All's Fair in Love and War

by Captain Unstoppable

Rating: everyone
Tags: Comedy, Trenderhoof, Romance, Slice of Life, Applejack, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, Soarin
Length: 23696

Applejack has always viewed herself as a simple farmer, nopony to make a fuss over. However, two of the most famous and wealthiest stallions think otherwise, and are willing to spend every bit they have on her.

Applejack has always viewed herself as a simple farmer, nopony to make a fuss over. However, two of the most famous and wealthiest stallions think otherwise, and are willing to spend every bit they have on her. Who will win Applejack's affection before their bank accounts hit zero?

Thank you to TheMaskedFerret, Jake the Army Guy, Docontra and Skeeter The Lurker for the edits.

Thank you goes to handiNavi for the cover art!

Published 2015-09-17 01:10:01 UTC
Last updated 2015-11-10 18:32:57 UTC

Chapter 1: This Means War

Chapter 1: This Means War

Easing into a gentle glide, Soarin let his wings dip down to cut through the clouds, causing small wisps to float up into the air and fade away. Today was the perfect day for flying, but that wasn’t why he was out this morning. He had one goal in mind today, and that was to find a certain mare and ask her out on a date.

He had been searching for her ever since the Grand Galloping Gala. She had been haunting his dreams at night; he could envision her piercing green eyes, her athletic build, and beautiful voice. Everything about her had left a mark upon him. But the one thing that kept him up most nights, that would creep into his mind at the most random of moments, what would make him want to stop everything he was doing and find her was…

Her pie.

That orange mare had turned the once proud PlayColt that he was into a love struck colt to say the least. Not a day went by that at some moment he would not think of her. She had left such an impression on him, her and that delicious pie of hers, that it nearly drove him insane over the fact he had forgotten her name.

How could he have forgotten her name?

While her voice, eyes, and movements were ever engraved into his mind he had forgotten that one crucial detail needed to find her. How lost he would have been in his search for her, if Spitfire had not told him.

His captain simply could not believe that he had forgotten her name. She was an Element of Harmony, a savior of Equestria, and one of the top placing rodeo ponies in Equestria.

Applejack.

Soarin was also a bit surprised that he would have forgotten a name like that as well, especially when she made the best apple pie he had ever had before in his entire life. Every pie he has had since then paled in comparison to her’s. None of them could hold the flavor, the texture, that perfect first bite that her’s held. No pony he had met could do it like she did, and combined with her looks it was no wonder why he was so attracted to her, and why he wanted to ask her out.

From there, it did not take long for him to figure out where she lived, as she and all the other elements lived in the same town. She lived outside of the town on Sweet Apple Acres, her family’s farm that grew apples to make those wonderful pies he loved so much! If he did hit it off with her he wondered if he could get a small discount on those pies.

Soarin couldn’t wait to see her again, so tucking his wings in, he nose-dived through the blanket of clouds under him and burst out through them. On the other side he was greeted to site of the small town with brightly colored ponies, going on with their normal lives. But his eyes were locked onto the large apple orchard that was just a mile or two away from Ponyville. With a mighty flap of his wings, he broke himself out of the dive and soared towards the farm.

As he flew, his mind was already going through the list of pick up lines he had worked on for this occasion. While he was no stranger to dating, it was the mares that normally asked him out instead, or it was a mutual idea, but approaching a mare about going on a date was strange territory for him. The last time he had to do such a task was back when he was trying to find a date for prom. Sure he was good looking, and known as a great flyer, however, he was also known as a dork and a bit of a goofball which turned a lot of mares off.

Joke was on them now anyway, he was Co-Captain of the Wonderbolts and had gone on dates with many high class mares.

Lets see… I’m not a photographer, but I can picture you and me together. No wait… that’s stupid. If you were a vegetable, I would call you a cute-cumber… that would be good if she wasn’t an apple farmer. Soarin went down the possible list of line he could use on the apple farmer, but each one seemed to be dumber than the one before, or more a one night stand kind of line than a go on a date line. At this rate, he would end up saying something like ‘Nice hooves, want to buck?’

Before Soarin could come up with anymore idiotic lines, he saw a large red pony in the distance pulling a plow. Scanning the area around him, Soarin could not see any trace of the orange mare he was seeking, nor any other pony to ask where she might be.

Deciding that flying around aimlessly might make him look like more of a fool, he spread his wings out and started to slow down before landing to approach the large pony that had stopped working and was looking right at him.

Holy Celestia he’s big! Soarin thought, looking at the large red pony, that was easily a head or two taller than him, and looked like had the muscles to pull a train on his own. Smiling at the pony, Soarin walked towards him trying not to shake and shiver like a colt.

“Hi there! I was wondering if you could possibly tell me where Applejack is?” Soarin asked, as he looked up at the huge red stallion, it was not often that he had to look up to talk to other ponies, most were the same height as him or a bit smaller.

The red pony didn’t seem to change much when he asked, his face showing no real emotion or even motion outside blinking occasionally and chewing on the bit of straw in his mouth.

“Whaddya want with ma sister?”

Oh crap! Soarin could feel a cold rush over his body as he looked up at Applejack’s big brother. Soarin kept himself from looking too shocked, or at least he hoped he was as he grinned at him.

“Well… I was planning to ask her out on a date, if that is alright by you of course! She is a very pretty mare, and her pie tasted amazing! Not like that! I mean her apple pie! I mean…” Soarin trailed off as he looked up at the larger pony, already fearing the worse if he got on the bad side of him. His body shrunk slightly as the red pony raised an eyebrow towards him, but stayed completely silent.

After what felt like an eternity of awkward silence, the pony rolled the piece of straw from one side of his mouth to the other as his eyebrow lowered.

“Not ma choice is it. If ya want to go out with ma sister, its up ta her, not me.” The red pony said, sitting down in front of Soarin and looking out towards the orchard. “She’s out there somewhere, inspectin’ the trees. Doubt ya’ll see her from the air,” the stallion said, before turning back to Soarin. “Treat her right, Ah doubt we’ll have problems,” with that, he sat up and went back over the to field he was plowing. As he did so, Soarin let out a sigh of relief that the larger pony didn’t seem too protective.

“Thank you… uh…”

“Macintosh. Most ponies around here call me Big Mac.” Big Mac said, before plowing the fields again.

Big is right, Soarin thought, before trotting towards the apple orchard in search of the mare he had come to court. His mind was already hard at work again thinking up lines he could use to impress her. What mare would not be impressed by him naturally? He was good looking, Co-Captain of the Wonderbolts, rich beyond anypony’s wildest dreams, and a celebrity. What mare wouldn’t want to go on a date with him?

Upon entering the orchard, however, Soarin ran into his first problem. The rows of apple trees all looked the same, and were in perfect rows with equal spacing and height. It would be easy for a pony to get lost in there, let alone make it impossible to find a pony in all of it. But he was not one to give up easily! If he could talk to the older brother that looked like he could snap a flyer like him in half without trying, how could he not get past this simple obstacle?

With the same smile he wore anytime before a race, Soarin went into the orchard in search of the orange mare, ready to woo her.

Thirty minutes later, Soarin was at a total loss. He could not figure out where he was in the large orchard, and was no closer to finding Applejack. Everything looked the same, and even if he did fly up to look out over the orchard all he could see was a sea of green. One would think that finding a orange mare in a sea of green would be an easy task, but he couldn't see past the sea of green leaves!

Giving a low sigh of distress, Soarin considered going back to the farm and waiting for her emerge from the orchard by herself. Wandering around the orchard with no direction in which he should go was nothing but pointless at this point. However, before he could take to the air one more time, he heard a voice he had not heard in such long time, that his heart skipped a beat at it.

“How about ya go back ta the farm Bloom, Ah’ll finish up here fer today,” Soarin’s head whipped back and forth, his ears fully extended as he searched for the bright orange of the mare he had sought out all morning.

From the corner of his eye, he saw a flash of yellow running through the orchard back in the direction of the farm, or he believed since he was still lost, then following the blur from where it came from was her.

Within the orchard, surrounded by the trees that bore the fruit that was used to make those amazing pies was Applejack. She was wearing the same hat he had seen her wear during the gala, dirt was evident on her hooves and some of her body from hearty work as she wiped the sweat from her brow.

Others might have just seen a dirty farmer, that was in need of a shower or two before they would approach her, but to Soarin she was the definition of beautiful. The sweat on her brow seemed to glisten like pearls and the dirt on her hooves only emphasizd her dedication to her crops. From the way the sun was shining upon her, and beauty that she seemed to absorb from being in her element made Soarin feel unworthy to address a mare of such beauty.

While lost in her beauty, Soarin did not notice that Applejack had noticed him standing there just staring at her.

“Uh… can Ah help ya mister?” A surge of heat over took Soarin’s face as Applejack addressed him, snapping him out of his trance.

“Oh! Sorry,” Soarin laughed, trying to calm himself down as he took a few cautious steps towards her. “It has been awhile Applejack, how have you been?” Soarin asked, he felt like that young stallion that could not get a date to prom again.

“Ah’ve been good,” Applejack took a half step backwards, raising one eyebrow at the stallion. “Ah’m sorry mister, but Ah don’t seem ta recognize ya,” Applejack finally said, sending a shock through Soarin’s body.

He could not remember the last time somepony didn’t recognize him. Co-Captain of the Wonderbolts, Equestria’s top bachelor for the last three years, he was famous! He gave his head a hard shake as he looked at her, still smiling and trying to hide any shock that might be present.

“That’s okay! My name’s Soarin Nimbus, I’m the Co-Captain of the Wonderbolts, I bought a pie from you at the Royal Gala a few months back,” Soarin could not believe that she did not recognize him, but it was fair. He couldn't remember her name and she was an Element of Harmony.

At the mention of pie, Applejack’s eyes lit up as the memories began to return to her. “That’s right! Sorry fer not recognizing you Sugarcube, how have ya been? Lookin’ fer another pie?” The way she called him ‘Sugarcube’ sent a chill up and down Soarin’s spine. What was it about this mare that it had such an effect on him?

“I would love to get another pie from you,” Soarin said, taking a few steps towards Applejack, trying to give her that smile that he had perfected in photo shoots that was guaranteed to make mares blush. “But, there is something else I would really like from you,”

“Oh? What’s that?” Soarin once again had to fight the look of shock, how was she so resilient to his smile? Most mares would be blushing madly, and looking at him like they were about to melt. Instead, she was cocking her head to the side slightly, with her mane slowly falling to the side framing her face, her eyes seeming to glow in the sunlight, and the way she had her eyebrow raised… she was turning the tables on him.

“Ya okay there Sugar? Yer face is turnin’ awful red.” Once more, Soarin had to shake his head. Why was he getting so lost in her eyes so easily?

“Yes, sorry about that. It’s just I have never met a mare as beautiful as you,” Soarin was going for the smooth talk, he needed to regain control. Applejack’s eyes widened slightly, before a blush covered her own face as she started to rub her forelegs in a mixture of embarrassment and flattery.

“Aww shucks, Ah’m nothin’ special,” Soarin just grinned, she was looking even cuter now as she tried to avoid eye contact.

“You are to me,” he said, in a voice barely above a whisper. “And that is why I was hoping you would make me one lucky stallion and go on a da—” Before Soarin could finish, a very haughty and cultural sounding voice cut off the pegasus.

“There you are Applejack my dear! Did you know your orchard is set up in the same fashion as the excellent orchards in Fuji, it’s a lovely place but they lean towards grouping the drought tolerant species over here to the east, here, let me show you and I can tell you all about this delightful little cafe I found,” Soarin whipped around to see a light brown unicorn approaching them. his mane done up in a puffy fashion, a pair of white glasses resting on his muzzle, and a green sweater with orange trim around the neck.

He didn’t even seem to notice that Soarin was standing there, or that he even existed as he walked past him to Applejack. He took her hoof into his own and kissed it, causing the farmer to turn a shade redder than when Soarin had complimented her, causing a rage to build up inside of Soarin.

“Tre- Trenderhoof, Ah didn’t know you were back in town,” Applejack stuttered out, as she quickly took her hoof back from the unicorn. Soarin glared at the unicorn from behind, hearing him give out a light chuckle.

“Well my dear, I simply could not stay away from a pony with such captivating beauty as you. Now, how about we go to that cafe and we can discuss th—” Soarin could not take anymore from this unicorn, he was just about to ask her out when he came out of nowhere. Stepping in front of the unicorn he flared his wings, blocking AJ’s view of him.

“I’m sorry, but I believe I was about to ask her out,” Soarin laughed, as he turned his attentions back to Applejack. “Besides, I don’t think a mare of her beauty would want to be in some cafe, I had already made reservations at L’escargot Noir,” Soarin flashed a smile at Applejack, keeping Trender out of sight.

“L’escargot Noir? Ah’ve heard Rarity talkin’ about that. That’s really fancy, you could really get us in there?” Soarin just smiled at Applejack’s reaction, her eyes widening in surprise. Before Soarin could seal the deal, a loud snort interrupted him.

“L’escargot Noir? Please! That is a third rate dive,” Trenderhoof pushed past Soarin, shoving his wings out of the way, and pulling a feather out of his mane. “That food is simply revolting, if you wish to have something that is beyond comparison. I know the head chef of Le Saumon D’Or. I could get us a table there in less than an hour.” Trenderhoof adjusted his glasses slightly before glancing over at Soarin with a smirk.

Soarin glared at Trenderhoof as he saw the expression on Applejack’s face change once again at the mention of the new restaurant. Who was this pony, and how could he possibly have better connections than him?

“By the way, do you know who I am?” Soarin glanced over at the brown unicorn, a look of indignation on his face.

“You? Do you know who I am?” Soarin retorted, taking a step towards the unicorn, his wings flared slightly.

