Unleash the Magic (Under Controlled Experimental Conditions)

by PonyAmorous

Rating: everyone
Tags: Comedy, Sunset Shimmer, Twilight Sparkle, Equestria Girls
Length: 987

SciTwi is a responsible scientist

Alternate ending to EQG: Friendship Games if SciTwi were a responsible scientist.

Published 2015-10-01 04:40:01 UTC
Last updated 2015-10-01 04:40:01 UTC

Proper Procedure

"I've seen what your device can do Twilight. Containing magical energy is fine, but have you considered releasing it?"

"What?" Twilight stared back at the woman, mouth agape, as if she had suddenly grown a second head. A head that had then suggested she jump into a shark tank wearing a suit made of raw meat. "But I don't even understand how it works!"

"But you'd like to," Principal Cinch continued as if her previous suggestion were perfectly sane, "and since our opponents have already used it to stay competitive, I see no reason why we shouldn't do the same. Unless of co-"

"No, REALLY!" Twilight interrupted. "I mean I have NO idea how it works. At all! I'm not sure what you're expecting me to do here. Even if suddenly unleashing all this unstable and completely unknown energy didn't simply result in a massive explosion vaporizing the school and everyone in it, the only thing I've actually seen it do is tear open rifts to another dimension. Aside from the fact that repeatedly tearing holes in the fabric of reality probably isn't a very good thing to do, I have no idea how you think this course of action would result in giving us even a marginal advantage in a game of capture the flag. Am I supposed to just...what? Spray it all over our team and hope it gives them flag finding super-powers?"

"But...well...don't you want to understand? Aren't you curious? Don't you need to know how it works?"

"Of course!"

Principal Cinch gave a satisfied nod. "Well then-"

"Which is why I'm so eager to get back to the lab and start designing a long list of carefully controlled experiments. The lab filled with advanced equipment I can use to collect stacks and stacks of data to a high degree of precision, as opposed to just releasing all this energy at once in an open field with no experimental constraints, and not so much as a pen and notepad to record observations with."

"Well-"

"And that's still ignoring the issue of safety and containment, which I feel really shouldn't be a trivial matter when it comes to something that is, again, ripping holes in the fabric of reality. Who knows what kind of radiation that might be giving off?" She held the amulet up in front of her and cast a wary eye at it. "In fact, I'm really starting to question my initial decision to wear this as a necklace. I'm probably gonna get some form of super breast cancer now, and then everyone will start measuring units of magical radiation in 'Sparkles'."

Twilight continued to stare at the amulet, trying to decide if it would be better to move it to her skirt pocket instead, adding the risk of sterility and/or ovarian cancer into the mix, or leave the potentially deadly device sitting directly over her heart. Principal Cinch massaged the bridge of her nose with her thumb and forefinger.

"Look, I'll make this blunt. Do it or your application to Everton gets rejected."

"Oh right, Everton. About that..." Twilight cleared her throat and pushed her ever slipping glasses back up her face. "Recent events have...put some things in perspective. Everton has a lovely program, but as I am currently holding what is sure to amount to several Nobel prizes in physics, I'm fairly confident that I can take my pick of technical universities willing to put me up, or just support my own studies with the flood of grant money."

Principal Cinch's normally cyan knuckles had begun to turn pale in her clenched fists. "But Crystal Prep has a Reputation to uphold!"

"Yes, and a decade from now, that reputation is going to be 'the place where Twilight Sparkle went to school for a while'. Have fun with your game, I've really got to go and get started on these experiments. There's just one more thing."

Twilight waved an arm in the air and shouted across the field to the other team.

"Hey! Hey you...uh...girl with the bacon hair whose name I never actually learned!"

"It's Sunset Shimmer!" Sunset called back. "What do you want?!"

"You've got the most experience with magic right?!"

"Yeah! I mean kinda! I haven't really worked out how it works in this world yet, but it was kind of my area of expertise back in Equestria!"

"I don't know what that is, but how would you like to come back to my lab and science the crap out of some magic for thirty six hours straight, pass out, do more science, and eventually split a couple Nobel prizes?"

"...HELL YES! Let me just grab my notes!" Sunset ran inside the building, returning a minute later carrying a binder under her arm and a heavily worn lab coat over her shoulder.

"Whoa whoa whoa!" Rainbow Dash jumped in front of her, waving her arms frantically. "We've got a game here! You can't just go running off now!"

"Well they're about to be a player down. You don't want to win by forfeit do you?"

"Well...no I guess not..."

"Well then to make the numbers equal again, I'll sit this one out and go unravel the fundamental mysteries of the multi-verse. Good luck with your game. Remember to umm...believe in yourself...uh...power of friendship....bye!"

Sunset took off at a sprint, joining up with Twilight Sparkle on the far side of the field. The two made their way to the bus stop where they took the next bus back into the city and prepared for a long night of experimentation.

...

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Also they banged.

Author's Note

Just a really short and really stupid one shot I suddenly got the urge to write. Writing it so it can get out of my mind and I can focus on finishing the next chapter of Heart of Loyalty. Posting it because why the hell not?