As the sun rose, a nondescript unicorn walked into the House of Enchanted Comics. Humming to herself, the shopkeeper started organizing the boxes. It was far too early for most residents of Canterlot, but she always believed in getting work done as quickly as possible. Besides which, today was shipment day, and she had almost a literal ton of customers to get ready for. After all, she mused, it's not every day that the Power Ponies franchise releases a new story arc. The rumor mill was running nonstop about the new villain it was going to have. So far, the only thing that had been verified was that the villain was dressed in a cloak made of shadows. Still, that was enough to get the fandom going crazy over what the name and powers of the character would be. Not that she was complaining. The more the comics were talked about, the more ponies came to her store, and the more books she sold. The nice part about catering to a fandom was that they kept up with literally every single release, meaning that she could count on them to buy anything and everything with the Power Ponies logo on it. Sure, there had been some complaints about magic in the comics, but those were ridiculous. It's not as if the Power Ponies are real. Suddenly, there was a flash of light from behind her. As she turned to see what it was, something blurred out of the crate and into her horn. The last thing she saw before she fell unconscious was a green aura traveling over her field of vision. Then everything went black.
The Dragon and the Draconequus
As Spike walked out of the castle, he couldn't help but feel an overwhelming sense of tranquility. Everything was (finally) going right. There were no monsters, no natural disasters, no friends with broken wings, and he had finally gotten rid of that nasty cold. Sleeping in a palace made of crystal sounded nice, but it held no heat at all. He finally had a chance for peace and quiet, and he planned to start reviewing his latest Power Ponies comic so he would be caught-up when the new volume came out. Yep, a nice peaceful day, without any interruptions from anyo-
"Why, hello there, little Speck!"
Spike sighed. "My name is Spike, Discombobulus."
The draconequus slithered down out of the air, and coiled himself in front of Spike. "I do believe that's the first time anyone's ever called me that. Bonus point for originality, but I never lose a battle of insults."
"Well then," Spike answered, "what's your reply?"
"Give me a moment. I just got back from Fluttershy's, so my vitriolic sarcasm is a bit rusty." Discord rubbed his chin with one paw, his temple with a claw, and his forehead with something that looked like those appendages from the mirror-world. "I've got it! You, sir are an uncultured little barbarian, who would like nothing more than to live in your comic book universe so you could beat people over the head for fun!"
Spike smirked. He and Rainbow Dash frequently got into this kind of thing, and Discord apparently didn't understand the value of blowing the opposition out of the water. "Please, Discord. At least give me a challenge? You are a fart factory, slug-slimed, sack-of-rat-guts-in-cat-vomit, cheesy, scab-picked, pimple-squeezing finger bandage! A week old maggot burger with everything on it and flies on the side!"
Discord blinked. "Wow. That's pretty impressive. But can I ask you something?"
"Fire away," Spike grinned.
"If I'm a maggot burger why don't you eat me! You two-toned antelope-headed, slime-coated, pimple-farmin' paramecium brain, munchin' on your own mucus, suffering from chaos spirit envy!"
Spike sat in shock and awe. By this time, the two had attracted quite a crowd, with foals making up most of it. Pipsqueak piped up and asked, "Mr. Discord, sir? What's a para-meez-ee-um?"
Discord grinned as he pointed to Spike and shouted, "I'll tell you what a paramecium is! That's the paramecium! It's a one-celled critter with no brain, that can't even find an original insult! Don't mess with me man, I'm a draconequus!" with that, he snapped his talons, and both Spike and Discord were gone in a flash of light. There was a moment of stunned silence, then Pipsqueak's voice was heard. "When's lunch?"
