The Misadventures of Cassandra Walker

by Moon Worshipper

Rating: everyone
Tags: Human, Twilight Sparkle, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, Princess Luna, Spike, Comedy, Random, Adventure, Princess Celestia, Pinkie Pie
Length: 1561

A 12 year-old girl named Cassandra finds herself in the world of Equestria. While Celestia, Luna, and Twilight try to figure out how she got here, Cassandra tries even harder to contain her inner fangirl.

Cassandra Walker wakes up in Twilight's library and nearly goes insane. Celestia and Luna gets used to her pretty quickly. Twilight, however, still has to take time to get used to Cassandra's jokes and pranks. Pinkie and Cassandra are gonna get along very well!

Published 2015-10-03 04:40:03 UTC
Last updated 2015-10-03 04:40:03 UTC

This Can Not Be Happening!!

Cassandra woke up. She tried to move but she found that she was strapped to a bed. She looked around and saw a purple unicorn examining a stack of papers.

"Twilight Sparkle?!" Cassandra exclaimed. Twilight quickly turned around and looked at Cassandra, her eyes filled with terror.

"How do you know who I am?" she demanded. Cassandra's face went pale. How was she supposed to answer that?! Cassandra huffed, trying to think of an answer that wouldn't make Twilight go bonkers. But she couldn't think of any other answer than the truth. She opened her mouth and Twilight braced herself.

"Sooo.... the truth is... I've actually known you since I was four and....... I have little plushies of Celestia and Luna in my bedroom," that was the last sentence Cassandra said before Twilight had a mental breakdown.

"I-I don't-how is this-I never-" Twilight's eye started to twitch.

"T-Twilight! You're starting to scare me!" Cassandra nervously stated. Twilight just stood there, seemingly staring off into space. Cassandra stared at Twilight, too scared to interupt the awkward silence. Then, as if someone had pressed a reset button, Twilight finally spoke.

"I have to send a letter to the princesses!"

They See Me Trollin'

Twilight unstrapped Cassandra and went upstairs. Cassandra began to follow until she realized that she was missing something. She went back downstairs and looked around frantically. She soon came to realize that it wasn't down there. Cassandra's pupils shrank.

"TWILIGHT ACORNA SPARKLE!!!!" Cassandra hollered.

Twilight hurriedly galloped into the basement. Cassandra glared at her. "Where is my phone?" Cassandra asked, trying to remain calm.

"Your what?!" Twilight pondered.

"Don't play dumb with me, Purple Smart! TELL ME WHERE IT IS!!!" Cassandra was rapidly losing her temper. All of sudden, a little purple and green dragon appeared. He held a sparkley pink rectangle in one of his claws. Cassandra's eyes widened.

"Twilight, I found this on your bed when I woke up. What do you want me to do with it?" the dragon asked.

"Give me my phone, and no one gets hurt!" Cassandra slowly stepped towards him.

"Spike. Just give it to her!" Twilight said. Spike cautiously handed Cassandra her phone. Cassandra sighed, relieved that nothing happened to her precious item. She was about to put her phone inside of her pocket when she heard a loud and disgusting belch. A letter popped out of the green flame. At least it doesn't come out the other way, Cassandra thought. Twilight read the letter to herself.

"It's from Princess Celestia! She wants to see us in Canterlot immediatly!"

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

In a flash, Twilight had teleported them to the throne room where Celestia was waiting. Cassandra couldn't believe her luck. She about to meet the princesses! Her friends would be so jealous! The princess sat on her thronewhen Twilight and Cassandra came through the doors. Cassandra was figdeting with her ponytail, trying to hold in her excitement. Twilight trotted over to Celestia and Cassandra nervously followed. Celestia and Cassandra locked eyes for a split second. Cassandra blushed and quickly looked away.

"Would you mind introducing yourself?" Celestia asked, her voice as soft as silk. Cassandra didn't know what to say. She was never addressed by royalty before and talking to Celestia put her on a whole nother level. Cassandra hadn't realized that she was staring open-mouthed at Celestia until Twilight nudged her with her hoof. Just as Cassandra was about to speak, Princess Luna bursted through the doors.

"We heard that Twilight Sparkle was-" Luna paused at the sight of Cassandra. Cassandra, on the other hand, couldn't take it anymore.

"OMAGOSHOMAGOSHOMAGOSH!!!!!!!!!!! CELESTIA AND LUNA!!!!!! I'M LIKE, YOUR BIGGEST FAN!!!!!!!" Cassandra shrieked. Then she passed out. Luna gave her sister a what-in-tartarus-was-that look. Celestia shrugged, not knowing how to respond to what she just saw. Twilight was about to make sure she wasn't dead when Cassandra snapped her eyes open. She gave Twilight a grin that would make a timberwolf cower.

"It's me"

Twilight screamed and the princesses got ready to attack. Cassandra was still on her back, laughing hysterically.

"YOU SHOULDA SEEN THE LOOKS ON YOUR FACES!!!!!" she exclaimed. The princesses and Twilight exchanged looks.

"Why is this so funny to you?" asked a bewildered Twilight Sparkle.

