It's Tricky

Chapters

Do Your Thing
Good Times
Snow Patrol
All Night

Do Your Thing

Apple Bloom leaned forward on the bench, her chin settling against her hands. “Y’know somethin’, Scoots? I’m proud a’ ya. Ya got out in tha world, ya found some new friends, ya formed that stunt team ya always dreamed of, and yer travelin’ all over the place, earnin’ bits doin’ the impossible in epic stunt shows… Still, somethin’s been botherin’ me.”

Scootaloo adjusted her headset so she could hear Apple Bloom a little better. “What’s up?”

Apple Bloom pointed to the window, where the cloudy, snow-capped peak of Mount Mareu could be seen outside, only obscured by the passing propeller blades of the Daedalus brand chopper. “HOW IN THE HELL DIDJA AFFORD A FREAKIN’ HELICOPTER?!”

“Hard work and determination?” Sweetie Belle guessed. She was zipping up a white parka with a purple trim, while holding on to a pair of polka-dotted skis.

“Two out of three,” said Scootaloo. She snapped her goggles on and tightened her scarf. “Turns out, Velocentaur is getting really popular over in Neighpon. I struck a deal with a guy who was selling illicit merchandise, signed him on officially, and collected a pretty percentage of his earnings. Exchange rates got me a freakin’ mint. So, I decided to do a little Sunday shopping. Got myself some new decks, some video games, and, of course, a chopper!” She patted herself on the chest. “What’s up!”

“I think we’ve arrived at our destination, that’s what’s up,” said Sweetie Belle.

“What makes you say that?” Apple Bloom asked.

Sweetie pointed a mittened hand at the light above the side door, which had just turned from red to green.

Apple Bloom scratched the back of her head and looked out the window. The chopper was still obviously high up, far away from any sort of landing zone. “But we ain’t slowin’ down. Think the light’s busted?”

“Nope.” Scootaloo unbuckled her seatbelt and stood up. She checked her belt buckles, bent her board, and tapped her shoes. “We’re exactly where we— or at least, I— need to be.”

“What, ain’t we gonna land?” Apple Bloom asked nervously.

Scootaloo laughed like she just heard a lewd joke. “Where would we land? It’s all snow down below.”

“What?!” Sweetie shouted, holding her cheeks in disbelief. “I thought we were going to the resort! Spike’s waiting for me at the pool! He has wine! And those Gold Divas chocolates, they’re, like, a hundred bits a box!”

Scootaloo tapped Sweetie Belle on her snout. “You’ll get your wine, whiner. We’re just a good thousand or so feet higher than you expected.” She strolled over to the door and laid out her board, slipping her feet into the bootstraps. “You comin’?”

“Hell no!” Bloom yelled. “Aren’t you gonna put on a helmet?”

“Hell no.” With a smirk, as well as a flip of her upswept mane, Scootaloo opened the door, causing a frigid draft to enter the inside of the chopper. “Rotormouth!” she yelled towards the cockpit.

The pilot signaled to Scootaloo. “Yep?”

Scootaloo gestured behind her with her thumb. “Take these pansies back down to the resort once I make the jump!” She quickly turned to Sweetie Belle and Apple Bloom and mouthed, ‘Love you.’ She then took a step back towards the door, the front of her board hanging over the edge. She paused for a moment, then raised a finger. “You know…” She turned her head. “This speech is my recital...”

A small smile was shared between the three friends. Apple Bloom gripped the safety handle a bit tighter. “I think it’s very vital.”

Sweetie’s smile broadened as she winked at Scootaloo. “To rock—”

“A rhyme—” Apple Bloom bobbed her head.

“That’s right—”

“On time—”

Scootaloo pointed at her girls as she leaned back. “It’s Tricky is the title, here we go!” At the last word, the young daredevil let go and flipped into a freefall off the leeward side of the helicopter. A single gust of wind tore her out of view.

For a moment, fear gripped both Apple Bloom and Sweetie Belle as they stood and craned their necks to look for their feathered friend. A moment later, and an echoey “Woooo!” reached their ears over the sound of the helicopter’s engines.

With a relieved sigh, Apple Bloom reached to the still open hatch and pulled it closed. “Alright Rotor, get us to that resort!” As the helicopter started to turn back down the mountain, she retook her seat beside Sweetie. “I can’t honestly tell if that skinny mare is stupid or amazing,” she said.

“Bloom, dearest, you need to broaden your horizons and stop picking between two options.” Sweetie offered a little smile. “Scootaloo is obviously stupidly amazing.”

It was just a mile away, further down the mountain slope, that two slender, beautiful mares were lazily skiing along the smoothest, shallowest patch of snow they could find; it was so shallow that the use of their ski poles was almost unnecessary. One of the mares, who happened to be Diamond Tiara, closed her eyes and smiled, welcoming the crisp, frozen air with open arms.

“I told you a getaway would be worth our time, Silvy,” she said. “And yet, what was it you said to me? That snow isn’t becoming of a young lady’s complexion?”

Silver Spoon, in an odd reversal of the usual disposition between her and her best friend, pouted and folded her arms. “I didn’t give any specific reason as to why I don’t like snow. I just don’t like it.”

“Well, you have to have a reason. Otherwise it’s just pointless pouting over powdered perfection.”

“Ugh, since when are you so cheery? What happened to the aloof, prettier-than-thou, kiss-my-hand supermodel that I fell in love with?” Silver Spoon moaned, pointing her ski pole at Diamond Tiara. “Stop being happy!”

Diamond Tiara used her pole to nudge Silver Spoon’s back down. “Look ahead and pay attention. I don’t want you to wipe out. A collision with a tree is also not good for one’s complexion. Now, I suggest you remove the third ski pole you somehow placed up your ass, because it's dragging you down.”

Silver Spoon grumbled some derogatory words under her breath. She seemed determined to not enjoy herself on account of wanting to be elsewhere. “Fine… But I want it on record that I only came here to be with you. Also, I’m pretty sure I hate you now.”

Diamond Tiara chortled to herself. “I hate you too, dearest. But if you insist, we can rest for a while.”

Silver Spoon’s pout subsided a little bit. She looked down the slopes and took in the welcome view of the resort, a sprawling, multi-floored establishment that merged with the mountainside, branching off into several cottages. It was split down the middle by the slope, allowing riders to pass through and continue downwind. A few riders exchanged high-fives with their friends on the overhanging bridges as they passed by.

The two mares coasted to a stop by the front steps to the central lounge. Diamond Tiara stepped out of her skis with grace and poise, while Silver Spoon had to yank on her boot to get one of her skis off. “Bragginragginfraggin…” She flailed her hand at Diamond. “Help?”

“You are so helpless.” Diamond reached for Silver’s boot. “Give it to me.”

“Phrasing, boom…” Silver raised her stuck foot up to Diamond with a questioning look. “We still say that, right?”

“Yes, dearest, we still say, er, that…” Diamond tugged on the boot, but it didn’t come off. Tugs two and three didn’t fare much better. “Wow, damn thing’s lined with super glue. And velcro. And every other... ergh... adhesive under the friggin’ su-gah! There we go!” As Diamond Tiara pulled the boot away from Silver Spoon’s leg, she lifted it up high and cheered. “Yeah! Suck it, mountain! I am Mistress Tiara, destroyer of boots!”

“Uh, I think the high altitude is messing with your head,” said Silver Spoon.

Diamond raised her finger to retort, but she didn’t get the chance. A blur of black, orange and purple slammed into her, sweeping her off her feet and bringing her to the ground. Scootaloo was flung out of her bootstraps, and her face ended up planted into the snow.

Diamond was the first to get up, hopping to her hooves as though she wasn’t even hit in the first place. “Son of a…!” She turned around and shook her head as she saw Scootaloo, who rolled over and pumped her arms into the air.

