In Which Scootaloo May Or May Not Hurl Rarity Into The Sun
Scootaloo scrunched up her muzzle and glared at her cold, misshapen, slushy, dripping, slumping mess. The smeared, black eyes of her dying snowpony had more life in them than her attempt at snow sculpting. Ugh!
Rarity clicked her tongue in a not-so-silent admonishment, but gave the filly a halfhearted grin when they caught each others' eyes. “That was a nice try, darling. It's definitely got some juice to it, but I don't think you're giving your best effort. Perhaps you'd like to work on the snow fort again?”
Scootaloo's previous effort consisted of a blob. If it could speak, it would say, My only existence is suffering. Please, be merciful; kill me...
“Rarity, this isn't going to work.” Scootaloo ripped the carrot nose from her aborted snowpony and splatted it on the ground in a slushy crater. “I can't get a weather cutie mark by playing with snow that's already fallen. I need to be up in the sky!”
Rarity dropped her glassy smile and sighed, looking up at the flat, gray cloud cover. “Scootaloo, darling, you'd have more success if you weren't going about this all wrong. You need to slow down and pay attention to what you're doing. This warm spell's made the snow sticky, which is ideal for sculpting, but you can't work with stuff that's already turned into slush.”
“What's the point? It's all going to get buried once they fix the temperature and drop this month's backlog of snow.” Pointing up at the clouds, Scootaloo winced. She pulled at her soft, fuzzy ears. “Gah! Cherry Berry already said that we could use her balloon, so why aren't we going up there, already?”
Rarity stiffened. “Now, Scootaloo, I'm a bit sensitive when it comes to heights. I've had enough of nearly falling to my death to last a lifetime. That kind of thing could get under the skin of anypony. If you insist on working with clouds directly, I do know of a place where Rainbow Dash stashed a fog bank. I'm not going flying and that's final. This will have to do.”
“Fine. See if I care. It can't go any worse than this.” Adding emphasis to Scootaloo's statement, her partially-sculpted blob blorped and burbled, oozing into a sloppy pile of mush.
<>.<>.<>
“See, dear? There it is.” Rarity pointed across a chasm at a little puff of white sticking out of the mouth of a cavern on the sheer cliff face.
Scootaloo walked up to the edge and peered down at the raging river far below. “You do know that I can't fly yet, right?”
“Eh-heh. Don't worry. With my magic I think I can—” the cloud vanished in a puff “—whoops. Darn, I forgot just how delicate those things are.”
“So...” Looking up with big, glossy, weapons-grade cute, puppy-dog eyes, Scootaloo asked, “Can we go flying now?”
Rarity grimaced and her eyes darted around. “Maybe we can forget about this whole 'weather cutie mark' and do something else? Would you, perhaps, like to make dresses?”
“Uh...” Scootaloo raised an eyebrow. “But you said that I can't play with your stuff until pigs build a rocket ship and launch themselves into the sun.”
“W-well, perhaps I've changed my mind?”
Pressing her lips together, Scootaloo's mouth formed a thin line. She tapped on her little chin. Then, she rubbed her hooves together and an evil grin crept up her face. “Sweet! I'm going to use up that entire roll of sparkling gold fabric which you won't let me touch with a ten foot pole to make lots and lots of crude socks!”
“Crude socks?” Rarity's left eye twitched.
“And then, to give them that authentic feel, I'm going to embroider them all with gravel!”
“Gravel?”
“Yep! When your super-expensive, very delicate sewing machine starts spewing black smoke, that means that it's working correctly, right?” She wrapped her tail around her legs and grinned.
Rarity gulped and grit her teeth. “Um, I know you have your heart set on this, b-but let's go back to that pig thing, okay? We can take that balloon ride like you wanted instead.”
“Aw, okay.” Scootaloo pretended to sound dejected, but her continued huge smile completely betrayed the fact that this was exactly what she'd wanted in the first place.