Trenderhoof stared at Soarin for a brief moment, rubbing his chin as he looked at the out of uniform Wonderbolt. “Thankfully not, I only know and write about the most famous and influential of ponies,” The way Trenderhoof talked set a fire off in the depths of Soarin’s stomach. How dare he not know who he was.

“Obviously you suck at your job. The name is Soarin Nimbus, you know the Co-Captain of the Wonderbolts.” He stressed, as he flashed that trademark smile of his, the one that plastered posters of him all over Equestria. Trenderhoof’s expression did not change, as he rubbed the few whiskers on his chin.

“Co-Captain? No wonder I don’t know you. Just like that third-rate restaurant you suggested, you are just a cheap knockoff, easily replaceable.” Trender gave a wave of his hoof before turning back to Applejack and ignoring Soarin completely. “Unlike you my dear, for there is no pony in all my travels that could compare to you.”

“Replaceable?” Soarin repeated, twitching slightly at that word. He was one of the best flyers in all of Equestria, where did this guy get off saying that he was replaceable. Stepping forward, he grabbed Trenderhoof by the shoulder and forced him to turn around. “Now listen here, I am known throughout Equestria and beyond, where does a hipster like you get off by—”

“A hipster?!” Trenderhoof growled, knocking Soarin’s hoof away and taking a step forward to glare at him. “I am the number one source of celebrity news in all of Equestria, I can make or ruin careers with just a flick of my quill. Now, as I was here first, so I will be taking the lovely—”

“You were here first?! Soarin spat, taking another step forward, his green eyes locked with Trender’s gold. “I was talking to Applejack long before you showed up. Now you better back off before I show you some har—”

“Shut it! Both of ya!” Both stallions broke their glaring match and looked over at the origin of the new voice.

Applejack stood there, glaring at the two of them, like a teacher would to a pair of fighting colts. Those lovely features that they had discussed at length, that drawn them to her, were now locked in a look of pure anger and rage.

“Now Ah don’t know what yer tryin’ ta prove but Ah ain’t havin’ any of it,” Applejack pounded her hoof into the ground. “Now it’s clear that the two of ya’ll have been fixin’ ta court me, but Ah’m not the type a mare ta go on multiple dates with different stallions, so you two better pack it in.” Tiling her hat forward, the orange mare turned and walked away, leaving both stallions staring on.

For a few moments, the two courting stallions just stood there watching after her. A task that they had both thought would be simple had turned into utter rejection. Neither of them had dealt with rejection in so many years, but this was clearly not their fault. Both stallions turned and glared at one another again.

Not a word was exchanged as they stared. If it hadn’t been for the other they would be enjoying time alone with the mare that had been haunting their dreams at night, and now she was out of reach because of that jerk! Getting up slowly, both stallions walked in opposite directions. Neither was going to lose a chance to date Applejack. It was at that moment they knew…

They were at war.

Author's Note

Thanks for everyone's help so far! I hope to have a chapter up a week! I actually have written a lot of this story so far, and now just need to edit before I start uploading. I will also try to have a new chapter of Auction up soon!

Can I not go a story without bringing up Big Mac?

Chapter 2: Money is no Object

Chapter 2: Money is no Object

Chapter 2: Money is no Object

The sun slowly rose upon Sweet Apple Acres the next morning, pushing back the darkness that had overtaken the land and replacing it with warmth and light. As the sun rose in the early hours of the morning, so did Applejack by tradition. Ever since she was old enough to help work the farm, she had woken up with the sun each morning.

Raising her forelegs above her head, she let out a yawn as she stretched her hooves high towards the sky. Already her mind was pushing back the haze of dreamland, and was making a list of what needed to be done that morning by each Apple family member. She was also trying to put the memories of yesterday behind her as well.

What did they expect? Chasin’ after me like some kind of prize. Applejack gave a snort at the thought. Tryin’ to woo me and get me ta go with em’. Bet they jes’ figured me as another notch in the headboard. The thought disgusted her as she reached for her hat, that some stallions were only in it for the short term, and never the long term. Trying to push those thoughts from her head, she went on with her morning routine, making herself look presentable before going down for breakfast.

“Well the mare of the hour is finally awake,” Granny chuckled as Applejack made her way downstairs.

“What? Am Ah late or somethin’?” Applejack looked up at the old grandfather clock, but it showed that she was right on time to have breakfast before starting her morning chores. “Ain’t my birthday Granny, what are ya talkin’ about?” She questioned, turning into the kitchen. As she entered, she saw that Granny, Mac, and Apple Bloom, standing upon a chair, were all gathered around the kitchen table.

“Ah didn’t know ya could have two coltfriends at once,” Apple Bloom said, as she leaned forward to get a better look at whatever they were concealing with their bodies.

“What do you mean? Of course you can’t,” Applejack said, walking into the kitchen, straining to look over Big Mac’s hulking figure at whatever they were looking at. “Ain’t proper, makes ponies say bad things about ya,”

“But you do sis, they sent you presents this morning.” Those words halted Applejack in her steps. Not so much the idea of having two coltfriends, but the fact that she had presents. It was rare for her to get such things outside her birthday and holidays. Even then it was mostly items for the farm more than her. Pushing her way past Big Mac, she eagerly looked for her presents.

Sitting on the table was a bottle of wine and a box of chocolates. Applejack reached out for the wine, and started to turn it over in her hooves. “Cote de Nuit?” Applejack read out loud, turning the bottle around once more. As she did so, a small note attached to the bottle drifted to the table. Putting the bottle down, she picked it up the. At once she noticed the elaborate calligraphy and elegant writing on the small note

To my dearest Applejack. May you find the taste and aroma of this wine as beautiful and enticing as I find you.

Trenderhoof

Applejack had to keep herself from making a face at the sappy note, but still appreciated the gesture. Though she admittedly didn’t like wine all that much, she would have to ask Rarity over to figure out how good it was, or if it was one of those fancy pony things where if it tasted bad, it was actually good.

Turning her attention from the wine, her eyes landed upon the large red package of chocolates. The sheer size of the box took up most of the table, with a large label on it reading ‘Sugar Cloud Confectionary’. It also went on to advertise that inside the box were over two hundred pieces of chocolate, all crafted from scratch including some of their exclusive rainbow truffles. Like the bottle of wine, there was a dark yellow note that she reached out for. Unlike the other, the writing was much rougher, but had a small flare of its own at the end of every word.

To the filly that is sweeter than any piece of chocolate out there, maybe even pie!

Soarin

Applejack cringed slightly as she read the note. It seemed that Soarin believed that the way to a mare’s heart was much like a stallion's, through the stomach. Then again, it was not like she didn’t enjoy the occasional sweet.

“Ah’m so happy fer ya Applejack!” Granny said, wrapping her hooves around Applejack and giving her a tight hug. “Findin’ yerself a pair of stallions that are willin’ ta compete over yer affections.” Applejack struggled for breath as Granny Smith hugged her, for such an old mare she still had strength in her that would put some stallions to shame. “And not only are they competing fer ya!” Granny added, letting go of Applejack, only to pinch her cheeks. “They’re rich stallions!” Granny laughed, letting go of Applejack and looking at the gifts on the table.

“Granny!” Applejack shouted, as she watched Granny looking over the gifts again, obviously having a better idea at how much they might have cost than she did.

“Does this mean yer gettin’ married soon?” Applejack rounded on her sister, her head cocked to the head slightly to the right, her golden eyes wide as she looked up for answers.

“No! Ah ain’t getin’ married anyti—”

“Ah would hope so!” Granny interjected, as she held the bottle of wine in her hooves. “First gifts like these? A.J, ya better get yer flank in gear! Never heard of two rich stallions goin’ after a simple farmer like yerself! Goin’ ta get maself some great grandfoals!”

“Granny!” Applejack’s face was turning a shade of red to match her brother’s fur. Not only had she rejected the pair yesterday, but now her grandmother was trying to get her married to one of them as soon as possible and start popping out grandfoals!

“That means Ah’m goin’ ta be a aunt, right?” Apple Bloom said excitedly, while she bounced up and down on her chair. “Ah Could help them get their cutie mark!”

“Apple Bloom!” Applejack turned to her sister again, shocked at her also joining in on the foal train with their grandmother.

“Ah’m sure ya can! Now Applejack, which one of em’ you like better? Gotta make sure the next generation of Apples grow up right!”

“Granny!”

“Ah wonder if they will be a colt or a filly?”

“Apple Bloom!”

“Don’t worry! Ah’m sure that they’ll have plenty of em’!” Applejack looked back between her grandmother and sister as they discussed her future foals and what each one of them would look like. Looking for any way out of this horrific nightmare of a morning, her hopes landed upon Big Mac, who was making his way out the backdoor.

“Mac!”

The red stallion turned around slightly, a hint of a smile upon his face. “Eennope” he said as he quickly vanished.

Applejack groaned at the thought of how the morning would slowly drag on with the constant nagging of Apple Bloom and Granny behind her, and tried to stay focused at the task in front of her.

--

“Special delivery!” Applejack was broken from her thoughts when she heard the familiar voice of Ponyville’s mailmare, Derpy Hooves, coming from the sky above. Looking up, Applejack was just in time to see Derpy crash into one of the many trees surrounding the property and slowly tumble down, hitting almost every branch.

“Yer alright there Derpy?” Applejack was already halfway to the grey mare when she started to push herself up, shaking the leaves out of her mane.

“Yep!” She laughed, reaching into her mail sack already as the farmer got closer. “So far I’m doing great! Only hit three trees today!” Derpy said, pulling out a clipboard and pushing it towards Applejack. “Sign here!”

Applejack glanced down at the clipboard and then to Derpy. “Do Ah have a package? Don’t remember orderin’ anythin’ fer the farm.” Normally, packages only came to the Apple’s Farm when they needed new equipment, and it would always be delivered to the farm house not out in the fields

“Huh? I didn’t know you used jewelry for farming,” Applejack’s head snapped around as Derpy pulled out a velvet case, a ribbon and note attached to it. In a blur of movement, Applejack had already signed for the package and was taking it from Derpy. She barely heard the pegasus ask what it was, her entire attention focused on the small box and the elegant paper with Applejack written on it in a flowing font.

She would never freely admit it to anypony, especially to those like Rarity or Rainbow Dash, but she did enjoy simple jewelry. One could blame her time with the Oranges that she had developed the affection. A simple necklace, an earring, just something that she could wear while working without it hindering her.

Looking over the box, her eyes glanced over the note that was written in the fancy cursive precision Trenderhoof used.

No diamond, ruby, sapphire, or pearl could ever match the shimmering of your eyes. No shred of gold could even compare to the fields of gold that is your mane. Simple words could never compare to your overall beauty.

Trenderhoof

Applejack had to suppress a cringe at the elaborate and unnecessary note, but all the same it was a sweet note that left her cheeks slightly red. The idea that somepony would buy special gifts just for her was still foreign, but even such a note could not help but make her smile slightly, and feel a bit of thrill.

Holding the box she slowly started pushing up the lid, biting her lip in anticipation as she could only wonder what contents laid inside.

She gasped in shock at the shimmering necklace inside. It looked as though it belonged in a museum. It was a golden latticework, studded with gems in a shimmering wave of colours and hues.
There was a note tucked under the necklace, Applejack raised an eyebrow and laughed when she read it. As I said, no single gem could ever match your beauty, but perhaps these may help come close. Pulling the necklace out, she was startled by the weight of the necklace and the multiple jewels that were hanging off of it.

Sweet Celestia! How is anypony supposed ta work with this thing on? She laid it back down in the box and closed the lid.

“Ooh! That’s pretty!” Derpy said, already getting ready to fly off again. “Well you have fun with your coltfriend!” Derpy giggled, as her wings gave a mighty flap and sent her flying right into another tree. “Whoops!” She giggled again, before flying off towards the clear sky. Applejack just shook her head as she watched the mailmare take off, before looking back down at the box.

The gesture was nice, but impractical for her. She could never think of a time when she would wear it. If anything it would be a hindrance to her work, more something Rarity would wear instead of her. Putting the box in the cart she was pulling around for supplies, she started to make her way back towards the outer fields to see if Mac needed help. However, before she could get more than a few feet a gust of wind swept past her, nearly knocking off her hat if she had not held onto it.

Above her, a dark pony in a blue and yellow outfit flew by her above the trees before taking a hard right and turning back towards her and slowing down to come in for a landing. Even from a distance, Applejack could recognize that the figure was Thunderlane, one of the many pegasi that had been training with Rainbow Dash at the Wonderbolt’s Academy.

“Howdy there Thunderlane! What can Ah help ya with?” She asked, watching as the stallion landed in front of her and shook his head.

“Hi Applejack,” Thunderlane groaned, pulling off the goggles and trying to catch his breath. “I actually have a delivery for you,” Reaching into one of the few pockets of his Wonderbolt uniform, he produced a small envelope with her name on it. Applejack looked at the card for a second.

“Let me guess, Soarin?” Thunderlane merely chuckled as he gave the envelope to her.

“When I left he was still pacing back and forth,” Thunderlane said, giving his wings a light flutter as he got ready to take off again. “Never seen him so nervous, kind of funny!” At those words, Thunderlane gave a mighty flap of his wings and went shooting high into the sky and back towards Cloudsdale.

As he flew off, Applejack started to tear the top off of the envelope. She felt like she should be a bit ashamed, having two stallions fighting for her affections, but it did feel kinda nice! Pulling out the piece of paper she began to read.

This might not be the most creative of gifts, but I hope you enjoy it all the same! I hope to see you soon and show you the world!

Soarin

Applejack let out a slight laugh, just reading those words she could already guess what her gift from the pegasus was. Reaching into the envelope, she pulled out nine pairs of box seat tickets for the next Wonderbolts show that was coming out, along with first class train tickets. She had to give the stallion points, he did think of her friends and family.

Unfortunately, she would not be able to go to any show soon with getting the farm ready for apple bucking season. Even with Big Mac in full health his year, there was much work still to be done. She would probably give the tickets to Rainbow Dash, along with her apologies. Putting the tickets in the box with the necklace, she went on with her chores for the day, but with a noticeable skip in her step.

