Chapters “ . . . and ANOTHER thing! Don’t expect me to pick up your room! I don’t care if you don’t have enough time. MAKE some time! I’m not going to pick up any of your trash. Oh, and while we’re talking about trash, let’s discuss your flying . . .”
Fluttershy stared at the ground. Her mother towered above her, which made her look even more menacing than she already looked. The skinny yellow filly tried to block out her cruel, heartless voice, but she had no luck. It cut through her head, chilling her to the bone.
“ . . . can’t even get off the clouds. I can tell you, if you want to get a colt when you get older, you’d better learn how to fly—and fast. No colt wants a mare who can’t fly. And don’t tell me that you’re going to marry a unicorn, or—Celestia forbid!—an earth pony. You are going to keep this lineage going. Don’t launch into some lecture about how pony genetics don’t always work out that way, because I don’t care. We’re not going to take any chances. We don’t want another flightless pegasus like you . . .”
Fluttershy didn’t understand why her mother was always telling her not to do or say something. She barely said anything, so why did her mother get the idea that her daughter was going to suddenly start being rude? Then again, on her mother’s bad days, nothing she said made sense.
Most days were bad days.
“You’d better be listening to me,” snapped her mother. “If you’re not listening . . .” She left her threat hanging.
Fluttershy swallowed hard. “I’m listening,” she whispered, bowing her head so she wouldn’t have to look her mother in the eye.
“You’d better be. Oh, and speak up when you talk to an elder. It feels like you’re disrespecting me when you whisper like that. You don’t want to disrespect me, do you?” She didn’t allow Fluttershy to answer. “Oh, what was that? You do want to disrespect me? Well, if you’re going to disrespect me, it seems fair that I’m allowed to disrespect you.” She raised her hoof.
Fluttershy squeaked and backed away. “B-but, I don’t want to disrespect you . . . I didn’t mean t-to, Mommy . . . wait—”
A dark yellow hoof hit her in the face, just below the eye. Fluttershy cried out. She could already feel the bruise beginning to form. Her mother raised a hoof for another punch when there was a noise. They both froze.
“Celestia, I’m tired. There was an accident with the snowflakes breaking, and then there was a big order for a blizzard in Manehattan—” Fluttershy’s father broke off as he saw what was going on. His wife was standing over his only daughter with a hoof raised. His daughter was cowering and fighting tears with a big red mark under her left eye. He might not be the smartest pony in Equestria, but it didn’t take a genius to figure out what was going on. His eyes widened. “Oh, Celestia.”
Many things happened at once. Fluttershy’s mother and father began yelling at the same time. In a daze, Fluttershy felt herself being picked up in her father’s strong arms. He raced up the stairs into her room, threw her onto her bed, and ran out. Before disappearing completely, he came back in and locked the door, then slammed it fiercely.
Fluttershy lay, trembling, on her bed. It grew dark, but she didn’t dare move until the yelling had ceased. When all was quiet, someone knocked on the door. She opened it a crack, in case it was her mother coming to hit her again. But a furious yellow mare didn’t greet her. A tired-looking blue colt looked down at her, exhausted.
“May I come in?” he asked. His voice cracked, as if he was going to cry. Fluttershy silently opened the door a little wider.
He stood awkwardly in the middle of the room for a while, unsure what to say. Finally, he sighed and sat down next to her on her bed. “I’ve enrolled you in summer flight camp.”
Fluttershy looked at him, startled. That didn’t seem to be the most important issue right now.
He elaborated. “Mommy’s been having a rough time. She needs some help right now, and it’ll take up so much time that we won’t be able to spend any time with you. So I’m enrolling you in flight camp—just for this summer. And if you want to spend more time there, we can enroll you year-round.” Fluttershy didn’t respond to this at all.
Her father exhaled. “Flutters, has this . . . has Mommy been hurting you like this for a long time?”
Fluttershy pondered how to answer this question. She knew that she should tell the truth, but sometimes a lie could be kinder. Besides, how long was “a long time?” A week? A month? A year? A thousand years? She slowly shook her head.
“Can you answer me out loud?” her father asked gently.
“Not a long time,” she said in a voice just barely above the sound of the night breeze outside.
They sat there for a while, her father struggling with what to say and Fluttershy wishing that she could just be alone. Eventually, he sighed and got up, slowly walking to the door. When he left, Fluttershy locked it. Maybe if she locked it, she would be free from all the terrible thoughts haunting her.
She crawled into bed. Before turning out her lamp, she looked at the picture on her nightstand. In it, her mother was laughing at something her father had said. Her lavender eyes were crinkled with happiness. She cradled something small, yellow, and delicate in her hooves—a baby Fluttershy.