<>.<>.<>
“Now, Scootaloo, when it comes to traveling in a balloon you have to prepare for all sorts of contingencies.” Rarity unfurled a list that fell down to the ground, rolled past Scootaloo, up out the basket, and down the street into Ponyville. “Ahem. First, we have to inspect the canvas to ensure that there aren't any microscopic tears or imperceptible split seams. Then, we have to carefully weigh each corner of the basket to ensure that all of the weight is distributed evenly. We don't want the basket to tip over, after all. After that, we'll have to inspect all of the ropes, giving each and every one a tensile-strength test. We also need to ensure that the knots are all prim and neat-looking. After that, we'll need to...”
While Rarity droned on and on, Scootaloo moaned. “Rarity, the basket's already been inspected and whatnot. Can't we take off?”
“Darling, I keep telling you that you can't just rush into things. Taking the time to properly prepare is essential for success. Now, where was I? Ah yes, step thirty-six: ensuring that the balloon's canvas and your flight scarf are color-coordinated. If we are going to do this flying thing, we need to do it in style. Step thirty-seven...”
Scootaloo smacked herself in the face and yanked on her mane. They'd been sitting in the basket for hours. She gnashed her teeth, then stood up and bucked the mooring. The basket shook, and the restraining rope's fancy butterfly knot slipped free. Without anything holding them down, the pink balloon shot up.
Rocking back and forth, Rarity shrieked, turned green, and shrieked again. “Scootaloo! What have you done!? We didn't even get halfway down my exhaustive list! We could tip over! The canvas could tear!”
“Seriously?” Scootaloo rolled her eyes. “Nothing's going to happen. Can't you just enjoy the ride?”
”I am serious! The whole basket could unravel!”
“This? Unravel?” Inspecting the woven wicker basket, it looked just as solid as ever. In fact—“Gah!” The basket's lurching motion forced a straw up her nose.
“Everything could randomly explode!”
“What?” Scootaloo tried to deadpan while also holding her face. Mostly, that made her look like she was trying not to sneeze. “Now you're just being silly.”
“This is terrible! This is horrendous! This the most awful, imaginable, outcome!” Rarity swooned and collapsed on a fluffy, burgundy, gold-embroidered couch.
Scootaloo blinked. She stopped rubbing at her face and a string of snot trailed to the floor when she pulled her hoof away. “You packed a couch? On a balloon ride?”
The basket's motion smoothed out and Rarity peeked out from under her hoof. “Well, if I'm going to be falling to my death, I'd at least like to do it comfortably.”
Rolling her eyes, Scootaloo leaned over the edge and flexed her wings. “Whatever. I'm just glad that we're finally—ack!”
Yanking with her magic, Rarity dragged the filly by her tail. “Scootaloo! Don't you dare lean out the basket like that! Didn't you see how much we were swinging before? You could fall!”
“Oh come on! Rainbow Dash never cares when I lean over the edge!”
Narrowing her eyes, Rarity leaned down and glared. “Don't you dare bring her into this! I happen to be a unicorn and not a pegasus and I can't jump out and catch you if you fall. Try to think before you do things for a change!”
Scootaloo snorted. Not to be outdone, she pressed her face up against Rarity's; their eyes locked in mortal combat. “So? Not having wings didn't stop you from grabbing me with your magic, did it? Plus, I might not be able to fly but I can still slow myself down before hitting the ground. I bet I could jump out there right now and not even get hurt!”
“DON'T YOU DARE!”
“You are so lame! You have no idea how to have fun at all! All you've done is nag and complain and—”
“I've done no such thing! You're the one who's been completely unreasonable with all of your impulsive, brazen brashness! If you can't ever stop and think about what you're doing, then you're never going to get your cutie mark!” Rarity snorted and stomped her hoof, jarring the basket.
