Legend Of The Mega B Slap and other Button Mash x OC stories

by Space Kitty

Rating: mature
Tags: Comedy, Random, Slice of Life, Romance
Length: 1441

Romance can sometimes start with a mega b✨✨ slap.

Diamond Tiara is b✨✨ slapped by the new filly. This leads to Button Mash falling in love with her and… well, this happens.

If this shithole gets featured I'd eat a bowl of brocolli… and as you all know I fucking hate that stuff.

NO hate or "this needs improvement" comments, I write what I want. And Pi doesn't give a crap anyway. If she became alicorn she'd just teleport bread around.

Published 1970-01-01 00:00:00 UTC
Last updated 2015-10-04 21:00:01 UTC

Early

I look at my desk, plain as can be. It's Friday, and since Hearts And Hooves Day is tomorrow and we don't have school tomorrow, the valentiine exchange is today. I've already put all the valentines into the exchange box, and I'm drawing myself with an axe, fighting a giant red bipedal fox.

Button Mash enters the room among a ton of other foals. I get bored, so I play some Super Mareio until class starts.

The valentines are handed out, and I'm suprised when a VERY thick paper wad lands on my desk. I unfold it and read the poem in my head.

"Whoever wrote this is a riot!" I say in between bursts of loud laughter. "Oh my god, one of my least favorite poetry starters made hilarious!"

I can't stop laughing my cutie mark off. Then I open the rest of the valentines. Some ponies were actually putting thought into every valentine, while others were quite ignorant.  Button Mash opens his valentines, and I see he got his hooves on some cinnamon candies from those bullies.  I also got cinnamon Red Hots from them. I love that type of candy, along with mint. So I dump the entire bag that had been attached into my mouth and start chewing while Diamond Tiara just stares, mouth agape. Soon the entire class stares. While chewing all those I manage to draw a very nice picture of Princess Twilight Sparkle. Hey, I would draw anypony, my room was full of random drawings of Daring Do, The Wonderbolts, Princess Luna, my cousin Tres Pixel, and other ponies.

I swallow the candy and a few moments later...

Well, I burped fire. That scared the shit out of me, nearly literally. My drawing disappeared and the smoke flew out the window.

We went through the rest of the Valentines, and everything was fine. It is now recess.

I'm debating with Button Mash on whether or not 1.9 is going to ruin Minecraft.

A purple/magenta flash temporarily blinds me, flinging me back two feet. It's... what the buck? Twilight Sparkle? Did she somehow get ahold of my drawing?

"Did you... draw this?" the purple alicorn asks, holding up my drawing.

"Well, yes, I did. How'd you come across it? I thought it had been burnt!" I replied.

"Somehow this was sent to me by fire. I think I know what happened. What happened when the drawing got burnt?"

"I ate an entire bag of Red Hots and burped on it."

"Well,  that explains it. Spike's never been able to eat that many cinnamon candies. The last time he tried he had explosive diarrhea for a week and a half."

"TMI, Twilight."

"Wow, somepony calls me by my name rather than Princess. Finally." she says, and starts scratching her head with a hoof. "Mind if I put this in my art gallery?"

"I don't care what happens to my drawings as long as they're not destroyed." I reply.

And another flash of magenta light takes Twilight back home.

Button just stares and runs off.

Oh well.

Button's Crush

"Mom?" Button says.

"Yes Button?" his mother replies.

"I have a crush on... the new kid.."

"Oh my. You should tell her in some cute way, that's  how your father got me to become his special somepony!"

"Well... it is almost Hearts And Hooves Day..."

"Tell you what. We'll make a nice card, and you don't have to sign it."

"Ok mom! Great idea!"

Button got out a large sheet of red construction paper and set to work. He cut it in the shape of a pixel heart, and outlined it in black duct tape and when he ran out, black paper and permanent marker.

On it he wrote:

Roses are red

Violets are blue

I stink at poetry

I have a crush on you.

Meet me behind the fig tree.

With <3

Me

He folded it up very small so nobody would expect it, and wrote the name on it.

