Call of Duty: Online

by Dustchu

Rating: teen
Tags: Human, Thriller, Science Fiction, Comedy, Crossover, Slice of Life
Length: 7446

The newest Call of Duty game goes live, with a record amount of players, strange thing one of the modes takes the players' characters to Equestria.

The newest Call of Duty game, Call of Duty: Online has finally arrived, with more than realistic graphics, hundreds of levels and insane character design. Almost over a billion people have joined and started playing, already getting into massive battles and taking advantage of everything.

However, one of the newer game modes ends up taking more than a few of the players into Equestria, a place they believe is a new battleground for them. Watch as the Elite, the n00bs, the spawn trappers, and every other type of CoD player battle each other in intense firefights, unknowingly saving an entire world while they're at it.

A Shit One shot brought to you by ASS STUDIOS
Written by: Dustchu
Hasbro and LF own MLPFIM
Call of Duty is owned by CoD People
I own my OCs and certain elements.

Published 1970-01-01 00:00:00 UTC
Last updated 2015-12-07 09:42:35 UTC

The Teabagganing

It was noon in the city of New York, and the weather was... weathery, not important!

In one of the many apartment buildings, there sat a young man, aged twenty two years old. He was sitting in his living room after coming home from work, at the subway. He wore a simple looking brown shirt and jeans, with a pair of white shoes that looked to be new. Green eyes stared at his gaming set up, a glorious 1080P 40 inch computer monitor, Razer gaming keyboard and mouse, and surround sound that was powerful enough to shake the foundations of the building.

This man, was David Phillips, known by his CoD tag, CapTeaBag. He was known far and wide for his supreme 360 no scope skills, and constant tea bagging of his slain foes. He grinned as he saw the launch of the newest Call of Duty game, there, across the screen, rolled the words that he would no doubt be fangasming over.

Call of Duty: Online

A chuckle escaped him, he had been waiting for this ever since he saw the trailer that came out on youtube. It looked glorious, amazing, and fantastic, and he managed to not only get it, but he also got his hands on the new map pack that included several old refurbished maps, along with various new ones that he had no doubt, would be perfect for his teabaggery. He got comfortable in his seat, waiting for the game to boot up as he pondered wheater his friends would be online or not.

He had gotten a raise last week and decided to use it to buy him and his friends the new maps and such so they could attack the newbies head on in an intense firefight, and so they could proect him while he racked up imaginary Tea Bagging points. He kept a list, and so far, no other had gathered as many points as he did. He's been tea bagging since the first Black Ops game came out, and none could match his skills...

Finally, after what felt like an eternity of loading, the game started, and he quickly slapped on his gaming headset, and placed his hands on the keyboard, taking a shaky breath as the game slowly showed the advertisments for the companies that made it. He saw many old and new ones, this game having been a massive project that brought together many companies. He also saw the logo of Atlas, the enemy corporation in one of the game's zombie modes that had several real life people he knew acting as the characters and voices.

Then, the starting screen came up.

"Black Hole"

April 9th, 2016, 11:40:59

Equestria, Ponyville Castle Map Room

Princess Twilight Spackle Sparkle

Princess of Friendship, Element of Harmony, Magic

She ventured into the map room, uncertain of what she was seeing on the massive piece of crystal. The map had come up not too long ago, the mare of twenty three expected to find a friendship problem floating over one of the many locations strawn out across Equestria, however, she got nothing... the map was plain, no cutie marks, just the locations of Canterlot, Manehattan, Ponyville, and Appaloosa lit up like one of Pinkie Pie's parties.

She was unsure of what that meant, why was it those four locations in particular were lit up so brightly?

"This doesn't feel right... something is wrong." She muttered to herself, horn flaring as she popped into existence a scroll she could write on. Spike was away with Rarity in Manehattan on some errand, leaving her with only Starlight Glimmer. She scribbled away furiously on it, writing a letter to her former mentor turned friend.

Dear Celestia

I know it has been some time since my last letter, but I am writing you now because I fear somethign is about to happen. The map I told you you about has appeared once more, however, it is not showing a friendship problem, instead it is showing four major locations, Ponyville, Appaloosa, Manehattan and Canterlot. I am not sure why this is, but my heart andmy gut are telling me this isn't right...

I fear something bad is about to happen, and I am not sure what to do.

I await your quick response.

Your faithful friend, Twilight Sparkle.

With that little letter written up, she cast a spell and suddenly sent it off, flying towards Canterlot. She hummed to herself in thought, as Starlight entered the room behind her.

"Hey Twilight," The mare greted, but upon seeing her friend's face, she frowned slightly. "Is... somethign wrong?" Starlight wondered, her eyes glancing over at the map. "Why's the map lit up, is there a problem that needs solving?"

"No, I'm afraid not." Twilight turned around and began to pace around the map, her eyes staring at it in great detail. "It appeared last night, and nothing has been shown on the map, no friendshi[p problems, no marks... there is nothing, except these four locations." She explained, pointing to Ponyville, Appaloosa, Manehattan, and Canterlot.

