The Cold, Empty bottle of Sarsaparilla

by Desert pony with no name

Rating: everyone
Tags: Pinkie Pie, Tragedy, Dark, Alternate Universe, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic
Length: 8976

Pinkie Pie wakes up in a mental institution to find that here entire life in Equestria has all been a delusion, now she's cured of her "illness" but still has no idea who she is or what her real name even is. All she has now is a empty bottle of sarsaparilla, with a crumpled up birthday card inside, and an address..........

Published 2011-07-22 07:46:46 UTC
Last updated 2011-07-22 19:02:02 UTC

Chapter 1

The Cold, Empty bottle of Sarsaparilla

Pinkie Pie woke up, stretched, and finished off with a great, big, “Yaaaaaaaaaaaaaaawwn! What’s today gonna be like, I wonder,” she said as she hugged her pet alligator goodbye and bounced out the door. She was on her way to the usual place, Sugarcube Corner, for a fun filled day of baking and party planning. “After all,” she said to herself, “Isn’t it Twilight's birthday tomorrow? Or maybe Rainbow Dash - no no NO... it was Fluttershy, wasn’t it?” Pinkie Pie’s memory has been escaping her lately. She bounced along while trying to decide whose party she had planned in the first place when she spotted two strange figures in the distance.

They were both an odd tan color with little to no mane, and were wearing white coats. They were both standing on their hind legs like they were trying some weird trick; the one on the left was holding a clipboard with some strange deformity on his hoof. The one on the right wore thick horn-rimmed glasses.

“This,” he said looking at the figure to the left, “is patient #109.”

“Well, what’s her real name?” the other figure inquired.

“We found her with no identification. She goes by the name Pinkie Pie, but we don’t call her that as it may feed her delusions.”

“Delusions, doctor?”

“Yes. We’ve diagnosed her with a severe case of schizophrenia and an acute bipolar disorder. In short, she believes she is a pony”

“Fascinating,” the one on the left said as he scribbled down notes. “I’d really like to study this one more, if you’d be so kind doctor?”

“Well there might not be much to study soon; the boys upstairs approved her for a new experiential anti-psychosis drug called Serum #14-Q, which has shown great promise in permanently curing patients with even the most severe mental illness. She is scheduled for an injection tomorrow.”

Pinkie Pie just stared at the alien creatures; she was too far to hear what they muttered to each other, but she watched them anyway in curiosity. Something about the creatures seemed familiar, despite being so eldritch. She could have sworn she’s seen them before, but- WAIT! She thought to herself, they must be new here, right? So that means I have to throw them a party!

“HEY! Weird guys! YOO-HOO!” she shouted towards the figures. “You’re new to Ponyville, right? OhmygoshIllhavetoshowyoutoTwilightandRainbowDashandMrsCakeandeveryponyinPonyville!” shot through the mouth of the happy-tastic Pinkie Pie. The two figures exchanged curious looks.

“She does that all the time, you know... virtually every time I’ve gone to visit her over these past several years,” stated the figure on the right. With that, the two figures vanished from sight as a loud metallic *CLANK* sound followed.

“What was that all about?” Pinkie asked herself as she bounced along with her daily activities. “Oh well, I’ve got a party to plan.”

She spent the rest of her day planning a party for one of her friends (she still couldn’t remember which one though). Throughout the day, she scarcely gave a second thought about the two creatures. Weird stuff comes out of the Everfree forest all the time, right? But she still couldn’t escape the fact that they seemed so familiar.

The next day, Pinkie Pie was acting unusual. “Even for Pinkie Pie,” Spike noted. Pinkie lacked her usual pep and even walked as opposed to bouncing.

“Hey Pinkie, what’s up?” her friend Twilight asked as she walked up to her from behind.
“AAAAAUUUUUGGGGH!” Pinkie yelped as she jumped into the air.

“Hey, what’s wrong Pinkie? You seem... off,” said the lavender coloured unicorn with widened eyes.

“Oh Twilight, I’ve had a terrible nightmare last night! These two creatures kept poking me with needles!”

“... But you know it’s just a dream right?” Twilight retorted.

“But it wasn’t! I saw the same two creatures yesterday while I was walking to Sugarcube Corner!”

“Maybe you saw the two creatures and then had a nightmare about them? What did they look like anyway?” asked the ever-so logical Twilight. “Dragons? Diamond Dogs?”

“No, I mean it! THESECREATURESAREOUTTOGETMEANDIHAVENOIDEAWHY!” blabbered out the Pink pony, frustrated at Twilight’s skepticism. It wasn’t long until tears formed in her eyes as she began to sob. Twilight, who wasn’t taking her seriously, saw the torment in Pinkie’s eyes; it was enough to spark concern for her friend.

“Alright Pinkie, alright. Do you wanna walk over to Sugarcube corner and talk about it over a slice of cake?” Twilight asked, gently hugging Pinkie as she nodded timidly.

As the two walked towards Sugarcube Corner, Pinkie began to feel much better. “You know Twilight... I didn’t think you were going to believe me, but I’m really glad you decided to list-,” she stopped herself as she noticed Twilight wasn’t at her side anymore. “Hey! What’s the big idea?!” she exclaimed in disbelief. There was no response - only the blow of the empty wind. “Well then... I’ll just walk to Sugarcube Corner by myself!” she gave out a cute little “hmmph!” as she trotted along.

After a short walk by herself, she arrived at Sugarcube Corner just in time for lunch. “Hello Mrs.Cake! Can I get a slice of carrot cake?” asked the now hungry pony. But as she looked around, she noticed that the shop was empty. “Where is everypony?” asked the usually perky Pinkie in a timid tone. “This place is usually crowded this time of day!” she told herself as she trotted off in search of another soul.