She felt her throat tighten up as she looked at the picture. She ran her hoof over her mother’s face, then ran her hoof over her own. She winced when she touched the bruise. How was it possible that the laughing mare in the picture was the same mare who had yelled at her and hit her?
She looked at this version of her mother sadly. She turned off her lamp and used the light of the moon to continue staring at her. She often talked to the picture, hoping that her words would carry to her real mother. She said more to the picture than she did to real ponies! But tonight, she only whispered five words.
“You’re going to love me . . .”
“Fluttershy, correct?” asked the mare sitting at the registration desk.
“Yes,” sighed her father. His pale blue coat had gotten even paler in the last few days, and his mane was dirty and tangled. He hadn’t gone to work since the “incident,” as it was now being known, happened. The mare eyed him suspiciously, but she slid a form over the table to him. He picked up a pen in his mouth and signed his name.
“You’ll be in cabin one,” she said flatly. “This is your first year, right?” Fluttershy didn’t move, so her father sighed and answered that, yes, this was her first year. “Wow. Most fillies and foals start a few years younger than you, so they’re great flyers by the time they get as old as you. I’m sure that you’ve been teaching her at home?” she asked Fluttershy’s father.
He coughed. “Actually, I’m busy most of the time, and her mother is, well, busy most of the time as well. So she hasn’t gotten many flying lessons.” Fluttershy refrained from correcting him and saying that she hadn’t gotten any flying lessons.
The mare rested her head on her hoof, as if she had a headache. “Well, we’re pleased to have you here, Miss Fluttershy,” she said. Her tone suggested the opposite.
As Fluttershy walked away with her head down, she tripped over a loose cloud and fell flat on her face.
“You sure your name’s not Klutzershy ?” a foal called from behind her. She picked herself up and looked behind her. There was a tan foal with a shaggy mane that hung over his eyes. Behind him were two similar-looking colts with different coats.
Fluttershy blinked. He took this as a cue to continue. “I’ve heard that earth ponies are clumsy. You sure that you’re not an earth pony?” His followers let out similar grunts of laughter. “Hey, I’ve been watching you since you came here. I haven’t seen you fly once. Maybe you are an earth pony!”
“I’m not an earth pony,” whispered Fluttershy, a sensation of dread washing over her. This was worse than when her mother was angry. When she hit Fluttershy, she wasn’t laughing. The foal’s laughter was ringing in her ears.
“What’s that? Speak up, Klutzershy.” His friends laughed even harder. “Did you say that you want us to test your wings? Are you sure? Well, if you really want us to . . .”
“Hoops, come give your mama a big hug!” crooned a middle-aged mare. She scooped him up in her arms, giving Fluttershy a chance to escape. In the air, she noticed that he already had his cutie mark—three basketballs. How many ponies had their cutie marks here? She began to breathe faster.
“Are they your friends?” asked her father, catching up to her. Fluttershy hesitated before nodding. Take me with you, she begged him silently.
He didn’t catch her silent message. “Well, Flutters . . .” Another silence descended between them. After a few moments, he realized that she wasn’t going to say anything. His daughter had always been quiet, but she had turned mute since the incident. “I’ll write you once a week,” he promised. She shrugged. He looked around, as if looking for something that would inspire conversation. “Have fun. Make friends,” he said bluntly before handing her her suitcase and flying away.Now what? she wondered. She spotted a cabin with a large number one at the top of the doorframe and assumed that it was cabin one. She didn’t want to enter—there were probably other ponies inside—but the brown foal had escaped from his mother’s embrace and was heading towards her again. Without looking back, she sprinted into the cabin—and immediately wished that she had watched where she was going.
“Hey! I’m walkin’ here, idiot!” shouted a rough voice. Fluttershy whimpered as she took in the sight of what she had bumped into.
She had heard of griffons before, but she hadn’t seen any. According to her father, they were pretty rare, but they occasionally mingled with ponies. With the body of a lion, the head of an eagle, and huge wings, Fluttershy quickly realized that if this griffon wanted to get physical, a skinny yellow filly didn’t stand a chance.
“I’m sorry, I didn’t mean . . .” The rest of Fluttershy’s sentence dissolved into incoherent mumbling. Head ducked, she tried to run past the griffon, but it blocked her path.
“I don’t know what you do where you live, but here, we’re supposed to watch where we’re going.” The griffon continued to block Fluttershy’s path. “Well? Are you going to apologize?”