“FUCK YEAH!” the daredevil cheered, though her scarf was covering her face, turning her voice into a muffled mess that sounded like “FERK YRRGH!” She ripped her scarf off. “Holy shit! That was amazing! There had better be a tattoo parlor here, ‘cause I’m getting a double-diamond insignia stamped right above my—”

“Hey!” Diamond Tiara folded her arms as she stood over Scootaloo. “Have you lost your mind?”

Scootaloo didn’t have a care in the world. She lay on her back, sweeping her arms and legs to make a snow angel. “Lost it years ago, babe… Why are you blushing?”

Diamond looked away. “I just got a faceful of snow, and don’t change the subject. You’d better hope nothing’s broken.”

“You’re standing. Your face is intact. Hope nothing happened downstairs, otherwise you’re out of a job.” Scootaloo bent her legs and leaped off of the ground, landing on her hooves. “You’re seriously okay though, right?”

“Huh?” Diamond Tiara did a double take and looked at herself. She patted her stomach, hips, shoulders, arms and legs, then fasted her fur cap over her head. “Y-Yes, I’m quite fine. And yourself?”

“Thanks to adrenaline and denial, I’m immortal!” Scootaloo flexed her arm, pulling down her jacket sleeve and showing off her arm. As she covered herself back up, she looked over Diamond Tiara, focusing on her skis. “Something tells me you don’t own those.” She kneeled down and examined the tribal pattern. She noticed a tag spelling out Mareu Mountain Lounge - Apparatus On Loan. “Are these rentals? Are you renting?”

“I’m rent with disgust that you’d suggest such a thing.” Diamond Tiara sighed. “Who buys something without giving it a test run? You’re a stuntmare. You rent motorcycles.”

Scootaloo laughed. “I’m just giving you shit, Di. I’m glad I gave you a new hobby.” She was bemused and slightly relieved to see Diamond Tiara chortling as well. “Thanks for making use of the tickets I sent you. The rest of the Crusaders are so used to my stunts that they don’t get all knobbly in the knees like you do.”

“Celestia’s wounds, you’re so full of it, you featherhead.”

Scootaloo gave a small laugh as she handed over Di’s skis, kicking her snowboard into the air and catching it her arms. “If I wasn’t, I’d probably be sitting scared shitless in Ponyville or somethin’. I don’t care what others think, and I don’t care what the math says; my math says I’m smokin’ hot and filthy rich, so just step up and call me ‘Daddy!’”

“Don’t tell me what to do,” Diamond Tiara scoffed.

Scootaloo licked her lips. “Mmm, that’s the spirit, baby girl.”

The bespeckled bystander brusquely barrelled into the conversation with a shove of the delinquent daredevil.

They had almost forgotten about Silver Spoon, but her impatience had become audible enough to call attention to her. “Yeah, sorry, but we’re not following half the shit coming out of your mouth, so I’m gonna go find a nice hot bath and a nice hot bellhop to scrub me down.”

Scootaloo flashed a devious grin. “Spike’s at the pool with a bottle of wine, waiting for his princess, if you want an easy time of it.”

“Thank you kindly.” Silver Spoon stretched her arms above her head as she stepped away from the conversation. “Di, you coming?”

Diamond Tiara turned back to Scootaloo. “Actually, I wanted to ask if Scootaloo here wanted a pot?”

Scootaloo’s devious grin intensified.

“Of coffee, Madame Radical.”

“Well, ever since I met Fluttershy’s new friends…”

“Offer’s slipping away.”

“Okay, okay. To the lounge.”

Good Times

Scootaloo leaned back her chair and sighed, pleased by the sight of the lounge’s rustic interior. The space between the ground floor and the ceiling was vast, to make room for the many mounted objects on the walls. Most of the wall decorations included extravagantly designed skis and snowboards, along with a few plated shields and plaques. There were also hand-stitched blankets instead of curtains, and the smell of smoked wood permeated the air, the source being the fireplace.

Diamond Tiara took a sip from her mocha. She was pleasantly surprised to see that the staff had tended to her order perfectly; there was a perfect balance of light and dark sprinkles, there were no folds or crinkles in the whipped cream, her straw was of the edible sort, and the flavor was consistent from the surface of the liquid to the bottom of the mug, which boasted a picture of Daring Do’s one-time reindeer sidekick Holly Hooves. It was absolutely perfect in every sense of the word.

She looked over at Scootaloo, who was taking a sip from her plain, plebian, standard blend coffee. “Hey, here’s a joke,” Scootaloo said. “How do you make a latte?”

Diamond Tiara lapped up the last of her whipped cream and traced the edge of her mug with her finger. “Add thirty bits to a cup of joe,” she said.

Scootaloo made a rimshot sound with her mouth, causing Diamond Tiara, as well as the other ponies sitting around the fireplace, cackle in sensible laughter.

An elderly mare sitting a bit closer to the fireplace, knitting a sweater as she listened in, spoke up when the laughs died down. “So, we know everything about your wonderfully nice model friend, but what about you?” she asked Scootaloo.

“Oh, you want a tale of my endeavors and feats?” Scootaloo replied. She seemed to be absorbing the attentions of everypony around the fireplace like it was a source of almighty power.

A muscular unicorn in a waiter’s suit leaned over the back of the armchair. “Well, shit, one or the other.”

“Ah-ah, language!” Scootaloo motioned towards Tiara. “We have ladies present.”

Diamond Tiara stuck her tongue out. “Boite me ya git, I’ll tussle ya roite good, I sware on me mum!” she cursed in a Scoltish accent.

“I’d swear on your mom…” Scootaloo snickered and took another sip of her coffee, and stood up to address the eagerly listening crowd. “Okay, dig this. I’ve just boozed myself to an inch from death, deep in the steel jungles of Manehatten, when outta the blue swoops in this stunning mare, tan-bronze coat, monochromatic mane flowing on the breeze, and I’m in love.” She pauses for effect. “Well, the alcohol’s in love, at least, but anyways! It was the famous Daring Do! She never comes to the Big Orange unless she’s doing something interesting! So, I follow her around a bit, and somehow sober up enough to help her kick flank when some goons try to gank her in an alley by the museum.”

“Didja die?” Diamond Tiara sarcastically asked.

“Yup, I’m a ghost. Dead as a shoenail, I am! But anyways, we duke it out, and send those fools packing. The big Double D recognizes me from one of my performances out near the Badlands, and recruits me for a job she’s on. She brings me on as a second pair of eyes while she collects an ancient tablet from a greedier treasure hunter. Dude pulls a harpoon gun on us, and I’m all like ‘Bruh.’”

Scootaloo’s audience leaned forward, their mouths simultaneously agape, except for the elderly mare. Her smile had changed into a motherly grin.

“So what do I do next, you ask?”

“Nopony asked. Go on,” Diamond Tiara snarked.

“I grab the manhole he was using as a shield right from under his smug face and use it as a luge. Suddenly we’re going down 20th at thirty degrees with sparks flying and punks coming from all directions. I’m steering the manhole while Daring Do has her legs spread over me. Not conventional, but hey, someone had to give directions. So next thing I know, the trolley comes out on the intersection, we’re surrounded on all sides, aaaaand…” Scootaloo had her hands up in the air as she trails off.

Diamond Tiara was gripping her mug abnormally tight, but she loosened her grip the moment she realized it.

“Well? We’re waiting?” the waiter asked.

Scootaloo returned to a standing position and bowed. “Find out in Daring Do’s twenty-second book, The Mad Mare of Manehattan!”

The entire crowd clapped and groaned simultaneously, returning from the edges of their seats. The elderly one’s applause was much more subdued. “Truly a magnificent tale, dearest.”

“Thank you kindly, Madam…” Scootaloo looked at the letters being stitched into the sweater. “Rocket Rider. I’ll get you an autographed copy of the book.”

“With the action figure included. I love those doohickeys.”

“Daring Do-hickeys…” Diamond Tiara muttered, much to Scootaloo’s amusement.

“Y’know, I don’t think Daring ever liked hickeys…” Scootaloo rubbed her neck as she returned to her seat. She picked up her mug and took another sip of coffee.