Throughout her day, Pinkie found Ponyville to be a ghost town; she’d never seen the town so empty. It was unusual, surreal, and even downright terrifying to see not another pony all day. She wandered around Ponyville looking for someone until the sun had set, and then wandered home.

When she opened the door she half-expected (or half-hoped) to see everypony in Ponyville jump out and yell “SURPRISE!!!!” but was sadly disappointed to be greeted by only her blank faced alligator Gummy.

“Oh Gummy, at least you’re here. It seems there’s not anypony left in Ponyville...” she mumbled as her face sank into a gloomy, depressed expression before shooting back to its usual peachiness. “Well... maybe things will be better in the morning!”

Things weren’t better in the morning...

Chapter 2

The Cold, Empty Bottle of Sarsparilla
Part 2

Pinkie Pie woke up, stretched, and finished off with a great, big, “Yaaaaaaaaaaaaaaawwn! What’s today gonna be like, I wonder.”

Immediately after yawning, everything began to come back to her as she turned in her bed, trying to grab those last few precious moments of sleep. She began to remember that everypony in Ponyville mysteriously disappeared. Oh well at least I’m in my warm - actually, this bed feels a bit colder than usual, Pinkie thought to herself, and firmer... And where’s my alligator? WHERE’S GUMMY!?!

Opening her eyes, she quickly scanned the room around her: her happily-decorated home seemed to have been replaced with a cold, cubic, concrete room. Her fluffy, cozy bed was substituted with a cold springy cot with no sheets and a single blanket that seems to be made of burlap. She looked at her surroundings several times to make sure they were correct. “Hello? Is anypony there? Please!” she shrieked, desperately trying to make sense of the situation. Her eyes began to tear up. “I just wanna go home!”

Suddenly, the sound of footsteps from outside the large metal door at the other end of the room met with her ears. “I think this one’s awake finally! Do you mind if I check on her?” said a familiar voice. Pinkie perked up at the small trace of familiarity, hopeful to be liberated from whatever she was in. The metal door made a loud *CLANK* as the door unlocked and its slides opened. One of the two figures she’s been seeing in Ponyville a lot of late emerged from the door, smiling.

“Hello miss, you’re awake! How are you feeling? Better perhaps?” asked the figure as he began to write notes on his clipboard. All Pinkie Pie could do was hide under the blanket and give out a faint *whine*. “I’m sorry miss, I didn’t mean to scare you! My name’s Mr. Nathan - soon to be a doctor though!” he said. “And who might you be?”

“Um... umm...” Pinkie mumbled under her breath. She felt almost like Fluttershy at the moment, but she was somewhat glad her friends weren’t there to see her in her current condition.

“Mr. Nathan!” came another voice as the other familiar figure with horn-rimmed glasses appeared. “Why didn’t you tell me she was awake?” Nathan just fiddled with his clipboard until he looked up at the other figure.

“I’m sorry sir, she just woke up right now. And I was hoping to get in some notes on the effects of the-”

“That’s enough, Mr. Nathan,” he interrupted, “just remember: we’re doctors. The well-being of the patient comes first!”

Pinkie Pie was humming quietly to herself and thinking the words to a song to drum up some bravery:

I'd hide under my pillow,
From what I thought I saw.
But Granny Pie said that wasn't the way
To deal with fears at all.

She said: Pinkie, you gotta stand up tall,
Learn to face your fears.
You'll see that they can't hurt you,
Just laugh to make them disappear!

The song did little to calm her nerves, but it did get the doctors’ attention. “I’m sorry miss, what song was that? It’s beautiful!” Nathan commented in an encouraging tone.

“Yes, yes, miss, you must be a natural - amiright?” the horn-rimmed glasses doctor retorted to Nathan. “By the way miss, I’m Doctor Mathews, and what might your name be?”

The doctors’ friendly faces helped put Pinkie’s mind at ease. “My name’s Pinkie Pie!” she said, putting on a brave face. The doctors just looked at each other with concern.

“Uh, miss, what might your real name be?” asked Dr. Mathews. Pinkie looked at him in a bit of disbelief.

“That is my real name, you silly willy!” Pinkie answered. Mr. Nathan began scribbling something onto his clipboard.

“Um, miss - do you mind if I ask a few questions?” Dr. Mathews asked, somewhat nervously.

“Okey dokey lokey!” she replied; her fear completely gone from her voice. Dr. Mathews cleared his throat.

“First off, where are you from?” he asked with a straight expression on his face. Pinkie thought for a moment, surprised at the obvious question.

“Well, I’m from Ponyville, of course!” Pinkie replied. Dr. Mathews’ facial expression remained straight.

“Uh hum, and where is Ponyville?”

“Well, I’m not too sure of the location on a map. My friend Twilight Sparkle could point it out! All I know is that it’s in Equestria!” Dr. Mathews’ raised an eyebrow.

“Who is this ‘Twilight Sparkle’? What does she look like?”

“Oh! She’s the smartest unicorn in all of Equestria, except maybe Princess Celestia.” Pinkie replied, still oblivious to the whole situation.

“And who is Princess Celestia?”

“Well duuuuuuuuugh! She’s the ruler of Equestria, of course!”

“Where is this, Equestria?”

“You don’t even know where Equestria is? Boy do I feel sorry for you!” she said as she giggled.

“Alright, one last question miss. Without the use of a mirror, can you describe your physical characteristics?” he asked, still retaining his neutral expression.

“Fish-full Mayor-picnics? Fizzy-cal Care-tear-tricks? UUMMMM...”

“What you look like! Tell us what you look like!” he stammered with a tone of frustration.

