Chapters I turned the machine on. Various sounds accompanied it coming to life. This wasn't intentional, but I hadn't had time to make the machine properly. I knew I only had about a half hour before someone came to check on me, so I turned on the recording.
"Hello. When you get this message, I will, no doubt, be gone. The machine in this room in a trans-dimensional portal, and although you can probably get it to work, you won't be able to follow me, even though I know you'll try. But I didn't leave this message just to gloat, I have some important things you need to hear. First: Do not make a subject-628. Some of you may have already suspected I broke down my mental barriers, but although I am annoyed with you all, I doubt another test subject will be so kind as to leave you alive. Second: In my room, you will find traces of a deadly virus I created. Don't worry, though. It won't kill humans. I figured that the best way to help you lot would be to kill every species of livestock in the world, as well as several other impediments to society. You may complain about not getting bacon and eggs now, but I calculate that the chance of humanity lasting another century has significantly improved. Third: On another file on this computer, you will find all of my research I've deemed 'safe'. None of the brain stuff, though. We don't want anyone else intelligent enough to create a virus that would kill essentially all humans."
I noted the time in my head , "Well, it's about time to leave this nightmarish place now. Oh, and the camera here is playing a recording from last month. I don't know how you guys haven't caught on by now."
And with that, I stepped through the portal.
***
I woke up in a forest. I immediately realized that something was wrong. My body had not only completely changed (which was intentional. I didn't want to look like an alien to the natives), but I had significantly reduced capacities. Although I was fairly sure I was much more physically able than average, much of my genetically-engineered capabilities were gone. Thankfully, I retained my increased awareness of my body, and I knew I would be able to re-design my structure over the next couple years. In light of my physical limitations, I decided to calculate my current intellect. There used to be a type of intelligence test, called the IQ test, but I had reached the maximum 300 by the age of 8. Anticipating this, the scientists had created a new intelligence test, the Relling test. The average person measured at one thousand Rellings (by definition), with two thousand being highly intelligent, and three thousand being genius. I currently measured at 8256.3 Rellings, which, although intelligent, was nothing compared to my previous one hundred and twenty thousand Rellings. Even my telepathy was greatly weakened.
I also realized that the servos in my joints, and other mechanical parts had been left behind, not having been transported by the portal. I quickly calculated the size of the explosion that my power cell would have made, and although it would have damaged the portal and computer, both would be recoverable, but I reflected it would put my message in a slightly different tone.
The next thing I realized was that I'd been sitting in the forest for a half hour. I tried to get up, but immediately tripped.
"Quadruped. Right," I muttered as I got up to examine my new body. I was equestrian, with blue fur and orange mane and tail. And although I had a horn of unknown purpose, the strangest thing of all was the image imprinted on my flank, a black square with a red pattern overlaying it.
The image itself was not as surprising as the fact that I recognized it. I had drawn that picture when I was three, a stereotyped version of a microchip. At this point, I was starting to get really creeped out. Unable to find any source for the image, I moved onto examining my horn. My horn was about four inches long, and had an uncanny amount of nerves. It was obviously not meant for stabbing, but there were several nerves that made it seem like some sort of limb. However, nothing in the structure implied bio-luminescence, or anything at all, really, especially nothing meriting that amount of sensitivity. I began to 'push' with my horn, trying to figure out its purpose, and, although the air began to fill with a static charge, nothing else of note happened.
Not seeing any point in staying put, I headed east, where the forest was slightly clearer. After about ten minutes, I came upon a cottage. Before approaching the cottage, I spent a few minutes making a primitive covering of leaves, just in case of nudity taboo. I reached the door, and knocked on it with my front hoof.
A yellow mare with pink hair and wings opened the door. Despite the small size of the wings, they appeared to be designed for flight. She was not wearing anything. I pushed physical attraction from my mind, and psychically (not to be confused with physically) probed her mind for basic information.
Name: Fluttershy
Race: Pegasus Pony
Age: 2.18 * 10^8 half lives of carbon-15
Intelligence: 1012.7 Rellings
Language: Equestrian
Basic Abilities: Flight, Class 3 Hypnosis
Learning a language by observing someone else's mind fast enough to understand something they say immediately is quite difficult, but I got the general idea of what she said
"Oh my goodness! You need to come inside now! You must be so cold to wear that!" She hurried me inside and removed my cloak, throwing it outside. So much for nudity taboo, "You must be hungry too! Oh my, where did you come from?"
At this point, I had a hold of the language enough to respond in a short sentence, "The forest"
She paled. As much as she could beneath brightly colored fur, that is, "You came from the Everfree Forest? Are you hurt? Hold on, I'll be back with medical supplies and soup."
I knew I had no need of medical supplies; whatever Fluttershy was afraid of in that forest, I hadn't met it. However, I hadn't appeared through the portal with anything in my stomach, so I was hungry. I looked around, seeing various kinds of animals. I'd seen some outside too, but it was obviously more of a hobby than a farm. She probably worked as a veterinarian or something similar. I decided to scan one of the birds.
Name: N/A
Race: Robin
Age: 6.3 * 10^6 half lives of carbon-15
Intelligence: 206.4 Rellings
Language: N/A
Basic Abilities: Flight
Before I could think very much about a robin with 20% the intellect of an average human, Fluttershy re-entered the room.
"I brought you some soup. It's got potatoes, carrots, and oats. Are you hurt at all?" She was carrying a large bowl of soup, and had a sack that presumably contained medical supplies over her shoulder.
"I have no injuries I am aware of," I said, before using my front hooves to drink the soup. Fortunately, my hooves had a sort of 'sticky' quality when I wanted them to.
Fluttershy gave me a look that indicated something I was doing was odd, although she was to polite to say what. She spoke on another topic, however, "I don't believe I've introduced myself. My name is Fluttershy. What's yours?"
Not knowing much about names here, other than that hers was appropriate, I decided to introduce myself with the name of a character from an old favorite game of mine, rather than subject-627, "My name is Recumen. Pleasure to meet you, Fluttershy"
"Recumen. That's an... interesting name," she then added hastily, "Not in a bad way, I mean. I hope I didn't offend you"
"When you travel as far as I have, naming practices change"
Fluttershy blinked, "You're from the other side of the Everfree forest? I didn't think there were any ponies there"
Darn.
"It's kind of a long story. Anyway..." I quickly changed the subject, "is there anywhere I could sleep tonight?"
"Of course! I have a guest bedroom. Are you planning on staying around long?"
"I don't know. Is there a town anywhere nearby?"
"Oh! Ponyville is just a half mile or so east of here"
Not commenting on the terrible pun, I went to the guest bedroom and pretended to get ready to sleep. Once Fluttershy left, I got up, climbed out the window, and headed towards Ponyville.
Getting in the library had been fairly easy. Although the door had been locked, the library (a large, hollowed out tree that was somehow still alive) it had been fairly climbable, and the latch in the window could be done from the outside with a bit of creativity. I was standing in what appeared to be the upstairs study of the library, although it was quite a bit bigger than it needed to be. Although there were some books in the room, seemingly left by people who planned to continue reading the next day, the most interesting feature of the room was the telescope.
I got the telescope properly focused and looked into the night sky. My purpose in using it was to observe the stars, and perhaps learn something about the system, or any satellites the planet might have. However, when I began looking at the stars, something seemed off. They didn't quite look like stars. Acting on a hunch, I moved the telescope across the room, and looked at the same star to get a different view.
There was no denying it. The stars were close. Way to close. The one I had observed had been barely ten miles above the surface. Even more disturbing was the moon. Not only did it seem to have the image of a horned equine, but it was emmiting radiation that could only be explained with a massive energy buildup. Worse, it was slowly, but steadily, rising. Based on the size of the moon, the buildup would be enough to destroy it, and cause a major catastrophe on the surface in just a couple days.
I sat in silence for several minutes trying to comprehend the facts. This world seemed to obey few, if any, of the laws of physics and logic. The entire universe looked like a big capsule with a planet in the center. To top it all off, in 2-3 days, the entire world might as well be annihilated. I'd come to this world to get a fresh start, where I could build technology without masters pressing me for weapons, but it looked like I'd arrived shortly before the apocalypse.
Not one to let such things stop me, I got to my original purpose in finding the town library. You see, although I was capable of gleaning basic skills from being around others, knowledge besides that of a basic identity was beyond my reach at the time. I went down to the main library area, and began going through books. After a couple of hours of reading material I could barely understand, due to basic lack of knowledge of the language, I'd managed to glean some basic information.
There were three types of ponies that lived in the land of Equestria. Unicorns (I was one), Pegasi, and Earth Ponies. Each had different abilities. Although 'magic' was mentioned many times, the knowledge was so basic that it was not detailed in any books. The land was apparently ruled by an immortal ruler named Celestia of a rare race called 'Alicorns', with the traits of all three common races, as well as some abilities of their own. Although there were societies outside of Equestria, they were much less civilized, and were held back by fear of the might of Celestia.
Having learned all I could, and needing some sleep, I began to make my leave. Although I didn't lock the window behind me, I made a decent effort to disguise my intrusion. I managed to make it into Fluttershy's house through my bed sheet rope, and fell into unconsciousness instantly.
***
I woke up the next day to Fluttershy singing as she took care of her animals. I walked down the stairs, and out of the house to see her flying, with no means of support other than slowly flapping her undersized wings. Before she noticed me staring, I decided to speak.
"You're pretty good," I had achieved a level of understanding with the language that if I didn't use advanced words, I could keep from sounding like an idiot.
The moment she heard me, she landed and hid behind a bush with a startled noise.
"I didn't mean to startle you. Just compliment your singing. Could you resume?"
She waited a few seconds before responding, "I... Don't like ponies listening to my singing. I'm really sorry if that bothers you"
I raised one hoof in a gesture I hoped was calming, "No, not at all. I don't like people listening to my singing either," I had decided the way 'pony' was used was racist, so I was not going to use it, "I was just saying you're good. And I was planning on leaving soon anyway. Try to see if I can get a job there, and all that stuff. Besides, you've been plenty hospitable already"
She took a breath before speaking, "Thanks. It's no trouble at all. I try to help anypony I can who needs it. It's the least I can do"
"That's very generous of you. Before I go, do you know of anywhere I might get a some sort of job?"
"Oh. The apple farm northish of here, called Sweet Apple Acres, always needs work this time of year. But they're having a family reunion now, since Ponyville is hosting the Summer Sun Celebration the day after tomorrow. It's actually the thousandth one, so it's extra special. Anyway, I don't know how much work they have that they'd let a stranger do, but I'd say it's still your best shot at getting a decent job quickly. I mean, you may have a bit more trouble, being a unicorn and all, but still"
I knew that unicorns were the physically weakest of the races. I also knew that I was supposed to have telekinesis, and other abilities, but I didn't know how to use them. Although I needed to hang around unicorns to glean the skill to use magic, I would also need an excuse. I hoped at least some of the apple family were unicorns. However, something about what she said bugged me. The timing couldn't be a coincidence.
"What's the Summer Sun Celebration?"
She was surprised at my ignorance, but didn't hesitate to explain, "It's the beginning of the longest day of the year. As Celestia raises the sun, and the new year begins, ponies who have been staying up all night begin partying in earnest. Sometimes ponies drop where they're standing from exhaustion. Poor things"
"Would this celebration have anything to do with the moon? Even a little bit?"
"No. I don't think so," She thought for a few seconds before continuing, "Unless you count the legend about Nightmare Moon, but that's just a foal story"
"What is this legend about? Why would someone be named 'Nightmare Moon'?"