Then he added WitheredBonBon32 to his XBOX Live and started playing Mortal Combat.

Guess who got defeated fifteen times with "Hadougen".

Button ragequitted and they just played Minecraft. Raspberry found diamonds even before Button found IRON.

Button ragequitted that too.

Button ragequitted a lot of games.

Aaand then he fell asleep because it was eleven thirty.

Legend Of The MEGA Bitch-Slap

   I walk into the classroom, with my saddlebags sagging slightly. Bet you can't say that five times fast. Of course, they were stuffed with gaming devices. The teacher welcomes me and guides me to a seat. It's next to this colt named... erm, Button Mash, was it?

"Erm, hello everypony... My name is Raspberry Pi, nice to meet you all, please, just call me Pi." I say from my seat.

"Ha! Neeeeerd" came from the other side of the room. Great, fucking bullies.

"Ha, bullliiiieees" I reply.

The pink filly snorts and starts working on math. I simply pick up my pencil and start multiplying and dividing fast as possible, finishing my work in about five minutes. I then doodle on the back of my paper. It's my mother Circuit Board and my father Sodering Gun, as well as my sister, Winifred Millenium.  The colt next to me looks at my drawings.

"Hey, you draw very well..." he said, appearing to be nervous. Oh my lord, somepony likes my drawings.

"Thanks, it's my family. That's Circuit Board, my mom." I say, pointing at the green mare with the spiky white mane.

"The white and gray one with the strange looking mane?"

"My father, Sodering Gun."

"The filly in the strange dress?"

"My sister. Win Millenium."

The colt sighs and looks away, and I can tell he's blushing a bit. Ah well, I do have quite the swag that attracts colts.

"Hey. Here's my number, XBOX Live, Haystation, and Minecraft." I say, handing him a small torn off section of notebook paper.

"Thanks I guess..." he says, blushing a bit more.

I get out my Nintendo and start playing Agar.io as "The Crazed Butt Stabber" and start eating people from behind. Including Button Mash, who happened to be on the same server.  Man, that colt rage quitted hard.

Finally, after a gross lesson on why it's not good to eat packaged noodles, it's time for recess.

The sassy assed pink filly comes up to me and starts trying to persuade me to join them.

"Hell no." I say, and my hoof snaps back behind my head, and with a loud WHAP! I mega bitch slap the poor sucker and walk away.

Button walks up to me. "That was amazing! You could see an air cone!" he said out of pure exitement.

"I've stood up to bullies worse then those brats, don't worry." I reply, and I  go back inside for lunch.

A meeting

It was after school and I was behind the fig tree, like it said on the valentine. I was nervous, what if this was a trap?

Then Button Mash walked up to me. He sent the Valentine?

"U-uuhh, hi..." he says, quite pink. "I-I-I like you... Will you be my special somepony?"

It's quite obvious that I'm redder than my mane. My eyes are the size of bits. My ears fly downwards. And my eyes turn a dark shade of blue.

Crap, I've frozen AND gotten a bluescreen. Button runs off, crying. I can't bucking move, can he not realize that?

[Button's POV]

Oh my Celestia, what have I done! I think I broke her! I run off to find my mom, ready to pick me up from school.

"Why are you crying? Did you get rejected?" she asks.

"I-I asked her to be my special somepony and she just... froze! I think I broke her."  I reply.

"Oh my. Well, sometimes one way to break that is to do something  even more suprising." she says.

I guess I'll have to do it...

[Pi's POV]

Oh, he's walking back over here, great. He's trying to fix a bluescreen.

Wait, what the hell is he doing? OMG... he's kissing me...... wat wat wat wat

[Button's POV]

I actually did that... my mind is racing. Wait, she's moving again.  I fixed her I guess. She's kissing back? Oh my Celestia, she's hugging me too!

[Pi's POV]

I can't even believe this right now. We break apart, and Button's as red as an apple, and I'm redder than that if it's possible. Button runs off at possibly the speed of sound. He's talking to his mother. I walk home and start doing my homework, still very red.

I just play some XBOX and kick some butt  on PVP.