“Oh, well then! My coat is pink, my hair is also pink and curly, like cotton candy! And on my flank are three balloons. See?” She explained as she tried to look at her flank. But couldn’t see her cutie mark - or her tail for that matter. “HEY! Where’s my tail?” she shouted as she began to panic.

“HEYIDON’TKNOWWHATITISTHAT’SGOINGONBUTSOMEPONYBETTERTELLME!” she screamed at the top of her lungs, flailing her arms about wildly.

“NURSE! I need a tranq here!” Doctor Mathews shouted as he and Nathan held Pinkie Pie down. She kicked and shouted as the nurse came in with another needle filled with a clear liquid.

“NOTTHENEEDLE!” was the last thing she shouted before feeling a prick in her flank, and falling asleep.

Chapter 3

The Cold, Empty bottle of Sarsaparilla
Part Three

The two doctors sat in the break room sipping at their cups of coffee, Dr.Mathews seems quiet. At this point of the day he and Nathan are usually chatting it up about their work with the patients; things like whose acting better, who’s getting worse. Exchanging theories about their perspective fields, but today there’s not a sound in the room, even the nurses seem to pick up on this and have been keeping conversation to a minimum.

Dr.Mathews pours another cup of coffee, taking slow sips as not to burn his lips, he lets out a great big *sigh* which penetrates through the silence. Nathan looks at his notes on patient #109’s file; he works up the bravery to finally bring up the elephant in the room. “So what do you think went wrong?”

A surprised Dr.Mathews looks up at him; “I think the transition between complete fantastic other-worldly delusions, and a cold hard reality can be painful for some-” he shakes his head “all people. I mean think about it! She lived in this world....this......Equestria for almost ten years now! She’s had many friends, imaginary friends, yes! but sometimes that’s all we have when the world turns its back on you, like a lonely child. Humans have a flight-or-flight response for physical danger, why not emotional danger? Maybe at the most troubling of times maybe people flee into the sweet bliss of denial, taking them where no one can hurt them. That is why I fear treating them my friend, I desire to make people happy and sometimes the right type of crazy is what happiness really is.”

After that the silence set in again as the intern contemplated on his well thought out response “So why do we do it?”
Taking another sip of coffee Dr.Mathews looks at his apprentice inquisitively “hmmmmm?”
“I mean why do we treat them, Pinkie- I mean the girl was perfectly happy in her fantasy, then why do we treat her?”

“The social consensus believes it is better for them, that reality, despite its flaws is better than a lie. But who’s to ague what is our reality? If you woke up tomorrow, in a twisted, horrifying world with alien beings telling you everything you know is a lie, what would you think?”

“I’d want to get back to this world, I suppose.” Nathan answered. “Right! Despite all that it is our duty, whether we choose to do it or not, to cure this girl; I just hope she’s strong willed enough to handle things when we go talk to her again.”

Pinkie Pie woke up in the middle of Sugarcube Corner, she looked around; everything seemed queer and distorted, the bright colors replaced with dreary faded colors, like that of an abandoned carnival. An empty shell of what fun there used to be in times long since past. There was another thing, everything looked.........off. Pinkie Pie didn’t even know how to describe it, “three-dimensional” and “textured” would be the words she’d use, had they been in her vocabulary. Every crack and crevice seemed meticulously placed, different objects had a different set of these bumps and jags, Some things, like the slice of cake sitting on the table, was full of tiny bubbles of air trapped in the cake. While other things, like tiles seemed to remain smooth, like in the world she remembered.

The properties of the room itself seemed abnormal too; the room seemed more “spacey” things seemed to be placed in an odd fashion. The cake sat on a table which was in the middle of the room. It seemed easier to tell how far away it was other than the size of the table. She walked up to it, and looked at the cake; taking in all the tiny bubbles trapped inside. Pinkie grabbed the plate and rotated it, making these tiny shadows move relative to the light, at one angle it looked different than it did at other angles.

Pinkie continued looking about the room, exploring this new “feel” to everything when an all too familiar *ding* as the shop door opened.

It was Twilight; she looked the same despite all the surroundings, Pinkie Pie’s face lit up. “OhmygoshTwilightI’msogaldtoseeyouIcouldscream!” She jumped in the air and gave her a massive hug “What are you doing here?” Pinkie asked.

Twilight just looked at Pinkie, with a cold blank expression on her face “Pinkie, I think I’ve figured all this out”

“Oh you do? Thank Celestia! Cause I’ve got no clue as to what’s going on!”

“Pinkie, I think this is all a hallucination.” she stated bluntly; Pinkie stared at her blankly. Twilight rolled her eyes “It means that this room, myself, and every pony in Equestria are all a fabrication of your mind!”

Pinkie just looked at her with a confused look “That’s odd, that’s the same thing those creatures were trying to tell me!” her eyes widened in realization. She took a couple steps back as her eyes began to tear up “NO! That isn’t true!”

“Pinkie, think about it! Danmit! This isn’t real! Those two creatures, they’re called humans, they’re trying to help you! I know you’ve been seeing them all your life! You just have been trying to deny everything!”

“NO! I’ve never seen them before until the other day!” Twilight Sparkle shook her head “No Pinkie, I know that you know that isn’t true”

“And how do you know that?” Pinkie enquired.
Twilight just looked at her for a moment “I’m part of your subconscious” before Pinkie even had a chance to ask what does “Sub-launch-ness” means she stopped her “I means, that I’m part of your mind, I made this room to show you what the real world is like, I brought you here to tell you that your life in Ponyville is over”

Pinkie Pie began bawling “WHHHHHHHHYY!”

Twilight went to comfort her friend “I’m sorry, but this is the way it has to be.” Pinkie Pie’s face was sopping wet with tears

“But what about all my friends? You, Apple Jack, Rainbow Dash, Rarity, Spike, Fluttershy?”