--

“... so after recess Cheerilee started ta teach us about multiplication. Scootaloo and Sweetie didn’t really get it, but Ah thought it was kinda fun!” The Apples were gathered around the table listening to Bloom’s day. Before them was a mixture of apple based foods and drinks, exactly what they needed after a hard day's work.

“Sounds like ya got yer brothers smarts when it comes ta math thankfully,” Granny laughed, patting the broad shoulder of Big Mac, Applejack just gave out a grunt at the comment. “Aww hush yerself, don’t get all huffy because ya can’t be good at everythin’,” Granny said waving her hoof at Applejack.

Big Mac just stayed his stoic self as Granny talked, till the sound of the tea pot whistling. As she left to fetch it, Mac stuck his tongue out at Applejack as he wrinkled his face. Apple Bloom covered her mouth to suppress a giggle as Applejack smacked the table.

“Granny! Mac’s makin’ faces at me!” Applejack said in mock-annoyance, causing more laughter from the youngest Apple, as Mac’s face went back to being stoic.

“Now don’t be makin’ things up just because yer not good at math,” Granny said, as she returned, not even looking up at the arguing siblings. “Besides,” Granny sat back down, waving her fork at Applejack. “Marry one of ‘em rich stallions and ya don’t gotta worry about math!” Applejack let out another groan as Granny just chuckled.

“Ah’m not gonna marry a stallion fer their money Granny,” Applejack took a bite out of her supper. “Don’t like havin’ them gettin’ me all this stuff either. Seems like Ah’m playin ‘em or somethin,”

“Hush yerself child,” Granny said quickly, waving a hoof at her. “Nothin’ wrong with havin’ stallions fightin fer ya,” she said laughing a bit as she eyed Applejack. “Ah remember when Ah was a young mare, stallions would always be tryin’ ta get a date with me. Ah wasn’t as prude as yer bein’ Applejack and went out on a few, and them stallions were somethin’!” Granny laughed, making the two older siblings cringe. “Why, Ah remember this one fella, nice as can be! But when we got back ta his place, oh was he naugh—”

“Granny, not in front of Apple Bloom” Mac’s deep voice chimed in just before Granny’s story would cause any other nightmares for the night.

“Huh? Why not in front of me? Ah’m a big pony!” Apple Bloom said, getting up on her hind legs and looking over at her brother.

“Trust us Bloom. None of us are big enough ponies fer that story,” Mac insisted, before turning his eyes towards Granny. “Right?” Granny just let out a slight huff before turning back to Applejack.

“Besides, Ah’ve seen how yer eyes lit up seeing all of them gifts,” Applejack’s face grew hot at the comment. While the gifts had been silly or impractical, she didn’t mind getting them.

“You think stallions are goin’ ta fight over me Granny?” Apple Bloom asked, sitting up a bit.

“One day they will,” Granny said, before turning over to Big Mac. “But no way yer ready fer that, and Mac here will make sure of that,” Big Mac just rolled his eyes as he took a sip of cider, having long ago learned not to get involved in these kinds of arguments. A stallion could never win in them.

As Bloom pouted slightly, Applejack and Granny shared a laugh at the idea of Mac having to chase young colts off the farm. Before another word could be said, there was a knocking at the front door that caught all of their attention.

“Who could that be at this hour?” Applejack asked, as Mac got up from the table to answer to check.

They could all hear Mac’s large hooves pound against the wooden planks as he walked down the front hall, followed by the squeaking of the front door as he opened it. Applejack strained her ears to hear who was at the door. She could make out Mac’s baritone voice and that of another stallion she did not recognize. A few minutes later Mac came back into the dinner table with a large basket in his mouth, the contents hidden by green wrapping paper with red apples on them.

“That from one of them stallions?” Granny asked, eyeing Applejack as Mac placed the basket next to her.

“Eeyup.”

“Aww, yer so lucky!” Apple Bloom moaned, placing her chin on the kitchen table.

Applejack just stared at the basket, her mouth slightly open. It was easy to make out the tops of several bottles through the wrapping paper. Like all the gifts thus far, there was a yellow note on it, to which she grabbed first to find out which stallion had bought it.

The more I thought about it, Wonderbolt tickets are probably not the best gift. They almost seem cheap you know? I hope this makes up for that mistake!

Soarin

“So which stallion is it?” Granny asked, leaning forward, placing a pair of almost comically large glasses on her face.

“Soarin,” Applejack was already ripping the wrapping paper. Once the last of the paper was removed, all members of the Apple family leaned in closer to see what kind of gift a rich pony would buy.

Inside were bottles of expensive looking cider, each from a different part of Equestria, several bars of exotic chocolates, but what was in the middle of all of it was what really caught Applejack’s attention.

There, sitting in the middle of all of it was a little brown teddy bear wearing a black cowboy hat, and a red kerchief around his neck, with a sheriff badge on a black chest. While the rest of her family looked over the other gifts, Apple Bloom grabbing some of the chocolates, Granny exclaiming over the cider to Big Mac, AJ could not help but look at the bear. Something about the little bear made Applejack forget about everything else in the basket as she picked it up.

Looking into the light brown eyes of the bear, it took every ounce of her strength not to hug the bear right there. She was too proud of a mare to do such a filly-like act in front of her family, but she just loved the stuffed bear. At once, she felt her heart warm up towards the blue Wonderbolt, as the simplicity of the gift outweighed all the other gifts combined.

“Well Ah’ll be! Some of these ciders are from Braeburn’s farm!” Granny laughed, holding one of the bottles up the light for her to read better. “Why, this one is older than him! Must be worth twenty thousand bits at least!”

“Eeyup!” Mac chimed in, holding another bottle of cider in his hooves. He scanned over the other bottles, his eyes slightly twitching as he looked them over. “Reckon this basket is worth close ta eighty thousand bits of cider,” Granny gave out a low whistle before turning back to Applejack.

“Ain’t it a bit early for these sorta pricey gifts?” Mac piped in, only to get a light smack on the back of the head from Granny.

“Hush! Ain’t no such thing as too early. Besides, at the rate yer courtin fillies Ah’d be lucky ta be a great grandmother when Ah’m a hundred and twenty years old!” Mac just groaned, rubbing the back of his head while Granny looked at another bottle. “How about we crack one of these puppies open! Never thought Ah’d have a cider older than me,” Granny got out of her chair and started to make her way to the kitchen when there was another knock on the door. “Oh? More competition? Get the door Mac! Don’t want them ta see her playin’ favorites”

As Granny laughed to herself, Mac silently obeyed his grandmother’s wishes and made his way back to the front door. All the while Applejack kept holding onto the bear, barely registering the world around her, lost in its brown eyes.

Like before, the only sounds heard from the front hall were the loud steps of Macintosh’s hooves as he walked, and the murmuring of voices as he accepted whatever gift was to come next for the sought after mare. A short time later, Mac reappeared in the kitchen with a plain wooden box.

“Hmm… not as fancy as the last,” Granny noted, watching Mac place the box right next to the basket that was missing a few more bars of chocolate.

As Mac took the candy away from Bloom, Applejack approached the newest gift, her new little friend now wrapped in one hoof. She felt like a filly on her first day of school, not wanting to go without her favorite toy.

Getting closer to the box, AJ’s eyes fell upon a small white card attached to the seemingly plain box. If it was not for the unique writing, in which was her name, she would have never guessed it was from Trenderhoof. From all appearances, it was a very plain and simple box, not that unlike the ones they used to hold apples in. Picking up the card, her she began to read what words her second suitor had chosen to capture her heart.

When it comes to art, wine, food, and classical literature many ponies believe I am the best. However, my ear for music is not as keen as others. To my ears, it just sounds like noise, but to you I can only imagine it as beautiful as your voice is to my ears.

Trenderhoof

In those few lines Applejack felt her cheeks heat up. It was not often that someone complimented her voice, and calling it beautiful no less was a special kind of charm. Nudging the box open with her nose, she could not wait to see what kind of music Trenderhoof had found for her.

“By the stars! How did he know Ah liked them!” Applejack could not help the smile growing on her face as she saw the first cover in the box full of records. The record was one that she had heard her father play many times when she was a filly.

She could remember leaning on him as they sat in the living room after he had finished work on the farm, and how he used to sing off key just to make her laugh. A few tears threaten to break through as she flipped through the records, each one bringing forth some kind of memory of her filly days.

“Ah remember that one,” Mac’s voice gave Applejack a light shock, as she had not noticed that he was now looking over her shoulder and looking into the box. “That’s the album Pa used ta put on anytime family was over,” Applejack looked down at the cover, a pony was sitting on a barrel strumming a banjo, She remembered how their father would sit in the same exact pose and strum his own banjo to drive their mother insane.

It did not take long for a record player to be brought into the dining room and the sound of country music began to radiate from the player. Albums were switched one after another, filling the home with familiar songs again as the Apple finished their supper with laughs and memories that left a warm feeling in all their hearts, but none so more than Applejack.

But like all good things it had to come to an end, as the time came when little fillies should be in bed. As Mac carried the sleeping form of Apple Bloom up to her room, Applejack let her hoof trace over the box that Trenderhoof had given her. Most of the albums had been out of print for years, and would have cost a small fortune each to get.

Smiling, she reached into the box and took the album that her father had listened to so often. Holding it tightly in her mouth, she carried the album upstairs with her; as well as the teddy bear on her back.

Stepping into her room, Applejack laid the teddy bear from Soarin on her bed, and then the album on the gramophone next to it. As the needle fell upon the record, Applejack could not help but feel a surge of warmth spread throughout her body as the music reminded her so much of her father.

Sitting down on the edge of her bed, she took her hat off and placed it on the hook near by before reaching for a small brush, running it across her tail. Memories flashed before her eyes as she remembered her mother brushing her hair for her as the family sat in the living room; all gathered around the music relaxing from a long day of work. Mac would be sitting close to their father, watching him closely if he was fixing something or playing along with the musc. Either way, he would be explaining to Mac how he could fix it himself, or how to play the banjo. Then there was Granny, sitting in her rocking chair, knitting foal clothing for the recently announced newest addition to the Apple family.

The memory was one of the last ones she had of her family all together and happy. She missed those days, and tried not to dwell on them. The music, however, pulled it all back and it filled her with love instead of sorrow.

After brushing out the few knots in her mane and cleaning her teeth Applejack pulled back the covers of her bed and crawled in. She then pulled the little sheriff bear in close to her chest and nuzzled it. Something about the little toy had captivated her. Applejack considered herself a proud and independent mare, but that didn’t mean she didn’t like being treated like a filly once in a awhile, something this bear had provided. Giving the bear a light kiss on the head, she let out a yawn before closing her eyes, letting the music lull her to sleep.

For once in her life, she had stallions battling for her attention, and she was loving it!

Author's Note

I hope you all enjoy! Make sure to leave a comment if you can, I always love reading them! Thank you to docontra and Themaskedferret for all of the edits and feedback!

Chapter 3: Woes of Love

Chapter 3: Woes of Love

“I hate this so much!” Applejack shouted, slamming her head against the table, causing many of the dishes and cups to jump upon contact. She sat at one of the many tables inside Twilight’s castle, surrounded by her friends. It had been a month since the two stallions had started their war over her, and now it felt like they were fighting their war on her.

“Now Darling, it can’t be that bad,” Rarity interjected, dabbing a napkin to her lips. “You have two of the finest stallions competing for your love. I’m not ashamed to say I am a bit jealous,” Rarity giggled before letting out a sigh.

“How is it even a competition?!” Rainbow shouted, taking off from her chair and hovering next to Applejack. “Hello! Soarin is the Co-Captain of the Wonderbolts! How can that puffy dork stand up to that?”

Rarity merely chuckled, causing Rainbow’s ears to swivel around. “What’s so funny?”

“Darling, Soarin might be a Wonderbolt, but he is simply out-classed,” Rainbow glared at Rarity as she talked, oblivious to the glare that Rainbow had fixated on her. Rainbow gave a snort at the answer before landing on the table, knocking over a few glasses.

“Rainbow!” Twilight hollered, a purple aura already grabbing rags and napkins to clean up the mess.

“Out-classed? In what way?” Rainbow asked, folding her forelegs over one another and glaring at Rarity.

“Oh where to begin?” Rarity asked, her voice dripping with sarcasm, irritating Rainbow more. “For starters he is one of the most well known ponies in all of Equestria. Why, with a simple wave of his quill he has made and destroyed careers. Ponies have found his writings to be some of the best in the world, the way he can captivate a reader, making them crave more! Oh it's simply marvellous!” Rarity squealed, fanning herself with her hoof as she talked.

“Take it down a notch will ya?” Applejack deadpanned, watching as Rarity seemed ready to melt just thinking about the stallion.

“Forgive me Applejack, but he simply is a fascinating stallion by all accounts,” she gushed as her eyes seemed to take on a dreamy demeanor. “Why just talking to him must be captivating,”

“Like you would know.” Rainbow shot, “Did he even look at you when he was last in town?” Rarity’s expression changed instantly, glaring at the cyan pony on the table.

“Right. Well, if his professional work is not enough, just remember how many famous ponies he knows, all those parties and dinners he could get you in. And, besides being a good looking stallion, he is rich.” Rarity said, giggling into her hoof.

“Please!” Rainbow Dash shouted, “Soarin is rich as well, and by far one of the hottest stallions in all of Equestria! Every pegasus has dreamed about him asking them out!” Rainbow laughed, puffing out her chest.

“Oh? So have you also dreamed about him asking you out? Showing up out of the blue in full Wonderbolt uniform, telling you how awesome and amazing you are?” Rarity chimed in, her own magic grabbing her tea.