Diamond Tiara did so as well. Much to her grief, she had already drained her mug, with only a few traces of whipped cream and sprinkles remaining. “Ah, damn.”

Another mug appeared in the corner of her vision. She looked up and saw Scootaloo nudging it towards her. “Still thirsty? I’m done.”

Diamond Tiara looked between Scootaloo and the mug, suddenly feeling as though she were dropped into the final round of a game show, and if she gave the wrong answer, she would die. On the one hand, Scootaloo’s eyes were very convincing, glowing in the light of the fireplace. On the other hand, traces of her purple lipstick were visible on the rim of the mug.

“Di? Ya thirsty?” Scootaloo asked again.

“I don’t know what I am.” Diamond Tiara shrugged and took the mug. She decided to just avoid putting her lips wherever Scootaloo did. “T-Thanks, hon.”

“You’re welcome, hon.”

The word brought a touch of ire to her face, and her response was immediate. “Can it, dodo.” But that just caused her to become even more distressed. She pursed her lips and closed her eyes as if she was suddenly hit with static electricity. She stood up quickly. “I-I have to go to the bathroom.” She turned on the spot and walked up the nearby stairs.

Scootaloo whistled and nodded her head as she watched the impressive view of Diamond Tiara’s tight yet assuredly warm snow jeans clamped around her modelesque legs and bum. “Way to make a good show of leaving us.”

Diamond Tiara turned back around and sneered.

Scootaloo looked disappointed. “Ugh, why’d you spoil it?”

As Diamond Tiara tightened her fur cap over her head, Scootaloo opened the door to the lounge balcony. Only a few mountain dwellers dared sit out here in the cold, and they were the ones with unshorn fetlocks and muscles to spare.

On the way down the stairs away from the lounge, Diamond Tiara and Scootaloo passed by a minotaur and an accompanying group of muscleheads who were talking amongst themselves. Scootaloo could have sworn one of them said the words “Bodacious” and “Most excellent” in the same sentence. She felt a few of her brain cells die, mourned, and moved onward.

As she and Diamond Tiara crossed the bridge that overlooked one of the resort’s many courses, she got a better look at the lounge she and the rest of the Crusaders would be staying it. It was one of the classier suites, just south of luxurious.

Diamond Tiara was content with what she knew awaited them; a heated pool and multiple rooms with lots of furnishings, if the brochure could be trusted. But she still felt the need to fling something at Scootaloo. “Silver Spoon is gonna hate you for not splurging on the highest quality suite available, you know.”

Scootaloo shrugged as she stopped walking. “Tell her to deal with it. Luxury suites have a maximum capacity of two ponies, and that alone costs more than my sponsors spent on the tickets I gave to you, Silvy, the Crusaders and Spike.”

“Poor sponsors,” Diamond Tiara said with a mocking sigh. “So, what about you? Will you be sleeping in one of these legendary luxury suites of legend?”

“Am I getting a new tattoo next week? The answer is yes.” Scootaloo pulled the sleeves of her coat up and held her arms out for Diamond Tiara to see. Symmetrical sets of purple ink coated her fur, with curved lines on her forearms, accented bullseyes on her elbows, and tribal arrows on her upper arms. “Pretty impressive set, ain’t it?”

“Beautiful...” Diamond Tiara said in awe. She momentarily lost control of her hands, which touched Scootaloo’s forearms, stroking her tattoos. “Uh, for a punk. When did you get these?”

“The ones you’re fondling? Those were a gift from Rainbow Dash. She flew me into town, blindfolded me, and took me into the parlor. Next thing I knew, the shirt was off and I was getting some awesome marks etched onto my sacred temple of a figure.”

Diamond Tiara giggled. She stopped herself with her hand, covering her mouth as well as her blush. “Hopefully she took off the blindfold before they started stabbing you with needles.”

“Bitch, I can take a drill to the arm, I wouldn’t feel shit. I’m hardcore like that.” Scootaloo pulled her sleeves down. “Anyway, show’s over. Get a few shots in my system and I might show off the rest of my ink, but only if you ask nicely.” She pointed two fingers at Diamond Tiara and took ahold of her wrists. “In the meantime, I need to hear a story from you. What’s rattling in that gem-encrusted brain of yours?”

Diamond Tiara hunched, suddenly finding the wood panels of the bridge much easier to look at than Scootaloo’s face. “Uh, pose in skimpy clothes for the camera, act like the queen of the world, drink lots of champagne. That’s about it.”

“Oh, you. Come ooon, you travel half as much as I do, and that means you’ve got stories to tell.”

Diamond Tiara waved her arms at Scootaloo. “I don’t, really. You try on so many clothes, sell so many magazines and posters, eventually the days just blur together.”

Scootaloo nodded and gave Diamond Tiara a pat on the shoulder. “Yeah, I get that, though for me you gotta throw in a ten-eighty into a flagpole before the blurring happens. Otherwise, whenever I’m not doing my thing, the world moves way too damn slow.”

She turned towards the sun, which was just then touching the peak of Mount Mareu. Through the snow and clouds, its glow was muted, and yet all the more beautiful as its orange glow cast the whole mountain range in twilight.

Scootaloo was only able to take in the view for so long before she felt Diamond Tiara’s mit close around her hand. Again, the normally regal and uptight belle was reduced to a stammering, blushing mess. “B-bet it makes the world a bit easier to appreciate, huh? Especially when you’re… airborne so much?”

“Yeah, but it can get a little lonely up there.” Scootaloo put her other hand over Diamond Tiara’s mit. “Glad to see somepony wants to join me.”

Diamond Tiara’s blush might as well have never existed in the first place. She stuck her muzzle upward and said, “I didn’t imply such a thing.”

“Okay, fine, I’ll teach you how to ride!” Scootaloo said, feigning ignorance to her huffiness. She pulled Diamond Tiara along the bridge towards the cabins. “I mean, jeez, if you’re gonna insist so much!”

“I don’t want to ‘ride’, you airhead! I came here to relax!”

“Relaxation is relative. You gotta sprinkle some fun between your downtime. Now, let’s get those slender legs back into your ski shoes!”

“You could be at the spa. You could be getting stripped down for a deep tissue massage and a hot bath. You could be whispering dirty words to the towel boy while he serves you champagne.” Diamond Tiara sighed. “You’re taking ski lessons from Daredevil Von Dyke.”

And yet, despite her disgruntled mood, she couldn’t help but smile at the sight of the stunt complex. The place had a halfpipe in the center, and it was surrounded on two sides by ramps and adjacent grind rails. Most of the ponies making use of it ranged from little kids to inexperienced adults, which made a certain orange pegasus’ antics all the more of a standout performance.

Scootaloo made use of her wings to accelerate up one of the ramps, leap off, and go into a spin. Diamond Tiara held her breath as it looked like she was going to come up short, but Scootaloo apparently planned for that, planting her hand on the edge of the opposite ramp. She stayed there for a moment, then twirled around, using only her hand for support. Then, she let go, landed her snowboard against the vertical wall of snow, and went into the half pipe.

She turned slightly as to hit the jump diagonally. With another leap, she was up in the air once again, grabbing the lip of her board as she did a backflip. She landed outside of the complex on a pile of snow, causing a small explosion of powder at her boots. She cast her hands up to the sky and let the snow fall upon her.

As she spun in place on the tail of her board, she kept her gaze fixed on Diamond Tiara, who tucked her ski poles under her arm and politely applauded. She tried to hold in the desire to openly cheer.

“Impressed, sweet thing?” Scootaloo asked with another spin. She hopped her board over to Diamond Tiara, her hands firmly on her hips.

At the risk of going off on a tangent, Diamond Tiara asked, "Why do you like hanging out with me, again?"

Scootaloo clicked her tongue. "Well, you're a walking slapstick comedy and you make goo-goo eyes at my most basic stunts, so that's two things."

“Think of one more and maybe you’re my new best friend,” Diamond Tiara said with a scoff.

“I’ll think of one, don’t worry.”

