
Soon enough, Jorge was the one to speak up, first. “You know I love you, right?”
“Mhm.” Dash hummed with a nod. “You never stop telling me…”
“Would you like me to stop?”
“No.” Dash tightened her grip on him. “Don’t ever stop being my sappy little human. Alright?”
“Of course, Dashie.” Jorge leaned in for a quick peck. “For you, I’ll do anything.”
Shadow and Twilight immediately pulled their heads away from the hall, returning back to the door.
Dash giggled. “Well, right now, we need to go to the party.”
“Then, what are we waiting for?”
“Twilight! Shadie!” Pinkie cheered. “It’s about time you got here! After all, it is Ishie and Shadie’s party!”
Shadow simply sighed at his nickname, despite having been a year since she started calling him that. “Why is it I have a nickname, and Twilight doesn’t?”
“It fits better on you, Shadie!”
“‘Course it does…”
“Y’know, Pinkie…” Twilight spoke up. “I think this is the first time you’ve thrown a party so… formal.”
“I know, right!?” Pinkie bounced with glee. “A certain somepony asked me to throw the party formal style, ‘cause he had the perfect outfit for the occasion! So I decided, why not?”
“A certain somepony, eh?” Shadow thought aloud. “And I assume you won’t be telling us who this certain somepony is?”
“Nope!” Pinkie replied sharply. “He said he wanted to keep it a surprise!”
“Well, it’s a ‘he’, so that sums it up to half of Ponyville’s population.” Shadow thought. “I guess we’ll find out whenever he arrives, if he hasn’t already.”
Shortly after Shadow and Twilight continued inside, Dash and Jorge followed suit, only to be interrupted by Pinkie’s greeting.
“Dashie! And…” At the sight of the human, she gasped. “Jorgie! I thought you weren’t gonna make it!”
“Dammit.” Jorge muttered under his breath. “You always find some way of making some nickname out of anyone’s name, don’t you, Pinkie?”
“You know it!” Pinkie giggled. “It fits so well on you, Jorgie!”
“Not surprised.” Jorge rolled his eyes. “Better than Goddy, I guess...”
“That’s the spirit!” Pinkie beamed, running right behind the duo, pushing them further inside. “Now get on over there, and enjoy the party!”
Jorge looked at his marefriend. “Geez. I show up at one of her parties for once and then she literally forces me inside right before I have the chance to leave.”
Dash chuckled. “It’s not very often that you show up at a party, Jorgie.”
Jorge scratched the back of his head. “Fair enough...”
Suddenly, the doors were thrown open. Everypony and Jorge jerked their heads, only able to see a shadowy figure of a human. At the sight of the figure, the majority of the ponies immediately shrugged, and continued what they were doing, and others simply continued to stare.
“WHAT’S UP BITCHEEEEEEEEES?” Ish shouted, startling everypony in the party. He stepped into the area with a fabulous attitude, wearing only a collared shirt and shorts.
“God dammit.” Shadow sighed. “Of course Ish would pull off something this stupid…”
“Even I don’t pull off that level of stupid anymore!” Jorge added, crossing his arms.
"What!? But these are my best fancy clothes!" replied Ish as he crossed his arms.
"What's with all this formality Ish?" Shadow queried, seeming surprised.
"Well, I figured seeing this is our party, I figured we should make it all classy and shit. Just like me!"
“You? Classy?” Jorge joined in. “No offence, Ish. But you’re anything but fancy…”
Suddenly, Ish started searching for something in his pockets. “Oh no.”
“What?” Shadow raised an eyebrow. “What’d you lose now?”
“My fucks.” Ish bluntly replied. “They’ve gone missing…”
Jorge scoffed, rolling his eyes as he returned to focusing on the party.
“Are you sure you don’t have… fancier clothes?” Shadow cocked his head. “Cause, uh. Those look more like casual clothes.”
“Well, ‘Marshmellow’ made this piece of shit tuxed—”
“And you couldn’t have worn that?” Shadow interrupted.
“Hell no.” Ish shook his head. “Do you know how uncomfortable that shit was?”
“I’m wearing one.” Jorge added, never bothering to turn around as he continued to watch the party. “Perfectly fine for me.”
“No one cares Jorge.” Ish retorted.
Jorge shrugged. “Well, Pinkie’s about to speak up in a about a minute.”
“You wanna go around this party looking like a complete idiot?” Shadow raised an eyebrow. “Be my guest, I’m not in the mood to be dealing with your idiocy. Especially in the middle of our party.”
Ish laughed softly at the ‘insult’ that was thrown at him. “It’s impossible for me to look like an idiot, Shadow.” He crossed his arms. “In case you’ve forgotten, I’m fucking fabulous.”
"Fucking fabulous at being a idiot." Shadow snickered.
“Fuck you too.” Ish grumbled.
“Now that everypony’s here…” Pinkie spoke up. “I’d just like to remind everypony that it’s been a whole year since Shadie and Ishie came to Ponyville! They’ve been such good friends, that I thought I’d give them their own special party, just like Goddy’s party last year!”
“Haven’t we already gone over my name not being ‘Shadie’?” Shadow raised an eyebrow. “Also… ‘Goddy’? When the fuck did he change his name back to Godson?”
“I didn’t?” Jorge tilted his head to the side. “I guess there’s still ponies who know me as Godson…” He scratched the back of his neck. “I mean… it’s been a year… I would’ve thought that everyone got the whole ‘Jorge’ news…”
“So before we continue with the party, give ‘em a round of applause!” Pinkie cheered, joining the crowd as they softly stomped on the floor.
“You always wanted to know how ponies clap, Ish?” Jorge looked to the asian. “There you go.”
“The fuck?” Ish gawked at the sight before him. “Why the fuck are they stomping on the ground? That’s not clap—”
Suddenly, Ish was given a blow to the head, knocking him out. Everypony stopped with wide-eyes to see the asian fall down to the floor, landing face first. They then look up to Shadow, standing on his rear legs with his right foreleg extended.
Shadow blinked. "What? He was getting on my nerves."
And then, at the sight of knowing it was a friend who knocked him out, and knowing it was Ishtaba who was knocked out. Everypony simply shrugged, and returned to what they were originally doing.
“Well… That just happened.” Jorge blinked, pausing for a moment as he tried to find a way to end the now awkward moment. “So uh…” He looked down to the unconscious asian. “What do we do with him?”
“Kill it with fire?” Dash cut in, only for the human and stallion to narrow their eyes at the mare. “...Kidding. Obviously.”
“I say we just drag him out of the place. Maybe lock him in one of the rooms back in the castle until the party’s over...” Shadow prepared to grab the body. “Sound good?”
“Nah. He’d destroy whatever’s in that room just to get out.” Jorge shook his head. “Just throw him in some bushes or something, when he wakes up and comes back before the party’s over, we’ll just knock him out again.”
"Twilight could cast a protection spell. Buuut... I like the idea of knocking him out multiple times."
“Speaking of Twilight…” Jorge muttered. “Incoming, 6 o’clock.”
Shadow immediately turned around, finding an angry Twilight trotting her way to him.
“Twily…!” He smiled sheepishly. “What’s the matter? You look ups—”
“What kind of friend knocks out another friend like that?” Twilight asked, her eyes narrowing slightly as she finally got face-to-face with the stallion, and began staring at his eyes.
Seconds later, still looking at Shadow’s eyes, she spoke. “Jorge. Put your hand down.”
Dash looked up at her boyfriend, noticing his arm was raised. The human quickly reacted, however, and slowly brought his hand back down.
“To be fair, Twilight… It’s Ishtaba.” Shadow pointed out. “Someone was bound to knock him out… It just… uh… happened to be me…”
“He’s still your friend, Shadow!” Twilight countered. “Just because it’s Ishtaba doesn’t mean—" Twilight was suddenly cut off as Shadow just full out kissed her.
"I'm sorry I knocked him out, but he was disrupting everyone."
Twilight sighed softly. “Even so, you could’ve done something other than…Jorge? What are you doing?”
Jorge looked up at the alicorn. “I’m dragging Ish’s body… What does it look like I’m doing?”
Twilight shook her head, returning back to the topic. “Look, my point is, friends don’t knock each other out. How’d you like it if Rainbow Dash knocked you out?”
“I’d be fine with it… she wouldn't do so without a valid reason."
“Twilight...” Jorge spoke up from the entrance of the building, still dragging Ish by his feet. “I get you’re the Princess of Friendship and all, but we’ve known Ish way before the three of us fell in Equestria. He’s been asking for this for five years, now.”
“I…” Twilight tried to speak, though found no words to counter nor reply with. “...Fair enough. I guess.”
Jorge nudged his head in Shadow’s direction. “Yo, Canada-fag. Help me carry Ish’s body out of here.”
Shadow nodded, walking off in the human’s direction.
Meanwhile, Twilight watched as the two carried the asian out of the building. She laughed softly at their efforts of trying to ditch the obnoxious human. Remembering all the times she tried to make him go away.
Then, her laughter increased as she watched through the glass doors as the two threw Ish into a nearby bush.
Author's Note
Wooo, another two parterrrr!

//-------------------------------------------------------//
            Chapter 2-11: One Year Later (Pt.2)            
//-------------------------------------------------------//
Chapter 2-11: One Year Later (Pt.2)
The doors bust wide open, causing everypony to jerk their heads towards the return of shadowy figure of a human. At the same time, everypony also heard the sound of stepping speedily rushing towards the door.
“WHY THE FUCK WAS I LYING IN A B—” In an instant, Ish found himself unconscious once again. A few of the party members looked towards Twilight, finding Shadow standing next to her, then looked towards Rainbow Dash, finding Jorge nowhere near her.
“That should hold him for another hour or so…” Jorge shook his fist with a growl.
Unsurprisingly, in a matter of seconds, Shadow bursts into a complete foolish state of laughter, even going as far as falling down due to how much he laughed.
His date, however, simply raised an eyebrow over his unnecessarily hard laughter.
With a roll of her eyes, she groaned. “Of course you’d be laughing.” Before she could say anything else, she was immediately cut off by a new sound. She looked towards the sound, only to find its source to be Rainbow Dash, who was also laughing along with Shadow. Albeit, not as hard as Shadow’s laughter was, but was still a noticeable laugh regardless.
“I’m surrounded by idiots…” Twilight’s hoof met her face.
During the complete foolish laughter from Shadow and Rainbow Dash, Jorge took this moment to flee the scene, as well as dumping Ish’s body near the bush once more. Once he had returned, he noticed the two laughing, as well as Twilight giving him the stink eye.
“Let’s see. My choices are: take Twilight’s wrath like a man, or run.” He thought to himself.
“Jorge…” Twilight growled.
“Or option three… I like option three.”
Jorge casually ignored Twilight for just a moment, and ran off to Applejack, who was simply minding her own business.
“Yo, AJ.” He spoke up. “Mind if, uh, I borrow your rope?”
Applejack turned her head around to face the human. “Uh… Why?”
“Oh. Cause. Uh…” He scratched the back of his neck. “I kinda need it for ‘Step 2’ of my plan.”
“Step 2?” Applejack tilted her head. “You’re seriously not trying t—”
“No, AJ. If I wanted to take over Equestria again, I would’ve just followed my original seven steps.” Jorge crossed his arms. “Then again, they probably wouldn’t work anymore. But that’s beside the point.”
“...Fine.”
“”Kay, thanks.”
As Applejack hoofed the rope over to him, he quickly grabbed a hold of it, and ran back out.
“...What do you think he’s going to do with your rope, AJ?” Fluttershy asked timidly.
“‘Ah dunno.” Applejack shook her head. “But knowing him, it can’t be that bad.”
Jorge casually walked back in, rope no longer in his possession.
“...Please tell me it can’t be that bad…” Applejack muttered to herself.
“And now that that’s over…” Jorge sighed a breath of relief, returning to his marefriend, whose laughter had finally dimmed down to small random chuckles.
“What’d you do with AJ’s rope, Jorge?” Shadow asked curiously.
Jorge shrugged. “Oh. Just Step 2, that’s all.”
“Step 2?”
Jorge nodded. “Yeah. Step 1: Knock Ish out. Step 2: Tie him up so he can’t get up. Step 3: Profit.” He placed a thinking hand on his chin. “I’ll admit, it’s a lot shorter than my whole ‘take over Equestria’ fiasco, considering that took a whole seven steps just to accomplish.”
“Don’t you still have those pictures?”
“Probably.” Jorge grabbed his phone from it’s home. “I had to delete most of my internet required apps, like, Facebook, and stuff to make up room for more pictures. It’s funny, cause I never used most of these apps anyway.”
“Really?” Shadow cocked his head to the side. “Lemme see…”
“Wha—” Before Jorge can even process the moment, he instantly found his phone no longer in his possession, and in Shadow’s instead.
“Ooh, what’s this folder?”
“NO SHADOW DON’T…!”
“NOPE NEVERMIND I TAKE IT BACK I DON’T WANNA KNOW ANYMORE!”
“SHADOW WHAT DID YOU FIND?”
Shadow tossed the phone back at Jorge. “NOPE NOTHING FORGET IT I TAKE IT ALL BACK.”
Jorge looked down at his phone. Noticing Shadow hadn’t even made it all the way to the folder. In fact, he hadn’t even escaped the home screen.
“God dammit Jorge, your lock screen picture was fine. A little cute, maybe, but it was fine. It was just the two of you kissing.” Shadow shivered. “BUT THAT WALLPAPER’S GOTTA GO.”
“Huh?” Jorge raised an eyebrow. “What’s so bad about my wallpap—k yeah I see what you mean, now.”
“What is it?” Dash walked closer to the screen, only for it to instantly turn black.
“Nope, nothing. I’ll uh. I’ll change it later.” Jorge quickly placed his phone back in his pocket. “...When no one’s looking.”
“Jorge…? What was your wallpaper?”
“Hm? Nothing. Don’t worry about it.” He quickly grabbed a hold of his marefriend, pulling her into a quick kiss. “Did I ever tell you how much I love you?”
“Don’t dodge the subject, Jorge…”
Twilight and Shadow immediately looked at each other, then back at the other couple, then back at each other. They both shared a nod, and looked back to the couple.
“We’re uh.. gonna go find…” Shadow stammered.
“Uh…” Twilight attempted to finish the sentence. “A… thing! Yeah!”
“Yeah!” Shadow quickly nodded. “Some… thing… that we need to go get… that’s… not here. ‘Kay bye.”
“Wait!” Jorge shouted. “Shadow! You don’t wanna see any more pic—”
“Lemme think about this for a sec… FUCK NO!”
“SCREW THIS.” Jorge immediately shifted into ‘Plan B.’ “I’M RUNNING!”
Before he can even turn around, Dash grabbed a hold of his tuxedo, and pulled him down to the floor, pinning him down so he couldn’t escape.
“Jorge… You know I love you, right?” Dash smirked evilly..
“Mhm…” Jorge nodded nervously.
“And I know you love me, right?”
“Mhm…” Jorge nervously nodded again.
“So then, if you really love me… You’re gonna let me see what you did to your phone…” Dash moved her face closer to his.
“And if you really want to keep me alive… You’ll forget this ever happened...” Jorge countered.
“Hm… Let me think about it…” Dash placed a thinking hoof on her chin. Pausing for a moment before she assaulted his lips with her own.
While he was distracted by her kiss attack, she was able to sneak a hoof into his pocket and take his phone from what used to be it’s home. Now that she had it in her possession, she quickly jumped off the human, and used her wings to fly up high enough to where her boyfriend couldn’t reach her.
“N-No! Dash! Wait!”
“Rekt,” snickered Shadow, “Outsmarted by your girlyfriend again I see, eh Jorge?”
Dash used the little knowledge she learned when she watched him use the phone. She turned on the phone, meeting the picture used for his lockscreen. Exactly what Shadow had said, it was a simple picture of the two kissing.
Shadow flew up to Dash, close enough to be able to whisper in her ear, “Password is ‘Muh Waifu’”
“Right.” Dash nodded. “You might, uh… wanna look away…”
“Yeah. Not in the mood to see that stuff...again...” Shadow replied as he stopped flying and dropped down beside Twilight.
As Dash finally made her way to the home screen, she was finally able to see what had scarred Shadow, and what Jorge was trying so hard to hide.
“...Y’know. I’m not surprised Jorge would put this as his wallpaper.”
“I mean, dat ash of yours is pretty great Dash, not that I would know or anything...But Twi’s is better…” Shadow casually spoke. Trying as hard as possible not to look at his enraged marefriend.
“Right. So, you’re changing this, Jorge.” Dash narrowed her eyes at her boyfriend, who was still laying down, completely afraid to get up. “Like, right now.”
“Y-You’re not mad?” Jorge raised an eyebrow.
“Eh.” Dash slowly stopped using her wings, landing back down onto the floor next to her boyfriend. “I’m mad you left your password so easy for Shadow to get in. But at the same time, I’m not too surprised you’d pull a move like this anyway. Just… don’t pull something this dumb again.”
The two were then suddenly blinded by a huge flash of light. Once it had died out, Dash immediately jerked her head towards the source.
“I… can’t say the same thing for Twilight, though…”
Jorge slowly got up, and looked at Twilight and Shadow, and was left completely wide-eyed at the sight.
One of them was lying on the ground, unconscious.
Twilight looked up at the dumbfounded human, and raised an eyebrow.
“Is there any room left in that bush you threw Ish in?”
“No! Don’t use that picture!”
“Why not?”
“Do you want Shadow to see my ass again!?”
Jorge scoffed. “As if he already hasn’t sneaked a peek before…”
Dash paused to think about what she just heard, then blushed slightly. “You don’t think he actually has sneaked a peek...do you?”
“...Well. I know I have.”
“Of course you have. We’re dating. I expect you to do those types of things.” Dash giggled. “But, that’d be so...weird...if Shadow ever did.”
“He’s got Twilight’s ass to stare at. If I catch him staring at yours, he’s dead.” Jorge looked over to the aforementioned stallion’s unconscious body.
Dash leaned against her boyfriend. “No offence, Jorge. But if I can pin you down with little effort, Shadow could take you down in a good five seconds…”
Jorge wrapped an arm around her. “You know I let you, right?”
“Oh?” Dash raised an eyebrow. “You let me pin you down?”
Jorge nodded with a smug grin. “I could totally take you down. After all, I am the one who’s always on top.”
“Do I smell a challenge, Jorge?” Dash mimicked her cocky boyfriend’s smug grin.
“It’s not a challenge if there’s no chances of winning.”
“That’s it!”
Several minutes later, Shadow slowly rubbed his head, and groaned as he opened his eyes. He looked to his right, only to see Ish’s unconscious body, tied up with Applejack’s rope. He raised an eyebrow at the sight, only to have his thoughts interrupted by the sounds of nearby grass rustling, and the moans of two familiar friends.
“Do I wanna even get up and see what’s going on…?” Shadow thought to himself, waiting a moment before making his decision.
He slowly lifted his head up from the bush he was dumped in, looking for the source of the sound. After enough searching, he found the human/pony couple doing what looked like a mix of wrestling, and heavily making out, with Dash being on top.
“...Are you two about to start having sex? Do I need to grab the camera?”
Both Dash and Jorge’s eyes shot wide open, they pulled back, and looked over to the now conscious stallion.
“How long…” Jorge spoke.
“Have you been watching…?” Dash finished for him.
“Not too long…” Shadow slowly shook his head. “I have a fucking massive headache though, did someone try to implode my head or something?”
The couple looked at each other, then back at the confuzzled stallion.
“Uh. Yeah.” Jorge nodded softly. “After you made that comment about my marefriend’s ass… Twilight kinda… knocked you out using some spell…”
“And why are you two making out… outside?” Shadow curiously asked.
“Well…” Jorge began. “We were originally figuring out what picture to set in my wallpaper while we waited for you to wake up…”
“And then uh…” Dash smiled sheepishly. “Things kinda got heated between us…”
“I see…” Shadow nodded. “‘Kay. Uh. I’m glad I woke up before things went... south…” He stated with a nervous chuckle. “Well... I’m going to head back inside now...”
He quickly jumped out of the bush, and proceeded to walk back inside, in an attempt to return to the party before Jorge and Dash made their own ‘party’. He blindly made a run to the door, only to bump right into a certain ‘Princess of Friendship’.
He stepped back just a bit, and smiled. “Twiliy! H-Heyyy~! I was just about to head back to the party. Wanna tag along with me?”
Right as he tried to make his way past her, she quickly stretches a foreleg out, blocking him from his path.
“Partytime’s over, Shadow.” Twilight monotoned.
“Oh. Okay.” Shadow stepped back from her foreleg. “So then I guess we’re going back home?”
Twilight simply nodded.
“Okay, cool.” Shadow leaned his face closer to hers. “Maybe we could… watch a movie or something before bed?” He smiled innocently. “Maybe even snuggle a little bit…?”
As the stallion tried to lean in closer for a kiss, Twilight immediately blocked his path with a hoof.
“After that little ‘joke’?” Twilight raised an eyebrow. “Yeah… I don’t think so.”
“B-But it was just a ‘dat ass’ joke!”
”Oooh. Shadow’s in the doghouse, now!”
”Shut up, Jorge. Or you’ll wind up in the doghouse!”
Twilight’s horn lit up in a purple glow, seconds later, a glowing purple aura surrounded Shadow’s ear.
“Twily…? That’s my ear…” Shadow pointed out nervously.
“I know.” Twilight deadpanned, slowly making her way back to the castle. “Let’s go, Shadow…” She then pulled his ear, dragging him along with her.
“Owwwwww!” Shadow hissed in pain, struggling to keep up with her pulling. “I would’ve followed you without having to pull my earrrrr!”
“I’m fully aware of that!”
Author's Note
End of two parter, m8s.
We now return to your regularly scheduled program.

//-------------------------------------------------------//
Chapter 2-12: One Couple's Anniversary, Another Couple's Feud...
//-------------------------------------------------------//
Chapter 2-12: One Couple's Anniversary, Another Couple's Feud...
Shadow slowly stirred around in bed, attempting to ignore the sunlight which peeked from the windows. As it attempted to burn through his eyelids, he countered by lifting his head up, grabbing the pillow from under his head, and bury his head in it.
Instead of helping, burying himself in his pillow made the problem worse, as he simply made himself more uncomfortable. He attempted to solve the problem once more, by turning around, and laying his head back on top of the pillow, where it belonged.
At that point, however, he was already awake, and his attempts to return back to dreamland were futile. The stallion gave up on his impossible quest to sleep, and slowly began to open his eyes.
At first, all he could see was a giant purple blurry blob. But as his vision quickly began to focus itself, he could eventually make out what that blurry blob was.
His marefriend, Twilight. Who was wide awake, and watching him sleep.
“Rrrright on time!” Twilight beamed.
“T-Twilight…?” Shadow rubbed his eye softly. “W-What are you doing awake so early?”
“It’s our anniversary, silly.” Twilight giggled. “I’ve already planned out the day just for the two of us!”
Shadow lifted a hoof towards his mouth as he groggily yawned. “You did?”
“Yep!” Twilight nodded. “I already showered and everything!”
“Of course you did…” Shadow chuckled. “How long have you been waiting?”
“Long enough!” Twilight jumped out of bed. “Alright, c’mon! We have the whole day ahead of us, and I don’t want to waste a single minute!”
“Fine…”
“Well, Shadow?” Twilight smiled softly. “What do you think about our little anniversary date?”
“It’s great, Twily.” Shadow smiled back. “A little quality time in the beach was exactly what we needed… Thanks...”
“Well, I still have a few things planned left, but that’s for later…” Twilight smirked softly.
“A ‘few things’, such as…?” Shadow raised an eyebrow.
Twilight giggled a bit over the stallion’s curiosity. “You’ll see.”
“C’mon, Twilight…” Shadow groaned. “You know I hate surprises… Can’t you at least just give me a hint?”
“Ennnope!” Twilight retorted. “You’ll find out as the day progresses, Shadow. That’s the point of a surprise.”
“Ugh.” Shadow rolled his eyes. “Fineeeee…”
Twilight softly laughed at the stallion’s whining. “Why are you so impatient over a few anniversary plans?”
“Because…” Shadow grabbed her hoof. “I’m too excited to see what my beautiful marefriend has in store for our amazing anniversary.”
https://camo.derpicdn.net/0bb3d735fd75733c0a19c810b7a1f66f88511830?url=https%3A%2F%2Flh6.googleusercontent.com%2Fa7ZnPFzXJpNBaAk-Lh0nElz5gW-8e4KuznXpUt91Lc5ty7THBQsjxvnyMayXRfTek2oEzkiT-iTpF8hDFZQ3IWR5DbbzRHyXrtLFM3HQzZNSAtbn-GCM-zqAv8XcaqnelQ
“Aww…” Twilight smiled with a blush for a moment, then her smile instantly died into a more serious look. “I’m still not telling you anything about our surprise.”
“Dammit...”
Shadow and Twilight smiled as they both made their way back to the castle, their tails wrapped around each other, and the two of them leaning on one another.
Meanwhile back at the castle…
“Remind me again why we’re throwing an anniversary party for Shadow and Twilight?” Ish asked, his arms crossed as he showed his unamusement.
“Uh, cause Pinkie’s the one throwing it?” Jorge raised an eyebrow. “You know how she is…”
Ish rolled his eyes. “Then why am I here?”
Jorge mimicked Ish’s eye roll. “Pinkie made you supervisor, remember?”
“What does that mean again…?”
“It means you just stand there and do nothing.”
“Can I shout at people?”
“That’s what supervisors normally do…”
“‘Kay cool.” Ish nodded, suddenly finding himself to have a smug grin.
Jorge simply shrugged off Ish’s actions, marking it off as another one of his retarded plans. Not wanting to even hear about his plans, he moves onward to see what his marefriend is up to.
“Wait! Jorge!”
As his ear twitched at the sudden exclamation, Jorge turned around to face the asian.
Ish’s smug grin grew wider. “You’re fired.”
“For?” Jorge tilted his head to the side.
“For being cuban.” Ish bluntly stated.
“You do realize supervisors have literally no power over anything except to yell at people if they’re doing something wrong, right?” Jorge raised an eyebrow.
“Fuck, this job is useless…”
Jorge shook his head, and turned back around to his path.
“JORGE YOU IDIOT!”
“What?” Jorge turned his head back.
“YOU’RE GOING THE WRONG WAY!”
Jorge simply rolled his eyes, and ignored the retarded asian.
“NO JORGE GET BACK HERE YOU SON OF A BITCH!”
As he made his way back to the throne room. He noticed his marefriend putting up a party banner, having it hang off the ceiling. Although with some major adjustments, since the ceiling was decently high up.
”JORGE YOU BITCH STOP IGNORING ME!”
“Hey Dashie!” Jorge called out to the mare. “How’s it going up there?”
“Well, I almost got the banner completely hung up!” Dash replied. “Not exactly easy trying to hang this up myself. Especially when the ceiling’s so high up…”
“If I had wings, I’d help out. But…”
“It’s still not too late to turn into a pony, Jorge.” Dash chuckled to herself.
“It’s not too late for a lot of things.” Jorge countered.
“You mean like maybe asking a certain question?” Dash glared at her human.
“In due time, my love, in due time…”
“I still don’t get why you won’t just man up and do it already…” Dash muttered to herself.
Pretending he hadn’t heard that last remark, he held back a sigh, and made his way out of the room.
Before he could finish his journey to the exit, however, Pinkie appeared out of nowhere, blocking his path in front of him.
“JORGE!”
The human simply reacted by stepping back, having gotten used to her constant appearing out of nowhere and scaring everyone to death. “What is it now, Pinkie?”
“There’s a bit of a teensy tiny problem…”
“And that is…?”
“Twilight and Shadow are on their way back to the castle…”
“What?” Jorge went wide-eyed. “I thought they were still on their date!?”
“Well, I can clearly see them getting closer out the window!”
“Shit…” Jorge cursed under his breath. “We need a distraction…”
“JORGE YOU FUCKING PIECE OF SHIT STOP IGNORING ME!”
In an instant, a lightbulb went out in both Jorge and Pinkie’s heads. They both shared a glare, and nodded at their newfound idea.
Ish ran up to the two, preparing to give Jorge the screaming of his life. With a large gasp for air, he quickly began. “I TOLD YOU TO STO—”
“Ish, we need your help.”
“SHUT UP WHEN I’M TALK—wait what?” Ish raised an eyebrow. “Does this mean I get a real job position?!”
“Yeah yeah, calm down…” Jorge shushed him. “Geez…”
“So what is it that you scrubs need help with?”
“We need you to distract Twilight and Shadow.”
“What?” Ish jerked his head back. “Hell no! I was expecting something easier than that!”
“I’ll pay you 1 bit if you do it.”
“...How long did you say you needed them away?”
As Shadow and Twilight got closer and closer to the castle, the closer they were getting on to Twilight’s next plan. The more Shadow tried to guess, the more he’d throw ideas that may not even happen into his head. Twilight herself even began to grow a little impatient, despite having the entire day planned out, she felt like she needed to hurry up and get started.
When they finally reach the door, Shadow, like a gentlecolt, reaches forward to open the door for his marefriend.
“SHADOW! YOU LITTLE CANADIAN GRAY PASTEL PIECE OF HORSE SHIT!”
Shadow slowly turned to face the asian, he replied calmly but somewhat annoyed. “Must you intrude on my day with my marefriend? Any other day is fine, but this day, no, fuck off.”
“Oh, right. Today’s your anniversary.” Ish stated dumbly. “Let me just…” He lifted a leg, making it seem as if he was getting ready to turn around. Instead, he slowly spun around, pausing briefly once his back faced the couple, then quickly turned back around. “Not care, you canadian bitch.”
Shadow simply sighed at the asian’s fruitless efforts to piss him off, he turned his head to look at his marefriend. “Twily could you hover him in the air and freeze him for a moment please?”
As soon as he saw Twilight’s horn beginning to glow, Ish instantly pulled an idea out of nowhere in a last ditch effort to keep them distracted.
“You’re gonna send your fucking horsewife to do your job?”
“Pretty much.” Shadow nodded, ignoring the ‘horsewife’ comment thrown at his marefriend.
Twilight simply rolled her eyes, grasping Ish’s entire body in her glowing purple aura, and practically throwing him up, then abruptly stopping a few feet in the air.
“PUT ME DOWN! I HAVE MY RIGHTS. AM I BEING DETAINED!? I HAVE THE RIGHT TO REMAIN SILENT! WHERE’S MY LAWYER!?”
Shadow flew up to be face to face with the asian, nearly touching him, and calmly replied in a low tone, “Do I have to have Royal Guards escort you to prison for the rest of the day or are you going to stop?”
“Uh. No thanks, I actually want to be free, thank you very much…”
“So you will stop?”
“Um…” Ish paused for a moment, thinking about how carefully he’ll choose his words.
“‘Um?’” Shadow raised an eyebrow. “That’s not a yes or no.”
“Are you gonna kiss me with your girl standing there watching?”
“I see how it is.” retorted Shadow as he folded his wings and dropped to the ground. “Twily, you can drop him now,” then turning to a suddenly passing Lyra, “I found your boyfriend, drag him home.”
“FUCK. You seriously didn’t just—” Before Ish could finish his sentence, he immediately began to follow the rules of gravity, and made a one-way trip down to the ground. Though instead of landing on the ground first, his head made contact into something else.
Jorge’s knee.
The minute the asian made contact with the ground, he was already unconscious.
“Huh?” Twilight shook her head, just now realizing the cuban standing where Ish stood. She didn’t even notice him walking by or anything.
Shadow’s ear twitched at Twilight’s sudden reaction, and he quickly turned his head around.
Unfortunately, halfway during his turn, Jorge used all the strength he had, and delivered the biggest blow to the head he could throw, hoping it was enough to knock him out.
Somehow, in a sheer stroke of luck, it was just enough to knock the tough stallion out. His whole body slumped to the side, landing a few centimeters away from where he originally stood.
“What are you doing!?” Twilight went completely wide-eyed, preparing to charge her horn for a spell.
Jorge merely grabbed his arm, groaned at the pain of a new cracked hand, thanks to Shadow’s thick skull, and glared at Twilight.
“Plan B.”
“Wha—” Before Twilight could process what was happen next, she was instantly blinded, and was instantly caught off guard by something heavy now riding her back.
“Can’t let you use any magic on him just yet, Twilight.” Dash rolled her eyes, using her wings to blindfold the alicorn. “Not when we’re working so hard on our project.”
“Dash!?” Twilight shouted, trying to shake off the pegasus mare. “Let go of me!”
Dash simply shook her head. “Really sorry about having to knock out your coltfriend. Really, I am.” She clicked her tongue. “But I had a feeling Ish wouldn’t last too long.”
“What are you talking about!?” Twilight opened her wings, preparing to fly in an attempt to drop the pegasus off of her. “Last too long doing what!?”
Dash stopped her wings midway with her hooves. “Nuh-uh, Twilight. No wings.”
Jorge shrugged at the alicorn’s attempts to shake off Rainbow Dash, then turned around to check on the unconscious asian. And, strangely, not finding his body where it originally stood.
He immediately looked around, and noticed his body was floating right next to Lyra, who was already several feet away.
“Shit…” Jorge muttered. “That wasn’t part of the plan…”
Knowing he’d have to think of something quickly, he turned around, grabbed one of Shadow’s hooves with his good arm, and began dragging him away.
“This plan better work, Dash…” Jorge thought. “If Shadow doesn’t kill me, then Twilight definitely will.”
A short time later, Twilight immediately realized something. Her horn began to glow once more, surrounding the pegasus in her purple aura.
Knowing what would happen next, Dash immediately let go of Twilight’s wings, and instead wrapped her hooves around the alicorn’s body, gripping it tightly in an attempt to make sure she wasn’t thrown off just yet.
It worked for a while, but Twilight’s magic kept getting stronger and stronger the longer she held on, eventually she was ripped off of the alicorn’s back, and swiftly thrown into the ground back-first.
“What the heck, Rainbow Dash!?” Twilight gawked in surprise. “What exactly were you trying to pull off!?”
“Phase One.” Dash deadpanned. “Phase Two starts…” She looked around, finding no trace of both Jorge and Shadow. “Hey, where’s Jorge and Shadow?”
Twilight raised an eyebrow, and looked over to where he originally stood. Only to find completely nothing there. She immediately looked around, unable to find the two anywhere.
“Where’d they go?” Twilight looked back down at Dash, a mix of anger and confusion appeared on her face.
Dash shrugged. “Beats me.”
Twilight looked at the mare, then back at her surroundings, with a groan, she simply ran off in a hunt after the human and her coltfriend.
“...now.” Dash muttered, completing her previously unfinished sentence.
Then, as if right on cue, Jorge slowly came from one of the sides of the castle, checking for Twilight’s presence, then quickly ran to his marefriend.
“You alright?” He asked gently, getting down on his knees.
“Eh. I’ve handled worse…” Dash shrugged. She noticed her boyfriend reach out his good arm, so she grabbed a hold of it, and slowly got up as he pulled her up. “How’s your hand?”
“Feels like absolute shit.” Jorge hissed at the pain quickly returning as soon as he remembered. “But I think I can manage…”
“Good…” Dash sighed a breath of relief. Then jabbed him in the arm. “What the hell were you thinking!? What if that punch wasn’t enough to knock him out!? You could’ve screwed up the entire plan!”
“You don’t think I didn’t know that?” Jorge raised an eyebrow, and began rubbing at the pain in an attempt to ease it away. “But sitting on top of him isn’t exactly the smartest idea ever, especially when I’m lighter than he is.”
Dash took a deep breath, then sighed. “Whatever, as long as you were able to do something to get him away from Twilight for a bit… What’d you do with him, anyway?”
“I kinda left him in that bush where Ish was a week ago.”
“Again?”
“What? It was as far as I could go without risking him waking up on me.”
“Fair enough.” Dash nodded. “Did Lyra take Ish?”
Jorge looked over to where Lyra was walking towards, unable to see her. “Yeah.” He groaned. “I’ll worry about him in a bit.” He looked back to his marefriend. “How long do you think they’ll be out there?”
“I wanna say ten, maybe fifteen minutes.” Dash placed a thinking hoof on her chin. “More or less, but it should be enough to keep them busy for the girls to put the finishing touches on everything.”
“Good…” Jorge sighed his own breath of relief. “Then I’m just gonna rest in one of the guest bedrooms in the castle…”
“I’ll join you. Somepony’s gotta help patch up that hand…”
“Thanks, Dashie…”
As Shadow made his way to the door, he groaned softly. “Once we get inside, I’m gonna need a bandage…”
“For what?” Twilight raised an eyebrow.
“My pride…”
Shadow opened the door, and stepped into the castle. He searched the room for a light switch, as the main hallway looked like it was dark enough for a bat to even live in.
As he found the light switch, he turned it on, and the entire hall was illuminated by the lights above. As expected, nothing was different from since they last left the castle for their date.
However, the more and more they got closer to the throne room, the more Shadow could hear soft sounds, almost like whispering.
“You heard that too, right?” Twilight asked.
Shadow nodded. “Should we check it out?”
“We’d be crazy not to…”
They both nodded in unison, and quickly made their way to the throne room.
Upon arriving, they both had noticed the lights were off in here as well. Though they were still able to make out some noticeable changes. However, they could only assume what they were until they turned the lights on.
Once they were on, everything was revealed. The two looked up to a banner that read “Happy Anniversary Twilight and Shadow!”, party balloons, a small table holding a decently size cake, and other party decorations.
Then they looked down, and saw Pinkie, sitting on her throne.
“Took ya two long enough.” She giggled.
“Pinkie…?” Twilight gawked in awe. “What’s all this?”
“It’s an anniversary party, duh!” Pinkie replied.
“Did you really think we wouldn’t have a celebration of our own, dear?” Rarity walked into the room, with the rest of their friends (excluding Dash and Jorge) following suit. “You really should’ve seen this coming…”
“Heh…” Twilight smiled sheepishly. “Guess I should’ve…”
“Wait, so…” Shadow spoke up. “If you four are here… Where’s Jorge and Dash?”
“They’re resting in one of the guest rooms…” Fluttershy replied. “Jorge thinks he cracked his hand, so Rainbow Dash went to help bandage it. They’re probably just relaxing in the room, now…”
“‘Relaxing’, right…” Shadow rolled his eyes, he then looked over to his marefriend, whom was still admiring all the party decorations around the room. “I’ll be right back, I need to go check something real quick…”
“Oh. Alright.” Twilight nodded. “Don’t be gone too long, we can’t have the party without you too, you know…”
Shadow chuckled softly. “Relax, I’ll be back before you know it.”
With a quick peck on the lips from his marefriend, Shadow exited the room, making his way towards Twilight's bedroom, which was also his.
Along the way, he noticed one of the doors in the hallway was cracked open slightly. Raising an eyebrow, he walked towards the open door, suddenly worrying if he was about to regret his choice.
He knocked on the door hard enough to be heard, but soft enough to avoid pushing the door open, and wondered if he would get a reaction, if there was even anyone in there.
To his surprise, he got no response. However, knowing that it could simply be Jorge and Dash staying quiet, he decided to poke his head through the door. As he surveyed the room, he saw the two lying in bed, the blankets covering them as they cuddled themselves to sleep.
He slowly walked up to the sleeping couple, and softly shook Jorge, waking up the human.
Jorge quietly groaned as the stallion shook him around. His eyes opened slowly, seeing only a blurry mess of colors. He blinked a few times, readjusting his eyesight, and began to realize the colors were formed in a rainbow.
“Jorge, wake up already…” Shadow said with a groan. “I don’t have all day, god dammit.”
Sighing deeply, the human turned his head, and fully got a glimpse of the familiar stallion.
“If you’re gonna punch me, just get it over with…” Jorge mumbled. “I may have already cracked my fist for punching your head anyway…”
“As much as I’d love to do that, I don’t have a lot of time to get back at you right now.” Shadow shook his head. “Expect it coming soon, though. Cause it’s gonna happen.”
“So then why wake me up…?”
“Cause I need your opinion on something I’m about to do.”
“Oh…?” Jorge raised an eyebrow, slowly escaping from the mare’s cuddly grasp, which only made things worse, as she only tightened her grip on him. He could hear her mutter something in her sleep, but failed to understand what it was. With a roll of his eyes, he simply held onto her, and sat up with her in his grasp, allowing her to maintain her own grip on him.
“What’s with the…”
“When you spend two years with her, you get used to it…” Jorge sighed. “It’s better to just let her wake up on her own.”
“Right…”
“So, what is it exactly you need my opinion on?”
Shadow blinked, almost forgetting why he came here in the first place, then shook his head as he remembered again seconds later. “Oh. Right. I’m gonna need you to follow me for a sec…”
Jorge looked down at the mare resting her head on his chest, then back to his friend. “Yeah, alright…”
Once Jorge was up, and still holding his mare in his arms, the two made their way to Twilight’s bedroom. Shadow immediately rushed to the closet, digging for something he had hidden.
“So, why are we in Twilight’s bedroom?” Jorge asked curiously.
“Just a second, Jorge.” Shadow monotoned. “God…”
After what felt like minutes of searching, Shadow finally found what he was searching for and appeared with a small velvety box.
“So, Shadow. You came out of the closet, eh?” Jorge teased.
“Shut up.” Shadow retorted. “You’re forgetting that I’m still gonna get you back for what you did earlier. You’re just gonna make it worse.”
“Right. Sorry.”
“Anyways…” Shadow rolled his eyes. “I was planning on showing this to her later tonight, but I think doing this now, in front of everyone—”
“Except Ish.”
“Fuck Ish. He’s probably trapped at Lyra’s or something.”
“Oh shit, right… I forgot about th—”
“We’ll worry about that later.” Shadow dismissed the interruption. “Doing this now, in front of everyone, I think that would be better.”
Jorge looked down at the box in Shadow’s hooves, then back at him. “Is this what I think it is…?”
“You’re the only person who’ll see this before everyone else, Jorge.” Shadow looked at him with a sincere look on his face. “Be glad I have enough trust in you for me to actually ask you for opinions.”
“Well? What are you waiting for, then?” Jorge raised an eyebrow. “Open the damn box!”
As Shadow opened the box, Jorge was finally able to get a good look on the ring before him, it was a silver ring tailored to fit Twilight’s horn, at the very front, there was a heart shaped amethyst gem surrounded by diamonds incised into the silver ring. At the sides of the gem, there were two round handles, also covered in diamond, which were both being held by the ends of the base of the ring, the tips of said ends also had their own layer of diamond.
The human gawked in awe, unable to believe the sight that was the ring in front of him.
“I’m not gonna even ask how you were able to afford this…”
“Yeah. Don’t.” Shadow simply nodded in agreement.
Jorge looked back up at the stallion. “Twilight’s one lucky mare. I think she’ll love it.”
“I hope so…” Shadow sighed. “You might wanna start working on waking up your waifu. Cause I’m gonna head back to the party, wait a few minutes, and then surprise her.”
“Dash’ll wake up sooner or later.” Jorge shrugged. “Believe me, waking her up during a nap? Not the best idea unless you want a grouchy Dashie for an hour or two.”
“‘Kay then, don’t wake her up…” Shadow closed the box, and hid it between his body and his wing. He quickly made his way out of the room, and onto the throne room. “If you wanna watch, you better hurry to where the party’s at.”
“Wouldn’t miss it!” Jorge smiled warmly, then proceeded to look down at the cuddly mare in his arms.
“...Maybe soon...it’ll be our turn…maybe...”
As Jorge entered the throne room, waifu still in his arms, he looked around for a place to sit. As soon as he found a chair casually sitting next to one of the walls, he quickly walked to it, and sat down, merely watching the party instead of taking part of it.
Besides, to him, nothing was better than having his waifu cuddle him in her sleep. Nothing.
Shadow looked over to Jorge, giving him a single nod, as if letting him know something was about to happen.
Jorge took the nod as a signal for the big event. He looked down at the sleeping pegasus, then back up at the stallion, he quickly nudged his head down, pointing towards the mare with his head, or rather, his face.
Shadow raised an eyebrow at the human’s actions, then nodded as soon as he figured it out. He returned his focus back on the party, while he waited for Jorge to do whatever it was he was gonna do.
Jorge frowned at the mare holding him, not wanting to disturb her, but at the same time, he wanted her to see what was about to take place. He slowly began caressing the back of her head, making gentle gestures to soothe her awake. It worked somewhat, as she stirred in his grasp, however, he needed something more to draw her attention. He slowly brought his face closer to her, and softly kissed her on the lips in an attempt to pull her out of her slumber.
The mare groggily opened her eyes, feeling a familiar sensation on her lips. Once she realized what was going on. She let go of his waist, and instead wrapped her forelegs around his neck, holding him close as she kissed him back, humming softly over her human’s actions.
Unfortunately for her, Jorge didn’t want to waste too much time, or draw too much unwanted attention, especially for what Shadow has planned. He grabbed her gently and pushed her off of him, eliciting a groan from the mare.
“Sorry to wake you up during your nap, Dashie…” Jorge muttered. “But I wanted you to see what’s about to happen…”
Dash rubbed an eye softly. “See what…?”
Jorge simply sat her down on his lap, her back facing his chest, and pointed off to the other couple.
Shadow turned his head to check on whatever Jorge was planning, only to see Dash sitting on his lap, watching as well. He took that as a sign to move on with his plan, and swiftly began to set it in motion.
“Honestly Fluttershy, I’m glad to have been dating Shadow for so long…” Twilight said to the timid pegasus in front of her. “Our relationship may have been a little… fast… but according to ‘Relationships 101’, not everyone’s relationships are the same. Jorge and Dash are the best example—”
“Hey… Twilight?” Shadow spoke up, grabbing the mare’s attention. Hearing a soft “hm?” from the mare in front of him, he took a deep breath, and spoke up once more. “I need to ask you something…”
“Alright, go ahead…?” Twilight raised an eyebrow, unsure where Shadow was going with this.
Shadow grabbed the box held in his wing, and passed it onto his hoof.
“Is he about to do what I think he’s about to do…?” Dash looked back to her boyfriend.
“Shh…” Jorge pointed back at the two. “Just watch…”
Shadow then kneeled down while holding the box, he then took a deep breath and opened the box then spoke, “Twilight, will you marry me?”
Instantly, the room went completely silent, everyone stopped to look at the two, not having completely processed the scene clearly. Even Dash simply froze watching, her mouth agape, her eyes opened as wide as they could be.
Twilight, on the other hand, was merely left speechless, every time she opened her mouth, she couldn’t seem to get a word to come out. Just the soft sounds of her trying to process a word, but failing.
Dash turned her head back at the now smiling human she was sitting on. “You knew, didn’t you?” She whispered.
“Just a little bit.” Jorge whispered back.
Dash turned her head back to the scene. “Say yes…” She whispered, hoping Twilight would hear her.
“S-Shadow…” Twilight stuttered. “I…” She quickly lost control of her emotions, as a tear escaped from her eye, slowly sliding down her face. With the biggest, dumbest grin on her face, she tackled him down, wrapping her hooves around the now surprised canadian. “You idiot! Of course I will!”
Shadow somehow managed to slip the ring the right way onto her horn. After doing so he wrapped his fore hooves back around her as they kissed in the position she had tackled him into.
Everyone in the room cheered and clapped for the two lovers, Pinkie being one of the most ecstatic. Even Dash had walked over to the couple, clapping alongside the rest of their friends.
The only one who hadn’t seemed to react as much as everyone else was Jorge, who was still sitting down in his chair, he cracked a smile for the happy couple. He was honestly happy for the two of them, he was also lucky that Shadow hasn’t knocked him out yet.
However, this little scene will only bring one major problem, and it won’t even concern the two of them. But rather, another couple that’s also currently in the room.
He could only hope it wouldn’t have to come to that.
As the room started to quiet down, everyone returned back to their own business, sometimes focusing on the couple the party was planned for, but nevertheless, everyone knew the party would be over sooner or later.
The more Jorge waited for the party to end, the more he kept thinking about his own relationship with Dash. As much as he loved her with all his heart, he can never seem to find the courage to finally ‘pop the question’, as they say. Deep down, he knew why, and he was afraid he would disappoint her because of it, after all, he’s already become disappointed in himself.
Before he even knew it, nearly everypony had already begun to leave, wanting to leave Shadow and Twilight to whatever business they have planned for the night. Everyone had said their goodbyes and “see you tomorrow”s, however Dash had asked if it was fine if she stayed for a while to talk with the lucky couple. Fortunately, the two were perfectly fine with that.
Although knowing Shadow, he’d probably prefer being in bed right now…
Jorge chuckled at the thought, knowing he’d probably would feel the same way, if he were in his place. Looking around, he realized everyone was already gone, wanting to make sure the inevitable was delayed for just a little longer, he figured it was best he’d head back home as well.
“Well guys…” He spoke up, catching the three off-guard. “I’mma head back home too.”
“Oh?” Shadow raised an eyebrow. “You alright, Jorge?”
“Hm?” Jorge also raised a ‘brow. “Yeah. I’m fine. I’m just… a little tired, that’s all.”
Shadow simply narrowed his eyes at the response he was given. “If you say so…”
With a nod, Jorge stood up from his chair, and made his way to the hall.
“Uh, if you girls excuse me for just a sec…” Shadow spoke quietly. “I need to go take care of something…”
The two mares simply nodded, and continued their conversation without him. He quickly followed Jorge’s path, making his way out of the castle entirely. As soon as the human was in sight, he called out to him.
“Jorge!”
The human froze in his tracks, paused for a moment, and turned his head back.
Shadow slowly started walking up to his cuban friend. “What’s wrong?”
“What?” Jorge turned his whole body around to face him. “I don’t know what you—”
“Don’t give me that shit, Jorge.” Shadow interrupted. “I’m not stupid.”
Jorge crossed his arms. “Nothing. I’m just glad you two are getting married. That’s all.”
“There’s more than that, Jorge.” Shadow rolled his eyes. “You’re not usually as quiet as you were earlier. What’s going on?”
“Aren’t you still going to punch m—”
“God dammit Jorge, stop trying to change the fucking subject.”
“I’m not—”
“Yes you are.” Shadow interrupted again, he then punched Jorge lightly in the arm, saying “There, you wanted me to punch you, so I did, now tell me what the fuck is wrong.”
“It’s Dash…”
“What about her?”
“You two have been dating for only a year, and you went from first base to a home run in less than a week. And now? You proposed.” Jorge shrugged. “It took two weeks for Dash and I to go official, and I still haven’t even gotten a ring.”
“I still don’t see why this is a big deal?” Shadow raised an eyebrow, still trying to piece together the information he’s being given.
“Dash is an impatient mare, Shadow.” Jorge sighed. “When she gets tired of waiting for something, you can tell. She starts to get stubborn upon mentioning whatever it is she’s waiting on, and it’ll just start to bother every fiber of her being.”
“Okay, and?”
“Shadow, let me remind you of what just happened. You married Twilight in only a year, and Dash has been bugging me about marriage for a while now. The fact that you did it first, is only going to make this more agonizingly annoying.
“So then, just ask her to marry you? It’s basically a guaranteed yes at this point.”
“That’s the problem.” Jorge shrugged. “I don’t want to. Not yet.”
“Why not?”
Jorge simply stayed silent, pretending he hadn’t ignored that last question.
“Jorge, I can see you heard me, and I kindly ask as one of your closest friends that you answer.”
“And I’m kindly telling one of my closest friends that you’re better off not asking.”
“Fine, then. We’ll just use Twilight’s truth spell, and see how well you can keep your mouth sealed then.”
“Fine by me.” Jorge rolled his eyes. “You won’t get any answers.”
“Yeah? We’ll see about that.” Shadow leaped up into the air, started flying high enough to look face-to-face with the human, grabbed his arm, and began pulling him back into the castle, the human in question, however, was still completely silent.
Eventually, the two made it back to the throne room, where Twilight and Dash were still casually talking. Dash turned her head to see the canadian stallion pulling the human back into the room. She raised an eyebrow and cocked her head to the side, curious over what she’s seeing.
“Shadow?” Dash spoke softly. “Uh… Everything okay?”
Letting go of the human’s hand, he landed back down on the ground. “I hate to have to ruin our anniversary, Twily, but uh… I need you to use that truth spell again.”
Twilight simply raised an eyebrow. “What’s going on?”
“Something’s up with Jorge, and he’s not telling me.” Shadow explained. “So if he doesn’t want to talk to one of the few closest friends he has in private, then we’ll all hear it ourselves.”
“Are you sure that’s a good idea?” Twilight inquired. “What exactly is the problem?”
“Why he’s afraid to pop the big question.” Shadow sighed.
Dash blinked. “Huh? Really? That’s what this is all about?”
Shadow looked over to the human, wondering if he’d respond, but got nothing. Instead, the human sat down on the floor, ignoring the question.
“Something’s bothering him. Either something to do with marrying, or something. But now I need to know.” He spoke. “Whatever it is, he needs to get it off his chest.”
Twilight simply looked over to the human, whom responded with a single nod. As if giving her the ‘OK’ to complete Shadow’s request.
“Jorge…?” Dash walked up to her lover. “You can tell me what’s going on, right? What’s wrong?”
Jorge remained silent.
“Fine, it’s gonna be that way, then.” Twilight spoke up, instantly catching Dash’s attention. Upon noticing Twilight’s glowing horn, Dash quickly moved out of the way, letting the alicorn do her thing.
With a quick burst of magic shot into the human, he was now completely under the spell, and Shadow was the first to speak up and use it to his advantage.
“How do I know it worked?” He asked.
“Ask him a question?” Twilight replied.
He looked back to the human. “How do you feel?”
“Oh, I don’t know. I’m under a truth spell. What do you think?”
“I’m gonna take that as a ‘it’s working’...” Shadow shook his head. “Right, onto business. Is it true that there’s something bothering you?”
“Yes.”
“Is it something serious enough to make you afraid of marrying Rainbow Dash?”
“Not afraid, per se, more worried, than anything.” Jorge rolled his eyes.
“Worried for what?”
Jorge’s eye suddenly twitched, though he refused to answer the question.
Shadow blinked at the odd occurrence. “...Jorge… Worried for what?”
Suddenly, his whole head twitched to the side, however he stayed silent.
“What the fuck…?” Shadow asked, his mouth agape. He quickly turned his head to Twilight. “Can you make the spell stronger?”
“Uh, there are a few side-effects if I do that…”
“Like..what?”
“Well, uh, let’s see…” Twilight’s horn was wrapped by its signature purple glow once more, and with a quick flash of light, her spellbook appeared in front of her.
“Hmph.” Jorge huffed. “Willing to do whatever it takes, old friend?”
“At this point, I believe the decision is Dash’s. Old friend.” Shadow sighed.
“Right. So Jorge is currently infused with a level four truth spell.” Twilight explained, “Which that alone already has a few minor side-effects. Mild-aggression, 5% chance of making the subject going insane while under the spell, but the insanity wears off once the spell’s no longer in use, and depending if he’s had enough training to resist the spell’s effects, his body may twitch.”
“Depending if he’s had enough training?” Shadow asked, and quickly turned his head back over to the human. “You’ve been training for something like this?”
“Yep.” Jorge flashed a cocky smirk. “You didn’t think I’d prepare for something like this?” He then placed a thinking hand on his chin, “Well. Not this moment, exactly. More like if something happened and they had me for interrogation or something. I wasn’t really expecting this.”
Shadow turned his head back to Twilight, “What happens if we crank up the level?” he queried.
“Uh…” Twilight looked back at her book. “Level five causes higher aggression, 15% chance of insanity while under the spell, has a 5% chance of damaging his body upon resistance, the other 95% will do more than just a twitch.”
“And I’ll bet you’re just dying to know how I had time to pull off something like this.” Jorge cut in.
“Whats level seven do?”
“Uh…” Twilight uttered. “...It doesn’t say. The only recorded information on the truth spell goes up to level six, no one’s had to go beyond that before.”
“Whats level six do?”
“C’mon, Twilight. Why don’t you tell them? It wasn’t that big of a secret, anyway…” Jorge chuckled.
“What’s he talking about?” Dash asked worriedly.
“Level six has a small chance of leaving the subject mentally insane, 30% chance to—”
“Define small chance.”
“It doesn’t say. There weren’t enough cases to give an exact answer.”
“Twily, I need you to answer this truthfully, how high of a level did you train him to resist?”
“...What?” Dash raised an eyebrow.
“...Honestly, I didn’t think Jorge was gonna make it past level four. The first time I used the truth spell I only gave him a dose of level one.”
“So that means… what, exactly?” Shadow raised an eyebrow.
“I’ve been training for a good year or so, Shadow.” Jorge crossed his arms. “There’s a few other spells I wanted to learn to counter in case of an emergency. This, however, isn’t the emergency I anticipated. This is more of a coincidence..”
“Dash, it's up to you if we crank it up, seeing it could do Jorge harm.”
Dash looked over to the human, who still wore that cocky smirk on his face. Speaking in a soft, almost sad voice, “Jorge...please tell me…Is it really that bad…?”
The smirk on his face faded away, and instead of responding, he closed his eyes as his head twitched once more.
Dash closed her eyes, trying to hold back the few tears that were trying to escape from her eyes.
“...What else does level six do, Twilight?”
Shadow simply went wide-eyed, he looked over to his fiancée, who was also wide-eyed over the question. She shook her head and looked back down at the book.
“...30% chance to damage any part of his body, but not enough to send him to the hospital or anything… 30% chance of insanity while under the spell, 10% chance to deal enough damage to leave a mark, 5% to actually leave him with something worth visiting, and…1.2% chance of putting him.. Into a coma.”
Shadow quickly reacted, “Dash. Be very careful with your next decis—”
“Do it...” She muttered.
Jorge opened his eyes, raising an eyebrow at the mare’s choice.
Twilight blinked. “R-Rainbow are you sure you wa—”
“Just do it, Twilight!” Dash shouted, her patience growing even thinner.
Twilight immediately began to fear for the worst. She looked over to her fiancé with a worried look. “Shadow… be ready to hold him down if anything happens…”
He simply nodded.
Twilight sighed, charged her horn for another shot at the only human she could actually call a friend. Cranking the spell up to level six, the spell escaped from her horn, and completely entered Jorge’s entire body.
“So, it’s come down to this…” Jorge whispered.
“Whatever he may say, just remember the spell’s also causing his aggression to be…”
Jorge rolled his eyes. “...to be, what. Catastrophic?” He scoffed. “I doubt that. If anything, it’s actually started to have shown me the truth.”
“Shadow…” Dash spoke up softly. “...You do the honors.”
Looking over to the stallion sitting next to him, he scoffed once more. “I think Shadow’s a little bit freaked out worrying if slip into a coma or not to even dare ask.”
“What are you worried for?” Shadow asked flatly.
Jorge groaned. “...I’m worried for Dash.” He grabbed his arm, clutching it in his hand. “You’re just gonna drive it out of me slowly, aren’t you? You’re not even gonna ask what ‘truth’ it is I see?”
Shadow slowly moved towards him, and pinning him. Then spoke, “Why are you worried for Dash when asking her to marry you..?”
Jorge winced at a sudden sharp pain in his leg. Attempting to shrug it off, he cracked a soft grin. “Heh. My own friends and marefriend, going through such lengths over a simple question.”
“You’re making me ask again...” sighed Shadow, then speaking in a deeper tone, “Why are you worried for Dash when asking her to marry you?”
Jorge screamed at the pain now delivered to his back. Sighing, he spoke up. “I’m worried...she’ll regret her choice…”
“What choice of hers..?” Shadow asked calmly.
“It’s kinda obvious, don’t you think?” Jorge raised an eyebrow. “Or are you really trying to milk this for all the pain you can bring, huh?”
“Jorge…” Dash cut in. “Why do you think I’d regret saying yes?”
Jorge hissed as his arm began to bruise, even Shadow took notice, realizing how far the spell’s trying to go in making him talk.
“Feels like each part of my body’s either getting stabbed or slammed into a brick wall…” Jorge chuckled. “Just remember that all of you wanted this to happen.”
”Dash, would you like to leave the room? I can tell you ever—”
“No. I want to be here and listen with my own ears.”
“Alright…” Shadow replied softly, “I’m sorry old friend, but why are—”
”...Because I’m an idiot.”
“What was that?” Shadow raised an eyebrow.
Jorge closed his eyes, as a tear swiftly fell from his face. “I’m scared that Dash would regret marrying me, because I’m an idiot.”
Shadow just sat there, keeping Jorge pinned and looked up at Rainbow Dash.
“I’ve made… so many mistakes in my life…” Jorge muttered. “I’ve lost count, at this point…”
“But… Jorge, everyone’s made mistakes, what makes yours any different?” Shadow asked curiously.
“The first thing I ever did when I got to Equestria, was try to do a stupid dare. Look where that had me. I get dragged back into Equestria again, only to be treated like total shit for the first five minutes. Then I bug Twilight to open the portal again just to bring my dog here. Only to cause the portal to come back on it’s own, and bring you and Ish here.”
“Jorge, I’ve done a lot of stupid things, too.” Dash softly spoke up. “I even broke my wing once trying to practice one of my flying tricks…”
“Now compare that to the second-degree burns I get from saving Ish. And look at the thanks I get from that fucktard. Hell, if it weren’t for me in the first place, neither Shadow nor Ish would be here, and I wouldn’t have had to go through everything we went through.”
“But, then I would’ve never met Twilight.” Shadow countered.
“Yeah. One good thing came out of this. Dash has helped save the world countless times. What have I done? Screw things over.”
“Jorge, remember the first day we kissed?” Dash interjected.
“How could I forget? We played Go Fish like little kids.”
“...Besides that.” Dash shook her head. “Do you know why I kissed you that day?”
Jorge shook his head.
“Because, Jorge, there’s no one in Equestria I know that’s brave enough to steal the elements, and take on the princesses?”
“Brave, or stupid?” Jorge attempted to correct.
“And to steal the Elements from us. To steal one of them from me.” Dash ignored Jorge’s ‘correction’. “You’d either have to be brain dead or really brave to try something like that. And then when I hear you’re not all that bad, I felt bad…” Dash simply let the tears she was holding back do whatever they pleased. “I started avoiding you cause I didn’t know whether to hit you for doing something that stupid or congratulate you for having the courage to do something that stupid.”
Jorge tried to get up to embrace his marefriend, but Shadow kept holding him down.
“And then you start trying to tell me all these nice things about me… First it’s just small things like “you’re awesome” and how I never leave my friends behind, or back down from a challenge… But then you start saying my mane is pretty, and… you even almost called me adorable…” Dash chuckled softly. “If someone else would’ve told me that, I probably would’ve yelled at them. But, there was just something about you, I needed to see for myself if you were really as good as I thought. Plus, I might have gotten carried away a little that night and asked you to keep complimenting.”
“You even had the balls to protect your own friend from Tirek, even though Ish didn’t even deserve to be saved, but, eh. You still did it.” Dash added. “So are you really gonna tell me that you’re an idiot? Are you really gonna say how awful your mistakes are? Let’s not even forget that I totally forgot that we were supposed to give you fake elements! I love you, Jorge. Nothing’s gonna change that.”
“...Nothing?”
“Nothing.”
Shadow looked over to his fiancée. “I think we can take the spell off now, Twilight…”
Twilight nodded, her horn glowing once more, covering Jorge in her magic one more, then quickly faded away.
Shadow got off from the human, and whispered to his fiancée once more, “Is there anyway for you to only have him frozen still temporarily…? I need him to be if I'm to fly him to the hospital safely. I can’t unfreeze him myself.”
“Yeah, it's just the same spell I used to test on him the first time, just with a timed counterspell thrown in.” Twilight nodded.
“If you could do that please.”
Twilight looked over to the human on the floor, cuddling with his mare as the two lied there on the floor.
“Yeah, I could do that…”
“Thank you, Twily.” Shadow said quietly as he lifted Jorge and started flying, “I’ll come get you when you can visit… Dash.”
Dash simply nodded in response.
As the two make their way out the castle, Twilight walked up to the prismatic mare.
“Well, Rainbow Dash… It looks like you're getting what you want after all…” She said softly.
“I doubt he's gonna pop the question anytime soon after all this, Twilight.” Dash chuckled. “But at least he's more keen on doing it than earlier.”
“How much longer you think it'll take to get him to want to use the transformation spell?”
“Can't say, really.” Dash shrugged. “But whenever he does, I'll probably be ready to start a family.”
“Glad to see things are going your way, Rainbow Dash.” Twilight smiled.
“...What about you?” Dash tilted her head to the side. “When do you think you two will start a family?”
“Actually, I think we alre—...” Twilight ended her sentence short by covering her mouth with a hoof. Gaining a raised eyebrow from Dash, she smiled sheepishly.
“...I don't know, yet…”
Author's Note
Well guys. It's been a long and bumpy road. But we've made it. We've finally completed "How I Lived In Equestria"! Honestly it was kinda hard to have 3 guys work on the same story. But most of our problems didn't arise until we started Arc 2. Since that's when Shadow and Ish actually become characters in the story. And so requiring their help suddenly became an all-time problem. I could do a decent imitation of them. But no one could really capture their likeness better than themselves. So that started making the story take a lot longer than we'd had hoped. But, at least it's finally over...
Thanks for reading, everyone!
Also, thanks again to Daszkin (https://www.fimfiction.net/user/Daszkin) for making the art in the beginning of the chapter! <3
Italic letters? What italic letters? I don't see any...