“We’re all here, we’re part of you! You’ll never leave our sight, and we’ll never leave you!” She gave Pinkie Pie the biggest hug she’d ever received “It’s time to say goodbye, Pinkie Pie”

Goodbye......................

Chapter 4

The Cold, Empty bottle of Sarsaparilla
Part.4

Pinkie Pie was finally wide awake, having finally accepted her life in Equestria s a lie her eyes began to moisten, but she did not cry. She was past crying, she’s done more than her fair share of suffering, and it’s time to move on. She began to look around the room, taking in all the implications of the strange new world, the odd details of this world. She sat in silence for several minutes without moving a muscle; but then finally decided to get up and walk about the tiny room. She looked down at the blanket; it had a red stripe pattern that she kind of liked; it reminded her of a candy cane. The room was small but had the necessities, like a toilet; a cold chrome chemical toilet, but it did its job. At the other end of the room was a small window, about the size of her head, no perhaps a bit smaller. She walked up to it; the window was barred despite being so small, but she could still see outside of it. There wasn’t much to look at, an empty field of half-dead grass, overgrown with weeds, but somehow she liked it. All the plants seemed to have infinitely finer detail than back “home”, even the most ugly of the plants contained a complexity she’s never seen before.

On the other side of the room was a large metal door, she was all too familiar with it though, so gave it little attention until she heard a loud *CLANK* which made her jump. She looked at the door to see a small metal slit was open and a curious pair of eyes was looking in, it was Nathan “Oh hello miss you’re awake......again, ummmmmmm.......we were hoping to talk to you if you’re feeling better, you know after last time.”

Pinkie Pie couldn’t help but giggle slightly “Yeah, I’m better I promise I won’t fly off the handle like that again!”

Nathans eyes brightened a little “Okay then! I’ll have to get Dr.Mathews, I’ll be right back!” he said as he closed the slit with another *CLANK* she could hear the sound of him trotting........walking down the hall.

As he was leaving she couldn’t help but notice her voice, it was exactly the same as it was in Equestria “hello?” she said to test it out. Yeah it was the same, oddly enough she thought, wonder what else I got right?

Just then she could hear two sets of footsteps walking towards her, then the familiar metal *CLANK* again. The slit slid open and now two sets of eyes were looking at her “Hello there!” Dr.Mathews said with a careful cheer in his voice “Are you feeling better? Are you ready to talk?”

Pinkie just smiled “Yeah I’m okay! And I’m not going to freak out! Cross my heart, hope to die, stick a cupcake in my eye!”

Nathan couldn’t help but snicker at her child-like antics. Dr.Mathews elbowed him, “Alright then, coming in!” he said as the slit closed with a *CLANK* and the door opened with another *CLANK* the door began to slide open and the two figures walked in cautiously, Pinkie couldn’t help but notice there was a nurse behind them with another sleepyneedle, should the need arise. “So is everything better?” asked Dr.Mathews, “Have you come to terms with your, umm.......lack of tail?”

Pinkie tried to hold back a mischievous smile “MY WHAT?!?” she screamed, and with that the two doctors took a step back and the nurse got ready to grab hold of her...............until the sound of laughter was heard “GOTCH YA!!!” she laughed out loud, rolling on the mattress, with tears dripping down her face, her arms holding her sides.

The two doctors stood there flabbergasted, Nathan trying to hold back laughter. The nurse seemed less than amused as she stood there with a stern glare at Pinkie, “May I be dismissed, doctor?” Dr.Mathews stood there grinning “Yes nurse Ratched, you may leave.” and with that the nurse marched out with a disgruntled look on her face.

“So” Nathan looked at Pinkie “you seem to be feeling better, miss. Does this mean you’ve come to accept things?”

Pinkie nodded “MMMMHHHHMMMMMMM!!! I’ve come to accept that my life in Equestria was all in my head! I am going to miss it just a lot though.”

Nathan began writing his notes again “Don’t worry I’m sure there’s lots of things to appreciate about reality, just give it time.”

“Can I ask for a favor please?” she requested.

Dr.Mathews raised an eyebrow “Yes, miss?”

She looked down at her new form “Can I look at myself in a mirror? I’ve never gotten a chance to see my real face”

The two doctors looked at each other, it was an innocent enough request; they could easily bring her a little piece of foil so as not to create a danger by giving a patient glass or metal, but they thought about last time, and were concerned the shock would be too much for her to bear. After all she seems to have accepted reality a little too fast and they would hate to see her progress take another step back.

“Ummmmm.....we’re not too sure if that’s a good idea at the moment, perhaps in a few hours, maybe. You understand right?” She nodded, she understood the reason why but was a little disappointed nonetheless. With that the doctors bid farewell to Pinkie, and closed the door with another *CLANK*

She was alone again and now had to face a new dilemma, boredom. This was a problem she scarcely had to deal with in Ponyville, with all my friends and parties, and-

She stopped that train of thought, this is her life now, and she’d have to stop comparing the real world to Ponyville. She stared at the wall for awhile, until she figured she’d get up and look out the window. Pinkie Pie enjoyed the empty field that lay just beyond her confines; the peaceful winds blew through every half-dead blade of grass. She found the utmost beauty in all of this; she wished she could go run in that field, to feel the grass as she rolled around in it.

She spent the next few hours day dreaming about herself playing in that field, until a familiar sound startled her. I’m never gonna get used to that clanking sound. This time the metal slit opened and a small piece of foil slipped thorough, followed by an immediate closing of the slit. Pinkie gasped at the little piece of foil, she tried to yell “thank you” out the door but the footsteps were too far away for the person to hear.