Diamond Tiara made a sharp beeping noise. “Nope, too late. You’ve failed the friendship test. You may reapply in two years.”

Scootaloo rolled her eyes. “Freakin’ logistics, dude. See you in two years.” She pulled her boots out of the straps on her board, picked it up, and flapped her wings. “I have a presidential suite with my name on it, so…” She kicked off the ground.

Diamond Tiara’s eyes widened. “No, wait!” She dropped her ski poles and leaped after Scootaloo, throwing her arms around her legs. “Don’t go!”

Scootaloo ended up face down, making out with the snow. She shook it out of her hair and turned to Diamond Tiara with an incredulous smirk. “Heheh…”

Diamond Tiara dusted the powder off her legs and folded her arms. “What?”

Scootaloo pointed at her. “You like hanging out with me!”

“Ugh.” Diamond Tiara looked sick to her stomach. “Do you really want to know why I’ve been following you around all day?”

“Humor me.”

“If I must be entirely honest, I wanted to see if I could bum off your luxury room if I sweet talked you enough, but you’re making it incredibly difficult to me to like you when you’re acting like a mad mare. Doing all those flips and shit, you’re gonna hurt yourself someday!”

Scootaloo didn't look nearly as concerned as Diamond Tiara. “Dude, I’ve been in the hospital three times,” she says without humor.

“...Come again?”

“This year. Celestia bless socialized health care.” Scootaloo stuck out her leg. “Imagine this thing about ninety degrees thataway,” she said, pointing to her left. “Apple Bloom kept calling me ‘6:15’, it was hilarious.”

“Yeah, hilarious…” Diamond Tiara clenched her fingers into fists, just for a second, before sighing. “So… can I see your luxury suite, please?”

Perplexed, but also amused by this mood shift, Scootaloo smiled and took Diamond Tiara’s hand, much to her surprise. She pulled her into an embrace, clutching her from behind as she spread her wings.

“I don’t know how much you read into that, but—”

“I’ll show you the damn luxury suite.”

Snow Patrol

A security guard in a formal winter coat and thick sunglasses stood in front of the ornate double doors of the luxury hotel. “Name?” he asked as Scootaloo and Diamond Tiara approached.

“Roadblock, baby, c’mon.” Scootaloo gestured to herself with an innocent smirk. “C’mon.”

“You think I don’t know who you are, Scootaloo? I’m asking about her.” Roadblock nudged his head towards Diamond Tiara.

“C’mon?” she said meekly, before clearing her throat and hunching her shoulders. “D-Diamond Tiara.”

Roadblock looked over his clipboard, sucking on his teeth as he frowned. “Sorry, Miss. You ain’t on the list. You can’t even get to the lobby unless you’ve already got a room reserved.”

“Are you serious?” Diamond Tiara griped. “Do you not know who I am?”

“Are you on the list?”

“Uh, no?”

“Then I don’t know you. That’s how things work in Roadblock’s world. Your world’s thataway, Miss.” He pointed down the winding staircase Scootaloo and Diamond Tiara took to get here. The snow was falling hard enough to have already covered their tracks.

Scootaloo noticed Diamond Tiara’s disappointed scowl. She looked around, pondering what she should do. She came to a conclusion when she noticed the multiple gem-embroidered rings on Diamond Tiara’s fingers. She thanked Celestia that the young model was so inept when it came to proper attire for an athletic environment.

Scootaloo sighed and stepped closer to Diamond Tiara. “Oh, that’s right, I never told you. I’ve been trying hard to keep it under wraps, you know how the paparazzi can be with celebrity weddings.” She took Diamond Tiara’s hand and held it tight.

Diamond Tiara felt a firework go off in her brain, fearing for a moment that smoke would fizzle out of her ears. She played along, looking at Scootaloo with the best loving gaze she could manage on short notice. “Oh, you forgetful scamp!”

Scootaloo stepped even closer to Diamond Tiara, to the point where they could easily join their hands together behind their backs. Diamond Tiara slipped one of her rings onto Scootaloo’s finger. As soon as it went on, Scootaloo flashed her ring to Roadblock. “It was fantastic. Small private party at the rec center in Ponyville, we had a smorgasbord of cupcakes instead of an actual cake. Saved us a hundred bits.”

“They were delicious, that’s what mattered.” Diamond Tiara, wanting to ensure that the lie was complete, kissed Scootaloo on the cheek and held her shoulders. “As are you, pumpkin-spice.”

Scootaloo giggled loudly. “Staaahp, you’re embarrassing me.”

“She’s not the only one,” Roadblock said. He opened the glass door and gestured inside. “Try not to make everyone inside puke, okay? And, uh, congratulations.”

“Come on, babe!” Diamond Tiara pushed Scootaloo forward. “Finally, some time alone...”

The doors to the luxury hotel went shut behind the two, but Diamond Tiara’s arms remained firmly around Scootaloo, who smiled despite the creeping awkwardness. Not that she minded having a model so close to her, but something seemed off about the model in question suddenly seeming so relaxed and… smiley.

“Lie’s over, you can let go now.”

“Oh.” Diamond Tiara pulled away from Scootaloo and brushed her hands on her winter coat. “Well, you’re lucky I have a lightning-fast wit.” She looked around the lobby, eyes brightening at the sight of the warm, colorful carpets and large windows that displayed a humbling view of Mt. Mareu and her many slopes.

“Yeah, this place is a little stiff compared to the common lounge…” Scootaloo said, dragging her fingers along the empty mahogany tables. “Honestly, I kinda prefer the company of families and recreational skiers down below.”

Diamond Tiara did not hold the same sentiment, pretending to swoon on the spot. “I think I’m in heaven. Oh, Scootaloo! Pinch me!”

Scootaloo smirked. “Where?”

Before Diamond Tiara could answer that question, Scootaloo noticed seven middle-aged suited-up businessponies gathered around the largest table in the lobby. They were quietly discussing something over large line and bar graphs, along with several typed documents, all next to a large plate of muffins. They seemed very much into it.

It was no surprise to Diamond Tiara that Scootaloo decided to skip on over to the businessponies, take a loud bite out of a muffin, and ask, "Hey, business guys, how's the business?"

Diamond Tiara facepalmed harder than anypony in Equestria had facepalmed that day, or would ever facepalm that day.

Scootaloo wasn't done yet. "So, I commerce that we merger the payraise to establishment and business the flowchart to projection and office space and first quarter analysis. Who's with me?"

Diamond Tiara grabbed Scootaloo by the wrist, almost tempted to scratch her arteries open so she could stop humilating her. "Stop making a fool out of yourself!"

"Hey, chill the business out." Scootaloo asked, shaking her off.

Four of the businessponies seemed to be resisting the urge to burst out laughing. Two of them didn't have the willpower to hold it in and were cackling madly. Only one didn't seem to be amused, but that was easily explained when Diamond Tiara and Scootaloo noticed the Germane flag pin on his suit.

As she was dragged to the stairs, Scootaloo said in a hurry to the Germane pony, "Ich entschuldige mich für meine Stunts, aber ich bin ein stuntmare. Haben Sie einen Werktag."

“You speak Germane?” Diamond Tiara asked, caught by surprise.

“Ich reise in der ganzen Wel— I mean, I travel all over the world, I have to know at least a few languages.”

Diamond Tiara let go of Scootaloo’s wrist when they got to the elevator. “No more that me, I’m sure.”

“Germane, Prench, Saddle Arabian, Maretonian—”

Diamond Tiara smashed her hand on the elevator call button. “Dammit!”

“Welcome to my world, Di,” Scootaloo said as she turned the key in the lock and opened the door. She threw her jacket on the floor, adjusted her casual black shirt and cargo pants, and swaggered in like she owned the place. “I might as well own this place!”