"Well, the story goes that once upon a time, Celestia ruled with her sister Luna. Luna became jealous of ponies enjoying day more than night, eventually becoming Nightmare Moon, attacking her sister, and being banished to the moon. The legend says that after a thousand years, she will escape to plunge the world into eternal darkness. A few ponies are actually convinced the story is true, but some ponies will come up with all sorts of conspiracy theories"
Disappointed that I had to leave after getting her on a roll, but also knowing that I wouldn't get any more useful information from speaking to her, I decided to take my leave.
"Thanks for everything, Fluttershy. I hope to speak to you later"
"Goodbye to you too, Recumen. I hope you come to visit again soon"
And with that, I was off to Sweet Apple Acres in an effort to get more pieces to this puzzle before it was too late.
As I approached the farm called Sweet Apple Acres, I noted the unusual liveliness of the orchard. Although I knew the Earth Ponies has subtle magic allowing them to strengthen and revitalize plants of all types, this was far beyond what even modern technology could do. I resolved to one day investigate what they could do if used together.
If I could survive the week, that is.
As I approached the farm, I was greeted by an orange mare with a blonde, braided mane.
Name: Applejack
Race: Earth Pony
Age: 2.16 * 10^8 half lives of carbon-15
Intelligence: 984.4 Rellings
Language: Equestrian
Basic Abilities: Naturecraft
She took one of my hooves in two of hers and began shaking it, somewhat more vigorously that was probably necessary, "How ya doin' there, partner? Don't reckon I've seen you around these parts before. My name's Applejack, what's yours?"
I removed my hoof and answered calmly, "I'm Recumen. I'm here looking for work. Quite busy here, I see"
"Recumen. Odd name, but Ah've heard odder. Ah thought ya might've been the pony the princess sent to check on the apples, come a day early. How are ya?"
"I'm doing fine. Anyway, this pony the princess mentioned. What did she say about him?"
"Oh, just the usual. Somepony would come by to check on how the preparations for the celebration are goin', and to be extra friendly"
"Interesting. Actually, did the princess mention the gender of the investigator at all?"
Applejack thought for a moment, "Ah don't reckon she did. Fancy that"
I got back onto topic, "Weird. Anyway, is there anything I can do to help out?"
"Well, you better let the cookin' get done by family who know their stuff. Nopony can beat a home-baked apple family pastry. The rest is really just grunt work, probably a bit to much for a unicorn like y'self"
In response to this, I dodged to the side, got Applejack in a modified headlock, lifted her over my shoulder, and slammed her onto her side. The startled mare got up with a surprised expression.
"Woo boy! I haven't been tossed like that since Big Mac stopped giving piggyback rides! I'm sure we can find something for ya to do"
I spent the next five hours or so moving apples, hauling wood for cookfires, and other strength-based work. Unfortunately, during my work I found that none of the Apples were unicorns. Every last one was an Earth Pony. After making sure of this, and gathering some basic info by chatting with other Apples, I decided my time would be better spent elsewhere, so (after grabbing and eating three apple fritters) I approached Applejack.
"I think I'm done, Applejack. I didn't really need all that much money, but it was real nice to get acquainted with your family"
Applejack nodded, "Ah was watching you for a while, and unless ya slowed a whole lot while Ah wasn't lookin', you worked like a bear the entire time," She pulled about a dozen shiny, brass coins out of a pouch, and placed them in my hoof, "Ah reckon you earned this. Don't look like you got any pockets to hole 'em in, so ya might have to carry them the whole way to whatever you're lookin' to get"
As I began to walk away, she called out to me once more, "You're welcome at the apple farm any time, Recumen!"
After I was out of sight, I placed the coins in my mouth and swallowed them. I could recover them at any time.
And with that, I left Sweet Apple Acres with less time and more questions then I had entered with. I decided to head back to the town library, and see what I could find about this Nightmare Moon legend.
***
"How you doing?"
I was startled by a voice behind me. Although I had passed several ponies at this point, none had spoken thus far. Behind me was a pink mare with a pink, fluffy mane.
Name: Pinkie Pie
Race: Earth Pony
Age: 2.06 * 10^8 half lives of carbon-15
Intelligence: 787.5 Rellings
Language: Equestrian
Basic Abilities: ERROR
She continued speaking, "I haven't seen you around here before! You must be new! Not only am I exited about this huuuge party coming up, I'm exited that you're here to enjoy it too!"
"Excuse me, who—" My inquiry of her name was interrupted by her continued monologue
"I'm Pinkie Pie. I'm going to throw you the most awesome 'welcome to Ponyville' party ever!" She paused, "Oh yeah. What's your name?"
"I'm Recumen. Do you always—"
"That's a really cool name! Can I call you 'Rekie'?"
"Can I call you 'Pinkie'?" I countered
She gave out a bubbly laugh, "Silly! Everypony already calls me Pinkie! Nice try, though. See you at the surprise party!"
Not wanting to lose time to a party, I called after her, "Wouldn't it not be a surprise if you threw it today? Wouldn't it be better if you had the party later so I didn't know it was coming?"
She though for a moment, "True. On the other hand, it has to be before the Summer Sun Celebration, or it'll be anticlimactic. Therefore, you'd be expecting it tomorrow. Unless I actually threw it today, but you'd see that coming now..." She stood for a few moments considering the conundrum I had given her, "I'm going to have to think about it. You're tricky, Rekie! But I'll think of something. I always do!"
The way she said that last sentence was slightly creepy, and I found myself relieved to be done with the conversation. When I turned, I found myself facing a yellow mare with an orange mane, who had presumably been watching the whole conversation.
Name: Carrot Top
Race: Earth Pony
Age: 3.57 * 10^8 half lives of carbon-15
Intelligence: 1059.4 Rellings
Language: Equestrian
Basic Abilities: Naturecraft
"Sorry about that. Pinkie Pie always gets exited before a big celebration, and with the thousandth Summer Sun Celebration happening here, it seems like she's going to explode. Probably a bit late for this, but avoiding her would probably be the best thing for your sanity right now"
She left then, leaving me even more frustrated and confused than before.
***
I found it. After three hours of searching through the library, I managed to find a historically worded account of what happened to Nightmare Moon. Because of Occam's razor, I knew that at least part of the legend had to be true. The text only really stated what Fluttershy had said about the legend, but there was one crucial line included:
The elder sister harnessed the most powerful magic known to ponydom: the Elements of Harmony. Using the magic of the Elements of Harmony, she defeated her younger sister, and banished her permanently in the moon.
Despite the word 'permanently' being obviously misused here, it seemed the best piece of information I had gotten thusfar. There were some other interesting notes, such as the 'stars aiding in her escape' which was completely possible, but irrelevant, unless I could, in a single day , build a weapon that could fire ten miles into the air with perfect accuracy.
It took another two hours to find the next piece to the puzzle: The Elements of Harmony: A Reference Guide. Not having gotten enough sleep the last night, and knowing I would need every scrap of mental energy in the morning, I decided to sleep in the study that night, and read the book in the morning.
The security was very low in the library, and mostly relied on visitor honesty to leave after closing time. I hid behind a desk with a lot of drawers, until everyone left. At that point, I found a comfortable spot to lay down and sleep for the night.
I dreampt of fire falling from the sky.
I woke to the sound of a key in the door. Unless I had misread the 8:00AM-8:00PM sign, it was an hour before the library actually opened. I decided to start reading my book, and wait for the intruder to enter.
Before I could get very far, a stallion entered the room, a soldier if the golden armor was any tell. Interestingly, although he was chocolate brown on most spectrums, he was stark white in the visible ones.
Name: Cookie Crumbles
Race: Pegasus
Age: 3.51 * 10^8 half lives of carbon-15
Intelligence: 802.3 Rellings
Language: Equestrian
Basic Abilities: Flight
It was a moment before he notice me, "Halt! What are you doing in here? The library isn't open yet," his voice was distorted, as I could hear both the disguised and undisguised versions.
I didn't even look up at the green soldier, "I'm reading. It's kind of important, so I'm pulling an all-nighter," it was technically true
Unable to find a flaw with my logic, he changed the subject, "My orders are to clear the area, to reserve Twilight Sparkle, the princesses protogè. She will be staying the night"
"I would like to meet Twilight. I'll just say I came in after you left"
"I was not given orders for exceptions. I'm going to have to ask you to leave"
I looked up at him, "Look, Cookie. I need to meet Twilight, and I'll bet she wants to see me too. You just leave me alone, and the rest will take care of itself"
Under the illusion, the stallion was pale, "H-how did you know my name? ...Are you an agent?"
"If that makes your life easier," I said dismissively.
After staring at me for nearly a minute, he got onto his work. He may have been green, but Cookie was adept at cleaning and carrying furniture. It was a good twenty minutes before opening when he had finished, and left.
Over the next two hours or so, I both improved my reading speed, and learned a great deal from the book. Although most of it was obscure references and legends about the Elements, I was able to pick up a few basic facts about them.
The Elements of Harmony were a set of six crystals with the power to dispel anything that threatened the order and peace of Equestria. They could only be wielded by a group of friends that collectively had the six 'attributes of harmony', Generosity, Honesty, Kindness, Laughter, and Loyalty. The sixth was not mentioned, what I could only conclude was a deliberate censoring. Although the amount of an attribute did not have to be huge, it did have to be significant, and losing the attribute completely renders ones element powerless, which was a problem, as all six need to be used at once in order for there to be any effect. Although one person could wield multiple Elements, Celestia is was the only person to wield all six, as trying would normally kill a pony. The elements were supposedly housed in the old castle Celestia and Luna used to share, which was overrun by the Everfree centuries ago. Despite the massive superstition surrounding the place, I knew there had to be some sort of anti-robber measure if they were to be still present. I doubted that would be my main problem, though.
I racked my brain. I did not qualify for many of the elements. There was a chance I could pass for Honesty, and perhaps, in time, Loyalty. I'd need to gather a group in order to use the elements. Applejack probably qualified for Loyalty, Fluttershy for Generosity or Kindness, and Pinkie Pie would probably do for Laughter. That still left two, including the unknown one, even if I could pass as Honesty.
At that point, the door opened. I looked to see who it was, and saw a purple unicorn mare with a mane of several purples and violets. She also had a purple and green humanoid reptile standing at her side.
Name: Twilight Sparkle
Race: Unicorn
Age: 1.92 * 10^8 half lives of carbon-15
Intelligence: 3567.4 Rellings
Language: Equestrian
Basic Abilities: Class 5 Sorcery
Name: Spike
Race: Dragon
Age: 1.56 * 10^8 half lives of carbon-15
Intelligence: 678.5 Rellings
Language: Equestrian
Basic Abilities: Firebreath, Message Transmission
Twilight glanced at the book I was reading, and immediately took it in her telekinetic grasp, "This is exactly what I was looking for! At this rate, I'll have this figured out in no time!"
"Hey! I was reading that!" I immediately disliked Twilight.
"Sorry. This is kind of important, save all of Equestria important. I promise I'll give it back when I'm done!"
"You're looking for a way to stop nightmare moon," I phrased it as a statement
For the first time, the unicorn gave me her full attention. I could tell she was used to always being the smartest and most talented person around. Despite my lack of background knowledge, I'd just have to be smarter.
"How much do you know?"
"More than you do, if you still need to read that book. You can't just go and get the Elements. You need a group of genuine friends in order to wield them, and I don't think you brought any with you"
At this point, the young dragon jumped up, "Ha! I knew Celestia was right when she told you to make friends!"
"Spike, that doesn't prove anything! Celestia said herself, it's just an old mares tale. I'm going to have to take this into my own hands"
I spoke up, "You really think Celestia doesn't know about the legend, if it is true? She was the one who banished her sister. Heck, she probably wrote the legend herself! Celestia told you to look after the various preparations, so that you could form a group of friends capable of retrieving and using the Elements!"