She picked up the little piece of foil and looked at herself with the utmost excitement. Her hair was the first thing she focused on; she expected her well known pink, cotton candy hair. Where in reality it was a dark red and strait; it flowed like water down to her shoulders. She looked at her face, it was pale; she supposed she hadn’t much sunlight over the years. Besides that she thought her new face was cute, beautiful even. She smiled at herself, her smile emanated joy.

She slipped the foil under her bed; she wasn’t sure who it was that gave her the foil, but their anonymity suggested it was done in secret, so she decided to take no chances. She went back to her day dream, as she hummed a little tune to herself as she did so; after a length of time, she couldn’t tell really, she entered a deep sleep.

Chapter 5

The Cold, Empty bottle of Sarsaparilla
Part.5

Pinkie Pie woke up, stretched and let out a great big *yaaaaaaaaaaaaawwwwwmnn* as she did so. She turned to look at the faint little light reaching her from her tiny little window. She sat up and stared at the wall for a few minutes when she heard the all-too-familiar clanking sound as the door opened. This time it was just Nathan who stepped in “Hungry?”

Pinkie rubbed her stomach, which gave out a powerful *groooooooowwl*, Nathan just smiled “I guess that means yes!” he laughed. He strolled in a strange looking chair with two big wheels on the sides “Sorry miss, protocol states that I must transport you around in this.” She sat down in the strange looking device, it seemed comfortable enough; she did feel silly, almost as if she was just a toddler being pushed in a stroller. In a way she was a toddler; toddlers couldn’t walk by themselves or they might “get lost” or “run away,” pretty similar scenario, the more she thought about it, but she didn’t want to think about it anymore.

She saw for the first time what it was like outside her little room. She was rolling through a plainly decorated hallway. With shiny black and white tiles, plain grey walls, all the windows were barred; a buzzing of incandescent lights could be heard above her. Despite all this she felt safe, the doctors (and most of the nurses) smiled warmly at her as she passed them. She momentarily passed through the lobby. She didn’t notice anything else about the room except a single pot of fresh flowers standing on a table in the far right of the room. It was the most beautiful thing she’s seen in this world, the intricate detail, much like the grass growing outside her window, along with the bright colors put her in a state of awe. She carried a big grin all the way to the lunch room.

She was wheeled to a table, where she sat next to a couple of other patients. She waited as a nurse brought her a plastic tray of odd looking food. On her tray was some yellow, fluffy material that she supposed were scrambled eggs. Next to the eggs was a pile of shredded and salted potatoes, below two strips of some brown looking stuff called “bacon.” She grabbed her plastic spoon they gave her and began to play with the eggs. She pushed them around the tray for a minute or so before taking a bite. They tasted pretty good, she washed down the mouthful of food with a sip of so-called “orange juice,” I don’t know what sorta magic they use to make this water the same color as OJ, but if they think this is real OJ, they must be the ones who are crazy!

She smirked at that thought as she took a nibble of the strange “bacon” strips. Oh my gosh this is delicious!!!! She shoved the entire strip in her mouth and began salivating furiously. I have no idea what this bacon stuff is, but it is awesome!

She began munching at the second strip when one of the other patients sitting across from her looked up at her; “So I hear you talk now, eh?” Pinkie Pie looked up at him; he wore a jumpsuit very similar to hers, and had a scruffy-looking hair cut “Name’s Ricky, I’ve been told you’ve been pulled out of your little pony world you’re always yammering about.” Pinkie Pie’s face sunk when she realized everyone could hear her when she was in Equestria.

Ricky could see the look of shame on her face “I’m sorry maim, didn’t mean to embarrass you! It’s just the other mates at this table don’t talk all too much.” He pointed at a mopey-looking man sitting next to him.

“Oh whatever, like you have anything interesting to even talk about, at least the things she says were interesting, but now she’s normal again. Doomed to be boring and dull like the rest of us” he whined.

Pinkie Pie, realized that these people were her “table-mates” so to speak; she must have been sitting by them for awhile now, she figured it would be best to be friendly to them “Hi! My name’s Pinkie Pie and you are?” she looked at the depressed-looking gentleman.

“Oh names are meaningless, just a label really. We go around saying it till we die, then it’s written on our graves so the world knows who it is they’re pissing on after were gone.”

Ricky rolled his eyes “See what I mean about him not being good for conversation? He just whines all the time.”

The mopey-man just looked at him “That wasn’t whining, thiiiiiiis is whining.”At that he just began a series of complains in an irritating tone.
Pinkie Pie snickered, as she tried to hold back a laugh, but the effort was in vain, as she burst out in an explosion of laughter. “What the heck is so funny?” Ricky asked in a slightly irritated tone.

Pinkie tried to hold back her laughter long enough to explain “It’s just” she snickered “I had a friend who sounded just like that! She even once said those exact words!” She was trying to hold her sides as she almost fell off the table, tears were rolling down her face as she began mentally comparing the annoying-whiney-man to her friend Rarity.

“Well I’m so glad I can amuse you!” he whined again “In case you really did want to know my name it’s Marvin, like you even care.”

Ricky rolled his eyes as he tried to change the subject “So! I know you’ve been known in your little fantasy world as Pinkie Pie, but what’s your real name?”

Pinkie Pie was getting tired of being asked this question, why is the name Pinkie Pie so unbelievable that everyone assumes that it’s wrong? It’s just my name dammit! “You know, I don’t know of any other name besides Pinkie Pie, so just call me that” she said in an irritated tone as she took another bite of her potatoes.

“Alright, alright! Pinkie it is then, sheesh! I just figured that sense you’re finally out of crazyville, or whatever world it is you thought you were living in, you’d have a real name.”

Pinkie didn’t respond, she just looked at her potatoes and tried to ignore his rude comments.