Rainbow’s face lit up like a fire, her eyes going wide as Rarity spoke. “Sh-shut up! I’m too awesome to think about sappy things like that!” She sputtered, giving her head a hard shake. Trying to banish all thoughts of a uniformed Soarin approaching her. Smiling that devilish smile like the one in the poster she owned, pulling down his goggles to look at her, asking her to fly with him.

Rarity merely laughed at the reaction before turning back to Applejack. “But really, why are you complaining? Any mare would kill to be in the situation you are in.” Applejack merely groaned, looking up at all her friends, dark circles under her eyes from a lack of sleep.

“Trust me, the grass ain’t greener on the other side in this little spat. Ah mean when it started Ah enjoyed it. Never had that much attention before and Ah’d be lyin’ if Ah didn’t say I loved getting presents. But after a week or so, the two of ‘em started ta go nuts!” Applejack lamented, leaning back in her chair. “One mornin’ Ah come down ta find somepony Ah never met before cookin’ breakfast fer mah family. Turned out ta be Soarin’s personal chef that he had sent over to make breakfast fer all of us,” Applejack groaned, rubbing a hoof against her forehead.

“That doesn’t sound too bad,” Fluttershy said meekly, holding her own cup of tea as she strained to see around Rainbow Dash who still sat on the table.

“It wasn’t, not till Trenderhoof caught wind of what he did. Next thing Ah know, some of Celestia and Luna’s personal cooks were there preparing our meals for the next few days!” All those gathered looked at one another as Applejack spoke. Each one of them had the same look upon them, trying to understand the meaning behind Applejack’s words, except for Pinkie Pie who looked excited.

“Oh that sounds super duper cool! I bet they know how to make the best cakes, pie, cupcakes, donuts, ice cream, ice cream cake…” Pinkie kept naming off all the sweetest treats she could think of. Rarity just cleared her throat slightly, but Pinkie did not let up.

“Well Applejack, I guess that could be a little much but…”

“That was just the start!” Applejack snapped, cutting Rarity off. “From then on each one of them has been tryin’ ta outdo the other anyway possible. If one got me a dress from the best dressmaker in Manehattan, the other would get me a dress made by the best dressmaker in Equestria! Then one day Ah walk out ta find that Trender had written his love fer me in the sky with the help of some weather ponies. Then, not ten minutes later, Trender’s message is gone and Soarin and some other Wonderbolts drew mah face in the sky!” Once again, Applejack slammed her head into the table and groaned. “They have even gone and bought me charriots, blimps, and even made plans ta put a pool in the back. They’d even used their influence ta have ponies come work on the farm! Soarin sent some Wonderbolt hopefuls ta do some work as well!”

“Blimps? Chariots? Darling why would you ever say this was a bad thing?” Rarity asked, holding a hoof to her chest, as if to slow her rapid heart beat. How she would love to have stallions doing this for her, working so hard to show their love to her!

“You have to be the luckiest mare in Equestria!” Rainbow added in, as she thought about all the gifts that stallions would bring if she and Applejack were reversed. She was mostly thinking of all the Wonderbolt stuff she would be able to get.

“Lucky? Ah haven't had a moment ta myself while workin the fields!” Applejack spat, glaring at the two. “And what kind of work can Ah get done with them two cluttering up the fields with this junk? Ah want a stallion that knows me, and not showering me with pointless gifts ta show they got cash! Ah don’t care about none of that!”

For a few moments, nopony talked as Applejack sat there, rubbing her temple with her hooves, muttering incoherently about the two stallions. What was just supposed to be a nice lunch with friends had turned into Applejack venting all of her built up aggravation.

“What does the rest of the family think?” Twilight finally ventured, using her magic to finally lift Rainbow off the table and back into her chair.

“Oh don’t even get me started! Granny just keeps goin’ on about how she is so happy that two rich stallions have shown interest in me, and Ah got ta pick one soon. Talkin’ about how she’s not gettin’ any younger and she wants some great grandfoals soon.” Applejack lamented, causing a shudder to run down the spines of those gathered at the idea of a Granny Smith demanding more Apple ponies. “Bloom is all jealous about the attention Ah’m a gettin’, and won’t talk to me none. Then Mac doesn’t even seem to register any of it, goin’ about his chores.”

“Have you, you know, told them to stop?” Rainbow asked, her wings ruffled from not being used for awhile. “Tell them it's getting on your nerves or something.”

“You think Ah haven’t tried that? Those two keep blaming the other, saying that it's their fault that this is going on. Then they try to suggest a date to get the other to back off,” Pushing her hat up she gave out a deep sigh. “Ah just don’t know what ta do”

“You might not believe this Applejack, but I know what you are going through.” All heads turned towards Twilight, who was putting a bit of sugar in her tea.

“Really? What stallions have gone nuts for an egghead?” Twilight gave a huff at Rainbow’s comment, her eyes closed as she stirred the sugar into her tea.

“Well, this eggheadwas crowned a princess, and with that came many suitors.” Twilight placed her spoon down as she began to explain. “Nobles of different families sent their first born sons hoping to gain political favor, high ranking military members did as well. There were even some suitors from outside of Equestria,” Twilight gave a groan as she remembered some of those.

“Trust me Applejack, as bad as this all seems you don’t have actual honor duels being fought over you. There was this one stallion from Roanssia, Iron Curtain I believe, who sent me a bottle of vodka proclaiming he had fought and defeated all other suitors for me, making him the strongest and most deserving. Then to top it off, he actually came to Ponyville once and taught a colt to solve his problems with violence! The brute.”

Twilight shook her head as she brought the tea up to her lips. The memory of that moment still haunted her at times, as did all the therapy she had to help with for the two colts involved.

“I kind of understand as well,” Once more, all heads turned towards the voice, only to find a hunched over Fluttershy, her face half hidden behind her pink mane.

“What?! I can believe the whole Princess thing brought stallions to Twilight, but how did you get them to fight over you?!” Rainbow shouted, her wings propelling her into the air so she was above everyone else there. “Seriously! I am the most awesome pony in Equestria! Why are no stallions fighting over me?!”

“Oh hush, you will have your day,” Rarity said, her aura wrapping around Rainbow’s tail and pulling her back down into her chair. “Now this was from when you were a model, yes?” Rarity asked, leaning in. Her face betrayed her intentions, she was relishing in all these untold stories of her friends’ love lives.

“Yes… and no. I mean, there were a few that were sending me flowers and gifts in the mail,” Fluttershy squeaked, her face turning a bit red as she remembered. “And I really did like it as well Applejack. But then when they actually came to ask me out, well…” Fluttershy swallowed hard as she looked around. “Discord is a bit protective of his friends… I still feel so bad about what he did to Braeburn…”

“What did he do to mah cousin?!” Applejack slammed her hooves on the table as she heard a member of her family and Discord in the same sentence. She had still not forgiven the Lord of Chaos for what he had done to Big Mac.

“No- nothing!” Fluttershy stuttered, holding her hooves out as though Applejack would attack her. “He just talked to him I think. I’m not quite sure, he did the same thing to Bulk Biceps.” Fluttershy lowered herself to Applejack who still looked like she had the intent to kill. “I… I swear. I don’t know what he said… they just kind of ran off,” Fluttershy said, still cowering from Applejack’s glare. “I’m just saying, that Twilight and I know what you are going through.”

Applejack leaned back in her chair and gave out a sigh. “Ah’m sorry girls. Ah guess it’s all just getting ta me. It started off all sweet and nice. Now Ah’m wakin’ up ta find one of em’ has paid a team to put a pool in, another a waterfall. Soarin went and bought me an airship while Trenderhoof got me a chariot. Still, the craziest thing was when Trenderhoof had a statue built to look like me, and then Soarin got one made out of gold, to which Trender responded with gems and it went on like that…”

“Wait…” Rainbow’s eyes widened as she looked over at Applejack. “Are you saying that somewhere on Sweet Apple Acres there are statues of you sitting around?!”

Author's Note

Sorry for the short chapter! Things should be heating up soon and longer chapters to come! Thank you to docontra and Themaskedferret for all theedits!

Don't forget to leave a comment

Chapter 4: Seeking Favors

Chapter 4: Seeking Favors

Chapter 4: Seeking Favors

Big Mac gave a loud grunt as he pulled the last cart full of statues of his sister into the barn. After all the crazy shenanigans that had happened in this town, one would think the stallion would have grown used to doing odd jobs like this. However, something about storing statues that were made to look like his sister, made out of precious metals and gems, was just plain old creepy to him.

Next thing they need ta get AJ is a new barn ta keep all this in. Big Mac thought, leaving the cart in the middle of the barn. He would unload the rest of the statues later that night after he got done with all his chores. Exiting the barn, his vision was temporarily blinded by a flash of light blue.

The stallion took an involuntary step backwards, but he soon regained his composure; his face going back to its normal stoic self.

“Afternoon Soarin. Applejack ain’t here.”

Soarin stood a few feet in front of Macintosh, his mane windswept as always as he pulled down the pair of flying goggles he had on. Giving his head a good shake, he gave a big toothy smile to the other stallion as he took a few steps forward.

“Afternoon Mac! And I’m not here to see Applejack,” he replied, holding out his hoof to Mac. “I’m actually here to see you.”

“Sorry Soarin. Ah’m flattered ya find me as attractive as ma sister, but Ah’m good with mares” Soarin stared up at Mac, his eyes wide as he looked up into the stoic stallion’s face.

“Wha… no! It’s not like that! I am still trying to ask your sister out! Why would you—”

“Just yankin’ yer chain,” Mac said, walking right past the shocked stallion. “Guessin yer here about ma sister though, right?” Giving his head a good shake, Soarin started after the larger stallion across the dirt path to the orchard.

“Right. To be honest Mac I need your help with your sister,” Soarin said, catching up and walking beside Big Mac. “Nothing I seem to do is impressing her much, and I’m running out of ideas,” Sorin's head hung low as he walked next to the larger stallion. “It’s just so hard to buy gifts for her, you know? Just doesn’t seem like anything I get is good enough for her. Any ideas?”

Mac chewed on the ever present stalk of wheat in his mouth, never looking down at the stallion next to him.

Soarin swallowed a lump in his throat as he followed Mac like a lost puppy. He didn’t know much of Applejack’s older brother, except that he worked the plow on the farm and didn’t speak much. Though, if he had any insight on how to win the farmer’s affection, he would gladly take it.

“Have ya gotten ta know her?”

“Huh?” Soarin cocked his head in confusion as the other stallion kept walking. What did he mean by that? Had he gotten to know her? Of course he did! Why else would be seeking her attention if he did not know her?

“Have ya gotten ta know her?” Mac repeated, leading the two of them down the path from the farm.

“Of course I have! I know she is an apple farmer, that she makes some of the best pies in Equestria, she is an Element of Harmony, she is friends with Princess Twi—” Soarin was cut off when he ran into the outstretched hoof of Big Mac.

“You know of her, but ya don’t know her,” Mac said, looking directly down at Soarin, his green eyes locked on the pegasus. “Big difference there.” Soarin could feel the protective brother vibes coming off of Mac as he talked about Applejack. Soarin might be able to do daring stunts, race on some of the most dangerous tracks, and even backtalk Spitfire; but something about this red stallion put the fear of Tartarus into him.

Taking the silence as a cue, Mac started to walk down the dirt path again, not looking to make sure Soarin was following him. “Eeyup. Big difference in knowing of a mare, and knowing her.” Mac said, knocking Soarin out of his funk and catching up with Mac. “Ya might know all the outside stuff, but any stallion worth his salt would know the same. Don’t gotta look to far ta see that with you and Trender buttin’ heads like rams. But ma sister ain’t about material gifts. Sure, she might get mighty excited about them gifts showin’ up, but growin’ up we didn’t get too many presents meant just fer us. Don’t gotta look too far ta see her favorite one is that hat,”

Soarin listened carefully to Mac. From his time trying to court Applejack, he had been staying in Ponyville and had heard stories about the Apples, nothing but good things thankfully. But the one thing that everypony seemed to agree on was that Mac didn’t talk much, and yet here he was, giving Soarin advice about courting the mare of his dreams, even if it was his own sister.

“While that might be all and good, it won’t change squat about her feelins towards either of ya. Cause’ neither one of ya dolts know the first thin’ about her.” Mac seemed to be laying it on thick. Soarin could only hope that Mac was rooting for him, or that he was tired of all the gifts he had to clean up.

“So… what should I do?” Soarin felt less like a grown stallion at that point, and more like a younger brother asking his older brother for advice on asking the schoolmate he had a crush on.

Mac chewed on the stock of wheat in his mouth for a moment or two, trying to decide how much he wanted to help the desperate stallion next to him. “Well, gettin ta know her is ma only real advice. Try ta find what she likes, why she likes ‘em and such,” Mac said, looking up into the clear blue skies. “But, ta be honest, Ah’m not all that sure maself,” Mac confessed, earning a deep sigh from Soarin. “Believe it or not, Ah’m almost in the same boat as ya,”

That bit of information caught Soarin’s attention, his ears perking up to get every word spoken by the stallion. “Really?”

A very thin, almost unnoticeable, smile formed upon Mac’s normally stoic face. “Eeyup. Like you two, Ah’ve taken’ a shine ta a certain mare in town.” Now that was a bit of information that Soarin found interesting, and if he played his cards right it might get Mac to help him more.

“So what’s stopping you? From what I can tell it seems like every other mare in Ponyville would love to go on a date with you.”

“She ain’t like every other mare in town. Eenope. She’s one of a kind, doubt she would even know Ah existed if she weren't friends with AJ,”

Has a crush on of his sister’s friends? The dog. Soarin thought, now all he needed was to figure out who it was.

“What makes you say that?” Mac gave a weak shrug as Soarin followed him towards the small hills outside of town.