Fluttershy opened her mouth, but nothing came out. The griffon was beginning to get impatient. When Fluttershy didn’t manage to speak, the griffon clenched her claws, drew the fist back, and—“Girls!” shouted the counselor. “While you two were busy chatting, everypony was spending their time finding bunks.” She rolled her eyes. “Well, looks like you two are going to be bunkmates.”
“No!” protested the griffon. “There is no way in Equestria that I’m going to bunk with that dorky excuse for a pegasus. I want to be with somepony who—”
“No buts,” said the counselor. “You already had a long conversation with her, so I assume that you’re already the best of friends. Now go.”
Gilda grumbled something about “lame” and “not friends” and “annoying,” but she complied. She flew up to the top bunk without asking Fluttershy—not that Fluttershy would have been able to take the top bunk anyway. None of the bunks had ladders. As Fluttershy delicately put her suitcase beneath her bunk, someone tapped her on the shoulder. It was the griffon, hanging upside-down from the top bunk. She drove a claw into Fluttershy’s forehead. “You are so dead,” she said softly, giving Fluttershy a glare that would have made the bravest pony cower.
“Gilda!” snapped the counselor. The griffon—Gilda—snapped back up to her bed as if nothing had happened.
Fluttershy stood frozen for a long time, her heart pounding so hard she was sure that Gilda could hear it. She thought of the letter she could send home for her father:
Dear Daddy,
Flight camp is terrible. While you were gone, a foal made fun of me and came up with a stupid nickname: “Klutzershy.” About a million ponies laughed at me. I just walked into a griffon called Gilda, who I am bunking with. Did I mention she wants to kill me?
Love, Fluttershy
Maybe she’d hold off on the letter-writing for now.
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At their first dinner, Fluttershy was standing in line with a tray when Gilda butted in front of her.
“Excuse me . . .”
Gilda ignored Fluttershy. Of course she did. It seemed to Fluttershy as if everypony was ignoring her at this camp.
“Hey, Klutzershy!” called a familiar voice.
Of course, sometimes being ignored could be very nice. Especially compared to being called a name and having everypony stare at you.
“Hello, Klutzershy,” said Hoops in a mocking tone. “I’m hungry, aren’t you?” Fluttershy nodded, assuming it was the right thing to do. “Well, I’m really hungry. I don’t think I want to go all the way to the back of the line.” He gestured to the snaking line of young ponies. “You won’t mind if my friends and I cut in front of you, will you?” He didn’t wait for an answer before he and his friends stepped in front of her.
After what seemed like an eternity of waiting, Fluttershy gratefully took her tray of hay fries and alfalfa. She scanned the mess hall and found a mostly-empty table. As she made her way towards it, she tripped over a table leg and found herself, once again, flat on her face.
“Really living up to your name, Klutzershy ,” Hoops taunted her. Her face burned bright red. Tears began to gather in the corner of her eyes, threatening to spill out. They blurred her vision so much that she didn’t notice a certain griffon walking in on the scene.
“Come on, guys, that’s not her name,” said Gilda. Fluttershy’s head jerked up, her eyes still brimming with tears. What? Was she actually— “Everypony knows that her name’s Fluttercry.”
All four of her tormentors began laughing. Fluttershy couldn’t help it—she began to cry. Why were they being so mean to her? What had she done to them? A few ponies from nearby tables began to giggle when they heard her nicknames.
Gilda strolled off and called to a friend at a nearby table. “Hey, Rainbow Dash, check this—”
“Leave her ALONE!” screamed a cyan filly with a rainbow mane, zooming up next to Hoops. Fluttershy sniffled and blinked to clear her eyes. Who was that?
“Well, if it isn’t our good friend, Rainbow Crash ,” said Hoops. Fluttershy had to wonder why he had gotten his cutie mark in basketball—he seemed to have a special talent for coming up with names. “So you want us to leave Klutzershy alone? What’s it to you?”
Gilda seemed surprised that her friend was standing up for Fluttershy instead of laughing at her. She quickly realized that Rainbow Dash didn’t find these jokes funny, and she joined Rainbow's side. “Shut up, jerks,” said Gilda, shoving them. “C’mon, Dash, let’s bail.”
Rainbow Dash glared at Hoops and his friends before turning to Fluttershy. “Are you all right?” she asked, her voice full of concern. Fluttershy nodded. Before Rainbow Dash could say anything else, Fluttershy grabbed her tray, forgetting that her hay fries had spilled, and sprinted to the empty table. When she looked back, Gilda was pulling Rainbow Dash away from the bullies. She shot a glance at Fluttershy that the yellow filly couldn’t quite read. Was she angry? Was she jealous? Fluttershy could tell that it wasn’t a positive emotion.