Scootaloo winced as if she'd been hit. She grit her teeth and shook with fury. “Oh yeah!? Well I'm going to—”
Chill air struck them as the balloon broke through the snow-laden cloud layer. Rarity's teeth chattered and she broke eye contact to grab her scarf.
Scootaloo thwacked Rarity's horn and hopped on the edge of the basket. A wildly undulating sea of white spread out in all directions. Puffs and curls rose up like hooves at a sports stadium doing 'the wave.' “I'll show you! I don't need your help at all! I'm going to jump out there and won't come back until I have twelve cutie marks!”
“Ack.” Rarity rubbed her horn. “Scootaloo, no. Stop! You know I can't—”
Sticking her tongue out, Scootaloo blew a raspberry then leaped.
“Scootaloo!” Rarity ran to the edge and leaned over. The balloon was still rising, and the dizzying height made Rarity blanch. She immediately crouched down, eyes barely peeping over. “I can't walk on clouds like you can! I don't even know how to fly this balloon! I haven't had time to read the instructions! Can't you at least promise to—” Rarity blinked and looked around. The hilly, curving, undulating cloudscape offered no hint of orange or dot of purple in any direction. “...stay in sight?”
Slumping down, Rarity moaned. “Oh, Rainbow Dash is going to kill me when she finds out I let you run off like that. Why am I so bad with kids?”
<>.<>.<>
Propelled by anger, Scootaloo ran. She ran through the cloud banks without any care or direction. All that mattered was putting as much distance between herself and Rarity as possible. That annoying, controlling, know it all!
Huffing for breath, she leaned against a cloud formation. Scootaloo half-expected to be picked up by her tail and carried off again, but her posterior remained unmolested. In fact, she peeked her nose up on top of the nearest cloud hill, and didn't see the pink balloon in any direction. Ha! Now she was free to do things her way, and not have to worry about little things like paying excessive attention to detail or fussing over completely trivial things.
Scooping at the ground, Scootaloo detached a small puff of fluff. The cloud was thin and wispy, but it looked good enough. She hopped on it, but rather than being treated to a shower of snowflakes like she'd expected, it instantly dissipated and she fell through to land flat on her face. “Ow.”
Spitting out a mouthful of ice crystals, she glared at the stupid cloud. “So that's how it's going to be, huh? Well two can play at that game!”
Getting back up, she tore at the fluffy hill, gouging and shaking the surface with each swing of her hoof. “This is for stupid snowponies and messy, melting forts!” Puffs of mist billowed around her. “This is for cloud banks stuck in cliffs!” Buzzing her wings, she hovered briefly before dive-bombing the base and carving out a wedge. The cloud formation was now barely attached, but being a cloud and all, it didn't fall. It just hovered there.
Scootaloo crawled under and forced the vaguely ball-shaped section free. It floated up and hovered slightly above the base cloud layer. Nodding to herself, she jumped and scrambled up the side of her creation. It started rolling, bogged down by her weight. This might cause other ponies to panic, but Scootaloo was good at balancing thanks to doing tricks with her scooter. She grasped the side and buzzed her wings, steadying the cloud. Once it was stable, she hopped the rest of the way to the top. “And this is for stupid cutie marks that don't ever appear!” Leaping high in the air, she dove head-first and pile-drived the cloud.
Kra-boom!
…
Scootaloo awoke dazed to the acrid odor of singed fur. One of her wings twitched and she stared up at the abomination that she'd created. Half of her cloud had turned gray, while the other half was dripping. It didn't shed a single snowflake.
Despite herself, Scootaloo teared up. She shook herself to clear off the singe marks, but her pride was the real victim. This mess was far worse than anything she'd done before, even when she'd first tried it with Rainbow Dash. She'd wanted so badly for everything to just work, but the world was bound and determined to foil her at every step of the way.
“Scootaloo! Are you okay?”
Doing a double-take, Scootaloo jumped when a familiar purple-maned white unicorn ran up to her. “Rarity? What are you doing here?”