"That's weird... why is that?" Starlight questioned, she knew very little about the map and its powers, only knowing that once every now and then it would show a problem that needs fixing somewhere in the world, sending one or two ponies to solve it. She wouldn't lie if you asked her if she wanted to be picked next time.

"I'm... I'm not sure, I don't understand this, but my gut us telling me... these four places... are going to be experiancing something soon... and I'm not sure it'll be a good thing." Twilight sighed, sitting down as, unbeknownst to her, the skies above Ponyville, Appaloosa, Manehattan and Canterlot... turned a steely gray color... as swirling black masses formed.

"Call of Duty: Online"

April 9th, 2016, 11:53:45

New York, Apartment 2F

David Phillips

Subway Worker, CoD Teabagger Professional

David trembling giddily as he logged in as CapTeaBag, as the insane graphics behind the options and starting screen were showing the intense firefights of footage played by beta testers and such. He was excited as a kid in a candy store, as excited a virgin about to bang his best friend's hot mom, as excited as... uh... excited...

You get the point.

Anyway, once he logged in, he immediatly entered into one of the rooms, spotting a plain avatar tamplate. He saw there were a little over half a dozen people in the room, and so he began setting up his character, and included his custom sticker which would be on his gun, and on his profile as he racked up kill after kill. He crafted his character, giving it a custom set of armor that did little to hide himself, shoulder plates tinged a golden hue and a chest plate tinged gold that he managed to actually throw his emblem on, which was a pair of tea bags. A pair of golden tinged knee and shine guards, also tinged gold, with black clothes underneath. His character's face was hidden by a mask, while the skin tone was a pale skinned color to match his in real life one.

"Fucking faggot, I mean, the game just came out and... and... people are already talking shit, its ridiculous." David heard, recognizing the voice right away as one of his friends.

"Yo yo you, CapTeaBag in the house, what's up bitch?" He yelled, getting a few cheers... or jeers, who knows.

"Sup faggot?" His friend asked, his username was ButtcrackBandit.

"Just waiting for you assholes to get done so we can play some CoD." David admitted, cackling soon after as he heard something... squeaky... sounding. "Oh gawd..."

"OOOOOOOOOH MYYYYYY GAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAWWWWWWWD ITS OUT ITS OUT! EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!" Someone squealed at incredibly loud decibles, possibly causing one person to go deaf for eternity.

David and his friend cringed from the Squeaker, David taking off one of his headset ear cups to dig in his ear several times until it cleared up. Afterwards, he put it back on, only to curse loudly. "Fucking Squeakers!"

"AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!" The Squeaker squeaked once more, joining their team, both men groaned loudly from that. Both moving to kick him off their team as some other people joined up, some nobodies and a few familiar faces with names that recognized. After getting the squeaker kicked off, he just rejoined again and again, and each time he was kicked off, he screamed loudly, forcing them to turn down their volume until he shut up.

After getting a good sized team, the group of people then went about selecting a map... which took forever... because everyone was being a bitch about it. David, meanwhile was choosing his loudout, impressed by some of the newer guns, as well as the incorporation of older guns like the AK-47, SCAR-LMG, various old style pistols like the M1911 Colt, Glock 17, and Beretta 92FS. He saw they were modified somewhat to look the part of a game world that was set in the future, but liked that they brought back older guns.

He chose his loadout finally, which consisted of Semtax Grenades, C4, an AK-47 with a larger clip and ACOG scope, and a Glock 17 for a sidearm.

At last...

He was ready to Tea Bag.

"LET'S GO TO THIS ONE! LET'S GO TO THIS ONE ITS PRETTY LOOKING! URRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRF!" The squeaker screamed into the mic, causing extreme feedback and making his microphone screech slightly.

"Goddamn!" Both David and his friend cursed, wishing whoever that was turned down their damn mic. They had their fair share of squeakers before, having battled them in many maps, including fighting alongside them in the old school zombie maps of the old days. They pondered if this game would have it... once their ears stopped bleeding of course.

"So Cap," His friend started. "We teaming up again like before?" The other man asked, as someone clicked on random map, which everyone else decided to do, including David and ButtcrackBandit.

"Yep, CapTeaBag and ButtcrackBandit are going on the offensive this time around baby!" David cackled, as the countdown timer started. Looking at his clock, David noted it ws 11:59, and he chuckled as the timer counted down from ten.

However... what he... or Twilight for that matter... didn't know, was that, what happened in the next ten seconds, would change everything.

Ten.

David placed his hands on the keyboard.

Nine.

Twilight heard someone cry out outside, making her look up.

Eight.

David heard some strange noise in his headphones, even over the sounds of the chat room and the people talking smack.

Seven.

Twilight got up, teleporting to her study with Starlight in hot pursuit.

Six.