“Ah doubt Ah’m the type of stallion she is lookin’ fer. She’s livin’ life at high speed, takin’ any challenge thrown at her ta test her limits. Me? Ah’m just her friend’s brother that works the fields. Don’t need ta be a genius ta know Ah don’t got a chance with somepony destined fer greatness like her,” Soarin could see a change in Mac as he talked. His voice seemed to get more excited as he talked about the mare he was crushing on, before going back to his normal tone as he figured he had no chance with her. But that little exchange gave Soarin just the information he needed to figure out who this mare was.

“Mac, you're selling yourself short,” Soarin said, taking a few long strides to cut the bigger stallion off. “You seem to be a great guy in my book, and any mare would be lucky to have you, you just don’t have an in.” It was now Mac’s turn to look confused, looking down at the stallion that had been asking for his advice a few minutes ago.

“Ah don’t follow”

“It’s simple!” Soarin laugh, wrapping a wing around Mac and extending a hoof in front of them. “You have the exact opposite problem of me. I can get an in with almost any mare because I can get expensive gifts and I’m kind of famous,” Soarin gave a light laugh at his abilities, which only earned him a snort from the stallion next to him, as the mare he was trying to get in with was Mac’s sister.

“But! I don’t know what to do after that, you on the other hoof can’t get an in, but once you do Ah’m sure you can sweep that mare off her hooves!” Soarin proclaimed, letting go of Mac and taking a few steps back. “So, how about I get you that in? How about some box seat tickets to the next Wonderbolts show? Maybe some VIP access cards, and throw in a chariot ride there and back?”

Soarin had to give himself a pat on the back later, for the stoic pony he had grown to know was anything but stoic at that moment. His eyes were wide open, his jaw slightly agape letting the piece of wheat he always had fall to the ground. The gears in the work pony’s mind had come to an abrupt halt, and were trying to get traction again.

“Wha… Ah mean… could ya… Ah couldn't accep… huh?” Soarin’s smile grew as he watched Mac try to struggle with his words, just adding to the ego boost he was getting.

“Sure you can!” Soarin laughed, giving Mac a slight jab to the shoulder. “I’ll bring the tickets by tomorrow morning, and you can go ask Rainbow Dash out that afternoon!” Mac nearly jumped at the name, turning to face the smiling Wonderbolt.

“How did—”

“Please Mac, I might be a dolt like you said, but I can put two and two together to see who you like,” Soarin gave his wings a mighty flap, sending him a few feet into the sky. “Let’s call it even for the advice you gave me!” Soarin took in the image of the still concussed stallion below him, before giving his wings another flap.

There was work to be done.

--
“Ah don’t know Scootaloo, that sounds kinda dangerous ta me.”

“Well, do you have any better ideas?”

“Maybe something with map making? I have heard ponies getting cutie marks for that.”

“Ugh! That is so boring! We need something exciting!”

The Cutie Mark Crusaders were walking back from school in the late afternoon sun, their minds hard at work again trying to figure out a way to get their elusive cutie marks. The ideas getting wilder with every passing second, as ideas from the plausible to the impossible came up. As they walked, concentrating solely on how to achieve their marks, they did not notice a pony walking down the same path towards them.

“Oh! Maybe we can try something with love again? I mean, we didn’t exactly fail, we just got the potions mixed up,”

“No way! Ya know how long Ah was grounded after that? Or that month long detention? Not goin’ through that again!”

“Yeah! And we need to do something cool! Not mushy lovey dovey stuff!”

“Excuse me young miss, are you Apple Bloom?” The three young fillies stopped in their tracks and looked up at the source of the voice. Standing right in front of them was a dark brown unicorn in a green and orange sweater, puffy blonde mane, and glasses. “I was wondering if you would accompany me to—”

“Stranger danger!” Sweetie Belle shouted, as an aura of light green magic enveloped her horn before shooting forward, blasting the unknown stallion. The stallion had no time to react as the blast hit him square in the chest, sending him on to his back as Scootaloo and Apple Bloom turned towards Sweetie Belle, who was sweating slightly and taking in deep ragged breaths.

“Sweetie! Why did you ya do that?!” Apple Bloom cried, looking over at the fallen stallion who was laying on the ground groaning slightly.

“Remember? Miss Cheerilee and Twilight told us about the danger of strangers! I was afraid he was going to foalnap you!” Sweetie said, giving her head a light shake as she looked over the stallion. “Is he okay?”

Scootaloo, on the other hoof, was bouncing back and forth, her wings buzzing as she took in the sight. “Who cares! I want to know why you didn’t do that before?!” She shouted excitedly as the stranger started to push himself up. “Quick, Sweetie! Do it again!”

Sweetie blinked a few times before pointing her horn at the stranger again and started to concentrate on doing the same spell again. This time, however, only a few sparks managed to appear, nothing like the blast she had conjured before.

“He ain’t no stranger!” Apple Bloom shouted, stepping in front of her friends, before turning to the unicorn, who had pulled out a small mirror and was looking over his face and mane. “That there is Trenderhoof, one of ‘em bozos that have been courtin’ ma sister!”

“You mean the bozo,” Scoots said, crossing her hooves to stare at Apple Bloom. “Because the other is Soarin! And Rainbow Dash says he is the coolest stallion out there! No way he could be a bozo!”

“Nu-uh!” Sweetie cut in, taking a seat in front of Scootaloo, her head pointed up and her eyes closed, looking more like her sister in the current pose. “Rarity says that Trenderhoof is one of the most influential ponies ever! That makes him so much cooler than Soarin!” Scootaloo gave a low growl as Sweetie talked.

“I don’t even know what that is! Soarin is cooler because Rainbow Dash said so!” Sweetie turned to Scootaloo and took a step towards her.

“That means when he talks other ponies listen to him! Besides, you can be as cool as you want, but with no class you're a nobody!” Soon the two young fillies were butting heads, much like their idols had done in the past, and were shouting at one another.

“Soarin is better!”

“No he’s not!”

“Yes he is!”

“No!”

“Yes!”

“Trenderhoof is better!”

“If compared to mud yea! But Soarin is the best!”

“Trenderhoof is cooler because Rarity said so!”

“Soarin is cooler because Rainbow Dash said so!”

“Is not!”

“Is so!”

“Is not!”

“Girls!” The two arguing fillies turned towards the sudden voice that overshadowed their own to see Apple Bloom glaring at both of them. “Don’t matter what Rainbow or Rarity says, it's up ta ma sister!” She declared, still feeling a tinge of jealousy towards her sister, but that could wait. Turning her attention towards Trenderhoof, Apple Bloom took a deep breath to keep herself in check. “How can Ah help ya Mister? Shouldn't ya be off fightin’ fer ma sister’s heart or what not?”

Trender was patting himself off, getting the dirt off his sweater and fur coat. He could never live it down if anypony saw him in such a state, unless a certain orange mare was with him, then he would not mind getting dirty. Turning his attention to the youngest of the Apple siblings he smiled at her as he approached.

“Well my dear, I wanted your help in that matter.” Trender was at a loss as what to do. Never had he had so much trouble in gaining a mare’s affection. Anypony that was anypony knew of him, and that his written word carried power. He had started many careers with a flourish of his quill, and ended even more the same way. Yet, when it came to Applejack nothing he seemed to do impressed her much, and that birdbrain buffoon was not making the situation any easier.

That was when he came with a solution.

If he could not win Applejack’s affection on his own, maybe some inside help could sway the tide in his favor. He doubted that glorified flyer would have the sophistication to come up with a plan such as this, which was why he was destined to win this petty battle.

“Huh? What can Ah do ta help?” Apple Bloom questioned, tilting her head to the side. Trender merely chuckled at her reaction.

“Why my dear, you are her little sister. If you were to recommend a stallion to her, she would be more likely to choose that one.” Apple Bloom’s head stayed slightly cocked as she looked up at the grinning Trender.

Trender held back a sigh at the filly’s confusion. “To put it simply, I wish for you to put in a good word for me with your sister,” Trender said, trying to keep it as simple as he could for the young girls.

“So ya want me ta help ya cheat? That don’t seem all too romantic ta me.” Trender stared down at Apple Bloom, his eyes going wide behind his glasses.

“Yeah! Cheating is so un-cool!” Scootaloo declared, taking a stand next to Apple Bloom. “Cheaters are the worst! No one likes them!”

“But Scootaloo, didn’t Rainbow Dash cheat during the Iron Po—” Before Sweetie could finish, Scootaloo had shoved her hoof into her mouth, effectively silencing her.

“That is completely different!” Scootaloo shouted, glaring at Sweetie Belle. “No pony could prove it, so it never happened!” Before the two fillies could be rallied into another argument, Trenderhoof cleared his throat, loud enough to stop any further interruptions.

Trender rubbed a hoof against his temple. He was honestly hoping this would be easy, and able to secure a good word from the sister with just some nice talk. Taking in a deep breath, he started to go with Plan B.

“Now, I wouldn't say I am cheating. More of just ensuring, my victory,” Trenderhoof tried to put a positive spin on the situation, he didn’t plan on this. “Would it be cheating if I offered you something in return?”

“Isn’t that a bribe?” Trender’s face fell as he looked towards Sweetie Belle, who was rubbing her chin as if to rememberwhat the word meant.

“Is it?” Apple Bloom asked, turning to her. “Sometimes AJ offers ta get me ice cream if Ah do some of her chores. Ain't that the same thing?”

“Yeah! Dash has done that with me a few times. So is it bad?” Trender’s eyes lit up as the fillies started to discuss what a bribe was between them. This was the opportunity he was looking for.

“What I am asking is just like that,” Trender declared, catching the fillies’ attention. “If you put in a good word with your sister for me, I will get you all ice cream!” He could already see it now, the youngest of the Apples would tell her sister how much she liked him, and soon he would have Applejack all to himself, and that third rate flyer would be on his way back to Cloudsdale! It was all so perfect.

“Ah don’t know, seems like this is much bigger than ice cream. It’s gonna take more than that Ah think,” Trender’s face fell as he looked down at Apple Bloom.

Was she trying to haggle with him? He knew she sometimes worked the stand in town, but she was acting like an expert salespony. Swallowing hard, he could already feel himself losing bits talking to this filly.

“Okay then, what do you think would be fair?” Quickly, the three fillies gathered together and started to discuss the price in low whispers.

Trenderhoof tried to hear in on their conversation, but they were just keeping their voices low enough that only they could hear. Every once in awhile, one of them would look up at him, and then bend down low again to discuss with the other two. If he tried to step forward, all three of them would look up and wave their hoof at him to back up before discussing again. After what felt like several hours, the three fillies finally nodded their heads simoustanly and broke apart.

“Alright! We have come to a decision!” Apple Bloom declared, looking up at the unicorn.

“And what is that?”

“Fer puttin’ in a good word with ma sister of ya, in return we want ya ta get us skydiving lessons!” Trenderhoof felt his jaw drop at the declaration. He had been expecting candy, tickets to a show or fair, even straight up bits had crossed his mind. But skydiving lessons?

“Why do you want skydiving lessons?” Trender asked, his mind trying to play catch up with these three diabolical fillies. The three of them just looked up at him with wide smiles.

“Ain’t it obvious? We want ta get our skydivin’ cutie marks!” The way she said it, one might have thought there was a large sign behind them advertising it. Then, as crazy as it all might have sounded, it wouldn't have been the most expensive item he had purchased during this war.

“And if I do this, you will put in a good word?”

“Once ya deliver em’ tickets ta do it Ah will tell ma sister how nice of a guy you are!” Apple Bloom said, holding out her hoof to seal the deal.

Trender looked over the toothy smiles of the Cutie Mark Crusaders, trying to use their innocence to convince him to do whatever they wanted. With a groan, Trenderhoof knew he had already lost this battle.
“Fine, fine.” He agreed, tapping his hoof against Apple Bloom’s.

In the battle for love, bank accounts were the biggest casualty.

Author's Note

Thank you to Docontra, TheMaskedFerret, and Jake the Army Guy for the edits!

As always, I hope you enjoyed the chapter and please leave a comment below! Always nice to hear feedback!

Chapter 5: Granny Knows Best

Chapter 5: Granny Knows Best

Applejack rose with the sun as she always did, the next morning after her meeting with the girls, letting out a loud yawn and stretching her stiff limbs from sleep. She began her morning rituals, first making her bed and placed Sheriff Cuddles under her pillow. As much as she loved the little bear, she didn’t want any of her friends to find him, especially Rainbow Dash.

After that, she prepared herself for whatever gift the two knuckleheads had thought of the night before. Last night Soarin had sent over a large arrangement of flower, which Trender outdid by sending an even larger one. She didn’t know how the two knew what the other was sending, but the way they were trying to outdo one another at every turn was getting on her nerves to say the least.

Walking down the steps, she was just in time to see the red blur of Big Mac walking out the door to get a start on his chorus. It wasn’t that odd for him to get an early start on them, but only when he had something to do that day. Not giving it another thought she went to the kitchen, she didn’t need to get involved in what her brother did, what he did was his own business.

“Mornin’ Applejack,” Granny said, flipping through the pages of the morning paper. Apple Bloom sat right next to her still eating her breakfast. “What do ya want first? Breakfast or them gifts those love struck stallions brought?” Granny chuckled.

“Breakfast,” Applejack grumbled, as she sat down at the table and started to pull some of the pancakes towards her.

“Well yer in luck! Their one in the same this mornin’!” Granny laughed, as she put the paper down. “Them pancakes were a gift from that pegasus. Pony that delivered said they were made by some great chef or somethin’, Ah don’t remember. But their yer favorite, strawberry and chocolate chip!” Applejack smiled slightly at this, what mare didn’t enjoy their favorite pancake in the morning?

“And that other fellow had this coffee brought in from from somewhere,” Granny pushed a small cup of coffee towards Applejack and smiled.

“Uh… Ah usually have two cups of coffee ta start the day,” Applejack picked up the small cup, afraid she was to break it.

“Trust me sweetie, that stuff is stronger than ya think,” Granny said, looking out the window. “Why look at Mac work! Had an entire mug of the stuff and he’s workin’ like a locomotive!” Applejack craned her neck to look out, and nearly dropped the cup.