"Cuz you sir, have just been trolled!"

Deez-WHAT?!

Cassandra woke up on a nice, soft bed. Celestia let her borrow one of the many suites in her castle. Cassandra put her hair up in a ponytail. The joke she played on Twilight and the princesses came back to her mind. Yeah, that was funny, but she had a new joke in mind. Cassandra walked through the hallways with a huge grin on her face.

"Looks like you finally showed up for breakfast!" Twilight exclaimed. There were pancakes everywhere. Cassandra spotted an empty seat with pancakes. Her smile grew wider.

"You guys actually thought about me!" Cassandra stated sarcastically. Princess Luna looked up from her 3-foot high pancake stack.

"We would never forget ab-glmnomn!" Luna stuck her muzzle in her stack of pancakes. Cassandra gave her an amused look while Celestia had a horrid look in her eyes.

"PRINCESS LUNA!!! THAT IS NOT THE WAY A PROPER PRINCESS EATS!!!!!" Celestia lectured. Luna looked up from her pancakes.

"Well excuuuuse me princess!" Luna glared at her sister playfully until they both started laughing. All of sudden, a pink pony bounced out of the kitchen. Cassandra's eyes got big. Senpai. SENPAI!!!, Cassandra's mind screamed. Luna smirked. CRAP! Cassandra forgot that Luna could read minds.

"Hey Pinkie! How's the pancakes?" Twilight smiled at her friend.

"It's going amazing!!! Does anypony need anymore pancakes? We have millions!!" Pinkie exclaimed. Twilight was about to say something when Cassandra cut her off.

"PINKIE!! I don't want any pancakes but can you cook something else for me?" Cassandra asked.

"OF COURSE!!! You know I love baking! What would you like?" Pinkie smiled. Cassandra smirked.

"Deez nutz!" Cassandra laughed. "GOTTEE!!" She and Pinkie laughed hysterically. Even Celestia laughed. Luna and Twilight, on the other hand, had confused looks on their faces.

"Ummmm........what?!" Twilight asked as she tried to decypher what Cassandra had said. But Twilight's confusion only made it funnier for Pinkie and Cassandra.

"Twilight! Listen closely! Deez....nutz!!" Cassandra said once she calmed down. Luna bursted out laughing as she finally got the joke. Poor Twilight was still lost in the dark. Cassandra whispered something in Twilight's ear. Twilight blushed as she got the joke.

"You guys are SO immature!" she scoffed. Cassandra shrugged.

"I'm only twelve! What do you expect?" she asked carelessly as Twilight face-hoofed.

Goin on a Road Trip

There was an unexpected emergency in Whinnyappolis. When Cassandra heard about this, instead of being worried, she was very excited.

"HOW COULD YOU BE EXCITED FOR POSSIBLE DANGER?!" Twilight screeched. Cassandra rolled her eyes.

"I don't know about you, but my life can get pretty boring sometimes," she replied. Twilight sighed. She could already tell that it was going to be a long day.

Pinkie bounced out of her room in the castle. She was ready for adventure.

"You bet your flank I am!!"

...what?

Anyways, she, Twilight, and Cassandra made their way to the Canterlot train station. As they were walking, ponies stopped and stared at Cassandra. She blushed with embarrassment. Being the center of attention was something to get used to. Cassandra couldn't stand it anymore.

"Hey Twilight. I just had the most brilliant idea!" She said with fake enthusiasm.

"Oh really?" Twilight stated sarcastically.

"Yep! I was just thinking, maybe it'd be faster if you use your magic and teleport us there!" Cassandra face-palmed.

"Oh. Right!"

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

With a flash, they arrived in the streets of Whinnyappolis. Purple slime covered the streets. Cassandra scowled.

"Eww! What is that?!" She asked repulsively.

"It looks like grape flavored ice creamed!!" Pinkie scooped it up with her hoof. Just as she about to put the wierd slimey stuff in her mouth, Cassandra instictively smacked it out of her hoof.

"I CANNOT believe you would actually eat that!!" She stared at Pinkie in disbelief.

"I eat random things I see all the time!" Pinkie exclaimed.

"Why am I not surprised?" Cassandra muttered.

As they continued walking, the slime covered up more and more parts of the city, making it difficult for them to walk.

"Trust me, it's not easy!" Pinkie said to no-one in particular.

"Pinkie, who are you talking to?!" Twilight asked in confusion. Pinkie shrugged.

"Still not surprised!" Cassandra muttered so only Twilight could hear. As they rounded the corner of another street, they heard a mare sceaming.

"C'mon girls!" Twilight had a look of determination on her face. Cassandra noticed that she also had fear in her eyes. When they got to the town square, they saw a massive pile of purple slime. It had several pairs of eyes and mouths. They also spotted the poor mare who had sceamed. She was covered in the slime. Twilight tried to blast it with magic, but the creature just absorbed it. It also gave the mare a chance to run. Cassandra took out her phone and snapped a picture of this creature. Twilight was about to attempt  another shot but the mare stopped her.

"NO! It's no use," she yelled frantically.

"What do you mean?!" Twilight started to panic.

"Nothing can stop the Smooze!"