The Serpent and the Cheerleader

There are a scant few who truly appreciate the beauty of a Ponyville morning. Oh, there are many who are awake to see it, but few who actually want to. One such irritable early riser was a mare by the name of Twisted Ankle. Twisty to her friends.

Just as the clocks in the town ticked over to six-thirty the alarm clock sitting a scant few feet from a head of messy, straw-yellow mane let out a shrill ring. The response was automatic, a pink hand slamming down on the clock, ending its cry. Twisty yawned and pushed herself up off her pillow, blanket slipping off her quite attractive form.

Meanwhile, her alarm clock switched on its radio, allowing the familiar, raspy voice of the local disk jockey to help ease her into the morning.

"Good morning, Ponyville! It's six-thirty and unless my eyes deceive me it's gonna be another one of those warm Fall days. Enjoy 'em while they last, cause we've got one heck of a storm brewing up here later in the week."

The earth pony mare yawned again as she got out of bed, making a token effort to arrange it in a presentable manner. Shrugging to herself, she stumbled to her closet, stubbing her toe on her bed post as she past. The mare let out a string of hushed swears as she hopped to the closet.

The DJ was talking again. "Okay Ponyville, I'm gonna start your morning off with something that probably speaks to a lot of you."

Once there, she leaned against the doorjamb, trying to figure out what outfit to wear that day. She glanced back over her shoulder and through the window across the room. As the DJ had said, the previous day's clouds has moved on during the night, leaving the sky clear once again. She could risk shorts today.

The mare slipped off her night pants, briefly exposing her plump rump and the heart crossed with a baton on her flank. She pulled on her panties and her shorts, which stopped just above her knees, giving her legs a free range of movement. She traded her night shirt for a simple white bra and an equally simple white tee-shirt, ruffling her mane once she'd pulled her head through.

Finished, she kicked her night clothes into the closet and walked out of her room and down the hall to the bathroom. The house was quiet this time of day, her parents still sleeping. It took an earthquake to wake those two. Which meant that she always had the bathroom to herself in the morning, barring the occasional early rise.

Twisty sighed and she looked at her reflection, her mane in particular. It was often the worst part of her mornings. She could have just worn it in a ponytail all night, but she preferred to let it down when she slept. Today was her lucky day through, only a few knots had formed during the night. These were swiftly untangled and she tied her hair back, allowing the hairband to snap down.

Next she gave the mirror a bright, toothy smile, revealing her newly installed braces. She was swiftly growing to hate the things. They thankfully didn't hurt, but they just gave her such a... dorky look. She stopped smiling and pulled out her tooth brush, going through the motions of brushing before rinsing and spitting. She wiped her mouth with a small towel and gave the mirror another toothy smile. Maybe... maybe she could roll with this. It's just some shinny metal, not one's going to notice or care, right? It's not like she had a heated make out session planned later.

Satisfied with her appearance, Twisted returned to her room long enough to snatch up her small back pack before heading back down the hallway. Twisty picked up a peach on her way out the door, idly munching on it as she walked to school.

Ponyville was never the busiest of town, but at this time of day, it was practically dead, save the odd shop-keep getting an early start. It creeped Twisty out, the stillness, but she chalked that up to the general atmosphere Nightmare Night had. It was a scant few days until the holiday, and Ponyville was preparing to get its scare on.

Twisty took another bite of the peach, its sweet tang reminding her of the pie she had been eating the night before. She liked a good scare, probably a byproduct of the company she kept, but she was always a little jumpy.

She devoured the last of the peach as the school house came into view, spitting the pit into a passing bush. Before her time, the school house had been but a single room, where ponies of general ages were crammed together to learn. This necessitated a rotating schedule to see that most ponies got a proper education. But the school had undergone expansion and now boasted four rooms and two fields for outdoor activities.

Suck it, Shaleberg.

Twisty came to a stop at the old, white fence that once encircled the school, but now merely gated the short path to the original front door. She pulled her phone from its pouch on her backpack strap and flipped it open, intending to check the time.