This took her back, and she had to think for several moments before responding, "You seem awfully sure of that for somepony who just made an argument for the legend likely being false"
"I have my own reasons"
"And those would be?"
"I'm glad you asked. You see, my eyes are significantly more perceptive than that of normal ponies. To my eyes, the moon is glowing as brightly as the sun. The only possible reason for that is if an immense amount of energy was building there. I estimate that it will be enough to destroy the moon, and rain flaming death upon all of Equestria tonight "
"Flaming death is not what the legend says, but you've already brought up that we can't rely on it. Alright. I'll go and... Try to make friends, I guess"
"I'll stay here and find what else there is to find here. I don't expect to get much, but I'll try, at least," I actually intended to spend the time versing myself on pony history and culture. Twilight was extremely literate, so the conversation had significantly boosted my reading speed.
So, as twilight left, I began to read, anxious of the impending doom of this world.
I hadn't leaned much. I knew the borders of the neighboring kingdoms, the personal quips of a scholar trying to study Alicorn magic, and some of the more well-known denizens of Tartarus, and about the terrible system that was vaguely comparable to old railways.
I had learned one valuable thing about the Elements, however. The Elements gave their bearers a powerful resistance to harmful magic. This resistance was so tenacious that there was even a documented case of the bearers of the elements leaving their own universe -without the Elements- and still being effectively immune to the hostile magic there. In fact, touching an Element, even once, gave a permanent measure of resistance. There were even cases of bearers having this resistance before even coming into contact with the elements, the resistance apparently reaching back in time. Although there were ways to reduce this resistance, namely by reducing the unity of the bearers, only a powerful being would ever be able to harm them with magic.
Before I could fill my head with any more useless knowledge, the door opened. I sighed, not at the interruption, but at the entree.
Pinkie Pie enter the room, "Hiya, Rekie! I had a hunch you'd be here!"
"You aren't being very surprising," I said calmly
"Not to you , maybe. I said I'd meet you at the surprise party, but I never said who would be surprised. You are going to help me set up a surprise party for Twilight!"
After she spoke, she began to pull tables and foods out of a small sack. As she did so, space warped . I suddenly understood why I couldn't identify her abilities earlier.
"C'mon, lazybones! Help me out! Even I can't set up something like this alone in an hour! The other guests will be arriving anytime now!"
I began to set up tables, plates, and various foodstuffs that would spill if stored in a small bag like the one Pinkie was using. Despite me doing almost nothing to actually speed the process, the work began being done at roughly twice the speed once I started helping. After about twenty minutes, ponies began arriving. I decided to not try to scan them all, as they continued filing in for some time. However, I did notice Fluttershy and Applejack arriving to the party.
About half an hour later, Pinkie Pie suddenly shouted, "She's coming! Turn out the lights, this is gonna be a good one!"
The lights were shut off, and a moment later, the door opened.
"I swear spike. All the ponies in this town are crazy! I'm glad to finally get a moment of—"
"SURPRISE!"
"Ugh"
***
Twilight seemed to be enjoying the party more than I had expected. Yes, she was having trouble enjoying anything with the end of the world impending, but Pinkie threw really good parties. I was impressed. Eventually, Twilight and a group of five other ponies, including Applejack, Fluttershy, and Pinkie Pie approached me. The two other mares were a white Unicorn with an amethyst mane, elegantly styled. The second one was a rough looking blue Pegasus with a rainbow mane. An athlete.
Name: Rarity
Race: Unicorn
Age: 2.04 * 10^8 half lives of carbon-15
Intelligence: 980.6 Rellings
Language: Equestrian
Basic Abilities: Class 2 Sorcery
Name: Rainbow
Race: Pegasus Pony
Age: 1.96 * 10^8 half lives of carbon-15
Intelligence: 1050.3 Rellings
Language: Equestrian
Basic Abilities: Flight
"These are my friends. Applejack, Fluttershy, Rainbow Dash, Pinkie Pie, and Rarity."
"I've already met Applejack, Fluttershy, and Pinkie Pie"
Applejack spoke, "Shoot, ya could've told us ya knew Twilight here. Would've made mah life that much easier"
"I didn't then. I just met her earlier today"
Twilight interjected, "I realize I don't actually know your name. We didn't have time for introductions last time we met"
"My name's Recumen"
"Huh. That's weird... I've never heard of that name, and I'm versed in all pony cultures. Could I have missed one? Could I just be forgetting—"
"I'm not from any culture you know. I'm from very far away. It's hard to explain, really. I'll do my best after the Summer Sun Celebration is over. Right now, I'm helping Twilight with some book-related stuff. It's not urgent, but I would like to speak with her later"
Rainbow Dash spoke up for the first time, "Ugh. Another egghead . One was bad enough"
Her remark earned glares from everyone else present, even Fluttershy. I decided being nice was not the best tactic.
"Oh, and being a jock is any better?" I got surprised glances from everyone except Pinkie Pie, who seemed to be merely enjoying the whole thing.
"Now that was not cool. If this weren't a party, I'd beat your face in right now!"
I ignored the frantic gestures from the other ponies "Normally, I wouldn't beat up a girl , but under the circumstances... You wanna take this outside?"
"Heck yeah!" Rainbow Dash was quite angry now
Once outside, Twilight felt the need to establish a few rules.
"Okay. This fight will go until one participant either yields, or is knocked unconscious. Injury is not allowed. Causing an injury to the other participant or a member of the audience will be grounds for immediate disqualification and loss. Now, Recumen, you go over there, and Rainbow Dash over there. Good. Now, on my mark, get set, GO!"
Rainbow Dash rushed me immediately. I quickly dodged to the side, and rapped her on the side of the head, a blow meant to aggravate. All of the audience was impressed by my quick movement, even Applejack, who had seen my physical speed and coordination the day before.
Rainbow Dash, after looking at me for awhile, began to fly in a tight circle. For no apparent reason, air began flowing along with her, creating a small tornado. The vortex began sucking in the air around it. I began pushing through my horn, desperate for something painful, but not deadly. After a second, a small bolt of electricity erupted from my horn and struck Rainbow Dash in the face.
"Hey! No magic!"
"Then why can you use your wings? Stop stalling and fight"
She rushed me again, and although I dodged to the other side, she was still ready. Although she was clearly aiming for my face, she struck me squarely on the horn.
The pain was nearly blinding. There was a time I wouldn't have been fazed, but I stumbled before regaining my footing. Unfortunately, Rainbow Dash was already making another vortex around me, the air current pushing me off the ground. I tried to fire another lightning bolt, but the pain heightened to unbearable levels, and I blacked out.
I had been unconscious for three seconds.
"Alright, Rainbow Dash wins! Now, let's get back inside and stop beating each other up"
I got up, and Rainbow Dash flew over to where I was.
"That was pretty awesome. Every other unicorn I've hit there has been on the floor screaming. Where did you learn to take that kind of pain?"
"Experience, mostly. I do feel like screaming, though. Why is my horn on top of my head, right in the most vulnerable spot? It's incredibly inefficient"
"Probably because most unicorns don't spend much time fighting me . So... You wanna go get something to drink later?"
"You do realize that this exact situation was what I was aiming for the moment I insulted you, right?"
"I kinda figured. Pretty cool, though. I've never seen a unicorn move that fast. You're like lightning!'
***
The rest of the evening was uneventful. I did get a chance to speak to Twilight about the little bit I'd found, and Twilight was hopeful that we'd be protected against a direct assault from Nightmare Moon because of the magic resistance, but other than hot sauce being confused with soda, nothing else of interest happened.
The interesting part began as we went to the Summer Sun Celebration proper.
Pinkie Pie was sitting next to me, "Ooh. This is so exiting!" she whispered the next bit to me, "This is my favorite part!"
"Pinkie. This is much more exiting when you are quiet!"
"Oh! Sorry!" She yelled the last word, and got several glares from around the audience.
The mayor began speaking: "In just a few moments, our town will witness the magic of the sunrise, and celebrate this, the longest day of the year! And now, it is my great honor to introduce to you the ruler of our land, the very pony who gives us the sun and the moon each and every day, the good, the wise, the bringer of harmony to all of Equestria..."
The curtains opened, revealing... Nothing. Disconcerting, considering Nightmare Moon had probably been released only seconds ago.
Rarity was the first to speak, "She's gone "
Pinkie Pie chose this moment to whisper to me again, "She's probably just hiding. I hear she's really good"
Then, a bluish vortex appeared, and when it dissipated, revealed a black Alicorn in armor. Nightmare Moon.
Name: Nightmare Moon
Race: Alicorn
Age: 1.29 * 10^10 half lives of carbon-15
Intelligence: 12057.4 Rellings
Language: Equestrian
Basic Abilities: Class 9 Sorcery, Flight, Immortality
Other Notes: If you do that again, I will kill you.
I hadn't made that note.
Nightmare Moon spoke, "Oh, my beloved subjects. It's been so long since I've seen your precious, little sun-loving faces"
The resulting uproar was significant, but interestingly, there were only two people who said 'Nightmare Moon' at all. The leading voice, however, was Rainbow Dash
"What did you do to our Princess?!"
Nightmare Moon seemed more amused than offended, "Am I not good enough for you? Although it is good to see that the Mentis Order still survives," she looked directly at me, "Nopony can stop me. You will never see your precious sun again. For, this day forward, the night will last FOREVER!"
"IDIOT!" I shouted over the roar of the crowd, "If you bring eternal night, Equestria will freeze, and we will all die. There will be no food, and you will be the last one to die of starvation!"
Rather than being fazed, Nightmare Moon began laughing, the blue mist around her mane and tail flowing, "If you ponies can't survive a little darkness, you should not have shunned me in the first place! I don't need food to survive, my banishment is proof enough of that. If eternal night kills the ungrateful ponies of Equestria, so be it. I will create a new empire, and I do not need anypony who cannot survive in it."
Although it seems obvious in retrospect, this is when I realized that Nightmare Moon was not just tainted with resentment and anger. There was a genuine mental illness behind this madness. I also realized exactly what the problem was.
'You aren't even Princess Luna, are you? You are a parasite , controlling the body and mind of the Princess to bring about your own ends!"
There was a brief internal struggle behind Nightmare Moon's eyes. Bingo.
"If your talents were not so valuable to me, I would strike you down for your insolence! However, you are correct. I am a parasite, and I am in control of the most powerful body in the entire world !"
This was when I decided to run.
***
"Are you really a member of the Mentis Order?" For some reason, this seemed to be the most important thing to Twilight at that time.
"Actually, no. I am telepathic, however. I assume the Mentis Order was an ancient group of telepaths?"
"Yes. I'm so exited that you exist, though! I'm so exited to learn about how to—"
"I'm not exactly keen on teaching," I was beginning to get annoyed
"You do realize that's how the Mentis Order died out, right? To picky with apprentices. The last master died before he could teach more than the basics to his apprentice"
Applejack interjected, "Ah think we should get to the matter at hoof, sugarcube"
"Right. There is only one thing that ever defeated Nightmare Moon. The Elements of Harmony. We need to get them, and use them"
Rarity spoke, "That seems like a long shot, but it beats freezing to death and starving, and Recumen so graciously put it"
Rainbow dash spoke next, "And it was so awesome how you insulted her in front of everypony, and she didn't dismember you. Not even a little "
Rarity responded, "It's horrible to think that Celestia's sister has been on the moon for a thousand years with that thing in her head. How awful!"
Twilight brought the conversation back on track, "Anyway. The Elements are supposed to be located in the old castle of the two sisters, deep in the Everfree Forest."
