I close my eyes, as if the words might disappear if I don’t look at them. I keep them closed for a while until I begin to see specks and smears agains the lids of my eyes. Taking a deep breath, I open my eyes, but still, there it is.
My guards have shown me things like this before; but it’s always been small things that the vandals would target, like school talent show posters or the margins of old books. Simple things, things that could be taken as pranks or jokes.
This is no joke.
I know come morning there will be unease in Canterlot. The upper class never could resist gossip, but I take some small form of relief in that few can read the old language.
“Your highness?”
I can’t help but jump slightly as the head of my guard approaches me, looking up with his familiar orange eyes. “My apologies Princess, I did not mean to startle you,” he says, bowing.
“No need for apologies Altair. Do you need something?” I ask him, turning my attention back to the huge navy blue symbols spray painted across the outer castle wall.
“I was just worried, Princess. This vandalism seems to be bothering you,” Altair says, straightening and looking back out over the castle towards the painted message.
I shift my eyes slightly as to be further from his own as I speak. “Of course we are. Our home has been desecrated,” I say, trying to hide the stiffness in my voice.
He pauses, taking a long slow deep breath. “If I may speak my mind, Princess, it seems like it’s much more than that.”
Sighing, I let my chin fall to my chest, my mane falling in my eyes. “You are quite perceptive Altair. You are familiar with the Nightmare Moon legends?”
He winces slightly, a flicker of pain in his eyes. “Not so much legends,” he says cautiously.
Closing my eyes, I speak, my voice creaking slightly. “Yes, we have made mistakes. But these legends were long ago recorded in the ancient language, prophesying of when I would escape the moon. Those letters on the wall are written in the same old Equestrian. But more than that- they’re the exact same words as the legend, word for word.”
I watch as his eyes flicker across the vandalism again, confusion and concern darkening his expression. “I know you told us to search for anything written in old Equestrian, but why? It’s a dead language.”
“But the Night-Mares still use it as their propaganda,” I tell him, lifting my head to look now to the sky. “As it seems, not every pony despised Nightmare Moon. Er don’t know how long it has been around, but there seems to be a group of ponies, the Night-Mares, who-”
My words are chocked off by tears. Taking a deep breath, I continue. “It seems they are convinced we would be a better ruler than our sister. We’ve learned awful things, Altair. Assassination plots, recruiting armies, stockpiling weapons. We’re so afraid, Altair.”
He looks up at me, still not quite understanding. “But if they respect you so much your highness, can’t you just tell them that’s not what you want?”
The tears escape my eyes, and his expression softens when he sees the water tracing down my cheeks. I turn away to hide them. “We’ve tried, but we can’t seem to contact them, no matter what we try. We haven’t even told our sister about these ‘Night-Mares,’ though no doubt she knows anyway.”
“We’ll figure things out Princess. Equestria’s survived worse then a handful of extremists,” Altair says gently, doing his best to comfort me without behaving above his rank.
Taking another deep breath, I stare out across the castle, across Canterlot, across the mountain, across the distant sweeping expanses of Equestria, cast in a blanket of starlight. “We indeed hope so,” I murmur, stepping towards the edge to better see the view.
How could anyone support me after what I’ve done? Crops wouldn’t have grown. Would I-no, would Nightmare Moon standby and let ponies starve, her ponies, her subjects she had once loved, slowly die because of her own jealousy?
Because of my jealousy?
“Would it really be so bad? Your highness?”
I glance to see Altair, still standing by my side like he’s always been, but as distant as the night sky. I wish he would open up, share his emotions with me. He is the head of my guard, and that is not what I need. What I need is a friend. “I’m not sure I understand the question.”
He pauses, and I can almost see him thinking. “Would it really be so bad to be the ruling princess?”
It comes out a laugh, though that’s not how I mean it to. “Would it really be so bad? Altair, we could never trust ourself. We wouldn’t get involved in any of my duties for three months after our return, and then we only agreed to resume them to help our sister. We would sooner return to the moon than lead Equestria. Who is to say we will do anything better than we did as Nightmare Moon? We could never lead Equestria,” I say, my words hardening. There is a bitter taste in my mouth, as if I don’t won’t to say those words, but they are the truth, after all.
“You’re better than that now, your Highness,” Altair says solemnly. “You’ve changed. You hardly sleep for all the time you spend helping your subjects in their dreams. Anyone can see you love them.”
Sighing, I shake my head. “Maybe in another thousand years or two w could if necessary, but that’s not what we want. We just want to be with Tia, be with our people, have friends who won’t leave us. But besides our sister, Cadence, and Twilight, I suppose everyone will leave us, one day.”
Altair looks up at me, and the orange light in his eyes had grown stronger. His expression is strange, smiling, but solemn as well. “Your guard will always be here for you. Good night, Luna.” He spreads his bat wings, and takes off, flying past the wall with the tribute to Nightmare Moon.
Glancing up to the stars, I take a deep breath and hold his words close to my chest. Maybe the warmth will thaw my heart and I’ll finally be okay again.
The Mare in the Moon. Myth from olden pony times. A wicked pony who wanted to rule Equestria. Defeated by the Elements of Harmony, she was imprisoned in the moon. On the longest day of the thousandth year, the stars will aid in her escape. She will try to bring about nighttime eternal-and the Elements will best her again. And she will never forgive herself for the hurt that she caused.
Never.
Author's Note
That was a fun one-shot to write! It's based off of two ideas. First, is that the text of the Mare in the Moon legend is shown on a poster in the school talent show in an episode, the exact text of that mysterious language; but it was only on one poster. Graffiti done by a member of the New Lunar Republic perhaps…? The second idea was what cannon Luna might think if there were actual supporters of a New Lunar Republic, and kind of just my fascination with the fact that she seems to be chronically depressed in the show. So yeah….
Oh, and by the way, I'm actually working on a full on vic that Altair is a character in, so I'll get a chance to develop him proper! 