Mac was running back and forth like a train on fire. At the rate he was going, he might be done with his chores and Applejack’s before she could even get outside.

“Luna be blessed, what is in this stuff?” Applejack took a sniff of the contents and gave a light sneeze.

“Ah don’t know! But it got me feelin’ younger than ever before!” Granny laughed, as she picked up one of the small cups and downed its contents. “Either stallion you marry, gotta make sure they can get this!” Granny got up from her chair and started to make her way to the sitting room.

“Granny!” Applejack shouted, but he old mare didn’t pay attention to her as she left. Giving a sigh, Applejack looked to Apple Bloom who was just finishing her breakfast. “What do ya think Apple Bloom? Which one of em’ stallion do you like?”

Apple Bloom didn’t respond right away as she patted her napkin to her lips, almost causing the other to burst into a fit of laughter at the Rarity-like manner of the youngest farmer.

“Don’t got one yet, still waitin’ on it,” Apple Bloom got up from her seat as well, and made her way out to do her chores. “Might have one this afternoon,” Applejack raised an eyebrow to Bloom’s own behavior. Not only was she getting to her chores sooner than normal, the way she talked made her suspicious. “This afternoon?” Applejack repeated to herself, “What in tarnation has gotten into that girl?”

That morning’s incidents didn’t last long in Applejack’s mind as she got to work. It was the only thing that was keeping her sane these days, and as long as those two stallions kept their distance from that she could cope. That, and the little show of Big Mac hyped up on caffeine helped her through the morning. It was funny, yet odd, watching Mac move with such speed around the farm; if he went any faster he could give Rainbow Dash a run for her money. She chuckled and got down to doing her chores, still keeping an eye on her brother’s manic shape.

After working for most of the morning AJ sighed in relief as she finished checking the last tree of the orchard. With how fast Mac was working, the chores did not take as long as she had originally planned, and left only the checking of trees for her to do.

“Welp, that’s that. Time fer me ta take a break. Ah wonder what Macintosh got up ta?”AJ had lost track of her hyperactive brother once he slowed down and she moved deeper into the orchards to focus on her own chores. Stretching slightly, she started to trot down the familiar path back to the farmhouse, her stomach giving a low growl on the way back.

Laughing to herself, she picked up her pace slightly to see what Granny might have made for lunch that day. As she made her way, she looked up into the bright blue sky a few times. While the morning had been normal, as she had come to expect them, the afternoon had been surprisingly… quiet.

No mail ponies had come by, no Wonderbolts sent to deliver gifts, not one thing from either Soarin or Trenderhoof. One one hoof, it was a nice break from having to lug back whatever large and extravagant gift, or sending Mac to go get it. However, a part of her was disappointed in that neither one had sent her anything. Was it selfish of her?

Maybe.

She had grown, regrettably, used to it getting gifts from the two of them. A part of her did like receiving presents from the two stallions, even if they were impractical. Each day they would austone her, either with the sheer price of the gift, or how silly it was. It brought a certain amount of excitement to her normally dull life.

Still, it was nice to have a break from it all and let her fully concentrate on work.

Before long, Applejack was right outside the farmhouse, the heavy scent of cinnamon in the air, made Applejack’s stomach growl louder, and caused her to lick her lips. Granny must of have been in a good mood to make apple fritters that day, which in turn made all of the other Apple’s day all the better! Taking in a deep inhale of the sweet scent of her favorite food, Applejack entered the farmhouse with a skip in her step.

“Them fritters smells amazin’ Granny!” Applejack exclaimed, as she entered the kitchen, her mouth watering in anticipation of apple fritters. The elderly mare turned to her and smiled as she pulled them out of the oven, filling the kitchen with an even richer scent of apples and cinnamon.

“Well Ah’m glad ya think so,” Granny said, placing the hot fritters on the window to cool. “Unfortunately, ya can’t have any.” Applejack’s jaw dropped at these words.

“Whattya mean Ah can’t have any?” Granny just sat down in her chair and opened up a book.

“Exactly what Ah mean dearie. Ya can’t have any,”

“Why’s that?” Applejack had all but reverted back into a filly, being told she could not have a toy she wanted. It was torturous that Granny would make her famous apple fritters, and not allow her to have any knowing how much she loved them. Granny eyed Applejack over her book, and even with her mouth hidden, Applejack had the sinking feeling she had fallen into her Granny’s trap and she was smirking behind that book.

“Why?” She asked, looking back down at her book. “Why, its because ya haven’t chosen one of them stallions yet,” Applejack just slapped her forehead at this. “Once ya choose a stallion ta marry, ya can have some fritters.”

This was definitely an Apple Family plan to get a pony to do what you want. Make their favorite food, and tell them they can’t have any until they bend to their will.

“First off, Ah haven't even been on a date with with one of ‘em! And no way either one of ‘em would want ta get hitched right off the bat!” Granny merely shrugged as she flipped a page in her book.

“Didn’t stop yer grandpa and me,” As the elderly mare chuckled, Applejack rolled her eyes and sat down across from her.

“That’s different, besides Ah don’t even know which one Ah’d except a date from. Both of them are nice, and Ah wouldn't want ta break the others heart,” Applejack sighed, resting her elbows on the table, holding her head up with her hooves. “Ya know?”

Granny merely nodded as she flipped a page in her book again. “So yer heart ain’t tellin’ ya one way or the other?”

The question was one Applejack had been having run around in her head at night when she was trying to sleep. If she had to make a decision between the two right there and then, who would she choose? And if she was being honest with herself, both of them were not bad special somepony material.

Trenderhoof was a very smart pony, and showed interest and knowledge in what she did and loved. He knew of the rare types of apples in Equestria and beyond, different techniques farmers used to grow apples, and even went out of his comfort zone to find the music she liked. He could come off as a pompous jerk at times, but he seemed to have a maturity about him that recognized it.

Not a week later from his departure did Applejack received a letter from the stallion. She was tempted to tear it up and throw it in the fire, but she was nowhere near that heartless and read what Trenderhoof had to say. Inside, he wrote about how dreadfully sorry he was for his behavior, and that he wished to start a new with her for he did not want to end their relationships on such a sour note.

Then, if she was being truly honest, she did find him appealing. He was a good contrast from some of the other farmers that tried to court her here and there, he dressed well, took care of himself, and even if ponies hatted the glasses he wore, something about them did make him kind of sexy.

Then there was Soarin, if she was going for looks he outclassed Trenderhoof in every way. Sure, Applejack wasn’t a big Wonderbolts fan, or really a fan at all, all of her knowledge came from what Rainbow Dash told her; but she would be lying if she didn’t say that Soarin was a fine stallion too look at. He was well built, his eyes piercing, and that smile was unnaturally perfect. Everything about him seemed to be have sculpted to perfection. They were clearly gained from hard work, much like her own.
But there was more too Soarin than his good looks and fame, he was a goofball at times, doing things without thinking them out first, and apologizing over himself for it. He also acknowledged her skills, seeing her more than just a pretty face and respected her for them. She had never met a pony that worshiped her apple pies as if they were life itself. Besides, he was also the one that gave her Sheriff Cuddles, a testament that he was willing to do embarrassing things to get her attention.

“Ah just don’t know Granny,” Applejack finally said, looking to Granny Smith, almost pleading for that elderly advice that was supposed to get her through this. “Ah like both of em’. Sure they got their faults, but who doesn’t? Ah just don’t know who ta choose.” Granny merely nodded as she rubbed her chin.

“That is a tough question ain’t it? Ah’m glad Ah was never in yer hooves. Sure, Ah might have done some datin’, did a few reckless things in ma youth, but Ah always knew yer grandad had won ma heart long ago,” Granny sighed, as she put her book down. “Ah say ya need to really listen to yer heart. It will tell ya,”

Applejack merely groaned. Her heart was as conflicted like the rest of her. How could she possibly break one of their hearts deliberately. That was when the sound of heavy hoof steps broke her inner struggles, the hoof steps that only Mac could make.

Turning herself halfway in her chair, she looked to where the stallion would enter the room, she prepared to ask the stallion for his own opinion “What do you think Ma—” Applejack had to keep from falling over as she watched her brother walk into the kitchen.

Big Mac was no slob, but he was never one to be concerned how he looked after a day of work, but today was a something else. It was not hard to tell that he had taken a shower, for there was not a spec of dirt on him anywhere, and his mane and tail had been brushed til they shone. Applejack could even smell a bit of cologne coming off of him, something he didn’t use unless it was for a special occasion.

“Why Macintosh, don’t ya look handsome!” Granny laughed, watching her grandson enter the room. “Got a hot date or somethin’?” She asked, eyeing him over the book she was reading, causing Mac’s ears to flatten against his head.

“Or somethin’” Mac replied, moving his hoof in a circular pattern against the floor. Granny just laughed at him before closing her book.

“Why, Ah think yer fixin’ ta court a mare taday,” Granny Smith just smiled at the bashful Macintosh. “About time ya did! Now, tell me, who is the lucky mare?”

Mac just gave a sly grin to his grandmother as he ran a hoof through his mane. “Eenope!” Mac said, his grin growing as he talked. “Don’t want ya two to hurt her if she says no,” Mac chuckled as he made his way to the door.

“Course we would!” Applejack laughed, pounding her hoof on the table. “What kinda mare would think she’s too good fer ma brother?” Mac shook his head at her as he pushed open the back door with a low chuckle. “Oh! Before ya go Mac, mind if Ah ask ya somethin’?”

“As long as it’s not about who Ah’m courtin’,” Mac replied, half way through the door. “Shoot”

“Who do you like, Soarin or Trenderhoof?” Mac stopped at the question, turning his head ever so slowly towards his sister.

Swallowing a lump in his throat, he walked back inside and sat near the table. He sat there for several seconds, just staring at Applejack. She had seen him only do this a few times, when he really wanted to convey a point, and was choosing his words with care.

“Well, if Ah had ta choose between the two of ‘em, Ah gotta say that Soarin got ma vote,” Mac said, his voice low and resident. “And not because he’s a rich feller, they both are, but he asked me if it was alright ta court ya. Course its none of mah business, but it was an honorable thing ta do. He also seems ta want to get to know you.” Applejack just stared at Mac. Normally, his advice was very straightforward and helpful.

“What do ya mean by he wants ta get to know me?” Applejack asked, but Mac was already making his way out the door.

“You’ll see. Ah’ll be back later,”

“Mac! You git back here!” Applejack shouted, but Mac kept going on his way, trotting towards Ponyville to court some unknown mare.

Giving a snort, Applejack just sat back down as Granny resumed her reading. “Well, Ah guess that’s one vote fer Soarin,” Applejack mumbled, looking to the cooling fritters that she wanted so much and sighed.

“Aw, don’t fret darlin, you’ll work it out. Us Apples is tough, y’know.” Granny smiled knowingly at her granddaughter. Applejack looked up and smiled, if there was anypony she could turn to for advice it was her Granny Smith. “But don’t take too long,” Granny added, “Neither you or Ah are gettin any younger, and Ah want great grandfoals!”

“Granny!” Applejack shouted, as the elderly mare burst out into laughter. As she laughed, the scraping of hooves could be heard against the floorboards upstairs, and soon an energetic Apple Bloom bolted down the stairs and into the kitchen.

“Bye Granny! Bye Applejack!” She shouted, as she passed Applejack, only to be yanked back when Applejack grabbed her by the tail.

“Hold it there missy, what in the world got ya’ll so excited?” Apple Bloom turned to face Applejack, bouncing in place due to how excited she was.

“Scootaloo, Sweetie Belle, and Ah are goin’ to try ta get our cutie marks!” Applejack should have seen this coming, there were a few things in this world that would have her sister so excited.

“Alright, alright. What is it this time?” Apple Bloom just kept grinning at her and shook her head.

“Eenope! It’s a secret!”

“What is with everypony and havin’ secrets taday?” Applejack asked, looking to Granny who just merely shrugged.

“Don’t know, but Ah’m gonna be late!” Apple Bloom said, as she took off for the door again. Before she could open it, she came to a halt and turned back around. “Oh and sis, Ah gotta say Ah kinda like that Trenderhoof feller,” Applejack stared at her sister for a moment, before looking over to Granny who didn’t seem to register the sudden interest in one of the suitors.

“What makes ya say that Sugarcube?”

“Don’t know, he just seems nice.” Apple Bloom said, before throwing open the door and taking off to meet the other Cutie Mark Crusaders. Applejack just watched after her, while the screen door slammed shut again and the speck of yellow and red disappeared into the distance.

“Well that just be the oddest thing,” Applejack mused, “Now why would Apple Bloom say that?”

“Same reason that Mac there told ya ta pick Soarin.” Applejack raised an eyebrow at Granny’s answer.

“What do ya mean by that?” Granny set her book down and leaned forward in her chair. A smile spreading across her lips, a slight twinkle in her eyes.

“Ya really want ta know?” For a brief second, Applejack felt like she was talking to a card shark instead of own grandmother. Something about how Granny talked, the way she was leaning in, felt off to her.

“Course Ah do. Now what’s with and secrets? Why does everypony have a secret taday?!” Applejack shouted, leaning in as well to look Granny Smith in the eyes. “What is going on?”

Granny Smith chuckled as she leaned back in her chair. “Oh dearie, it’s quite simple. Both of em’ been bribed by those stallions ta put in a good word with you.” Applejack sat there eyes wide as she took in what Granny said. It felt as though her mind and body seemed to disconnect that that statement, as a chill rolled up her spine.

That cold feeling started to spread through her body as she tried to process what had been said. Not just one, but both Soarin and Trenderhoof, had the same idea of bribing members of her family to get her to return their feelings. Big Mac, who was always supposed to be the pillar of honor around the farm, and Apple Bloom, who was to be so innocent and sweet. The idea of both of them taking bribes for their own wants fueled the fire that was growing in the pit of Applejack’s stomach.