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                 Chapter 3-1: The Big Day                  
//-------------------------------------------------------//
Chapter 3-1: The Big Day
“Who goes there?” boomed Princess Luna in her royal canterlot voice, “Why have thou entered the castle? Guards! Where art thou!?”
The dark figure just kept walking forward until they stood 10 or so feet in front of Princess Luna’s throne, he then kneeled before her and bowed his head.
Curious to the figure’s actions she then tilted her head only able to see a dark purple mark in what seemed to be shaped like a flame for their cutie mark, and in her royal voice spoke once more, “Why have thou come here? I demand thou answer—” But then she noticed something dark purple and black out of the corner of her eye. She looked over and gasped. “There is no way..” she stuttered, “The tantabus.. It-It’s back..”
The Tantabus then proceeded to block out the sun in blackness as it did when it first had rein over her nightmares. As black rays shot down through the broken window between the two thrones Luna floated up into the air. Transforming into Nightmare Moon once again. She floated down while cackling evilly.
“I am at your service, my master.” spoke the dark figure, still kneeling and bowing their head.
“Good, good. Now to go over our plan.” boomed Nightmare Moon, “Celestia nor her petty student will be able to stop me this time.” she laughed loudly.
Luna suddenly awoke sweating, frightened from the nightmare moments ago. “It-it can’t be back..that's im-impossible.” she stuttered to herself. Quickly glancing around her room to see if anyone had noticed anything. She let out a sigh of relief as no one was there.
But as she did one of her guards looked into her room. Looking concerned, he queried to her, “Are you alright Princess? I heard you talking in your sleep.”
“Yes yes, I am quite alright, thank you for checking though.” replied Luna quickly
“Of course Princess.” spoke the guard, now closing the door again. Luna sighed. Deeply troubled by the nightmare that held her moments ago. She just sat there, thinking about that dark figure that she could not fully see, and their cutie mark... the flame... It looked almost exactly like the tantabus.
“So, Shadow… Marriage.”
“Hm?”
“How’s that feel?”
“The fuck you mean by that?” Shadow raised an eyebrow.
“Well, you’re the one marrying, and I’ve been here longer than you!” Jorge shrugged. “I was just wondering how you felt about it.”
“Well, I don’t really know, although I was faster than you at this and other things.”
“That’s not the point…”
“Oh, I know... but now it is.”
Jorge deadpanned. “Fine. Ruin my perfectly good conversation.” He crossed his arms. “See if I care.”
“Why do you always expect the opposite of what I have always done from me?”
“Shut up.”
“Fine, but don’t expect me to stay quiet.”
“Whatever.” Jorge huffed. “By the way, did your fianceé ever mention why the hell she dragged us to Canterlot with her?”
“She dragged me to Canterlot with her. You just wanted to tag along.”
“...Oh right…”
“Exactly, but I don’t know why she wanted us to co—” Shadow was immediately interrupted as he fell over, bumping into a tall, white stallion wearing his purple-gold captain’s armor. The stallion simply cleared his throat at the clumsy Canadian, while Jorge simply stepped back a few steps in a sad attempt to keep a distance from him.
“Shieldbutt!” Jorge spread his arms open. “Long time no see!”
Shining Armor simply glared up at the Cuban. “Godson.”
“Oh. No, my name’s Jorge.” Jorge shook his head. “I’m surprised you didn’t hear about the name change.”
“Shieldbutt?” snickered Shadow.
“I have not.” Shining shook his head. “I’ve been dealing with more important things.” He sighed. “I assume you’re still as retarded as ever?”
“No!” Jorge retorted. “...I mean. No.” He quickly shook his head, snapping back to normal. “I’ve… actually begun to outgrow that little act.
“Oh really?”
“No he hasn’t.”
“Just a tiny bit.” Jorge shrugged. “Believe me, if I wanted to steal Philomena’s feathers again, I’d ask Celestia first.”
”No he wouldn’t.”
“I see.” Shining nodded, then immediately looked down at the stallion who refused to get up. “And I assume you’re a friend of his?”
“Uh...I’ve never met this cuban in my life before.”
“I never said he was cuban.”
“...Fuck.” Shadow spoke under his breath, slowly getting up. “Yeah. I know this retard.” He nudged his head in Jorge’s direction.
”Hey!”
Both Shining and Shadow ignored the human, and continued their conversation.
Shadow extended a hoof, hoping the stallion in front of him would accept the hoofshake. “The name’s Shadow. Nice to meet you.”
Shining looked down at the stranger’s hoof, then back up at him. He paused for a moment, causing the Canadian to worry, but, to his surprise, Shining smiled. “Likewise.”
“Holy fuck.” Shadow thought. “For a second, I thought he was gonna arrest me for touching his armor.”
“So.” Shining spoke. “What brings you two to Canterlot?” Shining tilted his head, then quickly shook his head. “Rather, the more important question…” He pointed at the Cuban. “What brings you back?”
“I was forcibly drag—”
“You fucking liar.” Shadow interrupted. “You insisted on tagging along.”
“Okay, fine, I did.” Jorge rolled his eyes. “I’m bored. What do you expect from me?”
“As long as you don’t decide to play ‘The Price is Rice’, again.” Shining shrugged. “I suppose it’s fine.”
“B-But…! Didn’t you like the banana prizes?”
“Not really.”
“It’s cause you’re a sourpuss.”
Shining simply narrowed his eyes.
“QUICK SHADOW HELP ME DISS HI—”
“FUCK YOU JORGE I’D LIKE TO STAY ON HIS GOOD SIDE THANK YOU VERY MUCH”
“CAN YOU TWO NOT YELL LIKE A BUNCH OF IDIOTS?” Shining interrupted their moment.
“Uh. Lemme think about it…”
“TWILIGHT I’M NOT READY TO GO BACK TO JAIL!”
“Shining, let him go…” Twilight rolled her eyes. “It’s not worth it. Not again.”
Shining looked back at the human held in his magic aura, then back at his little sister. “Fine.”
“Thank Go—” Before Jorge could finish his sentence, he was immediately thrown in Twilight’s general direction, landing on the floor in front of her.
“For the record, I thought he deserved it.“ Shadow smiled sheepishly.
“Trust me, I’d like nothing more than that.” Twilight commented. “But there’s also the fact I’d have to deal with Rainbow’s complaining for locking him up.”
Jorge slowly got up, ignoring the small pain he felt from being thrown at the floor. He grabbed his glasses, noticing part of the lens was cracked, and the handle was missing.
“Aw man.” He groaned. “This is the… uh… twentieth time they’ve broke, now?”
Twilight glared at the human and his glasses. Wanting to avoid his complaining, she immediately cast a spell on the glasses, repairing them instantly.
“...I didn’t even sa—”
“You were going to.”
Jorge blinked. “I… wasn’t, actually.” He put his glasses back on as he continued speaking. “I was actually gonna ask if you could do something else instead, but, nevermind now…”
“Jorge, I don’t think they have spells to fix eyesight.” Shadow shrugged. “Besides, you would look weird as fuck without them.”
“Whatever.” Jorge shrugged, returning back to the situation at hand. He glared back at Shining, then immediately turned his head back to Twilight. “I’m just gonna… go see where Celestia is…”
“Why?” Twilight raised an eyebrow.
“I wanna see if she’ll feed me another banana.”
“...Why would she do that?” Shadow curiously asked, his head tilting as he tried to understand.
“Don’t ask.” Jorge and Twilight both deadpanned at the Canadian, leaving him even more confused.
It also didn’t help that Jorge simply left the area entirely, leaving only the three of them to whatever it was they were doing earlier.
“You better not—”
“I’m not gonna touch the damn bird, Shieldbutt!”
Shining sighed, then walked up to his little sister. “So… When am I gonna meet this fiancé of yours, Twily?”
Shadow immediately widened his eyes, and slowly began walking away backwards in a sad attempt to leave the area.
“Huh?” Twilight blinked. “You mean he hasn’t already said something?”
“Hm?” Shining cocked his head to the side. “Are you saying I’ve already met him, before?”
Twilight looked at the nervous stallion behind her brother. “Shadow, you haven’t said anything, yet?”
Shadow immediately froze in place, watching as both of them now practically stared at him. “Uh… not yet...I was getting to that...”
“Wait.” Shining blinked. “He’s your fiancé?!”
“Uh… Surprise…?” Shadow smiled sheepishly.
“You made sure Ish didn’t receive an invite to this party...right Jorge?” asked a nervous Shadow, trying to make sure everything is perfect. A side-effect from dating Twilight for so long.
“I did. But... it’s Ish.He’s going to show up anyways.” Jorge replied calmly.
“Well did you make preparations for when he does?”
“Why do you think I have this?” Jorge spoke as he lifted up a baseball bat, “The bush is also ready to receive a very unconscious Ish.”
“Good.” Shadow said, trying to hold back his laughter at Jorge’s plan.
“I heard you shits mention me,” Ish spoke from behind Jorge, scaring both him and his Canadian friend. “Do you need me to meme something?”
“QUICK! DO IT NOW!”
“Wha—” Before Ish could even say another word, Jorge firmly grasped the baseball bat, swinging it against the asian’s head. He immediately fell to the floor, unconscious once more.
“Y’know.” Jorge spoke. “I’m starting to feel bad for him.”
“I’m not.” Shadow replied.
“No, but like… We’ve knocked him out, like, three times now?” Jorge asked.
“Four.”
“Four? Holy shit…” Jorge shook his head, returning back to his original statement. “Anyways... And then not to mention the whole giving him back to Lyra. And only God knows how much hell we went through getting him back out.”
“...I still don’t feel bad for him. He’s a dick to me at all the wrong times.”
“Eh. Now that you just reminded me about that. I don’t feel bad anymore...”
“Oh, hey Shining, didn’t know if you would make it or not.”
“Well, you are marrying my sister. I might as well get to know you a little better...”
“True...so I guess I will get interrogated by the captain of the royal guard in my lifetime afterall.”
Shining chuckled. “Relax. I’m not gonna interrogate you. I just want to make sure you’re not like…” He looked over to Jorge and Big Mac, one of them was chugging a bottle of potent cider, while the other was repeatedly chanting “chug!” over and over.
And it was obvious who was the one chanting.
Both of the stallions watched with deadpan expressions as Jorge continuously kept shouting “chug!”, pushing Big Mac further into his pursuit.
“Right… Well you don’t have to worry about me being like that, Jorge, however, that’s nothing new.”
“And yet he expects me to believe he’s outgrown all that stupidity.”
“Yeah… Pretty much, at this point I take everything he says with a grain of salt.”
“Quite honestly. I wouldn’t mind his actions, if he’d know when to stop.” Shining sighed.
“Oh, he does.” Shadow shrugged. “But there are times when he just doesn’t care.”
“He needs to start caring more often, then…”
“I kind of just stopped paying attention to it, it doesn’t really affect me anymore. But I fail to see how any of this has to do with you learning about me…”
“Well. He’s your friend.”
“Yeah. And he’s also your sister’s friend.”
“Fair enough.” Shining nodded.
Jorge, now growing bored of shouting “chug!” at Big Mac, decided to join the two in their conversation, he grabbed a nearby chair, and dragged it over to their table, and proceeded to sit down.
“So, Shadow. You never did mention who was planning your wedding.” He simply stated.
“I thought it was obvious…?”
“Pinkie?”
“Who do you think?”
“Hmph. And she didn’t even ask if I wanted to help.” Jorge muttered. “I’m both your best friend and your best man. And I don’t get any rights to help.”
“In my defense, Twilight was the one who asked Pinkie to plan it...not me.” Shadow shrugged.
“Yeah. Well Pinkie’s gonna hear a piece of my mind, later…” Jorge grumbled.
“You let this idiot be your best man?” Shining raised an eyebrow towards Shadow. “...Seriously?”
Jorge simply shrugged, ignoring Shining’s comment, instead, he leaned back on his chair, and rested his legs on another table not too far away.
“Yeah. Well. He’s a lot better than the idiot currently unconscious in the bushes outside.” Shadow replied.
Shining blinked. “What?”
“What?” Shadow blinked back. “What were we talking about again?”
“Me.” Jorge cut in. “You were both complaining about how I’m the best man.”
“I was not!” Shadow retorted.
“You were thinking it, though.” Jorge crossed his arms. “I’ve… gotten used to it, already.”
“Considering you haven’t tried to argue about it, I can kinda believe that.” Shadow nodded slowly.
Jorge shrugged. “So, Shadow. Twilight.”
“...What about her?”
“How often have you banged her?”
Shadow’s hoof had now met its new home; his face.
“And now you see why I pretended to not know this idiot, when I first met you.”
“Relax, Shadow.” Jorge shrugged. “I’m only bothering you. I mean, it’s not like I’m trying to piss you off in front of your fianceé’s brother, or anything.”
“Didn’t he claim earlier that he was your best friend?” Shining whispered to the stallion next to him.
“Trust me. Under all that stupidity, he can be… not retarded.” Shadow whispered back.
Jorge simply chuckled some more. “Despite the fact I can hear you two.” He replied. “Would you really want a more serious-based Jorge?”
“Yes.” The two in front of him deadpanned.
Jorge immediately shrugged. “Fine. At least I didn’t make love within the first five days in my relationship.”
“What?” Shining went wide-eyed, nearly instantly shifting his view at the also shocked stallion next to him.
“Um...I plead section 13 of the Canadian Charter of Rights and Freedoms.”
“The fuck is that supposed to mean!?” Jorge cut in.
“It’s the same thing as pleading the fifth, dumbass.” Shadow deadpanned.
”It sounds gay though…”
“Wait. You did what?” Shining raised an eyebrow, still confused over the cuban’s statement.
“Oh, like you haven’t banged your marefriend slash wife within the first five days of your relationship.” Jorge suddenly grew an evil smirk. “I mean, seriously, the Princess of Love? Something’s bound to happen sooner or later…”
Shadow simply blinked as the cuban had shifted his target to Twilight’s brother, whom immediately shifted his view to the cocky human.
“You wanted a serious-based Jorge?” Jorge removed his feet from the nearby table, crossing his arms as he continued his assault, he then slammed his hands against their table, never letting go of his evil smirk. “You got it.”
“Yeah?!” Shining shouted, then quickly faded into a more calm attitude. “...That’s none of your business.”
“Just like Shadow’s personal life is none of yours.” Jorge huffed.
The two stallions simply blinked, looked at each other, then back at Jorge.
“You’re so determined in trying to learn just about everything about Shadow before the wedding, that you make it seem so obvious you’re practically interrogating him.”
“Where are you going with this?” Shining cocked his head to the side.
“I’m saying if you really wanted to get to know Shadow… as a pony, not as the guy marrying your little sister, you wouldn’t need to scare his balls off.”
Shining’s attitude slowly shifted from a mix of confusion and anger to a more calmer attitude. “Heh…” He chuckled, looking over to the Canadian next to him. “Now I see why he’s your best man.”
“You do?” Shadow blinked. “Cause… I don’t.”
“Well.” Jorge stood from his chair. “It appears my work here is done.” He returned the chair back to its original position. “I’mma go stop by Twilight’s bachelorette party and pick up Dash. I’m more than sure she’s already drunk and needing someone to take her home.”
Shining simply nodded, while Shadow still remained dumbfounded by the events that had just occurred earlier. Soon enough, the human had left the area, leaving the two (plus an unconscious Big Mac) in the room.
Shadow shook his head, still wanting to understand. “...What just happened?”
Jorge stormed into the building in which Twilight had her bachelorette party, wanting to give a certain pink mare a piece of his mind.
The doors were nearly thrown open, and soon afterwards, a large roar was heard throughout the entire room.
“PINKIE PIEEEEE!” Jorge shouted in a fit of fiery rage.
Pinkie blinked upon hearing her name being called in such an angry tone. “Whoop. Looks like that’s my cue!” And, in an instant, she had jumped from her chair, and clumsily bounced her way off to the enraged human.
“Hiya, Goddy!” Pinkie smiled, then shook her head. “No, wait… You changed your name…” She then shook her head rapidly for a good second, then returned back to normal. “Hiya, Jorgie!”
Jorge raised an eyebrow at Pinkie’s odd behavior, somehow losing his enraged attitude over the massive amount of confusion that had now replaced it.
“Uh. Pinks…? You alright?”
“Never better!” Pinkie made an odd gesture with her hoof to help emphasize her sentence, only for it to fail, and have her trip, instead.
“I was… originally gonna yell at you about planning Shadow’s wedding without me… Seeing how I’m his best friend and all…” Jorge narrowed his eyes at the party mare. “...But I think you’re just a tiny bit drunk…”
“N-Nah!” Pinkie got back up. “I’m just a little… excited for Twilight, y’know?”
“And by that, you mean you all got really drunk, didn’t you?”
“Just a tiny bit…” Pinkie giggled. “It was funnnn.”
“Right.” Jorge nodded slowly, trying to avoid the rest of this conversation before it went downhill. “I’m just gonna go grab Dash and head back home for the night. Shadow’s wedding is tomorrow, and I wanna be ready for that shit.”
“That’s right!” Pinkie stated. “You’re Shadie’s best-man!”
“Yep…” Jorge quickly began walking away. “So y’know, I gotta get up early, so I can do my best-manly things…” Soon after, he ignored the rest of Pinkie’s comments, and began walking around in an attempt to find his marefriend.
”Have funnnnn!”
Eventually, he came across a bar area, where Dash had casually been occupying one of the few seats there. As expected, Dash was chugging what seemed to be her fifth cup of cider.
Normally, he would’ve been fine with that, but knowing her, he can already see this situation going downhill.
Luckily, there was another seat to the right of the mare, which he decided he should occupy. Once he sat down, the bartender walked up to the him, waiting for his order. Upon hearing the order, he nodded, and proceeded to place a cup in front of him. Eventually, his cup was filled with cider.
He simply took a sip, glancing over to the mare at his side.
“Another!” Dash spoke loudly, slamming her cup down on the table.
“Lady, that’s your fifth cup already, don’t you think you’ve had enough?” The bartender raised an eyebrow.
“No!” Dash slammed a hoof against the table. “Not until I freakin’ pass out!”
“She’ll do it, too.” Jorge shrugged, taking a sip of his cider. “Don’t worry, I’ll pay for it.”
Dash looked over to the sound of the voice, finding her human sitting on the chair next to her.
“Jorge!” She cheered. “What’re you… -hic- ...doing here?”
“Well. I was here to come take you back home.” Jorge explained. “But you seem so persistent on getting stupidly drunk. So, heh, knock yourself out. I’ll be here, with my one cup.” He spun his chair around a bit, facing her. “But if you end up with a stupidly huge hangover tomorrow, that’s your problem. I mean, look at Twilight.” He glanced over to the alicorn. “Looks like she’s enjoying herself pretty well, without going berserk on the drinks. Since tomorrow’s her wedding, and all.”
“Oh… -hic- ...right.” Dash facehoofed. “It’s tomorrow.” She smiled sheepishly, spreading her forelegs, leaving herself right open to a hug from her human. “Could you please carry me home?”
“What about your sixth cu—”
“I’ll pay for it…” Dash interrupted. “Though you’re drinking it…”
“I’ve already had enough alcohol for the night.” Jorge chuckled. “It’s fine, just leave it there.”
“You sure?”
Jorge nodded, pulling the appropriate amount of bits from his other pocket. “I’m sure.”
“Thanks, Jorgieee~.”
Jorge rolled his eyes with a chuckle, placing the bits down onto the table, leaving his seat, and picking up the mare from her own seat. She wrapped her hooves around him, sighing contently as she felt his warm body against hers.
The human waved goodbye to the alicorn a short distance away, and while it took a second for her to understand what was going on, she quickly chuckled, and waved back.
“Hey, Jorgie…” Dash spoke up, now realizing they were outside of the building.
“Yes, Dashie?”
“You know what you should do…?”
“No, I do not.” Jorge shook his head. “What should I do?”
“You should totally buy a ring and propose, already…” Dash giggled. “Preferably one of those rings that goes on your wings.”
“So, a wing ring?”
Dash quickly bursted into a small fit of laughter upon hearing ‘wing ring’. Leaving the human to chuckle at the tipsy mare’s reaction.
“Y’know, you can really hold your alcohol, huh?” Jorge raised an eyebrow. “It takes ten of those bottles of cider back at Pony Sands Resort to get you super drunk, but five of those cups of cider to get you all…”
“Tipsy?”
“I was actually debating on moody and giggly, but I suppose that’s the more blunt way of putting it.”
Dash giggled, resting her head on his shoulder. “Mmm. Maybe it’s because you’re so funny tonight…”
“If you say so, Dash.”
“Hey.” Dash lifted her head up, moving her face right in front of his view, blocking it entirely, forcing him to stop his walking to prevent bumping into anything. She then slowly began narrowing her eyes, leaving them half-closed. Though it wasn’t a look of anger, it looked more like a look of clumsiness, and a bad attempt at seducing the human. “How about you and I…” She leaned her face closer to his. “...have a little fun tonight?”
“We’ll see, Dash.” Jorge chuckled, pecking the mare on the lips. He watched as she blinked, her eyes returning back to normal as she slowly tried to process what happened, then giggled as she laid her head back on his shoulder.
“Hey, Jorgie?”
“Yes?”
“You wanna hear something funny?”
“Sure.”
“Wing ring.”
“So Jorge, how many party cannons do you think Pinkie shoved into the plans for my wedding?” Shadow queried.
“I’ve seen Pinkie do weddings before. Who do you think was hired to plan Cadence and Shining’s wedding?” Jorge replied, raising an eyebrow.
“The only one there is to hire...Pinkie...right?”
“Of course.” Jorge nodded.
Well, how many do you think she’ll have there?” Shadow asked curiously.
“Well, I’m not sure if Pinkie brought any last time.” Jorge shrugged. “It’s possible she may not bring any at all.”
“Well, she’ll probably have brought at least one, just because it’s me get—” Shadow started to say but was cut off as he tripped over air, bumping into a tall, pink alicorn on his way down.
“Damn, Shadow. Your luck is impeccable, isn’t it?” Jorge laughed at the stallion’s clumsiness. “In the span of two days, you’ve tripped and bumped into both Shining and Cadance!”
“I’ve noticed…” mumbled Shadow, still on the ground.
“Hey there, Godson!” Cadance cheered.
“Of course you haven’t been told about my name reveal.”
“Oh, I have.” Cadance chided. “I just wanted to see your reaction if I said the wrong name.”
“Of course…” Jorge rolled his eyes.
“So, Jorge.” Cadance snickered once more. “Who’s your friend, here?”
Shadow slowly stood up, shaking his head as he tried to clear the fuzziness from tripping into Cadance. “I’m Shadow...Twilight’s fiancé...nice to meet you.”
“Oh!” Cadance gasped. “You’re Twilight’s fiancé? I can’t believe I didn’t recognize you! Hi!”
“But, you’ve never seen him before…” Jorge commented.
“No. But Twilight did give a description of what he looked like.” Cadance added.
“Right.” Jorge nodded.
“Well. I was going to ask what you two were doing here, but now it’s obvious you two are just waiting for the big event, huh?”
“You probably would have recognized me...had I not tripped and fell into you…” Shadow commented.
“Oh. Don’t worry about it.” Cadance smiled warmly. “You’re just nervous, that’s all.”
Jorge watched as the two began to talk about the big day, which only added fuel to all of his own burning thoughts. He thought back to a year ago, remembering a mention of a gift from Cadance. He waited for a pause in their conversation, that way he could politely cut in without making himself look like a total retard and/or douchebag on his best friend’s big day.
Soon enough, he found one. “So, uh. Cadance… I, uh, I’m curious. Is that offer for that gift you mentioned a long time ago still available?”
“Huh?” Cadance blinked, then quickly shook her head. “Oh. Yeah. Um… Are you sure?”
“As sure as I’ll ever be, I guess…” Jorge scratched the back of his head. “I still need to go grab something else later today…”
As he was finishing his sentence, he had already noticed Cadance’s horn glowing, he raised an eyebrow, looking around to see if anything was levitating closer to them, or if she was creating an object out of thin air. But, to both Jorge and Shadow’s surprise, nothing happened.
“There ya go.” Cadance winked. “Have fun!”
Jorge blinked, trying to figure out what Cadance just did, he almost spoke up to ask what she did, but decided it would be rude to do so. “Uh, thanks?”
“Mhm!” Cadance hummed with a nod, returning back to her conversation with Shadow.
“So...I’m kind of curious, how long did it take for you to find out that Twilight was dating someone?” Shadow inquired.
“Honestly?” Cadance “Twilight seemed to mention she was dating someone every now and then in her letters, but, those mentions were so few in between, that it almost didn’t seem to matter until this day.”
“So. Basically…” Jorge decided to throw in his two cents. “Twilight was pretty much shy about talking about her relationship.”
“I suppose so.” Cadance shrugged. “That’s Twilight for ya.”
“Cadance!” Shining shouted. “We forgot to pick up that gif—” He immediately cut himself off once he ran into their room, finding the soon-to-be groom in that same room. “Uh… That thing, from that place, from that place with the thing.”
”Way to play it smooth, Shining…”
“Oh! Right!” Cadance bounced as she remembered the thing. “I’m on my way!”
Jorge and Shadow watched as she quickly ran off, but before she could successfully leave the room, one of them shouted.
“Wait! Cadance!” Jorge spoke up, catching the alicorn’s attention.
Cadance stopped in her tracks and looked back at the human. “Yeah?”
“Uh. Just out of curiosity… Is there a good place here in Canterlot that sells rings?”
“Yeah, actually.” Cadance nodded. “There’s this really nice place not too far from here, they even do custom made rings and such. Though, those are really expensive.”
“How expensive we talking, here?”
“Oh… Uh, a few hundred bits.”
“Define a ‘few’”.
“A good seven hundred bits. Maybe more.”
“Welp.” Jorge deadpanned, immediately looking over to his best friend, patting him on the back. “Heyyyy—”
“I’m fucking broke, Jorge.”
“But you’re gonna be a prince soon!”
“Holy shit.” Shadow blinked. “I completely forgot about that…”
“But, if you bring any of the materials you want to add onto the ring, you’ll get a discount on it.”
Jorge snapped his head over to Cadance. “How big of a discount?”
“Depends on what you can bring. If you can bring everything even the gold to make the base of the ring, it’s almost free, besides a crafting charge, but that’s a good 20 bits.”
“Sold.” Jorge stated. “Where do I sign?”
Cadance giggled. “Don’t ask me, you gotta go over there yourself and figure it out. Now, I gotta go.” She immediately returned back to her quest for the thing.
“Hey! Shieldbutt!”
Shining stepped in place, stopping his near-sprint to look over to the room, surprisingly, it wasn’t Jorge who called out to him, instead, it was Shadow.
“Y’know, I’d very much prefer a sword…”
Shining simply narrowed his eyes, and returned to his journey for the thing.
As Shadow continued his self-lead tour around the castle, he ended up walking into Celestia’s room, as he walked, in he noticed her phoenix. Jorge followed him in, and hit a banana, held by a thin string, at just the right height for it to hit his face.
“What the f…” Jorge cut himself off, examining the object he had bumped into. He then grabbed the banana, and ripped it from it’s string, and looked up at the smiling alicorn with a deadpan expression. “Seriously, Sunbutt? Seriously…?”
“Huh…?” Shadow blinked, confused as he turned around to see Jorge holding a banana, ”Where did that come from…?”
He then looked up and noticed Celestia just before she fell down to the ground laughing uncontrollably.
“I’ve b-been waiting here for sooooo long for you to show up.” she barely managed to breathe out while laughing.
Shadow facehoofed the confused expression off his face whilst Jorge just glared at Celestia.
“This is never going to get old for you, is it…?” Jorge sighed.
“Nope! Never!” Celestia exclaimed, still laughing uncontrollably. Albeit not as strong as when she started.
Jorge simply groaned, then began to peel the banana. “Welp. Might as well not let this go to waste, then…” he added as he took a bite.
“So… Celestia.” Shadow pestered.
“Hm?”
“Can I have a sword?”
“Hmmm...” Celestia placed a hoof on her chin. “Lemme think abou—No.”
“But whyyy?”
“No.”
“Bu—”
“No.”
Shadow opened his mouth, about to attempt to argue his point once more, but was instantly cut off. “No.”
“Welp.” Jorge cut in. “I’m just gonna let you do… Whatever it is you two are currently doing…” He turned around. “Thanks for the banana, sunbutt.”
“Anytime, beast.”
The cuban simply nodded, and made his way out of the room, only for Luna to immediately block his path, he jerked his head back at the sudden intrusion, stepped out of the way for the Princess of the Night to walk through, then made his way out the door once she was through.
“Heyyy Luna!” Shadow exclaimed.
“Don’t you even dare ask her.” Celestia deadpanned.
“Could I… perchance... have a sw—”
“No!” Celestia interrupted.
“What are you two talking about…?” Luna asked, looking at the stallion before her. She began eyeing him, having never met the stallion before. But, then, she went wide-eyed upon seeing something significant. Something that had reminded her of her recent nightmares.
His cutie mark.
“‘TIA! Stand back! He is a follower of Nightmare Moon!” Luna shouted, jumping in between Shadow and Celestia, her horn instantly charging brightly. ”Hence from mine sister thou foul creature!” she shouted in her Royal Canterlot voice.
“Luna! What are you doing?! That’s Twilight’s fiancé!” Celestia yelled to her sister.
Luna blinked. “Wha…?” Her horn quickly faded back to normal. “My apologies… I… thought you were someone else…”
Shadow opened his eyes, slowly standing up again from cowering on the ground. “Uh...It’s alright Luna…”
Celestia walked over to her sister, placing a hoof onto her back. “Are you alright, Luna?”
“Yeah…” Luna sighed sharply, attempting to calm down from her moment. “He looked… quite similar to the one in my dream…”
“It’s fine…” Celestia patted her back. “It was just a misunderstanding… Shadow would never side with that nightmare…”
Shadow walked up to Luna, “I… don’t know what’s going on… but, it’s okay… I’d never do anything to hurt you guys...”
“I know... I’m sorry for almost harming you...Shadow.” Luna replied softly.
Shadow just moved closer and embraced Luna with his forehooves in a hug while whispering softly to her, “Don’t worry Luna, I would never aid that nightmare… I promise.”
Shadow broke the hug, looking up at Celestia with a curious look.
“So… What’s with the bananas?”
Pinkie simply nodded at Fluttershy, signalling her to do her job, much like back at Cadance and Shining’s wedding. Fluttershy swiftly moved the baton she carried with her mouth, and the birds quickly began chirping in tune of “Bridal Chorus”. The guards opened the door shortly thereafter, clearing the way for Twilight, accompanied by her father, Night Light, to walk down the aisle. She wore a white dress, which had a cordial trim with the colors of her mane, and a few stars dotted in a few areas in the dress, also matching with the colors of her mane. Where her cutie mark would usually be, the dress had large white flower, centered around a small red gem. And around her middle a large, white bow was tied, which centered on her back. She had also worn gold shoes on all four of her hooves, and her veil was held by tiny gold book shaped earrings.
As she walked by the hundreds of ponies on the sides of the aisle, none of them really mattered as she looked up, seeing all her friends lined up on the left, as well as her mother not too far away, followed by the groom, and his best man to the right.
The groom had also worn something nice, unlike the best man, whom simply wore a black tuxedo tailored by the only one willing to make it, instead, Shadow had worn a silky smooth blue tuxedo, his bowtie was a dark shade of purple, while the ends of his undershirt were in a brighter shade, to match his mane.
Eventually, Twilight had made it all the way to the arch and the music had stopped. Her dad going to sit beside her mom, and soon enough, Celestia spoke.
“Mares and gentlecolts, we are gathered here today to celebrate the union of Princess Twilight Sparkle, and Shadow...just Shadow.” Celestia paused momentarily, gaining a few chuckles from the attendees. “Their commitment for each other has proven to be as strong as their love for one another. Their bond with one another is as strong—”
Jorge had blocked out the sounds of Celestia’s speech, having gotten bored of waiting for the “I dos”, and began looking around at all the attendees, he had noticed Twilight’s parents, standing not too far from the rest of his friends, who were both in tears over their daughter’s big moment. Shining wasn’t that far off from crying, either, he could clearly see the tears trying to form in his eyes, but it was as if he was using all of his strength to make sure he wouldn’t. It wasn’t until Cadance had wrapped her hooves around him when he finally hit his breaking point, and began practically bawling. Almost nearly loud enough to interrupt the wedding entirely.
Before they would call him for the rings, he quickly shook his head, snapping his attention back to the focus point of the event.
Celestia nodded. “Do you, Shadow, do you take Twilight Sparkle, to be your lawfully wedded wife?”
“I do.” Shadow nodded happily.
Celestia looked over to the other end of the arch. “And do you, Princess Twilight Sparkle, take Shadow, to be your lawfully wedded husband?”
Twilight looked over to the stallion, stared at him for a moment, as much as she knew the answer, she had a hard time accepting the reality that the two of them would now be bound to each other. Forever.
Eventually, she mustered the courage to speak.
“I do.”
In an instant, everyone flinched as Shining’s semi-quiet bawling turned into a full-on sobfest, his cries nearly loud enough to penetrate the walls of the castle.
Celestia blinked, then quickly shook her head as she attempted to focus on the main event. “Well. Unless anypony has any objec—”
“I OBJECT!”
Jorge immediately shot his head towards the door, instantly recognizing the voice of the one shouting. He rolled his eyes, crossing his arms as he glared at what was standing at the other end of the room.
Right at the open doors, a shirtless Ishtaba stood there, his shirt dangling over his shoulder, and his arms crossed. “You mother fuckers need to repeat the whole thing. No one fucking told me the wedding was this fucking early!”
“But it’s late afterno…” Jorge sighed, looking over to the groom. “I’ll handle this.”
Shadow raised an eyebrow, eyeing the cuban as he walked up the aisle.
Once Jorge had finally walked up to the asian, he patted his shoulder. “Heyyy, Ish…” He spoke calmly. “I need to show you something…”
“Hm?” Ish raised an eyebrow. “Am I getting paid?”
“Uh. Probably?” Jorge blinked, quickly shaking his head as he returned back to reality. “Just, c’mere.”
In an instant, Ish found himself being pushed by his cuban friend, who, on the way out, Jorge reached out next to the door, and grabbed a conveniently placed baseball bat, ready for whacking unsuspecting Ishtabas.
And then, the doors closed.
”So, Jorge. What is it you need to show me?”
”...Jorge? What are you doing…?”
”WAIT JORGE NO!”
”JORGE NO!”
*THUMP!*
Everyone in the room had flinched at the sudden sound, the majority of the attendees looked back at the doors, while others merely stood wide-eyed, not even daring to look back.
After a small moment of silence, the doors had opened once more, revealing a calm and collected Jorge, casually walking back down the aisle, with the guards closing the door behind him. The entire room was flooded with complete silence as the human made his way back to his best friend’s side.
“You placed that bat there, didn’t you?” Shadow whispered, raising an eyebrow.
“Of course I did.” Jorge nodded. “I had to plan something for the wedding.”
“Good job.”
Jorge casually looked back at Celestia, who was still staring at him as much as everyone in the room was.
“You may proceed.” He stated, casually not caring about the fact Ish had just ruined the moment.
“Err... Yes...” Celestia nodded, trying to return back to her original train of thought. “Unless… anypony has any objections…” She glared back at the doors, half-expecting something else to burst through them once more. Then quickly shook her head as she returned back to her job. “Speak now, or forever hold your peace.”
If anyone truly had any objections, they had completely forgotten, as they were all still overwhelmed over the event that just occurred not too long ago.
Celestia nodded, taking the silence as a hint to continue. “Very well.” She looked over to the best man. “May I have the rings, please?”
Jorge simply nodded, turning around as he grabbed a fancy pillow which carried both of their rings, and proceeded to hand it over to Celestia, whom had used her magic to carry the both of them up into the air.
Shadow received a nudge from Celestia, hinting at him to unfold one of his wings, luckily, he took the hint and both he and Twilight had lifted one of their wings, and the rings had both maneuvered into their primary feathers.
“I now pronounce you… mare and colt!”
“They ran out of the thing from that one place...so... I couldn’t get you that gift.” sighed Cadance, “So instead, Shining and I decided to reserve you two the fanciest place in The Crystal Kingdom for your honeymoon.”
“Wow...Thanks, Cadance...That’s very kind of you...” Shadow smiled, quickly looking over to his new brother-in-law. “So… Shining… about that sw—”
“No.” Celestia interrupted, walking past the two of them as she casually went to do something else.
Shadow deadpanned at the alicorn mare. “God fucking dammit. Fine, I’ll just ask Lu—”
“No you won’t.” Celestia interrupted once more, walking past them again, this time in the opposite direction, and a banana casually floating next to her as she tried to hold a smirk.
Shadow simply blinked, wondering what Celestia had in store for that poor, defenceless banana.
“She’s real determined on not letting me having a sword, isn’t she?” He raised an eyebrow.
Everyone around him, including his wife, simply nodded at the stallion’s question.
“Yep.” Shadow sighed in defeat, but then quickly looked over to Celestia, who wasn’t paying attention, then quickly shifted his view to Cadance. “Cadance! Sister-in-law! Do you think, by any chance… I could have a sw—”
“FOR FUCK SAKE, CELESTIA! WE’RE AT A FUCKING WEDDING!”
“BUT YOUR REACTION IS SO FUNNY EVERY TIME!”
“...I give up.” Shadow groaned, his hoof practically beating his face as it met its new home once again.
Meanwhile, back at the center of the party, Dash and Celestia both laughed as they watched a cuban in it’s not-so-natural habitat; pissed off in the middle of a party.
Before things escalated to a point he’d regret, he sighed, trying to relax himself back to normal, which worked for the most part, if Celestia hadn’t kept staring at him with a weird, obnoxious smile.
He deadpanned at the alicorn princess. “Like what you see? Because I can show you a lot more if—”
“NOPE.” Celestia immediately shouted, half-running away from the human as he began to chuckle at her reaction.
“I suppose that’s one way of getting rid of her…” He spoke through his chuckling.
“Aww. I was enjoying seeing Celestia bother you to death!” Dash whined.
“Yeah, well. After a few times, you start getting tired of bananas.” Jorge shrugged, looking at the banana in his hand, and immediately handing it over to his marefriend. “Here, you have a go.”
“What am I supposed to do with this?” Dash raised an eyebrow, glaring at the banana in his hand.
“I dunno, you could either eat it, throw it away… beat up a princess with it…”
“What?”
“What?” Jorge blinked. “Do whatever ya want, it doesn’t really matter.”
Dash looked at the banana in his hand, shrugged, then proceeded to peel it.
Jorge looked away, deciding to see what everyone else was up to. Twilight and Shadow were still talking with the rest of the family, so bugging him was a no-go. He looked over to the DJ, being the familiar Vinyl Scratch, and while he was tempted to request a song, there was a large problem with that.
He’s not familiar with any of the songs Equestria has.
He decided to look as his marefriend once more, wondering what she was planning on doing with that banana, but, the minute he looked at her, she jumped up, and stuffed the banana into his mouth.
And she bursted into laughter after she did.
She watched as her human give her his best/worst death stare, which failed to work, with the banana still stuffed in his mouth. Knowing he can’t simply just spit it out, being in front of quite a lot of ponies. So, he came up with a plan.
He grabbed the mare from all her laughing, and pulled her into a kiss, catching the mare by surprise, at first, she stirred around in his grasp, but then quickly gave up, and wrapped her hooves around him. She hummed softly as they both showed their affection for each other, however, Jorge pulled back, breaking the kiss sooner than she had hoped.
But at that very moment, him breaking the kiss so soon had meant nearly nothing.
Because now, she had half a banana in her mouth.
She narrowed her eyes at the human, who simply smiled sheepishly as he quickly finished off the half in his own mouth. Reluctantly, she swallowed her half of the banana, and spoke with a growl.
“If we weren’t in front of so many ponies, you’d so be dead right now.”
“I love you too, Dashie.” Jorge kept his smile, leaning in for a quick peck, further teasing the mare in his grasp.
Dash groaned at the human’s annoying, yet playful attitude. Which only got him to chuckle a bit the more irritated she got. It wasn’t until he looked off in the distance at… something… that his chuckle died. Eventually, she noticed her lover was slowly placing her back down onto the floor.
“I’ll be right back, Dashie…” Jorge told her. “I just have something I need to do real quick…”
Dash blinked. “Oh. Uh, okay…”
Jorge simply nodded, and walked off to a nearby exit, where Rarity stood, waiting for him.
“Right. So… That ring you wanted me to get?” She raised an eyebrow. “It’s done, darling.”
“To be fair, you were the one who wanted to order it. I only gave you the details for how I wanted it to lo—wait, it’s done?”
Rarity nodded with a hum, her horn immediately glowing in her blue aura, causing a small box to float over to his hands.
Jorge slowly opened the box, gawking at it’s contents, he instantly shut it, and looked up at the fashionista once more. “Where’s the second part of it?”
“Relax, I told the ringmaker to have both parts in separate boxes, that way you could surprise her when the moment came.”
Jorge looked back down at the box, sighing deeply as he knew what to do from here. “Alright…”
“Are you sure you want to do this? Now?”
“Not now.” Jorge shook his head. “But, yeah. I just have something I need to do…” He looked back at Shadow, whom continued his conversation with Twilight and the rest of her family.
“...It really is a great honeymoon place, it literally has everything. Shining and I went there for ours.” Cadance beamed.
Shadow nodded in agreement. “I even heard they have poolside service and—”
“Heyyyy Shadow…” Jorge spoke up from behind, nearly scaring Shadow to death. “Mind if I… uh… borrow your wife for a second…?”
Shadow blinked. “Uh… Sure...?”
“‘Kay, thanks.” Jorge nodded, immediately tugging at Twilight’s hoof. The mare he tugged gave him an odd stare, but he persisted regardless, soon enough, she had gotten up, and was practically dragged out to the exit, which only struck Shadow’s curiosity even more.
“If he does anything stupid he’s all yours, Shining.”
“Deal.” Shining smirked evilly, quickly earning a nudge from his wife.
“Oh yeah, make sure his meals consist of bananas though, they’re his favourite if you couldn’t tell.” Shadow added.
“Noted.”
As everyone waited for Twilight’s return, they looked back to the center of the party, watching as friends, family, even Luna were either dancing, talking, or doing something.
Except, there was somepony missing…
Somepony very important…
In an instant, Shining went wide-eyed as he heard a whisper, and watched as a banana was slowly being placed on the table.
“The Price is Rice.”
Shining jerked his head back, seeing a grinning Celestia behind him. She started giggling at the stallion’s instant deadpan expression.
“I heard a certain somepony wasn’t a fan of ‘The Price is Rice’. So I decided I should do something to fix that.” She explained. “Your reactions aren’t as funny as the beast’s, however.”
“Noted…” Shining muttered as he narrowed his eyes, drawing his attention back to the party.
Not long after, the doors opened once more as Twilight walked back into the party, a smile plastered on her face, and it was obvious there was some sort of… spring, in her step.
Shadow looked over to his wife, practically skipping back to her seat before she sat.
“You seem happy.” Shadow chuckled.
“Of course.” Twilight smiled. “This has been the most perfect day ever.”
“It has, especially since it was all with the mare I love.”
Not a minute later, the doors opened again, revealing a dark red pegasus stallion, his mane was laid out on the top of his head, with five black-tipped spikes poking out, then spread out to the back of his head and neck, with black-tipped large spikes poking out as well. His tail was a lot smoother and shorter, as it followed a red and black stripe pattern, with a couple of small spikes, poking out from the edges. His eyes were a very light blue, and, despite Shadow’s best efforts, he couldn’t seem to make out the cutie mark all too well.
https://camo.derpicdn.net/2b9f75b7493f1e8e5ceb360cd574bb45d92719ee?url=https%3A%2F%2Flh3.googleusercontent.com%2FXlSK65AsYdrlVD1B0xwlcBd6gDWG6HINjq6QVAx8Jb3Cm-0BwhnF9ImydHXLzGGiPg0A4VCtwo8ke-KrhKWXv-NVdo9GPSpdslEFevb4ETjKu1UeL3xfoKniyT4324b_TA
Shadow raised an eyebrow, nudging his wife with a foreleg. “Who’s that? I don’t recall inviting him here…” He looked back at the stallion, whom was now walking into the actual party. “...Is he with the rest of the residents?”
Twilight shook her head. “Actually, he’s a good friend of mine.”
Shadow simply watched as the stallion made his way over to Rainbow Dash, he narrowed his eyes, trying to figure out the mysterious stallion’s plan.
Dash was trying to figure that out, as well.
“Excuse me, ma’am.” The stallion spoke up, his voice sounding vaguely familiar, though it’s accent was a bit strange and the tone seemed to be too deep to be anyone she knew. “May I have this dance with you?”
“Uh.” Dash blinked. “Have we met before?”
“We may have crossed paths once or twice...” The mysterious stallion shook his head. “But I figured a beautiful mare such as yourself shouldn’t be alone, especially on the dance floor.”
“Mmm, no thanks.” Dash shook her head, glancing around to try and locate Jorge. “I’m already dating someone.”
“Oh?” The red pegasus raised an eyebrow. “Where is the lucky stallion? I’d love to meet him.”
“I’m… not sure…” Dash continued looking around. “He was here not too long ago… And then he kinda just left with Twilight for a moment…”
The stallion looked back at the table, noticing Twilight sitting with the rest of her family.
“Hm.” He hummed. “Twilight seems to have returned. But it appears your date has left.”
Dash looked at the doors, then back at the stallion. “No… He probably just had to use the bathroom or something… He’ll be back. I’m sure of it.”
“Until then, are you sure you wouldn’t mind a dance?”
Dash shook her head. “N-No, s-seriously. I’m good.”
Twilight looked back at her husband with a devious smile. “You wanna know something?”
“Hm?” Shadow looked at the smiling alicorn.
“I hear he happens to be a pretty good friend of yours, too.”
Shadow blinked, immediately turning his head over to the stallion once more.
“Ah well.” The mysterious stallion shrugged, his voice returning to it’s normal state as he pulled a small box from under his ring. “I suppose I’ll just give someone else this ring.”
Shadow tried to focus his vision on the stallion once more, attempting to get a good look at his cutie mark.
“Huh…?” Dash blinked, confused over the stallion’s vague statement, as well as his voice.
Instantly, Shadow was able to make out the mark, which was a box with multiple objects, the handle of a sword, a quill, and a lenny face.
“It can’t be…”
The stallion looked over to Shadow, and winked as he opened the box in front of the mare.
“JORGE!?” Dash and Shadow both had shouted in complete unison. Immediately bringing the attention of everyone in the party, pausing whatever they were doing to look at the red stallion before them.
The stallion chuckled, and looked back over to Rainbow Dash once more.
“It’s about time you recognized me.”
Dash simply stood dumbfoundedly, watching as he proceeded to kneel over, still holding the open box in front of her.
“But… There is still one question I need to ask.”
Shadow immediately jerked his head over to Twilight, whose smile was nearly popping out of her entire face. “You knew, didn’t you?”
“Someone’s gotta cast that spell.” Twilight giggled. “Who better than me?”
Shadow looked back at the two pegasi, overwhelmed by his friend’s choice of actions.
Dash, on the other hand…
Jorge inhaled deeply, and mustered the courage to ask. “Will you—Oof!”
Before Jorge could even finish, Dash had tackled him down, pulling him into possibly the most passionate kiss the two have ever had. She had wrapped her hooves around him, while her lover simply remained wide-eyed, attempting to hold the box, despite being held down on the floor.
Luckily, he had a friend like Shadow to come along and grab the box, holding on to it until the two were done with their moment. The minute the box was out of his grasp, he closed his eyes, wrapped his hooves around her, and pushed back into the kiss.
Eventually, the two had finally broke apart, breathing heavily as they stared at each other.
“So… I guess that’s a yes?” Jorge chuckled sheepishly.
“That’s the kind of response you get when you keep someone waiting that long…” Dash chuckled back.
“We’ve only been dating two years…”
“Only two years…” Dash imitated the stallion in her grasp.
“You’re such an impatient mare.”
“And you’re too patient of a stallion.”
“Only when I want to be…” Jorge smiled, pausing for a moment as he simply stared at her, then immediately shook his head as he remembered something. “You didn’t even look at the ring I got, did you?”
Dash instantly gasped, practically jumping off the stallion as she returned to standing back on all fours. While Jorge rolled to his side, slowly getting up one hoof at a time.
“So, Jorge…” Shadow spoke. “Wings…”
Jorge looked back at his wings, extending them as he got a better look at them, then looked back to Shadow. “Yeah… Is… Is this what it felt like when you first moved around in a new body?”
“Just a little bit.” Shadow nodded. “You’ll get used to it.”
“I’m…” Jorge hesitated. “Not sure if I will…” He then looked over to the box still in Shadow’s hoof. “Ahem.” He cleared his throat. “...The ring?”
Shadow blinked. “Oh! Right...” He gave it over to Jorge, and watched as he opened the box.
Inside the box was, of course, the ring, as much as Dash expected. What she hadn’t expected, however, was to see how many lengths he went to make it as perfect as possible.
The very top center of the ring was a near-perfect recreation of her cutie mark, multiple gems had been cut and arranged in perfect formation to give the lightning bolt its rainbow color, while the cloud was recreated using multiple small diamonds. The entire mark itself was also surrounded in a very thin layer of silver, holding all the gems and diamonds in place. Layered around the top sides of the ring, mostly in proximity of the gem cutie mark, were larger diamonds, with one gap on both sides, both gaps containing a red gem in the shape of what seemed to be the bottom half of a heart.
Dash and Shadow gawked at the ring, looking up to the cuban-turned-pony, whom had a warm, loving smile on his face.
“Jorge…” Dash muttered. “It’s… It’s beautiful...”
“You still have yet to answer my question, Dash…”
Dash looked down to the ring, then back at him again. She closed her eyes, trying to fight back the tears building up, despite her best efforts, her tears were too strong for her to hold back, and they swiftly begun their path down from her eyes, and falling off her face.
”...Yes…”
Jorge raised an eyebrow, still holding on to his loving smile. “Hm? What’d you say?”
”Yes…”
“I still can’t hear you…”
“Yes! Yes, Jorge, Yes!” Dash immediately went in, wrapping her hooves around her now fiancé.
Jorge’s smile grew brighter, as he could now finally give Dash the ring that she waited so long to have. Once Dash had let go, she extended her left wing, allowing him to remove the ring from the box, and slowly put it onto her second base feather.
Once the moment had slowly died down, and Shadow was back in his chair next to her, Twilight decided it was time she added one more event to this already eventful day. She pushed her chair back, and stood from it.
“May I have all your attention for just a moment?” She asked loudly enough for everyone to hear, causing everyone, even Jorge and Dash, to focus on her, even the music stopped for her to do whatever it was she needed to do.
“I… have an announcement to make…”
“I don’t like where this is going…” Jorge spoke worriedly, looking over to Shadow as he raised an eyebrow.
“...I’m pregnant.”
“What!?” exclaimed Shining and Shadow in unison.
“Welp.” Jorge monotoned. “Shit’s gonna hit the fan real quick...”
“Uh...um...when...how...but...what?” Shadow stammered quietly.
“You’re… wha…?” Shining asked dumbfoundedly.
“I’m so happy for you!” Cadance cheered from behind. “I’m gonna be an auntie!”
Gawking, Dash looked over to the stallion next to her, who surprisingly, didn’t seem to react as much as everyone did, he simply closed his eyes.
If only he was still human, his arms would’ve been crossed.
“Heh…” Jorge chuckled, slowly opening his eyes. “...You took your sweet time waiting, didn’t ya?”
Twilight blinked. “You knew?”
Jorge nodded. “You don’t think I haven’t noticed all those times you glanced over to your belly every time you visited me at the hospital?”
“You were awake?”
Jorge rolled his eyes with a knowing smile. “I may have been in bed rest and on a few anesthetics, but I have quite the observative eye.”
In an instant, Dash blinked, raising an eyebrow at her fiancé at his statement. “You haven’t be—”
“I only stare at butts that have rainbow tails attached to them and a specific cutie mark on their sides.”
“Good.”
Twilight blinked. “Uh… Right… So…”
“Um...so...Twilight…Uh… Why did you never tell me until now?” stammered Shadow quieter than usual.
“Uh… Well… I didn’t think you could keep a secret very well…” Twilight smiled sheepishly.
“Well...you’re not wrong...but...how...when were you in heat?” hesitated Shadow, quickly pushing a thought to the back of his mind: “I bet Shining is about to murder my ass.”
“Er… How long…?” Shining cut in.
“Three weeks.” Twilight bluntly stated.
Jorge raised an eyebrow, placing a thinking hoof on his chin. “But… Three weeks ago was…” His eyes immediately shot wide-open.
“...The ‘dat ass’ incident…” Shadow finished Jorge’s thought process, his own eyes widening as well.
“What ‘dat ass’ incident…?” Shining queried, confused and confangled.
“Nothing.” Twilight and Shadow both deadpanned, immediately getting interrupted by an extremely happy Cadance, who had pulled both of them into a just as equally extremely tight hug.
“Congratulations!” She squeed. “I’m so excited!” She immediately let go of Shadow, focusing attention to her sister-in-law. “I’m going to your baby shower.”
Shining instantly narrowed his eyes, immediately aware of Shadow’s lack of attention.
“Shadow…” He spoke through gritted teeth.
Shadow’s eyes shot open once more, slowly turning his head to the stallion who had gone ‘big brother mode’.
“oshi—”
“SHADOWWWW!”
Jorge rolled his eyes, immediately extending his wings. “I guess we’re gonna find out if I know how to use these things or not…”
Dash looked over to him. “What’re you doing?”
“Sh.” Jorge covered her mouth with the tip of his feather. “Wait…”
“SHINING I DIDN’T KN—”
“SHAAAAAADOWWWWWWW!”
“FUCK THIS SHIT, I’M OUT!”
Instantly, Shadow used his wings to bolt out the room, however, his luck decided to screw him over as he found himself caught in a purple aura. He immediately turned his head back, finding the spell to be coming from Shining.
But it’s thanks to friends like Jorge to even out his bad luck, by flying up above Shining, and letting himself fall on top of the stallion, breaking his concentration, his spell, and unlocking from his target to a new one.
Shadow fell onto the floor, the spell now no longer in effect, he looked over to Shining, who currently had to deal with a cuban pony on top of him.
Jorge turned his head back. “FLY, SHADOW, FLY LIKE THE WIND!”
Before Jorge could even process another thought, he was immediately lifted up by Shining’s magic, and practically chucked back where he was.
Luckily for him, before he landed, he was caught by someone else’s magic, and slowly put back down onto the floor.
In fact, two others were affected by the same levitation spell…
Shining and Shadow were lifted up from the floor, looking down in an attempt to see who was casting the spell.
“This can end in two ways.” Twilight deadpanned. “Either you two make up and stop being complete and total idiots in front of everypony in the party, or the hard way.”
Shadow blinked. “What’s the har—”
“Do you really want to know?” Twilight narrowed her eyes at her husband.
“No thanks…”
Twilight sighed, looking up at her older brother. “Shining, Shadow had no clue at the time. In fact…” She chuckled. “I kinda planned the whole thing as I went. It was… uh…”
“You mean to tell me you got pregnant on accident, Twilight?” Jorge monotoned.
“No!” Twilight retorted. “It was a… accident, on purpose.”
“That doesn’t make any sen—”
“I say it does, so shut up.”
Jorge huffed. “Rude…”
Twilight ignored his comment, then looked back up at her brother. “Besides, I’m happy about this. You don’t need to go all ‘big brother’ on him. Believe me, if Shadow did something stupid, I wouldn’t let you do anything about it.”
Shadow sighed a breath of relief. “Thank God…”
“Because I’d be the one doing something about it.”
“...Fuck.”
“So, don’t worry about me so much… Alright?” Twilight smiled warmly. “I can take care of myself.”
Shining paused for a moment, looking up at the stallion levitating in front of him, then back down at Twilight with a sigh. “Alright. But if he hurts you…!”
“Oh just shut up, shieldbutt, and make up, already!” Jorge cut in. “Shadow ain’t gonna do shit!”
”Hey!”
“Fine…” Shining groaned. “I’ll back off.”
“Good.” Twilight’s smile grew slightly wider, slowly canceling out the spell until the two stallions were safely back onto the floor.
Shadow walked up to his wife, slowly placing a hoof onto her belly. His ears flopped back, chuckling sheepishly. “So… I’m a dad now...”
“You’re telling me…” Twilight chuckled back. “...I’m still having a hard time knowing I’m gonna be a mom in eleven months.”
“That’s gonna take some getting use—eleven months?” Shadow took a doubletake.
“Well, yeah. Pregnancies are eleven months long… You didn’t know that?” Twilight raised an eyebrow.
“Back home, they usually last about nine…”
“Really?” Twilight queried, looking over to her cuban friend for verification, who, surprisingly, wasn’t there…
“...Where’d Jorge go?”
“Uh… He and Dash went to a hotel, or something… Something about… trying out his new body?” Applejack raised an eyebrow.
“Welp.” Shadow droned. “They’re definitely not sleeping tonight, especially now tha—”
“Well, that nine month pregnancy isn’t really the case here…” Twilight interrupted, scratching the back of her neck with a hoof. “So… uh… yeah…”
Shadow sighed in defeat. “So… Eleven months of pregnancy?”
“Yep.”
“Great…”
Cadance immediately cut in. “I still can’t believe I’m gonna be an aunt!”
“You’ve said that a dozen times, already…” Shadow deadpanned.
“And I still can’t believe it!”
“...These are gonna be a long eleven months…”
Author's Note
We're finally back! It's been a while, but at least we got it done before 2017! For the next 11 days, expect a new chapter again! We hope you'll enjoy!
P.S: I TOTALLY DID NOT RIP OFF TWILIGHT'S WEDDING DRESS DESIGN OFF OF A CERTAIN PIECE OF ART I TOTALLY DIDN'T FIND ON GOOGLE (http://img01.deviantart.net/96dd/i/2015/111/7/2/twilight_sparkle_the_bride_by_vavacung-d8qilkv.png).
Also, huge thanks to Daszkin (https://www.fimfiction.net/user/Daszkin) for doing the art of the now pony Jorge. Go check out this awesome dude!