"Twisty!" called a voice from behind her

She turned  in time to see a black-coated and silver-haired Thestral mare waving to her as she closed the distance between them.

"Morning, Scary," Twisty greeted her friend with a smile.

Scary Story, clad in her usual black windbreaker, pink shirt, black skirt and stockings, and near omnipresent sunglasses, stopped dead in her tracks, peering at Twisty's teeth.

"You got braces?"

"Yeah..."

Scary groaned and began flipping through the notebook she carried. "Damnit, now I have to change it."

"Change what?" Twisty said, trying to get a peek at the notebook.

"Nothing!" Scary abruptly shut the book.

Twisty sighed and rubbed her head. "Scary did you use me in one of your stories again?"

"No!" came the automatic reply, followed by a quick. "...Okay, maybe, but I changed your name."

"To what?"

"Here, look," Scary opened the notebook and flipped a few pages before turning it around for Twisty to see. "Right there at the top."

The page had been marked 'cast list' and on the very first line was written-

"Jamie Lee Curtis?" Twisty turned her gaze back to Scary. "The hell kind of name is Jamie Lee Curtis?"

Scary scoffed. "Heh, be glad. You don't die at the end."

"Lucky me," Twisty looked at the book again, noticing that next to her fake name Scary had written a quick summary of what she looked like and a few personality traits. Below her spot on the list was another name. "Okay Scary, if I'm Jamie, who's... Chesty McUseless?"

"Twsity!" came a sudden, sing-songy shout as someone jumped Twisty from behind.

"Guess," Scary deadpanned

"Ahh, Flare, the hell!" Twisty shouted, shoving her friend off of her back.

Double Moon Flare just giggled as she hopped back a step. Twisty always thought of herself as attractive, but whenever she stood next to Flare, she felt homely. She was an alicorn (because of course she was), with a magically pristine teal coat and a gracefully flowing pink mane with yellow highlights. Said mane was often styled to hang over one of her golden eyes. And, of course, she looked like she was sculpted by a horny sculptor. All of this was fitted rather snugly into pink sweater and hot pants.

"Sorry!" Flare said with a giggle. "I'm just so excited!"

"What about?" Scary asked in the same dead voice as before.

"Nightmare Night, silly," Flare said as she wrapped an arm around Twisty and pulled her close. "I though you would be excited about your favorite holiday being so close."

Scary's eye twitched for a movement before she just shrugged. "Eh, there aren't any good horror flicks this year. I'll probably just hang out with my mom and scare some foals."

Flare blew a raspberry, making Twisty wince due to their current closeness. "Come on, you can do better than that on Nightmare Night."

"You have a suggestion?"

Flare grinned. "I might."

Scary smirked. Twisty couldn't tell if it was encouraging or condescending.

Suddenly, Flare, who was still holding on to Twisty, turned to the other mare, nearly crushing their chests together.

"Oh, and before I forget, you still good for practice this afternoon?"

Twisty nodded. "Yeah, no problem, Flare."

"Wonderful,"

"Heya, guys," came the greeting of another friendly face, this one bobbing along with the beat coming through the headphones she wore.

"Laser Bright, just the mare I wanted to see!" Flare sang, letting go of Twisty to greet the crystal pony.

Twisty sighed and habitually brushed off the front of her shirt. Flare was sweet and well meaning, but the mare was handsy and tended to leave strands of her mane on ponies when she got too close. Twisty's gaze met Scary's and the Thestral scoffed again, head jerking to indicate Flare. Twisty just smiled and shrugged in return.

Meanwhile, Flare was pulling Laser Bright aside. The crystal pony might have been a rarity a decade or two ago, but they were swiftly becoming more common further south. Laser Bright herself was often a milky white color, although she would sometimes shift into a near transparent state of being, usually to enhance her light shows. Speaking of which:

"Alright, picture this," Flare was saying, smoothing out the black shirt the crystal mare wore. "A spooky, thumping party, just our circle of friends, at the old school outside of town."