The screen started to change for some reason, and he feared the game would crash as he feasted on a candy bar.

FIve.

Outside, in the town square, Twilight saw from her study window several strange glyphs apparing on the ground, resembling circles with smaller dots in the middle.

Four.

David heard something that sounds like a cry of fear, followed by some girl yelling for Everypony to run, making him slurp down his Mountain Dew in anxiousness.

Three.

Twilight spotted the glyphs glowing brightly, and the skies started to change, morphing into grays and blacks as swirling black masses appeared, like black whirlpools.

Two.

The screen went black, and started to show him the new level... he saw tiny colorful things, and blinked, as a bird smacked into his window.

One.

The world suddenly exploded in white, sparks flying as the glyphs exploded, sending some ponies scrambling for cover. Twilight covered her eyes as Starlight burst into the room, seeing the light and instantly casting a shield spell over her friend and herself, as debris crashed into it. Ponies screamed and cried out.

Meanwhile, with David.

He had just started, spotting his sweet AK-47 aimed forward, his custom gun sticker on the side as he looked around his new map... and he rose an eyebrow, when he spotted, not a war torn desert, not a desolate hotel battle ground, or even a fucked up hospital level... instead, he, along with his friend and a few others, were currently standing in the most colorful game world he had even seen. The brightly colored cottages with thatched rooftops, wooden doorways and flowers planted out front. There was also a creepy looking sky that looked like something out of the Extinction map from Call of Duty: Ghosts. The man of twenty two also spotted a funky bright crystal castle, with, to his surprise, some kind of horse thing staring at him with wide eyes.

Needless to say, everyone was wondering what the balls was going on.

"Duuuuuuuuuuude, what the fuck?" A gamer, named JizzyJuice questioned, his avatar decked out in red armor and carrying a heavy looking LMG that escaped David's mind.

"I am tripping balls right now man," Another, labeled N00bHunta7 droned, giggling to himself as his avatar carried a high powered Berrett rIfle, equipped with a glowing infared scope and bipod. The character also had his character decked out in Cyan colored armor, and had a sticker on his gun and shoulder pads of a thunderbolt.  "This looks more like a cartoon bro, huehuehuehue."

David shook his head, rubbing his eyes under his glasses as he tried to decipher what he was seeing. All around him were... horses? Colorful little horses with marks on their asses, some had horns, other had wings, and some had nothing at all. All of them stared with huge giant eyes at the humans, wondering who in the sweet icy nipples of Luna they were.

"Uhhhh... okay... Trayarch, the fuck's been smoking to make this level." He spoke, as a few of the ponies looked shocked. "Umm... Johnny, you seeing what I'm seeing?"

"Yeeeeeeaaaah, I uh... I got nothing bro." His friend admitted, he was also at a loss.

Suddenly, a loud voice boomed across the skies, startling the ponies, and the humans as it spiked their mics into making feedback.

PLAYERS... CHOOSE YOUR BATTLEMODE!

The voice boomed, loudly, exceedingly loudly as a trio of ponies with flowers in their manes all fainted, at the same time.

"What the fuck even." Dsvid wondered, seeing a list of battlemodes, he figured this must be some kind of prank Trayarch was playing, or some kind of hack. Either way, he was going to play, regardless. "Oh well... uhhh... Deathmatch maybe?" He suggested.

"Yeah, let's do that one." JizzyJuice said, a few ponies screaming when he said that. "Goddamn it, ERIC! DID YOU SPIKE MY DRINK AGAIN!" He suddenly yelled off screen, after a quiet response, he yelled again, "I bet you did you fucker!"

"Let's just... play... I need... ugh." David shook his head, starting the deathmatch.

"Call of Duty: Online"

April 9th, 2016, 12:00:00

Equestria, Manehattan CoD Map

Thomas Ezekiel Ritterby

Freelance Editor and Computer Programmer

Thomas was unsure of this map, he has played many maps before, but this one seemed... strange to him, and filled with plenty of copyright material. He sat in his home, on his gaming set up eyeballing the Manehattan level with an upraised eyebrow, he saw, to his... shock, I guess, My Little Pony ponies running around the city, fleeing from him, and the people he was teamed up with. Some regulars he had played with on occassion.

Next to him was the call sign ShieldHunter, donning Reaper armor, wielding a KN-44 with a BOA 3 sight, with an XM-53 as his backup. The character was also donning a thruster pack, and seemed to be looking around. This was a player Thomas had played with many times, and alwso yelled at for his constant tea bagging of people, when eh should have just been killing poor unsuspecting squeakers and newbies.

On their left were three others, with the call signs, Michel Romaul, Lieutenant Morita and Predator. These were three others he had fought alongside, and against on numerous occassons. Predator had a loadout of an SVG -100 with a thermal sight and supressor, with an RK5 as a sidearm outfitted with an ELO and a supressor as well. He wore some simple looking armor, and his character seemed to be looking across the battlefield through the scope. Lieutenant Morita was outfitted with a PPSH-41 with an extended magazine, a PTRS-41, and some camo armor that hid his character well, even though he was not hiding.