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           Chapter 3-2: The Wedding of a Rainbow           
//-------------------------------------------------------//
Chapter 3-2: The Wedding of a Rainbow
Jorge patiently stood in the train station, waiting for the scheduled train to arrive. Although no one was waiting with him, not Rarity, not Pinkie, not even his new fiancée, Rainbow Dash.
While he had been waiting patiently, the scheduled train had… run a bit late. It hadn’t bothered him, though, as was already waiting on something much more important.
Later today, he will be married to the love of his life.
He was glad that Twilight had replied to his letter, and had cut their honeymoon a bit short to be a guest in the wedding, despite the fact they were honeymooning for two weeks now, apparently two weeks wasn’t enough.
The thought of the length of their honeymoon made him wonder about his own.
...And then he thought about his new pony body again.
He tried to look up to see his mane again, but was unable to do so. He groaned, picturing himself based off of his own memory. He didn’t necessarily hate his new body, but rather, found it too… cliché. And by that, it simply reminded him of every red and black OC in the internet.
The thought of those terrible, terrible OCs suddenly made him cringe.
“Yep. I’m dyeing this shit.” Jorge thought aloud, looking back up to his mane. “...Maybe style it a bit too…”
The more time went on, the more he began to think about other things. His soon-to-be wife, his friends, himself. Eventually, he had soon lost himself in thought. Only to be snapped back to reality by the closing sound of the train.
He shook his head, looking back up at the train in front of him, watching as his two friends walked out from it.
“Twilight! Shadow!” He cheered. “Glad to see you two again! Your train was only like…” He looked at a nearby clock hanging on the wall, deadpanned at the time, then turned his head back at them. “...an hour late.”
“Yeah, well they dragged me away before I could finish my snowman.” complained Shadow, groaning.
“It also didn’t help that the train had to make a few pit stops…” Twilight rolled her eyes. “So not only did I have to deal with this one…” She nudged her husband with a foreleg. “But we had to wait constantly cause the train kept having problems…”
“But, all that matters now, is that we’re here, so stop complaining.” Shadow deadpanned.
“B-But I wasn’t compla—”
“You were about to…”
Jorge blinked. “I… actually wasn’t.”
“...Oh..” Shadow blinked as well. “See, I was expecting you to, cause that’s something you normally would do…” He scratched the back of his head. “I’m gone for two weeks and you’ve already stopped complaining for everything, huh?”
Jorge shrugged. “I don’t remember complaining for ‘everything’. But if you say so…”
“Well. Let’s not worry about it too much, today’s your big day, after all!” Twilight cheered.
“Speaking of which…” Shadow came to a realization. “Where is your waifu, Jorge?”
“Uh. She said she had to go check something out. Not entirely su—”
“Jorgie!”
Jorge blinked as he was interrupted, looking behind the newly married couple, only to find another married couple walking up towards them.
Shadow looked back to the older couple, smirking at the stallion as he got closer. “Heya, Shining. We sure kicked those girls’ asses in that snowball fight, eh? I don’t even have magic.” He then proceeded to reach his hoof out, waiting for the stallion to bump it with his own.
“Hell yeah, we did!” He grinned, bumping the other stallion’s hoof with his own. As their wives simply rolled their eyes.
Meanwhile, Jorge was completely left out of the situation. With a blink, he tried to speak.
“You know we let you win, right?” Cadance snickered.
“We didn’t wanna hurt your pride, after all…” Twilight added.
Jorge simply deadpanned as they continued to interrupt him.
“Bullshit you did!” Shadow retorted.
“Keep telling yourself that…” Twilight giggled softly.
“But wouldn’t you jump at a chance to hurt our pride?” Shadow raised an eyebrow.
“Not when you start whining when we do.” Cadance countered.
Meanwhile, Jorge had given up on trying to speak. If he were human, he would’ve crossed his arms. But unfortunately, he could not do so with his new body. Instead, he simply just turned around, and started walking away, leaving the two couples to argue about whatever it was they were arguing about.
“Anyway, why are we still arguing about this?” Twilight asked? “After all it’s…” She looked over to where Jorge had originally stood, only to find said stallion walking away. “Hey!”
Jorge simply ignored the shouting coming his way, only for him to be caught in Twilight’s magical aura. He blinked as he paused his now futile movements, not even bothering to try and fight back.
Twilight pulled Jorge back to the group, then spoke once he was close enough. “We came through all this trouble to show up to your wedding, and this is how you treat us!?”
Jorge simply looked at Shadow with a knowing look, then back at Twilight. “This is your second month in your pregnancy, right?”
“Yeah…”
“Your hormones are already starting to act up.”
Twilight paused for a moment, looking over to her husband, who was attempting to hold his laughter. She blinked, then looked at the still floating Jorge with a deadpan look.
“Yeah?” She raised an eyebrow. “And your cuban-ness is showing.”
“I’m not wearing clothes. Everything’s showing.” Jorge deadpanned back.
Shadow blinked as he realized what Twilight had said. “Do you even know enough about cubans to be making fun of him?”
Twilight paused for a moment, then looked at Shadow. “Shut up.”
Shadow shook his head, slowly covering her back with a wing. “Alright, you need to calm down, boo.”
“But did you not hear what Jo—”
“Do you not realize you’re talking about Jorge?” Shadow cocked his head to the side. “It’s like Jorge and I trying to complain about Ishtaba being completely braindead with everything he does!”
“Hey!” Jorge retorted.
Twilight looked at the cuban, whom was still floating in front of them, then back to her husband. “But… but…”
“Twilight, relax.” Shadow sighed. “The more you try to argue with a cuban, especially one like Jorge, the more you'd be better off talking to a brick wall.”
Jorge simply stayed silent, deciding not to get frustrated and angry on his big day.
Maybe he was better off not inviting them to begin with…
Twilight sighed. “Fair enough, I suppose…”
“Anyway…” Cadance jumped into the conversation. “What are we all doing here talking bad about Jorge on his big day? Shouldn’t we be… I dunno, getting ready?” She then looked up at the floating stallion. “And getting him ready, too? Cause, he doesn’t look ready at all…”
Twilight looked up at the stallion, verifying Cadance’s statement over Jorge’s lack of clothes. “Hm. I suppose so…”
“Woah, woah, woah!” Jorge interrupted the two. “I already have my tuxedo all picked and ready to wear!”
Twilight raised an eyebrow. “...So why aren’t you wearing it?”
“The wedding isn’t for another…” He glanced at the clock again. “...Three hours. I’m not wearing that uncomfortable thing for another three hours.”
“Welp. You are now.” Twilight spoke with a smirk.
Shadow chuckled softly. “Have fun Jorge, at least I don’t have to wear mine for three ho–.”
“You’re the best man, if anything, you gotta help prepare for the wedding, too.” Jorge interrupted.
“Fuck.”
“Alright.” Twilight began walking off, with Cadance promptly following her. “Time to get everyone all dressed up for the big event!”
Jorge, however, simply blankly looked in front of him, realizing he was being pulled along with her. “T-Twilight…? I think you’re forgetting to let me go…”
“No I’m not.”
“Twilight!”
“Ha! Getting forced into wearing yours for a whole three hours. Sucks for you!” Shadow teased, poking his tongue out in a mocking fashion.
Jorge simply narrowed his eyes at the canadian, knowing he would exact his revenge on him. Sooner or later.
Twilight stopped in her tracks, turning around completely. “Oh? Sucks for Jorge, huh?”
Shadow immediately went wide-eyed. “Oh shi—” Before he could say anything else, both he and Shining were wrapped around with both of their wives’ magic.
Turns out, it would be a lot sooner.
Jorge reached a hoof out, doing his best/worst impression of a character from a fighting game, then, with near perfect timing, as Shadow was pulled towards him and the mares, Jorge pulled his hoof back, while shouting in a deep voice. “GET OVER HERE!”
Eventually, the two were brought together into one large magic aura, controlled by Twilight. While Shining was a few inches away, caught in his wife’s magic.
“Why the hell am I stuck in the same-ass bubble as this retard?” Shadow rolled his eyes.
“Remind me, why did I make you the best man, again?” Jorge raised an eyebrow, trying as hard as he could to cross his hooves, but failing miserably.
“Because it was either me, or Ish.”
“Ish is starting to look like the better option, though…”
“Oh, you son of a bitch!” Shadow growled, preparing to attack the cuban with everything he’s got.
Shining blinked as the two fought to the death. “...I’m so glad I’m in my own bubble…”
Jorge stood in front of the wedding cake he had baked (thanks to the two years he had spent under Pinkie’s employ). Normally he would’ve had Pinkie do it, but she was too occupied fixing up the final pieces of the party, so it was better (and easier) if he did it.
While the cake itself wasn’t too special, just a normal triple layered cake, (with the bottom layer being made out of chocolate because… reasons.) he had put more time, focus, and effort into the figurines.
Ever since Dash’s birthday, he had been the one in charge of planning every birthday of hers from then on, which gave him more of a reason to become better at it. Because of this, he couldn’t help but stare at the creation he had made.
Atop of the cake stood the two figurines, painstakingly crafted by hoof (which was harder than by hand…), one of them resembled his fiancée, wearing a tiny recreation of the ring he had custom made for her on it’s folded wing. It had a soft, warm smile on it’s face, as it leaned its head forward, resting against the other’s head.
The other figurine, however, lacked a lot of details. While it was detailed enough as Dash’s in terms of having an actual face with it’s own, happy expression, as well as its head leaning against the other’s. But what was the most noticeable thing missing was the figurine’s mane, which was completely non-existent. And while the tail itself was there, it lacked color, leaving it just a pure white re-creation of his tail.
Jorge looked at his figurine again, remembering his plans to style and dye his mane, but never had a chance to get around to it. With a groan, he knew he’d have to go find Shadow soon before the wedding actually started.
“Hey… Uh, Jorge?”
Jorge’s ear twitched at the sudden call for him, turning around to find the voice’s owner.
“Dashie!” He smiled, walking over to her, and quickly leaning closer for a quick kiss. “I was just checking on everything to see if everything was actually in place, and stuff…”
Dash looked around the room, finding tables set around the room, as well as a couple of seats around them, an empty area (which she assumed was the dance floor), and the main table for the couple and their families. As well as the cake in front of her.
“Well…” She spoke softly. “Looks like Pinkie did a good job setting everything up.”
“Mhm.” Jorge nodded. “I had to argue with her about party cannons, again…”
Dash laughed at her fiancé’s statement. “I’m not surprised. You two are always arguing about party cannons every year…”
“I don’t know how many times I have to tell her I’m the one in charge of your birthdays, now…”
“Were you in charge of setting up the wedding, too?”
“Half in charge. It was the only way I could get Pinkie to help me without giving her full credit.”
“Of course…” Dash rolled her eyes. “I like how you’re already used to this, though...”
“When you work for Pinkie for two years… You start to be able tolerate Pinkie’s…”
“Randomness?” Dash raised an eyebrow.
“Pinkieness.” Jorge corrected.
“Heh…” Dash chuckled. “Can’t argue there…”
“I don’t think anyone can, at this point…” Jorge chuckled back, smiling softly as the two shared their conversation.
As the conversation slowly started to die down, Dash had quickly began to remember the reason why she had come here. She slowly walked up to him, and began resting her head on his neck, which Jorge understood was the pony equivalent of hugging.
He still prefered wrapping his hooves around her, whenever he could without tripping like an idiot.
“Jorge…?” Dash muttered, a hint of uncertainty, and nervousness cracking through her voice.
“Hm?” Jorge hummed softly, resting his head on her neck.
“Remember that thing I went to go check…?”
“Mhm.” Jorge hummed. “Why?” He pulled his head back softly, attempting to look at her face to face. “Is something wrong?”
“A-Actually, I’m fine…” Dash spoke shakingly. “G-Great! To be honest…”
“Uh-huh.” Jorge deadpanned. “Then… Why are you shaking so much?”
“W-Well…” Dash scratched the back of her neck. “I, uh… I visited the hospital earlier…”
Jorge raised an eyebrow. “I… don’t like where this is going…”
“Nononono!” Dash speedily shouted. “It’s good news, trust me!”
Jorge sat down, his eyebrow still raised. “I’m listening…”
“So, uh, I didn’t feel all too great earlier today… When you left, I had to grab the bucket.”
“I’m not seeing how this is good new—”
“Let me finish!”
Jorge shrugged. “Alright…”
“So, I decided to make a rush for the hospital, hoping it wasn’t anything serious…” Dash explained. “I had a checkup, blah blah blah… In the end, they told me what I was dealing with earlier was perfectly normal… Because my body’s trying to get used to… uh… You ready?”
“As ready as I’ll ever be, I guess.” Jorge shrugged.
Dash took a deep breath, sighed, then spoke once more. “My body’s trying to get used to...our foal.”
In an instant, Jorge was hit with a sudden rush of emotions and reactions. So much so, that it all blended together into one, blank, emotionless face.
At the same time, Dash had noticed a certain pink alicorn quickly running up to the pair, having overheard the conversation.
Cadance quickly lowered her muzzle over to his ear, and whispered.
“You’re welcomeeee~...”
As if the look on his face wasn’t blank enough, his pupils had completely shrunken at Cadance’s whisper, his ears flopped completely to their sides, and the rest of his face somehow became… even more blank than it was before.
Never in his life had he blanked so hard.
Cadance slowly moved her head from his ear, trying to get a better look at the stallion’s reaction. Upon realizing how motionless he had been for the past half minute, she raised a hoof, and waved it in front of his face, gaining no reaction whatsoever.
Then, she looked at Dash, who had her eyebrow raised in both confusion for Cadance’s sudden appearance, and worry for Jorge’s reaction.
“I think we broke him.” Cadance deadpanned.
Dash simply blinked, trying to understand why Cadance was even here. She was about to say something, even made it as far as opening her mouth, but Cadance interrupted.
“Don’t worry, I won’t tell anypony.” She winked.
Dash looked at her still motionless fiancé, then back at Cadance.
“...Did I miss something?” She raised an eyebrow.
Cadance raised an eyebrow. “What makes you say that?”
“Well, for starters… You broke him!”
“I did not!” Cadance retorted. “It was a collaborative effort!”
As the two continued to argue, Shadow poked his head through the door, having been sent on a mission to find Cadance by his brother-in-law. Upon finding the arguing pair, he raised an eyebrow, debating whether or not he should step into the conversation or not.
Eventually, he figured it was pointless to debate. He needed to step in.
“Do I even wanna know what’s going on?”
Both of the mares immediately ended their argument, interrupting themselves from anything they were saying. They looked off to the entrance to the room where Shadow stood, looked back at each other, then back at Shadow.
“No.” They both spoke in unison.
“Well that’s too bad.” Shadow monotoned, walking up to the pair (with a frozen Jorge still nearby). “Cause I’m butting in anyway.”
Once he had gotten closer to the mares, he had noticed his cuban friend idly sitting by.
“Oh hi, Jorge.” Shadow spoke, having not realized his current state just yet, until he had gotten face to face. “What are yo—…”
Then, a wave of silence had ran over Shadow, as he watched the cuban react in a way that he recognized.
“Wow. I haven’t seen Jorge blank this hard since…” He commented, pausing for a moment as he tried to recall. “‘Kay, nevermind. I haven’t seen Jorge blank this hard.”
Dash’s hoof clashed onto her face. “I had everything just right…”
“You mean he wasn’t like that before I said anything?”
“Not as bad as this!” Dash pointed at Jorge’s expressionless, motionless face, to make her point.
“...Oh.” Cadance blinked. “...Maybe I did break him…”
Shadow deadpanned at the two. “Seriously? I’m tempted not to ask what you two did, but I’m going to anyway… What did you two do?”
“I told Jorge something.” Dash narrowed her eyes. “That’s all you need to know.”
“And… uh… I told him something too.” Cadance scratched the back of her head. “It wasn’t anything serious like what Rainbow had told him… But, uh… It still broke him.”
Shadow narrowed his eyes. “Good fucking job. I don’t care what Dash said, cause that’s hers and Jorge’s problem, and I don’t mess with his cuban shit. But you are my sister-in-law. And Shining asked me to find you.”
“What for?” Cadance raised an eyebrow.
“I don’t fuckin’ know.” Shadow shrugged. “You expected me to know that kind of shit? All I know is that he asked me to find you, and when I did, to do something.”
“And that was…?”
Shadow walked up to her, doing the pony equivalent of a hug once more, resting his head on her neck. Cadance raised an eyebrow at the stallion’s actions. Only for Shadow to reach out a foreleg, and push her forelegs, causing her to fall forwards onto her face. While she was down, Shadow grabbed a doughnut he had… somewhere. And stuffed it onto her horn, leaving the doughnut completely on her head, with the horn going right through the hole.
“‘Kay I lied, Shining didn’t tell me to do that...But he still told me to find you.”
Cadance looked up at the canadian, her eyes narrowed as she stared daggers at him.
Honestly, if Shadow didn’t know any better, he could easily assume she was trying to shoot lasers out of her eyes. Wait. She’s an alicorn… She probably could shoot lasers out of her eyes…
“Annnd that’s a thing I like to call ‘brotherly love’.” He added, a soft smirk forming on his face. Soon enough, he began to notice Cadance was still trying to shoot lasers. He took that as a sign that he should run away before he’s blasted into the sun.
Knowing Celestia, she’d probably let her.
“Y’know… I think now’s a good time to…” He quickly turned around to face Jorge, hardcore bitch slapped him with his wing. “‘Kay now that that’s done…”
If he would’ve looked back, he might’ve been able to see the flames starting in Cadance’s eyes. “SHADOW!”
“I’M OUT!” Shadow shouted, flaring his wings completely open, then flying full speed out the room.
“YOU’RE NOT GETTING AWAY THAT EASILY!”
In an instant, the two had already flown out of the room, leaving Jorge and Dash alone once again.
Dash simply blinked. She wanted to understand what had just happened, she really did. But, the more she tried to wrap her head around the events, the more confused she had gotten.
Then, she heard a groan, snapping her out of her train of thought. She looked over to the previously frozen stallion, who was now slowly getting up, and rubbing his cheek.
Jorge looked at the door where Shadow had fled the room, then looked back at Dash.
“Y’know what?” He spoke. “As much as I’d love to beat the shit out of Shadow, I’m pretty sure Cadance is already doing that for me even as we speak…
“...Were you pretending to be frozen?” Dash raised an eyebrow.
“Uh, kinda.” Jorge responded. “It was half an actual reaction, and the other half pretending to be frozen for long enough to bore Cadance away, Shadow made it easier on me.” He immediately shook his head as he quickly began to focus on something else. “But, right now… I have more important things to think about… Like… our foal…”
Dash nodded with a hum. “I’m still freaking out about it too…”
Jorge scratched the back of his neck, sighing deeply the more he thought about it. “So I guess that means…”
“Yeah…” Dash chuckled. “We’re gonna be parents…”
Jorge walked up to her, resting his head on her neck. “As long as you’re happy, Dash. I’m happy…”
Dash rested her head on his neck. “Honestly… I’m feeling so many things right now…”
“I can imagine…” Jorge shrugged, then quickly pulled his head back. “Though, one thing I don’t get… Your cycle wasn’t for another month, wasn’t it?”
Dash blinked. “Actually… now that you mention it…”
Suddenly, a wave of realization washed over Jorge. His eyes widening as he recalled a certain ‘gift’ he had received from Cadance.
Then, he narrowed his eyes, and looked back at the door where both Shadow and Cadance had fled the room.
“That bitch.”
Shadow zoomed past several buildings throughout Ponyville, in a desperate attempt to escape from Cadance’s wrath. He quickly looked behind him, only to see that the still pissed alicorn wasn’t as far away as he had hoped she was. Despite all his quick turns, loops, and everything else he had done in an attempt to lose her, she was still hot on his tail.
Eventually, he found himself in front of the apartment building that holds Ish’s apartment. Where, coincidentally, Ish had been doing something outside. He had made the quickest, hardest stop he could pull off without crashing into something.
“ISH!” He shouted. “YOU GOTTA HELP ME!”
Ish paused for a moment. “That depends. Am I getting paid?”
“THERE’S NO TIME FOR DEALS!”
Ish crossed his arms. “NIGGA. THERE’S ALWAYS TIME FOR A DEAL!”
Shadow looked back, his eyes widening to the size of basketballs as Cadance drew closer.
“FINE. GUESS WE’RE DOIN’ THIS THE HARD WAY!”
“Wait wha—” Before Ish could say anything else, Shadow had grabbed him, and did his best to practically chuck him right at Cadance.
“THE FUCKS YOUR PROBLEM!?”
The human was somehow the perfect thing to use to slow down Cadance, as he had made a collision course straight for her. The two had fallen down onto the ground, giving Shadow enough time to make his hasty retreat.
Cadance lifted her head up. “If you thought that was going to stop me you’re so wrong!”
But then, she had noticed that, unfortunately, Shadow had completely vanished from the area.
“Oh… He’s gonna get it…”
As loud, booming sounds was heard coming from the other side of the castle doors, Shining raised an eyebrow, walking up to the doors that he didn’t even know were locked.
Upon cracking open one of the doors, Shining peeked his head through to see Shadow hovering there.
“BRO, YOU GOTTA HELP ME!”
Shining’s eyebrow went up a little higher. “With…?”
“Uh… Just let me in, close the door, maybe a protection spell here or there… y’know… Normal brotherly things…”
Shining blinked. “Who’d you piss off?”
Shadow sighed. “Well... you see...I uh—”
“SHADOOOOW!” Cadance shouted from many feet away, her voice still managing to reach far enough for Shadow to even hear her. “THERE YOU ARE YOU LITTLE SHIT!”
Shadow flinched as he saw the fires of hell burning in her eyes, looking back to Shining, he pleaded, “Bro, just please open the door enough for me to slip by then protection spell it. PLEASE!”
Shining looked at his raging wife, then back at Shadow.
“I warned you not to piss her off—”
“JUST LET ME IN DAMMIT!”
“Yeah, well. It looks like you’ve gone overboard on this one… You’re on your own, bro.” Shining replied, quickly poking his head back into the castle, and closing the door afterwards, locking it once more.
“BUT THIS IS MY CASTLE, YOU BITCH!” Shadow shouted, banging on the door, then quickly having a thought. He turned his head back, noticing a certain alicorn right behind him, steam flaring out of her nostrils. Shadow flinched slightly, cringing as he tried to step back, only to bump into the door, leaving him stuck between a rock and a painful place. “Oh… Hiya… Cadance…”
Meanwhile, inside the castle, Shining had heard hoofsteps coming closer to him. He turned around, finding his sister behind him.
“What was that about?” Twilight asked, tilting her head to the side.
Shining chuckled. “Oh, nothing… Someone decided to get on Cadance’s bad side...”
Twilight chuckled back. “Hah, I feel bad for the poor soul who decided to do that.”
“Oh, I think he’s feeling bad for himself, too…”
“Alright!” Shadow shouted off in the distance, limping as fast as he could through the door as he tried to make it to his friend’s side. “I’m here! Finally!”
Jorge’s eyes widened, he immediately rushed over to his friend, helping him walk up to the aisle where he was supposed to be. “The hell happened to you?”
Shadow looked back at the seats, only to find a beaming Cadance, then looked back at Jorge. “I learned about this thing called ‘Sisterly Love’...”
Jorge raised an eyebrow, looking in the same direction in where he looked, upon noticing the overly happy alicorn, he looked back at Shadow with a knowing look.
“That’s kinda your own fault for pissing her off…”
“Who’s side are you on, again?”
“Whichever side gets this started already…”
“So, you’re on my side then.”
“Yeah.” Jorge nodded.
Shadow looked at a noticeable change in Jorge’s mane. “Hey… When’d you get your mane dyed?”
“When you were getting your ass kicked…”
“Ohh…” Shadow blinked. “Well, it looks nice.”
Now that everyone was ready, the ceremony had begun. As the pianist had began to play the bridal chorus, the doors slowly opened, making way for the flower girls, being the Cutie Mark Crusaders, and right behind them, was Rainbow Dash, wearing her wedding dress. Her mane was loose, similar to how she had it when wearing her gala dress, though around the end, it was braided around. Her tail was styled similarly, close to the start, and close to the end, her tail was also braided around. Her overall wardrobe was similar to her previous gala dress, she even re-used the same laurel around her ears, but with a veil that fell down to the base of her neck attached to them. The dress itself, while basic, was pure white, held up at her back by another laurel. It had a recreation of her cutie mark pinned to the front, as well gold shoes on her hooves, with the front shoes having a laurel wrap halfway around the shoe, and straps that wrapped around higher up on each leg. And one small strip coming from the tail end of her dress, and wrapping around her tail.
Once the flower girls were out of the way, she looked over to her father, who stood next to her, ready to walk with her. He grabbed her hoof, as he slowly walked her down the aisle, until she had finally made it all the way to the groom. By then, he had let her go, and joined his wife’s side.
Dash looked over to her fiancé, noticing a few changes about him. While his tail was still the same, all the red on it had been dyed a dark blue, while his mane had received a noticeable restyle. While he didn’t exactly hate the spikes his mane had, he still felt like he should change it up a bit. His mane was a bit more smoother, the top of his mane was left untouched, however, towards the back, it had been brushed to lay on the back of his neck, instead of going completely wild and making large spikes from the side of his neck. The way it was colored was altered as well, as it had received the same treatment as his tail; All of the red had been dyed the same shade of blue.
While Shadow had re-used his tuxedo from his wedding, Jorge wasn’t going to use the same one he wore that day. So, he pulled a Shadow, sporting a near-blackish blue tuxedo, a black bowtie, while the ends of his undershirt were blue, matching his mane.
Shadow simply rolled his eyes over the fact Jorge had stolen his idea.
“Mares, and Gentlecolts…” Celestia spoke, who was asked by both Dash and Jorge to be the one who would marry them, without any trolling. Reluctantly, she agreed not to troll them. “We are gathered here today…”
Shadow zoned out Celestia’s boring speech, disappointed that there would not be any trolling done by her. As he glanced around the room, he noticed everyone paying close attention...except for Cadance who was still giving him that innocent smile. He tried to ignore her but ended up just looking right over her head as he zoned out into his own mind. Arguing with himself.
“Holy shit… why did Cadance have to be so rough?”
He looked down at his hoof, remembering the pain as it instantly began as his hoof started to throb the more he remembered how much pain he had to deal with. “God damn, it hurts like shit…”
Then, a thought passed through his head. “Maybe she broke it…”
He looked back at Celestia, who was still giving her long winded speech about Jorge and Dash. Something about love and shit, he didn’t really pay attention much.
“Damn, how much longer is this gonna take? I wanna complain to Cadance about her breaking my goddamn hoof…”
The more he thought about Cadance and the pain he went through, the more he began to remember something. He glared over at Shining, who was focused on not crying like a little bitch.
“Man… Shining was such a dick for not letting me into my own fucking castle…”
“...I can’t really blame him though, I would’ve done the same…”
Then, he winced as his hoof began to throb once more, reminding him of the pain.
“God damn, this hurts like hell… It’s gotta be broken, there’s no way it’d be hurting this much if it wasn’t broken…”
Eventually, he figured he was better off trying to focus on the wedding, maybe that would help him ignore the pain for a little bit.
“Do you, Rainbow Dash take this stallion, to be your lawfully wedded husband?”
Dash nodded softly. “I do…”
Celestia nodded, then looked over to the groom. “And do you, Jorge, take this bana—” She blinked, looking over to a banana she had involuntarily levitated nearby, and deadpanned. She quickly chucked the banana off in the distance, then shook her head. “Nobody saw that…”
She ignored the soft chuckles and laughs from the guests, and looked back at Jorge. “Do you, Jorge, take this mare, to be your lawfully wedded wife?”
Jorge nodded. “I do.”
Celestia nodded once more. “Then… Unless anypony has any obje—” She paused, glancing at the door, simply waiting for a certain asian to burst through the door again.
Jorge and Dash both turned their heads, looking at the door as they, too, waited for Ish to burst through the doors.
Though, to their surprise, that didn’t happen. The three of them shrugged, then returned back to the ceremony.
“Unless anypony has any obectio—”
“I OBJECT!”
Shadow snapped his head to the door, immediately knowing exactly who was there, in a fit of rage. “GODDAMNIT!”
Jorge simply looked over to Pinkie, who was standing right next to Twilight, and nodded.
Pinkie took the signal, grabbed a device from her dress, and pushed the only button on it.
Ish had stood in front of the door, shirtless once again, this time, not even bringing the shirt he was gonna wear with him. “YOU BASTARDS GOTTA DO IT ALL OVER AGAIN! YOU ALWAYS PICK THE WORST TIMES TO HAVE YOUR GODDAMN WEDDINGS! IF IT WEREN’T FOR SHADOW CHUCKING ME LIKE A FOOTBALL, I MIGHT’VE BEEN ABLE TO MAKE IT ON TIME!”
“Wait for it…” Jorge extended a foreleg in front of Shadow, blocking him from going after him.
“SO LET’S GO BITCHES! ROLL IT BA—”
*POP*
In an instant, a cannon cleverly hidden below Ish had gone off, strings of confetti flying all over him, while the actual blast itself had merely obliterated his pants, leaving him only in his underwear.
Ish looked down, noticing his sudden lack of pants, then looked back up at Jorge with the most dumbfounded look ever. “I need an adult...”
“Huh.” Jorge blinked. “That didn’t go as we planned…”
“I got this.” Shadow started to say as he limped up the aisle.
“Ha!” Ish pointed at Shadow. “That’s what you get for throwing me at that pink horse!”
Shadow simply nodded once he was close enough to Ish. He then turned to his left to find Lyra sitting in a chair nearby, he limped over to her, and whispered into her ear.
“Heyyy, Lyra… Could you go and distract Ish for me?” He asked.
Suddenly, a large, yet slightly creepy grin grew on her face. “Oh… I’ll distract him, alright…”
Shadow blinked. “‘Kay, whatever floats your boat.”
Lyra immediately jumped from her seat, making a one-way trip for Ish, immediately tackling him down onto the floor, but just far enough for Shadow to close the door, and lock them out of the room.
“Fuck...” was all that could be heard before the doors locked on Ish and Lyra.
Shadow then turned back around and limped back up to his place beside Jorge, however this time his wife noticed his limping, and was about to go help him but something else caught her attention. The chatter and looks going on between Shining and Cadance, and the smile Cadance had on her face. Twilight made a mental note to have a talk with Cadance later.
Once Shadow was back in his place, he gave a nod to Celestia, telling her to proceed.
“Unless anypony has any objections…” Celestia paused, glancing at the door, expecting Ish to pop through again, but when he didn’t she continued, “Speak now, or forever hold your peace.” If anyone had had any objections they had all been wiped from their minds by Ish once more.
Celestia nodded, taking the silence, minus the sounds of struggle outside the doors, as a hint to continue. “Very well.” She looked over to the best man. “May I have the rings, please?”
Shadow nodded, bringing a rainbow colored laced pillow into view for Celestia to grab with her magic, which she did, floating it and the ring pieces up into the air.
While Jorge’s ring was a simple wedding ring, Dash’s ring was revealed to be an add-on to her engagement ring, although slightly skinnier. Just like the engagement ring, there were two red gems, shaped like the top half of a heart, as well as a few diamond layered around to match the pattern of it’s bottom half.
The rings were gently levitated onto their base feathers, Jorge’s just fitting perfectly, while Dash’s ring had clicked onto it’s new add-on, completing the entire ring. Dash looked up to him with a surprised look, only to receive a smile out of him, causing her to smile back.
“I now pronounce you… mare and colt!” Celestia said energetically, “Now you may kiss the bride!”
As music was being played in the background, DJ’ed by Vinyl Scratch of course, Jorge walked around the room, where ponies had been dancing, chatting, and overall enjoying the reception party.
Eventually, he made it back to the little area where the couple and their families would sit and chat. Despite it only seating Dash’s family, since Jorge’s was in another world, but it was fine.
At least he met Dash’s family before he even decided to propose, unlike Shadow. Jorge tried to wonder why Shadow would just yolo it the way he did, sure, he’s fine now, but—
“Jorge!” He was quickly snapped out of his thought, having been called by Dash’s mother, Firefly. “C’moooooon, sit with us! Talk to your new mom and dad-in-laws!”
Jorge raised an eyebrow, chuckling as he got closer to his seat, sitting down once he was close enough. “What do you mean talk with my new mom and dad-in-laws? You’ve been treating me like a son the second we met!”
“So?” Firefly raised an eyebrow back. “Now I can really say you’re my son...in-law!”
Jorge rolled his eyes with a smile, causing the group to laugh softly as the moment slowly began to die down.
“So, Dashie told us what you did for your proposal.” Firefly stated. “That was really romantic of you, Jorge.”
“Yeah, well…” Jorge scratched the back of his head. “I couldn’t think of any better way to do it.”
“I… just have one question, though.”
“Hm?” Jorge cocked his head to the side. “What’s that?”
“If you’re a pony now… Doesn’t that mean you two could end up having foals later?”
Dash blinked, immediately looking over to Jorge with a nervous look. Jorge noticed her look, and shrugged. “I mean… It’s certainly possible now… I-I just don’t—”
“Fire, leave them be.” Dash’s father, Rainbow Blaze, had cut in. “Whenever they’re ready to have a foal, they’ll settle down. They just got married, for Celestia’s sake!”
Jorge and Dash looked at each other, nervously chuckling at Blaze’s statement, but, luckily, their nervous chuckles didn’t draw any attention from Dash’s parents.
Meanwhile, Shadow had limped over to the dessert table and grabbed another jelly doughnut. He hoofed it up to his mouth but stopped right before taking a bite when he noticed Cadance talking to Shining with her back facing him. Shadow slowly limped up behind her and flared his wings. Right when he was about to take flight and dunk the jelly doughnut on her horn, Shining looked past her with an eyebrow raised, causing Cadance to turn around, the flames of “sisterly love” reigniting in her eyes.
Shadow slowly folded his wings back to his sides, limping backwards away from her as she stared him down. He slowly turned around, limping back towards the dessert table. Glancing behind him as he went to make sure Cadance wasn’t about to fire “sisterly love” lasers up his flank. Looking back to the table, he saw the piles of bananas that Celestia had brought to the wedding.
“Who to troll… who to troll…?” Shadow thought to himself as he began glancing around the reception. As he noticed Luna off in the distance, a sudden, yet fabulous, idea came to mind. And had immediately started sticking banana slices into the doughnut to make a crown.
Jorge raised an eyebrow, noticing the canadian and his strange doughnut banana crown. He whispered into Dash’s ear, letting her know he would be back in a few minutes, then softly kissed her cheek. Once he had received a nod of approval from Dash, he got up, and walked over to Shadow.
“Do I even want to know what you’re doing?” He asked.
Shadow paused as he was sticking the final banana into the doughnut, and looked up at his cuban friend. “Oh hi, Jorge! I didn’t notice you there!”
“No, seriously, do I want to know?”
“Uh…” Shadow looked down at his near-completed masterpiece, then back up at Jorge. “Yes. Because it may involve you.”
Jorge rolled his eyes with a smile, knowing that Shadow had something planned. “Alright. Who we trolling?”
“Luna.”
“Pfft.” Jorge scoffed. “Been there, done that.”
Shadow blinked. “Seriously?”
“I never told you that story?” Jorge asked curiously.
Shadow shook his head. “No… I don’t think you did.”
“Oh.” Jorge blinked. “Well, it was hilarious.”
“You’re gonna have to tell me one of these days, then.” Shadow looked down, jabbing the final banana into the doughnut. “Mind helping me troll her?”
“Depends on what we’re doin’ here.” Jorge replied.
“I just need you to distract her for a bit, then, while she’s not paying attention, I’ll take her crow—”
“Been there, done that.” Jorge interrupted. “What I really want to know is what you’re planning on doing with that doughnut.”
“Well, maybe if you’d shuddap, you would know.” Shadow retorted.
“Alright. I’m listening.”
Shadow sighed, then continued his explanation. “When she’s not paying attention, I’ll take her crown, and put this…” He grabbed the doughnut carefully, showing off his new masterpiece. “...Where her crown would normally be.”
“Ah. So the ol’ switcheroo…” Jorge nodded slowly, pondering on whether or not he’d help out or not.
“So.” Shadow spoke. “What’s it gonna take for yo—”
“I’m in.”
“What?” Shadow blinked. “You’re not gonna make me bribe you or anything?”
“Nope.” Jorge shook his head. “Sounds like a good prank, and I legitimately want in.”
Shadow paused for a moment, then nodded in agreement. “Alright, then. The replacement crown’s done, all you gotta do is distract Luna.”
Jorge looked behind him, watching as Celestia and Luna watched as Twilight was on the dance floor, failing incredibly. He looked back at Shadow, and began doing his best/worst impression of George Lopez. “I GOT THIIIS.”
Before Shadow could even say anything, he watched as his friend began walking backwards towards the Princesses, whatever it was he was doing, Shadow could only hope it wouldn’t backfire on him.
Without looking back, Jorge kept walking backwards, more and more, until he had bumped into Luna. Causing both of them to immediately turn around.
“Oh! Luna! Sorry about that!” He smiled sheepishly. “I was just—”
“Beast!” Luna cheered. “I’ve been looking for you!”
“You have?” Jorge raised an eyebrow. “I’ve been over there with Dash’s family… How didn’t you notice me there?”
Luna shrugged. “I didn’t really look much.”
“Of course…” Jorge deadpanned. “If you were looking for me, you found me now. What’s up?”
“I was told to give this to you…” Luna explained, as a larger than normal banana slowly began floating from behind her. “...I’m not entirely sure why, but I didn’t see much of a problem doing so.”
Jorge narrowed his eyes. “By any chance… Was the pony who asked you to do so just happen to be your sister standing right next to you?”
“Huh?” Luna looked at the pony next to her, noticing it indeed was her sister. “Why, yes. Yes it was.”
“Hm?” Celestia turned around, only for Jorge to mentally facepalm the second he saw her wearing Groucho Marx Glasses.
“What the actual fuck…” He muttered under his breath.
“Beaaaast!” Celestia cheered. “What’re you doing here?”
“It’s my reception party…?”
“No, I mean, like, here. Near the dancefloor.” Celestia explained. “Shouldn’t you be over with your wife?”
“What, am I suddenly tied to a leash that’s held by Dash all the time, now?” Jorge raised an eyebrow. “Can’t a stallion walk around his own reception party withou—” He glanced up, noticing the switch was already done and Shadow was nowhere to be found. “...Where’d Luna’s crown go?”
“What?” Luna and Celestia looked up to the aforementioned crown, in an instant, Celestia had immediately fallen on the floor, laughing at Luna’s new “crown”. While Luna herself was still confused over it entirely.
“TIAAAA!” She shouted at her sister. “WHAT’D YOU DO TO MY CROWN!?”
“I had… No part… In whatever just happened!” Celestia said in between laughs, unable to stop laughing every time she looked up at Luna’s head.
Celestia’s laughter was loud enough to grab Cadance’s attention, she raised an eyebrow, wondering what could have her aunt laughing that much, only for her to start laughing herself once she saw Luna’s new “crown”. Albeit, her laughter wasn’t nearly as loud or overly dramatic as Celestia’s but was still noticeable for her husband. “Oh...Shadow’s gonna get what’s coming to him now…”
As soon as Luna ran off to find her crown, Jorge thought to himself, “Y'know, I wonder how far Shadow planned this little prank of his… Cause I don't think Luna’s gonna let him get away with this…”
But, shortly afterwards, he lost interest, and returned back to his waifu.
Shadow now found himself sat in a room with one big window, which was open for phase 3 of his plan, waiting for Luna to walk in. Which happened just as he sat himself down. Speaking up and catching Luna’s attention, he said. “Oh hey, Luna. What happens to bring you away from the reception...and why is there a doughnut crown on your horn?
Luna raised an eyebrow. “Would you enlighten me to thine purpose in having my crown upon thy head…?”
Shadow placed a thinking hoof on his chin. “Well, I liked it, so I took it. I think it looks quite well on me.”
Luna blinked. “But it’s my crown, designed to fit upon my head. Not to mention it’s more of a tiara, than anything…”
“Well, then I think your tiara looks fabulous on my head.” Shadow retorted. “But I should be heading back to the reception now…” He salutes with a smile, backing out into the window, and falling out the building.
Before Shadow could do any damage to her tiara, Luna quickly caught it from his head with her magic, sighing softly as she began to calm down while it was still in her grasp.
But then, Shadow flew back up, and grabbed it. “Oops, forgot this…”
And then he fell again.
“So you just happen to show him some ‘sisterly love’, hm?” Twilight raised an eyebrow.
“In my defence…” Cadance retorted. “He was asking for it.”
“You have magic.” Twilight pointed out, poking her horn with a hoof. “You could’ve just cast any spell you wanted, but instead you decide to injure him? The father of your future niece or nephew?”
“Oh, please, the foal won’t be born for another ten months, more or less…” Cadance rolled her eyes. “It’s not like he’s still gonna be hurting by then.”
“That still doesn’t mean you can hurt him!”
Shining slowly walked up to the arguing pair, throwing in his two cents. “As much as I don’t want to butt in on your little argument… Couldn’t one of you just use a healing spell, or something?”
Twilight blinked, quickly looking over to her brother. “I mean… Yeah, I could… But just ‘cause we can heal him doesn’t give Cadance any privilege to hurt him!”
“So it’s perfectly fine for him to knock me over and land on my face?”
“There are so many ways to counter for that, and the best possible option was to beat him up?”
Cadance paused for a moment. “Well… No…” She shook her head. “It was the only amusing option, though.”
“‘Kay, from now on, the only one hurting Shadow will be me.” Twilight stated. “Alright?”
“Alright. Fine…” Cadance rolled her eyes.
As their conversation slowly began to die down, Shadow had come flying at an incredible speed, stopping right in front of his wife.
“Twilight!” He spoke loudly. “You gotta hide me!”
Twilight blinked. “Hide you? What do you mean hi—” She paused, noticing Luna’s crown on his head, with a raised eyebrow, she spoke again. “...What’re you doing with Luna’s crown?”
“Uh.” Shadow looked around. “I pulled a Jorge.”
“Explain.” Twilight narrowed her eyes, her hoof tapping on the ground impatiently.
“Twi, babe, as much as I’d love to talk about how I’m pranking Luna, I really don’t have that much time…”
“So what am I supposed to do?” Twilight asked curiously.
“I dunno… Isn’t there some sort of invisibility spell, or something?”
“Well, yea—”
“Cast it.”
Twilight shrugged. “Alright.” With a roll of her eyes, her horn began to glow, covering Shadow in it’s light, and slowly, as seconds began to pass, the spell had begun to take it’s effect, making him completely unseen to everyone.
“Go nuts.” She added, hoping he had heard her last statement.
“As long as I don’t get raped, I’ll be fine.” Shadow replied. “Thanks, Twi.” He added, softly pecking her lips, while being invisible.
“You’re welcome…” She spoke again, wondering if he was even close enough to hear her at this point.
Though, from the lack of an acknowledgement, she assumed he had already gone off to hide somewhere.
Meanwhile, back at the conversation held by Dash, her husband, and her family…
“So, Jorge…” Blaze spoke up. “Now that you’re a pegasus and all… How’s your flying coming along?”
Jorge shrugged. “Coming along well, I suppose…”
“I assume Dash has been showing you the ropes, eh?”
“Actually, I’ve just been practicing the basics on my own.” Jorge shook his head. “I think I’m doing pretty well.”
Blaze and Firefly look over to their daughter, who smiled and nodded in confirmation.
“It’s true.” Dash commented. “Honestly, I thought I would have to teach him the core basics, but he’s been doing pretty well all on his own.”
“You were expecting me to fail, or something?” Jorge raised an eyebrow at his wife.
“Just a tiny bit.” Dash sheepishly smiled.
Jorge’s face began to scrunch. “Rude.”
As he quickly tried to butt out of the conversation, in an attempt to get them to talk about something else that wasn’t him, he looked down at the table, noticing his spoon had begun to move around on its own.
“Huh…?” He reached over to the spoon, ready to poke it and see if it would continue to move.
”Though, I may not have taught Jorge everything he needed to know about flying. There was one stallion I taught everything I could...”
Right before Jorge’s hoof even came into contact with the spoon, it’s slow and steady movements turned into one quick jerk move, right off the table and right onto the floor below.
Dash blinked, interrupting her speech as she looked over to Jorge.
Jorge looked back at her with wide eyes. “Uh… My bad.” He pointed to the spoon on the floor. “...I dropped my spoon.”
“Again?” Dash raised an eyebrow.
“I’m not used to these hooves! Cut me some slack!”
Dash chuckled at her husband’s retort. “It’s fine. ” She then focused back to her conversation with her parents. “Anyways…”
With a shrug, Jorge drew his attention back to the spoon, getting off of his chair, and investigating it.
Only for him to get pulled under the table entirely, his mouth covered by what felt like a hoof, but there was no visible hoof in sight.
“Don’t freak out.” Jorge heard a familiar voice speak. “It’s just me, Shadow.”
Jorge raised an eyebrow, feeling the hoof against his mouth pull away.
“Shadow?” He muttered. “Why are you invisible…?”
“I had Twilight cast a spell so I could have time to hide from Luna…” Shadow explained. “I figured the best place to hide for now was under your little table, here…”
“How long does the spell last?”
“Not sure... Few minutes, maybe?”
“So then… Why drag me down here?” Jorge asked.
“I dunno.” Shadow shrugged, despite Jorge not being able to see him. “Kinda wanted someone to talk to.”
Jorge narrowed his eyes. “Seriously?”
“What?” Shadow raised an invisible eyebrow. “Can’t a guy come to his best friend just for a chat?”
“Not when said guy is invisible!” Jorge countered, still remaining quiet as they were both under the table.
“It’ll wear off soon!” Shadow retorted. “Geez…”
Jorge looked back at the seats, remembering his wife and her family, then looked back at where he assumed Shadow was sitting.
“Yeah, well. My wife’s up there, talking with her family.” He deadpanned, pausing for a moment as he had a thought. “...Which, now, is also my family. But you get what I mean!” He huffed. “So, I need to be spending time with them, after all, I just got married, and all…”
“You’re right, go visit your family, I’ll find a new hiding spot.” Shadow nodded to himself, as he walked out from under the table, tickling Dash’s rear leg with his tail as he did.
As Jorge quickly returned back up to the table (with the fallen spoon in his grasp), Dash looked at him with a raised eyebrow.
“What were you doing down there?” She asked. “I felt something brush my leg…”
“Huh?” Jorge blinked. “Uh, I was looking for the spoon.”
“It took you that long to find it?”
“Uh. Kinda…”
Dash narrowed her eyes. “What were you really doing down there?”
“Uhh…” Jorge’s eyes looked around nervously, only for Dash to grab his face with her hooves, forcing him to focus on her. “...Staring at your beautiful tail?”
Dash kept her expression, continuously eyeing him in an attempt to crack out some truth to his story, only to have him smile sheepishly.
With a giggle, Dash softened her grip on her husband, pecking him gently on the lips as he began to calm down. She slowly brought her muzzle to his ear, and with a devious smile, she whispered.
“Don’t you do enough of that in bed?”
Meanwhile, Luna had finally made her way back to the reception, looking around for the stallion who stole her tiara, but she was, unfortunately, unable to find him.
So, she quickly shifted her target to the next best thing; his wife.
With almost no trouble at all, she was able to find Twilight, not too far away, still talking to Cadance. She walked up to her, immediately interrupting their conversation.
“Pardon my interruption, Twilight...” She spoke. “But I can’t seem to find your husband, have you seen him?”
Twilight looked around her, checking for her husband, but to no avail. “He was here a while ago…”
Luna sighed, rolling her eyes at the lack of Shadow’s return. “Alright then. Thank you anyways.”
She turned around, walking away in anger. She continued looking around for the tiara thief, but still to no avail. Eventually, minutes had passed, and Luna had given up on her search.
Until she walked up to a table, with her tiara sitting right on top of it, and a note right next to it.
She grabbed the note with a hoof, bringing it closer to read it better.
“Plsdontkillme ~Shadow”
Luna looked up from the note with a deadpan expression, and over to her tiara.
Shrugging, she levitated the tiara back to her head with her magic. Now content with just having her crown back.
Dash looked over to her husband, scooting her seat closer to his, allowing her to rest her head against him.
Jorge looked to his sudden cuddly wife, kissing her head softly. Causing her to look up with a smile.
“Hey… Jorge…?” She muttered.
“Hm?” Jorge hummed.
Dash looked down at her stomach, then back up to him. “We’re gonna have to tell everypony sooner or later…” She stated. “Cause this…” She poked her belly to emphasize her sentence. “...is just gonna get bigger until the foal’s born…”
Jorge cocked his head to the side. “What do you think we should do, then?”
“I think we should announce it. Here. Right now.”
Jorge paused for a moment, took a deep breath, and sighed. “If that’s what you wanna do, Dashie, then go for it. I’ll be right here with you.”
Dash nodded softly, removing her head off of him, and slowly standing up from her seat.
“Attention, everypony!”
Instantly, everyone had stopped whatever they were doing, and looked over to her. Even the spell that took effect on Shadow had worn off, creating the illusion that he had teleported right next to his wife.
Jorge immediately got up as well, standing right next to her. Dash looked over to him, smiling warmly as he supported her with her plan.
She looked back at the guests. “Jorge and I were talking about how we were going to do this. But we decided it was best to announce it here…”
She took a deep breath, grabbed Jorge’s hoof as she looked over to him, and exhaled. Then slowly looked back at the guests.
“I’m pregnant.”
“I still can’t believe they did the same thing we did at our wedding!” Shadow huffed, storming inside of the castle.
“I thought it was sweet move they did…” Twilight giggled, closing the door behind her. “They both looked nervous just standing up before they made the announcement.”
Shadow paused, then sighed. “Yeah, I guess you’re right.” He commented. “Y’know, I’m actually happy for the little bastard. He found someone who loves him, and now, he’s got family on the way…”
“So do you, Shadow.” Twilight added.
“Yeah. But I wasn’t expecting that kind of thing to happen to Jorge.” Shadow countered. “So, at least he’s happy.”
“Mhm.” Twilight nodded. “Glad to hear you’re happy for him.”
Shadow nodded back. “Now, if you’ll excuse me… I have a letter to write.”
“To who?”
“Dear Princess Sunbu—Celestia,
Not used to formalities...
Today I learned a thing about ‘sisterly love’. It hurts like a bitch. It hurt so much that I think my hoof’s broken, now. Still need to get that checked out...
So, I’ve learned not to piss off my sister-in-law, A.K.A, Princess Cadance, and I suggest you don’t piss off your sister. Because you may feel some ‘sisterly love’, too.
With regards, Shadow.
P.S: Jorge is a bitch. Oh and for his birthday, send him a banana at least three times his size.”
Author's Note
Let Arc 3 officially begin!
And I totally didn't rip off this design (https://mlpforums.com/uploads/post_images/img-2718219-1-437485__safe_solo_rainbow%20dash_alternate%20hairstyle_wedding%20dress_rainbow%20dash%20always%20dresses%20in%20style_artist-colon-kumkrum.png).
...Please don't murder or sue me... ;-;

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              Chapter 3-3: Ice Cream Thieves               
//-------------------------------------------------------//
Chapter 3-3: Ice Cream Thieves
Shadow walked around the castle, wandering around as he knew his wife was resting in bed for the past hour. He began looking around the rooms, finding quite a few extra rooms he hadn’t noticed before, which he and Twilight had designated to be guest rooms, in case they decided to throw a sleepover, or in case one of their friends needed a place to stay for a bit.
This was the longest amount of peace he’d seen in the castle so far. Jorge had been out doing things for Dash and her pregnancy before she hits her craving phase, which Twilight had now reached. Fortunately for him though, she was currently asleep. Ish had been doing his own thing, no one even knows what, but then again, no one cared.
But his moment of peace ended sooner than he had wanted, as he immediately heard his wife shout for him a few rooms away.
“WHO ATE THE LAST OF MY ICE CREAM!?”
Shadow blinked, immediately finding a way to prevent his ass from being accused. “I BLAME SPIKE!”
Off in the distance, he could hear Spike shouting back at them. “WHAT!? I HAVEN’T EVEN TOUCHED THE DARN PAIL SINCE YOU GUYS BOUGHT IT!”
In an instant, Shadow knew he was in for Twilight’s wrath. And not the good kind that leads to apology sex.
...Then again, that’s how he got himself in this mess in the first place…
“SHADOOOOOOOOOOW!”
Shadow turned around, quickly noticing his wife right behind him. Doing the best he can to calm himself, he smiled at her lovingly, walking up to her as he tried to soften her mood. “Yes babe~?”
Twilight had noticed Shadow’s calm and loving mood, which had somehow slowly began to calm her down. She took a deep breath, and sighed. “Shadie…” She spoke in a soft, yet whining tone. “Could you go get some groceries for me…?” She threw in a soft, childish, yet adorable smile that Shadow couldn’t resist.
Shadow rubbed the back of his neck with a hoof. “Well…”
Twilight began looking at him with her biggest attempt at making puppy eyes, pouting her lip as much as she could, as well as blinking rapidly every now and then to add to the effect, all she needed was one final piece to pull him into her trap.
“Pweaaaaaase?”
Shadow watched as his wife began to pull a move he knew all too well since they’ve gotten married. It was a trick she’d pull every time she wanted him to do something. He’d always try to resist against her attack, but, with a face like that, how could he say no?
“Sure… What do you need, babe?”
“I still can’t believe I fell for Twilight’s trap… again…” Shadow grumbled, walking by different aisles of the store, going over the dramatically long list that Twilight had gave to him.
With every aisle he passed, he looked at his list to make sure nothing he needed was in each passing aisle. With some aisles marked down as a mental note to pass through later, and others just ignored due to not having what he needed.
But right now, he was heading straight for an aisle that had the two most important things that Twilight threw on her list.
Cake. And Ice Cream.
The second he stepped hoof in the aisle, he quickly began searching for the very specific cake that Twilight mentioned in her list. 100% hay flour, octuple berry cake topped with daffodils.
Once Shadow had found the cake he was sent to hunt down, he made a straight path directly to the ice cream hidden in the freezer behind him. While Twilight asked for such a specific cake, when he had asked what ice cream she wanted, she simply told him to get vanilla.
As much as he tried, he could never seem to understand his wife’s cravings…
He opened the door, grabbing a pail of vanilla ice cream, shoving it in the shopping cart in front of him. He then reached in the door, grabbing another pail of vanilla ice cream specifically for him and Spike alone. He closed the freezer door, preparing to go on his way for the rest of the items in Twilight’s list.
Once the door had been shut, he prepared to turn around, only to find a certain red stallion digging in the freezer door next to his.
“Ugh. I can never find the cookie-dough flavored one…” The stallion muttered to himself, sounding irritated over his inability to find what he wanted.
Shadow looked over to the door he just closed, seeing the aforementioned ice cream through the glass. “It’s… in this one.” He replied, pointing at the door.
The stallion pulled his head back a bit, pausing for a moment before he would take a step back, and look over in Shadow’s direction.
Shadow immediately recognized the stallion to be Jorge, who was now looking at him, and then the freezer he had pulled the vanilla ice cream from.
“Oh.” Jorge blinked. “They must’ve moved it, then…”
“Yep…” Shadow simply said, watching as his friend closed the freezer door he was still holding, and reaching for the other one as he attempted to dig for the flavor he had been searching for.
As he watched Jorge finally find the ice cream he was looking for, Shadow decided to speak up. “So, what brings you here, Jorge?”
Jorge pulled his cart closer, placing the ice cream down in it. “Funny, I was gonna ask you the same thing.”
“Twilight’s goddamn cravings...” Shadow groaned. “You?”
“There’s a marathon of a show and Dash and I are gonna watch it.” Jorge smiled softly. “She wanted me to grab some snacks, but I wanted to pass by here real quick cause I’ve been craving some cookie dough ice cream…”
“So. I’m here for my wife’s cravings. And you’re here for your own.”
Jorge pondered Shadow’s statement for a moment, then nodded. “Yeah, basically.”
Shadow deadpanned. “Good job.”
“Welp.” Jorge grabbed his cart. “I gotta go grab some other stuff.”
“Oh.” Shadow nodded slowly. “Yeah, alright. See ya, Jorge.”
Jorge simply narrowed his eyes, but then quickly shrugged it off, and continued on his way.
Shadow simply shrugged back, grabbing hold of Twilight’s list once more. “Now… What else is on the list…?”
He skimmed through most of Twilight’s list, noticing items such as pickles, chips, and whipped cream.
“...I will never understand pregnancy cravings…”
An hour earlier...
“BLUUUUURGH!”
Jorge patiently rubbed his wife’s back with a hoof as he sat beside her, sighing deeply as he tried to soothe her as she emptied the contents of her stomach into the toilet. As well as trying not to get sick from watching and listening…
“Happy thoughts, Jorge…” He thought to himself. “Happy thoughts…”
Soon enough, her morning sickness had finally subsided, and her upset stomach was no more. Dash lifted her head slowly, pausing for a moment as she waited to see if her morning sickness would strike again.
But then, she felt her husband wrap a wing around her, attempting to pull her into a hug. She slowly gave in, leaning her side against him as he began to wrap his foreleg around her as much as he could, she pressed the side of her head against the crook of his neck, groaning softly as her stomach continued to rumble and stir.
She felt him lean down slightly, moving his head closer to hers as he gently kissed the crown of her head, she then whimpered quietly as he began caressing her back with his foreleg. She closed her eyes, relaxing her body as she rested against him while he soothed her from her morning sickness.
“Jorge…?” She spoke gently, gathering a hum from her stallion. “I love you…”
Jorge did a mix of a chuckle and a hum at the same time. “I love you too, babe…”
The two stayed like that for a while, Jorge continued to caress his wife while she simply rested against him, it was moments like these that showed how much they cared for each other. Jorge could only wonder if Shadow ever had moments like this with Twilight, but, then again… It wasn’t really his business to butt in on their relationship…
After a while, Dash gently moved her head up, turning her head upwards to face her lover’s. She smiled weakly, still held in his embrace. She then moved her muzzle closer to his, reaching over to show her affection for him, only for her to get completely blocked by his other wing.
“Dashie, as much as I love you and all…” Jorge snickered. “But after everything you just unloaded into the toilet, you need to wash your mouth…”
Dash grumbled, pushing his wing out of the way as she pushed her head against his neck once more. She closed her eyes again, not wanting to leave his embrace just yet.
Jorge smiled warmly, leaning closer to her and leaving a gentle kiss on her cheek. He watched as she opened her eyes, smiling back as she looked at him.
“C’mon, Dashie…” He muttered. “Let’s get you outta here…”
Dash whimpered as she felt him prepare to stand up. “I don’t wannaaa~...”
“Dash, c’mon…” Jorge murmured. “We’ll get you onto the couch, I’ll even carry you there… How’s that sound?”
“I guess…” Dash sighed. “But only if you carry me…”
“Done.” Jorge nodded slowly. “But first, we’re gonna wash your mouth… Alright?”
Dash nodded back. “Okay…”
Sighing contently, Dash adjusted her head more comfortably against her husband, whom rested on the couch with her. Her stomach had calmed down considerably, yet she still felt weak and woozy, though the past ten or so minutes she had cuddled there with Jorge did much to improve how she felt.
To add to their moment, Jorge slowly began to reach his muzzle closer to hers, pressing his lips against hers as they continued to cuddle. Soon enough, they found themselves making out on the couch, with Dash slowly pinning him down onto his back, allowing her to rest on top of him while they made out.
The two slowly ended their kiss, opening their eyes to see one another. They smiled softly, merely gazing at each other as time passed. Though once Dash had grown tired, she scooted a bit down, allowing her to rest her head on his chest. The couple stayed like this for what felt like an hour, spending time with each other while Dash tried to rest and adjust to her pregnancy.
Soon, Dash lifted her head up, feeling something small suddenly laying down on her back. She looked back, finding a certain white chihuahua with its noticeable brown spots on its face.
“Back off, Linda.” Dash grumbled, holding her husband tighter. “This is my stallion.”
Linda simply ignored the mare’s comment, inching closer to her face, and softly licking her cheek. Causing the mare to giggle at the sensations.
Jorge looked around, wondering where Tank could be. Only to find him wandering around, doing his own thing. He shrugged, and returned his focus back to his wife, who was still trying to defend herself against Linda’s attack of doggy kisses.
Dash had already reached to the point where she even covered her face with her wings, blocking the dog from her attacks, but even that failed to prove useless, as Linda would always find a certain area she failed to shield, and exploit it for her attack.
Jorge simply laughed as he watched Linda continued her onslaught of attacks, which Dash had been proving to be terrible at blocking. He knew not to try to take anyone’s side, for the other would retaliate against him. Either way, why would he want to ruin this adorable scene?
Soon, Dash was able to find the perfect defence against Linda’s assault, Dash scooted upwards again, burying her muzzle between Jorge’s neck and the couch, blocking whatever left that was vulnerable with her foreleg.
Her defences had succeeded, as Linda tried to find a vulnerable spot, but only went as far as poking her foreleg with her cold, wet nose. Once she had realized she lost, she immediately shifted her target over to the next best thing.
Jorge.
The stallion knew exactly what the dog was planning, and immediately blocked her first attack with his wing.
“Not this time, Linda.” He chuckled. “I think you’ve had enough fun for now…”
The dog simply pouted softly, her ears flopping back, and her wagging tail stopping as her target denied her game.
Jorge looked back over to Tank. “Why don’t you go play with Tank? I’m sure there’s something you two could do…”
She looked over at the same direction, immediately raising her ears and wagging her tail as she now focused on her new target. She swiftly jumped off the couch, racing towards the tortoise.
Dash slowly lifted her head up, checking if her attacker had finally left. Once she noticed that Linda was indeed gone, she uncovered her head, and removed her head from her hiding place entirely.
“Whew…” She sighed. “She’s gone…”
“You two had quite the battle, eh?” Jorge chided, raising an eyebrow.
“Shuddap…” Dash nudged him with a hoof. “You weren’t even helping me!”
“I wasn’t gonna get involved in your battle!” Jorge retorted. “Linda would’ve attacked both of us if I did!”
“Whatever…” Dash groaned, extending her wing as she tried to reach for the TV remote on the table in front of the couch. “Let’s just watch some TV…”
With a push of the button, the television turned on, landing on a channel Dash didn’t care about. She immediately began flipping through the channels, hoping she could find a show to watch.
Upon stopping at a random channel, she noticed a particular commercial that caught her attention.
“Today at six, a four hour marathon of ‘Daring Do: The Series’! Afterwards—”
“There’s a show!?” Dash immediately got up from her husband, immediately sitting up on the couch once again. She excitedly screamed in a fangirl-ish manner, quickly poking Jorge’s stomach with a hoof. “Quick! Grab the popcorn! We’re watching this!”
Jorge simply blinked at how fast Dash had reacted upon the very mention of a Daring Do show. He snickered, getting up from his comfortable spot, and walking off to the kitchen.
Dash could hear as her husband opened several cabinets, trying to find the popcorn.
“Uhh… Babe?” He called out.
“Yeah?” She looked over at the Kitchen’s direction.
“We’re out of popcorn…”
Dash looked back at the TV, laying back against the couch. “Crud.” She crossed her hooves.
Jorge walked out of the kitchen, walking behind the couch. “Need me to go run by the grocery store real quick and get some?”
Dash’s face lit up upon hearing her husband’s inquiry. She turned around, her back legs now holding her up as she held herself up against the back of the couch with her forelegs. “Pleaaaaaaase?”
“Say no more, Dashie.” Jorge smiled, pecking her lips softly. “I’m on it.” Dash smiled back, watching him as he made his way towards the door.
She looked at a nearby clock, noticing the time it currently was. She widened her eyes, turning her focus back to Jorge. “Jorge!”
The stallion stopped right in his tracks, turning his head towards his waifu. “Yeah?”
“You got fifteen minutes…” Dash pointed at the clock.
Jorge blinked, raising an eyebrow. “When’s the marathon again?”
“At six.”
Jorge looked at the clock, deadpanning as he realized the time. “Right…”
“Hurry up!”
“Alright, fine!” Jorge said with a chuckle. “Chill out…” He quickly made his way out the door, and to the grocery store.
“Fifteen minutes… That should be easy…”
“Aha!” Jorge cheered, having found the popcorn he was sent to buy. He grabbed two small boxes containing several packets of popcorn, and threw them into his shopping cart.
He exited the aisle, looking around to double check for anything else he might have needed while he was here. He looked off to the distance, finding the dessert aisle. He placed a thinking hoof on his chin, wondering if his favorite flavored ice cream would be there this time.
He quickly made his way to the aisle, not wanting to waste time before the marathon started, and went directly for one of the freezers, particularly the one that normally carried his ice cream.
“Ugh. I can never find the cookie-dough flavored one…” He muttered to himself, irritated over his inability to find his tasty dessert.
Seconds later, he heard a familiar voice speak up. “It’s… in this one.”
Jorge pulled his head back a bit, pausing for a moment before he would take a step back, and look over towards the voice. He found the voice’s owner to be Shadow, standing in front of the freezer next to his own.
“Oh.” He blinked. “They must’ve moved it, then…”
“Yep…” Shadow simply said, watching as his friend closed the freezer door he was still holding, and reaching for the other one as he attempted to dig for the flavor he had been searching for.
As he watched Jorge finally find the ice cream he was looking for, Shadow decided to speak up. “So, what brings you here, Jorge?”
Jorge pulled his cart closer, placing the ice cream down in it. “Funny, I was gonna ask you the same thing.”
“Twilight’s goddamn cravings...” Shadow groaned. “You?”
“There’s a marathon of a show and Dash and I are gonna watch it.” Jorge smiled softly. “She wanted me to grab some snacks, but I wanted to pass by here real quick cause I’ve been craving some cookie dough ice cream…”
“So. I’m here for my wife’s cravings. And you’re here for your own.”
Jorge pondered Shadow’s statement for a moment, then nodded. “Yeah, basically.”
Shadow deadpanned. “Good job.”
“Welp.” Jorge grabbed his cart. “I gotta go grab some other stuff.”
Shadow just kept looking ahead, seeming to stare right through his Cuban friend, completely zoned out from the world around him.
“...Shadow?” Jorge raised an eyebrow. “You alright there?”
Shadow quickly shook his head, having heard his friend’s voice, snapping him from whatever trance he was in. “Huh?” He blinked. “Oh. Yeah, alright... See ya, Jorge…”
Jorge narrowed his eyes. “Normally, I would ask why he looks so tired, even his eyes are bloodshot from how tired he looks… But Dash is gonna kill me if I take too long…” He thought, grabbing his cart once more as he began to make his way to the register.
“I’ll ask him about it tomorrow.”
“We will return to the show after these messages…”
“Aww! C’mon!” Dash shouted, grabbing another hoof-full of popcorn. “They decided to throw a commercial break right after a cliffhanger!?”
“You get used to it after a while.” Jorge chuckled, scooping another spoonful of his ice cream.
“Ugh, I don’t think I can…” Dash rolled her eyes, leaning back on the couch. She impatiently waited for the commercials to end, even going as far as crossing her hooves as she sighed deeply.
Then she smelled something... something sweet… She looked over to her husband, noticing the frozen treat he was eating.
“Jorge…?” She spoke softly.
“Hm?” Jorge hummed, stuffing himself with another spoonful.
“Whatcha eatin’?”
Jorge tilted his bowl to his wife, showing the contents. “Cookie dough ice cream. I’ve been wanting some for a whi—”
“Could I try some?”
Jorge blinked. “I thought you didn’t like this ice cream…”
“I don’t…” Dash shook her head. “But, I dunno… I feel like… I want some…”
Jorge raised an eyebrow, reaching his bowl closer to her. He watched as she took the bowl from him, grabbing a small spoonful of the ice cream. Knowing her, she’ll probably just say she didn’t like it again, and give it back.
But, seconds later, she did the complete opposite. She practically stole the bowl for herself, grabbing another spoonful to stuff her mouth with.
“Sweet Celestia… This is actually really good!” She widened her eyes. “Please tell me there’s still more left over!”
“Uh…” Jorge was left dumbfounded, before, his wife hated this ice cream, now all of a sudden, it’s her new favorite thing. “Yea—”
“Could you get me another bowl?”
Jorge deadpanned. “Yeah, I guess…”
“‘Kay, hurry up. The show’s about to come back any second!”
Jorge grumbled, heading back to the kitchen to serve another bowl of ice cream for his wife...And another one for himself.
“Y’know what would be great?” He heard his wife ask.
“What would that be?”
“I’mma try mixing my popcorn with the ice cream, and see what happens…”
In an instant, a wave of realization had washed over him, practically slapping him in the face, for he now knew…
Dash’s cravings kicked in.
“I knew I should’ve gotten more than one pail of ice cream…”