As much as the thought of the two stallions bribing her family infuriated her, The knowledge that they actually took them was even worse. Family was supposed to be one thing you could always count on, and no family took that as seriously as the Apples, or so she thought. She knew if anything like this happened to them she would never take bribes, no matter how splendid it might be, nothing was worth betraying family.

“Ah can’t believe it!” Applejack shouted, getting up from her chair and making her way towards the door. “When Ah find those two they're gonna be sorry! Ah’m gonna give Bloom such a tannin’ fer this, and fer Mac, Ah’m don’t know what but Ah feel sorry fer whoever he’s planin on askin, because he ain’t gonna look to pretty once Ah’m done with him!”

Before she could take another step towards the door, a cane came down blocking her way. “Now not so fast there,” Granny laughed, getting out of her seat as well. “Don’t be too hard on em’, taking a bit of the action ain’t no crime,” Granny said, ushering her away from the door and to the sitting room.

“What do ya mean? They betrayed me Granny!” Anger was rolling off of Applejack, the sheer audacity that her own kin would take payment to change her feelings towards a pony was just sickening.

“Oh hush Sugar. Didn’t matter what they said or did, Ah knew it wouldn't change a thing,” Granny said, a warm smile spread across her lips. “Yer a strong mare, and Ah know yer gonna figure out which stallion is best fer you. Don’t matter who they bribe, Ah know ma granddaughter is one tough mare, and she knows her own self best.” The anger that once was ready to explode inside of Applejack began to fade as she listened to Granny’s praise. Feeling a smile taking over her once enraged face, she wiped a tear that was threatening to fall.

“You mean that Granny?” Granny stopped Applejack before they entered the sitting room to put a hoof around Applejack and pulled her into a hug.

“Of course Ah do child,” Granny whispered, pulling her head down to give her a light peck on the forehead. “Otherwise, Ah wouldn't take their bribes as well!” Applejack did not have time to react, as Granny pulled her into the sitting room and forced her to look where her rocking chair would normally be.

But the old wooden chair was nowhere to be seen. Instead, there was a new rocking chair that looked like something out of a science fiction novel. The chair looked to be made out of some fancy metal, with large plush pillows on it, a cup holder on each side, a remote connected to the chair, and a foot rest that could pop out from underneath.

“Granny… what in the world is that thing?” Applejack finally asked, trying to understand the contraption in front of her.

“Its ma new rocking chair!” Granny said with a laugh, jumping into it. She instantly looked like she was melting into the plush pillows. “Yes sir! Those stallions were so desperate for a good word from me they agreed to get me anythin’ Ah wanted!” Granny said, picking up the remote that was sitting next to her. “This baby has a heated seat, massager, foot rest and a recliner built into it! And look at that! Ah can even have it rock on its own at any speed Ah want!” With that, Granny hit a few knobs on the remote and soon the chair began to rock back and forth, as a low humming of vibrations came from the chair making her sigh out in relief. “Eeyup! This chair is gonna keep me goin fer years ta come!”

Applejack just watched Granny cackling to herself as the chair rocked back and forth on its own. She was not sure what Big Mac and Apple Bloom had gotten out of these bribes, but probably nothing where near the cost of this contraption.

“Granny, which one of those damn fools got you this?”

“That pegasus!” Granny laughed, leaning back in the chair as she turned up the vibrations on the chair. “Oh thats the stuff… he was so desperate for a good word from yer sweet old granny that it was a piece of pie! That reminds me, that feller sure does love apple pie, though Ah’m sure there is pie he’d like better” Applejack’s face turned red at the comment, in both the embarrassment of Granny, and how she took advantage of Soarin like that.

“Granny how could you do that?” Granny simply laughed as she hit another knob on the remote that upped the speed of the rocker.

“Ain’t like Ah just did that ta him. That other fellow also came seekin’ favors,”

“Oh Granny! What did ya do ta him?”

“Oh hush yerself. Yer actin like Ah made them do this,” Granny said, as she enjoyed her rocking chair. “Go look in ma bedroom, you’ll see it,” Applejack swallowed hard as she stepped out of the sitting room, half afraid what she might find in Granny’s room.

Since Granny’s hip still gave her trouble, her room had been moved onto the first floor to make it easier for the old mare. It was a short walk from the sitting room to her room, but Applejack’s mind was racing with all the oddities that Granny could have had Trenderhoof buy for her. She could only shudder at the possibilities, and try to block them from her mind.

Arriving at the door to Granny’s room, Applejack took a deep breath trying to imagine what horrors that might hide behind the door. Pushing the door open, Applejack stuck her head inside and scanned the room.

Everything in the room had been changed. What was once a small but comfortable room, full of slightly worn furniture had been completely revamped. The shabby splintered floor had been polished to a mirror shine and was covered in an opulent looking rug that had such thick pile AJ felt as though a pony could get lost in it.

The battered and chipped dresser had been replaced with a large armoire, made from some exotic looking red wood, carved with delicate apple blossoms and half-opened to show Granny Smith’s simply outfits hanging inside.

AJ’s eyes slowly looked over to take in the space the small simple bed Granny had slept in for as long as Applejack could remember. In its stead was a bed that seemed more something a Camel Sheik would lay his head in, large wooden posts brushed the ceiling, holding up rich red fabric tied back to allow AJ to see a mattress and pillows that looked as though they was made of cloudstuff and covered in glossy silk sheets that oozed comfort.

Applejack could see how Soarin might have been tricked by Granny, but Trenderhoof as well? Either Trenderhoof was not as smart as she had thought he was, or Granny was more manipulative that she could imagine. The sheer cost of everything in the room must have cost as much or even more than the rocker that Soarin had bought.

Returning to the sitting room, Applejack found Granny had taken out her knitting and was working on a dark green scarf for Big Mac to wear in the winter. There was nothing like Granny’s knitting to keep a pony warm during the winter, and normally ponies didn’t interrupt her while she was working on them. Though with what she had done, Applejack felt entitled to have her say.

“Really Granny? Do ya have any idea what that probably cost him?” Granny looked up from her knitting, with a smile that would make Sombra himself tremble in fear of.

“Of course Ah do sweetie! But Ah ain’t about to tell you that.” With that Granny broke into another fit of laughter. From the very beginning she had been enjoying the war between the two stallions, and Applejack could only imagine the boredom that would plague Granny if she was to choose a winner.

Instead of trying to fight the point any longer, Applejack made her way over to the couch in the sitting room with every intention of taking a nap. Though it was only pass midday, the combination of farm work and emotional turmoil had taken a toll on her body and mind. Crawling up onto the nice soft couch, Applejack curled up and pulled her hat over her eyes. Maybe after a nap, the world make a little bit more sense to her.

With a deep sigh, she closed her eyes and waited for Luna to take her off to dreamland.

“You ignoramus! Let go of me!”

“I don’t even know what that is!”

Applejack’s eyes flew open as the sound of shouting came from outside the farmhouse, as well as the sound of scuffling hooves, blasts of magic, and the flapping of wings. Granny didn’t even seem to take notice of the commotion as Applejack jumped to her hooves.

“What in tarnation?!” Applejack shouted, as she made her way over to the front door, as the sounds of shouting grew louder.

As she opened the front door, she was greeted by one of the most outlandish sights she had ever seen. Fighting in the dirt like colts at recess were Soarin and Trenderhoof. Both stallions were covered in dirt from rolling around and had a few cuts and bruises from doing so. Trender’s sweater had been torn in a few areas, and Soarin’s feathers looked more than a bit ruffled.

Soarin did have an obvious edge over the writer, for he was an athlete and probably been in his fair share of fights. At the moment, Soarin seem to have the upper hand over the weaker unicorn. He was holding Trender in a rear neck choke, keeping Trender from using his magic.

However, Trenderhoof had put up a fight as Soarin’s right eye was looking a bit puffy and had swollen up slightly, and he was not ready to back down just yet, as he slammed the back of his head into Soarin’s face breaking free of the hold.

“What are you two doin’? Stop fightin’ right now!” Neither stallion seemed to register that the mare they had been pulling every stop for was shouting at them. Insead, the pair were back at trying to pin the other.

Growling in frustration, Applejack was not ready to stand there and let the two idiots beat on each other on her property. Turning to go back inside, she was going to go get her lasso and hogtie the two fools till they calmed down.

Before she could take a step inside, a bright red object zipped past Applejack’s head and hit Trenderhoof in the side of the head sending him to the ground. AJ turned around to see Soarin standing over the unicorn laughing when another red object shot past Applejack and found itself lodged in the laughing pony's mouth effectively silencing him.

“Now that’s no way ta court a lovely young mare, such as ma granddaughter,” Granny walked out onto the porch, looking down at the two stallions. Trender had managed to get back up, but Soarin was struggling to get the apple out of his mouth. “You two have been fightin’ fer her affections for the better part of two months and neither of ya are any closer ta winnin’ then you were in the beginning,” Granny spoke as she marched down the steps towards the two stallions.

“All ya two have done is worked her up into a fizzy. Now Ah’ve had ma laugh at all of this, but its time ta put matters ta rest.” Granny eyed the two stallions, who were now standing at attention for her. “Each one of ya is takin’ her on a date, and dependin’ on which date she likes best that stallion will be the winner! And there’ll be no more of this messing with each other nonsense. If I find out one of you messed with the other’s date you’ll feel my hoof on your behinds!”

“Granny!” Applejack shouted in protest. She started to make her way down the steps when Granny turned to her.

“You had yer chance missy,” Granny said, her voice stern and full of conviction. “We played it yer way, and if we keep goin’ these two are gonna be broke and Ah’m gonna die before Ah see ma first great grandfoal!” A shade of red appeared on the cheeks of all those gathered there at the elderly mare’s words as what she said sunk in. “Now then!” Granny barked, breaking the stallions out of their stupors. “Which one of y'all would like the first date?”

Soarin stepped forward, his green eyes blazing with determination. Winking up at Applejack he turned to Granny to speak.

“Mmff!” The apple that Granny had thrown at him was still stuck in his mouth. His eyes going wide in a mixture of panic and embarrassment, he desperately tried to spit the apple out but it was stuck on his teeth.

Chuckling beside him, Trenderhoof walked right past Soarin and up to Granny Smith. “I would be honored to take your lovely daughter out on a date first,” he said, reaching for Granny’s hoof and kissing it. Granny merely giggled and she fanned herself once he let go.

“Stars above. If AJ doesn't want you, Ah’d sure take ya!” Granny laughed, causing Trenderhoof to shudder slightly, but kept up his smile. He then looked up at Applejack and gave her a wink as well.

“I shall pick you up for our date this Friday around nine,” he said with a smile, “Would you be terribly offended if I sent a dress for you to wear?”

Author's Note

Sorry for the late posting! Mid-terms are kicking my ass! This is not the full edited version due to lots of editors being out of town, like they have lives outside editing stories... please don't hate me.

Next chapter might take a bit longer than normal since I have not fully written it yet. The reason why all these chapters are done was because I started at BronyCon and Ferret is quite... persuasive about getting people to write... she is a scary Canadian.

Thank you all for reading, and please leave a comment! I love those!

Chapter 6: Preparations

Chapter 6: Preparations

Chapter 6: Preparations

“Golden Retriever, make sure to get reservations at Le Pomme D'or. I don’t care how busy it is. Tell them to find me a table if they want to make sure my reviews stay positive,” Trenderhoof ordered, walking around his lavish penthouse in Manehatten, overlooking Central Park. “And to make sure it is the perfect distance away from the violinist, I want to hear the music, but not so much that I can’t hear my date,” stopping in a mirror, he examined his face. “Set up an appointment at Chouchoutez et de Rajeunir. I want the earliest time for tomorrow, make sure they know it's me.”

A bespectacled grey colored earth pony with a light gold mane followed Trenderhoof around his penthouse like a lost puppy. She was holding a piece of parchment in front of her as she constantly dipped her quill into an ink jar to write down everything Trenderhoof said. The continuously scratching of the nib was the only indication Trenderhoof had that his assistant was keeping up with his demands.

“Yes sir, I will get on that right away,” Retriver said, as she followed Trenderhoof into his bedroom. “What time shall I have the limo come to pick you up?” Trender took a moment to look himself over in the full length mirror. Luckily that buffoon of a pegasus had not left any permanent marks on him.

“I want them here at eight, right on the dot. Make sure they also have a chilled bottle of Apple Redd Cider waiting in the limo as well.” Trenderhoof continued to examine himself in the full length mirror, trying to find any minute detail he might have overlooked that would be in need of fixing before his date.

Dating was nothing new to him. In fact, he had written several articles about the subject, and how a stallion could get any mare he wanted as long as he was a gentlecolt and understood the world around him; and had the right connections. If there was one thing in this world Trenderhoof had, it was connections.

This time, however, things were very different. This was no ordinary mare he was taking on a date. No, she was beyond any other mare he had ever met! She was not like the other mares he had dated, or wanted to date him. She was something far more special. A self made pony, just like himself, who used every skill and talent she possessed to be the best. How his heart sank when she wanted nothing to do with him, that he poured out his very heart and soul to her in that letter just for the chance that she would not hate him, and he could try to win her heart.

“Of course sir. Will you be wanting to go through your mail now or later?” a collection of letters in varying shapes were proffered with a hoof.

Trender picked the pile up and flicked quickly through them, murmuring to himself as he did. “Fanmail, fanmail, cheque, yet another request to investigate a clockwork toy shop in some place called Pasofino.” He paused to snort at the letter. “Honestly, do I really seem like a stallion who has time to play with toys? Hmm, Applejack might enjoy them, perhaps if I can ascertain what sort of toys she had as a foal. More fan mail, a magazine copy of my latest review, hmm, they didn’t catch my best side. That’s the last time I let the locals recommend photographers. More fan mail, ooh, one of my sources says that things are getting exciting in Bitaly. Hmm, I suppose I could see if there’s something exciting in those quaint little ruins. Fan mail, cheque, oh, another complaint saying I ruined some little pizza place in Bayroan, what was it again? Slice of Pie? Oh well, not everyone can appreciate my genius.” Trender floated the letters back to his assistant before focusing on his reflection again, tugging out his ever-present comb to fluff his bangs slightly.