Fluttershy frowned and stared out the window. If she had to choose between home and here, she was almost certain that she’d choose home.
But then again, at home, there was nopony to protect her from all the pain and misery she felt. There was nothing to look forward to, nothing to hear but the screams of her mother. And here, there was a rainbow-maned pony, one who stood up for her. One who was friends with Gilda, but still.
Fluttershy knew that there was no hope that Rainbow Dash would want to talk to her again. She had plenty of ponies (and one griffon) at her table that were laughing at a joke she had just made. Still, when she climbed into bed that night (later than everyone else, because she had been last in line to brush her teeth), she felt herself thinking of Rainbow Dash again. Instead of whispering to the picture of her mother, she whispered to the bottom of the bunk above her.
“I wish to see Rainbow Dash again.”
Just kill me now, Celestia, thought Fluttershy, miserably hiding in her cabin. She knew that she was supposed to be at her flight lesson, but none of the counselors were in the cabin, so she figured it was fair game. Besides, the flight lessons weren’t going to help her fly. She’d already discovered that she might as well be an earth pony with big, ugly wings sticking out of her back.
She punched her pillow with her hoof, and immediately felt bad. It wasn’t like the pillow had done anything to her. Truthfully, the one she really wanted to punch was Gilda. Hoops would be fine, too, but Gilda was the one who invented a second horrible nickname for her. Besides, she was always hogging Rainbow Dash, squashing the small chance there was of Rainbow Dash talking to Fluttershy.
She really won’t want to talk to me after tomorrow, thought Fluttershy, her stomach flipping. She tried to push the thought out of her mind.
Mr. Cloudy, the flight instructor, had announced yesterday that they would be putting their skills to the test in a couple days. They would stand on some high clouds and try to fly through hoops—in front of everypony. Fluttershy was certain that Mr. Cloudy was just doing this so he could laugh while Fluttershy fell to her doom. Her doom wouldn’t be the impact of the fall—falling onto the clouds was like falling in a big pile of cotton candy. No, her doom would be when everypony crowded around her and laughed until they couldn’t breathe, pointing at her and calling her Klutzershy.
The thought of that made her ill. That was it; she had to get some fresh air. She stumbled out of the cabin and took deep gulps of fresh air. In the distance, she could see the other ponies flying through hoops and joking with each other. A lump formed in Fluttershy’s throat. How were they able to talk so easily? Didn’t they know that the pony that they were talking to would soon turn on them, soon call them names, soon . . .
Fluttershy instinctively raised a hoof to feel her bruise. It was almost healed, but if she pressed on it, she could still remember exactly how it felt when her mother’s hoof drove into her face.
She swallowed hard and bit her lip, pushing all thoughts of her mother out of her head. Instead, she focused on the hoops in the distance. There was a small rainbow blur zooming through them. Instead of stopping at the flag, like others had, the blur kept on going further. Fluttershy squinted. It looked as thought it was coming closer to—WHAM! Fluttershy was knocked back by the force. Dazed, she simply lay on the clouds instead of getting up. Sitting up was too much effort for her shaky, dizzy head. The pony who had crashed into her didn’t seem to have that problem.
“Aah! I’m so so sorry! Are you all right?” cried a filly. Her voice cracked on the last word, which only added to Fluttershy’s headache. “I didn’t mean to hurt you. I only meant to go really fast and really far, so everypony would think I was super-cool. I was planning to do this awesome flip, but it didn’t really work out. Hey, aren’t you supposed to be in our class right now? What’s your name again?”
Fluttershy opened her eyes and picked herself up. For a moment, all she saw was a rainbow. Then, as her brain grew less fuzzy, she realized that the rainbow was a mane, and the mane was attached to a blue filly, and the blue filly was Rainbow Dash. Fluttershy gasped and backed away, hiding behind her pale pink mane.
“Hey, are you all right? Did you hear me?” asked Rainbow Dash. Any moment now, Rainbow Dash was going to recognize her as the idiot who tripped. Rainbow Dash was going to remember, Oh, this is Klutzershy.
Recognition dawned on the cyan filly’s face. “Hey,” she said, “aren’t you—”
Before Rainbow Dash could finish her sentence, Fluttershy bolted away. She wasn’t sure where she was going, but she knew it had to be somewhere where she could be alone, somewhere where nopony would know who she was.