//-------------------------------------------------------//
                  Chapter 3-4: Pizza Talk                  
//-------------------------------------------------------//
Chapter 3-4: Pizza Talk
“C’mon, Jorge! Twilight’s waiting!”
“She can wait a few minutes!”
“You clearly haven’t seen pregnant Twilight…”
“And you clearly don’t know me.” Jorge deadpanned.
“No, like. I saw pregnant Twilight.” Dash replied. “She gets pissed really easily…”
“I blame her hormones.” Jorge monotoned.
“Yep, that's probably what's doing it…” Dash nodded in agreement. “Hopefully I don’t reach that point…”
“I doubt you will.” Jorge shook his head, opening the door in front of them as they left their house. “You’ve been doing fine so far.”
Dash stayed silent for a moment, then nodded. “Good.” With a grin on her face, she flared her wings open. “I bet ya I’ll make it to Twilight’s before you do.”
Jorge raised an eyebrow, stopping directly in his tracks, and looked over to his wife. “What’re you doing?”
“Getting ready to race, duh!”
Jorge narrowed his eyes. “No you’re not.”
“...What do you mean ‘no I’m not’?” Dash asked.
“You’ll hurt the foal, Rainbow!” Jorge stomped a hoof on the ground.
“No I won’t!” Dash retorted. “If anything, our foal will probably end up tough like me!”
Jorge simply deadpanned. “No it won’t.”
“Why not?”
“It doesn’t work that way…”
“What do you mean it doesn’t work tha—”
“Just because you’ve gone through training, and workouts, and whatever else you do in your spare time when I’m not around!” Jorge grumbled. “...Doesn’t automatically mean it’s going to apply to our foal. Neither will pushing your body through such extremes at your current state.”
Dash blinked. “...Oh.”
“So for the time being, no flying.” Jorge stated.
“What!?” Dash shouted, her eyes going as wide as basketballs. “What do you mean no flying?!”
“Dash, we’ve dated for two years.” Jorge deadpanned. “Now we’re married. Don’t you think I’ve been with you long enough to know that once you start flying, you’re gonna start doing what you do?”
Dash raised an eyebrow, her expression growing into a more angered one. “And what is it that I do?”
“You start doing tricks, flying real fast, that kind of stuff.” Jorge explained. “Things like that can hurt the foal. Or maybe something worse.” He sighed softly. Sure, he may have been a little too blunt for such a sensitive topic, he felt it was the only way to get through her stubborn head.
Dash widened her eyes, pausing as the thought of losing her foal began to sink into her head. The more she thought about it, the more other thoughts began to dig into her head. Soon enough, she looked up to her husband, her eyes dripping with tears.
“J-Jorge…?”
Her husband noticed her current emotional state, and immediately walked up to her, and gently pulling her into a hug.
“Shhh…” He wrapped a wing around her. “You’re not gonna lose the foal… I won’t let that happen…”
“B-But… What if—”
“No buts.” Jorge shook his head, lifting hers up with a hoof so she would face him. “Look at me. I won’t let it happen. As long as you let me help you, we’ll be fine. Alright?”
Dash stayed silent for a few seconds, then nodded slowly. “Okay…” She quietly spoke.
“Okay…” Jorge spoke back, kissing her forehead gently. “Now… We’d better hurry, if we take any longer, Twilight’ll probably grab Shadow, and use him to stab me to death…”
Dash softly began to giggle at her husband’s comment, as she wiped her tears off her face.
“If Shadow had a horn, I’d bet she’d try to stab me using his horn, too.” He chuckled, smiling as he watched his wife laugh along with him.
“And then she’ll just yell at him for stabbing me. Even though it was her fault...”
“Why are they taking so long!?” Twilight shouted. “They should’ve been here five minutes ago!”
“But… It’s just five minutes…” Shadow rolled his eyes. “They don’t have to be here perfectly on time, babe…”
“Do you know how rude it is to be late?” Twilight raised an eyebrow at her husband. “It’s extremely rude!”
“You didn’t hear a single word I said, did you?”
“Like, seriously!” Twilight groaned. “Would it kill them to show up on time for just one day?”
Almost as if on cue, the door to the castle opened, and a familiar voice had shouted back at the mare.
“You know we have these things? Y’know, they’re called lives?” Jorge deadpanned. “You used to have one?”
Twilight turned around, facing the cuban. “Even so, you’ve never showed up on time for a singl—”
“Your wedding.” Jorge interrupted.
Twilight immediately cut herself off, pausing for a moment at the cuban’s counter. “...Maybe you have showed up on time for things…”
Jorge rolled his eyes. “And, as usual, the cuban gets blamed for stuff he didn’t do…”
“Oh shut up.” Twilight retorted. “You’re five minutes late, the pizza’s starting to get cold.”
Jorge feigned a gasp. “Oh no! Five whole minutes! The already flaming hot pizza’s starting to run cold in only five minutes!”
“Alright.” Dash cut in. “I think she got the point...”
“I don’t think she has…” Jorge grumbled.
“I have...” Twilight deadpanned, sighing softly, trying to change the subject. “Let’s just eat, already…”
Jorge simply nodded in agreement. “There had better be pineapples in one of them…”
“Calm your cuban ass, Jorge.” Shadow rolled his eyes. “It’s not like we’d intentionally buy a pizza without toppings despite you asking us to get some…”
“Good…”
“Cause then I’d have to deal with your complaining…”
“Fuck you too, Shadow.”
“So, Jorge…” Shadow spoke softly. “How’s life with pregnant Dash?”
“Not as chaotic as life with pregnant Twilight according to what I've heard.” Jorge chuckled. “Speaking of which, how’s that like?”
“Well you see...at the start is was a simple walk down a fiery path...” Shadow began, “And then, I got to see the gates of Hell. And then they opened... and all of hell broke loose.”
Jorge blinked. “Oh.”
“Yeah…” Shadow nodded slowly. “What’s Dash like?”
“Uh. The complete opposite of Twilight…” Jorge explained. “She’s extremely cuddly, extremely clingy, but she gets so adorable at times…”
“YOU LUCKY BASTARD!” Shadow stomped a hoof onto the floor. “I GET THE DEMON PREGNANCY, AND YOU GET THE ANGEL PREGNANCY!?”
Jorge paused for a moment, thinking about how to respond to Shadow’s question.
“Yeah, basically.” He shrugged.
Shadow sighed. “Seven more months…”
Jorge looked off to the distance, watching as their wives continued to talk to each other as they continued to eat their pizza, which appeared to have rather strange toppings, such as pickles and some potato chips from a bag Shadow left lying around, but otherwise they were still calmly talking.
“Well. Twilight’s starting to look the part.” He noted.
Shadow raised an eyebrow, looking over to his wife, noticing the size of her belly, having gone from being flat to a small lump.
“Yeah…” He nodded. “Let’s just hope she doesn’t complain about looking fat…”
“Twilight? Self-aware?” Jorge looked at him with a questioning look. “Please… I don’t think she’s the kind of mare to complain about her looks...”
“This is pregnant Twilight we’re talkin’ about here…” Shadow narrowed his eyes. “She complains about everything.”
“Fair enough.”
Shadow rolled his eyes, looking back at the two mares. “Y’know, I think Dash’s starting to show a tiny bit…”
“Really?” Jorge raised an eyebrow, looking over to her belly, while wasn’t as noticeable as Twilight’s, he could just barely see the small “baby bump”.
“Eight more months…” He sighed. “I’m not ready…”
“Not this shit again, Jorge…” Shadow patted him on the back. “You’re gonna be fine. If you two can take care of each other with no problems, then you’ll both be perfectly A-OK taking care of a foal…”
Jorge nodded. “You’re right…” He looked over to his friend. “What about you? Do you think you’re up for it?”
“Fuck no…” Shadow shook his head. “I was thrown into this situation unwillingly. At least you and Dash had some sort of plan. Albeit it happened earlier than you were expecting it to… But, if I’m able to take care of demon-Twi, then a foal will be a cakewalk. Hell, two foals would be a cakewalk.”
“If you say so…”
“Please, what’s the worst that could happen?”
Author's Note
Sorry for the late update! Better late than never, as they say! :twilightblush: https://static.fimfiction.net/images/emoticons/twilightblush.png

//-------------------------------------------------------//
            Chapter 3-6: "Birth" of the Memege             
//-------------------------------------------------------//
Chapter 3-6: "Birth" of the Memege
Jorge sat on the couch, casually flipping through channels as he tried to find a way to make this seemingly uneventful day more...eventful.
“Next up on the shopping chann—”
*click*
“And now back to the Daring D—”
“NOT AGAIN!” Jorge shouted, quickly catching himself and covering his mouth, hoping he hadn’t awoken his sleeping wife.
He looked back where the door to their room was, waiting for a moment to see if it would open with a cranky pregnant Dash bursting through it.
Luckily, that didn’t happen.
With a sigh, he plopped himself back onto the couch, returning through his channel surfing.
*click*
“Chocolate Ca—”
*click*
“In more recent news, this is the first foal to ever be adopted by a creature from another wo—”
*click*
“And that, my friends, is how you—”
Jorge blinked, changing the channel back. “First foal to be what?”
*click*
“Here we have the colt’s new adoptive father, Ishtaba, ready to talk about his choice to adopt this young foal.”
Jorge simply deadpanned at his TV, trying to find the right words to describe how he feels about this current scene.
In an instant, he heard a soft knocking on his door. He turned his head to the sound, raising an eyebrow. The knocking had continued, urging the cuban to get up and see who was behind the door.
The second the door was opened, a familiar grey pegasus ran into the house, leaving Jorge to simply close the door once he had registered what had happened.
Shadow deadpanned at the TV upon the sight of the channel Jorge was on. “Looks like you already saw the news…”
Jorge walked up next to his canadian friend, looking at the TV with him. “Yep…”
“So tell me, Ishtaba, what made you, a human from another world, decide to adopt a foal all of a sudden?”
Ishtaba looked at the camera, then down at the microphone. “Uh. Well… The orphanage looked like a shitty place for him to live. So I… Uh… I figured I could at least give him a less shittier home.”
Jorge and Shadow simply look at each other with narrowed eyes, both of them sharing the exact same thoughts as they looked back at the TV.
“Are you implying that the orphanage isn’t doing their job?”
Shadow’s hoof met his face, while Jorge continued to watch with a deadpan.
“No, not at all. They’re doing their job well, it’s just that the other fillies and colts don’t get along with Cryo Flare, and I can kinda relate to that.” Ish grabbed the blueberry colored colt, rustling autumn red hair as he placed him on his back for a piggyback ride. “He and I… We’re too good for everyone else. The best gotta stick together.”
Jorge continued to watch silently, while Shadow’s jaw looked like it was about to drop onto the floor any second.
“So you felt a sort of need to help young Cryo?”
“Well. Yeah, pretty much. I have to guide this young lad and hope he turns out as well as me”
“That’s it.” Jorge snapped. “I’m grabbing my bat.”
Shadow blinked, looking at the cuban’s direction as he walked over to his room silently, then looked back at the TV.
“Well, I hope everything goes well for you and Cryo Flare!”
“Alright. Let’s go.”
Shadow blinked, turning his head back to see the cuban stallion holding a bat in his hoof. He raised an eyebrow, questioning the bat.
“Jorge? You don’t need the bat. You’re a stallion now… You can just kick him with your—”
“But I want the bat.” Jorge monotoned. “It’s the same bat I beat him with at your wedding.”
“But you don’t need the ba—”
“But I want the bat.”
The two of them stayed silent for a moment, trying to figure out where to go from there. Only for Shadow to quickly break the silence.
“Fine. Bring the goddamn bat.” He grumbled. “It doesn’t even matter anymore.”
“I’m free!” Cryo cheered, bouncing around, almost eerily like Pinkie Pie when she’s happy about something as trivial as the oven dinging. “I finally have a family! I can’t believe it! Those other fillies were wrong! It’s finally happening!”
Ish blinked as Cryo continued his excitement. “Woah there, chill, fam.” He spoke timidly, trying to grab the foal’s attention. “First of all you and I gotta establish some ground rules.”
Cryo immediately stopped bouncing around, focusing all his attention to his new “father”. “Okay! I’m all ears!”
Ish sighed happily at how easy it was to grab the foal’s attention. “Alright. First thing’s first, I don’t like to be called a ‘father’. I’m too fucking awesome for that shit. If anything, you and I are… bros. That sound cool?”
Cryo raised an eyebrow for a moment to think, then quickly nodded in response. “Sounds cool.’
“Second of all. You will also be known as my ‘memege’ from now on.”
“What’s a… ‘me-my-jay’?” Cryo cocked his head to the side.
“No. Not a ‘me my jay’. That sounds like a fucking prostitute club or something...” Ish shook his head. “It’s pronounced ‘mee-meh-jeh’. It’s like a protege, but with memes.”
“Ohh…” Cryo slowly nodded, seeming to understand what Ish was saying. “...What’s a meme?”
“You don’t know what memes are!?” Ish took a step back. “Oh boy. We got a lot of work to do.”
“No. You do not.”
Ish blinked, looking in front of him, only to find two pegasi walking towards him, one with a bat, and the other trying to talk to the bat-wielding maniac.
“Shit. It’s Jorge and Shadow…”
“Jorge, wait…” Shadow tried to talk some sense into the cuban. “There’s a colt watching. You can’t just beat Ish up with a fucking bat in front of a kid!”
“No?” Jorge raised an eyebrow, walking faster towards Ish with a smirk. “Watch me.”
“JORGE GODDAMMIT THAT’S NOT WHAT I MEANT!”
Ish’s eyes widened, covering his face with his hands as he cowered in fear. “NO JORGE WAIT, YOU’LL TRAUMATIZE THE LAD!”
“THAT’S YOUR FAULT FOR PULLING THIS SHIT IN THE FIRST PLACE!”
All the while, Cryo simply backs away, hiding behind Ish with his eyes clenched shut as the red pegasus got closer and closer.
Shadow tried to find another way to get into his head, thinking of one more thing to shout at him before moving on to desperate measures. “JORGE. STOP. THINK OF WHAT YOU’LL DO TO THE FOAL! IMAGINE WHAT WOULD HAPPEN IF I HIT YOU IN FRONT OF YOUR KID!”
It was already too late, Jorge was already in front of his, his hoof up in the air, ready to swing down the bat. He let out a loud yell, swinging the bat down with full force.
Shadow’s eyes widened. “JORGE! NO!”
*CRACK*
In an instant, silence had filled the air. Cryo opened an eye, looking around to find his “bro” was still alive and standing. Ish, too, had paused for a moment before lifting his head up from his hands, looking around to find that he wasn’t hit with the bat, after all. He looked over to his side, noticing a now broken bat on the ground, the handle was completely missing from the bat, as well as now-obvious signs that the bat was actually made out of metal, with a wooden outer shell to give it the appearance of an ordinary bat.
“Well. There goes fifty bits down the drain.” Jorge sighed.
Shadow blinked, still trying to understand what had just happened right before his eyes.
“Well. You both got my attention.” Jorge closed his eyes as he attempted to calm himself. He sighed once more, opening his eyes slowly as he did so. “I guess we’re going to talk about this instead of using brute force, now.”
Ish looked over to Shadow, who was now calmly walking over to the group, then back to Jorge. “...Did I miss something?”
“No. But apparently we did.” Shadow commented. “The hell were you thinking? Adopting a foal?”
“Well. I was thinking to myself about what would happen when I die of old age…”
”If you ever reach old age…”
“Shut up, cuban.” Ish flicked his hand in a shooing motion. “And I thought to myself… Who would continue to bring all the memes here in Equestria?”
“We never needed anyone bringing memes in Equestria in the first place…” Jorge muttered.
“Shut up Jorge, no one asked for your opinion.” Ish deadpanned, returning back to his story. “So, I thought… Why not have a protege who would continue my legacy when I am no longer here?”
Shadow simply nodded. “So, what lead you to Cryo, here?”
“Oh. Well, long story short: He somehow got lost out here in Ponyville while I was doing my morning walk. And I noticed him looking around desperately for something. At first I thought he was just looking for his parents or some shit like that, and then he ended up hoping I’d know where the orphanage was, seeing how tall I was to be able to see it.”
“I’m so glad that was ‘long story short’.” Jorge rolled his eyes.
Ish simply ignored the cuban. “And so he started telling me about all the shit he went through back in the orphanage, and how he hoped that one day a family would come and adopt him. So, I figured, why not kill two birds with one stone, and help the poor guy out, y’know?”
Shadow paused for a moment to take in Ish’s story, nodding all the while. Shortly afterwards, he had came to a conclusion.
“Ish. You can’t just simply adopt a foal like that!” Shadow deadpanned. “It doesn’t work that way! Take him back, right now.”
“That’s not how it works, I already signed the papers and everything. You don’t just simply take him back!” Ish crossed his arms. “I have full custody over him, now!”
“You’re forgetting one thing.”
“And what’s that?”
“I’m a fucking Prince.”
“Of what? Bullshit?”
“Prince of Bullshit…” Jorge muttered. “That kinda makes sense, if you kinda think about it… I’m gonna have to talk to Celestia about that…”
Shadow deadpanned. “Jorge. Now’s not the time.”
“But ‘Prince of Bullshit’ sounds freakin’ hilarious!”
“Jorge…”
“Like, remember those ‘Prince of Persia’ games? I’m imagining that, but with bullshit instead of Persia.”
“Jorge!”
“What?” Jorge blinked, having completely forgotten what the whole argument was about.
“Ish. The colt. Remember?” Shadow raised an eyebrow.
“Oh right…” Jorge nodded, immediately deadpanning Ish. “That was the dumbest thing I’ve ever seen you do, Ish. It even hit the news!”
“Damnnn… That fast?” Ish raised an eyebrow. “Makes sense considering how you two found out when I’ve literally said nothing to you guys ever since you got your waifus pregnant…”
“That’s besides the point.” Jorge and Shadow reply in unison.
“You’re right. The point is: I don’t give three fucks if Shadow’s a prince or a fucking God, Cryo stays with me.” Ish crossed his arms. “If you shitheads don’t like it, then ‘ay lmao.’”
Cryo slowly peeked his head out from behind Ish’s legs, looking up at the two adult stallions in front of him.
“Besides…” Ish shrugged. “If I can handle my stupid brother, I’m pretty sure I can handle Cryo. He’s a pretty chill kid. And it’s not like I can’t support him. I have a job and my own apartment, remember?”
Jorge and Shadow look at each other, shrugged, then looked back at Ish.
“I guess we’ll give it a shot.” Shadow muttered. “But if you screw up badly one time, Ish... I’m taking that foal off your hands.”
“‘Aight fam. We gucci.” Ish reached his arm out, waiting for Shadow to reach out his hoof so they could officially seal the deal with a hand/hoofshake .
Shadow simply looked at Ish’s hand with narrowed eyes, then back up to Ish’s face. Only to extend his wing, and slap the asian in the face.
“The fuck mannnn…?” Ish rubbed his face, staring daggers at the canadian.
“That was a warning slap.” Shadow pointed a hoof at his face. “I mean it, Ish. Screw up, and you’re gonna get a lot more than just that.”
“Chill, fam.” Ish attempted to pat Shadow’s back, trying to reassure the grey pegasus. “I’ve matured. I can take care of the boy.”
“I kinda find that hard to believe, Ish…” Jorge threw his two cents in.
“Find what hard to believe?” Ish raised an eyebrow.
“That you matured.” Jorge bluntly replied. “That’s never going to happen.”
“Fine.” Ish crossed his arms. “You’ll see. In a few weeks, Cryo will be well memed, and you two will have no choice but to shut up and see how wrong you were.”
Jorge and Shadow looked at each other with narrowed eyes, then back at Ish.
“We’ll see about that.” Shadow monotoned.
Jorge nodded. “We’ll be checking on you every so often. So you better make sure you keep him safe, healthy, and happy. Otherwise, we will take him away from you, and we wil—”
“Just shut up already…” Ish rolled his eyes. “I get it. You’ll take him away, and you’ll bring Celestia to shove the statue of liberty up my ass or something.”
“As long as you’re aware of that. Then we’re good.” Shadow turned around, and began walking away, with Jorge quickly following suit.
”By the way, Shadow… You know you owe me a new bat, right?”
”Yeah yeah, just put it on the royal tab.
”Actually, think I could borrow some money from the ‘royal tab’?”
”No, Jorge…”
”Dammit…”
Cryo finally came out from behind Ish’s legs, walking up in front of his new “bro”, catching his attention.
Ish noticed the bat still lying there on the ground. At first, he hadn’t paid much attention to the bat’s metal core. But now that he was alone and able to think, he was finally able to notice it clearly.
“...So that explains why that bat hurts so much…”

//-------------------------------------------------------//
             Chapter 3-7: Shadow's "Vacation"              
//-------------------------------------------------------//
Chapter 3-7: Shadow's "Vacation"
“Twilight, seriously... you can’t eat all the ice cream in the freezer in one sitting...” Shadow sighed. “All that sugar isn’t good for you…”
Twilight raised an eyebrow at her husband. “Oh yeah? Watch me.”
Shadow deadpanned as his wife made a run for the kitchen, her horn glowing for what he assumed would be to open the freezer door before she arrives there. He immediately chased her down to the kitchen, his entire mind going blank once he had saw all four full jugs of differently flavored ice creams floating out of the freezer, and onto the table.
Twilight squeed as she made a rather large spoon appear from nowhere with a spell, walking up to the table to devour the contents of all four jugs.
Before she could get any closer, however, Shadow swiftly took all the jugs of ice cream, flew away with all of them, and proceeded to throw them out the balcony, and then flew back to the kitchen.
Twilight blinked. Switching her field of view from the table to her husband and back every few seconds, as she tried to process what just happened.
“I did it for your own good, Twily. Yours, and the foal’s.”
“For fuck’s sake, Shadow…” Jorge groaned. “Haven’t you learned that you can’t take away food from a pregnant mare by now?”
“No. I have not.” Shadow shook his head. “I’m only trying to do her and the foal a favor. But that’s besides the point.”
“You know my doors are always open, Shadow. I don’t exactly have a guest room set up yet, but you’re more than welcome to sleep on the couch.” Jorge pointed at the couch behind him.
“That couch?”
“Yes, that couch.”
“The one you’ve had to bleach countless times for some reason?”
“Uh… Well… I have a futon I could grab from the attic…”
“You have an attic?” Shadow raised an eyebrow.
Jorge nodded.
“When the fuck’d you get an attic?”
“I’ve always had an attic…” Jorge shrugged .”I just don’t use it very often. Mostly just for storage.”
“Storage? As in blea—”
“No, not as in bleach.” Jorge interrupted. “Get your mind out of the gutter.”
“Oh…”
“I hide my bleach in th—”
“I DON’T WANNA KNOW!”
“Then don’t bring it up!” Jorge retorted.
“Geez, Jorge…”
“What?” Jorge raised an eyebrow. “You were the one who brought it up. You brought this upon yourself, to be honest…”
Shadow rolled his eyes in disappointment. “Whatever. Did you use that futon?”
Jorge blinked. “No.” He scoffed. “I have a perfectly good couch, which is tremendously more comfortable than a futon. Why the hel—” He paused for a moment, finally letting Shadow’s sentence sink into his head. “Oh… Why the hell would I want to use the futon!? The couch is still more comfortab—”
“Because what haven’t you used in here?”
Jorge deadpanned. “I may have a… overly healthy sex life… But that doesn’t mean we just do it everywh—”
“You’ve done it on the table, haven’t you?”
“Who wouldn’t?”
“The shower?”
“It’s convenient!”
“The floor?”
“Who the hell has sex on the floor?”
“...The couch?”
“Didn’t we already cover this?”
Shadow looked at the couch behind Jorge, then back at the cuban. “Riiiiight…”
Jorge slowly began to rub his face with a hoof, trying not to slam his face in the worst facehoof ever. “Look. I haven’t used the futon. It’s still in its original packaging and everything. We can go up to the attic real quick, move the couch, and set it up.”
Shadow sighed. “Nah, then we’d have to assemble it, and make the bed, and then probably deal with the sounds of you and Dash in your room somewhere…”
”We don’t do it everyd—
“So, instead. I have a better idea!”
Jorge gave the canadian a knowing look, raising an eyebrow slightly. “And that is?”
“I’m going to take a trip to Cloudsdale!”
“Why?” Jorge’s eyebrow raised up to it’s maximum height.
“I’ve never been there before… So, y’know, this’ll be something new for me!”
“You’ve never been to Cloudsdale?” Jorge’s eyebrow somehow began pushing its limits. “I’ve been there like… twice, now…”
“That’s cause you’re married to the mare who was born there…”
“True…”
Shadow paused for a moment, thinking about how he’d go about actually making his trip to Cloudsdale. “Say… Since you’ve been to Cloudsdale before… How’d you like to tag along with m—”
“No.” Jorge deadpanned. “I can’t just leave Dashie here while she’s napping and pregnant!”
“Why not?”
“You have no idea how cuddly she gets! I mean, I don’t mind it, but still.” Jorge retorted. “If I leave her now while she’s napping, I’ll never hear the end of it…”
“Why? Cause she’ll get lonely and shit?”
Jorge narrowed his eyes. “Unlike you, I don’t have a wife who’s hormones turn them into a she-demon.”
“Super cuddly and never hearing the end of it if you don't provide sounds a lot like a she-demon to me..."
“That’s if provoked. You don’t have to provoke yours, you just have to exist.”
“Well then just guide me to cloudsdale, then you can come back if you really want.”
Jorge groaned. “Fine…”
“How the fuck’d you get stuck in a cloud!?”
“I don’t fucking know! I was just looking at something, and the next second... Boom! Cloud!”
“You’ve had these things for how long, now?” Jorge lifted a wing for emphasis.
“Uh…”
“And of all the screw ups either of us could’ve made, you go and get stuck in a clo—”
“I get it!” Shadow shouted, interrupting the cuban. “You don’t have to rub it in so much, god damn…”
Jorge shrugged. “Whatever. My work here is done though.” He flared his wings, bending his legs slightly as he prepared himself to fly away. “Have fun with your little trip around Cloudsdale.”
“Woah woah woah!” Shadow cut the red pegasus off guard. “Where the hell do you think you’re going!?”
Jorge blinked. “Back home. Dashie’s probably already awake worrying abou—”
“Well too fucking bad for her!” Shadow interrupted. “You’re my tour guide!”
Jorge deadpanned. “I never agreed to—”
“Look! A dil— Ooh! A pet shop!”
Jorge raised an eyebrow, looking over to where Shadow immediately pointed at, noticing its cute “pet shop” logo, with a small dog on top of the “pet”, and a cat and a bunny on top of the “shop”.
And then, he looked directly adjacent to the store, noticing certain… other objects, showcased in a small corner of the window.
He deadpanned. “Uh… Shadow?”
“Hm?” Shadow looked at the cuban with a raised eyebrow.
“I don’t think that’s an actual pet shop…”
Shadow blinked, looking back over to the pet shop, only to notice a pegasus mare walking out of the store in what appeared to be… a… “cat outfit”.
He paused for a moment, trying to process what he had just seen.
“Was...that a...cat costume…?”
“I… Uh…” Jorge tried to find a good response that doesn’t make him look like a horrible husband. “I think so…”
Shadow looked at Jorge, then back at the ‘pet shop’, then back at Jorge. “Wanna go take a look inside?”
Jorge sat in silence for a second, not having noticed what Shadow had said. Only for it to sink into his head seconds later. “What?” He blinked, having just realized what his canadian friend has just suggested. “No, I don’t wanna go take a look inside!”
“Why not?” Shadow raised an eyebrow. “Sounds like fun!”
“How the hell does it sound like fun!?”
“How does that not sound like fun!?”
“Shadow!” Jorge shouted. “You’re married!”
“So?”
“So!?”
“Yeah. I don’t see any problem with it…” Shadow shook his head.
Jorge rolled his eyes, walking away from the grey pegasus. “Whatever…”
“Where the hell are you going!?” Shadow practically barked at the cuban.
“Away from this place!” Jorge shouted back. “That is not a place for me to be near.”
“The fuck you mean by that!?”
“I’ve already said what I’ve needed to say, Shadow!”
“The hell you have!” Shadow stomped a hoof on the ground, looking past Jorge, noticing the other stores that were near his path. “This ‘pet shop’ place looks…”
Jorge stopped in his tracks, hearing the canadian trail off from his sentence. He looked back at where the stallion originally stood, only to find him nowhere in sight. The cuban blinked, raising an eyebrow at his friend’s sudden disappearance, then turned his head back to his path, and found Shadow several feet away, slamming a few bits on a donut stand.
“I need like ten jelly donuts, one chocolate donut, and one banana donut.”
The mare managing the stand looked at the bits, then back up at Shadow, and shrugged. Grabbed a small box, turned around, and began grabbing the donuts the canadian asked for.
Jorge blinked. “Seems legit.”
Once Shadow had gotten the donuts, he walked back over to Jorge, nomming on one of his jelly donuts.
“What were we talkin’ about again?” He raised an eyebrow, continuing to eat his donut.
Jorge blinked. “Uh…”
Shadow looked around, preparing to wander about Cloudsdale some more, until he noticed a rather large building not too far away. He immediately pointed at it, and gasped. “Ooh! What’s that?”
Jorge looked at the direction Shadow had suddenly began pointing at, and raised an eyebrow at what he found.
“Uh. That would be the weather fact—”
“‘KAY WE’RE GOING THERE!”
“Wha—” In an instant, Jorge was cut off from his thought as Shadow quickly bolted towards the factory, with not a single care in the world.
“...Why am I not surprised…?” He groaned, running after the canadian.
“I didn’t think they started selling tickets just to go on tour around the weather factory…” Jorge facehoofed.
“Who cares? This shit is amazing!” Shadow grinned. “I paid for the tickets, we’re going in!”
Jorge rolled his eyes, groaning at how childish his friend seemed to behave.
The two continued on their path inside the weather factory, Shadow would bounce around similarly to Pinkie as he merely gawked in awe at the wonders inside. From flowing rainbows, to machines compressing water to make storm clouds.
Jorge, having seen the inside of the factory a couple of times, simply looked around, finding a few changes from the last time he was here.
“Ooh, what’s this?” Jorge could barely hear being said. He looked over to where he thought the voice came from, noticing Shadow completely ignoring the rather large “warning” sign, walking closer to a large machine, which almost looked like it was lightly covered in...ice.
Jorge ran up to the warning sign, trying to get close enough for Shadow to be able to hear him. “Uh… Shadow? I really don’t think you should be getting near that…!”
“But it looks so coooool!”
“Shadow…!”
“But it looks so cold… Kinda like Canada…”
“Shadow!”
“The fuck do you want!?” Shadow stopped in his tracks, sharply turning his head at the cuban.
“Did you not read the sign!?”
“What sign!?”
Jorge deadpanned, tapping the sign with his hoof.
Shadow squinted his eyes softly, trying to read what was written on the back of the sign. He read through the large red “WARNING” plastered onto it. He simply paused for a moment.
“Oh.” He blinked. “So that’s what it said…That kinda makes sense now...”
Jorge raised an eyebrow. “What’d you think it said?”
Shadow’s eyes shot wide open. “Uh, nothing.” He shook his head quickly, sheepishly walking back up to the cuban. “Let’s go, nothing to see here.”
Jorge watched as Shadow walked right past him, pretending this event never happened.
The cuban prepared a thought, opening his mouth to say it aloud to the canadian. “Well—”
“Ooh! What’s this for?”
Jorge rolled his eyes, not even trying to question his friend’s actions.
The two soon found themselves in an outside area, with a few small pools of pure rainbow around them.
Jorge knew this area all too well, having gotten yelled at by his wife--who was simply his marefriend at the time--for wanting to try to, quite literally, taste the rainbow. Other than her, that is.
“Jorge…” Shadow poked the cuban with a hoof. “You never told me that rainbows were actually a liquid…”
“Err…” Jorge scratched the back of his head. “They’re… kinda not…”
“But I can clearly see how ‘liquidy’ they are!”
“...’liquidy’?” Jorge cocked his head to the side. “The fuck’s that supposed to mean?”
“Hell if I know.” Shadow shrugged. “I was put on the spot, what do you expect from me?”
“To not make up words like ‘liquidy’.” Jorge bluntly replied.
“Yeah, well…” Shadow looked over at one of the pools of rainbow. “I’mma taste some of it…”
“That’s not a very smart idea, Shadow…” Jorge spoke softly.
“Why’s that?” Shadow raised an eyebrow at the cuban.
“Well. Dashie always told me not to taste it, cause of something that happened to Pinkie…” Jorge tried to explain. “I always forget what it was…”
Shadow paused for a moment, thinking about his next move. Only to quickly shrug it off. “Don’t care.” He slowly dipped a small section of his hoof into the rainbow, pulling back to see it covered in all the colors of the rainbow, something which simply dumbfounded him. Soon, he quickly remembered his goal, and quickly gave his hoof a lick.
Jorge merely watched as the canadian tasted the rainbow in his mouth. He raised an eyebrow at the lack of any kind of reaction. “So?”
Shadow paused for moment, suddenly beginning to feel a soft burning sensation in his mouth. Which quickly escalated into burning his mouth as if there was fire, unleashing its flames of fury into his mouth. His face quickly shifting from one color, to the next, cycling between each color of the rainbow.
Jorge stood watch as Shadow continued having his mouth burn in flames. He raised an eyebrow at the canadian’s strange reaction, switching his focus from Shadow, to the pool.
As the burning finally begin to dim, Shadow was finally able to calm down. Once he was brought back to his senses, he quickly noticed as his cuban friend had already dipped his hoof in the rainbow, and tasted it.
Moments later, Jorge had no reaction to it. With a shrug, he spoke. “Welp. I think we should be heading back home.”
Shadow blinked. “...Seriously?”
“Hm?” Jorge raised an eyebrow.
“That shit was spicy as hell!”
“Eh. Just a little bit.” Jorge shrugged once more.
“But… but…”
“Clearly, you underestimated this cuban.” Jorge chuckled, walking towards the exit of the factory. “Anyway, like I said, I think we’ve had enough fun in Cloudsdale…”
“Twilight! I’m home!” Shadow cheerily called out, closing the castle’s door behind him, leaving nothing but a grin on his face.
At first, Shadow had expected his wife to not even bother greeting him at all, knowing how she gets now with all her hormones flipping shit.
Instead, Twilight slowly poked her head out of a nearby room, her eyes bloodshot, and parts of her face are damp.
“You’re… You’re back…” Twilight sniffled. “I… I didn’t think you’d come back…”
Shadow raised an eyebrow. “Twi…?” He slowly walked up to her. “Were… Were you crying…?”
Twilight didn’t respond for a moment, until she could muster the strength to slowly nod, trying to resist from sniffling again, only to fail, and look down in disappointment.
Shadow slowly placed a hoof on her chin, lifting her head up slowly until she looked directly at him. “What’s wrong, Twily?”
Twilight sniffled once again. “It’s just… I’ve been treating you like crap during this entire pregnancy… And… I even threw you out of the castle…”
“Heh.” Shadow chuckled softly. “You were expecting me to leave, or something?”
“A little bit…” Twilight nodded gently. “I didn’t think you’d be able to put up with me during this whole thing…”
Shadow leaned in, gently kissing her forehead. “If I can put up with Ish’s bullshit, and my other friend’s stupidity for years. I’m pretty sure I can handle eleven months of hormonal raging from my wife…”
“Shadow…”
Shadow simply smiled, staring into his wife’s eyes as he comforted her. “Don’t worry about it so much, Twilight. I married you for a reason. I love yo—oof!”
Next thing he knew, his pregnant wife had pinned him down onto the floor, being completely on top of him. He blankly laid there, watching as his wife nuzzled into his chest.
...This would end up being a long night.
“Dash?” Jorge raised an eyebrow, slowly pushing the door closed with a rear leg. “I’m home!”
He slowly walked deeper into his home, hearing a faint voice coming from the living room. He eventually made his way there, noticing an empty couch, and the TV playing what seemed to be an imitation of his world’s “Dr. Phil”.
The topic of the show seemed to be completely irrelevant to today’s events. He had half-expected the show to be covering a topic similar to today’s events, or a topic almost identical.
He raised an eyebrow at the show, preparing to shrug it off, and reach for the remote to turn it off.
“Did you even stop to consider that I would worry about you?”
The cuban blinked, turning his head back at the source of the voice.
“Did you even think that something could’ve happened to me while you were out doing Celestia knows what? I’m six months pregnant for pete’s sake! If anything happens I can’t just fly to the hospital by myself!”
Jorge simply stayed silent, turning his whole body around to face her as he listened.
“Do you even know what time it is?”
Jorge paused for a moment, closing his eyes as he calmly tried to think of the time.
“It’s nine o’clock, Jorge... “ Dash grumbled. “I go and take a nap at eleven, and when I wake up...you’re gone.”
“I can explain.” Jorge calmly stated.
“Mhm.” Dash hummed in a sarcastic tone as she nodded. “Go on. Tell me. Just what was so important that you couldn’t even give me a warning before you just upped and left?”
“Well… You see—”
“Were you getting tired of me?”
“No?”
“Am I being too caring for you to be comfortable, or something?”
Jorge simply narrowed his eyes. “Seriously?”
“I dunno, Jorge.” Dash shrugged. “I’m just trying to figure out what would’ve caused you to just leave without any warning and not come back until nine o’clock.”
“Dash, it’s not any of that. You know how I am.” Jorge shook his head. “I enjoy the time we spend together. You know I love it when you get all sappy and all…”
“So then what’s the problem, Jorge?”
“There’s no proble—”
“So why’d you up and leave?”
“Shadow dragged me all the way to Cloudsdale…”
Dash paused for a moment. “Shadow dragged you all the way to Cloudsdale, huh?” She raised an eyebrow.
“Well, like, he dragged me out of the house, but then he forced me to go to Cloudsdale with him.”
“How did he ‘force’ you, Jorge?” Dash’s eyebrow began to raise a little higher. “Did he find some spell to use against you or something?”
“Err... No…?”
“So then he didn’t really ‘force’ you now, did he?”
“Well. I mean… He kept threatening to throw me into the dungeon for about a week…”
Dash nodded slowly, her eyes narrowed as she listened to her husband’s excuse. “Uh-huh. And what were you two doing in Cloudsdale, hm?”
“Shadow wanted some sort of ‘vacation’, and demanded me to be his tour guide.”
Dash scoffed, turning around as he began to walk away. “Whatever, Jorge. If you’re not gonna tell me what’s going on or what you were doing the entire day, and then try to blame it on one of your friends... Then you can have fun sleeping on the couch.”
“This is my house, thoug—”
“It became ours a few months after I moved in with you, remember?”
“Right…”
“Have fun on the couch, Jorge!”
“But—”
*SLAM!*
Jorge blinked, trying to process what had just happened. He tried to tell the truth, and it only got her more pissed.
He groaned, hopping onto the couch, grabbing the nearby remote, and began flipping through the channels, having been left with no choice.
“It’s the Darin—”
*click*
“She got absolutely mad at me for no reason!”
“And how does that make you feeeeel?”
*click*
“Y’know, Joe, you could always just talk to her aga—”
*click*
“Banan—”
*click*
“Have a douchebag friend? Trying to find a way to ditch them? Well it sounds like you need—”
Jorge pressed the button one final time, muttering to himself all the while. “I’ll find it again if Ish does something retarded…”
“You don’t think she hates me, do you, Speedy Silver?”
“Not at all, Golden Corral, do you think after all that time you two have been together, she’s gonna leave you over something so basic?”
“But she thinks I cheated on h—”
“Have you?”
“No!”
“Exactly!” Speedy poked Golden’s head. “I say you get back over there, and you show her how much you still love her!”
“You seriously think that’ll work?” Golden raised an eyebrow. “I mean… I’m not su—”
“Of course it’ll work!” Speedy reassured Golden with a pat on the back. “Trust me.”
With the push of a button, the TV turned off, leaving Jorge in the dark room, alone. During this period of time, he was able to think more clearly on what he should do next. When he could’ve used the TV’s advice the most, it played a rip off of Dr. Phil talking about a topic completely unrelated to his situation. Now when he’s been yelled at and tossed into the couch, he’s given the TV’s magical advice.
After more contemplating, a lightbulb lit up in his head.
“I know what I must do.”
Dash laid in bed, wrapped in blankets, ignoring the fact that Linda was casually rolled up into a ball next to her. She began thinking about how she acted earlier towards her husband, while involuntarily rubbing her pregnant belly.
“Maybe I was a little too harsh…” She thought aloud. “He was probably telling the truth… And I didn’t believe him…”
“But… if what he said was true…” She stopped rubbing her stomach. “Then Shadow pulled a pretty bad move…”
Unfortunately for her, her thoughts were cut short, as she quickly heard the creaking sound of the door being slowly opened. She looked at the door, watching as her husband sheepishly poked his head into the room.
“J-Jorge…?” She raised an eyebrow, lifting herself up so she was sitting on the bed. “What’re you doing?”
Jorge hesitated, before quickly speaking up. “I… uh… I came to apologize.”
“For?”
“...You’re right... I should’ve said something, or left a note before I let Shadow dragged me out to Cloudsdale…”
“N-No, Jorge… Don’t be silly…” Dash shook her head. “You didn’t expect Shadow to come and just forcefully drag you out of your home… It’s my fault for thinking the worse possible scenario…”
“Aw, c’mon Dashie…” Jorge pouted at the mare. “Don’t beat yourself up…”
“It’s these damn hormones…” Dash sighed. “One minute I’m all happy and sappy for you… And the next minute I turn into Twilight when her hormones keep her in a demonic rage.”
“Well, you’ve been fine so far…” Jorge shrugged. “If anything, it’s Shadow’s fault for dragging me all the way to Cloudsdale… I even tried to warn him about leaving you here alone.”
“Yeah, but you can’t help but cut him some slack, anyway…” Dash shrugged back. “What with Twilight’s pregnancy and all…”
“I suppose…”
Dash continued to stare at her husband, only to break her concentration as she looked at the empty spot of their bed. “Hey.” She looked back at him, patting the empty area. “There’s still room for you, if you wanna sleep here with me…”
Jorge immediately looked at her with a smile on his face.
“I’d like that...”
Author's Note
WHOOOO I'M LATE
Today's been extremely busy for me, sorry about that!

//-------------------------------------------------------//
                  Chapter 3-8: Mares Only                  
//-------------------------------------------------------//
Chapter 3-8: Mares Only
“See, Twilight?” Pinkie raised an eyebrow. “I told you I could set up a baby shower!”
“...I gotta admit, Pinkie, at first I had my doubts…” Twilight thought aloud. “But you actually pulled it off!”
“What’s the big deal with baby showers, anyway?” Dash cocked her head to the side. “Aren’t they a waste of time?”
Twilight shook her head. “On the contrary, Rainbow, it’s a normal tradition wherein the pregnant mare’s friends and family all join together to celebrate the foal being born soon!”
“So it’s basically just a reminder that in a few months, we’ll both be suffering from hormones, contractions, and everything that comes with actually giving birth?”
“Personally, I don’t see it that way.” Jorge slowly flew down onto the ground, having just finished putting up one of the banners for the baby shower. “Because during said parties, the aforementioned friends and family usually bring gifts specifically for the foal.” He paused for a moment, rethinking his statement. “...At least, in my world, anyway…”
“That’s a thing here, too…” Twilight commented.
Jorge looked over to the alicorn mare, realizing something seemingly different about her. “Say… For once, you’re not in a hormonal rage…”
“I’m in a good mood, Jorge.” Twilight deadpanned. “Don’t push it.”
Jorge simply narrowed his eyes, pretending he hadn’t heard Twilight’s “threat”.
“While that sounds cool and all…” Dash chimed back in. “It’s still just a reminder of all the trouble we’ll be going through…”
Jorge shrugged. “If you keep stressing yourself like that, maybe you will have a hard time giving birth.”
“I guess…” Dash shrugged back, softly rubbing one of her forelegs with her other foreleg.
“Now, this usually isn’t part of the normal tradition and all…” Twilight spoke up. “But I think it’d be best to keep the baby shower mares only.”
“HA!” Dash scoffed. “That’s not gonna happen.”
“What do you mean?” Twilight tilted her head to the side.
“You may be fine completely throwing your husband out of your own baby shower.” Dash wrapped a wing around her husband, whom was standing next to her. “But I’m not leaving mine behind.”
“Why?” Twilight raised an eyebrow.
“I neeeeeeed him!” Dash immediately climbed up on top of her husband’s back, wrapping her hooves around his waist. “I don’t feel as comfortable as I normally do without him!”
“But...”
“No buts!” Dash interrupted loudly, but not loud enough to destroy her husband’s ears as she continued to lay on top of him. “Jorge comes with me. End of discussion.”
“B-But—!”
“As much as I don’t want to get in the middle, you clearly don’t realise that once Dash has her mind set on something, there’s no changing her mind.” Jorge shook his head. “I had to learn that the hard way… Multiple times…”
“Hey!” Dash gently slapped the top of her husband’s head with a wing. “I’m still here, y’know!”
“Ugh.” Twilight groaned. “Fine, you can bring Jorge…”
“Yes!” Dash squeed, tightening her grip on her cuban.
“Mares only…” Shining scoffed. “Jorge’s there. Since when was he a mare?”
“I think Dash argued with Twilight about letting Jorge come, or something.” Shadow shrugged. “Hell if I care, what am I gonna do at a party where the majority of the guests are all mares talking about mare things?”
“True…” Shining nodded softly. “So, what do we do until their party’s over?”
Shadow paused for a moment. “Shit. I didn’t plan that far…”
“Good job…” Shining rolled his eyes.
“Oh yeah?” Shadow raised an eyebrow. “And what do you have in mind, hm?”
“Lots of things!” Shining scoffed. “I’m chock full of ideas!”
“Such as?”
Shining blinked. “Uh…” He placed a hoof on his chin. “Uh…”
“Exactly.” Shadow chuckled.
“Actually…!” A lightbulb lit up in Shining’s head. “I remember hearing from a few guards about this supposedly ‘really cool bar’ not far from Ponyville…”
“Oh?” Shadow cocked his head to the side.
“Yeah.” Shining nodded. “I mean, I’m not one hundred percent sure where exactly it is. But, I have a basic idea…”
Shadow shrugged. “Lead the way.”
As they finally made it past the outskirts of Ponyville, Shining and Shadow had finally arrived in front of the bar.
“Geez…” Shadow groaned. “I thought it was on the other side of town. Not out of town…”
“Relax…” Shining shrugged it off. “It may have took us a while to find it, but we did!”
“I guess…” Shadow scratched the back of his head, eyeing the bar. He pointed at the bar’s logo that was placed above the doors. “...Why are they flashing all the different colors of the rainbow?”
“It’s probably just a decoration thing.” Shining shrugged. “It’s no big deal.”
“If you say so…”
As the two stallions walked into the bar, they noticed that things like the bar stools and table tops were colored in a similar fashion to the sign they saw outside. The furniture spread around to room was similarly colorful, and mostly looked plush, as well as a few beanbag chairs scattered around, which seemed to be an odd choice of furniture for a bar. Beyond the colorful interior and questionable furniture, the bar didn’t seem very extraordinary, but it seemed it could fit the description of ‘a really cool bar’.
The two simply stood still, taking in the entire scene they had been bestowed upon.
“Looks pretty interesting, wouldn’t you say, Shadow?” Shining nudged his brother-in-law.
Shadow kept a sharp eye, analysing the entire bar. While he hadn’t found much out of the ordinary, there was only one thing that stuck out as strange.
“Uh…” Shadow nudged Shining back. “Why is there a stallion over there… pole dancing?”
Shining looked over at the stallion, and shrugged. “Dunno.”
Shadow narrowed his eyes, checking around for anything else out of the ordinary.
In an instant, Shadow widened his eyes, pointing off into the distance. “Wait a minute… Is that... Discord!?”
Shining’s eyes shot wide open, looking at the draconequus his brother-in-law called out. “Sweet mother of Celestia… It really is Discord!”
Upon hearing his name twice, Discord looked over to the entrance of the bar, noticing the two stallions standing there, pointing at him.
In an instant, he appeared directly in front of them. “Shining Armor! What a surprise to see you here!” He looked over to the canadian. “And ‘worst nightmare’! What’re you two doing here?”
“You still remember that? You son of a bi—”
“Of course I remember!” Discord interrupted. “How could I forget the name of the cuban’s best friend?”
“That’s not my name th—”
“I’m fully aware of that, Shadow.” Discord crossed his claw and paw together. “If only you were a hedgehog, then I would be able to effectively use this other joke I had in mind.”
“I’ve probably heard it before…” Shadow rolled his eyes.
“I’ve got a better question…” Shining cut in. “What are you doing here, Discord?”
“Oh.” Discord chuckled. “I’m merely here to… How did Ishtaba put it…” He placed a thinking claw on his chin. “‘Shitpost’ you two.”
“Great.” Shadow nodded sarcastically. “As if I didn’t get enough from the asian himself.”
“...What’s ‘shitpost’ mean?” Shining raised an eyebrow.
“Anyway.” Discord clapped his paw and claw together. “Are you two gentlecolts fully aware of where you are?”
“A bar?” Shadow raised an eyebrow.
“On the contrary…” Discord clenched his paw closed, similar to a human hand, but leaving one finger sticking out, and swaying it side to side. “This bar is special.”
“Special how?” Shining cocked his head to the side.
“The kind of special where only colthuggers and fillyfoolers visit.”
Shining’s face turned blank, trying as hard as he could not to overreact as he finally realized where he had just brought his brother-in-law to.
“Uh…” Shining uttered, trying to remain as monotone as he could. “Now that I look at it again… It makes a lot of sense…”
Shadow, however, was still out of the loop, and tilted his head in confusion. “What makes a lot of sense?”
“Right…” Discord nodded in realization. “You’re not entirely familiar with these pony terms, are you?”
“Er…” Shadow narrowed his eyes. “No…?”
“Hm…” Discord placed a thinking paw on his chin. “What does your world call this again…?” In a matter of seconds, Discord snapped his ‘fingers’ as he remembered. “A ‘gay bar’.”
“SHINING BROUGHT ME TO A GAY BAR!?” Shadow shouted, panicking in fear as the realization had finally sat in his head.
“Haaaaaaaaay~!” Called out overly feminine figure from behind the bar. Stepping out from behind the bar, Shadow realized it was a stallion, wearing a rainbow wig, which looked eerily similar to Rainbow Dash’s mane. “What can a get you, big boys?” The stallion smiled brightly.
Shadow blinked as he saw the stallion in front of him. He looked over at Shining with the biggest deadpan he could muster. “Shining…?”
Shining looked back at his brother-in-law. “Yeah...?”
“WHY THE FUCK DID YOU BRING ME INTO A GAY BAR!?” He slapped Shining’s face with a wing.
“I DIDN’T KNOW IT WAS A GAY BAR!” Shining shouted. “I ONLY HEARD ABOUT IT!”
“DID YOU NOT HEAR THE PART THAT IT WAS A GAY BAR!?”
“Is… something wrong?” The rainbow wig wearing stallion raised an eyebrow.
Shadow blinked, looking back over to the stallion in front of them, immediately recognizing the wig. “Say…” He raised an eyebrow. “That looks a lot like Rainbow Dash’s mane…”
The stallion looked up at the wig. “Oh!” a smile suddenly grew on the stallion’s face. “I’m so glad you noticed! It is a part of our uniform, though. So not many ponies point it out here.”
“No, but… seriously…” Shadow narrowed his eyes. “Why does that look like Rainbow Dash’s mane?”
“Isn’t it obvious?”
“You’re asking me that question? After I just realized I’m standing in a gay bar?”
The stallion’s smile shrunk a bit, realizing what Shadow had meant by that. “Well. It’s because it’s a recreation of the Rainbow Dash’s mane.”
“But why?”
“Oh.” The stallion blinked. “It’s mostly because of the founder of this fabulous place took such inspiration for such a famous celebrity like her to proudly show off her true colors!”
Shadow paused for a moment. Letting that statement sink into his head as he tried to process what he had just heard.
“...Are you implying that Rainbow’s a... ‘fillyfooler’?” Shadow raised an eyebrow.
“She’s not?” The stallion raised an eyebrow, gawking in shock.
“As far as I remember…” Shadow placed a hoof on his chin. “No. She’s actually one hundred percent straight. And married.”
“Huh…” The stallion blinked. “Then she must really be supportiv—”
“That’s her natural mane…”
“It’s…” The stallion paused for a second, taking in Shadow’s words. “What?”
“Yeah.” Shadow deadpanned. “That mane of hers? That’s not something she dyed… That shit would’ve been hell to maintain… That’s something she was born with.”
“But…” The stallion’s eyes began to water. “S-She was my inspiration to come out…”
“W-Well… I mean…” Shadow quickly tried to prevent a large scene from being created. “You guys still have the whole ‘rainbow’ thing going for ya… Rainbow Dash was kinda just a coincidence for you guys...”
All the while, Shining and Discord simply stood still, watching this scene take place before them, speechless.
“B-But…” The stallion sniffled. “If she’s so straight… Then who exactly did she get married to?”
“Oh. No one hugely famous, or anything…” Shadow scoffed. “Unless you count J— wait… what did he first call himself? Riiiight. Godson, the first human in Equestria. As not hugely famous…”
“HIM!?” The stallion shrieked in horror. “But he’s so…”
Discord immediately knew what to say next. “Retar—”
“Retarded!”
“Fine…” Discord crossed his claw and paw together. “Interrupt me as I say things… Not like I care…”
Shadow quickly came to his friend’s defence. “Well, I wouldn’t say he’s retar—”
“The price is rice.”
“Oh…” Shining blinked. “He knows about the price is rice…”
“I’m pretty sure everypony is aware of the price is rice…” The stallion deadpanned. “What I want to know is how, like, some… thing like him got hitched to someone like her?”
“An insanely huge amount of random luck, and turning into a pony.”
The stallion blinked. “He did what now?”
“He asked Princess Twilight, his friend, for a favor.” Shadow explained. “Though, I will add that Jorge isn’t as retarded as he used to act.”
“He acted retarded?” The stallion blinked. “On purpose?”
Shadow nodded.
“But why?”
“Because he thought it’d be funny for a while.” Shadow shrugged. “I dunno. Ask him yourself.”
“Pfft.” The stallion scoffed. “Please, as if I could even come face to face with him. He’s just as big of a celebrity as Rainbow I—”
“Can I just stop you right there? I mean... you’re talking to two princes right now…” Shadow reiterated. “If anything, we’re bigger celebrities than they are.”
The stallion blinked for a moment, eyeing the two stallions thoroughly.
“OH MY GOSH!” The stallion shouted. “SHINING ARMOR AND SHADOW!! I CAN’T BELIEVE I DIDN’T NOTICE IT AT FIRST!”
Shadow rolled his eyes.
“Omigosh, Wait!” The stallion paused for a second. “Does this mean you two, like, know them?”
“Listen to this guy…” Shining nudged Shadow softly. “Do we know Rainbow Dash and Jorge?”
“Heh…” Shadow chuckled. “Funny that you should ask… Because I just so happen to be Jorge’s best friend…”
“Seriously. Do you not watch the news anymore, or something?” Discord bluntly cut in.
“Really? I didn’t know you guys had such a close connection to them!” The stallion beamed. “I mean, I know Princess Twilight is, like, Shining’s sister and all, but like, I didn’t think you guys were so close with everyone else!”
“Nah… We’re only just friends with Shining’s sister’s friends… That’s all…”
“Oh…” The stallion blinked. “Duh. That makes perfect sense…”
Shadow waited for a moment for anyone else to say anything. Only for a lightbulb to go off in his head.
“Tell you what… er…” Shadow blinked, realizing the stallion never mentioned his name. “What’s your name again?”
“Glitter Rain”
“Right. Glitter Rain... Tell you what, what if I told you I could get you a chance to actually meet Rainbow Dash?”
“REALLY?!” Glitter bounced up and down like a little filly. “THAT WOULD BE, LIKE, SOOOOO AMAZING!”
“Mhm.” Shadow nodded. “Hell. I bet I know a guy who would love to visit this place…”
Jorge opened the door to Twilight’s castle, preparing the exit for him and his wife to easily navigate through, only to find a brown stallion wearing a rainbow mane in front of him.
“Uh…” Jorge raised an eyebrow. “...May I help you?”
Glitter narrowed his eyes, recognizing the voice. “Aren’t you… that ‘first human in Equestria’ dude?”
“Uh... Yeah.” Jorge blinked. “I mean… I’m pretty sure no one really pays much attention to me, but, uh—”
“Huh… You look weird as a pony…”
“I’ve been a pony for about eight months now… And it’s only until now someone outside of my friends makes a comment about it?”
“Well, that, and the price is rice was dumb.”
Jorge’s eyes widened, having been completely caught off guard. “The what was what now?”
“You don’t remember that ‘price is rice’ thing you did, like, a few years ago?”
“You mean that thing I did in Canterlot when Celestia did that thing to introduce humans to Equestria?”
“Yeah! That!”
“Oh. Yeah. Of course it was dumb.” Jorge nodded. “I didn’t feel like participating in that event, so I kinda just decided to do something stupid to be more entertaining since I was forced to do it.”
“Oh…” Glitter uttered, finding a way to change the subject quickly. “Well… Uh… Is Rainbow Dash here?”
“Er… Yeah.” Jorge nodded. “We were about to head back home after we grabbed all our presents from the baby shower we just had…”
“I se—Baby shower?” Glitter’s eyes shot wide open. “Rainbow Dash is pregnant!?”
“Yeah…” Jorge blinked. “Do you… y’know, not watch the news? I’m pretty sure this kind of thing was on newspapers and stuff…”
“Do you two know the gender yet!?” Glitter gawked in awe.
“Is it cool if I don’t answer that?” Jorge raised an eyebrow. “‘Kay? ‘Kay. I’m just gonna go grab my wife and head back home, now...”
“W-Wait!” Glitter interrupted. “Do you think I could meet her?”
“Dash?”
“Yeah!”
Jorge paused for a moment, looking once more at the rainbow wig, realizing how closed it resembled his wife’s own mane.
“Uh…” He uttered. “I mean, I was about to go grab her and leave, but if you wanna meet her real quick… I could just ask her to come here real quick...”
“Please?” Glitter looked at him with a fangirl-ish smile. “That would, like, make my day!”
Jorge simply turned around, keeping a blank face, and walking over to his wife, who was still talking to her friends a few rooms away.
“So, Jorge and I went for a checkup a few days ago… And we found out what the foal’s gonna be!”
“Dash?”
“Hm?” Dash raised an eyebrow, turning her head to face her husband. “Heya! You’re just in time for the big announcement!”
“As much as I don’t want to interrupt this huge moment…” Jorge scratched the back of his head. “There’s another one of your crazy fans by the door.”
“Define ‘crazy fan’...”
“He’s wearing a wig that looks just like your mane.”
“Oh geez… Not another one…”