Diamond Tiara also stripped out of her coat, leaving her in a humble magenta turtleneck and white slacks. She slammed her hands to her lips, chortling to herself. She was in awe of the view, which was even more impressive than down below. The peak of Mt. Mareu right in the center, in line with the foot of the bed. As for the bed itself, it was large enough to hold at least four ponies and a dog. She dove right onto it, messing up Scootaloo’s special order lightning bolt covers. “I’ve had dreams about falling asleep in these kinds of beds, and you’ve made that dream come true.”

Scootaloo made a sweeping bow, then turned on her heel to face the phone on the bedside table. “Think of a few ways to thank me.” She grabbed the phone and tapped three numbers with dramatic flair. As the dial tone droned into her ear, she sat down on the bed.

“Who’re you calling?” Diamond Tiara asked as she grabbed a pillow and huggled it close to her stomach.

“Room service, what else?” Scootaloo said. She then spoke into the phone. “Hey there, Sweet Treat, you sexy bitch! Yeah, me again, same room. My sponsors just spoil me, don’t they? Anyway, why don’t you get your hot buns up here and show me the dessert tray. Oh, and I have a model friend with me, so make sure you bring enough sugar to put her out of a job.” Scootaloo nodded. “Alright. See you in five, baby doll.”

“‘Baby doll?’ ‘Sexy bitch?’” Diamond Tiara asked with an exaggerated slur. “You kiss your mom with that mouth?”

Scootaloo set the phone down. Her smile disappeared right off her face as she stared at Diamond Tiara. “No, because she’s dead.”

Every single sound that had been audible a second ago suddenly went mute. Diamond Tiara’s pointer finger was stuck pointed upward, her mouth slightly open. She feared what would happen if she broke eye contact with Scootaloo.

Scootaloo smirked and broke out laughing. “I wish I had a mirror for your pretty face.”

Diamond Tiara, still in aftershock, chuckled uncomfortably. “Y-You think I’m pretty?” As her discomfort and laughing stretched into an awkward silence, she felt a rising desire to burst into flames.

Scootaloo grabbed a magazine off the TV stand. It had an impressive photograph of a young stallion doing a nosegrab on his skateboard, while leaping over a traffic light. “I hope I’m not giving you mixed signals,” she said. She flopped onto the bed next to Diamond Tiara. “You know I just like a good reaction.”

“Why are you so untouchable?” Diamond Tiara asked, leaning on her shoulder. “I can never keep up with you.”

Scootaloo’s eyes were focused on an article for bikini wax. The model was a muscular pegasus who lay on her front as her equally fit and equally scantily dressed lady friend applied the wax. “Much like these two, you have to stand still for the camera.” She turned the page to one of Velocentaur’s photographs, this one of Scootaloo doing an airborne handstand on her board. “I have to break land speed and airtime records. It’s not rocket surgery, babe. We’re just on different levels.”

“Can I at least level with you, then?” Diamond Tiara asked, with desperation coming off of her tongue. “You’re so… disarming.”

Scootaloo threw the magazine onto the floor. She peered up at Diamond Tiara from where she lay. The young model’s face was flipped from her point of view. “Well, you’re upside down.” Scootaloo rolled over and supported herself on her hands and knees. “Now you’re not.”

“And you’re…” Di finally had herself a genuine laugh. “You’re… really special.”

Like an anime hero in an overblown, dramatic final battle, Diamond Tiara summoned all of her strength and courage into a single act. She slammed her hands to Scootaloo’s cheeks, pressed forward, and brought her lips to Scootaloo’s.

All Night

It was… messy. Diamond Tiara pulled away from the kiss as quickly as she had moved in. She could taste purple lipstick on the tip of her tongue.

Scootaloo snorted and tapped her fingers to her lips. “A ton of things just started making sense.” She stretched her arms out and got off the bed. “Welp, guess I can postpone a few black diamonds for tonight. There’s a sexual joke about your name in there, but that’s beneath me, and frankly I’m just too hyped about this to crack jokes anyway.”

Diamond Tiara, fearing that she may be more confused about her own actions that Scootaloo was, leaned forward. “Define ‘this,’” she politely requested.

And just like that, she was leaning back as Scootaloo leaped onto the bed and crawled over her like a creeper. She, her lithe body, and her devilish grin got so close to Diamond Tiara that she could smell the remnants of grape cologne. “I think I know an admirer when I see one. Plus, I love the fact that you have ‘need it bad’ written all over you in permanent marker.”

Suddenly having jumped the hurdle, Diamond Tiara felt a lot more comfortable in her own shoes, which she kicked to the floor. “I tried really hard to erase it, Scoots, but it wouldn’t come off.”

The two young mares felt the fur of their muzzles intertwine. “I’m willing to help it come... off.” Scootaloo whispered. She reached around Diamond Tiara, her arm curling along her back and reaching down her body to grab

a small remote. She handed it to her wide-eyed paramour. “Use the purple buttons to mess with the mood lighting. The one with the three dashes controls the blinds. I’ma be right back, seeing as you messed up my lipstick…” Scootaloo rolled away, hopping off the bed again. She pulled her shirt over her head and threw it at Diamond Tiara. “You can pose for me in that later.”

Diamond Tiara had just a few precious seconds to soak in a glimpse at Scootaloo’s naked torso. A stomach as flat and strong as concrete, acting as a thin layer over shifting athletic muscles, all beneath her orange coat and purple tattoos, and perky breasts that shimmered in the thick sun of the winter evening.

And it was gone the instant Scootaloo disappeared into the bathroom with a wink.

Diamond Tiara didn’t waste time on acting like Scootaloo was the first naked girl she’d ever seen, burying her aghastness to prepare for her return. Her surprise was quickly waning, replaced with something she had been sorely missing: excitement.

She smiled widely as she fiddled with the remote, flicking through different romantic light settings as she lowered the blinds. There were the usual settings, like dim magenta and purple, along with some more unusual settings. One particular light doused the entire room in a thick navy blue, reminding Diamond Tiara of some of the more high-end nightclubs she’d spent time at with Scootaloo, spending idle hours chugging neon-colored, overpriced drinks.

Fond of those memories as she was, she settled on something a little more mellow, but with a fair bit of excitement. A few more clicks of the remote led her to a simulated disco ball effect, bathing the room in rotating sparkling lights.

With that done, Diamond Tiara stood up, suddenly feeling as though she were in one of her fantasies, aside from a sexy dress to impress her incoming lay. In a perfect world, she’d be wearing a translucent red dress over laced, elegantly stitched undergarments.

Scootaloo would just have to settle for seeing her in the old SWBP: simple white bra and panties. Diamond Tiara pulled down her pants, then moved on to her turtleneck. It was the one time she wished it didn’t cling to her body so perfectly. Throwing it off resulted in her falling back onto the bed.

“You okay in there?” Scootaloo asks. “Hanky panky and concussions don’t go well together, and I speak from experience.”

“I’m fine, keep your shirt on— I mean, off,” Diamond Tiara said.

All that remained to complete the picture was a pose. Diamond Tiara rotated through her standbys. First, she lay on her front to present her ass, but it felt wrong. She knew hers would pale in comparison to Scootaloo’s. It felt like sacrilege.

Her next post involved spreading her legs over the edge of the bed, but that felt wrong too. Such raunch was for less dignified nights, usually involving someone of the male specimen. Or two. Or three… Diamond Tiara forced her fond memories of Haywi’i down and focused on the present.

She decided to do something new and different. She pulled her legs back onto the bed, wrapped her arms around her legs and and huddled them close to her belly and chest. “I’m ready when you are,” she said, her voice shaky yet resolute.

Scootaloo strutted out of the bathroom. She had reapplied her lipstick, adjusted the spikes in her mane to be a little more organized, and completely removed all of her underwear. Diamond Tiara wasn’t at all disarmed by the lightning bolt patch etched above her slit. “Hey,” she said casually, throwing her boxer-briefs away. She took notice of Diamond Tiara’s regal yet sexy pose, and chuckled at it. It was really her eyes that caught her attention. “Aw, you’re melting my heart.”

“Did you forget who’s the ice queen here?” Diamond Tiara asked, snickering to herself. “Ugh, I’m gonna get laugh lines.”