The final one, Michel Romaul... made Thomas raise an eyebrow. The character had no primary firearm, instead he seemed to be carrying two swords with an M1911 as a sidearm. He was also not wearing any armor at all, simply wearing the black clothing that was under every CoD character skin, a tight black t shirt, black gloves and fatigues. The character simply looked around, head moving to and fro as Thomas wondered if Trayarch was smoking something.

Thomas was a smart man, he considered himself as such. Looking down at his own SVG-100, decked out with a Recon sight and a Ballistic CPU, he pondered if Hasbro and Trayarch had somehow... decided to make this game together. Seeing how he was currently standing in Equestria, his character anyway, he was still physically in America.

"Uh, this is weird." Predator spoke, turning towards Thomas. "Is... is this Manehattan?" He asked.

"Looks like it," Thomas spoke, keeping his tone level as he heard some people already going nuts in the chat, talking about ponyfags and lesbians and Doritos Locos Tacos. "What the hell..."

Suddenly, before anymore questions could be asked, a sudden loud boom cracked across the map and Equestria.

PLAYERS... CHOOSE YOUR BATTLEMODE!

Cringing from the loud voice nearly cracking open his eardrums like a pair of eggs, Thomas shook his head, moving to select a battlemode with everyone else. All the while, he kept looking around the screen, seeing some ponies were hiding, while others just stood in the streets, staring at them and no doubt wondering what was going on. Thomas had no idea either, as he racked his brain for information, trying to figure out why ponies were in his new CoD game.

He figured it was a hack of some sort, or perhaps a joke played by Trayarch and Hasbro.

But another part of him... the brony part of him... wondered if there was more to this then meets the eye. The ponies seemed to move fluidly, a lot different then the CoD characters, and upon looking into the sky, he saw the sky was ripped apart, black and red swirling masses dotting it as far as he could see. He also saw pegasi flying above, looking down below on them.

I'm getting a gut feeling...

His thoughts were cut short...

When the starting horn blew.

And the game...

Begun...

"Tea Baggers"

April 9th, 2016, 12:05:00

Equestria, Ponyville

Starlight Glimmer

Princess of Friendship's Student of Friendship.

Twilight was at a loss for words, once the humans, she knew from the world being protected by Sunset Shimmer, were suddenly released from whatever captivating captivity they were captive in, and suddenly started running around, screaming out orders, taunts, or declarations of tea bagging. Whatever that was, she had no idea, but it didn't sound good to her. Starlight turned to her, to ask something, but was stopped when one of the humans suddenly leapt up at the balcony, beams of white light firing from his back as he landed on the balcony and pushed Starlight out of the way.

"Move bitch, get out the way!" He cackled, as gunfire suddenly started, causing msany ponies to start screaming in terror. "Ima slap you with my dick!" The male cried, lunging down one of the halls, as a scream sounded from someone.

"Goddamn it!"

Twilight shook her head, not entirely sure what was going on as Starlight climbed back onto her hooves, glaring slightly in the direction the human had ran off to. "What is going on?" Starlight Glimmer questioned, before Twilight turned to her.

"Starlight, I need you to hold down the fort here." Twilight ordered her, getting look of shock from the other mare.

"W-wait what!" Starlight backpedeled, as the ground shook from an explosion.

"There's no time, guard the castle!" WIth that, the princess disappeared in a flash of light, leaving Starlight by herself.

Alone...

With weird creatures running around screaming about balls and dicks.

"Buck me."

Starlight turned around, horn flared as she ran out of the study and into the hall, looking for the creatures. She nothing except holes in the walls, burn marks, several floating objects on the floor that looked like they could be held, and a pair of dogtags. Starlight rose aneyebrow as she cantered over to them, curosity overtaking her senses as she reached out to touch the dog tags...

Instantly a bright white light flashed before her eyes, and she was thrown back with a cry of surprise. The mare landed on the floor, skidding backwards as she heard footsteps, the mare shook her head, feeling dizzy as a black blur obscured her vision... and she felt something press against her muzzle several times.

"Ee oo ee oo ee oo ee oo ee oo~" A CoD character chanted, standing and kneeling several times against Starlight's face...

She was being tea bagged.

"HAHAHAH TEA BAGGED BEESH!" The man cried, suddenly darting away and leaving Starlight feeling violated.

Tea bagging? She thought, suddenly thinking of the area the creature was shoving into her face...

Several times...

It was his nutsack...

Warm and pungy...

"You motherbucker!" Starlight cried, getting up and galloping after the creature, who started to scream in terror.

"Oh my god its chasing me, halp!"

"GET BACK HERE!" Starlight bellowed, horn glowing as she started shooting beams at him, which he managed to luckily dodge.