Laser Bright pulled her headphones down around her neck and ran a hand through her short, spiky snow white mane.

"Huh, that place?" she bounced on her hooves. "Yeah, yeah, it had that big auditorium. Perfect place to set up."

"And maybe set up a few scares in the halls?" Flare playfully nudge the mare, who grinned in return, candy-red eyes sparkling with mischief.

"Sounds like loads of fun. Maybe I can trick Scary into giving me a good idea or two."

Flare giggled. "She is our resident expert. I'll take care of all the expenses, your fee included."

Laser Bright blushed. "Come on, Flare. I don't need to get paid for doing this."

"Ah, ah," Flare waved a dismissive hand. "I insist."

Laser Bright blushed brighter, coughing awkwardly. "Okay, but I'll do the legwork for you. I'm sure you'll be busy with practice." she glanced around before leaning forward and saying in a conspiratory tone, "By the way, you want me to nab something a little extra for the punch?"

Flare giggled. "And where in Equestria are you going to get that?"

"My mom'll probably just give it to me if I ask."

"Which one?"

Laser Bright laughed. "Which one do you think?"

Flare giggled again.

Twisty and Scary watched Flare and Laser Bright from a distance, wondering what the cheerleading captain and the armature disk jockey could be discussing.

Twisty then turned to Scary and said, "Chesty McUseless? Really?"

Scary put on a look of innocence. "What? It's not my fault she hit puberty when she was like eight."

Twisty groaned but decided to drop it. Flare would probably just find it funny anyway. "So, I have to ask; anyone else you decided to 'borrow'?"

Scary chuckled. "Actually-"

"Yo, Scary," called a new comer as he approached.

The Thestral turned and waved. "Hey, Xander, we were just talking about you."

Much like Laser Bright, Xander might have stuck out a few decades ago. Nowadays, a Zebra in Ponyville was just another everyday thing. Xander in particular was a fine specimen, standing tall and fit and currently wearing his usual brown slacks, white shirt and black tie.

He chuckled as he came to a stop beside the mares, adjusting his black framed glasses out of habit. "I hope you were gentle."

"Scary's never gentle," Twisty snickered. "She's using us in her story again."

Xander grinned broadly. "Sweet, can I see?"

Scary blushed faintly, but obligingly opened her notebook again, showing Xander the cast list page. "Right there near the bottom."

Xander leaned down and read a bit before snorting. "Stripes? Isn't that a bit racist?"

Scary shut the book and shrugged. "Coming up with names is hard."

"Oi! Mates!" called yet another new comer as they ran up.

This day was starting to feel like the first episode of a sitcom.

Twisty waved, "Good morning, Ember."

Ember Roundup dug in her hooves and kicked up some dust as she came to a stop in front of the others, just as Flare and Laser Bright were rejoining the group.

"Morning all," Ember panted and pulled off the Akubra she wore to fan her berry-blue face, her orange and purple striped mane looking frazzled and messy. "Alarm clock didn't go off, had to run over here." she explained, pushing her red-framed glasses back up her nose. "Got a surprise for ya."

"Let Scary go first," Xander snickered.

Scary sighed. "Can we wait until I finish it first?"

Ember blew out a breath. "You using us as murder fodder again?"

"No!" Scary said quickly, followed by a lower, "Okay maybe."

"Could you keep the accent down this time? I don't sound like I just hopped off the boat, ta." Ember said, briefly exaggerating her normally faint Brumbiland accent.

"Of course," Scary said a bit too loudly, hastily scribbling something in her notebook.

"You mentioned a surprise, darling?" Flare said, poking her head up from behind Scary.

"Right," Ember placed her hat back on her head. "It-"

"Aren't we missing someone?" Xander said, looking around.

"Are we?" Laser Bright asked, tilting her head.

Twisty rolled her eyes. "We're missing Token guys, jeez."

"Thanks for noticing," buzzed a disinterested voice as its owner approached.

While Twisty certainly had a reason to gripe about her name, Token had her beat. Even for a Changeling, Token wasn't exactly an inspiring name. He leaned on the fence next to the others, his nondescript dark clothing only a few shades different from his black-green exoskeleton.