//-------------------------------------------------------//
       Chapter 3-9: "Beast of the Everfree" (Pt. 1)        
//-------------------------------------------------------//
Chapter 3-9: "Beast of the Everfree" (Pt. 1)
*Knock Knock Knock!*
“I got it, Dash!”
Once Jorge quickly ran up to his door, he opened it softly, instantly narrowing his eyes with a groan upon whom he found standing behind it.
“Where the fuck is Shadow?”
“Ish…” Jorge rolled his eyes. “For the tenth time… This is my house. Shadow lives in a castle.”
“Shadow lives in a castle?” Ish raised an eyebrow. “When the fuck did this happen?”
“Ever since the castle appeared out of nowhere after all of Tirek’s bullshit, remember?” Jorge explained.
“Who’s bullshit?”
Jorge deadpanned. “That time you decided you were Batm—”
“OH! THAT ASSHOLE!” Ish shouted in realization. “Yeah, I remember now.”
“How could you forget a day as eventful as that?”
“I don’t fucking know, I’m a busy man.” Ish crossed his arms. “You expect me to remember every single fucking detail of my life?”
“...How can you remember your own name at this point?”
Ish scoffed. “Jorge, I’m not fucking retarded. How the hell am I gonna forget my own damn name?”
Jorge blankly stared at the asian in front of him. “Y’know what? I give up.” He pointed in the direction of Twilight’s castle. “You know where their castle is, go over there and bug them yourself.”
“Aight. Whatever.” Ish shrugged, preparing to walk away, only to remember a thought he had. “Oh, speaking of which, I’mma go camping in the Everfree Forest for about a week.”
“Why?” Jorge raised an eyebrow. “Haven’t you heard of all the weird shit that goes on in there?”
“So?” Ish cocked his head to the side. “Does it look like I give a shit?”
“No, I suppose not.” Jorge shook his head. “Whatever.” He shrugged. “Go nuts, I guess.”
“You’ll see, Jorge…” Ish smirked. “I’ll be going in a meme prince. And when I come out, I’ll be a meme lor—”
*SLAM!*
Jorge rolled his eyes. “I couldn’t care less…”
“Jorge! Help me assemble this freakin’ crib!”
“Coming, Dashie!”
“SHADOWWWWWWW!”
“THE FUCK YOU WANT!?” Shadow poked his head through the doors as he angrily shouted at the asian.
“Oh. You’re here.” Ish blinked. “I just wanted to let you know that I’mma go camping with Cryo in the Everfree Forest for about a week.”
“And?”
“Well, I figured you and Jorge would actually give a shit to hear that.” Ish explained. “Just think about it, Shadow… I’ll be going in a wimpy little prince of memes… When I return… I’ll be the greatest man of a meme lord anyone will have ever seen!”
“Ish, if anything, Jorge and I are probably more men than you are.”
“No. That would imply you and Jorge are actually human.” Ish shook his head.
“But… We are human.”
“No.” Ish shook his head once more. “Your wife is a horse, your kid’s gonna be a horse, your friends are horses. So what does that make you?”
“Uh… A human with a pony bod—”
“A horse, Shadow. A horse.” Ish interrupted. “There’s no going around it. You gave up your life as a normal human being to be a horse.”
Shadow narrowed his eyes. “Ish, I will punch yo—”
“No need to thank me for helping you realize your errors, Shadow.” Ish smirked, giving Shadow a thumbs-up. “It’s just what I do.”
“Mkay, y’know what? I don’t have time for this.” Shadow rolled his eyes. “Twilight’s going nuts about the foal’s room, and I’d rather go help her with that than to deal with this bullshit.”
“That’s offensi—”
*SLAM!*
Three weeks later…
“Need to prepare for the final episode of Daring Do? Tomorrow at 8, the Daring Do ‘watch-em-all’ marathon will—”
“We’ve seen all the episodes already... “ Dash groaned, tightening her hold on her husband as she cuddled him to death on the couch. “Twice.”
“They’re only trying to make sure all the fans who aren’t as hardcore as you are remember what’s going on before they finally end the show.” Jorge explained. “Cut them some slack.”
“Meh, I guess.”
*click*
“Today on the cooking channe—”
*click*
“Is YOUR house being invaded by the ‘Beast of the Everfree’? Find out more on the story in just a few minutes!”
“Beast of the Everfree, eh?” Jorge raised an eyebrow. “Sounds as dumb as the lochness monster…”
“The what?” Dash raised an eyebrow?
Jorge blinked. “Uh. An urban legend from my world.”
“So basically what you’re saying is that this ‘Beast of the Everfree’ is as fake your world’s ‘lochness monster’?” Dash queried.
“Exactly!” Jorge nodded. “That’s exactly what it is!”
“Considering all the stuff we’ve seen, Jorge…” Dash nuzzled into his chest. “I wouldn’t call it fake just yet…”
“But it even has a ‘urban legend’ sounding name!” Jorge retorted. “‘Beast of the Everfree’! I mean, c’mon!”
Dash groaned softly, closing her eyes as she continued to use her husband as an oversized pillow. “Whatever you say, Jorge…”
Jorge took notice of his waifu’s sleepy behavior, and drew his focus away from the TV to look down at the snuggly mare.
He smiled softly. “Dash?”
Dash’s ear twitched at the sound of her name, indicating her attention to him being given.
“Why are you so adorable?”
“Hm?” Dash lifted her head from his chest, looking up at him. “That’s a new one…”
“What do you mean?”
“Jorge, in the almost three years we’ve been together, you’ve called me many things…” Dash explained. “Cute, beautiful, hot, drop dead gorgeous, just to name a few…” Dash snickered. “But adorable? That’s a first.”
“But you are…” Jorge snickered back. “The things you do sometimes are just too cute…”
“Like what?” Dash raised an eyebrow.
“Well, for example—”
“‘SUP BITCHES?” Shadow bursted through their door, shouting all the while. “...And Dash.”
Jorge and Dash simply froze in place, slowly turning their head over to the gray pegasus.
“...Is this a bad time?” Shadow sheepishly smiled.
“Do you want to have a bad time?” Jorge narrowed his eyes.
“...Will I enjoy said bad time?”
“What part of ‘bad time’ sounds like you would enjoy it in any way, shape, or form?”
“Well, there was this one time Cadance—”
“Forget I asked…” Jorge interrupted. “What do you want, Shadow?”
“Fuck if I know.” Shadow shrugged. “I wanted to see what you two were up to, but I can clearly see you two are getting ready to make more babies…”
Dash deadpanned. “I’m still pregnant, though…”
“Exactly.” Shadow smirked.
Dash and Jorge simply rolled their eyes at Shadow’s comment, drawing their attention back to the TV.
“Now, what did you say the beast looked like?” The news reporter reached the microphone to Bonbon, who was one of the witnesses who claimed to have seen the monster.
“Well, it was tall… but it seemed to slouch a lot… and It walked on two legs… That’s all I can remember.”
“Hey…” Shadow muttered. “Where’s Linda?”
“At Fluttershy’s.” Jorge responded bluntly, shushing the canadian.
“Can you describe any events relating to the beast?”
“Other than the fact that it was in my house last night, trying to take some of my household items while I was away… Not really.”
“And how did you know it was stealing your things while you were away?”
“I had forgotten something back at home, so I had to quickly run back in, and that’s when… I saw it.”
“Why’s Linda at Fluttershy’s?” Shadow asked.
“Fluttershy wanted to spend the day with her for some reason…” Dash replied, shushing the gray pegasus as well.
“Would you say that the beast only comes out at night in houses left empty?”
“It’s possible.” Bonbon shrugged. “I heard some other ponies say they’ve been robbed while they’ve been gone, but had no clue who it could’ve been.”
The news reporter immediately turned to the camera. “Well you heard it here, first! If you’re not careful, the ‘Beast of the Everfree’ MIGHT just come to your home and steal your things!” The news reporter’s eyes widened, further emphasizing the story. “This has been Channel 10 news on the story, I’m Snappy Scoop, signing off!”
“Speaking of two legged beasts…” Dash began. “Isn’t Ish supposed to be back from his ‘camping’ trip?”
“Ish went on a camping trip?” Shadow raised an eyebrow.
“He was supposed to be camping for about a week, wasn’t he?” Jorge looked back at his wife.
“It’s been three weeks, though…”
“Has it?”
“Yeah...”
“Really?” Jorge blinked. “Huh, must've lost track of time...”
“Really!?” Dash shouted. “You completely lost track of time since your own friend’s been missing?!”
“This is Ish we’re talking about, though…”
“Oh, right…”
Shadow huffed, tapping on the floor. “Are you guys just ignoring me?”
“BREAKING NEWS!”
“Oh for crying out loud!” Shadow groaned in defeat. “Now even the TV’s talking over me!”
“Ponies have been randomly finding barrels in the river full of random objects, most of which have been claimed by their owners!” The news reporter explained. “Could this be the work of the ‘Beast of the Everfree’? Or is there some sort of deeper meaning into this? Could it be the work of this ‘Meme Inc’ written on the barrels? We’ll let you know once we have the full scoop!”
In an instant, Jorge and Shadow had cracked the case. “Ish…” They both said in unison.
Dash blinked, looking away from the TV to her husband. “Ish will do just about anything, won’t he?”
“Dash, he’d be gay for the right amount of money.” Shadow commented. “Ish will do anything, as long as he has a motivation.”
“The question is…” Jorge narrowed his eyes. “...What’s his motivation for this?”
“Hell if I know.” Shadow shrugged. “Nor do I care, it doesn’t really bother me.”
“Meh, doesn’t bother me either.” Jorge added.
“So we’re just gonna let this keep happening?” Dash raised an eyebrow. “I mean… shouldn’t we do something about it?”
“Eh…” Shadow uttered.
“Nah.” Jorge shook his head. “As long as he’s not bothering us, it’s not really our problem…”
“Hm…” Dash pondered the thought, only to nod seconds later. “Good point.”
“Jorge...It always becomes our problem in the end…” Shadow -
“When it does, then we’ll worry about it.”
“Fair enough.”
“Dad?” Cryo raised an eyebrow. “Is something wrong?”
“For the tenth time… I told you not to call me Dad…” Ish sighed. “It makes me feel old…”
“But… You are my dad…”
“As much of a good point you make, it still feels weird being called that.” Ish disregarded Cryo’s comment. “Call me ‘Ish’, or ‘bro’, or ‘sir’, or ‘grand master of all memes’.” He shrugged. “Whichever’s better for you.”
“Can’t I just call you Dad?” Cryo cocked his head to the side.
“...Fine.” Ish groaned. “Just not in public.”
“Deal.” Cryo nodded.
“You’re right about one thing, though.” Ish crossed his arms. “Something is wrong…”
“What is it?”
“I sense a disturbance in the force…”
“What kind of disturbance?”
“Jorge and Shadow aren’t giving a shit about me anymore…” Ish explained. “I can feel it…”
“So?”
“I need to make them careeee.”
“How are you gonna do that, Dad?”
“I’m going to shitpost them.”
One week later…
“You’d think Ish would be bored of camping, already…” Shadow noted, continuing along his walk with his cuban friend. “It’s been a full month since he’s been gone…”
“Who cares?” Jorge raised an eyebrow. “This is been the longest we’ve been in peace and quiet, away from Ish…”
“I guess…” Shadow shrugged. “I just have a feeling that something gonna come bite us in the ass soon…”
“I doubt it.” Jorge shrugged as well. “This is Ishtaba we’re talking about. He’s not the kind of guy to put any effort into anything…”
“Well, you’re not wrong about that…” Shadow nodded. “But, like—”
“Say, isn’t that one of Ish’s barrels?” Jorge interrupted, walking over to the nearby river.
Shadow simply sighed, following suit. “Does it say ‘Meme Inc’ on it?”
“Yeah.” Jorge stopped the barrel from flowing, pulling it up onto the ground. “It looks like it’s just full of paper, though…”
“Paper?” Shadow raised an eyebrow, walking up to the barrel. “Anything written on them?”
Jorge grabbed one of the papers lying in the barrel, reading what it had written on it. In an instant, the cuban grew a look of disappointment after reading the entire thing.
“I’m gonna take that look as a yes.”
Jorge simply remained silent, handing the piece of paper over to Shadow, who grabbed it and took a look for himself.
“Hi guys my name is Elyse (with an X) I'm 18 years young, and I sexually identify as a bathroom sign. I'm bipolar (self diagnosed, of course) trans-handicapped, trans-ethnic. And I love African American coffee.”
Moments later, Shadow grew the same look of disappointment that Jorge had worn just moments ago. Meanwhile, Jorge had gotten another piece of paper, checking to see if it had the same thing written on all of them, or different messages throughout the entire barrel.
“Sodium, atomic number 11, was first isolated by Jorge in 1807. A chemical component of salt, he named it Na in honor of the saltiest region on earth, North America.” Jorge read aloud.
“That’s what it says?” Shadow raised an eyebrow. “Does Ish really have nothing else better to do?”
“Look at this one…” Jorge grabbed another piece of paper, reading it out loud as well. “Shadow, this is the mayor of Canadaland. We need you home my son. Ever since you left us, our salt mines have been running dry. No one is providing these poor hard-working people with the table salt they deserve for their daily meals.”
“For fucks sake…” Shadow groaned.
“You know what this means, right?” Jorge looked up at the canadian.
“Time to go asian hunting?” Shadow tilted his head to the side.
“Exactly.” Jorge nodded.
“Great…” Shadow sighed. “Time to waste more time of our lives because of something stupid that Ish has done… again…”
“We’re gonna need to go shopping for some supplies, first.”
“Why?”
“We’re going into the Everfree Forest, are you not aware of the freaky shit that happens in there?”
“Riiiight.”
“Prepare a mental note, we’re gonna need a few things.”
“Such as?”
“A map, a compass, some trail mix so we can leave a trail behind in case we get lost, and a new bat.”
“...Didn’t I already buy you a new bat?”
“A bigger bat.”
“God dammit Jorge…” Shadow facehoofed. “You’re gonna have to be the one to explain the purchase to Celestia this time…”
“Just tell sunbutt that I used the last bat you bought me to indulge Dash’s sexual fantasies.”
“You did what now?”
“I’m making shit up, Shadow.” Jorge rolled his eyes. “Do you really think I’d beat my wife with a bat?”
“No, I was actually thinking you were shoving the bat up Dash’s—”
“FORGET I ASKED!”
Meanwhile…
“Cryo, you ever get the feeling you’re about to get your ass whooped?”
“No?”
“Good, because I don’t either.”

//-------------------------------------------------------//
       Chapter 3-10: "Beast of the Everfree" (Pt. 2)       
//-------------------------------------------------------//
Chapter 3-10: "Beast of the Everfree" (Pt. 2)
“Uh… Shadow?”
“Yeah…?”
“Is it just me… Or does the Everfree Forest look creepy as all hell?”
“It’s not just you…” Shadow shook his head. “That’s definitely some creepy shit.”
“How the hell did Ish go camping in there?” Jorge raised an eyebrow. “Just look at it!”
Shadow sighed with a shrug. “Let’s just get this over with…” He simply continued walking, not caring of the possible dangers that could be lying hidden inside the forest.
Jorge hesitated for a moment, debating whether or not he wanted to follow Shadow into the forest. He simply stood still and watched as his best friend continued to walk in alone, seemingly fearless of what’s in store.
Shadow paused, turning his head back to the cuban. He raised an eyebrow. “What’re you doing standing around, for?” He nudged his head towards the forest. “What happened to the cuban who wanted to beat the living shit outta Ish with that bat that I just bought specifically to beat him with?”
Jorge scratched the back of his head, his mental debate still going.
“Jorge, absolutely nothing will hurt us in there.” Shadow deadpanned. “We’ve literally had to stall Tirek once, remember?”
“Y-Yeah…” Jorge nodded, slowly trying to mask his fear.
“You practically stared death in the face, remember?”
“Yeah…”
“So then the fuck are you scared of!?” Shadow raised an eyebrow, stomping a hoof on the ground to emphasize his point.
“You’re… You’re right!” Jorge stood strong, masking his fears with his confidence. “If I lived through Tirek’s bullshit, I can handle anything!”
“Well, I wouldn’t say anyth—”
“C’mon, Shadow! We got an asian to hunt!”
“There it is again, that feeling someone wants to kill you…”
“I thought you said you don’t get those?”
“I lied, now hurry up and pack up the tent, we have deadlines to meet.”
Jorge and Shadow continued on their path inside the forest. Shadow had simply ignored all the creepy vibes that was thrown by the entire forest around them.
Jorge, however, simply shook with every step he took.
“I… I’m starting to regret my decision…”
“Already?” Shadow raised an eyebrow. “Jeez, Jorge. Don’t be such a wuss.”
“I’m a wuss?” Jorge raised an eyebrow at the canadian. “Well, gee, excuse me for having legitimate fears about a place that has quite a lot of weird and creepy shit in it!”
“It’s just a forest, Jorge…”
“Just a forest?” Jorge’s eyes widened. “Are you not aware of what happens in this forest?”
“No?”
“You know how clouds are only moved by pegasi and all that, right?” Jorge queried. “Like, they never move.”
“Yeah…”
“They move on their own. Here. In this forest.”
“Alright, so clouds move on their own, big deal.”
“Plants somehow sustain life in here. No one’s ever around to actually take care of them.”
“That’s easily explainable with the self-moving clouds...”
“Alright, then how about the cockatrice?”
Shadow paused right in his tracks. “The what?” He asked.
“There’s like… this weird creature that has the body of a snake, and the head of a chicken.”
“Alright, so it has some freaky shit. Big de—”
“And if you stare into its eyes, or vice versa, you’ll be turned into stone.”
“...Okay, fuck.”
“Don’t even get me started on—”
“I’ve heard enough, Jorge...” Shadow sighed. “The sooner we find ish, the sooner we can get the fuck outta here…”
They continued with their asian hunt. Shadow seemingly beginning to worry what else was in this forest, but refused to listen to Jorge to avoid becoming more frightened by these strange creatures. And while Jorge was still shaking with every step he took, Shadow walked by his side, which seemed to help calm him down just a bit.
Jorge kept a careful eye around the forest, making sure there would be nothing that would catch him off guard. He tried to ignore his paranoia as his imagination would place fake objects into his view, leaving him to question whatever he would see is real or not.
In an instant, Jorge saw something in the corner of his eye, and jumped back in fear. “WHAT THE FUCK IS THAT!?”
“WHAT!?” Shadow froze in place, his eyes widening. “WHAT THE FUCK IS WHAT!?”
“THAT!” Jorge pointed at the object he saw earlier. “WHAT THE FUCK IS THAT!?”
Shadow jerked his head to where the cuban was pointing, finding a large, tall object, shrouded in shadows. Being the bravest one out of the two, Shadow slowly took a step closer, trying to get close enough to see what it was without being attacked.
Jorge simply stood in place, his legs shaking immensely as he watched his friend get closer and closer.
Eventually, Shadow was finally able to make out what it was, and simply groaned once he had identified it.
“Jorge… It’s just a tree…”
Jorge blinked. “Right… I knew that…” He smiled sheepishly.
Shadow simply rolled his eyes, and continued on their hunt. With Jorge quickly following suit.
While Shadow was more concerned with finding the asian to end his annoyance, Jorge was dead-set on making sure nothing was lurking in the shadows.
“Dad, what if we walked into a timberwolf? Or the cockatrice? Or even the manticore!?” questioned Cryo while the duo walked along the trail.
“Wait, there are monsters here? Like... this forest wasn’t perfectly safe? As in... we decided to camp in this incredibly dangerous forest for weeks while we could’ve died at any moment?”
“I’ve been trying to tell you that the entire time we’ve been here!”
“We’re out. Nope, not spending another second here. I, I mean yo- WE have so much to live for.”
“But we’re in the middle of the forest. We’ve been walking deeper into it after we packed up camp.”
“Are you implying we’re lost?”
“Uh… Yes…?”
“Fuck.”
Moments later, Jorge interrupted their journey once again.
“Wait!”
“What now, Jorge…?”
“I thought I heard something…”
“Jorge, you’re just paranoid…” Shadow sighed. “It’s nothing, seriously…”
“And this Cryo, is how you sneak up on people”
“But… they can hear you.”
“No, as long as they can’t see me, they can’t hear shit. Trust me.”
“I don’t think that’s how any of this works…”
“But they’re just as, if not stupider than me.”
Cryo blinked. “But ‘stupider’ isn’t even a word!”
“Wait, no..” Shadow raised an eyebrow. “I think I hear it, too…”
Jorge simply stood still, listening closer to the sound of the voices, trying to locate where it was coming from. Once he had gotten a good idea where it was, he immediately turned around, throwing a blind punch directly behind him…
...And right into Ish’s face.
“OW! YOU FUCK! WHAT KIND OF PERSON JUST PUNCHES THE OTHER PERSON TRYING TO SNEAK UP ON THEM!?” Ish shouted as he rubbed his face.
“THE KIND OF PERSON WHO’S TERRIFIED OF THIS FUCKING FOREST!” Jorge shouted back. “YOU BITCH!” He immediately reached for something Shadow had been carrying with him.
“I’M THE BITCH!?” Ish retorted. “I’VE BEEN CAMPING IN THIS PLACE FOR WEE—Wait... is that the bat?” Ish’s eyes immediately widened. “FOR THE LOVE OF GOD! ANYTHING BUT THE BAT!” He watched as Jorge prepared to swing. “JORGE NO, WE’RE FRIENDS!”
“THIS IS WHAT HAPPENS WHEN YOU SCARE THE SHIT OUT A CUBAN, YOU BITCH!”
“FUCK THAT, CRYO WE’RE BAILING!” Ish immediately picked up Cryo, bolting from the two pegasi.
“YOU’RE NOT RUNNING AWAY THAT EASILY!” Jorge flared his wings open, immediately taking off to chase the human.
Shadow blinked, immediately realizing that he would be left alone if he didn’t go and follow.
“JORGE! YOU FUCK! WAIT FOR ME!”
“Breaking news!”
Dash peeked her head from the kitchen as she prepared herself a quick snack. “What now…?”
“It appears we’ve finally seen an end to these ‘Meme Inc’ barrels!”
Dash walked out of the kitchen entirely, walking a little closer to the TV. “Huh?” She raised an eyebrow.
“The final barrel randomly appeared in the river earlier today, with local human Ishtaba tied up in rope inside it!”
Dash’s eyes widened in shock.
“Along with Ishtaba trapped inside the ‘Meme Inc’ barrel. There was also a note inside the barrel, written and left by Prince Shadow himself!”
Dash’s reaction slowly dimmed down to normal. “Ah. That explains it…”
Snappy grabbed the note, preparing to read it aloud to the camera. “Here lies Ishtaba, your ‘Beast of the Everfree’. Fueled by his boredom, he pretended to play a prank on all of Ponyville. And after a while, Jorge and I had finally realized that it was him all along. Once we knew, we immediately looked for him, hunting him down until his prank was over. This is his punishment. To be humiliated in the news in front of potentially thousands of ponies all over Equestria. Hopefully this will teach him not to anger us again.”
Snappy Scoop slowly put down the note, staying silent for a moment.
“Well… You heard it here, first…” She paused once again. “This has been Channel 10 news on the story... I’m Snappy Scoop, signing off.”
“You really think that’ll teach him a lesson?” Jorge asked.
“No.” Shadow shook his head. “But that’ll at least make him think before he does something stupid again…”
“I suppose…”
“Also, thanks for agreeing to foalsitting Cryo for the night for me…” Shadow smiled. “I’d rather not bother Twilight with someone else running around. Especially now that she’s finally began calm down more…”
“Bah, it’s no big deal.” Jorge scoffed. “I’m pretty sure Cryo could use a break from Ish after that entire camping trip…” He looked over to the colt who had been sleeping on his back the entire time.
“You sure you’ll be able to handle him?” Shadow raised an eyebrow.
“He seems like a pretty chill kid, and from the few times I’ve passed by the two, he actually seems to be smarter than Ish.” Jorge chuckled. “So, I believe there’s still some hope for this kid, even if he is being raised by Ishtaba.”
Shadow looked at the sleeping colt, and smiled over the adorable sight. “Y’know, Jorge… I told Ish that if he’d ever screw up in terms of being a parent for him, that I’d take him back to orphanage…” He scratched the back of his neck. “I… I don’t think I can do that if Ish ever does screw up now…”
“You think camping with him for weeks wasn't a bad parent move?”
“Not enough to warrant taking the foal away from him, no.” Shadow shook his head. “He's done worse things before. I'm waiting for one of those worse things to happen.”
Jorge looked over to the colt again, then back to Shadow. “If Ish screws up. And I know he’ll screw up… We’ll think of something.”
Shadow modded, pausing for a moment as a thought came to him. “...Do you think Ish will ever clean up his bullshit? And actually try to be a human being?”
“I… don’t know.” Jorge shook his head. “That’s something Ish is gonna have to do on his own…”
Shadow looked down, thinking to himself. “We may have to considering taking the foal in… If Ish ever screws up…”
Jorge closed his eyes, sighing deeply as he listened to his friend’s concerns. “Let’s… not jump to conclusions so fast.” He shook his head, opening his eyes again to look his friend in the face. “We still have our own foals to worry about, and they’re not even born yet. Just… give it some time, alright?”
Shadow slowly nodded in response. “You’re right. We’ll see what happens as time goes on.”
Jorge nodded, walking towards his house. “I will say this, though…” He smirked. “If Cryo ends up enjoying spending the night with us tonight. He’ll be more than welcome than to spend the night whenever he wants.”
Shadow smiled warmly at the cuban’s kindness. “I don’t see why you were so worked up about trying to care for your own foals, when you’re doing a perfectly good job at taking care of Ish’s…”
Jorge blinked, realizing how right Shadow was. “Wow… I… I didn't realize—”
“I can already tell you’ll be a great father, Jorge…” Shadow chuckled. “You’ve been worrying all this time for nothing…”
Jorge chuckled back at his friend’s comment, and smiled. “Thanks, Shadow…”
Shadow nodded softly, watching as his friend slowly entered his home.
As soon as the door closed with a soft, yet audible click, he sighed.
“Let’s hope I can do as good of a job as you can…”
Author's Note
Only two chapters left to go~!

//-------------------------------------------------------//
            Chapter 3-11: An Unexpected Arrival            
//-------------------------------------------------------//
Chapter 3-11: An Unexpected Arrival
“Uncle Jorge?”
”Uncle Jorgeee…”
”Uncle Jorge…?”
Soon enough, Cryo heard a soft groan, though not from the stallion he had tried to wake up. He looked over to the prismatic maned mare who had been sleeping next to him, watching as she slowly lifted her head, gently rubbing her eye as her deep slumber had been interrupted.
“Cryo…?” Dash muttered, her eyes struggling to stay open. “What’s the matter?”
“I’m trying to wake up Uncle Jorge.” Cryo softly tapped the cuban, still lost in dreamland.
“Yeah, but…” Dash covered her mouth with a hoof as she tried to hide her soft yawn. “Why?”
“It’s the weekend!” Cryo cheered. “I was hoping we could play a game together!”
Dash groaned softly once more. “Cryo… I know this is the first time you spend the night on a weekend…” She laid her head back on her pillow. “But we usually sleep this late since Jorge doesn’t work on the weekends…”
“Aww…” Cryo’s ears flopped back towards the back of his neck. “But I was hoping to play with Uncle Jorge!”
“You will…” Dash muttered. “Just… in a little bit…”
Cryo watched as the mare fell back asleep, leaving the colt to groan in frustration. Fueled with the determination to play with ‘Uncle Jorge’, Cryo decided to amp up his attack. He began to start poking the sleeping stallion’s side, he kept poking and poking, until he figured it was ineffective. He then began poking his foreleg, sometimes grabbing it randomly and moving it around in an attempt to make the cuban uncomfortable, unfortunately, that failed too. He then began to poke Jorge’s face, squishing his cheeks, stretching his face around, but to no avail.
He looked over to the sleeping mare again, hoping he could try to get her attention.
“Auntie Rainbowwwww…”
Dash slowly opened a single eyelid, looking at the whining colt.
“Could you wake up Uncle Jorge for me?”
Dash sighed, chuckling a tiny bit at the colt’s adorable determination. “Sure, kid…”
She looked over to her husband, who was very clearly lost in his sleep. She scooted closer to him, and gently shook him. “Babe…” She muttered, receiving an audible groan from him. “Jorge…”
Soon enough, the stallion slowly opened his eyes, his wife being the first thing he saw. “Hm…?”
“Cryo’s been trying to wake you up…” She laid her head back onto her pillow.
“He has…?” Jorge rubbed his eyes, noticing something weighing down on his side. He looked over to the unknown object, finding the cheerful young colt standing on top of him.
Cryo simply gave the biggest smile he could, completely beaming with excitement as his ‘Uncle Jorge’ had finally awoke.
Jorge chuckled at the adorable sight. But, since it was still too early to wake up, the cuban knew exactly what to do next. He quickly got up, grabbing the young colt, and held him with his hooves as he quickly covered himself with the blankets again.
“Heyyyyy!” Cryo whined. “Lemme go!”
“No way.” Jorge shook his head. “It’s way too early to get up.”
“No it’s noooooot!”
Meanwhile, Dash couldn’t help but laugh softly at the two, as she watched as her husband unintentionally showcased what he’d wind up doing to their foals, once they were Cryo’s age, anyway.
It brought a smile to her face to see that her husband would look like being a great father.
As the two continued to argue, Jorge simply ignored the colt’s squirming and whining, knowing he’d get tired sooner or later. He simply held him close as if Cryo was his own child, not caring about anything else but his needed sleep.
Eventually, the three of them fell asleep once more.
“Jorge’s cooking strikes again!” Dash cheered. “I can never get tired of your french toast!”
“It’s not that hard to make, thou—”
“Don’t ruin the experience for me!”
Jorge shrugged, preparing another plate for Cryo. “You’ve eaten pancakes before, haven’t you, Cryo?”
“Yep!” Cryo nodded. “They’re really good!”
“Then you’re gonna love my french toast!” Jorge smiled, gently placing the plate down onto his side of the table.
Cryo cocked his head to the side, eyeing the mysterious food, then looked over at Rainbow Dash. He hadn’t exactly noticed what french toast was until he got a better look at it on his plate.
“It’s… bread?”
Jorge shook his head. “It’s bread made in a way to taste like pancakes, you can even pour syrup on it and everything like Dash did!”
Cryo blinked, looking over to the bottle of syrup on the center of the table. He looked back at Rainbow, who had been enjoying her breakfast.
“Auntie Rainbow?” He raised an eyebrow. “Could you pass me the syrup, please?” He pointed at rather large bottle. “I can’t reach it…”
Dash gently placed her fork down, looking over to the bottle, and back at Cryo’s plate. She grabbed the barrel, removing the bottle’s cap and pouring some syrup on his plate for him. “There ya go.”
“Thanks Auntie Rainbow!”
Dash couldn’t help but smile at the colt as he began to eat his breakfast, looking over to her husband as he brought his own plate to the table. He looked at his smiling waifu, wondering why she was so happy, she then switched her attention back to Cryo once more, leaving him to look at the colt as well. Once he realized what Dash was smiling at, he couldn’t help but smile too.
All of a sudden, Dash gasped, immediately catching her lover’s attention, he widened his eyes as he jerked his head to look at her.
“Relax…” Dash sighed. “I just felt a kick, that’s all…”
Jorge simply sighed in relief over his wife’s response, and returned to his food.
“Wanna feel it?” Dash raised an eyebrow. “See if they’ll finally try to kick with you feeling around this time?”
Jorge simply stayed silent, looking at her with a curious look. However, he had no time to respond at all, as Dash grabbed his hoof, and gently placing it on her ten month pregnant belly.
Meanwhile, Cryo was still too focused on his food to care about anything.
Jorge sat still, letting his wife guide his hoof around her belly, hoping she could get another kick out.
Soon enough, he felt a bump on his hoof, as something tried to push his hoof off of her stomach.
“Felt it?” Dash queried, letting go of her husband’s hoof.
“Yeah…” Jorge nodded slowly. “Yeah I did…”
“It’s about time…” Dash snickered.
Jorge sniggered back. “It was clearly trying to get me to let go of your belly.”
“But at least it finally kicked for you…”
Jorge nodded. “Yeah…” He paused for a moment, remembering something. “By the way, did we ever finish our announcement back at the baby shower?”
“Nope.” Dash shook her head. “Nopony knows yet.”
“Mind if we keep it that way?” Jorge raised an eyebrow. “I want it to be a surprise for everypony.”
“Alright.” Dash nodded.
Jorge got another bite of his food, contemplating to himself. “I still can’t believe there’s just a month left…”
“You’re telling me…” Dash rubbed her belly gently. “It’s kinda scary how fast these months have flown…”
“Are you nervous?”
“Little bit.” Dash nodded. “But it’s kinda exciting, too…”
“Oh?” Jorge raised an eyebrow.
“Mhm.” Dash hummed. “Like, it’s exciting ‘cause… I’ll finally get to see the—”
*SLAM!*
“JORGE! IT’S TWILIGHT! SHE’S GOING INTO LABOR!”
Jorge and Dash immediately jerk their head towards the now open door, finding Shadow standing right by it.
The cuban immediately stood up from his seat. “THE FUCK ARE YOU DOING HERE, THEN!? SHOULDN’T YOU BE TAKING HER TO THE HOSPITAL!?”
“I CAN’T GO IN ALONE! I NEED HELP!”
“THE HELL AM I SUPPOSED TO DO!?”
“I DUNNO! I’M NERVOUS AS FUCK!”
Jorge sighed, looking back at his wife in a rush. “Alright…” He quickly thought of what to do. “Dash, al—”
“I already know what to do! Go take Twilight to the hospital already!”
Everypony had stood still, or sat in the waiting room chairs as they all kept moving their heads, watching Shadow pace back and forth in front the room they had rushed Twilight into.
More and more, they kept watching the grey pegasus endlessly walking back and forth, his head low as he looked at the ground.
Nopony had any clue what to say, leaving the entire waiting room in a strange, awkward silence. Not even Celestia and Luna, who had also arrived, had no clue what to say.
Jorge, who was sitting in one of the chairs, looked over to his wife, who had been sitting next to him. “I don’t care what any of the doctors say… I’m going into that hospital room with you when the day comes…” He whispered.
“They’ll throw you out…” Dash whispered back.
“I’ll throw them out!” Jorge retorted. “Wait, no… They’re the ones helping you go through the actual birth… Uh… I’ll unleash my cuban wrath on them.”
“Good luck with that.” Dash chuckled, leaning closer to Jorge as she rested her head on him. “Though, I’d really feel more comfortable having you with me during the whole thing…”
Jorge leaned his head down, kissing the top of her head. “Don’t worry, Dash. I’ll be there with you the entire time…”
Once Jorge had reassured his wife, he looked up to his canadian friend once more, only to find Pinkie pacing back and forth right next to him, her head lying low as well, however with a cheerful smile plastered on her face.
“Uh…” Jorge broke the silence, raising an eyebrow. “Pinkie?” He spoke. “What’re you doing?”
“I dunno!” Pinkie stopped her copycatting to look at the cuban. “I saw Shadie doing it, so I figured it’d be fun!”
“Pinkie, that’s not why he’s—”
“It’s kinda tiring, though…” Pinkie interrupted. “I don’t how how he hasn’t stopped to take a break, yet…”
Jorge blinked in confusion, quickly shaking his head. “I give up.”
“Should’ve just done that from the beginning.” Dash snickered.
Suddenly, nearby doors had burst open, causing everyone to jerk their heads towards the door as they were all completely caught off guard over who stepped through.
“Aight guys…” Ish smirked, wearing a doctor’s outfit. “I got this. I’m asian. That automatically makes me a doctor.”
Celestia raised an eyebrow. “Uh…”
Jorge narrowed his eyes. “No, it doesn’t.”
“But I’m asian…”
“No. It doesn’t.”
“But—”
“Ish. Go home.” Jorge pointed at the door behind Ish. “We’re all here worried about Twilight, we really don’t need you to be retarded right now…”
“I’m not being retarded though!” Ish crossed his arms.
“Ish.” Jorge deadpanned. “Go. Home.”
“You can’t make me.”
“Wanna bet on that?”
”JORGE! LET ME OUTTA HERE!”
Jorge rolled his eyes. “I warned him…”
”SERIOUSLY! JORGE! I DON’T LIKE BEING LOCKED UP IN THE SUPPLY CLOSET! THERE’S SO MUCH WEIRD SHIT IN HERE! OH GOD, IS THAT A TENTACLE?!”
Shadow looked up at the cuban, raising an eyebrow at the familiar sound of asian screaming. “Huh?”
“Don’t worry about it.” Jorge shook his head. “Just Ish being retarded, as usual.”
“Oh.”
Soon enough, the door to Twilight’s room opened, a nurse slowly poking her head through the gap. “Prince Shadow?”
“That’s me!” Shadow jerked his head to face the nurse. “What’s wrong!? Is my wife okay!?”
“Your wife’s fine.” The nurse nodded with a smile. “She’s just… Kinda… Uncooperative...”
“How so?”
“She’s refusing to do anything unless you’re there by her side.”
Shadow slowly entered the room, seeing all the doctors preparing Twilight for the big moment. While Twilight herself had laid uncomfortably on the bed, wincing in pain as she was struck with another contraction.
Twilight immediately looked over to him, her eyes completely bloodshot as she gave him the ultimate death stare.
“YOU DID THIS TO ME!” She shouted.
“NO. YOU DID THIS TO ME!” Shadow shouted back.
Twilight simply ignored his remark, reaching a hoof out as she tried to grab her husband’s hoof. Once Shadow had gotten close enough, he grabbed her hoof, holding it gently as she finally began to cooperate with the doctors.
“Alright, Twilight…” One of the doctors spoke gently. “I need you to just breathe.”
“I am breathing…” Twilight deadpanned.
“Not the normal breathing, Twily…”
The nurse quickly took the doctor’s place to assist. “Okay… I want you to take deep, long breaths…”
Luckily, Twilight had cooperated, breathing heavily enough to the point where it sounded like she was saying “hee hoo” over and over.
“As much as I don’t want to rush things…” One of the doctors spoke up. “But we’re gonna need you to push, Princess. Like, right now.”
“Don’t worry, Twi…” Shadow said softly. “I’m right he~EEEEEEERE!” He hissed in pain as Twilight began crushing his hoof the more she had pushed.
“You’re doing good! You’re doing good!”
“Can’t really say the same for my hoof!” Shadow winced in pain as his wife continued to viciously squeeze his hoof.
“Breathe! Breathe!”
Twilight began to scream in pain, the intensity of childbirth being too much for her to handle.
In a matter of seconds, Shadow looked over to his wife, realizing her horn had begun to glow quite brightly. Her purple magic aura becoming thicker and thicker to the point where he couldn’t even see her horn.
“Uh… Should we worry about… this?”
The nurse looked over to the two, shaking her head. “Erm… This sort of thing happens to quite a few unicorns. As long as she doesn’t start casting spells, we should be fine…”
“A-Alright…” Shadow nodded. “If you say so…”
“I can see a head!” One of the doctors shouted. “Keep pushing!”
Twilight’s screams began to intensify, piercing almost everyone’s ears as she continued to push, and her horn glowing even brighter.
Soon enough, Shadow felt the air begin to chill, as he felt wind suddenly blowing from above. He clenched his eyes shut, mentally preparing himself for the worst possible scenario.
After a deep breath, he looked up, knowing the doctors are currently too busy to worry about whatever spell Twilight’s casting. Instantly, he knew exactly what spell she was casting, due to having heard what it does, and what it looks like from Jorge.
It was a portal.
“Mmm… Man, cinnamon toast is the best…” Spoke a young man by the name of Dylan, normally known online as his username: Quigzerz.
“Cinnamon toast gets me thinking…” Dylan muttered to himself. “Where the hell did Jorge and them go? It’s been like, uh...three years? Wait, that doesn't sound right...ah fuck, forget it.”
He quickly reached over for his phone, opening the skype app only to find a message from a familiar face.
Trey: Sup bitch
Dylan looked at his phone, not even giving a single thought to his reply.
Quigzerz: Suck my dick, Troy
Trey: wow rude
Quigzerz: Eat me.
Trey: ew no
Dylan placed his phone back into sleep mode, smiling in content over his accomplishment.
...What did he accomplish?
He forgot.
Minutes later, he felt a yawn building up. He leaned his chair back, stretching his right arm while he continued to carry his toast with his left, finally yawning. His chair rolled back slightly, one of the wheels falling off what was supposed to be solid, flat floor, tipping the entire chair backwards.
Dylan looked back, quickly finding gravity shove him down through the floor. Knowing there was nothing he could do to stop it, and the sheer fact that he felt lazy right at that moment, he went with it.
In a matter of seconds, with a look that said ‘well, fuck’, Dylan had completely fallen through the floor.
While Shadow knew where the portal lead to, as it was once a place he called home. Though, the exact location of the portal was a mystery to him, as all he could see was the portal was inconveniently placed on someone’s floor.
He waited for a moment, wondering if anything would fall through before the Portal would inevitably close. Only for a wheel to slowly fall into the portal, tipping over an entire chair backwards. Shadow’s eyes immediately shot wide open, fearing that another human would be stuck in Equestria with them.
Instantly, he heard a familiar voice. “OHHHHH SHIIII—”
*CRASH!*
Shadow remained frozen in place, shocked by the fact there was not only another human.
But a human he recognized.
Just as inconveniently, he looked up once more, finding the portal to quickly close in just a matter of seconds, as well as his wife’s horn dimming from it’s otherwise bright glow.
Shadow jerked his head back to the human, who seemed not to care about what had just happened to him, as he continued to eat his toast.
“Welp.” Dylan randomly spoke, taking a bite from his toast. “I’m here now, wherever that is... I’ve probably been abducted for all I know...”
“D-Dylan!?” Shadow gawked in shock, completely forgetting about the miracle of childbirth happening right next to him.
Dylan raised an eyebrow. “Great, my abductees know my name…” he lamented “Wait, the fuck is that voice…” He slowly tried to get up from his seat. “Did one of my friends abduct me… again?” Quickly looking to the source of the voice, he found a small pony.
“Oh…” Dylan muttered. “Well, hello little guy…” He cooed, reaching a hand to pet the little pony. “Did you happen to see the person who spoke just a second ago?”
Shadow narrowed his eyes, slapping Dylan’s hand away from him. “I am the person who just spoke a second ago…”
“Well, shit…” Dylan’s eyes widened. “Why couldn’t it have been space dolphins…”
Shadow deadpanned. “I’m a talking horse, and you’re worried about that?”
“...No, I’m not worried, just mildly concerned.” Dylan shrugged.
“Seriously?” Shadow raised an eyebrow. “You’re not gonna even question the voice like you did just a second ago?”
“I did?” Dylan raised an eyebrow. “Oh yeah… I did…”
“I’d hate to interrupt your little moment…” The nurse interrupted. “But we’re all still focusing on your wife, remember?”
Shadow blinked, having completely forgotten about the crushing pain of his wife holding on to his hoof. “Riiiiight.”
“Wait…” Dylan narrowed his eyes. “Do I know you?”
“Seriously?” Shadow deadpanned. “How do you not recognize me yet!?”
“Why would I recognize a grey horse?”
“Because I was someone you used to talk to almost every day…?”
“Jorge!?”
“God dammit…” Shadow facehoofed.
“ISHTABA!?”
“DO I SOUND LIKE ISHTABA TO YOU!?”
Instantly, a light bulb lit up in Dylan’s head as he finally figured out the answer.
“Wait… Br—Oof!” Dylan was quickly interrupted by Shadow’s wing slapping him straight across the face.
“No. I gave up that old name a long time ago.”
“Fuck does that mean?” Dylan rubbed his now sore face.
“Prince Shadow…” The nurse groaned. “While I’m fully aware that this little… meeting, was all due to your wife’s magical surge, I suggest you escort your… ‘friend’ out of here.”
Dylan continued not to care about the childbirth going on right next to him. “Prince Shadow?” He raised an eyebrow. “What kind of gay ass name is that?”
Shadow simply narrowed his eyes, groaning. “Dylan. Out.” He pointed over to the exit of the room. “You can sort this out with Jorge outside.”
“Fine.” Dylan waving a hand dismissively, getting up from the floor, and walking towards the door, with his toast still in hand. “But ‘Shadow’ is still a dumbass name in my book.”
“Get outta here, already!”
The waiting room was filled with random chatter over what they assumed could be happening in Twilight’s room. As they all saw a very bright glow rushing through the cracks of the door.
“It was more than likely just one of the doctors doing something…” Jorge added his two cents. “I know I saw a unicorn doctor walk in there earlier…”
“But the glow was purple.” Celestia countered. “It clearly came from Twilight.”
“What would Twilight be doing with her magic if she’s still going through foalbirth?” Jorge raised an eyebrow. “It doesn’t make sense, to be honest.”
“Well, darling, I did read up on a book once that about fifty-five percent of unicorns have random magic surges during foalbirth.” Rarity added. “It wouldn’t be a surprise if Twilight was part of that fifty-five percent.”
“Hm.” Jorge placed a hoof on his chin. “I suppose. I wouldn’t know, cause I’ve never read up on foalbirth yet…”
“I have.” Dash added. “Rarity’s right on that, actually.”
“So it was just a magical surge, then?” Applejack inquired.
“Well, according to the book, from the fifty-five percent, fifty percent have had harmless surges in which the room just glows.” Dash shrugged. “The other fifty percent…”
Interrupting the entire conversation, Twilight’s room door opened, everyone jerking their heads as they froze in place, seeing a human walk right through.
“It’s a boy!” Pinkie cheered.
“...cast random spells…” Dash finished her sentence, half-feeling it was pointless to do so.
Jorge immediately got out of his head, recognizing the human. He slowly walked closer to the human, cocking his head to the side.
“It couldn’t be…” He muttered, mentally scanning the human’s face once more. Despite recognizing the human, he shook his head. “No… It couldn’t be…”
“Still had hopes for those space dolphins...” Dylan randomly spoke up, casually eating some more of his toast.
Jorge blinked. “But… It is…”
“Something tells me you know who this human is, beast?” Celestia tilted her head askew.
“There’s only one way to make sure it’s who I think it is…”
Dylan simply raised an eyebrow at the red horse’s strange behavior, eyeing him as he walked over to a nearby door labeled “Supply Closet”.
Upon opening the door, he heard screaming from a familiar voice.
“FREEDOM!” Ish shouted, ignoring the strange expression on the cuban’s face. Jorge immediately grabbed his shirt by the chest, pulling him out of the room. He quickly faced the asian towards the newcomer.
“Look familiar?” He raised an eyebrow.
Despite being on his knees as the blue pegasus held his shirt, Ish narrowed his eyes, scanning the new human, trying to recall if he knew him or not.
In a matter of seconds, a light bulb lit up in his head. “HOLY SHIT.” He shouted, pointing at the human. “IT’S FUCKING DYLAN!”
“Ermahgerrrrrd!” Dylan mocked, casually raising an eyebrow. “It’s an ershterber!”
Jorge simply deadpanned. “I’m surrounded by idiots…” He let go of Ish’s shirt, causing Ish to lose his balance entirely, and falling down from his knees.
Meanwhile, Jorge rolled his eyes, pretending the two humans weren’t there at all, and returning to his wife.
“So, Ish…” Dylan remarked, crossing his arms. “You’ve been abducted by the rainbow horses, too…”
“Abducted?” Ish raised an eyebrow. “Yo, chill fam. We haven’t been abducted…”
“Are you sure?” Dylan raised an eyebrow back. “Maybe they just brainwashed you into thinking you haven’t been abducted…”
Ish blinked. “Actually, now that you mention i—OW!” His sentence was rudely interrupted by a rather large book that had been thrown his way. He jerked his head to where he assumed the book had come from, finding Jorge staring daggers at him.
“Even if you were brainwashed, which you aren’t.” He rolled his eyes. “The only one who could’ve done it would’ve been you and your own stupidity.”
“That’s offensive, but what about that spell Twilight used to turn me into a horse for a day?”
“Did you feel brainwashed when that happened?”
“Maybe…”
“Did you want to stay as a horse?”
“No…”
“Did we turn you back to a human when you asked?”
“Did you?” Ish raised an eyebrow, pausing for a moment as he checked his arms. “Wait, yes you did.”
“Then shut the hell up.” Jorge deadpanned, getting off of his seat to walk over to Dylan. He stood up on his two rear legs, bopping the other human’s forehead. “And you.”
Dylan blinked. “Yes, senpai?”
Jorge kept a straight face. “Do you seriously not recognize my voice whatsoever?”
“No. Maybe… probably. Several bells, actually...”
“I go missing for two years, and you forget a friend you used to talk to almost every day for four years?”
“I forget how my step-dad sounds if I haven't seen him in over a week...” Dylan casually explained.
Jorge took a deep breath, and sighed. “It really has been a while, hasn’t it, Dyl-weed?”
Dylan’s eyes widened. “I will wreck your shit, you cuban bitch.”
“Oh yeah?” Jorge raised an eyebrow. “I’m not sure if you noticed, but I’m a pony no—”
“Horse, Jorge.” Ish interrupted. “Horse.”
“Do you wanna go back into the supply closet?”
“PONY. JORGE. YOU’RE A PONY.”
Dylan paused for a moment, eyeing the stallion in front of him, realizing his claim was actually true.
“Oh shit.” Dylan blinked. “Jorge, you’re a rainbow horse, too! Since when is this a thing?”
Jorge narrowed his eyes. “Ever since the rainbow horses abducted me.”
“Really now?”
“Dylan, that was sarcasm.”
“So is this.”
Jorge blinked, having been completely confused and caught off guard. “Alright then…”
Interrupting the scene, Pinkie poked her head from behind Jorge, whom was still somehow standing on his rear legs.
Dylan raised an eyebrow at the mare. “Um… Hello?”
Jorge blinked, noticing Dylan’s attention being drawn to something behind him. He turned his head slightly, seeing the pink mare by the corner of his eye. He chuckled softly. “Pinkie? This is an old friend of mine, Dylan.” He looked back at the human. “Dylan? This is Pinkie.”
Dylan paused for a moment, unsure whether to reach his hand out for a friendly handshake, or to just shrug off her existence entirely.
Not wanting to be retardedly rude, he reached out his hand. “‘Sup?”
Pinkie gasped over-dramatically, pushing the stallion in front of her out of the way as she grabbed Dylan’s hand, shaking it wildly. “Hi! I’m Pinkie! I wasn’t expecting another human to show up in our world after the whole ‘Shadie and Ish’ thing that happened a year ago! I’m really excited to meet you—”
Meanwhile, Jorge simply got back up onto his four legs, walking away from the pink mare and her constant babbling.
The nurse slowly poked her head into the waiting room, her eyes clenched shut as she had feared for the worst possible scenario with the new... addition... to the guests.
She had half-expected somepony to scream, or say something, but to her surprise, the room seemed to be quiet. She slowly opened an eye, still expecting something to happen, only to find nothing in front of the door. She sighed a breath of relief, opening the door fully as she began to step out of the room.
Once she had finally gotten a look at all the guests again, she noticed there were two humans missing. Being curious about their sudden disappearance, she raised an eyebrow.
“Uh… Where did—”
“Ish and Dylan go?” Jorge interrupted, scoffing softly. “Don’t worry too much about them. I took care of them for now.”
“Erm…” The nurse wanted to ask what the cuban had meant by “took care” of them, but decided against it. She shook her head, bringing herself back to her original task. “Well. Everything went well, if anypony’s wondering. It was a smooth process, minus the whole… Yeah…”
Pinkie immediately jumped from her seat. “Does this mean we get to see the foal now!?”
The nurse nodded. “Yes, at the moment, Twilight and Shadow are greeting their foals for the first time.”
Dash blinked. “Did I hear that right? Did you just say foals? As in… more than one?”
Having previously being preoccupied by something else, Jorge’s head immediately jumped to face the nurse. “The who did what now?”
The nurse paused for a moment. “Right… Princess Twilight ended up having twins.”
Pinkie’s eyes widened to an impossible size. “Twins!?”
Meanwhile, Jorge nudged his wife gently, gaining her attention so he could whisper into her ear.
“Remind me never to let Pinkie foalsit for us.”
At first, Dash was reluctant to agree with Jorge’s decision, but then she looked over to the earth pony, who was already trying to burst her way into the patient’s room, with the nurse preventing her from doing so by pulling her back by her tail. Dash then looked back at her husband and whispered.
“Agreed.”
Jorge looked over to the nurse, who was struggling to hold Pinkie in place.
“Ma’am! You have to let me finish!” The nurse shouted.
“B-BUT THE FOALS!” Pinkie shouted back. “THEY NEED TO MEET THEIR AUNTIE PINKIE!”
“Pinkie.” Dash deadpanned.
The energetic mare stopped, turning her head back at the prismatic maned pegasus. “Yes?”
“Calm down.”
“B-but—”
Jorge cut in. “If I pull one of the retards from the supply closet, will you calm down?”
“What good will that do?”
“You can do whatever you want with whichever one I pull from there.”
Jorge watched as Pinkie narrowed her eyes, slowly gaining the feeling as if he was being scanned.
Then, seconds later. She nodded. “Deal.”
Jorge nodded as he got up from his seat. He walked over to the supply closet, opening the door.
”FREEDOM!”
Jorge blindly reached for one of the humans, until he grabbed someone’s arm and pulled them out of the closet.
”FUCK! JORGE! YOU PULLED THE WRONG FAG—”
Jorge closed the door to the supply closet once more. He looked over to the human he pulled out, chuckling. “Well, Dylan. Looks like your luck has failed you once again.”
“Oh. I’m out of the closet… Does this mean I’m gay now?”
Jorge deadpanned, looking over to Pinkie. “Here you go. One random human, freshly pulled from the supply clos—”
Before he could finish his sentence, he slowly realized that Pinkie was nowhere in sight. Raising an eyebrow, he looked over to Dylan, who was now also nowhere in sight.
Jorge simply stood there, letting this moment sink into his head.
The nurse blinked. “Uhm… I’m just gonna go back in there… For those of you who want to visit, we can only allow two visitors at a time.”
Jorge and Dash immediately raised a hoof. “I’ll go first.” They both said in unison.
The nurse looked at the both of them, then slowly started walking back into Twilight’s room. “Right this way…”
The nurse entered the room, making sure everything was alright before letting the guests in. Sure enough, everything was fine. Twilight and her husband were still handling the foals, so it seemed safe enough to allow the first set of visitors in. Just to be on the safe side, however, she decided to ask.
“I have two visitors who seem to be pretty anxious to see you all…” The nurse explained. “Is it fine if I let them in?”
Shadow lifted his head up to view the nurse. “Is one of them a rainbow maned mare, and the other a red stallion?”
The nurse nodded.
“Yeah. Let them in.”
With that, the nurse opened the door further, allowing the two pegasi entrance.
Jorge was the first one to walk through the door, with his wife not far behind.
The first thing he saw was Twilight, her mane heavily disheveled, cradling both of her foals in her hooves, smiling like a little filly.
“Hey, guys…” He muttered. “Hope I’m not intruding…”
Shadow shook his head. “Not at all.” He looked down at his foals. “You’re just in time to greet the new additions to the family.”
The cuban slowly walked up to the bed, attempting to get a better look at them. While they were wrapped in blankets, and sleeping peacefully in their mother’s embrace, he was able to get a good view of them.
One of them was a colt, the other a filly. Both of them having one feature from their parents or the other, namely, the colt being a unicorn, while the filly was a pegasus.
The colt’s coat was a very deep purple, but very light in complexion, his mane looked similar to his father’s, however it only had two dark shades of purple, and a very dark orange stripe. The tail was the same in color, though it was as short as Jorge’s tail, but less spiky and more smoothed out.
Looking over to the filly, her coat was a tannish green, while her mane looked like a more rounded version of Twilight’s, being a somewhat pink-ish orange, as well as borrowing her purple shaded stripes, only with lighter shades compared to her mother’s. Her tail matched this color scheme, and also appeared to be a smoother version of her mom’s.
https://camo.derpicdn.net/0ed2695c5d0c20ead63e0fb2f6763c49cc5c6ffc?url=https%3A%2F%2Flh5.googleusercontent.com%2FZY3Me_bqo_MweyOUpn_dDcKfsh7pL1nzYWgRRSySIgHS2vFDbVpHGzjmfwXcZss2JSoQUZ4Zn-CqCflMP_fIbq376qzJeMhpJD4KGVlmTggzBWzF6V0589LBTZahvHjmkA
Having seen enough, Jorge grabbed a nearby chair, sitting next to the proud father. “So, twins, eh?”
“Yeah I’m surprised too.” Shadow shrugged, “We didn’t find out what we were having.”
“I heard about that. You guys wanted to keep it a surprise?”
“Yeah.” Shadow nodded. “It was Twilight’s idea. She wanted to be surprised to see what we’d get, instead of knowing ahead of time.”
“That’s a first.” Jorge snickered.
“I know, right?” Shadow raised an eyebrow.
Jorge shrugged. “Dash didn’t feel the same way about that.”
“You mean you both already know what she’s carrying?”
“Yeah.”
“And you haven’t told anyone?”
“See, here’s the ironic part. Dash wanted to know, and we originally were gonna announce it to everyone back at the baby shower.” Jorge began to explain. “But then we ultimately decided not to.”
“So you two wanted to make it a surprise for everyone else?”
“Uhm…” Jorge paused. “Pretty much.”
“Ohmigosh they’re so adorable!” Dash squealed. “I just wanna pinch their tiny little cheeks!”
“Do us a favor, and don’t.” Shadow cut in. “We’re probably gonna have more than enough of that from Pinkie.”
“No you won’t.” Jorge chuckled. “She’s currently preoccupied with something else.”
“Pinkie? Preoccupied with something other than the foals?” Shadow’s eyes went wide. “Jorge, what did you break?”
Jorge scoffed. “Me? Break something to get Pinkie’s attention? Please… If only it were that easy.”
“So then what did you do?”
“I gave her Dylan.”
“Yeah, that would do it.” Shadow nodded. “Good job.”
“So, what’re you guys gonna call ‘em?” Dash looked up to Twilight and Shadow, whom simply looked at each other with a smile. They nodded simultaneously, almost as if they were cueing each other for something. Then, they looked back at the mare.
“Midnight Star…” Shadow called out the colt’s name.
“And Emerald Dawn.” Twilight cooed, looking down at her foals once more.
Right then, almost as if they already understood their names, the foals slowly opened their eyes, looking over to their mother and father again, finding two new ponies in the room.
Instead of recoiling in fear, their eyes glowed in excitement, Midnight going as far as squealing softly at Rainbow Dash.
“Hey! What'd I do?” Dash blinked.
“Doesn't look like you're scaring them, that's for sure.” Jorge commented.
Having realized something, Shadow spoke to the cuban, breaking his concentration on the foals. “On a more serious note… What're we gonna do with Dylan?”
Jorge scratched the back of his neck. “He could bunk with you guys for a bit? I mean, your castle’s huge, and all…”
“That's a terrible idea.” Shadow shook his head. “Don't you have a guest room?”
“Well, uh, yeah. But Cryo’s spending the weekend at our place, and he's been sleeping there, so…”
“Well, I guess we could find him a room somewhere in the castle, we'd just need to soundproof the room.”
“What makes you say that?”
“Just in case he tries to be loud for a stupid reason or something. I'm not taking any chances with him walking up the foals when they're asleep.”
“This is Dylan we're talking about, though. It's not like he's another ishtaba or anything.” Jorge shrugged.
“True. But he still has his moments.” Shadow pointed out.
“I guess…” Jorge nodded. “Wanna borrow my bat in case of anything?”
“Jorge, I'm married to someone who can cast magic. There are far worse things we can do other than whacking him with a metal bat…”
Jorge shrugged in response, looking over to his wife as she continued to coo adorably over the foals.
“Now it’s your turn, Dash…”
Author's Note
Art of the foals was done by a friend who I'm pretty sure doesn't have a fimfic account.
...One chapter left to go.