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Ahead of Fluttershy, fillies and foals giggled nervously and joked about how they were going to fall midway through their journey through the hoops. They could joke, because they knew that they wouldn’t really fall. Even if they did fall, it wouldn’t be a big deal—at least they would have flown for a little while.
Even though she had missed yesterday’s class, Mr. Cloudy was insisting that she had to fly through the obstacle course like everypony else. “Nothing short of a serious illness will stop you from doing this obstacle course,” he declared to the entire class. “I don’t want no faking, either. You came to this camp to learn how to fly, not to learn how to sit around on your rump.” When his students giggled, he had barked, “This is serious, my little ponies!” He glared at Fluttershy as if it was her fault.
Now, Fluttershy thought that she might throw up. Did that count as a serious illness? Maybe if she threw up enough, the teachers would get so disgusted that they would just send her home. It was a long shot, but it was possible. She tried to encourage the butterflies in her stomach to get worse, but she was shaking so hard that she could barely think straight. The line in front of her was getting shorter and shorter. She risked a peek behind her. Great, just great—Rainbow Dash was standing directly behind her, and Gilda was behind Rainbow Dash.
“Fluttershy!” said Mr. Cloudy impatiently. “It’s your turn. I’ve called your name twice already.” Fluttershy stood frozen, her eyes wide with dread. “Get your flank up here!” he snapped.
Humiliated, she unfroze and stumbled up, peering over the edge. She swallowed hard. The students were waiting there at the bottom, staring up at her. Her breaths came out unevenly. No. She was going to fly. But when she tried to move, she felt like she was frozen.
Fluttershy had sensed that Mr. Cloudy was getting irritated, but she never expected him to do what he did next: Push her off. She screamed and flailed her arms and legs around, but it was no use. And just when she thought that things couldn’t get any worse, her wings stopped working. Just . . . stopped, and glued themselves to her sides. She hovered in midair for a second before dropping like a stone onto the clouds.
Dust from the clouds surrounded her for a moment, shielding her view. When it cleared, there was silence as ponies gathered around her. Then she heard a few voices begin to chant.
“Fluttershy, Fluttershy, Fluttershy can hardly fly!” More and more pegasi began chanting, until it seemed like devils were screaming at her. For every hoof that was pointed at her, a spear drove into Fluttershy’s heart. She squeezed her eyes closed and clamped her hooves over her ears. She knew that she looked like a baby, but she didn’t care.
Fluttershy felt a hoof tugging at her. Surprised, her hooves dropped from her ears and her eyes opened. “Come on,” said a voice. She looked up and saw Rainbow Dash. “Come on,” repeated Rainbow Dash, urgency in her voice. Fluttershy stumbled up and allowed Rainbow Dash to lead her away from the voices. Rainbow Dash was much faster than Fluttershy, so the yellow filly was dragged most of the way. When they could no longer hear the voices, Rainbow Dash let go of Fluttershy’s hoof.
“Are you all right?” she asked Fluttershy, her rough voice filled with concern.
Fluttershy opened her mouth—and promptly burst into tears. Rainbow Dash looked startled. Apparently, she hadn’t counted on any crying. As Fluttershy wept violently, Rainbow Dash struggled to come up with something soothing to say.
“It’s okay,” she said uncomfortably. “They’re idiots. Don’t worry about them.” Fluttershy only cried harder. Rainbow sighed. “I am so sick of them picking on everypony.”
Fluttershy shook her head. “They don’t pick on everypony,” she choked.
“They do pick on other ponies,” said Rainbow Dash firmly before sighing. “They just pick on you the most.”
“Why?” asked Fluttershy. It was the question that had been nagging at her the most since she had arrived at this camp. Out of all the ponies, why her? She had to be at least a year older than Hoops and his followers.
Rainbow Dash shifted uncomfortably. “Well, you kinda—” They heard a pony’s voice in the distance. Fluttershy groaned miserably. It was Mr. Cloudy, shouting something about how this camp was not a joke and how they had to start taking life seriously.
Rainbow Dash winced. “He’s probably mad at me. I didn’t even take my turn before flying down. I just got really angry at everypony, and sometimes when I get angry, I just forget about everything around me and don’t think about what I’m doing.”
“Do you want to go?” asked Fluttershy. “He’ll probably be less angry if you come out now.”
“Nah, said Rainbow Dash. “I’d never leave a friend hanging. We can face him together.”
Fluttershy beamed and almost skipped towards Mr. Cloudy with Rainbow Dash. Though the chant of “Fluttershy, Fluttershy, Fluttershy can hardly fly” was still echoing in her mind, another word was echoing louder—a word that Rainbow Dash had just spoken.Friend.