“I came looking for you, of course. I'd have been here sooner but it took forever to figure out how to anchor the balloon and I didn't know where to look and when I heard the thunder, I came as quickly as I could.”
“Uh, I mean, how are you walking on clouds? You said you couldn't do that.”
“Oh, that.” Rarity tugged at her pink and white striped scarf. She pulled out a small book hidden in the folds of fabric and offered it to Scootaloo. “This is Cloudini's grimoire.”
Grabbing it, Scootaloo flipped it open to a random page. “—you start sinking, that probably means the spell's about to wear off. Should that happen, I'd advise recasting it immediately or grabbing the nearest pegasus if you can't cast—” Scootaloo stopped talking when she heard Rarity's teeth chatter. Her legs were shaking too. Flipping back a few pages, Scootaloo read the chapter title. “Cloudwalking spell?”
“Yes, that.” Rarity pressed a hoof against the ground and squeaked when it sank slightly. Tearing the book away from Scootaloo, she donned a thin, wire-framed pair of glasses and held the pages close to her face. Dripping with cold sweat, she winced and cast the spell on herself, awkwardly. Blue light washed smoothly over her left side before flickering, breaking up, and only few thin lines spun around her right side, covering her like flimsy lingerie. As the light faded, echoes of previous castings briefly became visible. For an instant, she looked as if she'd gone to war with an army of yarn and lost.
“Are you okay?” Scootaloo asked. She raised an eyebrow.
“Me? No, I'm—” Rarity carefully tucked the spellbook back into her scarf and took a step. Her eyes popped open when her hoof indented the fluffy, white cloud cover. “What am I saying!? Of course I'm not okay! I'm terrified of heights and here I am am trying to walk on clouds and my flimsy spell could wear off at any moment! SCOOTALOO, SAVE ME!” Jumping, Rarity hung in the air, casting a shadow on Scootaloo who winced and shielded her face.
“Oof.”
Rather than being squashed, Scootaloo hardly felt a thing. She blinked and looked up. Resting on her hoof, Rarity felt as light as a feather. “Uh, Rarity, how many times did you cast that spell on yourself?”
“Uh, well, maybe five or six, ulp, dozen times.”
Snickering, Scootaloo reared up and tossed Rarity back and forth like a giant beanbag.
“Hey! Stop that! What are you doing!?”
“This is awesome! You're even easier to push around than the clouds!” Adding some spin to her juggling, Scootaloo buzzed her wings as she kept tossing Rarity into the air, forcing the unicorn into flips and twirls.
“S-stop! I am NOT a plaything! Put me down this instant!”
Still snickering, Scootaloo stepped aside and Rarity flopped on her back, hardly disturbing the cloud other than a few curling wisps of mist. She laid there dazed, eyes rolling around independently.
Eventually, she got up and brushed herself off. “That was so uncouth.”
“Oh come on, you have to admit that was at least a little funny—” Rarity's scowled “—and besides, you did jump on me first.”
“Oh, right.” Rarity started to snicker and quickly covered her mouth, making strange muffled noises whist trying not to laugh.
Scootaloo simply rolled her eyes. She had a smile on her face, but the corners of the filly's eyes were bloodshot and there was dampness on her cheeks. Behind her was a rather odd and ominous piece of weather. “See, Rarity. I told you it was funny.”
“Yes, indeed.” Rarity stared past Scootaloo at the unholy creation. The cloud's dripping bottom flickered and gave off a low rumble. “Uh, Scootaloo, were you, perhaps, trying to get all of the weather-related cutie marks at the same time?”
“Huh?” Scootaloo turned around, and her face fell. Her smile vanished as quickly as the last cupcake at a birthday party. “Ugh, no! All I wanted was for it to snow, but the stupid thing did everything else but that! How am I supposed to impress Rainbow Dash if I can't even get snow-laden clouds to do what they're supposed to do! This is useless! I'm never going to get a cutie mark like this!”