"The Everfree F-Forest? But it's haunted!" Fluttershy was trembling
"We'll be with ya, sugarcube. All of us. Together" Applejack put out her hoof, which was met with six others, although Fluttershy was understandably hesitant.
***
After a long, involved, and mostly boring journey, we finally reached the old castle.
Rainbow Dash spoke, "This castle looks pretty big. What part of the castle were the Elements supposed to be in, again?"
Twilight responded, "The book didn't say. Hopefully they won't be tough to find"
Luckily, once we entered the castle, there were several stone spheres on pedestals in the entry hall. Each sphere had a picture of a crystal on it.
I spoke, "Look out. If those are actually the Elements, there are undoubtedly protections on them"
Rainbow Dash flew over to one, and promptly picked it up without incident, placing it on the ground in front of us.
"What protections? Fluttershy, help me get the rest"
After gathering them all together, Twilight began counting them out loud, "One, two, three, four, five. Only five. We need six!"
At that moment, blue smoke came in through the windows, which coalesced into Nightmare Moon.
"Ha! You think you can defeat me?" She fired a blast of energy, destroying the stone spheres, and knocking over Twilight. Apparently, the elements did not protect themselves, "You will never see the sun again! Give up!"
Twilight got up, "Never! You may kill us all here, but together we stand here against you, as friends!"
At that moment, a sixth stone sphere appeared over Twilight's head, and descended, forming a crown. The stone fragments gathered into amulets around the necks of the other five ponies, but not me. Figured.
As Twilight began speaking, Nightmare Moon looked my way
"I may not be able to touch the bearers of the Elements, but I can still harm YOU !"
everything went black.
Pain.
Sometimes, when I am in a lot of pain, between the intense desire to scream, and the desperate attempt to fix the problem, I marvel at the sheer amount of pain I am in. I hadn't been in this particular amount of pain since the time I had been dipped in boiling oil to test my regenerative ability. However, rather than continue to marvel, I listened to the conversation around me.
"Can you heal him, princess?"
"Yes. Although his injuries are severe, nothing appears to be permanent."
There was a flash of light, and the pain dissipated. I was on a stone floor, in a large room. The old castle, where the Elements had defeated Nightmare Moon. The bearers of the elements were all looking at me, as well as a white Alicorn, presumably Celestia.
Name: Celestia
Race: Alicorn
Age: [BLOCKED]
Intelligence: [BLOCKED]
Language: [BLOCKED]
Basic Abilities: [BLOCKED]
I got up, "Jurer'f Yhan?"
Celestia became very pale, and Twilight gave her a confused expression.
"What's wrong with him, princess? Will he be okay?"
Celestia lowered her head, "No. I recognize this curse. It is very old, and very powerful. Centuries ago, both me and Luna learned the curse in order to find a way to cure it, but were unsuccessful. I never thought..."
Twilight interjected, "The first thing you taught me about magic is that everything that can be done can be undone, but that it is merely more difficult"
"That is the same thought we had when we approached learning the curse. To avoid discussing detail longer than necessary, the curse edits reality so that any language exiting any consciousness matching a certain pattern is scrambled, preventing communication of nearly any kind. It must have taken all of Nightmare Moon's strength to cast it."
Twilight was about to respond, but Pinkie Pie interjected, "So Rekie won't be able to talk anymore?"
Celestia took her interruption in stride, "No. The curse is permanent and incurable. The curse does not actually dwell within the cursed, so magical screening and typical counter-curses do not work. Even moving your mind into another body will not cure it. I will search again, but I am not hopeful."
"DARN IT!" Pinkie Pie yelled, "Rekie told us he'd tell us who he was after the Summer Sun Celebration!"
Celestia addressed me, "I will ask Luna to visit your dreams tonight. You will be able to communicate freely with her there. She will ask you several questions about who you are, and what you know, followed by answering any questions you may have"
Twilight spoke, "Another point, princess. He called himself Recumen, a name I don't recognize. He did say he was not from any place I would have heard of, but perhaps you have?"
"I have not heard that name before. He could be from somewhere I have heard of, but is merely using a made-up name, however."
I nodded, and then waved my hoof in an uncertain gesture.
Twilight was hopeful, "So you're from somewhere the princess may have heard of?" I hesitated briefly before shaking my head, indicating I wasn't completely sure, "But your name is made up?" I nodded.
Celestia spoke next, "This is all very interesting, but I suspect the interview with Luna is likely to be much more productive. Do you have any other questions, my faithful student?"
"There is one thing. Princess, I just met all of these friends, but I'm going to return to Canterlot. I just learned the value of friendship! It's not fair to have to leave it behind."
Celestia smiled, "I though you would have noticed by now. A section of the upper study of the Ponyville library is permanently reserved as a bedroom."
Twilight's eyes widened, "Thank you princess! Thankyouthankyou—"
I stopped paying attention to Twilight as Applejack started speaking, "Do ya know where yer going to be staying tonight? If ya don't have anywhere else, we have a guest bedroom available, as long as ya earn yer keep."
I shrugged, then shook my head. Where I slept had very little effect on my quality of life, and even in my mute state, I felt my time would be better spent on things other than farm chores, although Sweet Apple Acres was probably one of the few places I could work in my current state.
"Suit yerself. But there's always space for anypony with the strength and willpower to carry their own weight"
As we began leaving, Twilight approached me, "I know you don't have a lot of experience with magic. You barely knew how to cast a spell when you fought Rainbow Dash, and Fluttershy says she didn't see you do any magic at all. Anyway, if you would like, I could teach you about magic, and how to use it."
I didn't have any way of conveying that I would be a frustratingly good student, seeing as how I didn't even need to be taught something to learn it. I decided a simple nod would probably do.
***
When I got back to Ponyville, I did several things. First I bought a wallet (after cleverly disguising the fact I had been storing my money in my stomach), and then I went looking for a place to build a house. I wasn't intent on doing it immediately, of course. I was merely scouting for where to build one once I learned enough magic to construct one by myself. I decided it would be best to put it in the Everfree Forest, because, although most ponies were too superstitious to enter it at all, let alone live there, it was technically unowned land, not on Equestrian soil. As a result, I could build a house there without having to do any preliminary work other than clearing vegetation where necessary. I decided it would also be preferred to build it on top of a source of magic, although not necessarily a large one.
After several hours of searching, I found the place I was looking for. About a quarter-mile into the forest, there was a hole that went directly to an underground cave containing a large pond that radiated energy I now recognized as magic. Although I didn't know the exact nature of the pond (I wasn't stupid enough to touch it), I suspected I would figure out how to draw magic from it eventually.
The lesson with Twilight was in the late afternoon. And although I learned all types of magic quite well, I was particularly good at two types: illusions, and teleportation, though for different reasons.
My skill with illusions was merely because of greater focus. I had —through genetics, and superior brain structure— much more attention to give to things such as illusions than most people. While even a trained mage would need to concentrate fully to maintain a complicated illusion, I could hold very nearly as many illusions as I wanted without any trouble. Needless to say, there were many applications for this.
I was good with teleportation because of an improvement with the technique. The usual spell for teleportation slams two portions of space-time that are not in each others light-cone[1], and pushing themselves from one spot to the other. This causes a blast of excess energy, which needs to be redirected with a second portion of the spell, creating a bright flash and a loud bang. The consequences of not using the second portion properly include, but are not limited to: nausea, dizziness, amnesia, minor and major burns, minor and major brain trauma, and death. My version slows the impact of the two portions of space-time shortly before impact, almost completely eliminating the excess energy. My teleportation is accompanied by a light shimmer and a soft hum.
The lesson ended shortly before the time I had decided I would fall asleep, in preparation for the upcoming visit, so I ended up sleeping like a hobo.
[1] a light-cone is the concept that any point in space-time can only affect —or be affected by— a limited number of other points in space-time. For example, two points at either sides of the galaxy, even if they were hundreds of years apart, would not be in each others light-cone, because even light would not be able to cross that distance in that amount of time. The teleportation spell requires that the two points not be in each others light-cone, which, due to the immense amount of energy required to travel long distances, and the amount of excess energy produced by such a transportation, means that one cannot travel significant distances through time with this spell. Theoretically, if one were to jump across the world (quite a feat), they would be able to travel nearly half a second forward or backward through time. Due to the negligibility of this amount, most mages completely ignore the time aspect of the teleportation spell.
I waited in my dream, with a chessboard in front of me. The chessboard wasn't really for anything, I just wanted to have my hands (hooves) occupied during the conversation, to look cool.
"We see thou wast expecting us."
I looked up, and saw Luna. I hadn't seen her before, as I was unconscious when she had been cured. She looked... Malnourished wasn't quite the word. It was obvious she was very weak; unsurprising considering the harshness of the Elements. I tried to scan her, but she was blocking me.
"I was told to. I believe you wanted to ask me some questions?"
"Yes. Our sister did give us a list, but she also directed us to learn anything else we could about you."
"Lovely," I moved a piece on the board, and turned my focus to her, "Let us begin"
"Firstly: Wilt thou stop that?"
"What are you talking about?"
"You continue to poke our mind, and it bothers us."
"Sorry. I do that to everyone I meet to learn about them. Just a habit"
"In that case: Stop."
"Alright."
Luna continued to regard me slightly suspiciously, "Secondly: Where art thou from?"
"That one is fairly complicated. What is the name of this planet?"
"Earth."
"That makes this even more complicated. I'm from another planet, but we also call it Earth. Let's call it 'Terra' for now."
"Very well."
"I was created using a process involving genetic code by a group known as the Foundation. I was created highly intelligent, and with the ability to alter my own body at will. Eventually I left Terra so that I could pursue my dreams without being forced to serve masters I hated."
"We can understand that. But thou said thou wast created? Thou hast no family?"
I moved another piece, "none whatsoever. Just because some of the people there taught me what I know doesn't mean that I have any bond with them. Also, I would like you to not tell my friends, I would prefer to tell them myself after I cure this curse. "
"You seem very sure of your success."
"I've faced more complicated problems in the past. My current lack of resources and faculties is merely a complication."
"Thou hast an over-inflated ego, but we will honor thy request. Next question, what was your occupation?"
"I was a creator. I built things. The place I came from had no concept of magic, so everything we built had to be technological"
"How did thou travel to Equestria without magic?"
"To even begin to answer that, I need to know what the most technologically advanced thing you have is."
"Somepony created a basket that flies because of a large capsule filled with heated air."
"The most advanced thing you have is a hot air balloon. What if I told you that I knew of a way to make a wagon-like object move on its own?"
She scoffed, "Bring to life spells are both short and unreliable. Any use for them other than novelty would be new to me."
"I'm not talking about magic. I'm talking about technology. Imagine a fire. This fire grows bigger when you put things like wood onto it. We've found better fuels, but imagine that the fire is solely burning wood. Around this fire is a device that collects the heat from the fire, and turns it into motion. This motion is is used to power a wagon, so that it moves without needing to be pulled."
"Interesting. Most ponies would still prefer to pull a wagon, rather than constantly fill it with wood."
"We don't use wood, though. We have even built machines that can not only fly, but travel several times the speed of sound."
"Sound has a speed?"
"Yes. The best way to find the speed of sound is to watch lightning. The sound of thunder comes after the lightning because the sound is slower than the light."
"Impressive. Have you build anything that can travel faster than light?"
"Actually, traveling faster than light is impossible with technology. That seems to be one advantage magic has."
"We see. And how many other limitations dost thou take for granted that magic so easily ignores?"
"A few. I haven't had the time to properly examine the differences. But just imagine a train that did not have to be pulled, rather have the fire fed by a single pony."
"We are not trying to ignore the possibilities of technology. We are simply doubting the value of abandoning magic in favor of it."