//-------------------------------------------------------//
   Chapter 3-12: "Welcome to the world, little ones..."    
//-------------------------------------------------------//
Chapter 3-12: "Welcome to the world, little ones..."
“It’s kinda scary…” Dash sighed, walking with her husband on their way to Twilight’s castle. “Any day now, I could wind up in the hospital. I’m due any day now!”
Jorge shrugged. “You’re worrying too much about it.”
“You’re not worrying enough.” Dash grumbled.
“Oh, I’m worrying enough.” Jorge shook his head. “I’m worrying about your health, I’m worrying about the foal’s health. I’m worrying about how this whole thing will end, shall I go on?”
“Yeah yeah…” Dash made a shooing gesture with a hoof. “I get it…”
Jorge rolled his eyes. “You’re just paranoid.”
“Yeah, well... You’re just cuban.”
“I know I am.” Jorge chuckled. “That’s a well known fact.”
Dash growled softly, mumbling to herself softly. ”Curse you and your laidback attitude.”
“What was that?”
“What?” Dash blinked, pretending she hadn’t said anything.
Jorge simply snickered at his wife’s attitude. “Love you too, babe.” He then reached a hoof at the door that was now in front of them. However, as he was still looking over to his wife, he was reaching blindly, and instead of knocking on the door…
...He knocked on Shadow’s face, where the door was supposed to be.
“Jorge, kindly stop knocking on my face before I break your hoof...again.”
Jorge blinked, pausing all motion in his hoof, slowly turning his head towards the canadian. “Have you just been standing there, waiting for us to walk up to the door?”
“...Uh… No...” Shadow shook his head. “I saw you two walking over here, so I came to greet you guys in. Until you knocked on my face…”
“In my defence, I’m used to not having someone already wait at the door.” Jorge retorted.
“Sure…” Shadow nodded slowly. “Whatever. I’m not gonna make a big deal out of it. Just watch what you’re doing next time…”
And with that, Shadow simply walked back into the castle, with Jorge and Dash following suit.
While Twilight accompanied Dash to the nursery, Jorge and Shadow made their way over to Dylan’s room. Shadow grabbed the doorknob, twisting it gently as he began to push the door.
“I’M INNOCENT! I BLAME THE COUCH!”
“Relax, Dolan.” Shadow chuckled. “It’s just me and the cuban.”
Dylan slowly peeked over the side of the bed as he spoke. “Are you armed?”
“Why would we be armed?” Jorge raised an eyebrow. “It’s just a cuban and a cana—Yeah I can see why you’re asking that…”
“Well then... Weeeelcome to ‘Casa De Quigz’! Over here is the closet where I spend my time cowering in fear! Patent Pending!” Dylan opened his arms wide, doing his best Billy Mays impression, smiling wildly during the whole process.
“Should I be offended that Dylan just tried to speak Spanish?” Jorge thought aloud.
“That was Spanish? Like... ‘sink the mayo’, Spanish?”
“Yes. Yes you should.” Shadow nodded in response.
“I know what Spanish is, it’s just fun to see his offence rather than just hearing it like I normally do.” Dylan explained, shrugging.
Jorge narrowed his eyes, trying to ignore Dylan’s statement. “Alright, well. Shadow and I have been talking…”
“...And we’ve come to a decision.” Shadow finished the sentence.
“Is this about the couch? THE PINK ONE MADE ME DO IT, I SWEAR!” Dylan immediately began to panic, quickly diving under his bed to hide.
“No, Dylan. It’s not about the cou—Wait, what’d he do to your couch?” Jorge blinked, looking over to the canadian.
“I dunno, this is my first time hearing about it!” Shadow responded. “Dylan, what did you do to the couch!?”
“Uhh, let’s just say I wouldn’t call it a couch and more of a confetti deathtrap...”
“Alright, y’know what? Forget the couch.” Jorge pushed the thought away. “That’s not important right now.”
“Confetti deathtrap!?”
“Shadow, not important right now.”
“Not important!? He just said my couch is a confetti deathtrap!”
“That’s not what we’re here for!” Jorge reminded the canadian, focusing his attention back to Dylan. “Look, Dylan. You’ve been here for a month, now. Celestia has kept your whole ‘arrival’ thing on the down-low during all that time. Ponies are getting curious, and apparently there’s news reporters asking who else is living in the castle. Because somehow it’s blatantly obvious.”
“I blame the Pink One, I hardly leave this room.” Dylan retorted.
“Regardless if you’ve been leaving the room or not, I personally am not prepared for news reporters freaking out over a fourth human in Equestria.” Jorge explained. “That’ll just leave them questioning the first three, and if more will show up.”
”But my couch…”
“Well, I hope this doesn’t cause an uproar. My visit wasn’t terribly intentional.”
“Yeah, well. I blame Twilight on that one.” Jorge shrugged. “It’s her spell that brought you here in the first place.”
“So what do?” Dylan slowly peeked his head from under the bed, before escaping from his safe haven.
Jorge looked over to Shadow, who seemed to have gotten over the couch somewhat. The canadian looked back over Jorge, eyebrow raised, until he got the hint.
“Oh!” Shadow looked back at the now standing Dylan. “Alright, so, Twilight has a spell tha—”
“That will send me home?” Dylan cut in. “Or at least away from you fuck buckets?” He added.
“No.” Jorge shook his head. “A spell that will turn you into—”
“A space dolphin?!”
“Into a pony.” Shadow and Jorge said in unison, completely ignoring Dylan’s interruption.
Jorge rolled his eyes. “It’s the only way we can prevent a national crisis against all of us.”
“The press is already having a field day with the fact that Jorge and I have foals, according to Celestia. And Jorge’s aren’t even born yet.” Shadow added.
“Do I at least get the option for consent?” Dylan asked, adjusting his glasses.
“That’s why we’re here.” Jorge nodded. “Twilight is more than ready to cast the spell. The question of the day is if you’re up for it or not.”
“Welp, it seems the phrase of the day is ‘sure, why not’, so leggo.”
Jorge and Shadow look at each other, nodding simultaneously as they got our answer.
Shadow looked back at Dylan. “I’ll get started on preparations, as well as telling Twilig—”
Suddenly, Shadow was interrupted by what sounded like a muffled explosion, followed by a soft thud against something.
“What was that?” Jorge’s eyes widened.
“That would be… the deathtrap.” Dylan blatantly replied.
Then, the three hear what sounded like a party blower. Jorge and Shadow looked out the door to find confetti sprawled out in parts of the hallway.
“And that would be the confetti…”
Shadow began walking out of the room. “Aw, geez…” He began running out to where the confetti originated. “Twilight?! You alright!?”
“Hm.” Jorge placed a thinking hoof on his chin. “...Maybe it was important, after all…” He began walking out the door.
“Jorge!”
The cuban paused in his tracks, turning around to face the new human. “Yes?”
“If I had said no, what were you guys gonna do?”
“Oh. We would’ve had to go to Plan B.” Jorge nonchalantly explained, continuing his walk back to see what happened with the ‘confetti deathtrap’.
“Oh…” Dylan nodded, seeming to understand, until a thought passed through his head. “Wait… what was ‘Plan B’?”
“Alright… How big was the damage?” Jorge walked into the room, finding an ocean of confetti throughout the room, a couch now broken into pieces, an angry Twilight, a surprised Shadow, and a curious Rainbow Dash, investigating the couch.
“This looks like way too much confetti to be able to fit inside this couch…” Dash poked the couch, causing some confetti to leak out from inside the ripped cushions.
Jorge simply stood still, gawking in amazement over the scene in front of him.
His attention was caught on the scene so much, that he barely even noticed Dylan walking up to see the destruction, too.
“Hm… There seems to be a lot more confetti than I remember…” Dylan thought out loud.
Jorge simply took a deep breath, and sighed. “Laidback, Jorge… laidback…” He mumbled to himself, mentally preparing himself to become a part of the scene.
Twilight immediately noticed the red stallion walk into the room, focusing all of her attention to him.
“You. You did this, didn’t you!?”
Jorge simply nodded. “Yes. I snuck into your house, I meticulously replaced all the cotton inside of the couch with confetti, and rigged it to explode when someone would try to sit on it. In fact, Shadow was my accomplice.”
“I knew i—”
“I was being sarcastic, Twilight…” Jorge rolled his eyes. “Why would I go through so much trouble when I’m already stressing enough over Dash being due any minute?”
“I dunno, because you’re cuban!?”
“I feel like everyone has been stealing this joke from Shadow too many times…” Jorge narrowed his eyes. “I did not rig the couch to blow up upon being sat on just to flood the room with confetti. My ‘jokes’ are more verbal. In fact, Ish calls them ‘shitposts’.”
Twilight rolled her eyes. “It had to be somepony.”
“Alright, let’s think about it like this…” Jorge took a deep breath. “Who else has this much confetti?”
“...Of course…”
“As for rigging the ‘explosion’, I don’t think that’s something she could’ve done alone.” Jorge shrugged. “I’m gonna go out on a limb and blame Dylan. Even then, the core ‘prank’ had to have been set up by Pinkie. So if anything, she’s more at fault for this than Dylan is.”
“See? I told you I didn’t do anything!” Shadow added in. “You’d think after being together for two years, you’d know me enough by now!”
“That’s the thing, I do know you enough by now. You would gladly team up with Pinkie just to pull a prank on me.”
“...Alright, you got me there.” Shadow nodded. “But I’d never do something this large scaled!”
“I’m usually the one who goes all out on pranks!” Dash chimed in. “...I’m actually kinda proud of her on this one.”
Jorge simply rolled his eyes, looking over to Dylan, who was still standing in the hallway as he watched the scene unfold. He then looked back to Twilight as a thought passed through his head. “Besides, why are you freaking out so much? You have magic to clean this mess up. And as for the couch, you could probably just buy a new one using the National Bank of friggin’ Celestia.”
“Doesn’t make it any less annoying to have to deal with, though…” Twilight rolled her eyes, as her horn began to glow brightly, her aura covering all the confetti, and with a bright flash, the confetti was gone.
“Don’t be such a cry baby, Twilight.” Jorge chuckled. “You already have two of them in the castle, we don’t want a third one.”
Shadow paused for a moment, thinking about the cuban’s remark, only to catch its double meaning. “Hey! I’m not a cry baby!”
Jorge raised an eyebrow. “No? Cause it sounds like you’re crying right about now.” He chuckled. “But in all seriousness, there’s no real reason to make this such a big deal, just get a new couch, yell at Pinkie, and done.”
The cuban began walking closer to the center of room, so he could face away from everyone. “But if she tries to do something that stupid to me. There will be a war. And one of us might not make it out of it alive…”
Suddenly, they heard hoofsteps running away, as if whoever caused them was actually afraid of Jorge’s threat.
The red pegasus then turned to face everyone once again. “Now, let’s get onto business. Dylan agreed on our proposal, and we’re gonna need to prep him for the spell.”
Shadow and Twilight looked at each other, eyebrows raised, then back at Jorge.
“Uh, how did you know she was here?” Shadow asked.
“I’ve been with her best friend for three years.” Jorge deadpanned. “You don’t think I wouldn’t have picked up on a few of these things by now?”
Dash simply snickered.
“Now, onto the whole ‘Dylan’ issue…” Jorge walked over to the human, who was still standing in the hallway.
“Um… Right.” Twilight nodded. “I’ll… uh… get started on relearning the spell…”
Jorge nodded, pushing the human towards the canadian. “Don’t worry, Dylweed. Shadow will get you all prepared for the spell.”
“Wait, am I supposed to strip down naked and lie on the floor like an idiot or something?’
“No. It’s just to mentally prepare you to turn you into a pony.”
“I’m mentally prepared for everything.”
Shadow deadpanned. “No you’re no—”
“Shhhh…” Dylan interrupted, placing a finger in front of the canadian’s lips. “Don’t question it, it relies on being prepared for nothing.”
Shadow scoffed. “Whatever, let’s just go…”
Jorge and Dash simply watched as the two made their way to another room, away from their field of view.
Smirking, he looked over to his wife. “Well, Dash, I guess that just leaves you and me, huh?”
“Mhm.” Dash nodded, walking up to him. “Just you, me, and this stupidly huge belly of mine.”
“Oh yeah?” Jorge raised an eyebrow. “I don’t think you look that bad with a pregnant belly…”
“You’re just saying that…” Dash rolled her eyes. “Look at me, I look fat. I can’t even fly like I normally do without worrying…”
Jorge softly planted a kiss on her lips. “Even so, you still look gorgeous to me.”
“You’re such a sap…” Dash smiled softly.
“Yeah, but you love this sap.” Jorge smiled back, leaning in for another kiss.
At first, she seemed to melt into his display of affection, returning with her own display as she pushed forward and closed her eyes as they continued kissing each other. But then, she quickly went stiff, and gasped. Jorge noticed her sudden reaction, and looked at her, then looked down, noticing a small puddle forming on the floor, trickling from her legs.
“J-Jorge…?”
The cuban’s attention quickly shifted from the puddle, to his wife, whose eyes were widened exponentially, as well as her pupils having shrunk to the size of marbles.
“It’s h-happening…”
Jorge’s eyes widened, he turned his head away from his wife, and shouted as loud as he could.
“SHADOOOOOW!”
”WHAAAAT!?”
“THE TIME HAS COME!”
In an instant, Shadow flew out of the room where Dylan and Twilight were, and appeared right in front of him. “Plan A or Plan B?!”
“Plan A! Go!”
“One wheelchair, coming right up!”
As Shadow sat in the waiting room alone, waiting for everypony else to arrive, he could only imagine how his cuban friend felt now being in the position he was around a month ago.
Knowing how much more calm Dash’s pregnancy was compared to Twilight’s the only thing he wondered is how the pegasus mare herself was holding up.
Then, suddenly, the entrance to the waiting room doors bursted wide open. Shadow jerked his head to see who was the one barging in.
“CORN! GET YOUR FRESH CORN, HERE! FRESH CORN!”
Soon, Shadow was able to see the person barging their way through was none other than Ish, doing whatever it was that Ishtabas do at a time like this.
“WE GOT GRILLED CORN, BAKED CORN, CREAMED CORN, CORN FLOUR, CORN CORN!” Ishtaba listed. “ALL FOR THE LOW LOW PRICE OF 69 BITS! ONLY AVAILABLE AT CORNHUB!”
Shadow narrowed his eyes, looking at the asian until he quickly noticed a wagon right behind him, carrying an obscene amount of corn. He also noticed a sign placed on both sides of the wagon, the top half of the signs containing the words “THE INTERNET” written in huge, bold letters. Right under it, is what appeared to be a website address. Which, upon closer look, read out as “cornhub.com”.
The canadian stallion looked up at the asian, unamused. “Seriously?”
“Oh. You’re the only one here…” Ishtaba thought aloud. “See, I was expecting everypony to just be here by now.”
“Nope. Just me.” Shadow shook his head. “We just got here like a good… uh… I wanna say five minutes ago.”
“Oh.” Ish uttered. “See, I was just told the news like a minute ago.”
Shadow blinked. “So what you’re telling me is that you’ve been dragging around that wagon with you even before you heard the news?”
“Exactly!”
Shadow’s hoof met his face once more, as its owner simply shook his head with his hoof covering his face.
“I’m surprised Jorge isn’t here yet…” Ish shrugged. “You’d think he’d be here in time for his wife giving birth…”
“He’s already in the hospital room with her, Ish.” Shadow rolled his eyes. “He refused to stay in the waiting room, and demanded he was in there with her.”
“So what you’re saying he’s not around to shove me back in the supply closet again?”
“Who said anything about not shoving you in the supply closet again?”
“Fuck.” Ish cursed to himself, regretting he had said anything about the closet in the first place.
The asian looked back at his massive pile of corn, noticing the contents of his wagon beginning to stir and shake, quickly worrying him.
“Uh… Shadow?” Ish raised an eyebrow. “Corn’s not supposed to move on its own in Equestria, right?”
“Why would you ask a dumb question like that?”
“Because there’s something inside my wagon, and it’s not just corn…”
Shadow got up from his seat, groaning softly. He walked over to the wagon, noticing Ish wasn’t lying, as the corn now began to shake more viciously, almost as if something was about to pop out.
Both of their eyes went wide, their state of panic causing them to duck on the ground and cover their heads, the both of them saying “DUCK!” at the same time as they did so.
The corn continued to shake more and more, until finally, something popped out of the massive pile, causing corn to spill all over the room.
“SURPRIIIIIIIISE!”
Shadow’s state of panic immediately vanished, as he quickly looked up, finding Pinkie Pie half-buried in Ish’s corn-wagon.
Ish, however, continued hiding on the ground, shouting wildly.
“DON’T EAT ME! I’M TOO YOUNG TO DIE! TAKE THE CANADIAN INSTEAD!”
“Ish...nothing’s gonna eat you...It’s just Pinkie.”
Ish lifted his head up from the ground, looking up at the wagon, confirming Shadow’s statement. “Oh…” He paused for a moment, before pushing Shadow closer to the wagon. “TAKE THE CANADIAN INSTEAD!”
Shadow deadpanned, disappointed in Ish’s actions.
“I heard Dashie was in labor, so I came using the fastest method I could think of; Ishie!” Pinkie explained.
“‘Course you did.” Shadow simply walked back over to his seat, sighing deeply as he awaited for any type of news on his friends.
After a good fifteen minutes had passed, everyone but Twilight and Dylan were already in the waiting room, minus Celestia and Luna, who were either too busy to show up, didn’t feel the need to show up, or didn’t hear about the news at all. No one was really sure.
Ish had tried to sell his corn to every single pony who walked into the waiting room, regardless if they were here for Rainbow Dash or not. After so many attempts to sell corn to everyone, Shadow became infuriated at the asian, leaving him with no choice but to do what Jorge did when Twilight was in labor.
He had stuffed him into the supply closet, along with dumping the entire contents of his wagon inside of the closet with him. For added measure, Shadow also placed the wagon in front of the door, and began to lay down on it.
It’s been a total of twenty minutes since Shadow and Jorge brought Dash in, and not once has a nurse, or Jorge himself, come out to say anything about her.
“Shouldn’t one of us go over to the front desk and see if somepony can tell us anything…?” Fluttershy spoke up. “It’s been awhile since we’ve been waiting here…”
“I already checked earlier when I went to use the restroom.” Shadow commented. “They’ll let us know what’s going on the second something major happens.”
Coincidentally, the door to Dash’s room opened up, as a nurse slowly walked out of the room, leaving the door open as she began to speak.
“Alright… Who all of you are here for Rainbow Dash?”
Everyone in the room raised their hoof.
The nurse simply nodded. “Alright. First off, I’d like to introduce myself. I am Nurse Redheart, and we’ve been doing the best we can to make things run smoothly.”
Shadow lifted his head from the wagon, eyebrow raised. “Buuuuut…”
“Oh! Prince Shadow!” Nurse Redheart gasped, ignoring the fact he was laying down in a wagon. “I read up on your wife’s pregnancy not too long ago, congratulations, by the way!”
Shadow blinked. “Uh… Thanks?”
Nurse Redheart nodded. “So, unlike Twilight’s whole… process, we’re having a bit of a hard time with Rainbow Dash… We’re just glad she’s not a unicorn...”
“Define ‘having a bit of a hard time’...”
“There’s a reason why I left the door open.” Redheart snickered, giving everyone the hint to listen carefully.
”Dash, it’s okay… I’m right here, alright?”
”Alright, one more time. This time, we need you to really push…”
”YOU DON’T THINK I HAVEN’T BEEN PUSHING?!”
”Not enough, it seems!”
”Alright. One, two, three. Push!”
Suddenly, they could hear the sounds of Rainbow Dash screaming in pain, as well as the softer sounds of Jorge’s growling, almost as if he was in pain too.
Nurse Redheart closed the door, leaving them to piece together what happens next.
“...Was it just me, or did I hear Jorge somewhere in those screams, too?” Applejack raised an eyebrow.
“You mean Rainbow Dash’s husband? Yeah. She’s been gripping his hoof during the whole thing.”
“Ah, so basically the same thing that happened to me.” Shadow chortled.
“Twilight gripped your hoof during the whole procedure, too?”
“Gripped it? She almost crushed my hoof!” Shadow chuckled. “When you go back in there with them, could ya tell Jorge that it’ll be worth it in the end for me?”
Nurse Redheart nodded. “Sure thing.” She looked back at the door, then back at everyone in the waiting room. “Speaking of which, I should probably head back in there. I just wanted to give you all a status update on what was going on.”
“Alright, thanks.” Shadow nodded.
After hearing his response, Redheart walked back into the room, focusing back on her job.
“Huh, different nurse.” Shadow thought aloud. “She seemed like she knew what she was doing more than the one who was helping with Twilight.” After a moment, he shrugged. “Eh, that’s a good thing, I suppose…”
Then, the waiting room entrance doors opened once more, allowing two more ponies to occupy more space.
“Sorry we’re late!” Twilight called out. “I was having a bit of a hard time trying to get the spell done correctly again...”
“You’re tellin me, I spent a few moments as a cactus here and there...” Dylan whined.
Shadow looked over to the familiar voice, curious of how he looked now as a pony.
To his surprise, his sight was greeted to a brownish-red unicorn, with a messy mint-chip mane, along with a scruffy tail of the same color, his eyes also seemed to be a brighter shade of green, along with glasses to go along with his new eyes. The more he looked at the new stallion, he began to notice his cutie mark, which was simply a piece of toast with a potion slapped on it.
https://camo.derpicdn.net/c8081ebf74fe7b4bde687c16fe341f82552982ce?url=https%3A%2F%2Flh5.googleusercontent.com%2FzcWDsA7X81hgGlSemoJp9YjQdcFO3znjcJmq5zPAbqOjkkWcCWChoZ4wDh9s5Jb1U8OhE7Ej_nKaI9v_7Bd2CId2aJ_tg1Wq8GqECvxwvpKEUIa9OoMbAcbTk0PO7BeYvA
“What, Dylan is a unicorn? Well, shit...” Shadow nodded slowly.
“I am?” Dylan blinked, looking up to the horn protruding out of his head. “Oh, shit, I am…”
Meanwhile, Shadow could notice Pinkie from the corner of his eye as she began waving wildly at the new unicorn, calling out to him. “Dylie!”
Shadow rolled his eyes, laying back down onto the wagon, until the supply closet door suddenly began making noises.
“IS THAT DYLAN I HEAR!?” Ish shouted from the other side of the door. “DYLAN! HELP ME! SHADOW’S TRYING TO DROWN ME IN CORN!”
“Wait. We’re drowning Ish in corn?” Dylan looked over to the door. “Can this be a collaborative effort?”
Shadow lifted his head up from the wagon once more, looking over to Dylan. “That depends. Do you have any more corn?”
Twilight placed a hoof on her chin. “Hm… Perhaps he could conjure one up using his new horn?”
“I could?” Dylan blinked, looking up at his horn once more. “That’s a thing?”
“Oooh.” Shadow began to sit upwards instead of laying on the wagon. “This I gotta see.”
After a moment, Twilight noticed the fact that Shadow was inside of the wagon. “...Why are you inside of a wagon?”
“Ishtaba.”
“...Makes enough sense, I suppose...” Twilight shrugged, looking over to the stroller she had also brought along, which carried their foals.
“Wait…” Dylan looked over to Twilight. “Twilight, how do I actually do the magics? Is there an instruction manual?”
“Oh.” Twilight broke her attention to the foals, and looked back at the new unicorn. “Well, uh. It mostly requires a lot of concentration, and—”
“WALLA-KA-ZAM!” Dylan shouted, as his horn quickly began to glow brown-ish red. With a quick flash of light, something that looked like a corn, but appeared very deformed, and also seemed to be multiple random colors.
“That… Doesn’t look right…” Shadow raised an eyebrow, slowly reaching his hoof towards the imposter corn as it continued to float in the air by Dylan’s magic.
“Nonsense!” Dylan shrugged, walking with the corn towards the door. “Just put it in his mouth and say ‘Konichiwa’, I’m sure it will work itself out.”
Shadow looked at the door, then back at the corn, looking back and forth as he thought about Dylan’s idea. After enough thought, he shrugged. “Alright.”
After a little bit of effort, Dylan managed to push the wagon just enough to allow him to open the supply closet.
“DYLAN! YOU’VE COME TO MY RESCU—mmmfph!”
“Konichiwa, Senpai!” Dylan cheerfully spoke, slamming the door, and pushing the wagon back in front of the door.
“...Y’know, I’m starting to wonder if eating that imposter corn was a healthy choice or not…” Shadow thought aloud.
“Meh. He’ll be fine.” Dylan shrugged. “Worst case scenario, we’ll just ship him to the hospital.”
“We’re already in a hospital, though…” Shadow deadpanned.
“This is a hospital?” Dylan blinked. “I better get insurance while I’m here…”
Shadow simply facehoofed.
“So, what’re we doing here, anyway?” Dylan looked around.
“Dash is in labor.”
“Who?”
“Rainbow Dash… Jorge’s wife…”
“Wait…” Dylan jerked his head to the canadian. “...Jorge is married!? Why the fuck haven't I been told this until now?”
“No one’s told you?” Shadow cocked his head to the side. “They’ve been married for almost a year, now… I could’ve sworn someone told you…”
“I’m pretty sure I’d remember that, it’s not like I’ve left my room much…” Dylan shook his head.
“Huh...” Shadow blinked. “What about the multiple times they’ve visited? You never noticed anything about the two of them being so close together?”
“I don’t know. I spent most of my time in my room like I said, I mostly stayed outta the way when you had visitors. Plus, the Pink One keeps abducting me to make her explosives…” Dylan explained, pointing over to the mare sitting on her seat.
“You’ve left your room a couple of times, you’ve never, not once, caught the two of them making out or anything?” Shadow raised an eyebrow. “Hell, I’m pretty sure Twilight and I have caught them too many damn times…”
“Well, if I have, it was briefly. Even then, I’ve never caught wind of her name, really, nor did I assume you, let alone both of you, would get married in a few years.” Dylan remarked “And on that point, I still think y’all are idiots, especially you.”
“What do you mean?” Shadow’s head tilted to the side.
“Y’alls relationships were incredibly quick. It would be fine with me if y’all hadn’t had kids as quick as ya did. It’s just not something I agree with, parenthood is a sensitive subject for me...Plus your name’s still retarded.”
“May I note to you, Dylan…” A familiar voice spoke, walking out of the patient’s room. “Whether you’ll believe it or not, is not my concern. But at the very least, my wife’s pregnancy was due to Shadow’s sister-in-law being a dick with her magic. I also shouldn't forget to mention that I’ve been with Dash for three years, one of those years having been spent together in marriage. In fact, our one year anniversary’s coming up pretty soon...”
Shadow looked over to the source of the voice, finding the familiar cuban outside of the patient’s room. “Woah, suddenly Jorge’s out.”
“Well, that pisses me off more.” Dylan grumbled. “I can’t really fault you for that, that’s just incredibly insensitive of whichever sister-in-law that is. If I was in that circumstance, I woulda gone serious Quigz on someone’s ass…”
“It’s alright, though.” Jorge scratched the back of his head. “Dash and I… we’re fine with it…” He then noticed Dylan’s new appearance. “Oh, hey, the spell worked. Not bad...”
Pinkie lifted a hoof. “Does this mean we get to see the foals, now?”
Jorge shook his head. “Not yet, Pinks.”
“Aw…”
“Well that explains what’s going on with you, and yours was the longer relationship to boot, apparently.” Dylan nodded, looking over to the canadian. “Now the hell does that leave you, Shadow?”
“Uhh…” Shadow blinked, quickly pointing over to his wife. “It’s Twilight’s fault!”
Upon hearing her name, Twilight’s attention was caught. “What was my fault?”
“According to Shadow, parenthood was a one way street for you two.”
“Oh.” Twilight blinked. “You mean the whole pregnancy was my doing? Uh… Yeah, that sounds about right.”
“Has no one heard of planned parenthood here?” Dylan raised an eyebrow, looking around the entire casts of ponies sitting in their seats.
“It was planned!” Twilight stomped a hoof on the floor. “Just… not by both parties…”
“I’m pretty sure that defeats the purpose…” Dylan narrowed his eyes.
“Not necessarily.” Twilight shook her head. “I mean, we’ve been together for almost two years, now… I just… might… have been a little impatient...”
”So this is what I walked into…” Jorge muttered to himself.
“Well that’s...fine...I guess.” Dylan shrugged. “It’s probably just a combination of my OCD and deep emotional trauma on the subject that makes me a little peeved, though albeit Jorge’s relationship was a pretty normal pace from what I’m hearing, and a pretty healthy and trusting one at that.”
Jorge blinked, looking over to the canadian in the wagon. “Did you tell him anything about that?”
Shadow shook his head. “As far as I’m aware, no.”
“...Deep emotional trauma?” Twilight raised an eyebrow.
“My life is a series of unfortunate events…and death...”
“That… sounds terrible…” Twilight winced softly. “I’m so sorry to hear that, Dylan…”
”The fuck’s going on…” Jorge raised an eyebrow.
“Eh, it was a long time ago, and I’ve made my peace with those demons, even if those are the kind of wounds that don’t heal well…” Dylan sat with a sigh.
Fluttershy slowly began inserting herself into the conversation. “Are you sure you’re okay?”
”I just came out here to talk about the foals…”
“All it takes is some trusting support and love...though I do technically lack a family, and all I have are two and a half men here.” Dylan said with a sigh. “Even then, this kinda thing isn’t all too uncommon on Earth.”
Shadow and Jorge looked at each other, until they both quickly realized the “half man” was just the asian locked in the supply closet.
“Well… If you ever need anything, you have all of us, now…” Fluttershy commented, attempting to reassure the unicorn.
“I’ll take you up on that sometime, yeah.” Dylan nodded, looking over to the cuban as he slowly realized his existence. “Oh hey Jorge, is she dead?”
Jorge narrowed his eyes. “Seriously?”
“I find that assuming death leads to less surprises.”
The cuban simply rolled his eyes. “Dash is not dead. And she’s now currently with the foals.”
“So everything went well th—foals? As in, more than one?” Shadow’s eyes widened.
“Foals!?” Pinkie’s eyes also widened, preparing to burst through the patient’s door, only to receive a glare from the red pegasus.
“I am not afraid to stop you.” Jorge monotoned.
“Oh yeah?” Pinkie narrowed her eyes. “Good luck trying.”
“You think I’d have to try?” Jorge raised an eyebrow. “It’s not that hard when you have wings.”
“Curses.” Pinkie grumbled, sitting back down on her seat. “You win this round, Cuban.”
“Wait, so does this mean we get to visit now?” Twilight cut in.
Jorge kept his focus on Pinkie for another moment, before looking over to the alicorn and nod in response. “Yeah. Two visitors at a time, just like the last time.”
“I’ll go whenever, I’d think Shadow and Twilight would want to go first anyway.” Dylan shrugged.
“Speaking of which, Dylan…” Twilight poked the brown-ish red unicorn. “Could you keep an eye on the foals for me while I’m in there? It’ll only just be for a few minutes.”
“Yeah sure, take as long as you need.”
“‘Kay, thanks!” Twilight slowly pushed the stroller towards him. “It won’t take that long.”
Meanwhile, Jorge looked over to Pinkie, who appeared to be eyeing the stroller as it was brought into Dylan’s possession. He then looked over to Dylan with a deadpan look.
“Don’t be afraid to use magic on her if you need to.”
Dylan nodded. “Besides the whole concentration bit a little while ago, Twilight mentioned a thing or two, granted that was before I realized i had a horn.”
Jorge nodded, turning around to open the door to Dash’s room, walking into the room, allowing Twilight and Shadow to follow suit.
As Shadow and Twilight slowly walked into the room, they immediately noticed Dash, mane disheveled, face damp from tears, and in fact, still struggling to hold back tears as she held her two foals.
Jorge looked down at their newly born foals, fully taking them in for the first time. The first foal was a filly, and looked like a miniature version of Dash, though the tail looked more rough around the edges, however the eyes were the same color. The other was blatantly a colt, and seemed to take more after his father. His mane was still the same color as his mother’s, though the ends seemed to darken in color, seeming almost black at times. The overall color of his body was a darker blue version of Dash. His mane seemed naturally spiky, though smoother than his father’s, while his tail kept straight, and his eyes matched those of his father.
Shadow walked up to the cuban, who had been standing next to his wife’s bed, smiling at the foals she held in her embrace.
“A certain cuban told me a month ago… ‘So, twins, eh?’”
Jorge chuckled, looking up to the canadian. “The roles have changed, haven’t they?”
“Looks like it.” Shadow nodded, looking back over to the foals. “Only difference is you two actually knew ahead of time…”
“I’m glad we did, though.” Jorge commented. “You know how much hell we’d be going through setting up the foals’ room if we hadn’t known we’d be having two?”
“It’s a good thing my wife’s good enough with magic to make most of those problems less of a hassle.” Shadow snickered.
The two stallions simply kept looking at the foals while Twilight kept commenting on them every so often, saying how beautiful they were, and how she was so happy for her friend.
“...You were right.” Jorge spoke up.
“Hm?” Shadow raised an eyebrow.
“It was worth it.” Jorge nodded. “Having my hoof nearly broken? It was worth being here with her during the whole thing.”
“Yeah?” Shadow smiled softly. “Mine was just a bit off from being broken. So hearing that yours got nearly broken sounds like you had it less bad than I did.”
“After all the shit I’ve been through... Tirek, the truth spell, I think I’ve just gotten used to it…”
Shadow scratched the back of his neck. “Yeah… Sorry about that truth spell, though.”
Jorge shook his head. “It was probably needed. I might have not been where I am now had you guys decided not to use it.”
“Jorge, it’s not every day where I apologize to you.” Shadow reminded him. “Either take it, or leave it.”
Jorge chortled. “I’ll take it.”
“Good.” Shadow patted the cuban on the back. “Cause that’s the first and last time you’ll hear me apologizing.”
“Whatever you say, Shadow…” Jorge rolled his eyes.
The two stayed silent for a moment, watching as the foals feel asleep in their mother’s embrace.
“So… what’re their names?” Shadow asked.
“We haven’t figured it out, yet…” Dash muttered softly.
“Really?” Shadow raised an eyebrow. “Twilight and I just knew their names the second we saw them, and you two are still having trouble?”
“I’m not good with names!” Jorge retorted. “What do you expect from me, a miracle?”
“It’s fine…” Twilight reassured. “Don’t try to think to hard about it. You’ll come up with their names at the right time, don’t worry. It’s not that important right now, anyway…”
Shadow nodded. “Just relax for a little while now that it’s all finally over…”
Dash simply nodded with a smile, before looking back to her foals.
“Alright… Well, we’ll leave you two be.” Twilight muttered softly. “I’m pretty sure the others wanna get a chance to meet the little guys, too.”
Jorge nodded, watching as the couple slowly walked out of the room. Though, before Shadow fully left, he softly called out to him.
“Shadow!”
Shadow stopped in place, turning his head to see the cuban. “Hm?”
“Could you tell Dylan that it’s his turn next?” Jorge requested. “He can bring whoever he wants along with him, as long as it’s not Pinkie.”
Shadow nodded. “Alright, will do.”
And with that, Shadow left, closing the door behind him.
Jorge looked back down at his wife and foals, smiling warmly at the sight of them all having fallen asleep.
“We did good, Dashie…” He whispered, not caring if his wife could hear him or not. “We did good…” He leaned over to her, gently kissing her forehead.
Unfortunately, his little moment was shattered, as the door to their room opened once again, with Dylan walking in first, along with a familiar asian behin—
“SWEET PASTEL PIECE OF SH—”
Jorge immediately reached over for his bat, which he had lying next to the bed, scaring the asian.
Ishtaba immediately cringed. “Uh, y’know what…?” He muttered softly. “I’m just gonna go back to the supply closet…”
Dylan simply watched as Ish walked out of the room. “What’s his problem? It’s just a bat, it’s not you’re violent or anything…”
Jorge looked down at the three lying in bed, sighing softly as he noticed they hadn’t been disturbed from their sleep. He then looked up to the unicorn, whispering softly. “Not usually. But I’ve had to use this bat once or twice on him.”
“Well, as long as I don’t witness any domestic violence, I’m fine.”
“As long as Ish doesn’t do anything stupid, you won’t.”
“Guess we’re just gonna have to make sure he doesn’t do anything stupid, then.”
“I suppose so.” Jorge chuckled.
Dylan slowly walked up to the foals, smiling softly at the sleepyheads.
“Well, isn’t that adorable?”
“It is.” Jorge walked away from the bed, and instead walking over to his friend. “I kinda wish I had my phone with me to take a picture of this.”
“You brought your phone with you to Equestria?”
“Hell yeah, I did…” Jorge nodded. “It was mostly unintentional, but I’m glad I did.”
“How do you even get connection out here?”
“I don’t. I’ve mostly just been using it for a bunch of old songs I had on it, and using it to take pictures.”
“And how have you been—”
“Twilight made up some sort of magical charger. I don’t know.” Jorge shook his head. “As for storage, I still have an SD card on it. Pictures don’t take up too much space.”
“Man, now that I think about it, I haven’t really heard music all too much since getting here.”
“Maybe one of these days we can start a little get-together. Just like old times.” Jorge smiled softly. “Just you, me, and Shadow.”
“And Ish, because we all know he’d show up regardless.” Dylan added.
“True.” Jorge laughed quietly, trying not to wake up his wife and foals. “God, it really has been a while, hasn’t it, Dylan?”
“Longer and harder than you know…”
Jorge rolled his eyes at Dylan’s obvious dick joke. “Three years… Man it’s been a while…” He sighed softly. “I kinda miss the good ol’ days when we used to just make dick jokes and play games while we joked about everything…”
“Beauty fades, that is why it is beautiful...” Dylan quoted.
“True that...” Jorge nodded. “But now look at us, Shadow and I have a wife and foals... I have a job… Shadow’s even a friggin prince… It’s all so… surreal…”
“I can atest to that, we are all about twenty-one now. It’s been weird being around so many people again, I’ve mostly kept to myself in the last year or so…” Dylan explained.
“What about Trey? Have you been keeping in touch with him before you arrived?”
“You know him, he pops up once in a blue moon, like he did right before I ended up here actually.”
“Of course he did.” Jorge shook his head. “He always had the worst timing…”
“And I’ve always had the worst luck.”
“I dunno.” Jorge looked at his old friend. “Maybe it’s a good thing you’re here.”
“How so?” Dylan raised an eyebrow.
“Well, I mean, you have us now. And I’m sure the girls are more than happy to help you out whenever you need it.” Jorge explained. “Sure, it may be in a foreign world, and yeah you’re in a foreign body… But… maybe this is something you needed.”
“Maybe. I’ve always been rather mentally resistant, but I can’t help but think about what I’ve left behind.”
“You don’t think I have?” Jorge raised an eyebrow. “At least I had a better life compared to the shit you’ve gone through. My family probably thinks I’m dead, at this point. And you know what sucks? I can’t do anything about it. That portal only serves as a one-way trip, there’s no going back.”
“See, that’s the scary part. I had gone on a trip before college and started living on my own…” Dylan explained. “I never kept in touch with my family, I don’t think they’ve heard from me since Shadow got here, I don’t know if anyone will even notice I’m gone.”
“Then maybe this is your chance to try again.” Jorge used a wing to pat his friend on the back. “Y’know, start anew. But this time you won’t be alone. You’ll have us. All of us. Even Ishtaba, who may not seem like he cares, but I’m pretty sure somewhere inside his heart, he really does.”
“Starting anew, hm? Let’s hope you’re right about that.” Dylan looked over to his cuban friend. “It would give me a chance to move on.”
“Yeah… It’s just gonna take some time.” Jorge noted to him. “But I think you’ll be able to get through it, you just need some support, that’s all.”
“Yeah, you guys have left quite the act to follow. You’ve started a family in three years...and Shadow in two.”
Jorge snickered. “Yeah, well... It certainly wasn’t easy. Especially on the first year when all I had were just the girls. Shadow and Ish didn’t arrive until year two for me.”
“Well at least you didn’t start a national crisis on arrival.” Dylan chuckled.
“You can thank Princess Celestia for that one.” Jorge chuckled along with him. “She even had this whole ceremony to introduce the ‘first human in Equestria’, and show off how I came in peace, with no intent to hurt anypony.”
“How’d that turn out? I’m not built for that kind of lime-light.”
“I didn’t take it very seriously.” Jorge shook his head. “I tried playing a ‘game’ with the audience called ‘The Price is Rice’.” He laughed at the memory. “It was pretty funny. Hell, one of the ponies in the audience even played along.”
“‘The Price is Rice’, that sounds fantastic.” Dylan chuckled
“Oh, it was.” Jorge’s laughter died down. “It’s taken awhile, but everyone’s kinda just known me for being serious when I want to be, and quite the cynical little faggot when I don’t. When in reality, when I’m alone with Dash... I’m usually more calm and collected.”
“Hey, at least you got it figured out quickly. It took me awhile to find where I stood.” Dylan commented. “Hell, sometimes I still don’t know.”
Jorge looked over to his wife, who was still sleeping with the foals in her embrace. “You’ll get there too, Dylan.” He reassured his friend. “It’s just gonna take some time.”
Then, to interrupt their moment, the door to the room opened. Jorge and Dylan looked over to the door, watching as a buttercup colored pegasus slowly walked in.
“Oh… Did I show up at a bad time?” Fluttershy whispered softly. “I’ll just come back late—”
“No, you’re good.” Jorge shook his head. “Dash is just sleeping at the moment…”
“And what about you two?” Fluttershy tilted her head to the side. “Are you two alright?”
“Yeah. We’ve just been catching up.” Jorge explained. “It’s been awhile since Dylan and I got to actually sit down and chat one-on-one…”
“A little of this and that.” Dylan added. “It’s been nice to laugh again...Jorge could always bring me up.”
“That’s good to hear…” Fluttershy smiled. “Do you two mind if I stay for a while? I wouldn’t want Pinkie to burst in here and wake up the foals…”
“You’re good.” Jorge shook his head.
“Yes, that’s quite alright.” Dylan nodded. “The Pink One would just make a mess of this.”
“Um… Why are you calling her that, by the way?” Fluttershy raised an eyebrow.
“It’s like an old story from where we’re from. If you say her name too many times she shows up. I believe it was called Beetlejuice…”
“Oh…” Fluttershy nodded in understanding. “I think I get it.”
“It’s silly superstition, but after Jorge sacrificed me to her, I’d rather be safe than sorry.”
“Way to make me feel like a dick, Dylan…”
“I’m not wrong, am I?”
“No, you’re not.” Jorge shook his head. “I just didn’t need to be reminded of it.” The cuban looked over to his wife, and slowly walked over to her bed, grabbed a nearby chair, and sat on it, resting his head on the bed. So he’d be right there when she’d eventually wake up.
“Yea, I think that quote is pretty fitting for moment like this, Jorge…”
Jorge’s ear twitched. “The whole ‘beauty fades’ quote?”
“Yep... just make your peace, Jorge, you never know when it’s going to fade. But most of the time it works out, for there's beauty in even a wilted rose.”
Jorge thought on Dylan’s words for a bit, until a new thought came to mind. He lifted his head, and looked directly at the unicorn.
“Dylan? Let’s start a pact.” Jorge deadpanned. “No matter what happens, we’ll always have each other’s backs, alright?”
“I wouldn’t dream of having it any other way…”
After all the visitors came and left, Jorge and Dash had been left alone with their foals. Dash still needed to spend the night at the hospital to recuperate, and they still needed to do a few checkups on the foals to make sure they’re healthy. So they had moved her into a different room, which had a bigger bed than the regular hospital rooms, big enough for Jorge to even spend the night with her. But right now, they’re just enjoying their time with them.
“They’re beautiful, Jorge…” Dash spoke softly.
“They are, aren’t they?” Jorge replied. “I’d say the two of us did a pretty good job.”
“Shut up.” Dash giggled.
“What?” Jorge smiled at the sight of his wife laughing. “Just look at ‘em! They clearly borrow my charm!”
“What charm?” Dash raised an eyebrow.
“You’re killin’ me here, Dashie.”
“You’re killing yourself.” Dash stuck her tongue out. “Not my fault you’re lying about yourself.”
The two of them couldn’t help but laugh and smile as they continued to spend time with each other, tossing jokes back and forth, playful remarks here and there. Now that Dash actually had the foals with her, she seemed to carry a more happier attitude. Soon enough, they simply began to stare at their foals, unable to look away at the adorable sight before them.
And, eventually, Jorge spoke.
“I got it.”
“Hm?” Dash looked at her husband, eyebrow raised.
“I know what we should name them.”
“Lay it on me, then.”
“Sky Cloud and Thunder Muffin.” Jorge said, carrying a proud smile for the names he chose.
“Really?” Dash raised an eyebrow, trying hard not to cringe in disgust.
“Think you can come up with anything better?”
“Jorge, anything would be better than those names.” Dash deadpanned.
“Alright then, since you’re so good with names, let’s hear some.”
Dash looked down at the foals, searching for the perfect names in her mind.
“Prism Night…” She named the colt. “...and Spectrum Breeze.”
“Prism Night and Spectrum Breeze, eh?” Jorge raised an eyebrow, looking at the foals again as he thought about the names she chose. “Those… aren’t that bad, actually… Better than anything I can come up with...”
“You think so?” Dash raised an eyebrow. “I kinda just… thought them up on a whim, y’know?”
“Well I mean, if you don’t like those names, we could always just go back to Thund—”
“Over my dead body.” Dash interrupted with a deadpan look. “Prism Night and Spectrum Breeze it is!”
Jorge chuckled softly at his wife’s retort. Looking over to their foals to see them slowly rise from their slumber. They looked up at both of their parents, and smiled. Jorge couldn’t help but lean in, and gently kiss the top of their heads.
“Welcome to the world, little ones…” He smiled warmly. “We’ve been expecting you…”
https://camo.derpicdn.net/7d2e5269d6001e9cc15d4b2f2d2a45a283e433b4?url=https%3A%2F%2Flh6.googleusercontent.com%2FFV-RAihjdKQN6K6mnNdSf3_TCBm4A3XBnWYFWBrbInnQO30Zl0qgrmkfCo-foCQ6zWg7sPggsRg_XT2y5eiYOQWTVSiNhcCBZnlaqDGAU1VE4k9VTHNqAT0LHcgoQDOsBw
Author's Note
Art for the now pony Dylan made by Jdbener (https://www.fimfiction.net/user/Jdbener),  
and the art for the end of the chapter made by Daszkin (https://www.fimfiction.net/user/Daszkin). shoutouts to the both of them!
Welp, looks like we've finally reached the end!
...Or have we?

//-------------------------------------------------------//
                   Chapter 3.5-1: Jorge                    
//-------------------------------------------------------//
Chapter 3.5-1: Jorge
Jorge closed the castle doors behind him, letting himself in instead of knocking on the door like he normally would. Mostly because he figured they’d let him in anyway after all the times he’s knocked.
Walking down the hall, he simply made his way over to Dylan’s room, wondering what his friend would be up to. He knocked on the door, half-expecting Dylan to shout something at the door. Only to have no such reaction, or any reaction at all, actually.
“Dylan?” The cuban raised an eyebrow, knocking on the door once more. “You in there? It’s me, Jorge.”
But yet, despite his announcement, Jorge had not received any reaction whatsoever.
He rolled his eyes, knowing Dylan couldn’t possibly be sleeping at this time. He grabbed the doorknob, twisting it as he pushed the door open.
Upon entering his room, he couldn’t seem to find Dylan anywhere in plain sight. Jorge, knowing Dylan, figured his friend was hiding somewhere. And it soon became his mission to find him.
He checked the closets, under his bed, between his mattress and bed frame, and any other strange location he could think of. Only to conclude…
Dylan wasn’t in the room.
Jorge mentally facepalmed with his non-existent hand, and proceeded to leave the room.
Walking down the hall once more, he began looking around the open rooms to see if he could find anypony in sight. It wasn’t until he had walked further into the castle when he heard voices in the distance.
”I’m not trying that pie!”
”Fine! Shadow, you try the pie!”
”Why don’t you try the pie?”
”I made the pie!”
”Exactly! Which is why—”
Jorge opened the door a crack, poking his head through to see Twilight, Shadow, and Dylan all arguing about a pie the male unicorn held in his magical grasp. “What’s going on in here?”
“Jorge should try the pie!” Shadow finished his sentence, sighing in relief over the cuban’s appearance.
“Wait, what?” Jorge blinked, immediately having his face stuffed with a slice of pie before he could say anything else.
Dylan smiled in amusement, as he watched Jorge slowly began chewing the pie. “Welllllll? How’s it taste?”
Jorge continued to chew the pie for a few more moments, before promptly grabbing a trashcan that Twilight had given him, and spitting it out.
He waited for a moment, before looking at both of the stallions in the room. “Next time you two have some experiment, or whatever the fuck this was… Leave me out of it.”
“Can’t promise that.” Shadow shook his head. “But I’ll try.”
“So, how’d it taste, Jorge?” Dylan asked.
“Like garbage.” The cuban bluntly stated. “It felt like I was eating metal or something…”
“Oh. That’s because it used to be a bucket.”
“It what!?”
“Yeah, I turned a bucket into a pie with my magic!” Dylan gleefully smiled. “Cool, huh?”
“Couldn’t you at least try to make it taste like an actual pie?!” Jorge stomped a hoof onto the floor.
“Well, I could have made it taste like pie, but that would have blown your tiny mind.” Dylan said as he casually floated toward the ceiling.
Jorge stopped for a moment to think about Dylan’s statement. “...Did you just imply you were going to make a pie flavored p—why are you on the ceiling?”
“Why aren’t you on the ceiling?” Dylan raised an eyebrow.
“Dylan, we talked about this.” Shadow sighed. “Stop walking on the ceiling.”
“Make me.” Dylan retorted.
“I will fly up there, and I will throw you onto the ground.”
“Fuck. I forgot you can fly…”
Jorge looked over to his canadian friend as Dylan casually floated back down onto the ground. “When did this start happening?”
“After he made that ‘corn’ we fed to Ish.” Shadow shrugged. “Ever since he realized he could use magic, he’s… been having a little too much fun with it.”
Jorge looked at Dylan, stared at the unicorn for a moment, then back to the canadian.
“I say we slap a magic inhibitor on his horn.”
“And this is where I behave myself to avoid the scary canadian and maniacal cuban.”
“Thought so.” Jorge smiled confidently.
“So you’ll take a threat from Jorge. But when Twilight and I threaten you, you won’t care?”
“Jorge is cuban.” Dylan shook his head. “Therefore, his threats have more substance to them.”
“But… Twilight’s an alicorn!” Shadow retorted.
“I’ve met this woman like… a month ago, I still don’t know what an alicorn is, to be honest.”
“Out of all the ponies you met, how many have you seen that have both wings and a horn?”
“Wait. There are ponies that have both wings and a horn!?”
Jorge simply deadpanned. Looking over to the princess who’s been silent this entire time.
“How are the foals, Twilight?”
“Twilight has wings and a horn!?” Dylan shot his attention over to the purple alicorn.
“They’re taking a nap at the moment, but otherwise they’re doing fine. What about you?”
“Jorge, who else has wings and a horn?! This is completely irrelevant, but still important, information!”
“They’re fine, Dash fell asleep with the foals, I would’ve joined them, but I’m not exactly in the mood to take a nap.” Jorge shook his head. “So I came here to see what’s up.”
“Well, maybe we can arrange some sort of play date for our foals!” Twilight smiled.
“Ehh… talk to Dash about that one.” Jorge shrugged. “They’re only a week old, after all.”
”Oooh, naps. I think I’ll go lay down for a bit, yeah that sounds good.”
“Yeah, and Midnight and Emerald are a month old, what’s your point?” Twilight raised an eyebrow.
“My point is you figure that out with Dash, I don’t like planning things.” Jorge shook his head, extending a rear leg, tripping a certain brown-ish red unicorn, preventing him from leaving the room.
“What the fuck, Jorge?!” Dylan shouted. “Your problems were leaving! I was about to go take a nap!”
“Yeah, well. We’re going to clear up a ton of things that you’ve been oblivious to.”
“Sure thing, whore-hey.”
Jorge stopped for a moment, having not heard that nickname in a while. He took a deep breath, and sighed softly, he then proceeded to help the unicorn back up onto his hooves. He then pointed over to Twilight. “Twilight has both wings and a horn. That’s what’s known as an alicorn here in Equestria.”
“And why does she have wings and a horn?”
“Because she’s a princess.”
“Wait, this is a monarchy!?”
“Oh boy, we have a lot of work to do…”
“Cryo!” Ish shouted, hoping his adoptive “bro” would hear him from several rooms away. “Where my anti-baseball bat shield at?”
“Didn’t you leave it by the door?”
Ish looked towards the entrance to his apartment, noticing his makeshift shield, composed of a bunch of pillows, rope, and a thin metal plate on the front. “We gucci fam.”
“You heading out?”
“Yeah, just don’t want to get killed by a stray bat.”
Cryo walked out of his room, walking over to the door where Ish now stood. “Can I come with?”
“Sure. Maybe we can meme something.”
Cryo simply rolled his eyes, following Ish as they exited the apartment.
“Alright, when I open the door, just be very quiet, Dash might still be asleep and I don’t wanna wake her.”
“Alright.” Twilight nodded softly.
As the two made their way over to the cuban’s house, they noticed a familiar human, who seemed to be heading towards the same destination.
“Twilight? I’m gonna need a bat.”
“Why?”
“No time to explain, I need a bat, right now.”
And just like that, Twilight had conjured up a metal baseball bat, and giving it to Jorge. Who proceeded to grab the bat, and chuck it at the human.
Cryo, having seen Jorge grab the bat, walked a couple feet away from Ish, letting him deal with it on his own.
Suddenly, Ish had noticed something quickly coming into view from the corner of his eye. He quickly reacted by holding his shield outwards, and hiding behind it. Only for the bat to hit the shield, but ultimately break the weak material, and proceeded to hit Ish in the face anyway.
Twilight blinked. “That explains why you needed the bat…”
Eventually, Jorge and Twilight had reached the entrance to the house, noticing Ish groaning in pain softly a few feet away.
Jorge walked over to the asian, rolling his eyes as he poked his leg. “You know, you wouldn’t be in this situation right now if you hadn’t constantly bursted into people’s homes randomly.”
“Noted…”
Jorge looked over to Cryo. “Heya, Cryo!” He waved. “Wanna come in?”
Cryo looked over to the human crying on the ground in the fetal position, then back at Jorge. “Sure!”
As they quietly made it into the house, Jorge closed the door behind him, while the others continued into the living room.
“Well, I’m guessing Dash is still asleep, so if you wanna wait for her to wake up, Twilight. Feel free.” Jorge explained.
“I’ll wait. Besides, I have to ask Cryo a few questions.” Twilight looked over to the colt, who had already been watching TV, with the volume low.
Jorge simply nodded, and made his way over to his room, where his wife had fallen asleep.
Twilight sat next to Cryo, patting his back gently with a wing. “So, Cryo… How’s life with Ishtaba?”
Upon entering his room, he quickly noticed his wife, under the covers, holding the foals on top of her, as the three of them slept.
He smiled at the sight, walking over to the three of them, as he gently kissed Dash’s forehead. He then gently grabbed the foals, pulling them out of their mother’s grasp, and taking them back to their crib that Dash had insisted on moving to this very room.
Once he had gotten them onto the crib without disturbing them from their sleep, Jorge made his way back over to the bed, noticing Linda sleeping on his side of the bed. He chuckled softly with a roll of his eyes, and gently moved her someplace where she couldn’t disturb him. He set his glasses down on top of the dresser, and layed in bed next to his wife.
As much as he wanted to wake her up, he decided against it. And instead lied down on his back, looking at the ceiling as he began contemplating his life.
To think, this all started due to a dare just a few years ago. That single dare started all of these events that have now become his life. How he was able to arrive in Equestria the first time is a mystery he’ll probably never be able to solve. Nor would he want to at this point, considering everything he has here. He befriended the bearers of the elements (despite having stolen the elements once), married his waifu, and now here he is, with his wife and foals.
The only thing that irked him somewhat was having his friends around to bother him, but then again, things wouldn’t be the same without them around.
Except for Ish, he could do without him.
He looked over to Dash, her chest rising and falling slowly, he simply smiled. Never had he thought he’d be spending the rest of his life with a cartoon pony. Hell, if he went back in time to tell himself, he would’ve been called insane, by himself.
Eventually, Dash had stirred a bit, grumbling something unintelligible, until she turned to face her husband, and wrap her hooves around him. All while still being asleep.
Moments like these were always the most precious for Jorge, only he had seen this softer side of Rainbow “Danger” Dash, the coolest mare in Equestria. While she had let this softer side of hers out a little, she still opened up more to him behind closed doors.
He hoped that moments like these would never stop happening.
He looked back over to his wife, having lost track of time, and slowly tried to pull himself out of her embrace, it worked somewhat, but it only gave him enough time to turn from laying on his back, to laying on his side, directly facing her. Once he had gotten into position, she then grabbed him once more, humming softly.
Having figured it was about time she got up, he gently called her name. “Dash…” He moved around gently, trying to see if he could coax her awake. “Dashie…” Though despite his efforts, she refused to wake up. “Rainbow…”
After enough stirring and calling her name, she groaned gently, her eyes opening slowly as she began to return to the real world.
“Welcome back, sleepyhead…” Jorge muttered. “We’ve been expecting you.”
“Hey…” Dash muttered back, ignoring his playful jest. “How long have I been out?”
“About an hour, I wanna say…”
Dash let go of her husband, freeing her hooves so she could rub her eyes. “An hour, huh?” She stifled a yawn. “It feels like it’s been longer…”
Jorge grabbed his glasses from the nearby drawer, putting them back on. “Might have been, I haven’t been keeping track.”
Dash slowly sat upright, looking at the crib nearby. “You put the foals back in the crib?”
“Indeed I did.” Jorge nodded in response, slowly leaving the bed. “I figured I’d come wake you up, so you wouldn’t be up all night again.”
Dash nodded back. “Yeah, thanks…”
“Mhm. Anyway, I’mma be out in the living room if you need me. Twilight’s here and I don’t wanna leave her alone out there.”
“Twilight’s here?”
“Yeah. She wanted to ask you something, dunno what.”
“Tell her I’ll be out there in a sec, alright?”
“WIll do.”
As Dash slowly closed the door behind her, she made her way towards the living room, hearing a conversation getting louder as she got closer.
“Look, I just don’t think Cryo belongs in that kind of environment.”
“Twilight, I get that you’re a month into this whole mothering thing, and it’s given you this seventh sense. But you didn’t have a problem with this a few months ago.”
“Yeah, well, maternal instincts finally kicked in. And after talking with Cryo I now realize he does not belong with Ish.”
“What do you plan on doing then, Twilight? Take him back to the orphanage? The three of us agreed we weren’t gonna do that.”
“I don’t know, Jorge. I don’t know. I’ll… I’ll figure something out, alright?”
“Hey, what’s going on?” Dash finally arrived to the living room, an eyebrow raised having heard the final few sentences of what appeared to be a pretty long conversation.
“Oh! You’re awake!” Twilight cheered. “Are the foals awake too, or…?”
“Nah, they’re still napping.” Dash shook her head. “What’s going on with Cryo?”
“Twilight decided that Cryo shouldn’t be living with Ish anymore. And as Princess, she’s more than allowed to take him away.” Jorge explained. “I’m trying to tell her it’s a bad idea, but she’s determined to say otherwise.”
“And what, may I ask, kind of plan do you have, Jorge?”
“Right now, nothing. But taking Cryo away when Ish is convinced he is Cryo’s legal guardian is a bad idea.”
“Well, you should’ve thought about that before we changed the papers to have your name on it.”
“The agreement was that if Ish proved to be a terrible father to Cryo, which he hasn’t done yet. Then we’d take Cryo away. We went over this with Shadow, Twilight. Yeah, he’s not doing a very good job, but he’s not terrible yet.”
“Camping out in the Everfree Forest for a month.”
“...Alright, you got me there. That was pretty shitty.”
“Jorge. I’m taking Cryo. End of Discussion.”
“Doesn’t Shadow get a say in this?” Jorge raised an eyebrow.
“I already talked it over with Shadow, he more than agrees with this decision.”
“Of course he does…” Jorge rolled his eyes. “Alright, Twilight, where are we gonna leave him? You have enough problems on your hooves to be taking care of a ten year old colt.”
“Jorge, if it’s that big a deal, we can take care of him.” Dash shrugged.
“See?” Twilight pointed at Rainbow. “Not a problem anymore.”
Jorge blinked, looking over to his wife. “Wait, really? Are you sure, Dash?”
“Sure! He hasn’t been a problem the multiple times he’s spent the weekend.” Dash replied. “Besides, he’s been more help than harm. I don’t see why not.”
“If you say so, Dash…”
“Alright then, problem solved!” Twilight stood from her seat, then looked over to Dash. “Oh, by the way, I wanted to talk to you about something.”
Dash raised an eyebrow. “And what’s that?”
“Do you think we can arrange a playdate for the foals some time?”
Author's Note
Annnnnd here we go.
P.S: pls look at this it's important kinda not really just read it anyway pls (https://www.fimfiction.net/blog/682855/whoop-hilie-shitpost-pls-read)