“Ah. I see.” Rarity tapped on her chin and nodded.
“Aargh! No you don't! All you ever do is just tell me to slow down and pay attention, but it's just a stupid cloud! What is there to even look at? Slowing down is a waste of time, and that's all you've been trying to do all day—waste my time!”
“Scootaloo, is that what you really think?” Rarity sighed when the dejected orange filly nodded. “Darling, I'm sorry. I just—I guess I haven't been fair to you. Now that you've mentioned it, I can see what I've done wrong. I've allowed my fear of heights to cloud my judgment, so to speak. I need to set a good example, but how can I show you what I really mean if all I've done is just stall for the sake of being insufferable?”
“Uh, yeah. You have been pretty bad.” Scootaloo nodded.
“Well, I do hate being up here, but I think I've calmed down enough to stifle my fear and focus on your problems. Scootaloo, I want you to try again.” Rarity pointed at a fluffy cloud hill.
“Humph. And I bet you want me to do it excessively slowly too, right?”
“Actually, no. Just do what you did before and I'll stop you when I see the problem.”
Shrugging, Scootaloo walked up the hill and scooped out a chunk. Then she whacked at the ground and started digging for all she was worth.
“Okay, stop.”
Poking her head out of the hole she was digging, Scootaloo asked. “What? But I haven't even gotten the cloud free yet. Why do you want me to stop now?”
“Ssh. Listen carefully, please.”
“Huh?” Scootloo perked her ears up, then swiveled them around, eventually placing them against the cloud. “It sounds like... a light tinkling?”
“It sounds like snow, doesn't it?”
“It does?”
Rarity nodded. “No wonder Rainbow Dash could never figure out your problem. It's because you don't really have one.”
“I... What? What do you mean?”
Rarity walked up and placed a hoof on Scootaloo's shoulder, an action that would have had more impact if she wasn't currently as light as a whisker. “Let me ask you this: after weather ponies load clouds with snow, how is it that they get the snow back out?”
“By jumping on them. Everypony knows that.”
“More precisely, by shaking them. When you started digging...” Rarity let her voice trail off.
“I, uh, I guess I was too violent. When I dug, I shook the cloud, and by the time that I cut it free, all of the snow had already fallen out.”
“Exactly!” Rarity patted Scootaloo on the back, a mostly-useless gesture in her current state, but it was the thought that counted. She pointed at yet another one of the cloudscape's rolling hills. “Darling, I think you know what to do this time.”
“Right.” Plodding slowly, Scootaloo walked up and carefully scooped the cloud, trying not to disturb it. It took her much longer, but by showing care and delicacy, she freed a patch of cloud that felt cool to the touch. Her hard work paid off; once she jumped on it, it let loose a flurry of white crystals.
Rarity clapped her hooves. “See? I knew you could do it.”
Scootaloo watched with big eyes as the snow fluttered from her cloud into the one below. “I guess, but slowing everything down so much just makes this boring. Rainbow Dash doesn't have to be slow and careful and whatnot. What's up with that?”
“Hmm, yes.” Rarity clicked her tongue. “Scootaloo, I've talked to weather ponies, and they all say the same thing. The real secret to this kind of work is control. Rainbow Dash can work quickly because she's experienced and knows exactly what she's doing. This isn't something that you can just jump into and wing it and expect it all to work on the first try. Until you've put in a lot of time and practice, you'll have to take things slowly and carefully.”
“Ugh. I think I'd rather just stay on the ground and do tricks with my scooter.” Scootaloo glanced at her flank, which remained blank.
“Fair enough.” Rarity leaned against the cloud and shuddered when she sank in slightly. “Being on the ground sounds absolutely marvelous right now. Come on, you've had a busy day. Let's head back and get some ice cream.”
“Yay! Ice cream!”