"Of course you shouldn't! I want to explore the capabilities of using magic and technology together. Imagine a train that a single unicorn could power, without even trying. Imagine devices that allowed any two ponies to communicate freely, no matter their location. Imagine something that could take you to the stars!"
"Why would we want to go to the stars?"
I retraced my mental steps, "That brings a question. What are the stars?"
"Stars are elementals, whose souls were bound to the sky long ago."
"Better question. What is the sky?"
"The dome that surrounds Equestria, that holds the sun, moon and stars."
"What is beyond the sky?"
"We... Do not know. We know that in dimensions other than space and time reside other worlds, but we don't think anypony has ever questioned what is beyond the sky."
And idea occurred to me, 'Where I come from, both the sun and stars are immense balls of energy, millions of times larger than our planet."
"That is very hard to believe."
"Just hear me out. I've been racking my brain as to the source of magic. An immense amount of energy is constantly entering the world through various forms of magic. What if the sky was placed inside one of these balls of energy, and magic is simply what is being gathered through it?"
"Who would do such a thing? Nopony would just put something like the sky inside a 'star' without using the gathered energy for their own purposes."
"What if they are? I don't know the details, but if this Earth is completely artificial, that would explain many things."
"We will have to think on this further. However, there are still things we wish to know about you. Why did you come up with the name you did?"
"I made up a name because I was never given one. I was always referred to by a number, and I don't identify with my current name anymore than I identify with my old one. If someone said 'Nightmare Moon' when they saw you, you'd know they referred to you, even though you don't identify with the name. It's the same with me, except I don't have a 'real name'."
"Interesting. Just a few more questions; when thou first came upon this world three days ago, you became a pony—"
"Explaining how would literally take years."
"That wasn't our question. Twilight said you were capable of very basic magic when she met you, and that you learned other magic frighteningly quickly."
"That's simple. I got the knowledge from observing her mind, as well as inventing a little myself."
"We also understand you have reconstructed the theory for several spheres of dark magic."
I was genuinely surprised, "How did you learn that?"
"From you, now."
That was embarrassing, "I see. Although, I would like a good definition of what exactly counts as 'dark magic'. "
"That seems quite obvious to us."
"How about this. I say something I could do with magic, and you say 'no' if it's okay, and 'yes' if it's forbidden."
"Very well."
I began moving a piece every time I spoke, "Firing a beam of energy into a wall."
"No"
"Heating up a block of metal until it melts."
"No"
"Heating up a pony until they melt."
"Just because it isn't dark magic doesn't make it not murder!"
I acknowledged her statement with a nod, "Heating up parts of a ponies brain, causing permanent brain and personality damage."
She was clearly shocked, "Such a thing is possible?" I nodded, and she shuddered, "in that case: Yes"
I returned to less dark territories, "Creating a shield around myself"
"No"
"Creating an invisible shield around my skin, making myself effectively invincible"
"No"
"Drawing on ambient life force to do the same"
"Yes"
"Creating a barrier that a certain monster or demon cannot cross."
"No"
"Creating a barrier that only I can cross"
"Yes"
Interesting, "Spreading the contents of my mind across my body so that I can recover from even a severed head."
She thought for a while, "No"
"Placing my mind inside an object so that I can survive the complete destruction of my body."
"Yes"
"Magically increasing the endurance and healing capacity of an individual, making its death much more difficult to carry out."
"Yes"
I stopped moving pieces, "Really?"
"All forms of healing are in the sphere of 'blood magic' which is forbidden to all but a few select unicorns, chosen by Celestia."
"Interesting. There's also the obvious stuff, like soul stealing and necromancy."
"Yes. Do you have any questions of your own?"
"Actually, how much math do you know?"
"Math? We mostly know addition, subtraction, multiplication and division. Mostly useful for finances and statistics"
"So you have no concept of engineering and physics?" I already suspected they didn't, as I hadn't found the words, so I had to use the English versions.
"No, we don't believe we've heard of those before."
"Math can be useful for many different things. For example, you can use math to find exactly how much force each part of a building or bridge needs to hold, so you can plan for it."
"Interesting. Pony architects simply increase the strength of walls and bridges magically until they no longer tended to fall apart."
"In that case, we're going to have to start from the beginning. First, I'm going to give you a rundown of the Laws of Thermodynamics, some fairly general rules about how objects interact with other objects. The Zeroth Law of Thermodynamics states that if any two objects are in thermal equilibrium —meaning that there is no net heat exchange when they are in contact— with a third object, they must be in thermal equilibrium with each other. This means that temperature is absolute, unlike some other parts of existence, such as space and time, which are relative."
"Do you mean to say that our observation of time may be different from thine, but not the temperature?"
"Yes. Although it is very difficult to alter space or time in a very noticeable manner, your position and speed can slightly alter the rate at which time passes."
"Interesting. Forgive us, but it seems quite obvious that temperature would work that way. Also, why is it called the zeroth law?"
"For your first question, while the laws of thermodynamics are fairly intuitive, they aren't a basis for calculating the behavior of anything on their own. Their main purpose is to give some ground rules as to how the world does and doesn't work. As for the second, it was added later, but was considered so rudimentary they called it the zeroth law."
"Please, continue."
"Alright. The First Law of Thermodynamics states that whenever energy enters or exits a object, the energy inside that object changes accordingly, meaning that energy cannot be created or destroyed. The Second Law of Thermodynamics states that the amount of entropy in interacting objects will increase. Entropy is the amount of energy that cannot be used. For example, if a room got warmer, that room would have more energy. However, you can't do anything with ambient heat. It's useless."
"Thou art not only saying that the amount of available energy cannot increase, the amount of available energy will always decrease? That is a... Frightening concept."
"Indeed. The third law states that the colder something gets, the less entropy there is, but it hardly alleviates the concept that everything will end eventually."
"Could we speak of something more... Practical?"
"Very well. I will teach you how to calculate the height something reached when it was tossed in the air solely from how long it was up and how hard you threw it."
"We were hoping for something more practical than that."
"You need a basic understanding of these things in order to get to the really practical stuff, but with the time amplification of dreams, and the intellect possessed by both of us, we should be getting there soon."
"We see."
"First, you need to start with basic units. Numbers, although useful, mean nothing by themselves. 46.4 * 12.8 means nothing if you don't have the values they represent. You following so far?"
"Yes."
"We need units for thing like distance and time. Distance is measured in d . The base value is a meter, which is about this big," I created a line a meter long, "However, it doesn't actually matter what unit you use—"
"How could it not matter? Changing the number you are working with changes the outcome completely!"
"No, not really. All that's important is that you use a unit that measures the distance between two points. The formulas I am about to teach you will work even if you use a completely different system. If the number you get is in miles, you may just have to do a couple extra steps to make sure you get a correct answer. It's somewhat complicated, but it works."
"In that case, continue."
"Time will be t and measured in seconds," I provided a quick reference, "There are many others, but that is all we need for now. Of course, we still need a couple of other things, speed for example. Luna, how would you define speed?"
"The distance covered in an amount of time. We don't see how... Oh. We art beginning to understand why thou enjoyest math so much."
"Absolutely! Instead of speed, velocity, or v , is generally used, as the direction of the motion is included in velocity, and that is important. Velocity, can be defined as d /t , because the amount of distance divided by the amount of time will always be the same. However, we still don't have all the parts we need. We still need acceleration, or a , which is the change in velocity over time—"
"That would be d /t /t , correct?"
"No. You see, the division in that case goes from the bottom up, so you would divide t by t , and then divide d by the result, which is not what we want. Rather we use d /(t * t ), or d /t ^2. ^2 means multiplied by itself, which we will get into later."
"Why wouldst thou multiply t ? We were dividing."
"Think of it this way. If you divide twenty by two, you get ten. If you divide that ten by two, you get five. However. multiplying two by two gives four, and twenty divided by four equals five. This isn't a coincidence, it always works this way."
"It is impressive to see how many loopholes thou manages to find in basic logic."
"Wait until you see the quadratic formula. Anyway, now that we have acceleration, we can finally write the equation. d = do + vot + ½at ^2"
"What doth the little 'o' mean?"
"That means 'original', or the value you start out with. xo is the height you start at when you throw the object, which you can probably ignore, and vo is the velocity at which you throw the object. Now to solve the actual equation. Since you want to find out how far the object went at its peak, you can halve the amount of time that it was in the air, since it spent the same amount of time going up as down. The acceleration from gravity is 9.8m /s ^2. Lets say it was in the air four seconds, and was going at two meters per second at the start. We can then use this equation to learn the height. Would you like to try?"
Luna only needed seventeen seconds to solve the equation, impressive considering she probably had almost no math training. I estimated her at roughly 9000 Rellings, just above my own current intellect.
"Twenty-three point six."
"Very good. I'm impressed you got it so quickly, and without paper."
She was obviously proud of her achievement, but didn't let it go to her head, "We request you continue to teach us math, that we may understand this 'engineering and physics'"
"How would you like to learn about pressure?"
"We are intrigued."
***
"Kinetic energy is equal to ½mv ^2, so—"
"Dost that mean that each increase in velocity takes more energy than the last?"
"Yes it does, and here is an explanation of why: Say you have an object flying through space at a certain speed, and it gets bumped. The object ends up going slightly faster, but the acceleration was perpendicular to the original velocity. Say the original velocity was ten meters per second, and the acceleration was one meter per second. Because of the Pythagorean Theorem —a^2 + b^2 = c^2—, we can find that the end velocity is only barely above ten meters per second. The extra energy didn't disappear, it just takes a lot more energy to get from ten to eleven than from zero to one."
"Although we find this conversation interesting, we grow weary of it. Perhaps we can continue another time. Is there anything else you wanted?"
"Do you play chess?"
She smiled, "Yes, we do. And we are quite good at it."
"This is my own variation on chess. The original chess weighs too heavily on analyzing every possibility and predicting against them. I wanted something that requires you to act on instinct and exercise your intuitive logic skills. I give you: six-dimensional chess."
"Six dimensions? How is that possible?"
I brought up the board, "At first glance, this board seems three-dimensional, but you have three buttons, each of which exchanges your x , y , or z axis for the xi , yi , and zi axis, respectively." I made a rule book appear in front of Luna.
After reading for a while, she spoke, "This likens normal chess to tic-tac-toe!"
"Complexity is the point. Fair warning though, you will lose very badly. And you will lose again. You will keep losing until you get better, and eventually you will become expert. It's not a quick process, but I promise it will hone your mind quite a bit."
***
"Twenty-three moves."
"Do not say that as if it was impressive. You completely defeated us!"
"I beat most people in eight on their first try. Most don't get to twenty-three until their twelfth game."
"It does not feel impressive."
"Do you want to play again?"
"Not really."
"Let's go!"
—5 Games Later—
"That was actually really impressive."
"The fact that thou took forty seven moves to defeat us?"
"No, the fact that I wasn't able to use tricks designed to take advantage of your inexperience. You're still a long ways away to beating me, but you've progressed quite a bit."
"We'll end it on a high note, then," she said dryly.
"When I wake up, I won't be able to talk to anyone. I'll only be able to communicate in charades, unable to effectively communicate anything more abstract than verbs. Besides, I haven't actually been able to teach anyone anything before."
She smiled, "Thou art a strange pony, Recumen. But I also believe thou art a very good one. I very much hope thou can manage to overcome the curse and live thy dream, and that thou can fill the world with the wonders of technology either way."
I was impressed she had abandoned the royal we, "Luna?"
"Yes?"
"Once the citizens of Equestria get to know you as you visit their dreams, I believe they will grow to love you even more than your sister."
"Thank you. That means a lot to me."
And she left.
