Equestria hasn't been dropped yet

Shiny Pants was a stallion, living in Canterlot with his friendly marefriend Moonlight in a house. What a impressive start to begin a chapter. But hey, this is a comedy story, so I can do want I want.

It was late in the evening, and Shiny was sitting on the couch, switching through the TV's channels while Moonlight was drawing pictures in her room of herself drawing a picture of herself in her room, in boredom, because she was bored.

"How boring," she said. "I wish we had something like a PS4 or something, to kill the time."

"Nah, nah, we don't kill anything!" she heard Shiny yelling from the living room. "It is against the rules!"

"Yeah, maybe you're right," she continued drawing. It was some time later, as Shiny suddenly yelled "Hey, look. A documentary about unknown creatures is running on the TV!"

"Better than drawing myself over and over again..." Mooonlight said to herself, before she slid off the seat and walked into the living room, throwing herself onto the sofa.

By now, the show was about to start...

"Good evening, Equestria, and welcome to the show Documentary About Unknown Creatures. My name is... not important," a young adult stallion unicorn said, clad in a lab coat. He had a blue curly mane and tail, grey fur and sported a pair of not-nerdish-looking glasses.

"Today I'm going to show you the differences and similarities between us, the ponies of Equestria... and the Changelings."

"CHANGELINGS? WHERE? WHEN? WHO?" Shiny bolted up. Moonlight began to sweat, just from the word Changeling. This word is registered in the list of banned and forbidden words, directly after foreign unpronouncable words like "Schranz", "Döner", "Wechselpony" or "Donaudampfschiffahrtselektrizitätenhauptbetriebswerkbauunterbeamtengesellschaft". Try to say the last one... fluently.

"To explain the life of a Changeling, we need a Changeling. Fortunately, I'm one of the ponies who ain't racist and gave a Changeling mare a chance to be with me," he turned to the left. "Mirage, you can come in."

A door opened and a smiling Changeling mare in her normal form entered the studio. She took place next to the stallion and extended a insectoid wing over the stallion's back, a form of pure trust, both in pony and Changeling body language.

"My god... it touched him!" Shiny gasped. "It marked him as the next victim!"

"The origin of the Changeling race was a mystery for many hundred years... until today. The Changeling queen said that she and her race came from a carnivorous plant in a magical pod." the stallion explained.

The Changeling mare began to laugh "Utter lies. Our origins are like pony's, called evolution. We have the same fore-fathers like your race."

"Lies! Changeling's evolved from bugs!" Moonlight stated, to which Shiny nodded "My words."

"So, what makes a Changeling... a Changeling? Let's get over the features," the stallion said and stepped to side, to give the camera a good view of the Changeling.

"A Changeling has normally darkgrey skin, which does NOT consist of chitin. Only the carapace on the back consists of it. A Changeling of Chrysalis' folk also has holes in her legs..." the stallion's face moved in front of the camera, filling the whole view. "Thanks to a very particular alicorn..."

"And Changelings want to fill them with our love, dumbass..." Shiny murmured. Moonlight only watched in horror as the stallion left to give view once more at the Changeling. She could feel those compound eyes burning into her's...

"By the way, the eyes of a changeling are not compound eyes. I'm afraid I cannot tell how they are built like, but Mirage..." the stallion turned to the Changeling. "How well can you see?"

"In 4K, even in full darkness," the Changeling mare gleefully replied.

"So they can hunt their prey better..." Moonlight growled. And Shiny really did not want to meet a Changeling in full darkness.

"See? Changelings are intelligent creatures and always up-to-date. Next question, what is the third binomial theorem?"

"(a+b)x(a-b)=a²-b²" the Changeling said in one breath.

"It's manipulating him for it's own needs!" Shiny gasped and clapped his hooves against his face.

"What a smart parasite..." Moonlight thought. She must later warn the princesses, the Changelings might be using terrifying math techniques in their next invasion and destroying Equestria with a shitload of bad grades. And tormenting the princesses with eternal algebra for the rest of their lives until the universe implodes.

"Changeling's may have insectoid wings, but this doesn't make them like insects. They lack a lot of biological features. Obviously, they don't have six legs and don't carry their guts in their ass." the stallion stated.

"And we don't have those funny antennas on our heads," the Changeling added. "Yes, we lay eggs, but we have tits, too."

"Egg-laying mammals, that are Changelings. Not insects," the stallion then walked over to a table, with vegetables, fruits, and freshly made BBQ.

"Changelings can also eat like normal ponies... well, mostly. They can't digest grass, but they can eat vegetables, like salad, or asparagus. Or meat. Which shouldn't be a problem because we know and live with griffons. And they are carnivorous. So why is everypony complaining when someone comes by and says he's capable of eating meat? What kind of logic is that?"