"WHAT EVEN! LASER BEAMS! I call HAX!" He yelled suddenly, throwing several things behind him that hit the floor, pins flying off. "HAX!"

Before Starlight suddenly saw another birght light that blined her, sending her galloping into a broomcloset, crashing into brooms, buckets, and a comic book that felt sticky to the touch. Starlight cried out in rage, thrashing around in blind agony as she tried to find out what exactly happened.

"Can't touch this!" The man cried, standing by the door with an M14 aimed at the pony. "I am the master of teabagging!"

Suddenly, the booming voice returned with a vengeance.

FIRST BLOOD

It bellowed, as text suddenly appeared in the skies.

CapTeaBag Slaughtered PewdieBot444

"Gotcha bitch!" A voice cackled, which belonged to someone the teabagger knew.

"Oh hey, David is that you?" The man aiming his gun at Starlight, whose name floated above him in a small text which read, HarmonyBalls69.

"Oh, hey Kevin!" 'David' greeted, as Starlight shook her head.

"Duuuuude... ponies man... what the fuck?" Kevin questioned David, as Starlight managed to sit up, holding her aching head.

The mare had no idea what was going on, but it seemed these humans did.

Suddenly, the ground shook... well, in the ponies case, it was the ground, in the players case, it was their screen.

"W-what's happening!" Starlight cried, looking terrified.

"Whooohoho, earthquake?" Kevin, or HarmonyBalls69 chuckled, as the booming voice returned once again.

OBJECTIVE ADDED: PROTECT THE PONY

A sudden outcry of confusion, and some excitment rang out from the players... and some ponies, as a list of names and pictures appeared in front of the players eyes, and in the sky above the towns and cities.

STARLIGHT GLIMMER, TWILIGHT SPARKLE, OCTAVIA MELODY, VINYL SCRATCH, LYRA HEARTSTRINGS, BON BON, PRINCESS LUNA, AND PRINCESS CELESTIA.

Suddenly, Kevin turned to look at Starlight, and Starlight him.

Both stared for the longest time.

"Bonus points!"

"AHHHHHHHH!"

"Call of Duty: Online"

April 9th, 2016, 12:43:00

Equestria, Manehattan CoD Map

Thomas Ezekiel Ritterby

Freelance Editor and Computer Programmer

Thomas was... having an odd time in this map. He had just killed several enemy players, when suddenly a new objective was added... something he found confusing, seeing how in multiplayer, there were little to no objectives added in midplay. And this one, involved protectin several pony characters, all of which he knew from seeing them in a few episodes. He narrowed his eyes, pondering what this meant as he, along with Predator, and ShieldHunter dashed down the streets, weapons primed.

"Yep... still weird." Predator spoke again, as Thomas led them down an alleyway where they stopped, and crouched.

This is strange... and I'm not entirely sure Trayarch knows about this... or any of the other players... Thomas thought to himself, as ShieldHunter scanned the alleyway ahead of them through his sights. The mechanics of the game felt odd to him, not in a physical sense, but more in a metephorical one, how his character moved, how the others moved so fluidly, and how... real everything looked despite everything being so... cartoony.

It hit him the wrong way, what was going on.

"Whoa..." A voice spoke up behind them, prompting them all to turn around and gaze upon an alabaster pony, with two tone blue hair, and purple shades. The pony grinned at the group of four, as her headphones blared some beat around her neck, having taken them off. "Trippy, who're you guys?"

Is that... Vinyl Scratch? Thomas wondered, he saw her name pop up as one of the ponies to protect... but why were they needing protection?

He was about to get his answer... when he saw a choice for players to turn against their teammates and kill the ponies, and cause some major destruction.

About half of the blue dots that were allies on their map... suddenly turn red...

Half of their team had defected to the other side

"Oh christ." ShieldHunter spoke. "We're boned, we're outnumbered!"

Suddenly several teams of CoD gamers started firing at each other, gunshots echoing throughout the alleyways as Vinyl Scratch looked around in alarm. "Holy! What's going on!"

Thomas narrowed his eyes, steeling himself as he felt a sudden chill in the air of his room. He was an intelligent man, and he knew there was something more to this... game then meets the eye. FIrst off, why would Hasbro allow their MLPFIM franchise to be a part of Call of Duty? It made no sense, even for a joke! He did know however, that this was happening for a reason, maybe Trayarch had no idea, or even Hasbro, the vast majority of players in the chat room seemed to think it was something... greater.

He himself... thought it was something greater, as did his cohorts it seems.

"What's the plan boss?" Predatore asked Thomas, as lines of text appeared across their screen...

It only made things worse...

Depending on your perspective.

Vehicle Packages: On. Friendly Fire: On. Airstrikes: On.

Vehicle Packages... is that what I think it is...? Thomas wondered... narrowing his eyes even further.

"Uuuhhh, vehicle packages?" Lieutenant Morita questioned, sounding perplexed by the vehicle package.

"Bro... Tanks."