DAY 14
Town Square usually doesn't see much use. It's used to present awards, made speeches, and is the common location of traveling shops and shows. It was being used for the latter purpose today.
The show had gathered a surprisingly large crowd, and the mare running the show was blue with a silver mane. I went forward to get close enough for a scan.
"Come one, come all! Come and witness the amazing magic of the Great and Powerful Trixie! "
She shot off several fireworks from her horn, and several props on her stage began to spin around and spray sparks, along with a small fanfare. Interestingly, despite them obviously being illusions, they still released a small amount of heat, although smaller than what a normal firework would. My desire to get a scan increased.
"Howdy pardner. Come to see this filly show off her 'talents'," Applejack was beside me, close to the front of the crowd, looking distainfully at Trixie
I was genuinely confused. I was here because the show was interesting. Besides, it was her job to boast to the point of outright lies, There was no way she expected anyone to actually believe her. I decided to do what I could to prevent Applejack from making a scene, and placed a question mark over my head.
"Ah don't see what's so confusing about this. This here 'Trixie' is makin' a fool of herself, as well as the rest of the town! Ah won't stand for this, and neither will anypony else!"
I was pretty sure everyone else was here because the show was the only interesting thing in a year to happen that wasn't also interested in killing and/or eating everyone. I made a large, red, blinking arrow, pointed away from the stage, and gave her an accompanying glare.
Applejack looked slightly uncomfortable, "Ah'm on break right now, with Big Mac making up for his injury. There's nothin' interestin' to do right now."
So she was enjoying the show, despite the fact that she was complaining loudly about how it offended her sensibilities. Ugh.
After a couple more minutes of weaving through the crowd, I finally managed to get close enough for a scan.
Name: Trixie Lulamoon
Race: Unicorn
Age: 2.37 * 10^8 half lives of carbon-15
Intelligence: 1230.4 Rellings
Language: Equestrian
Basic Abilities: Class 4 Sorcery
It was at this point that Trixie addressed my friends who were complaining about her 'boastfulness', "Well, well, well, it seems we have some neighsayers in the audience. Who is so ignorant as to challenge the magical ability of the Great and Powerful Trixie? Do they not know that they're in the presence of the most magical unicorn in all of Equestria?"
I could clearly see Twilight in the audience. I felt sorry for Trixie.
Unsurprisingly, Rainbow Dash was the one to speak up, "Oh yeah? What makes you think you're so great?"
Trixie kept her cool. Apparentely, she actually got this reaction a lot. I decided to begin research on how pony psychology differed from that of humans.
"Because only the Great and Powerful Trixie has magic strong enough to vanquish the dreaded Ursa Major!"
She did the fireworks and fanfare again. I stopped listening to her to concentrate on my friends (I could no longer fully concentrate on two things at once). They had expressions ranging from annoyance to disgust. I was torn between curiosity and annoyance at those reactions. Thankfully, Neither Pinkie Pie, nor Fluttershy were present, as I suspected the former would wreck everything, and the latter would just cry, which would not make anything better.
Trixie said something interesting, so I turned my attention back to her, "I challenge you, citizens of Ponyville. Anything you can do, I can do better. No takers? Is the Great and Powerful Trixie destined to be the greatest equine who ever lived?"
She must have been very exited to show off whatever she was doing. Curious, considering that she appeared to only be an illusionist, albeit a strong one.
Applejack was the first contender. She did a few fancy tricks with a lasso, grabbed an apple from a nearby tree, which she propelled into her mouth and promptly ate. Trixie, however, tied applejack up with the rope using telekinesis, and stuffed a much larger apple into Applejacks mouth, effectively gagging her. I was intrigued that nobody called Trixie out on not technically following the rules. The audience must have just not cared, which was supported by the intense cheering and laughter.
Rainbow Dash was where it got interesting. She went up into the sky, and when she came back down, she had a rainbow 'halo' over her head. Trixie took the halo, and wrapped it around Rainbow Dash, twirling her in a circle repeatedly before dropping her into the middle of the crowd. She wasn't just an illusionist. She created illusions, and then used the resulting pattern of light to create something with pseudo-reality. Interesting.
Trixie proceeded to humiliate Rarity with the use of an illusion placed on her hair. I don't mean to sound cruel, but I was finding the show quite enjoyable, and placed a three bit donation in the slot upon the end of the show.
***
I stayed up late that night, creating enchanted stone blocks to build my house out of, when something large walked by. It was roughly ten meters tall, which was impressive, considering that it was a quadruped. Two young ponies were running away from it, and I suddenly realized this creature must be the 'Ursa Major' Trixie had mentioned. I wished I had spent more time reading about random crap like that, and less time creating stone blocks for a house I didn't even really need until I had the magical expertise to do something interesting.
I followed the creature, and, sure enough, the kids let it straight to Trixies stage/trailer/house. I got there in time to hear the resulting conversation."
"What are you doing here? And what is that noise? The Great and Powerful Trixie needs to sleep."
"We brought an Ursa Major! We wanted to see you vanquish one!"
"Are you out of your minds!? What did you think bringing an Ursa Major here would accomplish?"
"We wanted to see you vanquish it!" The two colts said in unison.
I didn't even bother scanning them for their Relling count. I honestly did not want to know.
Trixie was shaking now, and the creature was only fifty meters away, growling and roaring. I was genuinely impressed she wasn't running for her life.
"Okay. I have a plan."
Trixie took the rope, and tied it around two of its toes. At first I was confused as to why, but while it was distracted, she summoned the illusion of a massive lightning bolt. Unfortunately, while the light and sound were impressive, the small jolt it did receive angered it rather than intimidated it. It roared louder, but Trixie charged up another spell. She conjured up the illusion of another, slightly larger Ursa Major, which roared at the original. Unfortunately for her, while the creature was intimidated, it swiped at the illusion, shattering it. The creature stepped on her house, and at that point she began running for her life. Good call.
I decided that Spike's ability to contact the princess was probably our bet hope in this situation, and began seeking him out.
"Rzretrapl! Rzretrapl!"
"What's going on?" Twilight was leaving her house, along with spike.
Before I could do anything, the two colts that had brought the thing here showed up, "We brought an Ursa Major here!"
"What!? "
"Don't worry the Great and Powerful Trixie will vanquish it!"
At this point, Trixie arrived, "Nopony can defeat an Ursa Major. It was just stage acting. And because you two didn't realize that, my house is gone, and soon, so will those of everyone else who lives here!"
The two colts stared at her for a full two seconds processing this new information "What?"
Twilight spoke up, "Don't worry. I know what to do."
"If the Great and Powerful Trixie cannot defeat it, what hope have the likes of you?"
Twilight began to gather the largest concentration of magical energy I had seen since nightmare moon, and perhaps the mirror-like pool underneath my house. She literally picked up the creature, gathered all the milk in Ponyville to put in a water tower with the top cut off, played a soothing melody, and moved the creature back into the forest.
Rainbow Dash was the first to speak, "That was amazing!"
Applejack was next, "We knew ya had talent, but nothing like that!"
Twilight was blushing now, "So you don't hate me?"
Everyone except me, the colts, and Trixie responded, "Hate you?"
"I know how much you hated Trixie showing off, I was worried you would feel the same way about me."
Just to note here: This is what I really dislike about Twilight. Not that she rambles, not even that she considers me the most amazing discovery in history and won't leave me alone sometimes. She knows she's better than you. She knows she's smarter and more talented, and takes it for granted, but if you try to compliment her on it, she tries to cover it up by saying that she really isn't any more special than anyone else. She even believes it's a good thing to act that way. Modesty needs to be moderated just like everything else, especially when it's mostly just on the surface.
Rarity spoke, "The problem with Trixie was her attitude. She was deliberately showing off to impress others. Showing your natural talents is a good thing, and we all apreciate you for it."
Spike spoke up next, "How did you know how to defeat that Ursa Major?"
"After Trixies boast, I decided to read up on the Ursas. That was just an Ursa Minor. A baby."
"That was just a baby ?" Trixie exclaimed. I was surprised she hadn't spoken before then.
Spike spoke, "If that was just a baby, what's an Ursa Major like?"
Twilight laughed, "You don't want to know."
Trixie looked like she was about to explode, "You may have vanquished an Ursa Minor, but you will never have the ability of the Great and Powerful Trixie."
That was when I decided to leave and go do something else.
***
"What are you doing?" Rarity was next to me, watching as I gathered the scraps of Trixies old house.
It was pretty obvious to me, but I displayed a crossed hammer and wrench, to see if that would get the point across.
"You want to fix her stage? After everything she did?"
"Bu, ernyyl?" I gave her a glare that communicated my extreme dislike of the comment.
"What? Trixie humiliated me, Applejack and Rainbow Dash!"
I continued to glare.
"Well, I suppose she only did it after we directly challenged her. But if it weren't for her, we wouldn't have been attacked!'
I moved my right hoof counterclockwise, which I did whenever I wanted someone to elaborate
"I suppose she did make an illusion of another Ursa Minor to scare it off, even if it didn't work. What about how rude she was?"
I raised an eyebrow.
"I suppose I didn't actually have to see the show. And I suppose a lot of the audience did enjoy it, " she sighed, " I guess I'll tell the others about that. I hope you succeed at fixing the stage."
After buying a large quantity of lumber from the Apple farm, I began fixing the cart. I decided to include some 'magitech', a concept I had invented, and meant technology run by magic. Luna had come up with the term.
***
I found Trixie sitting at the edge of a pond, staring into the water.
When she heard me, she spoke, "Go away. Trixie does not want to be around other ponies now."
I took of the harness for the cart, and it made a thump as it hit the ground.
Trixie turned around, "Is that... My stage?"
I nodded. As she walked in, I sent a beam of energy into the magitech receiver, and the whole thing lit up.
"I... don't know what to say. Why did you do this?"
I opened my mouth and pointed at my throat, a gesture for muteness.
"You can't talk? Oh. Did you just do this to be nice?"
I actually wasn't sure why nodding still worked. It did, though.
She seemed to have trouble processing that, "...Nopony has ever been nice to me before. Thank you." She cleared her throat, "Trixie will remember this service you have done!"
There was an awkward silence before she spoke again, "This is still my house. I would appreciate it if you got out. Trixie still has not slept very much."
I left with a smile on my face and a spring in my step.
Discord, whatever did we do?
DAY 126
"His name... is Discord." The eight of us (me, my six friends, and Celestia, who was speaking) were in an ornate hall in an obscure part of the castle. In front of us was an ornate door, locked by a mechanism I didn't recognize.
Twilight perked up, "I've heard of Discord. Is he behind the weird things going on?"
Some really odd things had been happening over the past day. Although stuff was happening pretty much everywhere, I was dealing with cream soda floods at my house, which had gone into my basement after I opened the door. I doubted much of my equipment had survived it, but I hadn't had time to look before being summoned to Canterlot.
Celestia's face was grave, "Yes. You need to use the elements to stop him."
Rainbow dash spoke, "What about you? Didn't you use the elements against Nightmare Moon? Why do we have to be the ones to use them?"
"The elements are not designed to be used by a single pony. Using them alone, and especially against my sister who had previously wielded them with me, nearly killed me, and destroyed my ability to use the elements at all. That's why I arranged for you to get the Elements in order to combat Nightmare Moon."
I didn't comment that the plan had turned out sup-par for me.
Celestia inserted her horn into the lock. Patterns on the door began to glow, and it opened after a couple seconds.
"Impressive." Applejack said.
Inside the room was a single box, decorated with many gems of various sizes. She picked up the box with her magic.
"This box contains the Elements of Harmony. They are the only thing that can harm Discord."
As the box opened, Pinkie Pie gasped, "They're invisible!"