//-------------------------------------------------------//
                  Chapter 3.5-2: Ishtaba                   
//-------------------------------------------------------//
Chapter 3.5-2: Ishtaba
“You’re doing what!?”
“We’re taking Cryo out of your hands. And we’re putting him in a more deserving home.” Twilight flatly replied.
“So basically, right here?” Ish raised an eyebrow. “I don’t see the issue here honestly.”
“Cryo Flare is now under the custody of Jorge and Rainbow Dash.” Twilight’s horn began to glow, as several papers grouped together, tapping themselves onto her desk as they aligned perfectly.
“Wat.” Ish blinked, looking over to Shadow, who stood next to his wife. “And you knew about this?”
Shadow shrugged. “Somewhat. I was kinda eating some leftover ice cream when Twilight mentioned this to me.”
“Fucking slut...”
“I heard that.” Shadow rolled his eyes.
“Look. Ish, you’re a…” Twilight paused for a moment to find a word to compliment him with, but failed to do so.
“An overall amazing guy?” Ish raised an eyebrow, wondering if that was enough to finish her sentence.
“An annoying little shit.” Shadow corrected.
Twilight nodded to Shadow’s insult. “Yeah, that.”
“Motherfucker... I mean, but why though?”
Shadow sighed. “Ish, you camped in the Everfree Forest for a month, somehow got your hands on a metric shit-ton of paper, and barrels, wrote terrible memes on the paper, and ‘Meme Inc’ on the barrels. All while having Cryo involuntarily help you.”
“But ‘was he hurt’ is my question...”
“You brought him into the danger!” Twilight slammed her hooves on her desk. “Whether or not he got hurt doesn’t mean anything in all of this!”
“So what you’re saying is, I managed to protect him from the danger?”
Twilight paused for a moment, wondering if this was another one of his acts of “memery”. She took a deep breath, and sighed. “No, what I’m saying is, during the duration of that month, Cryo had been scared out of his mind, almost unable to sleep due to how fearful he was!”
“The lad didn’t say shit to me. You tryna put words in his mouth now?”
“He did try to tell you!” Twilight growled at the human.
“At no point did he explicitly state that he was scared.”
Twilight looked over to Shadow, whom had his face buried under his hoof, leaving Twilight with no choice but to do the same. She looked back over to Ish, holding back every instinct to blast him to the sun.
“Ish… I talked with Cryo.” Twilight monotoned. “I am not forcing any words down his throat. Everything I’ve been saying has come from him specifically.”
“Oh why didn’t you say that then? Like damn, was that so hard? Honestly, you just nag and nag like my non-existent ex-wife.”
Twilight stood up from her chair, pointing towards the exit. “Ish. Unless you get your shit straight. Cryo will continue to be under Jorge and Dash’s custody. Now, get out.”
“But I—”
“GET OUT!”
*Knock Knock Knock!*
“I got it, Dash!”
Jorge opened the door to his house, wondering who would be standing behind it today.
To his surprise, it was Ishtaba.
Jorge immediately reached over behind the now open door, grabbing his bat once again.
“WAIT!” Ish shouted. “NOT THE BAT PLEASE I HAVE SOMETHING TO SAY!”
Jorge paused, looking over to the asian. “I’m listening.”
“Aight so here’s the play. I am not letting you take my child away from me good sir. I shall hereby convert towards ponification to show my sincerity.”
Jorge deadpanned. “So what you’re trying to say is, you’re gonna start trying to get your shit together?”
“You said this, not me.”
“Ah. Well, if I said it, then it must not be actually happening.”
“Wait no, stop I’m sorry please. Not like this. Feels bad man. I mean it.” Ish pleaded, trying to keep his dignity.
“I won’t believe you until you say it.” Jorge narrowed his eyes.
“NOT LIKE THIS... Yes, Monsieur Jorge the First, I am in fact trying to get my shit together. Fucking bitch...”
If Jorge was still a human, he’d be crossing his arms. “Ish. Could you actually stop being a fucking retard for one moment and actually take things seriously? That’s how you lost Cryo in the first place, dammit.”
“Eighty percent sure it’s cause Twilight a bitch. But fine, I am trying to get my shit together.”
“I’m sorry, what was that?” Jorge raised an eyebrow. “I couldn’t hear you over the fact you were insulting someone.”
“I AM TRYING TO GET MY SHIT TOGETHER.”
“That’s more like it.” Jorge smirked. “Now, what do you need me for, then?”
“Well, uh... what’s it like not having thumbs?”
Jorge paused for a moment, trying to find a decent explanation to Ish’s question. “You get used to it.”
“What’s it like not having to do laundry?”
“Relieving, actually.” Jorge shrugged. “It’s one less problem for me to worry about.”
“You’re actually just a bitch... Sooo, I totally have to go ask Twilight to do the thing don’t I?”
“Well, unless you know another unicorn that could cast the spe—”
“I’ll ask Dylan, perfect plan Jorge!”
And with that, Ish bolted over to Twilight’s castle, where Dylan resided.
“That’s not what I meant…”
Ish bursted into Dylan’s room, not caring if he was awake or not. “DYLAN. I REQUIRE YOUR ASS-ISTANCE!”
Dylan immediately ducked, shoving himself under his bed as he hid from the intruder.
“BREACH DETECTED! SOUND THE ALARMS!”
“NO DYLAN IT’S JUST ME!”
“WE’RE UNDER ATTACK!”
“DYLAN NO!”
“PREPARE FOR THE SKELETON WAR, BITCH!” Dylan shouted, teleporting two mannequins that looked like skeletons in front of his bed.
“WHAT THE FUCK ARE THOSE THINGS!?”
“SKELETON WARRRRRRRR!”
“DYLAN STOP IT’S JUST ME, ISHTABA!”
Dylan poked his head from under the bed, verifying that it was, in fact, the asian.
“Oh. It’s just you.” Dylan calmed down almost instantly, his horn’s glow dieing quickly as his skeletons flopped onto the ground.
Ish sighed a breath of relief. “Dude, what the fuck? Where’d these even come from?”
“My closet.”
“Why the fuck do you have skeletons in your closet!?”
“...Why don’t you have skeletons in your closet?”
Ish paused for a moment. “Good point.”
Dylan took the opportunity to exit from under his bed. With a flash of light, he was now in front of the asian.
“So what brings you here, asian?” He raised an eyebrow.
“Oh, well, see… Jorge suggested I come to you for my problem.”
“I got you my home dawg, whatchu need?”
“I wanna become a horse too.”
“Mhmm…” Dylan placed a thinking hoof on his chin. “And what are your thoughts on cactuses?”
“Dylan, I don’t wanna ask Twilight, she just finished chewing me out several minutes ago.”
“Pfft. You’ll be fiiiiiiine.” Dylan shrugged. “I can ask her for you if you wan—”
“Dylan, I want you to cast the spell.”
“Oh. Uh… Well, you see, I don’t really know how…”
“Dylan. I need you to cast the spell. Please.” Ish begged.
“Alright, I got you fam. At least you probably won’t explode....”
“I’ll have died for a good cause.” Ish nodded. “Leggo.”
Dylan’s horn began to glow softly, covering Ish in his brown-ish red glow. “Aaaaaaand…” Dylan muttered, lifting the asian up into the air. “SHA-ZAAM!” In an instant, a bright flash of light filled the room, blinding him for a moment.
Dylan waited for a moment before opening his eyes, however, once he did, he looked over to where Ish stood.
Only to find a pony shaped cactus in it’s place.
“...Oh.” He blinked. “Uh… this is fine, I can fix this…”
Dylan pointed his horn at the cactus. “KA-ZAAM!” He blasted the cactus’ “face” with magic, hoping he’d be able to get a different result.
To his surprise, he was able to give the cactus an actual face, to which it replied:
“DYLAN! YOU FOOL!”
“You thought I wasn’t serious about the cactus thing…” Dylan rolled his eyes. “Look, I tried to cast the spell, but I don’t know how any of it works. If anything, this is probably just a side effect.”
“‘Probably’ my ass.”
“Yeah…” Dylan scratched the back of his neck. “But look on the bright side, at least you’d make a good lawn ornament!”
“HOW IS THAT A BRIGHT SIDE!?”
“You can finally have a purpose in life!” Dylan cheered. “Wouldn’t that be great?”
“NO! NOT AS A CACTUS!” Ish shouted. “Fuck you and all that you stand for.”
“I’m pretty sure fucking me would be pretty hard as a cactus…” Dylan shrugged. “Let’s just… take you to Twilight…Like you should’ve done in the first place, you dumbass.”
“Y’know what? This is fine.” Ish tried to shake his head, but failed. “Quick! Toss me out the window! I’ll be a perfect lawn ornament!”
Dylan deadpanned. “I’m pretty sure you would scare the local children.”
“Good.”
“Welp! Off we go!” Dylan smiled, grabbing the cactus-asian with his magic, and exiting his room.
“Shadow, could you get the milk I left in the fridge?”
“Yeah, be back in a sec.” Shadow walked out of their bedroom, while Twilight held the foals. Walking from room to room, until he eventually found himself in the kitchen, where he then proceeded to dig in the fridge.
“Hey, Shadow?”
“Yes Dylan?” Shadow spoke, his head still inside the fridge as he searched for Twilight’s milk.
“We may have a problem…”
“What kind of problem?”
“How would you feel about an asian-shaped cactus… that talks?”
“Wha—OW!” Shadow lifted his head up, banging his head on the rim of the fridge. Wincing softly, he pulled his head away, with two bottles of milk in hoof. He looked at Dylan, who had been holding up the cactus with his magic.
“...What’d you do?”
“Well… Ish wanted to be a horse, but he didn’t wanna ask Twilight to do it, so I gave it my best shot.” Dylan explained. “It, uh… It didn’t end well, as you can see...”
“Uh… I’m pretty sure Twilight can fi—did you say the cactus talks?”
“Yeah!” Dylan turned the cactus to face Shadow. ”Say ‘hi’ bitch!”
“I need an adult.” Ish monotoned.
“I am an adult.” Shadow deadpanned.
“I NEED AN ADULTER ADULT!”
“Well Ish… I could always help wit—”
“Nevermind! I’m fine with the adult standing right in front of me!”
Shadow paused for a moment, trying to process the scene happening in front of him. “Okay… One, that’s totally not creepy at all… And two… let’s just take it to Twilight already…”
As the three of them made their way towards Twilight’s bedroom, Shadow walked in first, making Ish and Dylan wait outside.
“Twilight, uh… We have a tiny problem…”
“What’d Dylan screw up?”
“More like what Ish screwed up... With Dylan’s help.”
Twilight blinked, grabbing both of the bottles Shadow held, casting a quick spell to heat them up. “I’ll be out there in a second.”
“Alright.” Shadow walked back out of the room, looking back towards Ish.
“So, Ish… any reason for you wanting to be a ‘horse’ now?”
“Uh… I plead the fifth.”
“You’re not possibly trying to get Cryo back, are you?”
“And what if I am?” Ish raised an non-existent eyebrow.
“Well, I dunno, that would sound like you’re trying to get your shit together…”
Ish rolled his eyes. “Not you too…” He sighed. “Look, I already went through this shit with the cuban. I’d rather not deal with it again from the canadian.”
“Says the asian who’s a talking cactus.” Shadow countered.
“Fuck you, no one asked for your opinion.” Ish retorted.
Dylan slowly raised a hoof. “Well actually I kinda aske—”
“No, no you did not.”
“Hey!” Dylan pointed a hoof at the cactus. “Don’t forget who’s currently holding you in the air. I could turn you into a pie right now if I wanted to!”
Ish’s eyes focused onto Shadow. “And you’re just gonna let him?”
“You got yourself into this mess, I don’t see why not.” Shadow shrugged.
“Alright.” Twilight stepped out of her room, closing the door before she turned around to face the group. As she turned, she spoke. “What’s going o—o-oh…”
Dylan smiled innocently. “Twilight, meet Ish; the first ever talking cactus!”
“Talking cactus?”
“I don’t wanna talk about it…” Ish groaned.
Twilight stopped for a moment to think. “Alright… On the bright side, Dylan seems to have improved greatly with his magic. Well, better than earlier, anyway.” She sighed, grabbing the asian with her own magic, allowing Dylan to let go. “Though on the down side… This might take a while…”
“I’ll leave you to it, then.” Dylan nodded. “I’m headin to Jorge’s for a bit, if anyone needs me...”
“So let me get this straight…” Jorge tried to contain his laughter as he spoke. “You turned Ish into a cactus?”
“Yep!” Dylan nodded. “I think I’m getting better at this whole magic thing!”
“Sounds like it!” Jorge’s laughter finally began to slip, having a hard time holding back at the thought of the asian-cactus. “I gotta admit, I kinda wish I was there for that!”
“Yeah, it was pretty great!” Dylan slowly joined in on his laughter.
As their laughter slowly died down, Jorge looked over to Cryo, who had been in the living room, watching cartoons. Which he found somewhat ironic to him.
Suddenly, a thought came to the cuban. “Oh, I have some leftover pie in the fridge, if you want some.”
“Is it bucket or pie flavored?”
“It’s apple.” Jorge chuckled.
“Sure, I’ll have some.” Dylan nodded.
Moments later, Jorge brought a slice over to Dylan, leaving him to eat it in the dining room. He walked over to the living room to check on Cryo.
“Hiyo!” The cuban smiled. “Mind if I join in?”
Cryo shook his head.
“Sweet!” Jorge jumped onto the couch, causing the young colt to laugh at his childish behavior. “So, what’re we watching?”
“The Adventures of Batmare!”
“Ooh! Sounds cool!” Jorge looked over to the TV, ignoring the fact that it looked like a pony version of the early “Batman” cartoons. “What’s it about?”
“It’s about this superhero team ‘Batmare’ and ‘Redwing’, and they go around fighting crime!”
“Wow!” Jorge feigned shock, which seemed to work, as Cryo seemed eager to continue talking about his new favorite show.
“It’d be so cool to actually meet them!” Cryo added, still focused on his show.
“Kid, you have no idea…” Jorge chuckled.
Cryo looked at the cuban, eyebrow raised. He opened his mouth, about to speak, only to have his attention drawn away by his cartoon once more.
*Knock Knock Knock!*
Jorge lifted his head, looking over to the door. “Who could that be?”
He quickly jumped up off the couch, walking over to the door. He opened it, raising an eyebrow at the stallion that now stood behind it.
“I didn’t think you’d actually go through with it…” Jorge thought aloud.
“Yeah, well, if it’s gonna help get my shit together, I don’t really have a choice, do I?” Ish shrugged, standing in front of Jorge as the panda looking stallion he was the first time they used the spell.
“Well, this is you we’re talking about.” Jorge bluntly stated. “Normally you would’ve just called it quits a long time ago.”
“...Not this time.” Ish stated, giving the cuban a serious look. “I meant what I said. If it’s going to get me Cryo back, then so be it.”
“You do realize that just turning into an earth pony isn’t gonna be enough?”
“It's not?”
“Ish, right now Cryo’s under my custody, which means I have the final say.”
Ish sighed deeply. “What else do I have to do…?”
“Ish, prove to me that you're getting your shit together.” Jorge explained. “Fix your ego, move out of that rinky dinky apartment, drop your whole constant urge to meme, or at least tone it down. And actually make something out of yourself.”
“Rinky dinky my ass, you try and get a good place in this economy.” Ish huffed.
“Ish, look at me. Do I live in some shitty apartment constantly trying to piss everyone off?” Jorge asked. “Look at Shadow, does he try to constantly make a meme out of every Celestia-damned thing he sees?”
“Well, n—”
“No, right?” Jorge interrupted. “I found love with a mare who I'd never thought would even give me a chance, let alone be my wife.” He stomped a hoof on the floor. “And Shadow somehow managed to get his own life straight, despite being in a completely new world with no way back. And you know what? He got married, too.”
“Y-yeah, so?”
“What have you done so far, Ish?”
“Well, I… uh… I did some things… I uh, I had sex with Lyra once…”
“That's another thing, Ish…” Jorge scratched the back of his neck. “You don't know what that signifies here in Equestria?”
“Fuck.”
“Ish, having sex with someone here in Equestria bonds you to them.” Jorge rolled his eyes.
“Am I allowed to legally change my name and become an apache attack helicopter if it means that I don’t have to marry her?”
“No!” Jorge shouted. “Ish, this is a big deal, I don’t know how you’ve gotten away with all of this so far, but this will bite you in the ass sooner or later…”
“So like, that means I’m shit outta luck then. This is worse than having a girl lie about birth control just so you don’t leave her.”
Jorge placed a thinking hoof on his chin. “Well, no. Not exactly. You haven’t really cheated on her, per se.”
“So what you’re saying is I have to be single for life.”
“No, what I’m saying is you need to work something out with Lyra, either find a mutual agreement and end the relationship, or something else that doesn’t get your ass sent to jail.” Jorge paused for a moment. “Because I’m pretty sure the royals aren’t aware of this issue, except for Twilight, possibly.”
“Jail is a reasonable choice in this scenario…”
“And you’re just gonna leave Cryo here? Isn’t that why you went through this process in the first place?” Jorge tapped Ish’s head lightly. “Think, Ish. You have a brain in there for a reason. Fucking use it.”
“My 4.0 GPA doesn’t save me from relationships.”
“No, but it shows you can do something other than piss everyone off everywhere you go.” Jorge scoffed. “4.0 GPA, and you’re living in a dump.”
Ish shrugged, thinking back to when he had been fired not long ago. “Pretty hard to get a job when the entire population of ponies can do literally everything. But wait... now I’m literally part of the entire population of ponies.”
Jorge nodded. “It’s quite the opposite, Ish. Yes, the entire population of ponies can do quite literally everything. But because of this, there’s always a paying job for anything.”
“Seriously?”
“Dead serious.” Jorge replied. “And now that you’re a pony, finding a job isn’t as hard as you’d expect. Hell, if I really wanted to, I could work in the Ponyville weather team now.”
“So what do you expect me to do?”
“Find something you’re good at.” Jorge suggested. “Make a living out of that.” He pointed at Ish’s cutie mark. “That cutie mark means something. Maybe you’re meant to be more than just a douchebag troll.”
Ish looked at his mark. “Didn’t you say these marks represent a pony’s destiny?” He raised an eyebrow, looking back at Jorge.
Jorge nodded. “Ish, I’m telling you all of this for your own good. Because all of us are tired with your arrogant schemes.”
“You could’ve just said some—”
“We have.” Jorge interrupted. “Multiple times.”
“Really?”
“You’ve been so focused on trying to show everyone in Equestria your dank memes, that you’ve been screwing yourself over.” Jorge shrugged. “It’s time to stop.”
Ish stayed silent, looking around him as he mulled over Jorge’s words. Had he been that focused on his memes? Blinded by his acts of memery to the point where he had driven all of his friends away?
“Jorge?” He spoke softly. “We… we’re still friends, right?”
The cuban stayed silent as he looked away from the asian, the serious look on his face fading away to a frown. He looked back at him, unsure of what to tell him.
“I… I don’t know, Ish.” He sighed. “You haven’t acted like a friend, that’s for sure. You not only showed up late to Shadow’s wedding, but interrupted it just to demand doing it all over again because you were late. And then proceeded to do the same thing to my wedding.”
“That’s just one thing thou—”
“You’ve also been unappreciative, unhelpful—”
“Name one time I’ve been unappreciat—”
“When I risked my life to save your ass from Tirek’s destructive magic.”
“Okay, name two tim—”
“Every time Shadow and I have pulled you out of Lyra’s house. And so far it’s been about… six times?”
“Two of those are your fault!” Ish retorted.
“And what about the other four?” Jorge countered.
Ish tried to find a last resort to make him sound less bad than Jorge made him out to be. “What about Dylan?”
“What about him?” Jorge raised an eyebrow.
“How much help has he been?”
“Ish! Dylan’s only been in Equestria for a fucking month!” Jorge stomped a hoof on the floor. “He still lives with Twilight, for fucks sake!”
“Bu—”
“And even then, he still went out of his way to try to help his friends, including you!” Jorge interrupted. “Despite not knowing how to do it, he still tried to turn you into a pony just so you could avoid Twilight.”
“I—
“I heard me being mentioned, whatsup?” Dylan cut in, still eating the slice of pie.
Ish glanced over to the unicorn, who had stood not far behind Jorge. “Dylan’s here?”
“Yeah man, I was just seeing what Jorge was up to, maybe just talk or help out babysitting Cryo, who knows really.”
In an instant, all of Ish’s retorts to use on Dylan faded away. Jorge was right, despite Dylan’s lack of anything here in Equestria, he still managed to help in any way he could, as evidenced right here in front of him.
“So what’s the problem here?” Dylan raised an eyebrow.
Jorge looked over to Dylan. “Maybe you can help me out here, Dylan.” He spoke calmly. “When you were opening up about your depression from back home, who was around to help you out of it?”
“Uh, I’d have to give you the most credit for that one, though Shadow and Twilight helped alot. Flutters and all the others did as well, even The Pink One.” Dylan replied.
“Was Ish, at any point in time, around to help when none of us were?”
“I ran into him during one of my pinkie abductions, and again when out with Flutters one time...I’m pretty sure he called me a fag or some other memey insult both times.”
Jorge looked over to Ish, wearing a serious look once again. “Shall I go on?”
“N-no… I got it.” Ish scratched the back of his neck. “I… I really fucked up this time…”
“So wait, why is all of this relevant?” Dylan cocked his head to the side.
“Ish wants Cryo back, but before he can gain custody again, he needs get his life straight.” Jorge explained. “Twilight noticed that Ish has been too selfish and too arrogant to have custody in the first place, so now he’s under my care until further notice.”
“Well, no matter how noble at first, a selfish deed is always selfish.” Dylan responded. “Just do what I do, Ish, start looking for a job and appropriate housing. Also be nice to people, that helps.”
Ish looked down at the ground, having still stood outside of Jorge’s house. Multiple thoughts had begun to plague his mind. Was there still any hope for him? Could he actually turn around and fix two year’s worth of damage that he had created?
“Do…” He looked up at the two stallions in front of him. “Do you think there’s still a chance for me?”
“That’s on you, Ish.” Jorge shrugged. “If you can fix your ego, and if you’re willing to do what’s right. Then maybe.”
Ish looked at the two for a few moments, before he slowly turned around. “I… I need some time alone…”
Before the two could even say anything else, the asian began walking away, muttering something they couldn’t understand.
Jorge simply closed the door, looking over to Dylan with a concerned look.
Dylan casually looked over to Jorge, oblivious to the serious scene that just occurred before him. “I think we broke Ish.”
*Knock Knock Knock!*
Ish waited impatiently in front of Lyra’s door, unsure if anyone was home or not. He looked around, watching as other ponies continued on with their business. He had looked up, and noticed a few pegasi clearing the skies for the weather, and off towards a few shops, as ponies walked in and out, living out their daily lives.
Fortunately enough, the door in front of him opened, catching his attention as his head snapped towards the now open door, revealing Lyra standing behind it.
“Don’t tell me, you’re dead again?” She deadpanned, recognizing his pony body.
“N-No.” Ish shook his head. “I… I just wanna talk.”
“About?”
“Well, for starters, after two years of being in Equestria, I finally realized what having sex here signifies.” Ish began. “And… I wanna set things right before I get kidnapped again, or something.”
Lyra simply lifted an eyebrow. “I’m listening…”
“I know that having sex bonds you to the pony you do it with, there’s… some kind of term for that, I’m sure.”
“Being official.”
Ish blinked. “That… sounds about right. I’m also aware that relationships here in Equestria are, well… Intimate, to say the least. Not just sexually, I’ve noticed that couples are almost always together, caring for each other no matter what happened to them.”
“Where are you even going with this?” Lyra cocked her head to the side.
“What I’m trying to say is…” Ish sighed. “I fucked up. We had sex a couple of times, and only one of them was consensual. So… I wanna start over. Y’know, like none of this ever happened.”
The two stood there awkwardly for what felt like minutes. Lyra wasn’t sure how to respond, the human who had been nothing but manipulative and mean had stood right in front of her, asking for a fresh start. If she had still obsessed over humans like she did a while ago, she would’ve agreed. But after she slowly realized that humans weren’t any special, nor any different than ponies, she wasn’t sure.
So what’s been stopping her from telling anyone about Ish’s abuse towards a pony’s relationship?
“And what if I say no?” She asked. “What if I go to Twilight and tell her to throw you in a prison for everything you did?”
Ish took a deep breath, and sighed. His head fell low, his eyes closing as he prepared for the worst. “I… wouldn’t blame you. After everything I’ve done to everyone besides you? I probably deserve it. I’ve lost my friends, my son… All because I didn’t take being in Equestria seriously. I just took everything as a joke and pissed everyone off.”
Lyra continued to stare at the defeated stallion before her, unsure of what to make her next move. She looked over to Twilight’s castle, reminding herself that it wasn’t very far from here, then looked back to Ish. She was left with a huge decision to make. Should she tell Twilight and have him sent to prison? Or should she give him the benefit of the doubt and see if he could pull through?
She knew she was gonna regret her choice.
Another moment of silence passed, leaving Ish to assume the worst.
“Ahem.”
Ish reluctantly looked up to the mint colored mare, expecting her to shut the door on his face, but instead received the opposite reaction.
“Hiya, I don’t believe we met.” She smiled warmly, extending a hoof. “I’m Lyra. What’s your name?”
Ish’s mouth opened agape slightly, not believing what was happening in front of him. He slowly, yet reluctantly lifted his hoof, grabbing hers and shaking it gently.
“My name’s Ishtaba.”

//-------------------------------------------------------//
                   Chapter 3.5-3: Dylan                    
//-------------------------------------------------------//
Chapter 3.5-3: Dylan
Shadow and Twilight sat on the couch watching TV while their foals napped. Shadow had been able to convince Twilight to buy a TV a while back, and while she didn’t think it wouldn’t be as enjoyable as reading books…
She had been proven wrong.
She still preferred reading books, but watching TV with her husband seemed just as entertaining.
“We’ll be right back after these messages!”
“Damn cliffhangers…” Shadow muttered under his breath. “Even in Equestria they’re abused to death… No wonder Jorge and Dash have a love-hate relationship with this show!”
“I didn’t think you’d be into these kind of shows, Shadow.” Twilight chuckled softly.
“Yeah well, Daring Do reminds me a lot of a certain movie from back home…” Shadow rolled his eyes. “They’re not the same, but kinda similar, in its own way.”
As the two of them talked, Dylan had walked past the couple, making his way towards the exit. The two of them interrupted their conversation, as they watched the brown-ish red unicorn on his way.
“Heading out, Dylan?” Shadow asked.
“Huh?” Dylan stopped in his tracks, raising an eyebrow as he looked back. “Oh. Yeah. Flutters had asked if I was free for the day, so I’m off to see what she has planned.”
Shadow blinked. “Uh, alright then. Have… fun?”
Dylan gave the canadian a curious glare, but then quickly shrugged it off as he continued on his path for the exit.
Shadow flopped back onto the couch, looking over to his wife. “Dylan’s been hanging out with Fluttershy a lot lately, hasn’t he?”
Twilight glanced over to where Dylan was, then back to Shadow. “You don’t think that he and Fluttershy…”
“What?” Shadow jerked his head back, then scoffed. “Please. Dylan’s only been here for a month, I’m more than sure he’s not seeing anypony, especially not Fluttershy.”
“It took you two weeks to go from having just arrived in Equestria, to making love to me.” Twilight deadpanned.
Shadow blinked. “...To be fair...Nah, I’m not gonna finish that sentence.”
Twilight raised an eyebrow, opening her mouth slightly to say something, only for the TV to interrupt her focus.
“We now return to Daring Do: The Series!”
“Ooh!”
“I hope you don’t mind if I bring Linda with me on our picnic…” Fluttershy said, walking with Dylan to a specific spot she had in mind for their picnic. “Jorge and Rainbow are working on renovating their room, so they asked if I could watch her for a few days.”
“No, that’s fine.” Dylan shook his head. “I don’t mind at all, besides, this was your idea anyway.”
“I know, but I was hoping it’d just be the two of us today.” Fluttershy admitted.
“Why’s that?”
“Well, I mean… I mainly wanted it to be a picnic for just the two of us.” Fluttershy explained. “Just two friends going for a picnic together, y’know?”
“And here I was thinking you had an ulterior motive.” Dylan snickered.
“Oh? And what kind of ulterior motive would I have for such a simple picnic?” Fluttershy raised an eyebrow.
“I haven't a single clue.” Dylan shrugged.
The rest of their walk had been silent, even Linda hadn’t barked, or made any other sound for that matter. Dylan had simply looked around, passing by familiar places he had seen once or twice during his time in Equestria, but never really thought much of it.
Eventually, the two made their way to their destination, on the outskirts of Ponyville, lied a single tree, isolated from any attention from the rest of the town.
“This place is pretty far out here, isn’t it?”
“I did say I wanted it to be just the two of us, didn’t I?” Fluttershy commented.
“I think you’ve more or less accomplished that.”
Fluttershy simply set her picnic basket down, pulling a checkerboard blanket from it.
“Need any help with that?” Dylan asked.
“That would be nice…”
Dylan nodded, grabbing the blanket with his magic, and perfectly setting it flat onto the ground.
The two sat down on the center of blanket, while Linda laid down on a corner, where no one could disturb her.
They grabbed their food from the basket, officially starting their picnic.
“...and he ended up as a cactus for a bit.” Dylan laughed softly. “You should’ve seen the look on his face. Well, y’know, after I gave him one…”
Fluttershy laughed along with him, while he had screwed up a spell and turned his friend into a cactus, the very fact that it was Ishtaba that got turned into a cactus made all concern almost non-existent.
“Was he ever turned into a pony like he wanted, though?” She asked, curious to see how Dylan’s story ended.
“Yeah, we had Twilight fix him up anyway.” Dylan nodded. “Then he showed up to Jorge’s and argued with him for a bit. I’m still not sure what they were arguing about entirely…”
“Do they still have Cryo? Or did Ish take him back?” Fluttershy cocked her head to the side.
“Naw, he’s still with Jorge last time I checked.” Dylan shook his head. “But last I heard from Ish, he was trying to get his life back together.”
“Do you think he actually will?”
“If he cares enough, he should be fine.”
Fluttershy nodded in response. “I hope so...”
“So do I.” Dylan agreed. “So, was there anything specific you wanted to talk about out here, or are we just enjoying each others company?”
“Oh, well, I… uh… Wanted to talk about you, actually.” Fluttershy shrugged.
“Oh… What about me, then?” Dylan raised an eyebrow.
“Well, you’ve been in Equestria for a month now… And I wanted to know what you thought about here so far.” Fluttershy explained. “Are you enjoying yourself here?”
“It’s definitely an improvement, that’s for sure.” Dylan affirmed. “As for enjoying myself, I think it’s the people and company I’ve had to thank for that... Some more than others.”
“That’s good.” Fluttershy smiled. “I’m glad you like it here so far…”
“Yeah, there’s always someone doing something around here.” Dylan looked out towards Ponyville. “I remember Jorge saying that everyone could quite literally do anything.”
“He’s not wrong.” Fluttershy agreed. “Out here, there’s ponies that do things from farming apples, to raising and lowering the sun and moon.” She looked up to the sky. “It’s all so magical…”
“I’ve had my fair share of magical already…” Dylan commented. “Well, was there anything else in particular you wanted to ask?”
“Um, well…” Fluttershy looked back at the stallion. “Is there anything you have planned to do here?”
“Well, as it seems I’m here for good, I figured that I would go about some sense of normality, you know?” Dylan shrugged. “Get a job, start living somewhere outside of the castle, possibly even find someone, uh, pony special to share it with…”
Fluttershy nodded, agreeing with him. “Um, you don’t have to answer this if you don’t want to… But… Is there anypony that caught your attention while you’ve been here?”
“Well… um… there is somepony t-that comes to mind…” Dylan stuttered.
“Oh! T-that’s good to hear!” Fluttershy grinned. “It sounds like you have it all figured out, huh?”
“I’d like to think so sometimes, though I’m not always too sure…” Dylan quietly spoke. “Besides, it’s not like I’ve gotten to know too many people, er, ponies so far.”
“I’m sure you’ll be fine.” Fluttershy reassured him. “After all, you have all of us to help you when you need it.”
“Yeah, but I think I prefer certain p-ponies help at this point…”
“Well, I can help you when you need some…” Fluttershy shrugged. “I don’t know if I’m one of those ‘certain’ ponies.”
“Uh, y-yeah, I’d say you are.” Dylan stuttered once more. “Is that all you had planned on asking?”
“Um… Y-yeah. That’s about it…” Fluttershy nodded.
“Well… um, in that case, what do y-you think about me being here?” Dylan asked.
“Huh?” Fluttershy blinked. “W-what do you mean?”
“W-well, you’ve been asking how I feel about being here, and even if I fancied somepony, but how do you feel about m-me being here?”
“O-oh…” Fluttershy uttered. “Well, I… um… I’m kinda surprised to see another human in Equestria. Jorge was a pretty nice person, Shadow and Ishtaba were two different extremes, but at least Shadow kinda mellowed down a bit when he started dating Twilight. And Ish...”
“Y-yeah Ish is Ish… but t-that makes everyone but me.” Dylan pointed out. “What do y-you think of me as...me, not as a human.”
Fluttershy looked away for a moment. “Um… Well, I-I think you’re pretty nice…” She looked back at Dylan her face having a slight red tint. “You’ve been so kind ever since we met… A-and, well…”
“W-well?” Dylan raised an eyebrow.
“I… I-I like you, Dylan…”
“O-oh…” Dylan said, slightly taken aback, blushing as well. “W-well… I l-like you too, Fluttershy…”
Fluttershy looked just as shocked as Dylan had, but quickly a happy look spread across her features.
“Fluttershy? Are you al—”
Dylan was cut short by Fluttershy, whom had tackled him in a loving embrace. She proceeded to kiss Dylan, who still failed to process what had just happened, but then slowly pushed back, returning the favor.
Linda woke up, being disturbed by the blankets shifting slightly as the two continued making out. She looked over to the two, recognizing their act of affection. She cocked her head to the side, looking around to see if anypony else had been watching. She looked back at the two, who still seemed focused on making out.
They didn’t look like they were gonna stop anytime soon, either.
“Thanks for walking me back home, Dylan…” Fluttershy smiled warmly. “I r-really enjoyed our little time together.”
“So d-did I.” Dylan returned the smile, looking around as the sun began to set. “Man, it sure is beautiful all the way out here.”
Fluttershy looked around as well, nodding in agreement. “It sure is…” She slowly walked over to her door, opening it softly as she prepared to return home, with Linda following suit. “W-well, t-thanks again…”
“No p-problem…” Dylan began “Y’know, while it is beautiful out h-here… It’s just not…”
“Just not… what?”
“It’s just not nearly as beautiful as y-you…”
Fluttershy’s face became noticeably pink, she turned her head slowly, attempting to hide her blush. “T-thank you…” She looked back inside her house. “W-Well… I should go check on Angel, poor thing’s probably worried about me.”
“A-alright, I’ll, uh, see you later, t-then.”
Fluttershy nodded, quickly, but gently closing the door as she leaned back against it. She sighed a breath of relief, her nerves getting the better of her. She looked down, noticing Angel standing right next to Linda, his arms crossed as he tapped his foot rapidly on the ground. While Linda simply gave her a curious stare, looking towards the window as Dylan began walking away, then looked back at Fluttershy.
“W-What?” She raised an eyebrow.
Angel kept his stance, though he raised his eyebrow knowingly.
Fluttershy looked out the window, seeing Dylan not too far away. “Y-Yeah, he’s a nice stallion, so?”
Linda rolled her eyes. Jumping on a small table near the window, then looked over to Dylan, then back at Fluttershy.
“Y-You want me to call him back?”
Angel jumped up to Linda’s side, using his arms to his advantage, pointing over to Dylan, then pointing downwards.
Fluttershy’s blush grew brighter. “A-Alright, if you two say so…”
Dylan slowly continued his path back to Twilight’s house, unable to stop thinking of today’s recent events.
“Dylan!”
His ear twitched at the sound of his name, he looked back, finding Fluttershy standing by her now open door. Despite being a few feet away, he could still see her smiling as she asked one last thing to him.
“W-would you like to come inside?”
“Twilight?” Shadow called out. “Has Dylan come back yet?”
“Not that I’m aware of, no.” Twilight called back.
“I thought maybe he teleported back home into his room, but I don’t see him.”
“He’s probably just out with Jorge or something...”
Shadow paused for a moment, recalling Dylan having being called by Fluttershy. “You don’t think that Dylan’s still with Fluttershy, do you?”
“The two of them? Alone? They’re both too timid for…”
Shadow blinked, realizing his wife had paused mid-sentence. “Are you thinking what I’m thinking?”
Twilight walked into the hallway. “You don’t actually think… That Dylan and Fluttershy are…”
Shadow’s eyes widened. “We need Jorge. Right now.”

//-------------------------------------------------------//
                   Chapter 3.5-4: Shadow                   
//-------------------------------------------------------//
Chapter 3.5-4: Shadow
“What?” Shadow jerked his head back, then scoffed. “Please. Dylan’s only been here for a month, I’m more than sure he’s not seeing anypony, especially not Fluttershy.”
“It took you two weeks to go from having just arrived in Equestria, to making love to me.” Twilight deadpanned.
Shadow blinked. “...To be fair...Nah, I’m not gonna finish that sentence.”
Twilight raised an eyebrow, opening her mouth slightly to say something, only for the TV to interrupt her focus.
“We now return to Daring Do: The Series!”
“Ooh!”
Shadow rolled his eyes at his wife’s near instant loss of attention towards him. He got up from the couch, looking off towards where Dylan stood. “I’mma go head out for a minute, I wanna ask Jorge something.”
“But you’re gonna miss the show!” Twilight reminded him.
“You can just fill me in when I get back!” Shadow replied. “I’m not gonna be gone for too long.”
“Alright…”
“So let me get this straight…” Jorge began. “You want me to go spy on Dylan simply because you think he’s been hanging out with Fluttershy too much?” He cocked his head to the side. “You do realize that’s an invasion of privacy, right?”
“Yeah, so?”
“Why don’t you do it?”
“Because… I have… Prince duties to attend to…” Shadow slowly replied. “Yeah, that’s it…”
Jorge stayed silent for a moment, waiting to see if Shadow would say anything else. “Alright, what’s the real reason?”
“...I don’t feel like it.” Shadow admitted.
Jorge deadpanned. “Fine. Whatever, I’ll do it, I guess…”
“I just want a status report on what they’re up to.” Shadow explained. “It’s not like I want you to watch them having sex or anything…”
“Yes, because I don’t already have enough of that over here with Rainbow.” Jorge rolled his eyes. “I just have to see what goes on in my friends’ sex life.”
“Jorge…?” Shadow tilted his head. “Your sarcasm’s showing.”
“Shadow, your stupidity’s showing.”
Shadow turned his head behind him, looking for something. “Is it? Because I can’t see it...”
Jorge shook his head. “Alright, feel free to stay here for as long as you’d like. I’mma go find Dylan.”
In an instant, Jorge had left his house, leaving Shadow to figure out what to do next. He looked over to the living room, noticing the TV was on. Raising an eyebrow, he walked over to the room, his focus immediately being drawn to the couch, where Cryo had been sitting.
Shadow looked over to the TV, recognizing the show that it was playing. “The Adventures of Batmare, eh?”
“You watch it too?” Cryo looked over to the canadian, whom had simply nodded.
“Sometimes.” He replied. “It’s not my favorite, but it’s pretty cool.”
“What’s your favorite show, then?” Cryo cocked his head to the side.
Shadow looked over to the nearby remote sitting on the table in front of the couch. “Mind if I change the channel?”
“Uh…” Cryo looked over to the TV, seeing that the show had gone on commercial break. “Okay… But change it back quick, the commercials are almost done!”
Shadow jumped onto the couch, grabbing the remove with a wing as he brought it over to his hooves, where he was able to press the correct number combination to get to the right channel.
“We now return to Daring Do: The Series!”
“Aw, c’monnnn…” Cryo whined. “Not you too…”
“What?” Shadow looked over to Cryo. “You don’t like this show?”
Cryo shook his head. “Uncle Jorgie and Auntie Rainbow watch this show a lot… I think it’s boring.”
“It’s not boring!” Shadow retorted. “It’s full of action, and adventure!”
“It’s boring.” Cryo crossed his hooves.
Before Shadow could retort, he heard a door creaking as it was opened, he looked over to the entrance to the house, realizing it wasn’t Jorge. Once he had heard the soft click of the door being closed, he narrowed it down to the only other option.
“Jorge?” Dash called out, the sound of her hoofsteps drawing closer. “That better not be a new episode of the spinoff!”
Once she had entered the room, she noticed the very surprising lack of the cuban, as well as the canadian that took his place.
At the same time, Shadow had also noticed the mare carrying her foals on her back, her wings extended to keep them secure and prevent them from falling. They seemed to be enjoying the ride their mother had been giving them.
“Oh, hey Shadow.” Dash said, raising an eyebrow. “Have you seen Jorge?”
“Err… He went to go spy on Dylan for me.” Shadow bluntly replied.
“Okay… Why?”
“Uh, well, Dylan’s been leaving the castle pretty often…” Shadow explained. “And almost every time he’s left, it’s been because either Fluttershy’s called him over, or just ‘cause he wanted to visit her personally.”
“So?” Dash asked. “What’s that gotta do with anything?”
“I’m just curious of what they’re doing, that’s all.” Shadow shrugged, looking over to the foals. “Looks like they’re having fun.” He chided.
Dash turned her head to see the foals on her back. “Yeah… Prism and Spectrum love piggyback rides. And naps…”
“Sounds like they take after their mom.” Shadow joked, unaware of Cryo stealing the remote from his grasp to change the channel back.
“Hey!” Dash retorted. “I love naps as much as the next pony… But these two practically live off of naps!”
Shadow got up from the couch, realizing Cryo had stolen the remote. “I’m sure it’s fine. If anything, it should be easier to take care of them since all they do is nap, right?”
“You’d think that.” Dash shook her head. “They almost never sleep when it’s time to, they’re always so full of energy because of those naps, that it makes it impossible for any of us to sleep since they’re constantly wanting attention.”
“Is that why you’re out here now?”
“Duh.” Dash spoke. “If I can keep them awake all day until it’s bedtime, then they’ll be too tired to stay up all night.”
“Sounds like a plan.” Shadow commented. “Welp, since Cryo decided to steal the remote from me, I’mma head back home and watch TV.”
Dash looked over to Cryo, then over to the TV. “Yeah… Cryo doesn’t like watching anything that isn’t a cartoon.”
“But…” Shadow uttered. “Nevermind…” He simply just shook his head, and began walking over to the door to the outside.
“Hey.”
Shadow stopped in his tracks, looking back to Dash, whom had given him a curious look.
“Why didn’t you go and spy on Dylan, anyway?”
“I have prince duties to attend to.” Shadow replied. “I don’t have time to keep an eye on Dylan.”
“...So you just didn’t feel li—”
“Yeah I didn’t feel like it, shuddap.” Shadow huffed. “Besides, Jorge is sneakier than me, I figured he would fit the job nicely.”
“I don’t see what the problem is with Dylan hanging out with Flutters, though…” Dash gave her two cents. “I mean… They’re both too… what’s the word…”
“Shy?”
“No, not that one…” Dash shook her head, placing a hoof on her chin to help her think. “There was another word…”
“Timid?”
“Yeah, that.” Dash nodded, removing her hoof from her chin. “They’re both too timid to do anything. I mean, it’s not like they’re both gonna start having sex all of a sudden.”
“Well, I mean, it took about four months for you and Jorge to start banging…” Shadow shrugged.
“And it took you two weeks for you and Twilight to start banging.” Dash countered. “Your point?”
“My point being…” Shadow ignored Dash’s counter. “How long do you think it’s take for Dylan to get some?”
Dash deadpanned. “You can’t be serious…”
“I’m just saying…” Shadow shrugged. “It may have taken me two weeks to actually become official with Twilight, but it only took Ishtaba a week to wind up in bed with Lyra.” He smirked at his instant win, remembering Ish had gone to work the fastest. “Who knows? Maybe today’s Dylan and Fluttershy’s lucky day.”
“Shadow, you’re talking about the mare who I’ve known since we were fillies back in Cloudsdale.” Dash rolled her eyes. “She’s too shy to make a move on anypony, let alone have sex with somepony so quickly.”
“If you say so, Dash…” Shadow opened the door. “But let’s just say that they do wind up in bed together? What then?”
“Depends on the stallion.” Dash replied. “I know it’s not going to be him, but if it is Dylan, I could see it work out. He seems like a pretty nice stallion.”
Shadow nodded. “I suppose.” He slowly began walking out the door. “I just have this feeling that something’s gonna happen with those two.” He poked his head back inside the house, reaching for the doorknob. “I’m calling it now, Dash. Just you wait.”
And with that, the door had closed.
“Hm, Dylan and Fluttershy, eh?” Dash thought aloud to herself. “I wonder how that’ll turn out…”
Shadow looked around Ponyville as he walked back to the castle. Passing by Sugarcube Corner, his stomach growled angrily at the sight of the sugary themed house. He paused for a moment, looking at his path back home, then back at the shop. His stomach growled once more, leaving him with a choice to make.
“I could go for a smoothie right about now…”
He walked inside the store, walking through the non-existent line.
“Hiya, Shadie!” Pinkie beamed. “What can I get for ya?”
“Uh… a strawberry banana smoothie, please.”
“Coming right up!” Pinkie zipped off to the kitchen, returning merely seconds later with his requested smoothie. “Here ya go!”
Shadow blinked. “That was fast…”
“Well, you see, I knew you would be here, my Pinkie Sense told me!” Pinkie explained. “So I had your smoothie all nice and ready for you when you came!”
Shadow paused, having forgotten about her ‘Pinkie Sense’. “Right…” Having lost interest in caring, he focused back on his smoothie. “Welp! Thanks Pinkie!”
“No problem!”
Shadow grabbed his smoothie, placing the appropriate bits on the counter, and walked off towards one of the tables. While the place hadn’t been packed full of ponies, there had been quite a few here and there that had been occupying his normal tables of choice. As he began scanning through tables to find one that would allow him to simply hide in a corner, he eventually noticed a familiar panda looking stallion, eating a slice a cake along with a smoothie of his own.
Curious, Shadow walked over to the stallion’s table, occupying the seat across from his.
“Sup Shadow?” Ish raised an eyebrow, noticing the smoothie in the canadian’s hooves. “Man, these smoothies are amazing, aren’t they?”
“Yeah, they’re pretty great…” Shadow nodded. “What brings you here, Ish?”
“What, can’t a guy eat some food just because he’s hungry?”
“No, I mean… You rarely go to restaurants like this and pay for your own food.” Shadow shrugged. “At least, for the two years you’ve been here in Equestria, anyway.”
“Oh, you mean ‘how did I pay for this’?”
“Erm, that’s one way of putting it.”
“Ah.” Ish nodded. “Yeah… Lyra gave me a few bits so I could go eat something. She said I look like I haven’t eaten in weeks.”
“...Have you?”
“Somewhat.” Ish replied. “Since Cryo kept spending the weekends with Jorge, feeding him wasn’t an issue. I mostly just ate whatever my neighbors gave me every now and then.”
“Hold on a second…” Shadow spoke, realizing something. “Did you say Lyra gave you some bits?”
“Oh yeah, I guess I haven’t told anyone yet…” Ish thought aloud. “I asked Lyra for a second try, a fresh start, that kind of thing.”
“And she said yes?”
“Surprisingly, yeah… She offered to help me find a job that’d fit with my talents.”
“Talents?”
“I dunno, I used to be able to make you guys laugh back home.” Ish shrugged. “And I’m good at a few other things. So we’re mostly just looking around to see what fits.”
“Sounds like you’re actually pulling yourself together, Ish.” Shadow took a sip of his smoothie. “I’m proud of you. It must’ve taken a lot for you to do this.”
“Yeah, well, you can thank Jorge for a part of that.”
“Oh?”
“Yeah, I ended up talking to him, and it ended up turning into an argument, even Dylan kinda stepped in.” Ish explained. “Things were said, counters were thrown… Let’s just say that Jorge said some things that actually got to me.”
“He tends to do that.” Shadow took another sip of his smoothie. “One minute, he’ll be full retard mode, the next minute, something’s turned around completely to work in his favor.”
Ish nodded, taking a bite out of his cake. “Jorge knows a lot about this world, doesn’t he?”
“Not as much as you’d think.” Shadow shook his head. “He’s been telling me that a lot of things have been different than what he saw in the show this world’s supposedly based on, and other things he hadn’t even known about.”
“Really?” Ish cocked his head to the side. “Like what?”
“Well, for one, it took him almost four months to find out what being official means here in Equestria.” Shadow explained. “And according to him, things that were supposed to happen according to the show haven’t happened at all here. He blames the fact that us being here changed some events, but I think there’s something more to it.”
“How so?”
“Well, from what I’ve noticed, only a handful of things that were ‘supposed’ to happen actually happened. Tirek, for example.” Shadow began. “And while we don’t know for certain, Jorge believes that all the stuff that happened in the show prior to him showing up have actually happened. Although we have no proof to help with his theory.”
“Why not just ask the girls if X happened or if Y happened?” Ish asked logically. “If X happened, but Y didn’t, then you’d clearly be able to find something to backup that theory, right?”
“Jorge wants to leave asking the girls as a last resort.” Shadow shook his head. “Something about not wanting to pry into their personal life from before we showed up. Besides, reminding Twilight that back home we used to consider this world as simply a children’s cartoon? Not the greatest of ideas…”
“Right…” Ish nodded. “Makes enough sense, I guess. So then where are you going with this?”
“My guess is that certain events are just coincidentally playing out like in the show, and others either haven’t happened at all, or won’t happen in the future.”
“Have you found anything to back up that guess?”
“Nope.” Shadow bluntly stated. “I have to ask Jorge about some events that ‘happened’ in earlier episodes before I can do any actual investigating of my own.”
“Ah.” Ish took the final bite of his cake, moving over to finish the rest of his smoothie. “Well, get back to me on that theory of yours, I’m actually curious to see how this plays out.”
“Will do.” Shadow nodded, realizing the contents of his cup was now empty. “Alright, guess it’s time for me to head home. “It was nice talking to you, Ish. Y’know, actually talking.”
“Same!” Ish smiled. “It’s been awhile since we’ve actually hung out. You... think we could do this more often?”
Shadow raised an eyebrow. Ish seemed genuinely set on putting his life on a better track, and reconnecting with his friends. He smiled softly at the thought of Ish actually becoming bearable to be around with again. “Yeah… Yeah, definitely.”
Ish’s smile simply grew brighter at the canadian’s response.
https://camo.derpicdn.net/42e5f7cee3f694b2f0b7b2c2dd4f17cbd42bfe0f?url=https%3A%2F%2Flh6.googleusercontent.com%2FmlKzxXSkSNfzB89HZWd3eDunY2-YfLkTHANwI0qnPBNgypv1QATxbTOkb4GCismzTvqtbSzGIecG9KtRW-vgih7ulpdxrmfZM15vc6zuE1eiq1aCfNEomgQ8SR8mekRvUA
“Great!”
Shadow opened the door to his castle, walking inside as he called out to his wife. “Twilight! I’m home!”
With an audible click of the door, he continued walking ahead, looking over to where he originally had left Twilight, seeing the TV was off, he figured the marathon was over. Curious of Dylan’s whereabouts, he decided to make a turn over to the hall that lead to Dylan’s room. He knocked on the door gently, calling out his name in an attempt to get his attention. However, that failed, leaving him to assume either Dylan was asleep, or not there at all.
Wanting to figure out which of the two it was, Shadow opened the door softly, peeking his head through to see if Dylan was asleep. Upon finding the unicorn to be nowhere in bed, Shadow entered the room completely, looking around in an attempt to find his friend. His closet, under the bed, he checked multiple places that Dylan had normally hidden in, only to come to a single conclusion.
He walked out of Dylan’s room, looking out the hallway to see if his wife was nearby.
“Twilight?” Shadow called out. “Has Dylan come back yet?”
“Not that I’m aware of, no.” Twilight called back.
“I thought maybe he teleported back home into his room, but I don’t see him.”
“He’s probably just out with Jorge or something...”
Shadow paused for a moment, recalling Dylan having being called by Fluttershy. “You don’t think that Dylan’s still with Fluttershy, do you?”
“The two of them? Alone? They’re both too timid for…”
Shadow blinked, realizing his wife had paused mid-sentence. “Are you thinking what I’m thinking?”
Twilight walked into the hallway. “You don’t actually think… That Dylan and Fluttershy are…”
Shadow’s eyes widened. “We need Jorge. Right now.”
“I can indeed confirm that Dylan and Fluttershy have boarded the express way to pound-town.”
Shadow’s mouth fell open. “Seriously!?”
Jorge nodded. “It took a while, but last I saw, Dylan got invited into Fluttershy’s place. And there was some massive sexual tension going on between them.”
“Did you see anything else besides that?”
“They made out.” Jorge bluntly stated. “Does that work for your curious mind, Shadow?”
“Err, yeah, that works.” Shadow nodded, disregarding his comment. “Were you caught? Like, at all?”
“Well, Linda almost noticed me at one point.” Jorge replied. “I guess she could tell someone was there.”
“Damn though…” Shadow thought aloud. “I mean, yeah, I called it. But holy shit… Go Dylan…”
“Well, I didn’t see them head to the bedroom.” Jorge added. “Fluttershy invited him in, he went in. About five minutes later, I… uh… I heard things that I shouldn’t have been hearing.” He looked away, trying to disregard the sounds he heard earlier.
Shadow blinked. “Uh… Sorry to put you through all that trouble, Jorge.”
“Oh, it wasn’t much trouble.” Jorge admitted. “Sure, Linda made things a little tricky, but the only thing I’m gonna need brain bleach for is cause of the stuff I heard.”
“Well, thanks, Jorge.” Shadow smiled softly. “Glad to see that Dylan’s found something to occupy himself with.”
Jorge simply rolled his eyes. “No problem. Just… next time you need me to spy on anything, think about what it is you’re having me spy on, alright?”
“I’ll try.” Shadow chuckled. “Though I can’t promise you anything.”
“No, I suppose not.” Jorge shook his head as he chuckled along with his friend. “Well, I’mma head back home. Dash is probably wondering what’s going on.”
“Alright, see ya later Jorge.”
The cuban nodded in response, walking off into the distance, until he was out of Shadow’s view, it wasn’t until he heard the door closing when he found his friend to leave the castle entirely.
Shadow walked over to Twilight, who had been sitting on the couch, watching TV once again. He looked over to the TV, finding his favorite show to still be running. “This is a marathon, isn’t it?”
“Yep!” Twilight nodded. “They’re running a marathon for all the episodes of the original Daring Do series, because they’re going to do a crossover with the spinoff, and the original! Isn’t that exciting?!”
“Yeah, it sounds like they’re going all out for this one.” Shadow nodded. “So then I haven’t really missed much, have I?”
“Not really.” Twilight shook her head. “Most of the other episodes that played we saw already.”
“Ah.”
“So, what did your ‘spy’ say about Dylan and Fluttershy?”
“Let’s just say we might need to buy them some bleach…”
“Really?” Twilight jerked her head back. “They’re actually…!?”
“According to Jorge, yeah.” Shadow confirmed. “According to the scars on his brain? Yeah.”
Twilight blinked. “W-Wow… I never thought that Fluttershy… of all ponies…”
“Neither did I, to be honest.” Shadow shrugged. “But, hey, what’re you gonna do? They’re both adults, they can take care of themselves.”
“I suppose…” Twilight agreed, grabbing the remote, and turning down the TV’s volume. “So, I heard you spoke with Ishtaba at Sugarcube Corner while you were out?”
“Pinkie told you?”
“When it comes to Pinkie, news gets out real quick.” Twilight chuckled. “What did you guys talk about?”
“Well, he’s still working on getting his life back on track.”
“He is?”
“Yeah. Believe it or not, but he also asked Lyra for a fresh start, and she’s been helping him find a job.” Shadow replied. “Then we started talking about some other things, just a friendly conversation.”
“Wait, Lyra’s actually helping him now?” Twilight’s eyebrow raised. “Do you think he’ll actually pull through? I mean… this is Ishtaba we’re talking about.”
“To be honest… Yeah, actually. I think he actually realized how much of a dick he was.” Shadow began. “Like, before I left the shop, he even asked if we could hang out more often.”
“What’d you say?”
“I said yeah, it was nice to actually talk with him, for once.” Shadow explained. “If he keeps going the way he’s going, I don’t mind.”
Twilight smiled at Shadow’s statement. “You really care for your friends, don’t you Shadow?”
Shadow nodded. “I give them a lot of crap, but I really do care for them.” He smiled softly. “They may be a bunch of goofballs, but I’m glad to have them as friends.”
Before Shadow could utter another word, he was interrupted by his wife hugging him from the side. “You’re a good friend, Shadow. You know that?”
“So I’ve been told.” Shadow jokingly said.
“Seriously though.” Twilight lightly tapped his head with a hoof. “At first I wondered why you all considered each other friends, but… Now I see why. And I’m glad they all have you as a friend.” She sighed softly. “I don’t know what they’d do without you…”
Shadow looked off to a nearby window, able to see Ish walking somewhere in the distance.
“Yeah… I guess you’re right.”
Author's Note
Special thanks to Speed-Chaser (http://speed-chaser.deviantart.com/) for doing this art. I wasn't even planning on having this until he randomly showed up in one of Daszkin's (https://www.fimfiction.net/user/Daszkin) (he's also gr8 pls check him out too) streams offering one request. So big thanks to him once again for doing this!
In other news, this is the end of "Arc 3.5"
Why was it called Arc 3.5?
Well, instead of explaining everything here in the author's note, I've posted a blog right before I uploaded the chapter, which you can find here (https://www.fimfiction.net/blog/687178/hilie-arc-35-is-complete-so-what-now).
See ya there.