April 9th, 2016, 12:43:34

Equestria, Manehattan CoD map

Bob and Joe

Professional Rednecks

"Dude..."

"This is..."

"Dude..."

"Ah think Ah'm gonna cry a little"

"Dude... let's DO THIS MAN!"

The two CoD gamers cheered, before boarding the vehicle they had found, after parachuting into Manhattan, insane laughs coming from them, as they started up the beast...

"Call of Duty: Online"

April 9th, 2016, 12:43:36

Equestria, Manehattan CoD Map

Thomas Ezekiel Ritterby

Freelance Editor and Computer Programmer

Suddenly... a pair of loud CoD gamers came barreling down the street... however, it was how they came barreling down that made the group of four humans and one pony worry. It was a tank, and not just any, but an Abrahms tank, one with two names hovering above it. JoeBob12 and ThatOneRedneck, both were inside the tank and driving through the street, causing ponies and CoD gamers alike to scatter.

"Fuck." Thomas muttered, realizing that the vehicle package was just what he thought it was...

"Saviors or... Idiots?"

April 9th, 2016, 12:55:00

Equestria, Canterlot

Princess Celestia

Ruler of Equestria, Cake Fanatic

Celestia... she was not having a fun day. She had woken up, had several cakes for breakfast, did some yoga, proceeded to spy on Fancy Pants and his wife in their bedroom from afar, when all of a sudden, several... hundred humans had appeared out of thin air, fully armed with more ordinance then the American military. The Princess of the Sun, did not appreciate having several human soldiers in her dining room, messing with her cake while yelling, "Tea Bags for life!"

She was on her balcony now, looking up into the sky at the swirling black masses. She could sense a faint, almost familiar energy in the air amidst the gunfire, explosions and declarations of ball busting and 360 no scoping, something that confused her.

What confused her more however, was that everytime one of the soldiers died, they came right back as if they were not dead to begin with. She suspected Nercomancy, but detected none of it around, however. Luna was likewise perplexed, watching the humans who had - somehow - gotten into the castle and were killing each other rather... brutally, leaving bloodstains and burns marks, bullet holes and other things lying around.

She wasn't sure how this happened, but it had to do with the... strange magic in the air, something strong... ancent, familiar that she had not felt in nearly three hundred years. Celestia thought, but could not placed it, so she pushed it aside in hopes of somehow stopping whatever was happening...

Mostly for paperwork reasons...

So much paperwork.

Celestia teleported back to her throne room, and the second she appeared she saw several... things lurking around, chewing at the curtains and sets of armor. Her eyes grew wide slightly from how they looked, so menacing, bug like and yet... far worse then the uglist Changeling. Suddenly, one of them spotted her and hwoeld a sort of cry, before running at her.

She was startled by its speed, and was about to throw up a shield, when suddenly, sporadic shots of gunfire sent it flying back with a cry. More gunfire sounded, and when Celestia looked, she saw several of the human soldiers moving in, firing their guns and killing the creatures with laughes, hoots, and curses that made even the thousand year diarch blush.

Then one of the bigger ones started for Celestia, she casted a shield spell in time to stop it.

"SUCK MY DICK!" One of the humans cried before he jumped onto the beast, pulling off several blocks of C4 and tossing them down, before yelling, "FOR NAAAAAAAAAARNIIIIIIIAAAAAAAAAA!" He then pressed the button on a small controller, effectively creating a massive explosion that engulfed him and the beast, the other soldiers took cover as flames were sent flying, along with chunks of the beast and blood, orange glowy goop, and some underwear...

Don't ask.

Celestia just stared, as the explosion died down, and there was nothing but bloody chunks of meat on the floor.

DECIMATED!

The voice boomed across the skies, as the humans cheered.

"Nailed it!"

"Fuck yeah!"

"MOM! WHERE'S MY CHOCOLATE MILK! MOOOOOOOM!"

"Holy fuck, shut up Toby!"

Celestia turned around to see the three remaining humans, who pretty much saved her life from the beasts. Names hovered above their heads, odd ones that she had little trouble believing were actual names. CardHock8, LilToby, and NutBuster. These three were dressed in similar fatigues that almost matched one another, and looked to be suited for inner city conflicts

"I feel like that's all you drink Toby, holy fuck how are you not constipated by now?" The ghostly voice of their recently deceased, BootyNanners questioned, making Celestia blink.

Before anyone could continue their asinine conversation, Celestia butted in. She held up a hoof to the group, blinking away the stupid she had just experienced. "Who are you three, what exactly is going on here?" She questioned them, giving them a stern gaze.

"We're here to chew ass and kick gum... and we're all outta gum." CardHock8 told her, as NutBuster turned to him.

"Dude... do you know what yo-" NutBuster questioned, as Celestia watched LilToby yell at his mother for chocalate milk.

"DON'T QUESTION MY LOGICS NUTBUSTER!" The man cried, tackling his friend to the ground.