"What? No, they..." Celestia looked horrified as she gazed into the box, "DISCORD! "
An eerie laugh began to emanate from the walls. It was especially creepy since the sound came from literally every surface in the room, including the inside of my own ears
"You should see the look on your face! I went through all that trouble of getting through the wards without setting alarms just for you! Don't you like it?"
Celestia had obviously conversed with Discord before, and didn't like it.
"Stop playing games! You're just as insufferable as you were a thousand years ago!"
"I forgot how boring you were. Not really, considering I heard every boring speech you made from the castle over the last thousand years. You did that on purpose, right?"
I was getting fed up with useless conversation, "Jung qb lbh jnag?"
The voice stopped for several seconds, before returning.
"Oh ho! You didn't tell me that little curse still existed, Celestia. Quite interesting. As the spirit of chaos, I can actually understand you. Funny how that works, eh?"
"Pna lbh pher vg?"
"Probably, but as they say: Just because you can, doesn't mean you should. I don't usually listen to nonsense like that, but it seems appropriate in this situation. Anyway, for the sake of our resident pony princess, I'll make this brief. A riddle for the location of the elements. How does that sound?"
I could tell that Celestia was just about ready to explode, only restrained by her desire to learn what little Discord was willing to tell.
"I'll take that a yes. Here we go. To retrieve your missing Elements, just make sense of this change of events. Twists and turns are my master plan. Then find the Elements back where you began "
The moment the speaking stopped, a mind altering field sprang into existence, both immensely powerful, so as to affect Element bearers, and incredibly subtle, so even Celestia was likely to not notice. Discord was right not to try to cure my curse, the cheater. All in all, though, I was actually quite impressed with the skill and power he possessed. I had no reason to think we were capable of beating him. Maybe I'd have to find a way to talk him down, since he could understand me.
After a few moments of conferring, Twilight had an idea, "The maze! That has twists and turns! The elements must be in there."
It took a lot of effort to fight the mind-altering field enough to not wholeheartedly agree, and I was conscious of it. Although I didn't doubt the Elements were in some sort of 'beginning', probably the old castle in the Everfree Forest, I doubted I'd be able to prevent myself from following the group.
When we reached the maze, Discord was sitting there. He radiated a completely different spectrum of energy than any other object I has seen before, and much more brightly. I guessed his form of magic was completely incompatible with mine, and vastly superior too. When we reached the entrance, Discord spoke.
"Before we start, I'm going to lay a few ground rules," his voice no longer echoed, due to it now originating from actual vocal cords, " First: No wings, no magic, " As he said this, he snapped, and all horns and wings on the party disappeared, an incredible display of power, especially against the bearers of the Elements, "We don't want any foul play. Second. No slackers. You all have to play, or the game is over and I win."
"Jul ner lbh rira obgurevat?"
Discord laughed, "Because it's funny, of course! You don't have any chance of winning, since I'm using magic and you aren't, but you still try. Nothing amuses me more than mortals frantically trying to achieve what they can't."
I sensed another motive, but I didn't argue. We all hesitantly entered the maze.
Twilight spoke, "Don't worry. Nothing can stop us as long as we're togeth—"
Hedges sprang up, blocking the exit and separating each member of the party.
Twilight's voice was much more nervous now, "Alright, meet in the center. We'll regroup there."
I continued along the path, running much faster than any of the others possibly could have. Discord had taken my horn, but I still had my enhanced strength.
After a couple minutes however, I ran into Discord.
"Guvf tnzr pna'g cbffvoyl or whfg sbe ragregnvazrag. Jung vf vg lbh ner gelvat gb qb?"
Discord sighed, "You are perceptive, I'll give you that. How about this: I tell you the purpose of this game, and then I do whatever I want to you. How's that?"
"Qb V unir n pubvpr?"
"No, you don't have a choice. Anyway. The Elements grant their bearers massive protections against magic, including mine. However, If I can 'encourage' a small demonstration of the opposite attribute their Element represents, I can cause the Element in question to completely forsake its bearer, giving me the ability to mess with their mind at my pleasure."
That was scary. I knew firsthand that the bearers were quite far from perfect in their representation of their elements, one or two passing only by an uncomfortably small margin.
"However, you do not have the protection of an Element. Guess you picked the short straw, huh? Good news though, after I mess with your mind, your curse won't be able to recognize it, and you'll be able to speak again."
Discord touched me on my forehead, and my priorities and emotions became unstable, and began changing.
***
"Recumen, are you alright?" Twilight entered the chamber I was in.
"I'm fine. You?"
"You can talk! At least one good thing has come of this mess."
"Good for me, maybe. Good overall? Hardly."
"...What do you mean?"
"I can hear four of your friends outside, and from what they're saying, they aren't quite themselves. Discord got to them. What do you think would change if Discord affected my mind?"
"You'd become dumber? I don't know. What did he do to you?"
"My intelligence didn't change. I'm still at a solid sixteen thousand Rellings. What did change are my morals . No, that's not quite the way to describe it. Before, my goals were towards helping others, and improving the world around me."
"You want to destroy the world?"
I laughed, "No, of course not. I'm just completely, one hundred percent selfish now. If this version of myself is somehow exterminated, and the old me returns, I want you to know one thing: all of the things you see me do, he was capable of as well. Just because he hid his ruthlessness from you doesn't mean it isn't there."
"Why are you telling me this?"
"Because I don't want to have to explain this in a more stressful situation. Also, I don't want you do to anything that would force me to kill you. I like you, sort of. As long as you stay that way, and out of the way, you can live." I have her a look that I knew was absolutely terrifying.
Twilight was trembling then, just a little. Good.
I changed the topic. No sense in scaring Twilight beyond rationality, "I hear wings. Rainbow dash must have gotten hers back."
Only a couple of seconds later, the entire maze disappeared, and Discord was sitting on a tall throne overlooking everyone present.
"Looks like somepony broke the no wings, no magic rule. Too bad. I guess now—"
"DISCORD!" I shouted for his attention.
"What is it? I already gave you your voice and your selfishness, what else do you want?"
"I propose an alliance. I'm going to rule this planet eventually, and I want your support."
Discord sighed, "I thought I was the one destined to rule. Why would I give you the throne?"
"You don't want to rule, you want to play. If I keep a planet wide empire, there won't be anywhere people will come from in order to use the Elements against you, and anyone who tries to overthrow me will have to answer to you. You need my support for safety, and I need yours for stability."
Discord feigned boredom, but couldn't hide his interest, "And what would keep you from betraying me? With the vast power you would accumulate, you would no doubt find something that could defeat me."
"Why would I? No matter the plan involved, attacking you would be risky, besides—"
"Could you save your chatter about global domination until later?"
Twilight was standing in front of me, with an expression both angry and determined, "Why weren't the Elements in the maze?"
Discord looked exasperated, "Recumen already figured that one out. I never said they were in the labyrinth. I don't know why they call it a labyrinth, though. I've seen corn mazes more complicated. Anyway, they're hidden in a completely different place."
Twilight stared at both of us for several seconds before leaving, probably to have an argument with anti-fluttershy or anti-pinkie.
After Twilight left, I addressed Discord one last time, "Oh, and another thing, Discord. The original me... we should give him a name."
"How's Rumplestiltskin?"
"I like that. Anyway, if Rumplestiltskin gains control again, he will kill you. He doesn't take lightly to tampering with his head."
"Why would he? He didn't kill the people who did that before."
"Didn't he?"
I felt Discord rifle through the contents of my brain, "So he did. If that's the case, and I was even worried about him succeeding, why wouldn't I just kill you to remove the threat?"
"Because I'm very helpful to you. If something happens to you, Rumplestiltskin will be in control again, and I don't want that. As a result, I will do what I can to prevent you from being stopped. Besides, you don't like killing people, do you Discord? I'm just pointing out that letting him get in control again would be very bad for both of us."
"You make a tough case. Very well, I'll attend to chaosifying this place, and you'll take care of the bearers. I've already done most of the work, but Twilight is still in control of herself."
With that, Discord left. I had a few ideas for discouraging Twilight. I still didn't want to kill any of them. The feeling was odd, it didn't fit. I didn't think too much on it, but a small part of me still cared about them, so I decided to try my best to find nonlethal tactics.
***
"FINE! Leave! See if I care! I don't need you guys either!"
I coughed.
"Oh, hey Recumen. These ponies are just so insufferuble! My friends have all become complete jerks!"
Good, "To put it simply, they aren't the same people. I came here because I was wondering if we could hang out sometime. Eat some food, play some games. Maybe have sex later, perhaps?"
Twilight was startled and horrified, "What? No! Ugh, you're even worse than the rest of them!"
As twilight left, I chuckled. There was no way she'd be willing to gather her friends against discord at that point. The next step was to find something in my house capable of taking care of the princesses, but first, I decided I'd pay anti-fluttershy a visit.
On the way to Fluttershy's house, Twilight and Applejack approached behind me. I immediately put them inside a shield.
I saw Applejack, and the new determination she possessed, "I see you've found something that can cure Discord's influence. I'm this close to crushing you into pulp, Twilight. Just because I prefer you alive doesn't mean I'm not going to kill you if you force my hand."
Twilight's voice was muffled through the shield, "I'm the element of magic. Do you think you can kill me with a shield?"
I gave my creepy smile again, "Of course. I've learned all the magic you know from your mind directly, and my time tinkering with my own genetics has not come without benefits. I'm much more powerful than you, Twilight. If you know what's good for you, you will give up now and let me wipe your minds. I'll bet Discord will have something for you to do."
Twilight began to cast a spell I didn't recognize. I tried to collapse the shield to crush her, but it was too late, the spell created massive psychic reverberations, and I couldn't concentrate enough to cast anything.
"You think Celestia would have taught me without knowledge of how to protect my important secrets? I know a good deal of dark magic, none of which was ever accessible to you. Did you know there is a slightly necromantic spell that perfectly imitates the wail of a banshee?"
I was desperate at this point. I knew that if Twilight managed to apply whatever cure she had cooked up, I would lose control of my mind, to forever put the needs of others above my own. I couldn't cast spells, but I was still the strongest pony for my size I knew of. I rushed at Twilight, but I underestimated the mental fortitude of Applejack, who kicked me squarely in the side.
"We don't mean to hurt ya, sugarcube. This'll only take a second"
I burst several glands throughout my body. I expelled a mix of several potent gaseous neurotoxins out of my mouth, directly at Twilight and Applejack. Unfortunately, I had told Twilight the nature of these glands before, and she teleported the air between us to a different location.
I tried another, more desperate tactic. I broke my own forelimb, and pushed the jagged edge out of my leg to form an impromptu 'claw'. (a trick learned from the aptly named horror frog) My highly dense bone structure made it even stronger than a similar weapon made of steel.
I swiped my new tool at twilight and applejack, forcing them to back off. I inserted several contact poisons into my spittle, and started spraying it at the two. Twilight didn't have much power leftover from the spell she was using to disrupt me, but she was able to summon a weak shield to block it.
Twilight started charging a new spell. The cure must be usable at a slightly longer range than my claw, and with one less leg I was unable to rush her faster than she could back up or Applejack could knock me aside. I decided on one, final tactic. I sang.
Fun fact about telepathy. It needs some sort of wave carrying it in order to function. Normally, brainwaves are used, as they are already synced to your brain activity, but brainwaves have very little power, and cause a comparatively small effect. Electromagnetic radiation (light) is unfeasible since many frequencies cannot go through a skull, and the entire spectrum must be used to be effective. So, obviously, sound is the most effective option. I don't recommend learning how to sync singing to your brain activity, as it took even me five years of practice. Once done properly, however, you send out a massive force of raw psychic energy to those in earshot. This overload of psychic power has proven one hundred percent lethal to any who hear if for more than ten seconds.