“You know” Marvin charmed in “You are in this mental hospital too, so going around calling everybody crazy just makes you look like an even bigger jerk!”

Needless to say Pinkie wasn’t enjoying her breakfast conversation, so when she saw Nathan she was thrilled. “You ready to go miss?” “Yes, please, yes” she said with enthusiasm; as she was being wheeled off she could hear Ricky saying “Well see you tomorrow, beautiful.” She cringed as she heard that; I sincerely hope that the people in this world aren’t all like that guy!

She was finally back in her little room, by herself; after a few hours it almost made her feel like wanting to talk to Ricky, almost. Marvin seemed nice enough, albeit a little annoying, but Ricky just seemed like a jerk; other than that he seemed normal, she wasn’t entirely sure what sorta mental ailment he suffered from, other than being a complete asshole. Can they put you away for being an asshole? I mean that isn’t really a mental thing, no? She put that thought to rest; there was no point at all in thinking about it.

Later on that evening she sat staring at the ceiling, in a state pure boredom; she was half-tempted to daydream about Ponyville for awhile, but decided against it. It would dampen, if not backtrack some of the progress I’m making here. But then again, do I really want to make progress here? I mean this world seems much less friendly here that back “home.”Why can’t I just go back? She shook her head, no I can’t go back! It doesn’t matter if things seemed better in Ponyville it’s not real! But what is real? And for that matter, why should I care? I mean, if I’m happier livings in some crazy delusion, then why not stay?

Her thoughts chased themselves in this manner for some few hours, never reaching a conclusion. She felt stupid for her indecisiveness; she felt so uncertain about things, she didn’t know what to do. She began to tear up, what do I do? Why is this happening to me!? I’ve been taken away from the rolling green hills of Ponyville, and pushed into this little stone dungeon, with no friends. She began sobbing, she buried her face into her pillow, lemmie go back! I just wanna go back! I wish I’d just wake up and this was all just a dream!

Her train of thought was interrupted by a loud *CLANK* sound, the door slid open and Nathan stood there, she tried to hide her weeping face in her pillow, but it was no use. The doctor-to-be could clearly see she was upset, so he sat down beside her and started rubbing her back. He didn’t say a word until Pinkie broke the silence “What do you want from me?” she asked with tears rolling down her face.

Nathan just sat there for a moment “We just want to help miss.”

She screamed at him “Don’t call me miss! My name is Pinkie! PINKIE PIE!!!” her scream echoed across the hallway.

He didn’t for a moment flinch, he didn’t even seemed the least bit afraid; here’s this mental patient, ripped out of her world, prone to panic attacks; a huge threat in his experience as an intern over the past few months. All his common sense was screaming, Get outta here, you moron! She’s crazy!

Pinkie now sat upright, tears on her cheeks, and a look of pure rage on her face. Two dagger eyes pointed strait in his direction, with a look of fire in her soul. “So!?! Say something!!!” she screamed again.
Nurse Ratched ran to the room with another sleepyneedle in hand, with a look that said “Oh boy! Here we go again!” written across her face.

Nathan motioned her away “That won’t be necessary, nurse.” he said calmly and coolly.

“Sir, with all due respect, are you fucking kidding me? I could hear her scream from the nurses’ lounge!”

“That is enough, Miss Ratched! You are dismissed!” he raised his voice. In all this time Pinkie buried her face back in her pillow as she screamed into it.

Now it was Nurse Ratched’s turn to carry a look of pure rage “FINE! Let that psycho-bitch trash you, but don’t blame me!” she stomped away; making a bigger scene than Pinkies screaming did in the first place.

Pinkie Pie was even more angry at herself for triggering an incident like this, she began clobbering the back of her head with her fists. Nathan grabbed both her arms and held them firmly “Stop that! That isn’t getting you anywhere!” he yelled. She stopped hitting herself, but continued to scream into her pillow with all her might. Nathan patiently waited for her to stop screaming, which took about five minutes. In that time of course, her screaming managed to attract more concerned doctors and nurses, but Nathan sent them all away.

When she finally did stop screaming Nathan prepped her upright, pulling her face out of her pillow, and hugged her “Feel better?” he asked. Pinkie’s throat burned like never before, but she managed to say in a quiet raspy voice “No, I’m not feeling any better.”

Nathan hugged her again “That’s okay Pinkie Pie, this is a slow healing, you’ll be okay.” Pinkie noticed that he finally called her by name.

“Aren’t you not allowed to call me that?” she asked.

“Doctor Mathews says I can’t enforce your delusions, but you Pinkie, have none.”

She raised an eyebrow at him “Hmmmm?”

Nathan chuckled, “If you were delusional, I highly doubt you’d of been screaming and weeping like that! No Pinkie, you are fully aware of the situation, painfully so, as a matter-of-fact; an emotional outburst like that is to be expected from you. And it’s best to not suppress it with sedatives, which is why I sent Nurse-Needle-Happy away.”

“But, weren’t you afraid I’d act out irrationally or violently?”

“Irrationally, yes. Violently, no. You’re not that type Pinkie; you don’t like to hurt others, you like to spread joy. You drive to make others smile. So I wasn’t afraid at all, I knew you were hurt, and restraining you and putting you to sleep would have made things worse.”

Pinkie Pie smiled, it was the tiniest of smiles, but the first genuine smile in ages. She gave Nathan a hug and whispered in his ear a soft “thank you.”

Nathan patted her back and smiled “Now for the real reason I came here! Tonight is movie night, and if we hurry we might catch the rest of it, are you feeling up to it Pinkie?” She nodded, despite not knowing what a movie was, but assumed it was some kind of performance.