"Hey, how'd you tackle me!" NutBuster asked, as LilToby's character was spinning around and a sudden squeal could be heard from the player, demanding that his Clash of Clans start loading up.

"Shift plus T." Was all CardHock8 said, as he stood up, and then proceeded to tea bag his prone friend, much to his friend's anger.

"STOOOOOOOP ASSHOLE!"

Celestia just sighed...

"Call of Duty: Online"

April 9th, 2016, 12:44:20

Equestria, Manehattan CoD Map

Aaron

Blacksmith

Aaron followed his leader and friends through the streets of Manehattan, Vinyl Scratch galloping right next to him after they had spotted the tank and realized what was happening next. The Trollers, The Hackers, and The Soloists would all be having the time of their life when they snagged one of these vehicles, causing some major havoc around the map. He was a bit perplexed when he first started playing, and saw several... ponies of all things galloping around. He wasn't sure what to think of that, but he was just deciding to follow Argent_Cinere down the alleyway.

"What's going on!" Vinyl had questioned Aaron.

"We're supposed to protect you and Octavia, which we're going to do now." He answered, speaking into his mic on instinct rather then turning to click on Vinyl as a means of convaying speech to the supposed NPC... however... he was proven wrong when she spoke back.

"What, Octy! What's going to happen to her!" She questioned again, looking scared for her earth pony friend.

Aaron blinked at his computer screen, before shaking his head a bit. That's an interesting feature, voice recognition? He wondered, he didn't think there was anything like that floating around, at least not in this kind of format. But he shrugged and kept on playing.

Suddenly, the group of five found themselves pinned down once they were outside, several snipers having camped out in the buildings above, firing heavy duty rifle rounds at them and blowing off chunks of their cover, which was mostly carriages and the alleyway walls. They cursed as they ran around, quickly trying to tke them out before Vinyl was spotted and hurt, or worse... killed.

Aaron had spotted one of the snipers, his Gamer tag was hidden but he paid no attention to it, as he quicklu used his skiills to take down the sniper. He ran down the street, jumping onto the carriage and jumping off of it before aiming his SVG-100, once he saw the reticule a few scant inches above the head, he clicked his mouse button and fired twice, sending two rounds into the gamer's head and killing his character.

Predator Murdered BoyToy69

Aaron allowed himself a ghost of a smile, as he continued fighting. He landed on the ground, quickly dashing into cover as bullets were sent flying his way, as he did, he witnessed the... rather odd member of their group, the one with two swords running on top of a carriage, both sliver, almost futuristic katana swords held in his hands as he leapt up onto a building's ledge before breaking into a window and quickly attacking whoever was up there.

Michel Romaul slaughtered ShotBot11 & PewPew

Aaron had to admit, for a guy wearing no armor or using any firearms... he was pretty damn skilled.

Behind him, he saw both ShieldHunter and Lieutenant Morita firing at a group of soldiers down the road, killing several and wounding others. ShieldHunter threw several grenades, causing explosions to engulf carriages and scatter Ponies hiding behind them to run into the buildings. Morita however, was standing out in the open, bullets whizzing by him as he fired his PPSH-41, getting several headshots from afar, a very impressive feat considering.

Argent was near the back, firing his own gun and giving the others various commands. Aaron had to give it to the man, he was a good leader, and he was happy to follow the orders if it led them to victory.

"Aaron, take Vinyl Scratch and Michel and head east, I see another objective marker that's purple, it must be Octavia. Get her and head to the Hotel on 33rd Street just south of that position." Argent ordered Aaron, who had just now noticed he had Vinyl by his side, the mare looking around in slight fear from the explosions.

"Roger that." Aaron answered, turning to Vinyl. "Let's go and get Octavia, me and my friends are here to help you guys." He told her, before dashing off, Vinyl Scratch in tow.

"What about your friends, they're outnumbered!" Vinly protested, not feeling right leaving behind the others, even though she didn't know them.

"They can handle themselves, they're experienced at this sort of thing." He explianed, having played many CoD games with them over the years, sure Scott was a new addition to their team, but he had proven himself to be a proficent player and not a complete douche. He had no doubts in his mind they would be alright.

Aaron led Vinyl Scratch as Michel landed beside them, having being running along the fire escapes on the buildings like a ninja, cause that's awesome. Aaron gave him a nod through the game with the new controls, he returned it and both soldiers ran down the alleyway, headed towards what would hopefully be Octavia's position.

"Fucking Trolls."

April 9th, 2016, 1:00:00

Equestria, Manehattan

Octavia Melody

Professional Cellist, Secret Unknown Occupation

Octavia was... for the lack of a better word, pissed.

She had just gotten out of the shower when suddenly, the building shook violently as if an explosion had gone off, it also made the hot water stop. Much to her displeasure, forcing her to get out, covered in only a towel as she looked ou into the city... to say she was shocked and pissed was an understatement.