Twilight, however, immediately stopped the wailing spell, and focused everything she had on the cure spell.
***
"Sugarcube, ya might wanna have that leg looked at."
Applejack and Twilight were standing over me worriedly. I remembered what had happened. Fortunately, I had managed to prevent the other me from using lethal force until the end of the fight, when it was too late.
"Fbeel nobhg gung."
Twilight was exited, "You can't talk again! Wait, that's not what I meant. You aren't trying to kill us anymore, is what I meant."
I telekineticly placed my leg over the jagged bone break, and got it into some semblance of healability. It would be a couple days before I'd be able to use it at all. I missed the times I could heal something like that in a matter of hours, but it was what it was.
Twilight gave me a worried look, "Recumen, is it true what the other you said? That you are capable of doing all of those things too?"
I considered it for a moment. Certainly, it would be preferable for the ponies of Equestira to think of me as friendly and harmless, but I knew that the time for ruthlessness would come, and that I didn't want to be held back by that image then. Also, I fully intended to kill Discord. The prison the Elements had created before was fallible, and so would the next one. When Discord escaped again, and if my mind was corrupted a second time, it would be far less likely for the situation to be reconciled. That, and there was a considerable amount of personal anger. Despite this, however, I wouldn't kill Discord until I had a reliable way to do it, and since the prison would likely last another thousand years or so, there was no point in trying in the near future. I knew that it would happen eventually, however.
All this thinking took merely a half second. I waited long enough for it to seem truly hesitant, and nodded.
Twilight sighed, "I suspected so. That doesn't make you a bad friend, just a dangerous one, I suppose. This is probably a bad time to bring this up, but Luna just published that book based on your work."
Applejack interrupted, "Well, we're gonna have ta find the rest of the bearers in order to defeat Discord It's nice Recumen is back to his old self, but if he gets corrupted again, we're not going to have nearly as much of an easy time of curing him."
I nodded. Just because my toxins were almost depleted didn't mean I wasn't highly dangerous, especially if I decided to sing again.
***
Over the next couple hours, we managed to cure the rest of the group without much incident. Although Fluttershy had to be restrained, and Rainbow Dash was difficult to track down, we soon had the entire group.
Rarity was the first to speak after the group hug, "What's our next move, Twilight?"
Twilight responded, "We have the Elements, and we have the bearers. Discord is hanging around in Town Square, and we have the tools to defeat him. Let's go!"
It was only a short walk to Discord's throne, a tacky red-and-black chair that was floating about four stories above the ground. When Discord saw us, he looked mildly surprised.
"I see you're back together, and that Rumplestiltskin is back in control of his body. I'm dissapointed. I thought he'd take care of the bearers like he said he would."
"Vg'f zl zvaq. Rira jvgu uvz va pbageby, V fgvyy unq vasyhrapr," I retorted.
Discord yawned, "You may have the Elements again, but you missed one important thing," He reached out his magic towards me, and it stopped.
He looked very surprised, "What? How is that possible? You aren't one of the bearers!"
I decided that if there was any time for a monologue, this was it, nobody to hear the cheesiness except for my target, "Gur Ryrzragf qba'g jbex gung fvzcyl. Orsber, gur Ryrzragf qvqa'g fryrpg zr orpnhfr V jnfa'g ernyyl sevraqf jvgu gur bguref. Abg ernyyl fhecevfvat, pbafvqrevat gur ynpx bs nal xvaq bs nssrpgvba V unq va zl bgure yvsr. Ubjrire, V'z ortvaavat gb ernyvmr jung sevraqfuvc ernyyl vf. V qba'g arrq gb unir na Ryrzrag gb zlfrys gb or cebgrpgrq ol gurz. Nyy V arrq vf gb unir gurfr crbcyr nf zl sevraqf!"
"Ugh, that made Celestia's speeches look nice by comparison."
And that's when the Elements hit Discord, and turned him to stone.
DAY 243
That night, I had a nightmare where my mind was torn asunder, and I forgot who I was.
DAY 244
I woke up in my bed. For a moment, I had an intense sensation of wrongness, as if I were not where I was supposed to be, but it passed. I got out of bed.
"The approximate value of Pi is 3.1415926353."
For some reason, I relished speaking more than I should have. I pushed the thought aside, and started getting ready for the day. After eating breakfast, and tidying my room, I decided to get back to studying. However, I quickly realized that I was unable to remember what I had been studying.
"Spike, do you remember what I was studying last night?"
Spike wandered into the room, "Not really. You usually don't tell me about that sort of thing. I vaguely remember you doing something with the Elements"
"You're usually a good deal more helpful than that. Are you sure that's all you remember?"
"You don't forget stuff like this, Recumen. Something's going on"
I thought about that for a while, "Something is going on. If there's some sort of memory dampening thing going on, I'm going to have to interview more people. Spike, run the library while I'm gone."
"Yes sir!"
As I went down the stairs to the library proper, I saw the Elements, all seven of them, in a display case. I must have placed them there last night in order to run some sort of experiment on them. The idea that it may have caused the memory problems crossed my mind, but it had affected spike, so that theory was obviously incomplete. When I looked at them, I again had an intense feeling of wrongness, as if something were not right. After a few moments, the idea that I should take the Elements with me entered my mind, and I decided that would be a good idea.
As I left the library, I decided to visit Twilight first, even though she lived farthest away.
***
As I approached Twilight's house, a large black square in the middle of the Everfree forest, I hear a ruckus. The automated door let me in, and as I entered the house, I saw the lab was on fire.
"Twilight! Are you okay?"
Twilight exited the lab, and looked in my direction, "Oh, thank goodness you're here! One of the CEMS tanks caught fire!"
"How did you get one of the Compact Energy and Magic Storage tanks to catch fire?"
Twilight had the decency to look embarrassed, "I forgot what I had been working on lately, so I started tinkering with one of the pieces of equipment, which released a large thermal charge. I tried to direct it away from me, but it hit the tank, and..."
"Alright, let's go."
As we began to fix the problem, I got a sense of rightness, directly contrasting the sense of wrongness I'd had in the library. As we sealed the damaged tank, I found the device that had cause the problem. It had been my experimental wormhole generator. I immediately reconciled the thought; it wasn't mine, it was Twilight's.
After putting out the fire, and repairing the tank, I began to organize the lab. As I did so, the sense of rightness continued to grow. When I had finished organizing the lab, something inside of my mind started acting. I quickly realized that it was using my telepathic abilities on Twilight. I was paralyzed, the thing in my mind holding enough control to keep me from doing anything, but not enough to move anything itself.
After a few moments, Twilight took her own Element, and placed in around my neck. When she did so, the person I had been only a moment before dissolved, and the real me took control once again.
"That was weird, " After hearing myself talk, I came to a startling conclusion, "I can talk!"
Twilight looked confused, "Of course you can talk. And why do you have my cutie mark?"
The image on my flank is called a 'cutie mark'. Each mature pony in Equestria has one, but they are mostly of cultural and personal importance, although they tend to display the ambitions and talents of an individual. In this case, I had just recovered from having my memory altered, and apparently it had something to do with me and Twilight swapping cutie marks.
"Twilight. Write a letter to the princess."
She looked confused, "Why would I do that?"
"Just do it. You'll see."
Twilight took a piece of parchment, and began writing. Her expression changed from anxiety, to confusion, and finally to confidence. After she displayed the last emotion, I placed the Element of Magic on her head.
After a few seconds, Twilight became lucid again, "What just happened?"
"I'm not quite sure."
"Wait... You can talk, I remember remembering being you, and you have an Element?"
"Now that I can talk, you know what I want to do right now?"
"Uh, no."
"I want a piano. Ever since I got telekinesis, I've wanted to play some songs. With some other assorted instruments, I could play almost anything!"
"You're a weird pony, Recumen."
"Just the way I like it. Anyway, now that I can talk, are there any burning questions you want to ask me?"
"When I talked to Luna about you, she mentioned six-dimensional-chess, but couldn't explain the rules. She said she'd become somewhat proficient at it."
As I responded, we began to walk out of the house and toward Ponyville, "She has. But the point of the game is that your brain cannot comprehend either the rules or the board of the game. The point is to become proficient at acting in situations you do not fully understand or know about, but still picking the best course."
"That's interesting. I suppose we should get to curing everypony else then?"
"Certainly"
The strange affliction had been caused by Twilight tampering with the Elements, as I had predicted, although the rest of the bearers didn't directly switch, rather 'rotated' cutie marks in the pattern Fluttershy ---> Rainbow Dash ---> Rarity ---> Applejack ---> Pinkie Pie ---> Fluttershy. We repeatedly got each to do things they didn't remember they were good at, and then exposed them to their Elements. Most of the conversations were fairly similar to that with Twilight, although, ironically, Pinkie Pie (who we got last) had the most constructive questions.
"Wow. That was weird. Rekie, what's your Element? Also, you can talk! Cool!"
I didn't quite know how to respond to that, "I'm not actually sure. Twilight, do you know?"
Twilight thought for a moment, "The spell on the Elements seems to have affected the past. That's why your curse was cured. The magical protection of the Elements was retroactively granted to you. It still leaves a lot of questions as to exactly how the Elements and time work, but back on topic, " She teleported The Elements of Harmony: A Reference Guide in front of her, and flipped it open, " Let's see. There are seven Elements: Generosity, Honesty, Kindness, Laughter, Loyalty, Magic, and Responsibility. Looks like you, Recumen, are now the honorary Element of Responsibility. Congratulations!"
After a moment, Twilight spoke again, "Oh! I just had an idea!"
She ran into the library, and picked up a black and silver tome I didn't recognize, and began writing in it.
After finishing she spoke, "From one to another, another to one. A mark of one's destiny singled out alone, fulfilled, but from all of us together, together we're friends. With the marks of our destinies made one, there is magic without end!"
I can't claim to understand what that spell did, or why it did what it did, but the Elements began to glow. After a second, a blast of energy shot out of each Element, including mine, towards twilight. After a moment, the blast of energy vanished along with Twilight, leaving a six-pointed star engraved on the library floor.
It was several seconds before Rarity spoke, "Did we... Kill her?"
I spoke next, "It looks like whatever happened was fueled by the matter in Twilight's body. I think we did."
Several minutes passed before Applejack spoke, "Ah'm gonna go home to process what just happened. I need just a little bit of normal right now."
We began filing out of the library, but, before we could get far, a bright light appeared, which coalesed into Twilight, except she was several centimeters taller, and... had two large wings.
"You have wings?!?"
"You're an Alicorn? How is that possible?"
"You look like a princess!"
"She is a princess." That last comment hadn't been from any of my friends, but from Princess Celestia.
A few present hastily tried to bow to Celestia, but most just listened
"A... Princess? How could I be a princess?" Twilight said.
"Of course you are. What do you think I've been preparing you for, Twilight?"
"I kind of thought you were preparing me to use the Elements of Harmony."
"That too. But there were always meant to be more than two princesses ruling in Equestira, and Cadence was always destined for the Crystal Empire. You've learned a lot about being a friend and a leader Twilight, and you are an inspiration to us all."
Celestia bowed to Twilight, as did everyone else present. I bowed a little less than even Celestia did, "Eh, I have problems with authority. Has to do with my childhood. You'll always be an equal to me, Twilight."
After a quick chuckle from several ponies present, including both Twilight and Celsetia, Twilight spoke, "Anyway, weren't you going to do some big concert or something tonight?"
As we began getting things organized, Pinkie Pie approached me, "Rekie. You promise you'd tell us. Who are you?"
I shrugged, "I'm an alien."
"Cool."