“That’s a bad thing?”

Diamond Tiara’s smile disappeared. “It is when you’re supposed to look like you don’t care about the slavering masses watching your every movement as you trot up and down the catwalk like a deathrow inmate or a changeling on parade.”

Scootaloo gave her a small frown of confusion. “Uhh, don’t you like... live for that kind of attention?”

Diamond Tiara snorts. “You remember grad week, right? When you and the other Crusaders came and picked up my shattered ego after Twist snapped it like a ginger snap?”

“Oh, you mean when she broke it like a jawbreaker?”

“Crushed it like a candy cane.”

“Smashed it like a chocolate liquor... fuck, now I’m hungry.” Scootaloo sat down on the bed. “I thought it was room service o’clock, like, ten minutes ago.”

Diamond Tiara snorted and shook her head. “Sorry, off topic, but yeah. You three came and helped me get back on my hooves when all I wanted was a pint of ice cream and a rock to crawl under.” She ran a hand through her mane, smiling wryly. “You guys taught me that I could strut my stuff without being a hypercunt about it, and while I love flaunting... I hate having to act like the ponies watching me aren’t people. It... brings back awkward memories.”

Scootaloo patted Diamond Tiara on the head and stroked her ear, which flicked at her touch. “Hey, at least if you trip on the catwalk, you’re still beautiful. If I trip…”

“You get fucked up.”

“I can walk away from fucked up, it’s when I get fucked over that people should be worried.” Scootaloo cackled. “I remember this one time I was roller-blading the Running of the Leaves course, one of my wheels came loose and I went off course juuuust enough to end up wrapped around an alder tree.” She wrapped her hand around her opposite thumb. “Like a sheet of licorice.”

Diamond Tiara gasped. “Holy shit...”

“Yeah, my spine was so gnarled that my wing joints got all bent out of shape. Hurt like hell just to spread them. Doctors were worried I wouldn’t fly ag—”

It happened so fast. Diamond Tiara uttered a little whimper, then reached out and leaped at Scootaloo, knocking her to the bed. She uttered a small “Wuh—” before Diamond’s lips slammed into hers.

Diamond Tiara was hellbent on not letting Scootaloo open her mouth for anything except tongue. Diamond Tiara’s tongue prodded at her lips, once again tasting the grape flavor of her glossy lipstick. Her mouth parted as her tongue came out to greet Diamond Tiara’s, and with it came sweet saliva that tasted like some sort of off-brand energy drink.

For Scootaloo, the smells of Diamond Tiara’s fruity perfume and lemon-scented hair product were intense enough to tickle her nostrils and fill her with zest. It drove her to ravish Diamond Tiara with strong caresses of her agile fingers. She loved the tender smoothness of Diamond Tiara’s expertly groomed fur; she truly lived up to her namesake. Even her tongue was smooth, her saliva savory, her little gasps and moans with the capacity to drive even the most conservative pony insane… Scootaloo was giddy just thinking about what she was going to do to this mare.

One question remained, though. Scootaloo broke the kiss, realizing how much combined saliva had dribbled down her chin, and asked, “Where the hell did that come from?” with a big smile.

Diamond Tiara answered honestly, squeezing Scootaloo’s breast and saying with honey in her voice, “I want you.”

Scootaloo pursed her lips, suspecting that she wasn’t being told the full story. But she could tell when Diamond Tiara was being honest. She was good at many things, but lying was not one of them, so if she said she wanted Scootaloo, then nopony could argue against it.

Scootaloo tightened her grip on Diamond Tiara, holding her close like the most intimate lover she’s ever had the pleasure of taking to bed with her. “That’s cool by me,” she cooed into her ear. “Feeling’s mutual. I couldn’t take my eyes off ya all day.”

“I can’t believe I’m in bed with you!” Diamond Tiara blurted out, giggling maniacally. “I really, really… want to make you feel good.”

“You wanna make me feel good?” Scootaloo asked incredulously, nipping at Diamond Tiara’s ear and kissing her cheek. “Miss High and Mighty Supermodel, Object of Everypony From Hell to High Water’s Fantasy?”

"Well, that's in front of the camera... Maybe, when I'm not in front of one, I want to actually fulfill some of those dreams?" Diamond Tiara’s nails dug into Scootaloo’s shoulders. “Listen, daredevil… Tell me what you want, and I’ll do it to you so good.”

Scootaloo put her arms behind her head and batted her eyelashes at Diamond Tiara. “Touch me. Touch me hard.”

Diamond Tiara kissed and groped Scootaloo, giving her mouth a small extra helping of tongue, before it to her neck. Loving nips and bites travel all the way down to her breasts, which aren’t big enough to warrant anything beyond a little pawing and sensual licks and bites of each nipple. It at least creates enough bursts of pleasure in Scootaloo’s loins to make her legs shift.

“I feel like I’m in a dream right now…” she murred.

“Huh?” Diamond Tiara brought her head up in the midst of a long lick along Scootaloo’s muscular belly.

Scootaloo spoke calmly, despite her heavy breaths and practically luminescent blush. “Look, this ain’t gonna be a shocker… You’re smoking hot. And, well, we've all got our lonely nights. Maybe, once a month, I just head into my room and grab a magazine at random...”

Diamond Tiara stopped working her tongue entirely as she felt a hot wave of humility wash over her. She rose up from Scootaloo’s body. “You do that to… who?”

"Somepony who dominates the centerfolds a lot of the time... shapely figure, great rack, thick as a brick ass, likes skimpy clothing..." Scootaloo shuddered and reached down along her body. She moaned as her fingers grazed over her moistening slit. “Mmm… She’s in bed with a pretty incredible athlete right now, aah...”

“Hey, hey.” Diamond Tiara grabbed Scootaloo’s wrist. “Stop touching yourself, sweet cheeks. That’s my job.”

“You know me. Impossible to sit still... think you can give me something to do?” Scootaloo stuck out her tongue at Diamond Tiara, smiling lightly. “I mean, you know all about sitting still for the camera.”

Diamond Tiara kissed Scootaloo again as her hands gripped her waist. “Nuh-uh. I’m not waiting anymore. Besides, you need to relax.” She licked her lips before shifting down Scootaloo’s body, moving her hands so she had both of the orange mare’s wrists in her grip. She slipped off the bed and kneeled down, pinning down Scootaloo’s limbs with her arms as she eyed the pink treasure between those wonderful orange legs, an airy giggle escaping her. “Just think of it like, uh, surfing.”

“Hang ten…” Scootaloo gasped. She watched Diamond Tiara with sheer lust and anticipation painted on her face. The moment she felt that soft tongue brush her slit and part it open, she hissed and fell back onto the bed hard. “Oh, fuck, here we go...” She sighed in contentment. Her arms splayed out helplessly, her fingers tensing up and relaxing with no pattern.

Diamond Tiara kept her eyes mostly shut as her tongue took on a mind of its own and ravished Scootaloo. Her restless nights with Silver Spoon, born from boredom or an excess amount of alcohol, taught her the proper technique behind a good eating. She lapped at the lower half of Scootaloo’s enlarging pink folds, while her thumb prodded and rubbed the upper half, never quite coming into contact with that sensitive little nub that yearned to be touched.

Scootaloo was whispering exclamations of pleasure to herself. “Fuckin’... Oh, geez, that demon tongue… Get in there, you…”

“Ahh, I said ‘relax’...” Diamond cooed, smiling as she nuzzled the top of Scootaloo’s wet passage and gave it another lick. “That means don’t say a thing, and let me do my thing. After that... well, you can do whatever you want to me. Okay?” She winked, and only resumed when Scootaloo slowly winked back. “Okay.”

“Okay... fuck.” Scootaloo relaxed again. Suddenly she found herself hissing and holding back a shout. “Yep, y’ bumped it...”