You know, Equestria might be a melting pot of culture, but Ponyville is a fucking orgy.

"So, what's new?" Token asked. The group turned to Ember.

The earth pony cleared her throat. "Alright, the surprise it-"

She was cut off by the bell ringing loudly.

Ember rolled her eyes. "Never mind, mates. You'll see."

The group collectively shrugged and began making their way inside the school house, along with their fellow students. Twisty giggled as a few laughing foals ran past, calling to each other as they headed off to another day of basic learning and general funness. Scary let out an amused snort.

"Missing the old days?" she said cheekily, poking her friend in the side.

"Miss the arts and crafts, but I don't think I'm willing to let go of getting into R-rated movies." Twisty said as she entered the classroom.

"Same here," Scary giggled.

The classroom was fairly large, accounting for the various subjects Twisty and every other teenager in Ponyville was subjected to. Sure there was plenty of interesting stuff, but Twisty had difficulty grasping exactly why Principal Cheerilee insisted on such a harsh regiment of chemistry. It's like the mare had a fetish for the science.

Twisty took her seat and suddenly smiled, remembering that today was not a chemistry day, but rather history. History was relaxing, nothing upsetting, horrific, or overly difficult. Just a bunch of ponies doing things of varying degrees of interesting, with the occasional burst of excitement.

As the rest of the group took their seats around her, Twisty noticed that their usual teacher, Dusty Tome was not at her desk at the front of the class. In fact, the desk was empty an the chalkboard behind it was bare.

The last student was settling into their seat when Twisty turned to Ember, who sat to her right.

"Ember, what-"

Twisty was cut off by the sound of the class room door suddenly opening and a... well, Twisty did a double take. The creature did not walk in, rather she slithered. She was a serpent of some sort, and aside from the green scales and her reptilian head, she had little difference from your average Equestrian. From the waist up, at least. From the waist down her body was one long tail that stretched a few dozen feet in length as it followed its owner through the door.

The end of the tail closed the door as the serpent woman slithered behind Dusty Tome's desk and placed a case down on it. She smoothed out the dark blue suit she wore and adjusted the black reading glasses on her face as her tail coiled itself around the desk. She cleared her throat and then spoke.

"Good morning class," her voice had a deep, smooth tone, seeming to slide over your ears. "I am sure you're all wondering where Miss Tome is and who I am. As some of you may or may not know, Miss Tomb has had an unfortunate accident. There's nothing to worry about, but she is taking a much deserved vacation to recover. I am her temporary replacement and my name is-" she turned and picked up a piece of chalk, pressing it to the board and writing "-Valerie Morlin and in the classroom Miss Morlin will do just fine." she underlined her last name and set the chalk down.

She turned back to the class and continued. "Now, to get all the obvious questions out of the way, I am a Lamia and I come to you from the lovely county of Anguis. Look east of Griffonstone if you have the urge." she paused for a moment before adding, "And no, I haven't eaten anyone. Lately anyway," she winked and let a few seconds slip by before clapping her hands together. "So, let's begin!" She smiling widely. "I spoke with Miss Tome so I know you have just finished unit two. However, I thought that given the current circumstances and the date, perhaps we could indulge is both a bit of learning and entertainment."

The Lamia motioned with her hand and one of the students at the back of the class hopped automatically, wheeling the class's TV and VCR shelf to the from of the class. Twisty couldn't help but smile along with her fellow students as Miss Morlin pulled the much appreciated video cassette from her case.

"Now I have to warn you, you might actually learn something from this," the Lamia said with a smile as she popped in the video and retreated back to her desk, sitting down and dimming the lights.

"Surprising, huh," Ember whispered to Twisty.

"How did you know?" Twisty whispered back.

"Met her yesterday at the cafe,"

Ember nudged Twisty's left side. "Kind of odd she felt the need to say she didn't eat anyone?" the Thestral giggled

The tape started up as Twisty giggled softly in return.