<>.<>.<>
“Or not.” Rarity stared up in the sky. The pink balloon was nothing more than tiny silhouette against the backdrop of Equestria's brilliant sun. On one hoof, she held up the rope attached to the cloud anchor. It was still tied off on the mooring bracket, but that along with a broken-off part of the basket dangled on the end of the rope.
“So...” Scootaloo stared up at the balloon. “Now what?”
“Well, this is pretty dreadful, isn't it? I'm sorry, darling. I was in such a panic to go looking for you that I skipped inspecting the basket before I tied off the rope.” Rarity gulped. “Um, I guess we'll have to wait.”
“Wait? Wait for what?”
“Well, for somepony to notice that we're missing, of course.”
“Uh...” Staring up at the balloon, Scootaloo cocked her head. “But Rainbow Dash won't be back until tomorrow, and Fluttershy won't look for us up here.”
“What about your parents?” Rarity asked.
“Earth ponies.”
“Oh, right.”
Both of them sat on their haunches, staring up at the sky. Rarity took a deep breath and hummed to herself.
Scootaloo got up and kicked at the cloud cover. “Augh! I don't want to have to wait all night! This is so boring!”
“Scootaloo, it hasn't even been five minutes yet.”
“I know!” Pulling at her mane, she buzzed her wings in irritation. “What if we can't wait all night? What if your spell wears off before then?”
“Wears off—! SCOOTALOO, SAVE ME!” Suddenly awash with panic, Rarity once again jumped on the little filly.
“Seriously?” Catching her on one hoof over her head, Scootaloo looked up at the terrified unicorn. “Didn't we already do this?”
“Oh, um, well... Sorry about that. Just set me down and—” Scootaloo's eyes widened, as if she was struck with a wonderful idea, a wonderfully terrible idea. She grinned at Rarity, evilly. “—um, Scootaloo?”
“You know, I did things your way. I think it's about time that you tried things my way.” Licking her other foreleg, she held it out and squinted her violet eyes. In front of them was a cusp of cloud that curled up into a peak.
“Uh, Scootaloo, darling, what are you thinking?”
“A wise pony once told me that it's best to face your fears, and you're afraid of heights, right?”
“Um, I don't like where you're going with this. Could you put me down?” Rarity tried to shift her weight, but she had none to shift and remained trapped in Scootaloo's grip. “Please?”
Scootaloo ran, switching from trot to canter to full gallop.
“Scootaloo! What are you doing?”
She ran up the hill, buzzing her wings for that extra burst of speed. At the top, she faced directly into the sun and hurled Rarity as hard as she could. “For the Crystal Empire!”
Rarity lost all coherence and screeched at the top of her lungs. Wailing like a banshee, she flew high up in the sky, and... didn't come back down.
After sliding down the slope, Scootaloo sat at the bottom. She grinned madly, totally didn't wag her tail, and stared up at the wide, blue sky.
Eventually, the balloon sank down to cloud level and Scootaloo hopped in the basket. A much paler Rarity was working the controls. “What were you thinking!? That was awful!”
“Are you kidding? That was AWESOME! And besides, it worked, didn't it?”
“Uh, well, yes, but...” Rarity smacked her lips, but whatever she was thinking died before it came out of her mouth. She shook her head and went back to reading the instruction booklet before adjusting the balloon's lifting power. “I am never going to leave the ground ever again. You hear me!? Ever again!”
Scootaloo grinned and leaned back in the basket, rocking it slightly. The cloud cover seemed to float away as they sank through it. “Yeah, today was good, real good. I might not have earned my cutie mark, but I did learn a lot. Taking things slow and easy is a good strategy, but sometimes you do just have to wing it. Hey, Rarity, did you learn anything?”
The basket struck the ground, jarring its contents. Rarity bounced out. She hit the slush-covered ground face-first, smooching and kissing. “Ground, ground, wonderful sweet ground! Oh, how I've missed you!”
Scootaloo snickered and covered her mouth. “Nevermind.”