She saw... strange monkey things running around, jumping off of building tops, firing strange weapons at each other, and using odd vehicles to plow into monkeys without vehicles, into each other, or into buildings like a drunk carriage driver. It was chaos, and she idly wondered if Discord had anything behind this. Octavia knew the Spirit of Chaos hd be reformed, but with this happening she was second guessing it.

A sudden scream of something flying past her window made her back away in fright, heart pounding in her chest as whatever it was was soon followed by two more objects. She went back to her window, opening it up and outside, she spotted several... strange aircraft flying through the skies, firing at each other. The one in front suddenly exploded, before the burning wreckage of what was left behind spiralled downward into one of the buildings, crashing into it and causing explosions.

Octavia just stared...

"Bugger me." She spoke, before quickly drying herself off and moving to wake up Vinyl. She didn't know what was going on, but she knew they both had to get out of here. ANother shake of the building sent her stumbling forward, crashing head first into Vinyl's room, she smacked into the door with several curses before rubbing her head, looking up to see if her friend was awake...

She was... in fact, she wasn't even in the room!

"Celestia damn it Vinyl!" She swore as she turned around to go and find her friend, she galloped over to the front door, bucking it open before galloping out into the halls. She must have gone out for one of her walks, damn it. Octavia knew Vinyl loved to walk every now and then, so she shouldn't have been too surprised that her best friend had left, sad thing it was done during a fucking war of all things.  Octavia continued down the hall, as other doors were opened and the ponies inside were wondering what the noises outside were, she paid little to no attention to them as she ran to the stairs and went down them.

She had to find Vinyl.

"Call of Duty: Online"

April 9th, 2016, 1:12:43

Equestria, Manehattan CoD Map

Michel Romual

Blacksmith

Michel followed Predator and Vinyl for some time, but the three ended up getting attacked by several enemy soldiers, all of them using heavy duty weapons as they ran all across the place. Sliding into cover, firing explosive arrows or special bullets, some of them were dashing across the walls or using their jetpacks to fly up and out of the way, Michel cursed when he saw the name of one of the characters they were fighting. The black text, and overuse of underscores, it was a team of highly skilled gamers that, no matter where he and his friends went in games, they always seemed to follow.

_T_e_a_m_U_n_d_e_r_s_c_o_r_e_s_

Stupid name, he knew that much, but their skills were nothing to bat an eye at. He narrowed his eyes as he and Aaron split off, Vinyl following his teammate as he ran towards cover near a carriage. He sheathed his sword in his right hand and pulled out his pistol, a a futuristic looking M1911. FLipping the safety off, he rolled out of cover and aimed his pistol, managing to get his iron sights lined up with one of the enemy's bodies and fired, sending three rounds through the air as he quickly sped off into new cover. The second he left, his original position was attacked by a distant enemy with an RPG, not one of the TU's but someone else entirely. A look over to his right revealed said enemy nearby, a newbie player he could tell, no cover, armed with an RPG and a grenade launcher, no sidearm.

Michel had his character run down the road, aiming his pistol and nailing a headshot before jumping up towards another carriage and then up onto the nearby building's ledge. The TU had taken cover in the city's bank, using its natural fortification for keeping robbers out to wage their assault. "Team Underscore is attacking us." Michel spoke, relaying it to the entire team. "Looks like the assholes followed us into this game to."

"Bloody hell!" Michel heard Thomas curse, as he spotted Aaron firing his gun, trying to down as many as he could. "Of course they're here, the bastards."

"They just want a slice of our awesome." Aaron replied, chuckling as he managed to kill one of the TU players.

Predator nailed _B_B_B_

Michel had goe into the building he was near, kneeling down inside managing to get a good look of the battlefield from above. He was on the second floor, therefore giving him a nice vantage point, shame he didn't have a rifle. Above he heard the sounds of jets flying over, and a curious look up revealed that there were jets and planes in play as well as helicopters, and drones. He wasn't sure how to feel about this, it was a no holds barred deathmatch, anything and everything was thrown into this map with... ponies of all things.

"Looks like they've managed to recruit more players, there's more then I remember." Michel commented, eyeballing the dozens of black and gold colored soldiers firing off their guns and explosives. RPGs and heavy machine guns, snipers and assult rifles all beat down on Aaron's position where he was behind some quickly degrading cover inside a small shop. The physics in this game were realistic, everything seemed to be destructable... very destructable. He idly pondered what one of those jets could do to a building, if it was heavily armed that is.

"They've pronbably been planning for this, who knows how long they've been training themselves." Thomas told them.

Michel narrowed his eyes, he needed to get Aaron and Vinyl out of there... but how?

His answer came, when his eyes looked over at the minimap, and he spotted a teammate of theirs nearby... the very distinct vehicle icon signaling they had gotten their hands on something. He grinned, bringing up the chat box so he could ask them to help out. He saw their gamer tag, and he had a funny feeling they would help out once he mentioned a certain character with them.