Diamond Tiara giggled as she looked down at her nose, tongue just beginning to bury itself into her lover’s vagina, and sure enough, the sensitive nub was pressed up against it. Smiling devilishly, she pressed up against it more, nuzzling it gently as she reached further with her tongue, lapping around inside the sweet-tasting canal she’d found. Scootaloo tensed at the nuzzling, trying to move some part of her body and get a hand to one of her breasts, but Diamond Tiara’s grip was like a snazzy pair of handcuffs.

Huh... there’s an idea, Scootaloo mused. Did I bring those— Oh, Celestia, yeeeess… Even her thoughts couldn’t hold it together with Diamond Tiara’s teeth gently closing around her clit. Her fluids broke loose, leaking over the muzzle of the otherwise untainted and poised model that brought them out.

Diamond Tiara’s head came up from Scootaloo’s nethers, her grin illuminated by the spinning disco lights. “It seems I’ve caused the mighty daredevil to crash.”

“Oh, go sit on your face,” Scootaloo gasped.

Diamond Tiara climbed onto the bed, crawling on her hands and knees up and over Scootaloo. “Is that an offer, my dear?” She purred and licked her lips, which she brought tantalizingly close to Scootaloo’s.

And then an interruption came a’knocking. Diamond Tiara shrieked as she heard the dreaded call of “Room service!”

“Damn it all, I completely forgot!” she yelled. She hid under the covers and grabbed the largest pillow on the bed, trying to make a modest image of herself, but to Scootaloo, it was just another pin-up to ogle while she went to the door. Aside from a slight stutter to her walking from a recent orgasm, she had no shame to dampen her swagger… not that she wasn’t damp.

Scootaloo opened the door, completely apathetic to (or deliberately ignorant of) Sweet Treat’s stunned surprise. “Hey, doll.”

Sweet Treat pushed her glasses up her muzzle. “Uh, hello, sir. Looking good as ever...”

“I try. Brought what I ordered?” Scootaloo grinned as she leaned on the doorframe, arms folded under her breasts. As cool and collected as ever, however much the sweat on her disagreed.

“I did indeed! Five trays of the best sweets and treats we have to offer.”

“Does that include you?” Scootaloo grinned, giggling as she saw a blush light up on Treat’s face.

“We’ve already been over this, sir... I’m not on the menu, sorry.” Sweet Treat stuck out her tongue a bit at the mare before grabbing the trolley and wheeling it around, Scootaloo making way as she pushed it in through the door. Sure enough, it was a tower of confection. A double-decker vanilla cake surrounded by alternating small cups of chocolate and strawberry ice cream, as well as two mugs of hot lemon tea. It was enough decadence to make a pony explode, or to bring them up from rock bottom.

“Enough sugar to heal broken bones… Heheh, awesome.” Scootaloo rubbed her hands together and quickly closed the door, walking on over to the bed. “Set it all up on the table, Sweets. Also, I will gladly pay you to take the rest of the night off and stick around.”

Sweet Treat sighed, rubbing the back of her neck and frowning. “Much as I’d love to hang out with you and your friend, I’ve still got my shift to tend to. But, if you’ll have me, I’m off in a few…” Her eyes widened as she took a gander at Diamond Tiara. “Wait, Scootaloo, isn’t that—”

“Yes, it is, and she has been insanely pleasant.” Scootaloo nuzzled Diamond Tiara’s snout, and the favor was returned with more adorable purring. “And we’re spending the whole damn night together.”

We are?! Diamond Tiara screamed in her head.

“Well, uh, I hope you enjoy your time together. I get off late tonight, so…”

Scootaloo took on a modelesque pose for Sweet Treat. “So just be sure to knock, yeah? I’ll probably be out cold.”

“Surprised you haven’t passed out already with how you look...”

“Eh, give her another half hour, maybe she’ll make it happen.”

Diamond just whimpered quietly as she listened to the conversation, and the resulting laughs between the two mares. Wow, I’m right here, y’know...

Scootaloo grabbed one of the ice cream cups and took it over to Diamond Tiara. She stuck a spoon into it and handed it over. “Enjoy yourself, sugarlips. You’re on vacation.”

Diamond Tiara took the ice cream cup and reluctantly took a bite. Immediately, she was compelled to eat several more bites very quickly, even forgoing the use of a napkin to wipe her mouth. “What’s in this stuff? It’s amazing!”

“Imported from Braejing,” Sweet Treat explained. She was trying as hard as she could to not ogle the two bedfellows. “Now then, I’ll be on my way. Don’t want to cramp your style.”

“Honey, you could never commit such an atrocity,” Scootaloo said.

With a bow and a smile, Sweet Treat turned and made her way out, a little skip in her step and her hands held behind her back.

Scootaloo held back a grin and a giggle until the mare had left the room and closed the door behind her. Shook her head a bit. “Sheesh, her name fits her too well.”

“Don’t tell me you’ve tasted her treat...” Diamond smiled, speaking between bites of her ice cream. The velvety cream, the sweet strawberry flavor, how it coated her tongue in sugary goodness, it all blew her mind. Okay, I have to get a bucket of this stuff for home.

“Heh, I’ve tried to. Just a liiiittle out of reach...” Scootaloo smirked, shrugging as she leaned up against Diamond, spreading her wings and draping one over her shoulder. “Someday, though.”

“Hehe, talking about another lover when you already have one in bed? For shame, Scootaloo.” Diamond smiled, raising an eyebrow at the pegasus. “That’s a real taboo, y’know.”

“Ain’t a taboo to love everybody. Isn’t that one of the big things about harmony?” Scootaloo raised her own eyebrow, pouting a little. “C’mon, is it so wrong to spread a little love over everyone?”

“You spread it over my face, yeah…” Diamond Tiara muttered. “Well, I guess not, but it could end up making someone a little jealous...”

“Pffff! You? Jealous? You’ve got every stallion in ponyville in your pocket, sweetheart.” Scootaloo turned up her nose slightly and snapped her fingers, putting on a noblemare’s pout. “Jeeves! Get me three stallions!”

Diamond Tiara grinned, giggling to herself. “Oh, if only it worked like that. Maybe then it’d be difficult.”

Scootaloo scoffed, smiling lightly. “Such a player. Surprised I managed to get in your pants then.”

“Thing about me is, even though I appear very picky, I like all kinds of ponies. From the shapely to the buff, everypony’s just a different kind of sexy.” Tiara winked at her, reaching down and patting Scootaloo on the thigh. “Even your friend who just walked out...”

“Want me to chase after her and beg?”

“Well, hot as that may be, I don’t really want you running out there in the nude. And besides...” Diamond Tiara smiled, leaning over and kissing Scootaloo on the cheek. “...you’ve got a perfectly good thing right here with you.” She raised her hand, intent on stroking Scootaloo’s spikes, but then she notices some drops of chocolate ice cream had found their way onto her fingers. “Oh.”

Scootaloo immediately took ahold of Diamond Tiara’s hand. She licked her lips and wrapped them around her long and smooth central digit, and furiously suckled on it like a straw.

“What are you…” Diamond Tiara was apprehensive, but as she watched a desperate demeanor creep into Scootaloo’s snide expression, she heart started to flutter all over again. She even felt a little aroused by such a depraved affection. “Oooh, keep doing that.”

Scootaloo removed her mouth from Diamond Tiara’s finger, then lapped at her hand, as well as the chasms between her fingers. She then quickly returned to sucking down whatever ice cream was left, taking in her index finger, middle finger, and ring finger all at once. Diamond Tiara’s turquoise-embedded silver ring wasn’t even an obstacle.

After swirling her tongue especially strongly along Diamond Tiara’s fingers, she pulled away again. “Couldn’t resist,” she said. A strand of saliva still connected her to the silver ring.

“Uh…” Diamond Tiara was at a loss, for words or otherwise. She could only really trust her body to know what to do, which was to reach out and grab ahold of a vanilla ice cream cup, and hand it to Scootaloo. “Go for it?”

Scootaloo blushed intensely as she realized her fantasy was about about to come to light. The only problem was that one of her hands was occupied holding the very catalyst for that fantasy. “Di, couldja turn around, please?” she asked.