“Yes sir, shall I fill out the fan mail as normal?” Retriever asked, taking the mail back and sorting it out to what he had deemed important and not important. “I have also taken the liberty of sending that dress to her this morning, the one you said brought her eyes,”

“Good, good” Trenderhoof replied, as he tugged on his mane for a few seconds longer, making sure it was in its proper place. “And yes, do whatever it is you do with them. You can sign them for me as well, I am far too busy to deal with those trivial things,” Putting his comb away, he turned to his large walk in closet and hit the light switch.

As the lights came on, rows of the most luxurious and extravagant clothes were on display. Each article of clothing was tailored specifically for Trenderhoof, made by the greatest designers in Equestria as gifts for his positive reviews. Running his hoof across them, he looked for one that would show off his good looks, physique, and show an air of sophistication and culture about himself, but nothing that would overshadow the beauty of his date that night.

“What to wear, what to wear,” Trenderhoof mumbled to himself, as his hoof ran across the fine fabrics. “Hmm, there is that silk caftan made by that lovely up and coming designer from Bovaland, they did do a lovely job with the embroidery, but then I’ll have to explain why it’s a formal robe and not simply ‘beachwear’ and that gets tedious. Hmm, perhaps that lovely fitted blazer with the Tamarack lace trim. No, wait, blast, it’s at the cleaners after that after party Pony Parada threw. Hmm, Perhaps that serape Rhinestone and Jet Black crafted, though I think they’re on their way out and they certainly don’t deserve my help propping up their poor efforts.”
Trenderhoof kept talking to himself, his eyes scanning his extensive wardrobe in search of the perfect outfit to compliment his date.

“If I may propose sir, your dark blue blazer from Gieves and Hawkins? It was just returned from the tailors and it would be a good match to the dress you sent to miss Applejack.” Trenderhoof looked up from the row he was examining and at the protective bag that was hanging just in the back of his closet.

His aura surrounded the bag and brought it over to him, unzipping it on the way. Once it was in front of him, Trenderhoof examined the contents inside and a wide smile spread over his face. “Golden, remind me to give you a raise.” Trenderhoof said in glee, making his way over to the dressing room leaving the mare behind.

“Third one this month” Golden Retriever said, in a voice barely above a whisper as she shrugged, before following the excited stallion to the dressing room knowing he would want her opinion.

--

Soarin groaned out as he laid on one of the beams of the Apple barn. His hooves were covering his eyes, while his wings were hanging loosely off the sides of the beam. For the last few days he had been in his cloud mansion, racking his brains about what to do with Applejack on their date, but nothing seemed to be good enough for her. Each one of his ideas didn’t seem to be good enough for her. In short…

He was a nervous mess.

He had been on plenty of dates, but anything he could think of doing he was sure Trenderhoof would do it first; making Soarin look like a cheap imitation of that pompous jerk! He needed something to give him an edge, to show how he felt about her, but he was not quite sure what that was. He would ask some of the other Wonderbolts for advice, but most of them would just laugh and torment him more for being a lovestruck fool.

That only left one pony for Soarin to turn to for advice.

Unfortunately, when Soarin went to seek that pony’s advice, he had found him skipping around the barn humming to himself.

Big Mac was positively giddy with excitement as he bounced around the farm. Soarin could only assume that he had secured a date with Rainbow Dash, and looked like he was ready to walk on clouds with how joyful he was. It was almost unnerving to see how full of life the normally stoic pony was. When Mac noticed Soarin entering the barn, he grabbed the blue pegasus and pulled him into a bone crushing hug, babbling and thanking him for getting the tickets.

He was the exact opposite of how Soarin felt. While he was nervous and apprehensive, Big Mac looked like he could break out into song at any second.

“Mac, seriously, I need an idea here!” Soarin groaned, pushing himself onto his side and looking down at the happy stallion. “I’ve been on dates with celebrities, royalty, hell I took Spitfire’s mom on a date once; but your sister… I just don’t know what to do!” Soarin rolled off the beam and fell a few feet before spreading his wings, slowing his descent and landing gracefully on a stack of hay bales.

Much to Soarin’s disappointment, but not too much to his surprise, the big red stallion kept skipping around the barn, putting tools away, shoveling hay, and whatever other chores he had to do that day. The pegasus was better off talking to a brick wall at this point with how Big Mac was acting, and it would probably be less disturbing. Giving a growl of annoyance, Soarin looked for anything around the barn that might help him get Mac’s attention.

“Oh hey, Rainbow! Fancy seeing you here,” Soarin said, looking up at the open window of the barn.

At once, Mac stopped skipping around the barn and whipped around to where Soarin was looking. His green eyes scanning frantically for any trace of the rainbow maned pegasus that he had finally gotten a date with. What would she think of him if she saw him acting the way he was? Would she laugh at him? Cancel their date for being too ‘un-cool’ to be seen with him?

His eyes darted around the barn in search of the mare, but there was no trace of her vibrant mane or sky blue coat. The only other pegasus there was Soarin, who was smirking at the dumbfounded stallion. Giving a low grunt, the large earth pony shook his head and sat down, looking up at his sister’s suitor.

“Alright, ya got ma attention,” Mac said, watching Soarin’s smile grow larger at his victory. “So what were ya bellyachin’ about?” Soarin’s smile fell at these halting words.

“Wait, you seriously weren’t listening to me?!” Soarin cried out, his wings falling just like his smile.

Mac just shrugged at Soarin’s disappointment, “Sorry Pal. As ya know, Ah finally got a date with Rainbow Dash,” Mac said, a delirious smile finding its way back onto his lips. Luckily for Soarin, the smile didn't last long. MMac knew if it was not for the stallion sitting there he would have not gotten the date he was so excited about. “What can Ah do ta help?”

Soarin sighed out, as he collapsed down on the bale of hay he was on. “That’s the million bit question… I just don’t know what to do on my date with your sister!” He lamented, placing his hooves over his eyes, seeing if the darkness would have answers for him.

Mac simply nodded, rubbing his chin with his hoof. “What would yer perfect date be?” Soarin pulled his hooves from his eyes, and looked down at Soarin.

“What?”

“What would be yer perfect date?” Mac repeated, looking right up at Soarin. “Tell me what would be yer perfect date. What would you want to do on it?” Soarin cocked his head as he looked at Mac, not sure where the country stallion was going with this. Without any other source of advice, Soarin took a breath and thought about what his perfect date would be.

“Well… I guess a dream date for me would be going out to the movies and seeing one of the newest action ones! I love going to those, and just gorging out on popcorn! From there, we would go get something to eat; popcorn never seems to fill me up. We’d probably go to The High Flyers Pie shop. It’s a great little place that’s dedicated to all sorts of pony flight record holders. Everything from the fastest wonderbolt to the longest sustained earth pony flight. They’ve got headshots all over and they make the best milkshakes and hayfries. And their pies, oh man, I never thought there could be a better apple pie ‘til Applejack sold me that pie at the Gala. After that, we would probably walk around downtown and hit up a few bars and see where the evening goes from there,” Soarin grinned sheepishly and rubbed the back of his head with a hoof.

Mac listened to Soarin’s full dream date, giving a nod here and there to show he had been listening to him. As Soarin came to the end, Mac gave one last final nod, before he began to rub his chin once more. “So that’s it?”

Soarin blinked. “Well, yeah, what else should there be? I mean, the last thing I want is to go to some big fancy snobby restaurant.” Soarin gagged. “I hate that stuff. It’s so boring, everyone’s so obsessed with appearances and Spitfire always yells at me when I ask for pie. I mean. c’mon, why would you want to eat a single spinach leaf and a blob of paste when you can have hot tasty pie? Heck, I’m happy sitting out in a field eating corn on the cob or something.”

Once again Mac kept on nodding. His face didn’t change in the slightest as he looked up at Soarin, keeping that perfectly stoic look that unnerved the pegasus. He had to wonder if Mac had to practice that look to become so good at it. Mac stayed silent for a few more moments, scratching his chin while looking out into space.

“Ya know what ma ideal date is?”

“Huh?” Was Soarin’s intelligent answer to Mac’s question. His jaw was slightly open as he looked at Mac. Anytime he talked to this large work pony, it seemed that he liked to talk in riddles or around the topic, never straight forward.

Taking Soarin’s silence as compliance, Mac started to fill in the gap in conversation. “Gotta say, ma dream date would be after chores are done fer the day, so close ta supper. In the interest of not scarin’ them we’d go out somewhere so that the family don’t interrogate them. Maybe goin’ on a nice quiet stroll after supper around the property, explain’ about the tree’s and how the harvest goes. Most of all Ah’d just like ta listen, hear what they gotta say about things. From there, Ah’d have em’ home at a reasonable time, and hope that Ah get a chance fer another date,” Mac concluded, giving a slight nod as he looked at Soarin.

Nopony would ever claim, even himself, that Soarin was a love guru, or had any kind of advice to help another stallion get a date. He mostly just relied on his status as a celebrity and looks to get him dates and what to do on them. The one thing that he knew was to adjust the date so it was one the mare would like, and would want to go out with him again. After all the advice the big stallion had given him, Soarin could not figure out why that was his dream date.

“Mac, not to be a downer or anything, but that sounds like the worst date to take Rainbow Dash on,” Soarin said, swallowing a lump in his throat, afraid of what the other might do. Sure, he could get away from him if things got physical, but he was not really certain what he might tell Applejack about him. “As far as I know Rainbow is a mare for action and adventure. Taking her on a walk around your farm sounds like the worst thing for her. Yeah, she might like talking about herself but really? You think that is going to impress her?”

Soarin was beyond confused. All this time Mac had been harping on this ‘get to know her’ stuff, and he didn’t even seem to know the first thing about the mare he was taking out? Jumping down from the tower of hay bales he had been on, Soarin started to pace in front of Mac, confusion evident by the wrinkles in his face as he tried to understand.

“What kind of date would that be? She would be bored to death! That is not the kind of date you take someone like Rainbow Dash on.”

“Ah know.”

Soarin stopped his pacing, looking over his shoulder he saw the larger stallion sitting there with a half smile. Once again, he had fallen into a trap set by Mac and was once again going to be taught. Turning to fully face Mac, he sat down looking up at him.

“You know?”

“Eeyup.”

Soarin simply nodded. “Yet… you’re going to take her out on that date?”

“Only if Ah don’t want another,” Mac said simply, that half smile still evident on his face. “Ah’m no fool Soarin. Ah know the kind of mare Ah’m takin’ out and plan on takin’ her out on her dream date.” Mac grinned at his proclamation, still not believing that he had a chance to take that famous mare out on a date. Looking down at Soarin, it was still clear that he was missing the point that he had been trying to make.

Giving a deep sigh, Mac once again tried to help Soarin on his date with Applejack. “It’s about takin’ them on their dream date. What is it they would like ta do?” Mac said simply. “What Ah understand, Rainbow’s dream date would be goin’ to a Wonderbolt show, seein’ her favorite flyers perform. On the way to the show talk about the Wonderbolts, who broke what record, the latest in Wonderbolt stories, stuff like that. Once there, she would like ta keep talkin’ about the Wonderbolts, pointing out historical parts of the stadium they were in that day, and all the other trivia she knows about them. From what Ah heard, she wouldn't be the kind ta eat before or after the show, she would want ta have some fried food from the concession stand and watch the show while eating.

“After the show, she would not want to talk about anythin’ else but the show, attempting some of the stunts herself on the way home. From there, Ah’m not quite sure what she would want ta do, but it would be all up to her.”

As Mac finished his tale, he glanced down at Soarin again. “Yer not takin’ yerself out on a date, yer takin’ Applejack. So think what she might want ta do, what she would like, and Ah’m sure ya’ll find the answer,” Mac lightly punched Soarin on the shoulder before getting to his hooves.

Mac leaned forward, stretching out his back, the sound of bones cracking from not being used sounded like a string of fireworks. Proceeding to roll his neck, more crack and snaps emanating from the work pony, Mac started to make his way to the barn doors. “Yer welcomed ta stay here fer as long as ya want, just make sure AJ doesn’t see ya. She’s still givin’ Bloom and Ah a tongue lashin’ about accepting bribes,” Mac said in a low chuckle.

“Hold up!” Soarin shouted, turning to face Mac once again. “What does Applejack like? What would she want to do on a date?” Soarin asked, taking a few quick steps towards Mac. “Like, what's her favorite food, song, is their a certain outfit she likes stallions in?” Soarin’s face had gone from a confused stare, to one filled with desperation and uncertainty, causing the farmer to give another laugh.

“Oh, Ah know the answer to all em’ questions,” Mac said, as a look of relief came over Soarin, finally having the inside track over his hipster opponent. “But, Ah ain’t gonna tell ya,”

“What?” Soarin shouted, as his placed his hooves on Mac’s broad shoulders and started to shake the stallion, or at least tried, for Mac was as sturdy as any oak tree. “Why not?”

Mac simply grinned as he looked at the manic face of the supposed ‘Most Desirable Bachelor in Equestria’. “Because,” Mac simply said, “How weird would it be if ya knew everythin’ about her on the first date?”

Author's Note

Thank you all for sticking with this story! I am hoping the next few chapters will be something special. A big thanks goes out to, The Masked Ferret , Docontra and a new editor Desertbat for all the edits!

The Masked Ferret would couldn't help but to insert a few references. To what? I have no idea. But hey, it works and she says they are great stories! If you want to know what they were to, go message her. I am sure she would be happy to tell you.

Makes sure to leave a comment below!