"Totally retard," the Changelings said, shaking her head chuckling.

"But what are the pointy fangs for, hm? They are totally made for gutting somepony!" Moonlight complained to Shiny.

But the smart pony in the show already knew the answer.

"A Changeling's fangs are merely there for breaking the hard skin of particular fruits, for example a quince," the stallion said, then he reached over said fruit to the Changeling. The Changeling grabbed it with her holed forehooves, then she lurched forward with her open mouth and her fangs broke effortessly a piece of fruit off before eating it happily.

"A perfect example of a changeling killing a innocent quince in cold blood..." Moonlight whispered fearfully. "Imagine what they could do to our bodies with fangs like this..."

Shiny Pants gasped at the violent display of a quince being ripped in shreds by a Changeling and covered his private parts with his hooves.

"Now we are getting to the queens of the Changelings. Yes, queens. Chrysalis is not the only queen." the stallion announced.

The Changeling began to count. "There is Queen Thorax from the east, Queen Cocoon from the west, Queen Facette from the north... but they mostly keep their business to themselves."

"They're everywhere! Moonlight, save me!" Shiny cried and held onto his friendly marefriend.

"I can't! We're surrounded!" Moonlight cried back. "We're bucking doomed!"

"Changelings possess of a cognitive consciousness, called the hivemind. Every Changeling is capable of sending thoughts, informations or knowledge into this consciousness. However, this is completely optional. A Changeling can live without the hivemind. It doesn't even have to be linked to the hivemind. See this like some form of internet, only biological."

"A queen is not something like a main server, just saying. If someone has a bad day and ends the live of the queen, it won't affect the rest of the Changelings. Just the ping time decreases, that's all," the Changeling said. "I'm not linked to the hivemind anymore, but here I am. Standing, breathing. Living."

"But how you should react if you happen to be caught in a corner by a Changeling?" the stallion asked the camera.

"Run, fight, bomb the shit out of them, kill it with fire!" Moonlight shouted and hopped up and down on the couch. Shiny was slowly losing all his colour in his face and he looked like he was about to faint...

"If you are being attacked by a Changeling, don't run or fight. Just walk up to her... and hug her like this," the stallion reached over and hugged the Changeling hardly and lawfully. The Changeling hugged the pony back and sighed in content as her wings buzzed softly.

"The Changeling will automatically cease her attack because she knows there is no need for violence to gain some affection. And the affection I'm giving her is pure and unforced," the stallion proceeded to stroked the Changeling mare's fin and ears. "This is the way I found my marefriend. I saw through her actions. She just wanted someone to love."

The Changeling began to sigh and purr at the same time.

"*Gasp* That parasite has him! It's going to kill him!" Moonlight shrieked. "RUN YOU BUCKING RETARD! RUN, BITCH! RUN!"

Shiny didn't say anything because he already fainted. His eyes have also bulged out in pure horror and he drooled on the floor.

The stallion and the Changeling mare exchanged some nibs and pecks here and there, before they let go of each other and the stallion said: "This is it. Changelings are like you and me. There is nothing to fear about them. They are living breathing creatures, have dreams, hopes and wishes and they seek mostly what every other being seeks. They want to be loved and they want to love back. Like us. Yes, maybe the Changeling Queen Chrysalis can be quite a bitch, and destroys some random town in pure frustration, but our princesses are no better. Remember, who banished her own sister to the moon, instead of giving her some hardcore house arrest? Or sending six little mares with no military knowledge onto a mountain to hush a castle-sized dragon away? What should possibly go wrong? Huh? Next time, think before you take action... and give a Changeling a chance to be with you... and a warm hug. They're perfect marefriends. Maybe you can even call them all-in-one-ling, because they like to role-play..."

"I'm in the need of some love... bed time later?" the Changeling licked her fangs.

"Yes..." the stallion nodded, but then he reconsidered. "Aw, buck this, buck you, let's do it right here!"

Both of them started to make out furiously with each other, before they toppled over the table and moaned, out of the camera's view.

"Ooh, you sure know how to please a mare..."

"Such a smexy Changeling..."

The credits then rolled over the screen.

"Shiny! Did you see that?!" Moonlight screamed and waved at the TV like mad. "This monster killed this pony like nothing! Another poor soul lost at the grossly hooves of the Changelings!"

At this time, Shiny was not breathing anymore. He choked on his own spit. And the Changelings were held responsible for this and Chrysalis received a letter for paying for Shiny's gravestone...

KILLED TO DEATH

Shiny Pants

idfk - 2016