Nathan wheeled her down the hall, which was lit up in the same incandescent lights from earlier; she passed the same flower pot in the lounge which gave her a much needed boost.

The “movie” was some kind of strange-looking device which projected a beam of light onto a screen, and the screen displayed a kind of “moving picture” complete with voices and music. She had missed the first twenty minutes or so, but Nathan told her the movie was called “The Wizard of Oz.” She was all too familiar with wizards, and figured the movie would be fun to watch.

She laughed at the singing munchkins, and loved the Good Witch of the North, whom reminded her of Princess Celestia. She liked how scary they made the Wicked Witch look, but was kind of annoyed cause every time she appeared on screen, someone a few rows back would scream “Oh god! She gonna get me!” She was almost tempted to shout at him “Calm down! It’s not real” but decided that it would sound silly coming out of her.

Her favorite part was when they went to meet the wizard, himself. His phony magic tricks couldn’t help but remind her of “The Great and Powerful Trixie” and chuckled to herself, as she imagined someone saying “Nopony can see the Great and Powerful Trixie! Not no way, not no how!”

Most of all she loved the songs in the movie, the feeling of magic and whimsy they carried made her feel nostalgic. She sang as she was being wheeled all the way back to her room, and then some.

She sat in her cozy little room and sang to herself “We’re off to see the wizard! The wonderful wizard of Oz! Because, because, becaaaaaaaaaaaause!” she jumped she heard a loud *BANG BANG BANG* on her door; the suddenness of the noise frightened her.

“Hello? I’m sorry for singing so loudly, I’ll stop I guess” there was no response, “hello?” *BANG BANG BANG* she jumped again “I said I was sorry!” *BANG BANG BANG*

After that she stopped saying anything, she just sat there in the cold silence, again, and went to sleep.

Chapter 6

The Cold, Empty bottle of Sarsaparilla
Part.6

*Ding!* went the coffee maker, Nathan grabbed the pot and looked at the clock on the machine, 5:57AM it read. This was usually the time of day he would use to get some paperwork done, before all the patients woke up. It was a nice, simple morning ritual; the kind that you got used to after months of repetition. He walked over to his mailbox in the main lobby, as he walked to the main desk he looked at a pot of flowers sitting there, they needed watering, but that simply wasn’t his job. So he passed it without second thought.

He looked at the stack of paper in his mail slot, mostly papers that needed to be filed, stamped, and refilled again; whatever kept the red-tapes happy. However, he noticed an urgent message in his mail today; it was in a bright red envelope that screamed “we mean business!”

He opened it, not too sure of what to expect:

From the desk of Dr. Krusen,
I request a moment of your time Nathan regarding yesterdays “incident” about patient #109 a.k.a “Pinkie Pie.” I urgently need to speak with you regarding the manor of her behavior and any future treatment of such incidents. Meet me at 6:05 PM today, on the second floor in office #12.

Nathan was puzzled, he’d never been called upstairs before, and he had doubts that they ever summoned someone regarding a patient before. It’s not like this kind of thing isn’t commonplace, it happens often enough.

Despite his confusion, he walked to the rarely used staircase; some nurses gave him odd looks as he headed towards the stairs. The room that housed the staircase was frigid this time of day, and even carried a bit of a draft.

Nathan opened the door to the second level of the hospital; the hallway was quiet, but held some people, who looked at him peculiarly. He walked down the hall, until he spotted office #12, a small gold plaque rested on the door front.
Doctor Wilkinson J. Krusen
PhD. in the Medical and Physiological Sciences
Head Researcher

Nathan wondered why this guy would bother himself with details of a patient, does it have something to do with the drug trial for Serum 14-Q? He was unsure what to think at the moment, it seemed the only logical theory.

He cracked open the door to find a short, bald man sitting at his desk with a bottle of brandy. His office was dusty and unkempt, and the odor of brandy and cigars hung think. He looked at Nathan with eyes of anger, and a slight hint of fear. “Mr.Nathan, have a seat please.” he asked in an unsettling tone.

Nathan did as he was asked; he held out his hand to shake with the doctor, but Dr.Krusen just stared at him, coldly.

“Nathan, lets skip all the unpleasantries and get right down to the point, shall we?” he said in a calm cool manner “Now this patient of yours #109, who likes to be called Pinkie Pie.” he said with a tone of frustration, “I understand that she had a bit of a hiccup in her recovery, am I right?”

Nathan’s words were stuck in his throat “Ummm......yes sir she did, but she was just a bit upset, and I didn’t-”

“And when she was upset, did you get anyone to sedate her?”

“Well, ummmm, Nurse Ratched came with a sedative, but I sent her away cause-”

Dr. Krusen slammed his fist on the table, “Just what the fuck were you thinking!?! Huh?”

Nathan jumped out of his seat a little, “I didn’t think it would be a real problem, but I mean, umm-”
“Do you have any idea how dangerous that individual is, DO YOU?”

“But, there was nothing in her file that said she was any sort of threat.” he began to trip over his own words.

“I don’t give two shits, what was in her file! That girl is a serious threat to me, you and everyone in this hospital!” he paused to catch his breath “I didn’t mean to get worked up like that, Christ” he poured himself another glass of brandy. He tilted his head back and downed the entire glass in one gulp “Now you listen here, and you listen good! If that girl starts to flip out like that again, hell if she so much as looks at you funny, you better fucking tranq her so fast that her head will spin, do you understand me?!”

Nathan was stunned, but managed to speak in a soft, timid voice “Ummmm.......sir, I don’t really think that’s nessiss-”

“I said, do you fucking understand me?! It’s a simple fucking question, yes or no?!”

All of Nathan’s bravery was sapped; he couldn’t even muster up a response, so he just nodded. Dr. Krusen sat back down in his swivel chair, “I’m glad we have an understanding, I’m sending a notice out to all the nurses, now get the hell out of here!”