“Okay.” Diamond Tiara crawled out of the covers and turned, allowing her back to face Scootaloo. “Now what?”

Scootaloo reached out to Diamond Tiara’s bra strap. With a single upwards swish of her finger, the bra’s hooks came undone. “Woah.” Diamond Tiara clasped her hands to her bra before it could fall down her chest. “Hey now—”

Scootaloo then seized Diamond Tiara around her stomach and pulled, forcing her to lie down. Scootaloo sat on her stomach and ripped the bra away from her, dropping it out of her reach. “You’re the bowl now.”

Diamond Tiara scrunched up her muzzle. “Excuse me?”

Scootaloo grabbed the spoon and tapped Diamond Tiara’s hands. They moved away, revealing a picture perfect set of buoyant mammaries. They jiggled as Diamond Tiara’s hands abandoned them, leaving them exposed for Scootaloo to enjoy, and did she ever plan on enjoying them. She scooped every last bit of ice cream out of the cup with a single pass of the spoon and dropped it right onto Diamond Tiara. The cold, sweet mass of sugar and vanilla settled into her cleavage, already beginning to melt.

“Scoots, that’s cold as shit!” Diamond Tiara griped. Her complaints were quickly silenced as she felt Scootaloo’s tongue touch one of her cold, ice-dream dressed breasts. It was an alien sensation, the rough, warm tongue on such a cold, dripping glaze that was gradually covering her chest. “S-Still cold... but, yeah, that feels better...”

Diamond Tiara shivered as Scootaloo licked away, mewling as she dove deeper and deeper between those two delicious mounds. She closed her eyes and just lett her cheeks, muzzle and tongue lead her along. The sugary cream stuck to her lips and nose as she sniffed and nuzzled around, licking whenever she hit a wet spot, ears twitching with every moan coming from Tiara.

I’m a dessert platter for a celebrity. This should be every girl’s dream, and— The thought derailed when Scootaloo’s tongue passed over her taut nipple, making her emit a shaky gasp. The rough brush of her tongue sent a shiver through her. She reached up and stroked Scootaloo’s mane, biting her lip as she watched the thirsty mare lick and grope away at her breasts, cleaning up the white fluid.

Diamond Tiara went through with what she wanted to do in the first place and stroked Scootaloo’s mane. “Y’know, it sucks that you’re gay, because you could service a stallion something fierce.”

Scootaloo just giggled, raising her head slightly and licking the ice cream from her lips. “Not happening. All the dicks in the world don’t get me as moist as a little coo from you.” She leaned back down and nibbled on one of Tiara’s nipples, pinching the other between her fingers to get another squeak out of Diamond Tiara. “Alright... dessert’s all done.” She looked up at Diamond and smiled, furrowing her brow lightly. “Spread ‘em.”

“Scissor?” Diamond Tiara asked with a squeak in her voice. “Are we gonna—”

“Spread ‘em.” Scootaloo reached down and grabbed her recitant bedfellow’s thighs. She parted them just enough for her moistened panties to snag. “Dammit, why are you still wearing that useless thing?”

“Somepony forgot to take them off along with my bra?” Diamond Tiara grinned, raising her brow slightly before slipping her hands down to the hem of her panties. “Here, allow me.”

With a quick pull of her legs, she brought them together and up over her body, pulling her panties up slowly. The fabric slid across her ass, gliding gently upwards towards her thighs, to the knees, and with one smooth motion, up over her hooves and to the head of the bed with a toss. Diamond spread her legs slowly, tracing her fingers along her inner thighs, before they finally met at her soaked entrance. “There... all better?”

Scootaloo put her left leg over Diamond Tiara’s right leg, and let her put her left leg over her right. Their moistened slits lined up perfectly. “Oh boy,” Scootaloo muttered. “This is gonna be fun.” She dug her fingers into the blankets and thrusted her hips forward, colliding against Diamond Tiara, who held onto Scootaloo’s hips for support. She was able to meet the thrust and grind up against her, and with that single grind the long buildup she had been suffering turned into ecstasy.

Diamond grunted with the impact, biting her lip as her clit slammed into Scootaloo’s. The shock rushed up her spine and forced her hips forward, mashing her slit against her lover’s, squeezing her fingers harder on perfect orange hips. “H-Holy… Mmm, that’s nice...” She groaned as she felt Scootaloo’s soaking wet heat pressed up against hers, grinding so slowly it drove her mad. “F-Faster, damn you!” Her fingers dug into Scootaloo’s strong hips as she leaned in enough to press their breasts together. Her panting breaths mingled with those of her lover as she drove herself harder against her delicious slit.

The hot, panting mess in front of Scootaloo was several degrees of separation from the haughty damsel that she had gotten to know so well. Sweat riddling her marble-carved body, just enough strands of hair out of place to make her seem unkempt, eyes bulging, tongue hanging out. It was a magical portrait of regality turning into raunch. What made it particularly beautiful to Scootaloo was that it was she alone who brought it out of the pompous mare. A lady no more, at least for the moment, Diamond Tiara was desperately and unhesitantly thrusting and pressing against Scootaloo’s vagina. And here I thought she wouldn’t be able to keep up, she thought.

Diamond Tiara tucked her muzzle under Scootaloo’s chin and kissed along her neck, grinding up against that sturdy wall of muscle and soft hair as she desperately drove herself towards a well-earned orgasm. One her hands quickly went up behind Scootaloo’s back, fingers scratching down along her spine as she licked and kissed along her, huffing and panting as she thrusted away.

Scootaloo wasn’t even moving much, just grinning and making the odd hip movement while Diamond Tiara did all the work, though with all the stimulation her clit was getting from the model’s drenched slit, her vision was getting a bit foggy and her hips started making stronger and stronger thrusts in time with Diamond Tiara’s. She just managed to lean forward enough to grab one of Diamond Tiara’s ears between her teeth, eliciting a surprised yelp, before it fell into a moan of lust as she licked along the edge of her ear. “Get… Get a lotta practice before this, Di? Agh, shit!”

“Fffuck you, I’m… I’ve done this tons of— Mmm!” Diamond Tiara’s voice was lost to a clumsy, messy kiss from Scootaloo, although it was less of a kiss and more of a tongue being forced into her mouth. She accepted it with a hungry, wanting moan, finally able to control her own tongue. It met Scootaloo’s, prodding and swirling around it. She could taste the remnants of the vanilla ice cream. It took her all to keep playing with Scootaloo’s tongue while her hips kept mashing forward.

She felt pleasure rising in her gut, spreading outward, about to consume her entire being. This was the crescendo, and as much as she just wanted to stay like this all night, grinding soaked nethers with the hottest daredevil she could ever hope to fall in love with, she also yearned for the sweet moment of release and the shameful bliss that would follow.

“Come on, come on, Di…” Scootaloo hastily whispered in her ear, her voice an even blend of lusty and aggressive. “I’m gonna lose it, I know you’re gonna lose it, please cum, I want you to cum, fuckin’ cum with me, cum with me…”

Diamond just nodded and thrusted forward, yanking Scootaloo up against her in a mad kiss as she finally hit her limit, a powerful shudder racing through her as her body tensed up. Her hand pressed against the back of Scootaloo’s head, keeping them together as she calmed down from her sudden orgasm, tongue probing around inside her lover’s mouth as she melted from the blazing pleasure. “Mmmmm...” She mewled quietly, hips numb from all the work, though she wouldn’t be able to pull away anyways, feeling Scootaloo’s arms wrapped around her back and holding her just as firmly.

It took a while for the two to finally untangle enough to just flop down onto the bed, Scootaloo lying on top of Diamond, though they never stopped kissing each other. No words made it out of them, just constantly breaking and remaking their kiss, hands stroking and groping all over each other in a sticky mess of pure, unadulterated lust and passion, protected from the frigid cold air by their warm embrace and at least two blankets.

The melted ice cream was negligible.