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            Chapter 1-1: The Start of a New Day            
//-------------------------------------------------------//
Chapter 1-1: The Start of a New Day
It was a bright and sunny day in Ponyville. The wind howled through the near perfect trees, never blowing a single leaf off. The weather ponies made sure to clear all the clouds away from this particular day, leaving the blue sky clear from any interruptions from Celestia’s sun. The inhabitants of this beautiful town are simply enjoying their day, either working, learning, or just living life.
“Shut up, Linda!” A loud voice shouted, followed by the shrill sounds of a barking dog.
But of course, the same couldn’t be said for one particular resident of this peaceful town.
“It’s been a whole friggin week since I brought you to this world, and you still won’t stop barking at the ponies!” The dog looked up to the sound of the voice, recognizing a familiar human, she slowly quiets down, sits down, and wags her tail.
“Seriously…” Godson looked out his window, then back to his dog. “What am I gonna do with you…?”
Linda tilted her head in confusion, still wagging her tail as she waited for her owner to give her attention.
Godson gave a soft chuckle, grabbing his dog, and carried her in his arms, allowing her to lay back as he securely held her like a baby. He walked back to his room, gently placing her down on the bed. He lifted the blankets just a little bit, and she ran under them, curling up like a little ball as she found a comfortable spot right smack dab in the middle of the bed.
“And now I gotta go to work…” He thought aloud, exiting his room, leaving her to sleep alone in his bed. As he got closer to the door leading to the outside world, he grabbed his phone from a desk near the exit, despite not receiving calls or having internet, he still never knew when he’d need to take a picture.
As he exited his own house, locking the door behind him. He thought about the past few weeks ever since that day. More specifically, the time he brought his dog into this world. He smiled at the thought, knowing his companion wouldn’t be alone without him anymore.
One Week Ago...
Twilight hummed softly as she was organizing her books, specifically, in alphabetical order. She hoped that this new method of sorting would be more helpful whenever she needed a book.
Luckily for her, she had magic to do all of the work, as all of her books slowly levitated to their new proper places. She smiled softly as her new sorting system began to fall into place, book by book, piece by piece. She picked the perfect time to do this, too. Pinkie was still working over at Sugarcube Corner, Applejack had some more apples to buck, Fluttershy was nursing a baby bird back to health, Rainbow Dash was working on this week’s weather schedule, and Rarity simply had several orders to fill.
Basically, all her friends were too busy to interrupt her.
“Ahh…” Twilight sighed of relief. “For once it feels nice to have silence around here… Even Spike’s up in the bedroom taking a nap.”
Despite all the talking to herself, she enjoyed being away from everything, no attention, no friends, just her and whatever she felt like doing.
But, suddenly, the door slammed wide open with a loud thump, catching the alicorn off guard. She yelped in fear, completely cancelling out her spell, all the levitated books now fell on the floor, some even landing on her, while the others remained on the bookshelf.
“TWILIIIIIIIIGHT!” A male voice shouted. “I JUST HAD THE GREATEST IDEA!”
And it was there that she remembered that she took account for all of her friends, except for one.
Godson.
Twilight rubbed her temples softly, as she tried to avoid catching a magically induced headache by that sudden cancellation. She winced in pain slightly, but then shook it off, and looked at her human friend.
“Hey there, Godson…” She spoke softly. “Wasn’t expecting to see you here…”
“Yeah, well, I wasn’t either.” Godson stated bluntly. “But then I thought about something, and came up with a great idea.”
“Yeah?” Twilight raised an eyebrow. “And what’s that?”
“Linda.”
“...What?” Twilight tilted her head.
“My dog.” Godson blinked. “Have I never mentioned her before?”
“No…?” Twilight replied, completely unsure of the subject.
“Oh.” Godson uttered. “Well, uh, yeah. I have a dog.”
“And?”
“Well, remember that spell you used to bring me here?” Godson queried, pausing for a moment as he received a nod from Twilight. “Right, well, my dog kinda… noticed it, I guess.”
“Wait a sec.” Twilight interrupted. “That was your dog?”
“Yeah.” Godson nodded, raising his eyebrow softly. “What did you think she was?”
“Uh… Nothing.” Twilight’s muzzle scrunched as she tried to dodge the question.
Godson immediately caught notice of this, his expression fading into a blank state. “Twilight…?” His voice raised in pitch. “What did you think she was…?”
Twilight remained silent, hoping he’d change the subject if she waited long enough. She kept looking at him as he continued his blank stare, eventually, she knew she was going nowhere.
“Uh…” She uttered. “A big rat, or something…”
Godson paused for a moment, taking in Twilight’s words. He took a deep breath, and sighed deeply. “I kinda expected as such, her being a chihuahua and all.” Before Twilight could ask, he quickly interrupted her. “A breed of dog. Please tell me you have different breeds of dogs…”
Twilight simply nodded in response, hearing a sigh of relief from the human. “Alright, so, what about your dog, then?”
“Well, I figured she must be pretty lonely without me…” Godson scratched the back of his head. “I mean, I know my family’s probably taking care of her and all… But I’d feel better if she were here with me.”
“Uh, alright.” Twilight nodded at the human’s odd request. “Yeah, sure, I could do it.”
“Cool!” Godson cheered. “So uh… when are you gonna do it?”
“Seriously?” Twilight deadpanned, looking at all the books scattered on the floor around her, then back at Godson.
“...Right, so… Not right now, then…” Godson smiled sheepishly. “I’ll just… uh, be back… later?”
“Good idea…”
“Right, so.” Twilight began, “I can’t guarantee I can get the spell working again, it took me quite a few tries just to get you here, Godson.”
“So what you’re saying is…”
“If I get this to work again…” Her horn illuminated in a purple glow. “You’re one lucky human.”
Godson caught notice of a familiar rainbow-maned pegasus sitting next to him. Knowing she wasn’t here earlier, he quickly covered her mouth before she could ask what was going on.
“What are you doing here?” He whispered.
“Well, you told me about some spell Twilight was doing for you, so I figured I’d come and tag along.” She replied with an “innocent” smile.
Godson simply shrugged. Watching as Twilight did her thing.
Soon, the room began to illuminate in a bright purple glow as Twilight tried to focus her magic on decently powerful spell. Every now and then she’s groan as she kept her magic stable, as one little mistake could cause quite a lot of damage, she wasn’t exactly sure to what, but she didn’t exactly want to find out.
In an instant, Twilight’s horn sparked, and her glowing aura immediately dimmed. Godson wasn’t exactly sure what was going on, but Dash seemed to recognize this moment.
“Hey… That’s the spell she used to bring you here.” Dash commented. “What exactly did you ask her to do, Godson?”
“You’ll see…” Godson replied. “I hope.”
Suddenly, from where they were sitting, it looked as if a hole was punched in the air, the hole grew more and more, slowly forming a decently sized circle. All they could see was total darkness through the hole, but soon, they started to see something, an image forming, as first it was just blobs of color, then it slowly became a blurry image, until they could see clear as day what it was.
His home.
Godson tried to get a good look through the hole, not finding a whole lot being changed, he was only using this portal just to get to his dog, anyway.
“It’s not like you can go back, you even said you didn’t want to, right?” Dash asked.
“That’s not why I asked Twilight to open the portal…” He tried placing his hand through the portal, but found himself unable to, as if it was some sort of wall blocking him. “Right, so it’s still one way…” He placed a thinking hand on his chin. “But I wonder if it’s soundproof or not…”
“What’s that got to do with anything?” Dash cocked her head to the side.
Godson looked at Twilight, who appeared to be in some pain. “Was she like this when I got here?”
“Little bit, yeah.” Dash nodded.
“Then I’ll probably want to hurry up…” Godson thought aloud, knocking on the invisible wall, hearing no sound at all from doing so.
“C’mon, Linda… find the portal already…” He muttered to himself.
Surely enough, the portal caught the attention of a certain white chihuahua, with two large brown spots on the sides of her head. One spot covered the area around her left eye, and covered her entire left ear, as well a little extra around the two areas, creating one big circle on her left side. Another spot, while smaller than the first one, covered the right side of her face, covering from behind her right ear to just a few centimeters next to her right eye.
“Gah! The heck is that!?” Dash pointed at the small dog.
“My dog.” Godson stated flatly.
“That’s a dog?” Dash asked, shocked by the answer she was given. “That looks more like a rat!”
Feeling the presence of the portal again, Linda immediately barked at the air in front of her, spooking both Godson and Rainbow Dash, while Twilight still remained focused on her spell.
Godson placed his hand on the invisible wall once more, confirming there was no way to pull her in unless she stepped through the portal—even if just a little bit—voluntarily. Linda continued barking, not being able to see what she was actually barking at, but she knew it didn’t feel very safe.
“Linda!” Godson shouted. “Quit barking like an idiot and get over here!”
Instantly, Linda stopped barking, her ears pointed up high to the sky, recognizing the voice. She began wagging her tail, her tongue sticking out just a little bit as she calmed down.
“Huh.” Godson uttered. “Guess it’s not sound-proof after all…”
Linda tilted her head to the side as she tried to step a little closer to the portal, she sniffed it slightly, though had no reaction to the air she inhaled.
“Just jump, for crying out loud!” Godson yelled into the portal, hoping she’d understand what he was saying.
Linda heard the voice, but was unsure what to do. She would step closer to the portal, and then back away, only to repeat the process. After a couple of times, she bolted straight for the portal, jumping right before she made contact.
“Oshi—” Godson suddenly found himself lying on the ground, his dog happily licking his face, causing him to laugh uncontrollably. “Alright, alright! Quit it!” He spoke through his fit of laughter. “Twilight, you can close the portal already!”
Twilight’s ear twitched at the mention of her name, she took that as a signal to stop, as her horn’s glow quickly faded to nothing, as well as the portal closing in on itself.
“Whew…” Twilight panted. “That was… quite tiring…”
“Wait… That was it?” Dash went wide-eyed. “You had Twilight go through all this trouble… Just to get your dog back!?”
“Pretty much.” Godson bluntly replied, getting up from the ground. “She’d go nuts without me.” He grabbed her, then moved her around so he’d be holding her like he would hold a baby. “Isn’t she adorable, though?”
Dash looked at the dog held in his arms, scanning every part of her, she wasn’t exactly sure to think, but then the dog reached forward slightly to lick her nose.
“H-Hey!” Dash jerked her head back, placing a hoof on her now wet nose. She looked back at the dog, and smiled softly. “...T-That was kinda cute…”
“Alright.” Twilight interrupted. “Lemme see, too.” She rubbed her head, trying to clear away her massive headache, a side-effect from keeping the portal open for so long. She walked up to the dog, analysing the dog’s behaviour, which seemed normal. Her horn illuminated once more, literally scanning the dog for any anomalies from jumping through the portal. That, too, returned with normal results.
She reached a hoof to Linda’s head, trying to pet her, only for her to retaliate and bark, spooking the alicorn mare, her hoof speedily retracting back to her body.
Linda continued her series of yapping and barking, never ending as long as she saw Twilight. Then, she was silenced as her owner softly tapped her head, scolding her.
“Watch it, Linda.” Godson said, stifling a chortle. “She’s the reason why you’re here.”
“What kind of name is ‘Linda’ anyway?” Dash raised an eyebrow.
“It’s Spanish.” Godson rolled his eyes, knowing he’d get another question from Twilight, he looked at her with a deadpan expression. “Let me answer your upcoming question with another question: Does Equestria have different languages?”
Twilight simply nodded.
“Huh. I wasn’t actually sure if you guys did or not.” Godson shrugged. “Anyway, yeah, we have them too. Spanish is one of them.”
“So… what does ‘Linda’ mean?”
“Pretty.” Godson smiled.
“Well, you’re not wrong.” Twilight looked at the dog. “She’s kinda pretty.”
“She’s usually nicer than this, I’m not exactly sure why she snapped at you like that…” Godson looked at the dog as well. “Or, more importantly, why she snapped at you, but not Rainbow Dash?” He looked at the pegasus mare.
“I guess she just likes me?” Dash shrugged, only for the human to shrug back.
“Here, Twilight, try petting her again.” Godson brought Linda closer to her.
“Uh… Alright…” Twilight slowly brought her hoof closer to Linda’s head once more, only for her to begin to retaliate with a growl, only for Godson to scold her with a soft tap, shutting her up. She got closer and closer, until her hoof finally came into contact with her head. In an instant, the dog calmed down, registering Twilight as a non-threat. Her ears folded back, and her tongue poked out just a little bit as she enjoy the little bit of attention she got from the strange creature.
“There, see? No big deal.” Godson said to the dog. “She’s not gonna hurt you…”
Then, Godson thought of something. “Y’know, it surprises me that she’s suddenly okay with you two petting her, being ponies and all.”
“Why’s that?”
“I dunno… I mean, if I were a dog, I’d be even a little freaked out to be around two ponies that are giant compared to me.” Godson commented. “But Linda seems perfectly fine with it.”
“Well, besides that, you’re lucky I was able to pull this off.” Twilight pointed out.
“Yeah.” Godson nodded. “Thanks, Twilight. I owe you one.”
“Oh, no need.” Twilight shook her head. “Consider this as an… apology, for having you stuck here.”
Godson’s expression changed from being normally happy, to an expression of surprise.
“Uh… Thanks.” Godson said blankly. “Even though you didn’t really need to apologize… I was already fine having to live here in Equestria…”
“Yeah, well, I still feel bad about the whole thing.” Twilight’s smile faded into a soft frown.
“Alright, let’s not turn this into a sap-fest, guys.” Dash interrupted. “Everything all worked out in the end, right?”
Both the human and the alicorn nodded.
“Then don’t try to make a big deal about it.”
Godson looked at Twilight, then back at Dash. “Right.” He cleared his throat. “Well, thanks anyways, Twilight.” He placed the dog down on the floor. “I really appreciate it.”
“No problem.” Twilight’s smile formed again. “I’m glad I was able to help you. Let’s… just agree on not using the portal again, alright?”
“Deal.” Godson nodded in agreement. “Alright, I guess I’mma head out. See ya guys.” He made a gesture with his hand, signalling Linda to follow, and she obeyed, following him out the door.
Once they exited the library, Linda began to bark and yap loudly at the rest of the town. She even went as far as running off to chase somepony.
“Hey! Linda! Get back here!”
“Goddy!”
“Huh?” Godson snapped out of his flashback, finding himself behind the register of Sugarcube Corner; his workplace. There was a large line of ponies waiting to take their order, some impatient, some angry over the human’s random daze, and others just not caring entirely.
He looked behind him, only to see his boss, Pinkie Pie, standing right behind him.
“What’s all the hold up for?” Pinkie asked. “You’ve been standing there doing nothing for the past fifteen minutes!”
Godson went wide-eyed. “I have?” He looked back at the long line of ponies, then back at Pinkie. “When the heck did I even get here?”
“About… Seventeen minutes ago?” Pinkie looked at the clock to verify. “Yeah, seventeen minutes ago.”
“Figures…” Godson thought out loud. “I’m surprised everyone waited fifteen minutes just to take their order…”
“They didn’t…” Pinkie countered. “I’ve been doing your job for the past fifteen minutes!”
“Why the heck didn’t you just snap me out of it!?”
“I tried!” Pinkie grumbled. “Nothing worked. I was almost about to bring out the party cannon and see if that would work!”
Godson went wide-eyed, simply thinking about how badly that situation would be was enough to worry him. “Y-Yeah, I’m glad I’m out of it now…” He quickly shook his head as a thought quickly surfaced. “Wait, if you’ve been doing my job for the past fifteen minutes… Then what’s with the huge line?”
“Everypony’s on break!” Pinkie stated. “Do you know how hard it is to maintain the register and bake all these cakes at this time!?”
“What about Mr. and Mrs. Cake?” Godson asked.
“They’re taking care of their foals, duh!”
“Of course…”
“Now, let’s hurry up! We got customers to feed!”
As the bakery slowly began to empty from all it’s satisfied customers, the slow hours started rolling by. Everypony went back to work, all the colts and fillies were at school, and while a few customers would come by, it was slow enough for the two workers to sit at one of the tables and relax.
Godson sighed a breath of relief. “Finally, we get a break.”
“Well, you get a break, anyway.” Pinkie said with a giggle. “I’m still bursting with energy!” She immediately took the slow hour to her advantage, bouncing off to the kitchen.
“Wish I had that kind of energy…” Godson spoke to no-one in particular.
Suddenly, sounds of a ringing bell came from behind. Godson recognized the sound, being the small bell attached to the door. It’s purpose was to ring a little whenever the door was opened. He looked behind him to see who came through the door, nearly getting ready for work once more, but then went back to relaxing when he noticed it was simply just Rainbow Dash.
“Heyooo!” Dash cheered. “Quiet hour, huh?”
“Just a bit.” Godson answered with a chuckle. “So what are you doin’ here, Dash?”
“Well, I’m here to pick up my order…” Dash giggled softly. “And also to check to see if we were still up for movie night, tonight?”
“‘Course we are.” Godson nodded. “I don’t plan on backing out anytime soon.”
“‘Kay, just wanted to make sure, that’s all.” Dash smiled, turning her focus over to Pinkie. “Yo, Pinkie! I’m here for my order!”
“Just a second~!”
“That reminds me, actually.” Godson said. “If Equestria has movies and television… Then why’d you have to make me explain what it was?”
“We didn’t.” Dash giggled. “You just flatout explained what it was without us asking.”
“Did I?” Godson tilted his head to the side. “Huh…”
“Anyway.” Dash cleared her throat, grabbing a large box that Pinkie placed on top of the counter. “We’re doin’ this at your place, right?”
“I don’t exactly have any wings.” Godson looked to his back to verify, then back at Dash. “So yeah, we’re doin this at my place.”
“You could always have Twilight cast a cloudwalking spell on you.” Dash pointed out.
“Eh. Too much work.” Godson shook his head.
“Alright. Your place it is, then.” Dash replied, winking at him as she began to walk away. “See ya then!” She shouted, exiting the bakery.
“‘Kay!” Godson shouted back.
And then the door closed.
“...Did she just wink at me?”
Two Weeks Ago…
Godson drowsily opened his eyes, waking up from his slumber. He looked at his surroundings, skimming for a location, he skipped nearly all the important details, only seeing a door, a window, and a bathroom. Shrugging, he assumed he was back home, in his own bed, he continued looking around, his eyes slowly beginning to register more details, and noticed the room was being illuminated by the shimmering moonlight.
He eventually told himself that he needed to go use the bathroom real quick, and head back to bed. He began to move his body, but found himself unable to get up. As his brain slowly began to process things more efficiently, he looked around once more. Wide-eyed, he came to a realization.
He wasn’t in his bed, and he most certainly wasn’t home.
Eventually, he found his arms wrapped around something. He quickly looked in front of him, the one place he didn’t even bother checking, and found himself cuddling with a certain prismatic mare.
Upon further analysis, he noticed the sleeping pegasus had wrapped both of her forelegs around the human’s body, as well as her rear legs intertwined with his own legs. She hummed softly as she buried into his chest, mumbling something inaudible.
Instantly, Godson looked at himself, sighing a breath of relief as he saw he was wearing his clothes.
He shuffled a little bit, moving his head to get a better look at his surroundings, only for Rainbow to tighten her grip on him. He chuckled softly at the mare’s adorable actions, then analysed his surroundings once again.
“Twilight’s library…” He thought. “Oh. I’m in the guest room.”
“But… how did I get here? When did I get here?” He looked at the mare clinging to him. “And with Dash?”
He tried to think back to the last thing he remembered. Twilight left a letter at his house to go see her ASAP, she goes and leaves him in the library while she goes to grab something, Rainbow Dash comes downstairs, only to try to leave. They both find out the entire library was locked from the outside, not even the windows could be broken.
They then confronted each other, he convinced her the whole ‘take over Equestria’ fiasco was all just a dare that he refused to back down, and she forgave him for the trouble he caused. She then turned the tables, confronting him on his sudden explanation to her. Had it been someone else, they would’ve just ignored her for the rest of their life. But Godson didn’t, he still went and tried to apologize to her anyway.
Eventually he admitted his feelings to her. Not even giving a proper explanation why, just a few compliments.
And then they made out.
Godson went wide-eyed as he began to remember more clearly. “That’s right… We made out…”
“Holy crap, we made out…” He gawked, but then quickly narrowed his eyes as he remembered something else. “...And then we played ‘Go Fish’.” If he could, he would facepalm so hard right now. Though, he didn’t want to let go of the sleeping mare in front of him, he didn’t even want to disturb her. If he did, there might have been a small chance he’d ruin this moment for him.
Unfortunately, she still woke up, despite his attempt to keep her asleep.
“Hey…” She muttered, her eyelids fluttered open half-way. She looked up at the human, her head tilted up to face him, but still resting in his chest.
“Hiya…” He muttered back, trying to hold a chuckle at the half-lidded mare. “Did I wake you?”
“Kinda…” Dash replied, yawning quietly as she tried to keep herself up. “What’re you doing awake?”
“Just thinkin’.”
“About?”
“Stuff.”
“What kind of stuff?” Dash slowly began to fully wake up, scooting up to rest her head on Godson’s pillow.
“Stuff like… How adorable you are when you’re sleeping…” Godson smiled warmly.
Dash smiled back, then looked around at her surroundings. “When did we get here?”
“Twilight probably magicked us over here or something.” Godson shrugged. “I’m not complaining, though…”
Dash looked at him, recalling the past events. “Y’know… Making out with a human feels weirder than making out with a stallion…” She pressed her muzzle against his lips for a quick peck. “But… a good weird…”
“Does this mean you and I are… together, now?” Godson asked curiously.
“Only if you treat me right~” Dash cooed, wrapping her hooves around his neck.
“What do you mean by that?” Godson raised an eyebrow.
“Well… You can start by complimenting me…”
Godson wanted to tilt his head, but couldn’t. He was caught off guard by the pegasus’ sudden request, unsure exactly of what she meant.
“Come again?”
“You were saying nice things about me earlier…” Dash smirked softly. “I kinda rushed into things and didn’t get a chance to listen…” Her smirk went from being gentle, to an almost evil smirk. “Now, come on. One kiss per compliment.”
Godson tried to understand the sudden situation he was thrusted into. While she was right in the sense of not fully explaining why he liked her, it was odd to see her say something like this. Maybe she was doing this just to tease him? Or was she actually being serious about this?
“What’s taking you so long?” Dash rolled her eyes, before an idea popped into her head. “Maybe a freebie will get you focused…” With a soft grin, she closes the gap between the two of them, pressing her lips against his in a fiery passion. Despite not wanting to stop, she pulled back, just to further tease the human.
Caught off guard by the mare’s sudden actions, Godson took a moment to snap out of a trance. “Woah, that kiss was good…”
“Was it?” Dash asked curiously, giving him a quick peck. “I know I’m awesome and all… But I didn’t think I kissed very well…”
“Have you even kissed anyone before?”
“Maybe…”
Godson walked to the door of his house, noticing how quiet Linda was, compared to how she usually is when she hears him nearby. He shrugged it off, figuring she was sleeping, or something. He lifted the welcome mat, reaching for his key, only to find nothing where the key was supposed to be. Shocked, he looked back up at the door, hoping there wasn’t anyone inside to rob him.
He gently grabbed the doorknob, twisting it softly until it couldn’t go any further. He pushed the door slowly, poking his head through the small gap he created, he looked around, yet found nothing had changed, or even moved out of place. He opened the door all the way, and looked back down at the welcome mat, double checking for the key. Surely enough, the key was nowhere to be found.
Sighing, he ignored the fact he’d have to go get a new key, possibly even a new lock on the door, and walked inside his house.
He grabbed his phone from his pocket, and placed it on a nearby desk. Knowing Dash would be here soon for their movie, he made a direct trip to his bedroom, changed out of his work uniform that Rarity made, specially tailored for him. He glanced at his closet, noticing a certain pink shirt that said “I <3 Ponyville!”
He scoffed, knowing he’d never wear it. Unless he lost a bet or something. Hopefully if he did make a bet with someone, it wouldn’t be rigged, like whatever Luna was planning long ago.
Now that he thought about it, he wondered how the two princesses were, he’d need to go visit them sometime.
He shook his head, snapping out of his train of thought. He looked at the bed where Linda was supposed to be, only to find nothing in her place. At this point, his curiosity was piqued. His key is missing, and now Linda’s gone, as well.
“Why would anyone want to dognap her?” He spoke to no one in particular. He exited his room, making a quick trip to the living room to check one last thing.
He walked into the living room, finding the light was dimmed slightly, he narrowed his eyes, analysing the room for anything that might hurt him.
Instead, a certain cyan pegasus poked her head over the couch, upon recognizing the human, she flashed a sultry smile. “There you are!” She cheered. “It’s about time you showed up!”
Godson sighed in relief. “How long have you been waiting there?”
“Long enough.” Dash grumbled. “You know, you really shouldn’t keep a mare waiting…”
“If I knew you were already here waiting for me, I would’ve been here sooner…” Godson crossed his arms. “By the way, where’s Linda?”
“Fluttershy’s watching her for today. Now, get over here!” Dash patted an empty space on the couch, despite him not being able to see her from behind the couch. He did what he was told anyway, taking a seat on the couch as he joined her.
“So, what movie are we watching, Dash?” Godson asked curiously.
“Well, they just released the movie remake of ‘Daring Do and the Quest for the Sapphire Stone’ on DVD. And since I haven’t seen it yet, I, uh, I figured we could watch that.” Dash smiled sheepishly.
“I’m fine with that.” Godson nodded. “I haven’t read any of the books, so why not?”
“You’re lucky this is the first in the series, then.” Dash smiled. “Oh! And I also brought some food from that fancy restaurant a couple of blocks away from Sugarcube Corner.”
“They allow carryout?” Godson raised an eyebrow. “Crap, if I knew that, I would’ve gone there for lunch, and then just take it to work.”
“Neither did I!” Dash commented. “I just went there and asked ‘do you guys allow carryouts’, and they were completely cool with it!”
“Huh. Learn something new everyday, huh?” Godson said with a laugh.
“Yep!” Dash joined him in his laughter. “Anyway, I’mma go grab the food, go start setting up the movie.”
“‘Kay.” They both got up from the couch, Godson went for the DVD player, grabbing the movie Dash left on top of it, and inserting the disk into it. Dash made a direct trip to the kitchen, where she left the food, conveniently placed in decently sized styrofoam boxes. She even went as far as labelling the boxes, in order to avoid mixing them up. She looked at a calendar Godson placed near the table. The calendar was made in a way not only to see what date it was like every other calendar, but also had a small label under certain dates, listing the name of the holiday.
She looked at today’s date, and grabbed a pen left over on the table. She drew a large circle around it, and smiled. “Today’s gonna be perfect…”
She grabbed her food, placed it on top of Godson’s, and walked out of the kitchen with both of their food.
The day she marked wasn’t just some random day. On the calendar, on the bottom of the date she circled, had a label.
“Hearts and Hooves Day”.
Dash walked back to the couch, gently placing their food on a small table in front of it. “So, did ya get the movie started?”
“Yep.” Godson placed the remote down. “All I gotta do is press ‘play’, and we’re good.”
“Cool.” Dash smiled, hoofing him over his food. “Alright, press it.”
Dash and Godson snuggled closely as the movie played. Godson left his arm wrapped around her, while Dash rested her head on his chest, and her forelegs wrapped around his waist. For him, this was just a casual movie date, completely oblivious to today being as special as it was for Dash. For her, it was so much more than just a casual movie date, despite only being together with him for two weeks, Dash reveled in the attention she was given in those two weeks. She knew he was oblivious to the fact today was Hearts and Hooves, but it didn’t matter for her, she was gonna take this chance to spend time with him even more.
For she was planning on spending the night over.
Sure, they did sleep together once, but all they really did was just make out. Nothing much really happened, despite what she was hoping would happen today. She would’ve done something like this sooner, but she figured to wait just a little bit before she’d get called out for ‘being too fast’.
She can’t help it! She hates being patient! But, if she wanted this to work, she knew she’d have to wait. And what better day to execute her plan, then on Hearts and Hooves Day?
She could hear the rhythmic beating of his heart, it’s constant “bu-bump, bu-bump” soothing her as she watched the movie. She could also feel the gentle, peaceful rise and fall of his chest as he inhaled and exhaled, which only added to the effect.
“Hm…” Daring Do placed a thinking hoof on her chin. “There must be a pattern here… What do all these animals have in common…?”
She barely even payed attention to the movie being played in front of her, she would continuously switch from watching the movie, then turn her head to see Godson as he watched the movie. She couldn’t help but smile whenever she saw his bright and cheery face.
“Heh. When did I become such a sap?” She thought to herself.
“Aha!” Daring Do exclaimed. “These animals are all predators! Except… Rats!” She nervously placed a hoof on the tile with a picture of a rat on it.
She mentally shrugged, figuring she was better off not trying to think about it too much.
Then, she felt a hand caress her mane, she hummed softly in approval. Despite him not doing much, she still reveled in the attention.
Godson reached over for the remote, trying not to disturb Dash from her trance. He turned down the movie just a bit, allowing him to focus his attention to the cuddly mare holding him. He grabbed her by the base of her forelegs, and sat her on his lap, having her face him.
“W-What’re you doing?” Dash asked. “I thought we were watching the movie…”
“We were, until you kept looking up at me.” Godson chortled, watching as Dash’s face slowly tinted pink.
“So then… what are you doing?” Dash cocked her head, this wasn’t part of her plan, and she wasn’t entirely sure she’d like how this would turn out.
“Just relax…” Godson muttered, then slowly moved his head forward, pressing his lips against hers.
Caught off guard, Dash went wide-eyed, but quickly melted into the kiss as soon as she realized what was going on. She moaned into the kiss, enjoying the feeling of the human slowly beginning to caress her, and run his hands through her mane once more. She closed her eyes, wrapping her forelegs around his neck, bringing the two even closer. While his hands wandered lower, now reaching for her back, he began kneading and caressing the mare, coaxing her to relax herself.
She had to admit, he was doing a pretty good job. She let go of herself, allowing him full control over her body, minus her forelegs, which were still wrapped around him. While it was something she’d normally wouldn’t do, not even for him, she wanted to see what exactly he would do while he had this kind of power.
His hands ventured further, stopping right at her wings. He used his thumbs to get a grip on the base of her wings, and unfolded them. From there, he began to massage her wings, starting at the base, eliciting a moan of approval from the mare in his grasp, he took it as a signal to continue his pursuit.
”You won’t get away with this, Ahuizotl!”
Dash’s ear twitched at the sound, and pulled apart from the kiss, creating a small, yet thin strand of their saliva, connecting the two of them. They both saw each other’s flushed faces, which was evidence of how focused they were in the kiss. They both panted softly, taking a quick break for air. She looked back at the TV, which was still playing the movie in the background, then looked back at the human, who was already giving a worried expression, hoping he didn’t screw anything up.
“Could you… uh, turn off the TV?”
“Oh… uh… yeah...”
Dash released the human from her grasp, watching as he grabbed the nearby remote, switching the TV off. Soon, they found themselves in a more darker room, while the light was illuminating the room just a little bit, most of it was coming from the TV in front of them. The dim room suddenly seemed like a perfect mood-setter for the two of them.
“So much for eating dessert, huh?” Dash joked, remembering she was still sitting on his lap.
“You sure about that?” Godson grinned slyly, grabbing a hold of the mare once more. “I thought I was getting pretty close to dessert…”
A part of Dash caught on to where he was taking this, but the rest of her lingered, trying to understand what he meant.
And then it hit her right in the face. Her face immediately became red as an apple, blushing furiously as she understood what he meant.
“O-Oh…” She uttered, not expecting his sudden attitude, it surprised her simply over the fact that she was getting what she wanted. This was her entire plan, it just ended with an unexpected outcome. She was both excited, and nervous. And while it was her plan, she didn’t expect it to work. Now to find out that her planned worked without even trying, she wasn’t sure if she was ready.
“G-Godson?”
“Yeah?”
“Can I ask you something?”
“Go ahead.”
“You know today’s Heart’s and Hooves Day, right?”
He gawked in shock. “Really?” He asked. “I-I’m sorry, Dash, I didn’t reali—”
“Save it.” She placed a hoof on his mouth, shutting him up. “I did all of this because it was Hearts and Hooves Day.” She slowly cracked a smile. “I wanted to spend some time with you.”
“And… what about… this?”
“I was just about to get to that, shut up.”
“‘Kay.”
“I just wanna ask you, because this is probably the best time to ask…” She took a deep breath.
“Will you be my special somepony… like… for real?”
Godson blinked. He looked into the mare’s eyes, this was a genuine question, and it surprised him to see her this way. He knew Dash had a soft side, but this was something he’d never seen before. Before they were simply just dating, getting to know each other, but the more they hung out together, even if it was a date or not, the more they seemed to know each other.
Had she asked any sooner, he probably would’ve called her out for being too fast in their relationship, which was exactly what Dash feared would happen. But Dash asked on the pony equivalent of Valentine’s Day, so of course it seemed fitting for her to ask on this very day.
They’ve gone on enough dates to know each other, right? Four to five dates in the past two weeks, it’s not really that fast…
Eventually, he nodded. “Yeah, Dash. I’ll be your special somepony. Only if you’ll agree to be mine.”
“Deal.” Dash smiled, lunging herself forward for a quick peck. “Now that that’s over…” Her innocent smile faded to a more alluring grin. “Let’s see what we can do about that dessert…”
Author's Note
Well. That's one way to start off a new story...
Despite the chapter being long as crap, at least, longer than my usual standards, I had quite a bit of fun writing it.
And if that description of Linda wasn't good enough to give a good mental image (because I suck at details) here's an old picture of her looking high af (http://puu.sh/jWUls.jpg). (And by old, I mean like, two years, maybe?)
This is also the first time I write something "steamy". I don't expect to be writing these types of scenes very often, especially in this story. This was mostly a mix between practicing my writing, and setting up Godson's relationship with Dash for later chapters. (Yes. I'm going to treat "myself" as a character, even if it's a self-insert, it's still just a character in a story.)
I have mixed feelings about the whole "relationship", but I can't pretend "How I Kissed My Waifu" didn't happen. So, y'know, it's a little weird. But, whatever, I'm not trying to make this story that great anyway, it's supposed to be funny, not romantic.
I'll probably write "small" romance scenes every now and then during chapters, but they'll most likely never reach as far as this one did. We'll see how it goes in the next several chapters...
I'm also gonna apologize in advance for these next few chapters. But you were warned right in the description.

//-------------------------------------------------------//
             Chapter 1-8: A Discorded Vacation             
//-------------------------------------------------------//
Chapter 1-8: A Discorded Vacation
“And… how exactly did you score a vacation at the Canterlot Sands Resort?” Dash raised an eyebrow. “That place is expensive as heck!”
“I may have gotten a little something from the royal bank of Celestia…” Godson smirked softly.
“Is that also why we’re taking a carriage there?”
“What? Too much?” Godson looked at the mare.
“Just how big was this ‘prank’ of yours, anyway?” Dash asked curiously.
“Imagine Luna chasing her crown throughout the castle, having it vanish in front of her face, and then finding me wearing the crown, my legs crossed.” Godson explained. “And then I called her Moonbutt the minute she saw me.”
“That’s actua—”
“And I was eating a banana during the whole thing.”
“What?” Dash blinked. “Why?”
“I was hungry, and Celestia didn’t give me any lunch.” Godson shrugged. “Besides, it allowed me to make things even better by not letting Luna talk until I finished eating it.”
“You didn’t let Luna talk?” Dash giggled softly. “You didn’t even care you were telling a princess not to talk until you were done eating a banana?”
“Uh.” Godson paused for a moment. “Yeah, pretty much.”
Dash simply gave a blank stare, trying to imagine how that would’ve went.
“Celestia literally fell on the floor, laughing.” Godson added. “It was a really funny sight to see.” He wrapped an arm around her. “You would’ve loved to have been there just to see it.”
“I can imagine.” Dash laughed softly, leaning her head onto his shoulder. “So, how long did you say this vacation was again?”
“A week.”
“A week, huh?” Dash uttered. “You mean to tell me we’re gonna be in Canterlot Sands Resort for a whole week… Just us?”
“Just us.”
“No Celestia or Luna?”
“No Celestia or Luna.”
Dash blinked at the answer she was given, and smiled. “Great. I wouldn’t mind the extra alone time…”
“Knowing you, I’m not that surprised.”
“Shut up.”
Once the carriage had landed, the two were pretty much ditched by Celestia’s royal guard. They could only assume they would return once the week was over. They had walked up to the registration desk, where they had instantly noticed the pony at said desk was already trying to reach over to a button not far from her.
“I just realized something…” Dash spoke up.
“Is it the same thing that I realized?” Godson asked.
“Not being mentioned to Celestia during your time in Ponyville means that nopony outside of Ponyville knows who or what you are...” Dash replied.
“Yep.” Godson nodded. “We both realized the same thing.”
“STAY BACK!” The registration pony shouted as the two got closer. “I’M NOT AFRAID TO CALL SECURITY!”
“Y’know. We could either explain the situation like normal ponies would…” Dash spoke softly. “...Or we could mess with them just a bit.”
“If you’re up for messing with them. I may have an idea.” Godson added. “You may or may not like it.”
“Oh?”
“Follow my lead.”
“What’re yo—” Dash was instantly interrupted as the mischievous human spun slowly, grabbing the mare by the base of her forelegs, pulling her into a deep kiss. At first, the mare was surprised by his actions, but then seemed to lost any care at this point.
“LEAVE THAT POOR MARE ALONE!” The registration pony shouted once more. “I’M NOT AFRAID TO PUSH THIS BUTTON!”
Godson simply continued making out with his marefriend, whom had already wrapped her hooves around him, letting her ears fall back as they continued their show of affection.
Eventually, the two broke apart. Dash was left with a dumb smile on her face, only to be caught off guard once her lover began pecking her lips every so often, once he had teased her enough, he looked over to the registration pony.
“We’re here for our reservation…”
After proceeding through all of the boring registration. They finally made it to the door of their room.
“I can’t believe you pulled a stupid stunt like that, Godson…” Dash mumbled.
“So you mean to tell me you didn’t enjoy that kiss?”
“Shut up…” Dash rolled her eyes. “Let’s just go to our room and then argue about it…”
“As you wish, Dashie.” Godson chuckled, twisting the doorknob, and opening the door to reveal their room. They were greeted by quite a lavish sight. Lush carpets hugged the floor, a plush couch occupied the center of the room, and a curtain covered the back wall. Opening the curtains revealed a window that dominated the entire wall, illuminating the space brilliantly, and giving them a fantastic view of the beach and surrounding ocean. Off to the side a door opened to the bedroom. The bed was soft and feathery, and would support the most rowdy of activities. Soft, plush pillows covered the bed, but upon further investigation Godson discovered a banana, perched atop the mound of pillows. A note was attached, which said, “Enjoy your stay ;p”.
“Ignore that.” He muttered to Dash, putting it off to the side for now.
Godson returned to the main room, and sat down on the couch, closely followed by Dash.
“Woah…” Godson exhaled, as he and Dash gawked in awe, amazed by the complete beauty that was now their temporary room.
“Celestia really went all out returning the favor after that prank of yours…”
“Yeah…
“Hey what’s that?” asked a curious Dash as she looked around the room and noticed a small object previously hidden behind the opened door.
“What’s what?” Godson questions, glancing around like an idiot as he tried to find whatever Dash was looking at.
“That, in the corner... behind the door...” She pointed at it’s direction.
“Uh… It looks like a mini-fridge… I wonder why I hav—”
“What do you think is in it?” Dash interrupted, her eyes widened as she thought of something.
“I don’t know, in my world... it would probably be alcohol, but here I have no clu—”
“Does that mean...” Dash immediately cut him off. “...it could be filled with cider!?”
“Probably.” Godson shrugged. “I dunn— Dash…” He eyed the mare, who was already leaving the couch he was sitting on. “...What are you doing?”
“I’m checkin’ the mini-fridge!” Dash replied sharply. “Because if there’s cider, we’re drinkin’.”
“But—”
“No buts!” Dash interrupted, throwing the mini-fridge open.
Godson simply sat and watched as the mare quickly began digging through the contents of the mini-fridge.
After enough waiting, the human lifted an eyebrow. “Well, Dash?”
“Hm?” Dash turned her head, her hoof already carrying a bottle of cider on her lips as she drank the contents of the bottle.
“Why am I not surprised…”
“Dash. That’s like your tenth bottle… I think you’ve had too much, already.”
“Oh yeah?” Dash raised an eyebrow, her face covered in a bright red tint. “You wanna tell me that I’ve had too much?”
Godson nodded, an eyebrow raised at the mare’s question.
“Well…hic— y’knowwhatIthink?”
Godson shook his head.
“I shay… I need more!”
Godson narrowed his eyes at Dash’s retort. “Yeah no, that’s not happening.” He quickly snatched the bottle from his marefriend’s hoof, and held it behind him.
“H-h-h-heeeeeey!” Dash barked, immediately reaching over to the bottle in his hand, only to get blocked by his other arm. “Give—hic— it back! I’m not finished wiff it!”
“Dash.” Godson monotoned. “Look at you, your face looks like a friggin’ tomato. Any more cider and your face will pop.”
“What—hic— are you shaying?”
“I’m saying, Dash...” Godson rolled his eyes. “You’re drunk.”
“Oh yeah?” Dash gave up on the bottle, but instead aimed at a new target. “Weeell, wanna—hic— know what I think about that?”
Godson let go of the mare, his eyebrow raised over her sudden shift in target. “What?”
Dash immediately pressed her lips against his, forcing her tongue into his mouth as she made out with him, after she had enough, she pulled away. With a large, dumb grin, she spoke once more.
“You’re shexy.”
Instantly, the drunken mare fell to the floor, leaving her boyfriend to wonder what exactly just happened. He stood up, placed the bottle on a nearby table, and kneeled over to get closer to her.
“Dash?” Godson timidly spoke, he looked at her face, which still carried her dumb grin, though her eyes were closed. He slowly placed a hand slightly above her nose, and felt warm air tickle his hand. “Well, at least she’s breathing… That’s good…”
“I believe she’s doing this thing called ‘sleeping’.”
“Yeah.” Godson nodded. “That’s pro—” He immediately cut himself off, quickly realizing he wasn’t alone. He jerked his around, looking at the source of the sound. He jumped back, falling onto his back upon realization of who it was floating above him.
“Surprised?” Discord chuckled. “If anything, I should be the one who’s surprised. I was expecting this magical disturbance to be a lot more interesting than… whatever it is you are…”
“W-Wha…”
“Though, I suppose introductions are in order.” Discord slowly brought himself closer to the ground, quickly making a top hat appear out of thin air, and lifted it from his head with his paw. “The name’s Discord.” He quickly smirked. “Though I suppose you already knew that…”
“What gave you that idea?” Godson raised an eyebrow.
“I know a lot of things.” Discord bluntly replied. “The only thing I don’t know is…” He got uncomfortably close to the human. “...What kind of creature are you?” He looked over to the unconscious mare. “...And why is Rainbow Dash here with you? Shouldn’t she be with her friends, or something?”
“First off…” Godson deadpanned. “You’re in my bubble. Get out of it.”
“Ah, yes.” Discord stepped back. “Your imaginary ‘bubble’. The bubble that’s supposed to represent your personal space, am I right?”
Godson crossed his arms. “Got a problem with that?”
“Not at all.” Discord shook his head, throwing his hat off to some random corner of the room. “I’m just really curious.”
Godson scoffed, getting back onto his two feet. “I find that shocking. Someone with as much power and chaos as you must know a lot of things, even things from outside of this world.”
“You make a good point there…” Discord placed a thinking claw onto his chin. “I do know quite a lot of things from other worlds… So let’s see if I can use that knowledge to good use.”
Godson eyed the draconequus as he slowly started eyeing him, going around him to get every possible angle of the human. Godson rolled his eyes as he waited for the chaoting being to finally finish whatever it is he was doing.
“Black hair…” Discord began to analyse aloud. “Wears clothes… very pissy attitude.”
“You’re one to talk.” Godson huffed.
“...has quite the smart mouth.” Discord added. “Pale skin… Yep. I know exactly what you are.”
“Took you long enou—”
“You’re a talking hairless ape.” Discord concluded, finishing his sentence with a large smile.
“Annnd you’ve successfully offended me…” Godson groaned in disapproval. “I was wondering how long it would take…”
“Relax.” Discord laughed softly. “I’m only messing with hu, man.”
“That…” Godson struggled not to crack a smile. “...was such a terrible pun. And you should feel terrible just for making it.”
“Well, I thought it was a great pun.” Discord crossed his paw and claw together. “But, fine. Whatever floats your boat.”
Godson chuckled. “By the way.” He extended a hand. “The name’s Godson.”
“Hm?” Discord hummed in curiousity. “Strange. That’s not the name I was expecting you to say...”
“What were you expecting? Bo-bo?” Godson crossed his arms, giving up on the handshake he had offered.
“No. I was expecting… nevermind.” Discord shook his head.
Godson shrugged, looking back at his still knocked-out marefriend, then quickly remembered something. “Hold on a sec.” He shifted his view back to Discord. “You said something about a magical disturbance.”
“Indeed I did.”
“But the only magical disturbance that occurred recently was something from Twilight.”
“Not the only magical disturbance, but it did bring me closer to one I felt four and a half months ago.”
Godson widened his eyes. “Are you calling me a magical disturbance?”
“Well, considering you have no magic in you, yes.” Discord bluntly replied with a nod. “Yes I am.”
“Huh.” Godson placed a thinking hand on his chin. “I suppose that makes sense…?”
“Good!” Discord clapped his paw and claw together. “Glad we got that all figured out.”
Godson rolled his eyes, and proceeded to focus his attention back to his marefriend. He lifted her up, holding her tight as he made his way to the bedroom.
“Oh. Right.” Discord blinked. “I nearly forgot she was here…”
Godson ignored that last statement, and continued in his efforts to return Rainbow Dash to the bed until she would wake up once again.
“I never did figure out why she’s here though…” Discord thought aloud. “Especially here with you.”
Godson immediately stopped in his tracks, and turned around. “What’s that supposed to mean?”
“Well, for one, she’s a pony, and she has friends back in Ponyville…” Discord spoke. “And two, you’re…”
“Human?”
“I was gonna say repulsive.” Discord shrugged. “But human works, too.”
Godson narrowed his eyes. “Right. I’m not taking any of this from you.”
“Really?” Discord raised an eyebrow. “I thought you were enjoying my company!”
“No… I’m pretty sure that’s only Fluttershy who enjoys your company.” Godson bluntly replied, turning back around as he continued to take his still sleeping mare back to the bedroom.
After gently putting Rainbow into bed, and wrapping her in the bed’s blankets, he slowly proceeded to hop onto the other side of the bed, laying down next to her.
“Why, I’m hurt, Godson!” Discord chided behind him. “You mean to tell me you aren’t enjoying the little time I took away from my schedule to visit you?”
Godson turned around. “What schedule? Don’t you just do random stuff whenever you’re bored?”
“That’s none of your concern.” Discord huffed. “What’s my concern, however, is wondering why Celestia only gave you two one bed to sleep in this room, rather than two separate beds…”
Godson rolled his eyes with a groan. “We’re dating.” He sat up to correctly face the draconequus. “For being such a smart, near-omnipotent creature such as yourself. You sure do love asking questions for things you should already know.”
“Let me get this straight.” Discord shook his head, he immediately pointed a claw at him. “You. Are dating…” He pointed his claw at the sleeping mare. “Her?”
“Why exactly is that so hard to understand?”
“Because you’re… so…”
“Repulsive?”
“I was gonna say human, but repulsive works, too.”
Godson crossed his arms once more. “Well, you saw what the ‘magical disturbance’ was. Now could you please leave me alone?”
“Fine.” Discord grumbled. “But only because you asked nicely.” He looked at the mare behind the human. “Besides, it’s starting to look like your marefriend is having plans of her own.”
“What’re you—” Before he could finish his sentence, he was immediately blinded by his marefriend’s wings, covering his eyes as she gave him a backwards hug.
“Y’know…” She whispered softly. “...I just realized how comfortable this bed ish…”
“D-Dash?” Godson spoke quickly, pulling the mares wings off of him. He looked back to where Discord stood.
And found nothing in its place.
Dash immediately wrapped her hooves around him. “I think we should take advantage of this bed…”
“Am I gonna like where this is going, Dash?” Godson asked worriedly. “I can’t tell if you’re still drunk or not.”
“Doesh it matter?” Dash practically purred into his ear. “You and I still get to have some fun~...”
“I have a feeling you’re gonna kill me for letting you get this drunk either way…” Godson shrugged. “Y’know what… screw it, since I'm gonna die anyway… lemme just take off my glasses...”
“Good boy…”

//-------------------------------------------------------//
          Chapter 3-5: A Meet with the Princesses          
//-------------------------------------------------------//
Chapter 3-5: A Meet with the Princesses
Shadow laid awake as the sun peaked over the horizon, its bright rays cutting through the morning gray and stinging his eyes. He groaned, blinking and rubbing his eyes against the light, looking over to his wife, who was still sound asleep. As he got up, he quickly pecked her cheek before making his way down to the kitchen, making himself breakfast while becoming clouded in thought..
He sat munching toast when a sudden crashing sound snapped him out of his reverie. He turned around to find Spike laying on the floor surrounded by broken glass.
“You just had to break the goddamn window...” Shadow lamented. “Now I gotta have that fixed... Why did you come through the window and not the door anyways?”
“Well… You see—” Spike began to say before being interrupted.
“Nevermind, I don’t care.” Shadow interrupted bluntly.
“Hmph.” Spike crossed his arms. “Whatever… Why do you look like you haven’t slept in days?”
“It’s cause I haven’t.” Shadow monotoned, taking another bite of his toast.
“Oh.” Spike blinked. “Why?”
“Doesn’t matter why.” Shadow shook his head. “What does matter is something I need you to do…”
“Uh… Sure…” Spike nodded slowly. “What do you need?”
“I need you go get Fluttershy for me. I need her to take care of Twi for me while I’m gone.” Shadow explained.
“Where are you heading?”
“Canterlot?” Jorge raised an eyebrow. “The hell you going there for?”
“And possibly the Crystal Kingdom...” Shadow added.
“Again. The hell you going there for?” Jorge deadpanned.
“Where?” Shadow asked, “Canterlot or the Crystal Kingdom?”
“Both.”
“I need to talk to the Princesses.”
“And you’re telling me this… why?” Jorge asked.
“In case Twilight comes here looking for me.”
Jorge shrugged. “Alright… Have fun, I guess?”
“I’ll come see you when I get back.” Shadow noted. “Although..while I’m there..want me to pick you up any Celestial Bananas?”
“Sure.” Jorge nodded. “I’ll be sure to stab you with all the ones you bring.”
“...Nevermind, then…”
As the train arrived at the Canterlot train station, Shadow calmly made his way out, making his way to the castle. Passing by multiple buildings, houses, shops, until he’d finally made it.
He walked up to the castle doors, noticing the two guards standing in front of them. He simply ignored them, reaching his hoof towards the door.
“HALT!” One of the guards shouted.
“THE CASTLE IS NOT ACCEPTING VISITORS AT THIS TIME!” The other guard shouted.
“I’m not a vis—”
“PLEASE COME BACK AT A LATER TIME!” They both shouted in unison.
“I’m a prince, you dumbasses…” Shadow groaned. “Remember? Princess Twilight’s wedding? Remember the faggot she married? I’m that faggo— I… didn’t word that correctly…”
The guards looked at each other, then looked at Shadow, immediately recognizing him now that they thought back to what he mentioned.
“Apologies, Prince Shadow.” One of the guards spoke.
“It’s been awhile since you’ve been in Canterlot, we’ve nearly forgotten.” The other guard spoke.
As if on cue, they both opened the door behind them with their magic, moving out of the way as they bowed their heads slightly. “Enjoy your visit.” They both said in unison.
“That’s… gonna take some getting used to…” Shadow thought to himself, slowly walking into the castle.
He began to wander around the halls, moving from room to room as he continued his leisurely walk around the castle. If he would’ve known any better, he would’ve said he was lost.
If he hadn’t accidentally found the throne room…
“Shadow?” He heard a voice speak off in the distance.
He looked towards the source of the voice, finding Celestia sitting upon her throne. “Oh… Guess I’m not lost anymore…”
“What brings you here?” Celestia raised an eyebrow.
“Oh, uh. I wanted to ask you something.”
“Oh?”
Shadow walked up to her throne, clearing his throat as he prepared to speak.
“So, Twilight’s pregnancy is starting to become out of hoof for me to handle. Her mood swings range from being pissed as fuck, to clingy at the rarest occasion. So, I was wondering… Could I have ma—”
“No.”
Shadow blinked, not expecting to have been completely interrupted in such a rude fashion. “But you didn’t let me finish my—”
“No.”
“Why no—”
“No!”
“Why won’t you let me have magic?” Shadow stomped his hoof on the ground.
“You got yourself into this mess without magic. Now you’ll deal with it without magic as well.” Celestia bluntly explained.
“You’re seriously gonna let me deal with—”
“Yep.” Celestia nodded.
“It’s not even my fault! If anything, Twilight planned the whole thing without me!”
“Did you use magic to conceive the foal?”
“No…”
“Then you won’t use magic to help you with the pregnancy.”
“But—”
“End of Discussion.” Celestia bluntly stated.
“Bu—”
“End. Of. Discussion!”
Shadow groaned softly, tapping impatiently on the ground. “Fine. When’s your sister getting up?”
“In a few hours, why do you as—”
“‘Kay, thanks, bye!” Shadow was already halfway through the door, walking away from the room entirely.
“...I will never understand why Twilight married him…”
“I heard that!”
Shadow rolled his eyes, upset over Celestia’s refusal to give him magic. He would ask Luna, but he’d probably get the same result, so he decided he wouldn’t. However, he still had to talk to her regardless. It was the only way he would find out why his dreams have been troubling him so.
He soon somehow found himself in front of Luna’s chamber doors, which were guarded by another pair of guards. He raised an eyebrow, wondering what they were doing there in the first place.
He walked up to the door, hoping the guards would simply let him on his way through the door. But, to his dismay, they both reached their hooves out, blocking Shadow from the door.
“And what do you think you’re doing?” One of the guards asked.
“If you think I’m a visitor, I’m not…” Shadow groaned. “...Well, kinda. I’m a prince, though!”
The guards looked at each other, their eyebrows raised, then back to Shadow. “And?” They both asked in unison.
“Fuck. I was hoping that would shut them up…” Shadow thought to himself, clearing his throat softly. “So… can’t you just move out of the way and let me in?”
“This is Princess Luna’s chamber, what business do you have in there?” One of the guards inquired.
“Besides, she is still asleep.” The other guard added.
“One, I need to speak with her…” Shadow explained. “And two… so?”
Both of the guards deadpanned, looking at each other, then back at Shadow.
“Very well.” One of the guards spoke, stepping out of the way.
“Proceed with caution.” The other guard spoke.
Shadow raised an eyebrow at their comment, shrugging it off nearly instantly as he pushed the door open, making his way into her room.
The deeper he got into the room, the darker it seemed to get. And when the guards closed the door behind him, the entire room was pitch black, void of any light whatsoever. He tried to maneuver through the darkness without bumping into anything as he tried to find a light switch, or anything that would illuminate the room.
Eventually, Shadow’s random movements somehow ended with him practically stabbing a bed with his hoof. He blinked as he immediately stopped in his tracks, avoiding possibly waking up the alicorn mare.
He rubbed his eyes softly, trying to get his eyes adjusted to the dark, and hopefully see what he was doing, even if just barely.
Soon enough, he found himself able to just barely see the alicorn mare in front of him, wrapped under her blankets while she was curled up like a large ball.
“Should I wake her up…? Nah, she’s adorable sleeping…” Shadow begin to mentally debate with himself. “But... I really need to talk to her… but it could wait till she wakes up on her own… nah... I need to talk to her badly… just how to do it...” He looked over to his wing, smiling a bit as he now knew exactly what to do.
He extended his wing, reaching over top to above her nose, rubbing one of his feathers against it softly.
The sleeping mare slowly moved her face away, burying her muzzle in her blankets, groaning softly as she did so.
Shadow narrowed his eyes, deciding to move on to plan B. “C’mon, Luna… Time to wake up…” He grabbed Luna’s blankets, and yanked them off of her.
Luna’s eyes shot wide open. “INTRUDER!” She shouted loudly, immediately pointing her horn in Shadow’s direction, firing a large blast at magic at him. He reacted fast enough to nearly completely dodge the blast, having only singed part of his mane off. Luckily, it wasn’t very noticeable.
“I’M NOT AN INTRUDER!” Shadow shouted back. “HOLY FUCK!”
“THEN WHO ART THOU?” Luna asked in her Royal ‘Canterlot voice’ “AND WHY ART THOU WAKENING ME IN MINE CHAMBERS?”
“IT’S ME, SHADOW!” Shadow explained, still shouting like a madman. “I’M NOT A RAPIST, I’M NOT AN INTRUDER, I’M JUST SHADOW!”
“Please stop yelling now… Why have thou awaken me?” Luna rubbed her eyes softly, forcing herself awake. “I would’ve gotten up soon anyways...”
“WHAT?” Shadow raised an eyebrow. “I CAN’T HEAR YOU! I THINK YOU KILLED MY EARDRUMS!”
Luna deadpanned, pausing for a moment, then slapping him with her hoof.
“Better?” She cocked her head to the side.
“Oww…” Shadow rubbed the side of his face. “Yeah… You didn’t have to slap me, though…”
“Yes, but thou were annoying me.” Luna stated bluntly, sighing as she slowly got off of her bed. “I shall return for whatever thou must discuss so urgently after I have raised the moon.”
Shadow blinked. “Oh. Alright.” He watched as she left the room.
“G-Good evening, Princess Luna!” He heard one of the guards say from behind the door.
“Yes, thou art correct. Tis a good evening and it shall soon be a good night!”
“Of course it will, Princess! I’m sure of it!”
“Now, do not let anypony into my room, I have a visitor, and I would like to speak with him in private once I return.”
“Yes, Princess! Consider it done!”
Shadow sat down, patiently waiting for Luna to return. He began to look around, and realized Luna had forgotten to turn the lights on. “I wonder if she’ll mention the nightmares… Although, I’ve never seen her in my dreams…” Shadow’s mind began to wander off. “I wonder how she’ll react to me not sleeping for four days…” Soon, he found himself blankly staring off into space.
Then, his train of thought was snapped by one of the guards. “Princess! Back so soon?”
“It does not take much effort for me to raise the moon.” Luna began, partially entering her chambers before stopping and speaking to the guards once more, “I shall be returning to mine chambers now, while I am speaking with my visitor please ensure that not even mine sister is permitted to enter.”
“Will do, Princess.”
Shadow watched as Luna entered and shut her chamber doors once more. Lighting a candle as she sat in front of him. Once she was settled, he started to explain, “Luna...I came to talk to you about these dreams I’ve been having, at first they were every now and again but now they are frequent… I haven't slept in 4 days because of them...”
“Well, I am here now, please explain this dream of yours to me.” Luna replied calmly, with care laced throughout her soft voice.
“Well, it starts off with me being in the throne room of this castle…”
Celestia walked around the castle, making her way to her sister’s room. She ignored the two guards that stood in her way, and walked directly to the door.
“HALT!” One of the guards shouted, catching Celestia completely off guard.
“Princess Luna has us under strict orders not to let anypony in.”
“But I’m a Princes—”
“That includes her sister.” The other guard interrupted. “Which is, of course, you.”
“Hmph.” Celestia huffed. “Fine. I’ll leave her be…”
She walked away slowly, hiding off in another room. “You asked for this, Luna…” She levitated a mask in front of her. Flipping it over so she could see the front of it, she chuckled lightly, trying not to laugh at her masterpiece.
The guards remained in their place, standing perfectly still as they continued to do their job. But it wasn’t even minutes later for Celestia to return, wearing a mask that looked exactly like Jorge’s face, before he turned into a pony.
“Princess, what’re you do—”
“Hold up, guys…” Celestia spoke, trying her best to imitate the cuban. “Twilight screwed up a spell, and now I somehow look like Celestia… And my mouth somehow isn’t moving…” She explained. “I just need to get in there to get Shadow’s help with something…”
The guards looked at each other, their eyebrows raised, then looked back at “Jorge”.
“Uh-huh… And how did you know Prince Shadow was in here?”
“Celestia told me.”
“Oh, okay.” The guards nodded, quickly stepping out of the way. “Right this way…”
“Thanks!” ‘Jorge’ nodded, making his way into the room, but pausing right at the door as ‘he’ pulled something out of nowhere. “Here, have a banana.” Once the banana was in the guard’s hooves, then ‘he’ made his way inside.
Once she was halfway inside, she pulled the mask off, grinning wildly as she began to speak. “So, Luna…!” In an instant, she froze right in her tracks.
Luna was glaring angrily right at the white alicorn as Shadow was embraced by her wings while he was softly, yet audibly, sobbing into her. “You just had to enter anyways...well seeing you’re here, go send word for the need of a train to the Crystal Kingdom immediately.”
“But—”
“NO BUTS!”
Somehow, Jorge felt a disturbance. And it bothered him greatly, as his whole body began to cringe softly as long as he continued to think about it.
“Jorge?” Dash raised an eyebrow. “You okay?”
“Someone… Just tried to imitate me… and failed… incredibly…” Jorge muttered, trying to focus back on their movie.
“And you know this… how?”
Jorge stayed silent for a moment, trying to understand how he was able to sense this horrendous act. Then, in an instant, it clicked in his head.
“Celestia…”
Shadow grabbed onto his seat as tight as he could, trying not to go crashing into walls with the train’s current ridiculous speed.
Luna did exactly what he asked. She booked him the fastest train to the Crystal Kingdom.
What he didn’t expect, however, was the train actually hitting hyperspace. It could’ve at least failed at that like the Millenium Falcon.
“LUNA! THIS IS ALL YOUR FAULLLLLT!” He shouted, despite being the only one in the train, he still felt the need to shout it out.
In a matter of minutes, the train made the sharpest stop in the world, stopping nearly instantly at its station. Causing Shadow to be flung off towards the front of the train, crashing into the wall.
Groaning, Shadow rubbed his head, regaining his balance as he tried to stand back up. He slowly made his way out of the train, still rubbing his head. He looked off in the distance, seeing the rather large castle where Shining and Cadance resided.
“Welp… I’m here…”
Shadow began to wander around the castle. Not being familiar with its rooms and overall interior. He was more lost here than he was back in Canterlot, it also didn’t help he hasn’t slept in four and a half days, now. He continued walking from room to room, randomly wandering as he tried to find Cadance.
He continued walking around, observing his surroundings as he walked, to the point where he wasn’t even paying attention to where he was walking.
Then, he bumped into somepony.
Both Shadow and the pony fell into the ground, smashing their faces onto the crystal floor.
Shadow slowly raised his head, groaning softly as he tried to get back up. He looked at the pony in front of him, noticing it was a stallion. He barely recognized the stallion, and figured he’d probably know him better if he got a better look at his face.
If only it wasn’t smashed against the floor…
The stallion in front of him growled, pulling his head off from the ground. “Hey! Watch where you’re go—” He looked up at Shadow, realizing who he was now talking to.
“O-Oh! Sorry, Prince Shadow!” Flash Sentry’s eyes widened, immediately bowing down after his apology. “I-I should’ve looked where I was going!”
Shadow recognized the pegasus guard, and quickly attempted to stand perfectly straight, as well as keeping his head up, trying to look as regal as possible, only for him to trip slightly, nearly falling over like an idiot once more. “R-Right…” He muttered. “It’s fine… It’s mostly my fault, anyways…”
Flash raised an eyebrow, noticing his bloodshot eyes. “A-Are you alright, Prince Shad—”
“Just call me Shadow…”
Flash cleared his throat softly. “Are you alright… Shadow?” He asked. “You look like you haven’t slept in a while…”
“I haven’t…” Shadow sighed. “I’ve been having a bad week, lately…”
“I’m sorry to hear that, Shadow…” Flash pouted, his ears flopping back. “Is there anything I can do to help?”
“Well… Actually…”
Flash had led Shadow all the way to Cadance’s chambers, standing right outside her large, wooden doors. Flash simply nodded, and walked away.
Shadow blinked. “Where are you going?”
Flash froze in his tracks, turning his head back at Shadow. “Are you kidding me? I’m not getting involved in waking up Princess Cadance from her nap…”
“Why not?”
“Find out for yourself, I’m staying as far away from those doors as possible.”
In an instant, Shadow blinked as the pegasus guard went as far as using his wings to get a boost to run away from the scene. He then shrugged, not seeming to care anymore. He looked back at the doors in front of him, grabbing one of the handles, and giving it a gentle tug.
After a couple of attempts, Shadow realized his efforts were futile, as the doors would not budge. He raised an eyebrow, attempting to pull on the door harder, only for that to fail as well.
Mere moments later, Shadow came up the perfect plan.
He grabbed a phone he had on him...somewhere… and guessed his way through the password lock.
Luckily, he wasn’t greeted by a wallpaper that was as mentally scarring as the last time he held this phone. He turned the volume up to its complete maximum, looked through the songs carried in the phone, and began to play it, with the phone’s speakers facing Cadance’s door.
“NOW WATCH ME WHIP. NOW WATCH ME NAE NA—”
In an instant, the doors were slammed open, one of them smashing right into his face. With a soft thump, Shadow fell to the ground, nearly passing out from the intense blow to the face.
“WHOEVER IS PLAYING THAT INFERNAL SHIT EXTREMELY LOUD IS GOING STRAIGHT TO THE DUNGEON!”
Shadow dropped the phone, rubbing his muzzle with both of his hooves. “Ow…” He groaned. “I think you broke my nose, sis…”
Cadance blinked, looking behind the open door to find the stallion in pain. “Oh. It’s you.” Her anger seemed to fade away in seconds, as she quickly began to laugh softly. “I’d feel bad and all, but… That’s payback for the jelly donut. It took me a damn week just to get the visible jelly out of my mane… In fact, you’re lucky I was able to pull it off for the wedding...”
“I blame the fact your mane’s colored like jelly.” Shadow muttered, still rubbing his muzzle as he tried to make the pain fade away.
“Do you want another broken body part?” Cadance raised an eyebrow.
Shadow’s eyes widened as he quickly shook his head in response.
“That’s what I thought.” Cadance smirked, only for it to fade away as she could still hear the annoying song playing. She looked over at the source of the song, preparing to lift a hoof to smash it.
Shadow looked at the phone, then quickly grabbed it as he turned the song off.
“...That’s not your phone, is it?” Cadance deadpanned.
“No. No it’s not.”
“Does it belong to who I think it belongs to…?”
“Dashie? Have you seen my phone?”
“Not since Shadow left yesterday, no.”
Jorge deadpanned, growling softly as he immediately knew what happened to his phone.
“Shadow…”
“Yes. Yes it does.”
“Why do you have Jorge’s phone?”
“Why not?” Shadow raised an eyebrow.
Cadance eyed her brother-in-law, her eyebrow raised slightly as she looked at him with an unamused expression. Seconds later, she rolled her eyes, and shrugged. “Whatever. You woke me up, I’m awake. What do you want?”
“I wanted to talk…” Shadow simply huffed as he tried to cross his hooves in his current position. “Didn’t have to be so rude about it…”
Cadance simply deadpanned.
“Look. I haven’t slept in almost five days and I really just need to talk with my sister!”
Cadance realized what the sleep-deprived stallion had said, noticing his bloodshot eyes, drooping wings, slight wobbling, all backing up his statement. She looked at him with worry, reaching out a hoof to help him up. Once she had helped him up, she spoke.
“Let’s take this to my room, alright?”
As Shadow sat at the edge of Cadance’s bed, he looked over to her sitting beside him.
“Well... there has been a lot on my mind… I-I have been having nightmares for a few days… and I just haven’t been able to sleep because of it...” Shadow muttered, mustering strength to continue.
“Alright…” Cadance sighed softly. “Just… start from the beginning…”
“Well… it all started when…”
“I can hardly stay focused anymore...” Shadow fell silent, as he laid down resting his head on his hooves.
“Well...” Cadance started, as she draped a wing over Shadow, but was cut short as Shining let himself into the room
“What’re we talking about?” He nonchalantly said, coming the rest of the way through the door.
Cadance merely glared at him.
“...When’d Shadow get here?” he asked, noticing the despondent stallion. “And what’s wrong with him, did something important happen?”
Cadance said nothing, as she continued to glare.
Shining, finally noticing the look his lovely wife was giving him, quickly said “I can help, I swear.”
“You have five seconds until I show Shadow that sisterly love is nothing compared to my love for you.” She calmly stated
“Isn't it a bit early for wifely duties, Cadance?”
“One...”
“Honey, are you sure I can’t help...? Shadow looks a little worse for wear...” Shining now stammered.
“Two...”
“That’s my queue, I’m out.” He said, preparing to leave. “Never let her get to three, Shadow.” He commented behind him as he went out the window.
“I thought it was to a count of five...” Shadow half-heartedly wearied.
“Exactly.” commented Shining, now sitting on the balcony.
“Three...” Cadance calmly shouts after him.
“Fuck…” Shining said, vainly trying to find a way off the balcony. “Shadow, you gotta help me! You don’t know what she’s capable of!”
Shadow just sat there with his head on his hooves as Cadance gave him a hug and got up, making her way over to Shining.
“Four...” Cadance snarled.
Shining, now back inside the room, scrambled to find an escape, but just ended up in the corner of the room farthest from Cadance. “Honey please, what did I even do?” He pleaded.
Cadance now loomed over him, looking like something from a nightmare. Then she spoke, her voice brimming with rage.
“Five.”
“Why didn’t you help me…?” Shining groaned, rubbing his head as he tried to poke the watermelon stuck on his horn without hurting himself more. “Whatever happened to ‘bros before hoes’?”
“Are you calling your wife a hoe?” Shadow raised an eyebrow, sitting down on the floor.
“That’s besides the point.” Shining moved his hoof in a shooing gesture. “What matters i—”
“So you are calling your wife a hoe!”
“It’s just a metaphor, shuddap!” Shining retorted. “You still could’ve helped me!”
“No I couldn’t have.”
“Why’s that?”
“One. I’m tired as fuck. I can barely move my body, let alone react to anything or help anyone.” Shadow explained. “Two. I’ve already learned my lesson to not become the target of an angry Princess of Love. Three. This is payback for when I asked for your help back in Ponyville.”
“B-But—”
“And four… It’s really funny seeing you locked up in your own dungeon.”
“Dammit, Shadow!” Shining stomped the ground with a hoof, wincing in pain as his sudden movements shook the watermelon stuck to his horn.
“But hey, look on the bright side, melon-head.” Shadow chuckled. “At least you’ll be safe from Cadance’s wrath for a while.”
“How so?”
“I dunno, I’m just assuming Cadance is gonna be too lazy to come back down here.”
“You’re just assuming?”
Shadow shrugged. “I’m tired, I’m sleepy, I can’t sleep. I’m basically awake and asleep at the same time. Cut me some slack today...”
Shining simply deadpanned.
“Anyway…” Shadow groaned, slowly getting back up. “My work here is done. I’ll be seein’ ya, Shining.”
“Wait! Shadow! You can’t leave me in here!” Shining shouted, holding on to the bars in front of him with his hooves, watching as his brother-in-law simply continued on his path. “Shadow!”
“SHADOWWWWWW!”
Jorge stood by the train station, waiting for his Canadian friend once again. Shadow had given him a close estimate of when he would return, and hopefully his estimations were correct. Otherwise all this time the Cuban had spent would have all gone to waste.
Soon enough, a train came rolling by, seemingly empty. It slowly made its stop, its doors opening, revealing a familiar dark grey stallion walking through it.
“Right on time.” Jorge nodded. “Didn’t think you’d actually be here at the time you told me.”
“I’m a prince, Jorge.” Shadow rolled his eyes. “I can get things done.”
“Showoff.” Jorge huffed. “Well… How was your trip?”
“Pretty meh.” Shadow admitted. “I got the answers and help I needed, though.”
“Glad to hear…” Jorge patted Shadow on the back with a hoof. “Maybe now you can actually get some sleep.”
“Cadance knocked me out with some spell. And then tossed me into a train back home.” Shadow sheepishly smiled. “To be honest, me being here on time was a coincidence.”
Jorge deadpanned. “So if it weren’t for Cadance, you might’ve not even made it back in time…”
“Uh… Kinda?”
“...At this point, that doesn’t surprise me anymore.”
Shadow blinked, having instantly remembered something from his entire trip. “That reminds me…” He dug into his saddlebag, pulling a smaller paper bag from it. “I brought you some souvenirs.”
Jorge raised an eyebrow, taking the bag from his friend’s grasp, looking inside it. “Shadow? This is my phone…”
“Oh. Yeah, I brought your phone back too…” Shadow looked at him with a sheepish grin. “Almost forgot about that…”
Jorge narrowed his eyes, looking further into the bag, deadpanning as soon as he saw a certain object under his phone. He stuck his hoof in the bag, pulling out a gold banana. “Seriously?”
“Hm?” Shadow looked over at him, noticing the gold banana. “What? It’s a gold banana.”
“Seriously?”
“Celestia told me to bring it, I’m just the messenger!”
“Do you know where this banana is going?”
“To the black market? That shit’s real gold…”
“Nope.”
“Up Celestia’s ass?”
“Shadow…” Jorge looked at him with the most deadpan expression he’d ever seen. “This banana’s going to the black market, after it’s been shoved up your ass!”
Shadow went wide-eyed. “You wouldn’t dare.”
Jorge narrowed his eyes. “Try me.”
“Jorge…” Shadow took a step back, noticing his cuban friend slowly walking towards him. “Don’t do it, Jorge…”
Unfortunately, Jorge didn’t seem to listen, causing Shadow to panic slightly more. “Jorge…”
In an instant, both of the pegasi flared their wings open, preparing to fly.
“JORGE NO!” Shadow shouted.
Jorge shouted back. “JORGE YES!”
Author's Note
Late update is late.
That's to be expected though with hurricane matthew running around on a destructive rampage...