Nathan scurried to the door, with his tail between his legs; he ran down stairs, without giving any of his co-workers a passing glance. He was back in the break room where his morning started.

Dr.Mathews could see the fear in his face, “Jeez man, what the heck happened to you?”

Dr.Krusen sat alone again in his empty room, he poured himself another glass of brandy and put the bottle away. He took a sip of the glass and set it down “I just pray that her amnesia sticks, so help me god” he said as he took another drink.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Pinkie awoke in her usual manner, a stretch followed by another big *yaaaaaawwwnnn* to wake her up. She heard the *CLANK* sound as the door opened, her face brightened, as she expected to see Nathan, but was disappointed to see Dr.Mathews. “Hello there Pinkie!” he said in a cheery voice.

“Hi Dr.Mathews! Where’s Nathan?”

“Well, he’s busy at the moment, so today I’ll be wheeling you to breakfast, ‘kay?”

Pinkie smiled and nodded as she got in the chair, she was eager to see the flowers in the lobby again; but her eagerness turned to disappointment, as she saw the once vibrant and lively flowers wilting away. Did anyone water them? She thought to herself as she passed through the lobby.

She was wheeled into the cafeteria, and set at her regular table. She saw Marvin look up at her and nod slightly at her presence. Ricky looked up at her from his tray of food and smiled “Well hey there, beautiful.” Pinkie did all she could to ignore him, refusing to even acknowledge his comment at all.

She looked down at her own tray of food; today’s meal consisted of blueberry pancakes, and eggs. The so-called “blueberries” tasted like little clumps of rock. The eggs were a tad too runny as well, but she ate them all the same.

“So you’re ignoring me today, I take it? That’s fine doll, your silence says no but your eyes say yes, more of this guy. Am I right, Marv?”

Marvin just rolled his eyes, “Will you please just shut up? For the love of god, you’re just annoying her, and me, not like you give a shit anyway.”

“Now that’s not true Marv, I’m not annoying you, am I doll?” he turned to Pinkie Pie, who just looked back, disgruntled.

“Why yes, as a matter of fact you are annoying me” she grumbled.

Ricky’s face seemed shocked for a moment, as if he actually was surprised to be rejected; but then his face reddened, not in shame but in anger. “Oh! So I’m annoying am I!? Well sweetheart, I say it’s you, who annoys me! How do you like that?”

Is this guy for real? Seriously? Her face never became more serious in her entire life in Equestria; her lips formed a perfectly straight line, her eyes shot sternly across the table toward the bumbling idiot. “Quite frankly, I don’t give a fuck!” she raised her voice slightly; just to make sure she got her point across.

Ricky was fuming now, his face turned a bright cherry red. He stood up, pushing his chair back, which fell down with a loud metal *THUNK* that made everyone look in their direction. One of his massive arms swiped his and her trays off the table, which sent the food flying away from the table. “You godamn bitch! Don’t you ever talk to me like that!”

Pinkie was scared beyond belief, she couldn’t even remember a time where she was more scared then right now. She tried to think back to other times she was so frightened, come on Pinkie, think! What is it you normally do when you’re frightened? Oh I got it!

“Ha, ha, ha!” she laughed out loud in Ricky’s face. Marvin’s eyes widened as if to say, did she seriously laugh in his face? She’s either the bravest person in the world, or the biggest idiot. Or both.

A single vein popped up on Ricky’s forehead; never before had Pinkie realized the brute’s true size. He towered over her looking down at her, partly drooling as he hyperventilated in rage. “BITCH I’LL SHOW YOU NOT TO LAUGH!” he screamed as he raised his arm high in the air.

For a moment Pinkie looked behind her, she saw two large male nurses, each with a sleepyneedle in hand. They started to dart towards them, but were held back by Nurse Ratched. She looked at them sternly, and they both took a step back. I guess I’m on my own with this one! Why did I have to laugh?! That was such a stupid idea!

His arm began to swing towards her; she closed her eyes and mentally braced herself for the pain she was all too sure she’d experience.

Any second now! She winced at the thought, ummmmmm.....did it happen yet? She refused to open her eyes in fear that he was just holding back for a moment, still nothing? She waited perhaps another five seconds or so before she finally worked up the courage to open her eyes.

What she saw was the face bright-red colored, fuming giant, with a look, not of rage but fear. His lip quivered as all his strength was being over powered, by what? Pinkie thought. She followed his arm to see a hand holding it mid-place, about half way to her face. Nathan! Oh my god I love you! It wasn’t Nathan’s arm however, she looked at it again, and it had a more feminine quality to it, Nurse Ratched?!? Nope, the arm was too youthful to be from her. Whose arm is this?

She followed the arm with her eyes to find that the arm was her own. What the hell!?!?!?!?! Her jaw hung open in disbelief. She couldn’t even believe it was possible that someone like her could hold back someone like him; not just hold back, but overpower. Pinkie looked back at his face to see his eyes; they beamed in fear and cowardice. As a fear reaction he struggled to get free, as he raised his other arm into the air. But then, without even realizing what happened, almost like a reflex; she flipped him on his back and onto the table, the two legs on the right half of the table gave out with a *SNAP* as Ricky rolled down the table side, Marvin’s food tray followed and landed on the back of his head with a splat. Then the other two legs decided enough was enough, and gave out as well with another loud *SNAP*

Pinkie Pie stood there in shock, her jaw hung open is awe. She felt a slight prick in her side, as she began to feel sleepy. She turned around to see Nathan with a look of sadness and shock on his face “I’m sorry about this Pinkie.” Was the last thing she heard, before falling into a deep sleep.