If Mom and Dad Were Here...
If Mom and Dad Were Here...
Applejack couldn't stop smiling. Finally, it had happened. After what had seemed like an eternity spent waiting, of worrying, of trying harder than any other fillies in Equestria, the cutie mark crusaders had done it. Apple Bloom had done it. She'd discovered her gift; her special talent, and what a gift it was. Even AJ herself, one of the chosen guardians of the Elements of Harmony, felt a little dwarfed by her sister's destined vocation. It was one thing to understand one's own purpose in life, but to help others discover and understand theirs... that was one big hay bale of responsibility to be piled onto a young filly.
If there were any ponies who could shoulder such a challenge and support one another through it though, it would be Apple Bloom, Sweetie Belle and Scootaloo.
"AJ?"
Still beaming, Applejack looked away from the sun setting over the orchards of Sweet Apple Acres, and towards the source of the voice. The deep, mellow bass of her big brother.
"I'm here, Big Mac. But... why are you here? I didn't reckon anyone would be back from the party this early. It's not winding down so soon, is it?"
The stallion shook his head simply. As if on cue, there came a distant explosion from the direction of Ponyville, and a column of glittering confetti which launched some thirty feet up into the air.
"Nope."
With a smirk, Applejack realised how silly her question had been. She should have known better than to expect Pinkie Pie to let this triple cute-ceanera end a second before it had to. She'd keep on partying till the last crusader had fallen asleep on their feet, and because of the specialness of the occasion, most other ponies in town would probably let her.
"So, if the party's still going strong what bring's y'all out here? I told you and Granny Smith I'd take care of the evening chores so y'all could enjoy some quality time with Apple Bloom. And I did. It's all done and dusted. I hope you trust me enough not to need to check up on me and make sure I've done a good enough job."
Still without a word, McIntosh approached his sister. He settled down onto his haunches beside the mare, joining her in observing the sunset, and tilted his head to one side. Affectionately, his large skull came to rest ever so gently against the top of AJ's hat.
Not moving, neither pulling away nor responding to her brother's unsolicited tenderness, Applejack cocked a curious eyebrow in his direction.
"Y'all aren't gonna cry again, are you? Shucks, Big Mac, I know it's a big day and all, but you're turning into a bigger softie than Fluttershy."
The stallion chuckled, shaking his head slowly whilst keeping it in contact with that of his sister.
"Nope. I'm all cried out for now. I just came here to... well, to be honest, I came to see if you were okay, AJ."
A deeper, warmer smile crossed Applejack's face. She had such a caring, wonderful family.
"You know me, Big Mac. I cry on the inside. Believe me, when I saw those marks on Apple Bloom's flanks, I was as torn up as a chicken coop with a timber wolf inside. But happily so. I don't reckon I've ever been happier, matter of fact."
McIntosh nodded. He drew back, not far, just enough to look his sister in the eye.
"I know that. We all know that. But... AJ, you have to admit that what you did today, what you said to Apple Bloom, it's not something you normally like to talk about."
In an instant, the moment McIntosh mentioned what Applejack had said to her younger sister, the mare's whole demeanour changed. She slipped her hat off her head, setting it down upon the ground beside her and staring down at it, as though transfixed... or perhaps not daring to look anywhere else. The warm smile upon her face rapidly faded away, and was replaced instead by a look of solemn realisation. To McIntosh, even taking into account to their normally rather obvious size difference, Applejack seemed suddenly small and tense. Her voice, when finally it escaped her, was similarly small and restrained.
"Oh. That."
Applejack shrugged. She tried to force a smile as her gaze drifted away from her hat and back up to her brother, but it soon faltered. Her eyes fell south once more, and remained there.
"It was nothing. Just something that popped into my head when I saw Apple Bloom standing there looking all grown up."
Rolling his eyes slightly, McIntosh snorted. It wasn't difficult to tell when Applejack was lying. She wasn't very practised, nor very good at it.
"Like hay it was. AJ, that was the first time you've mentioned them for years. The first time you've said a word about mom and dad sinc-"
Before McIntosh could say another word, Applejack stamped one foreleg firmly into the earth. She glared at her brother with a sharp, warning snort of her own.
"And?"
Her voice was harsh. Intense and accusatory, as though the stallion's question was a deep invasion of her privacy. Despite Applejack's unnecessary hostility, however, her brother remained calm. His tone was every bit as measured and careful as Applejack's was not when he responded.
"And... I thought that maybe you might be feeling a bit weird. Bringing them up to Applebloom after so long without having wanted, or needed to, I thought you might want to talk about it."
The stallion turned his gaze away from Applejack, looking towards the horizon and the setting sun once more. His brow furrowed.
"I know it's not always easy to find the right words. Believe me, I do. But if there was ever a time to try... it's on a big day like this. A day that's been full of happiness and celebration so far. Right?"
Applejack stood silent; grim and thoughtful for a few moments. Then, abruptly...
"Nope."
McIntosh's frown deepened.
"Really? That's all you have to say? Nope?"
The mare turned her head, glaring at her brother directly and grinding one hoof into the ground once more as she purposefully spoke a single word.
"Eeyup."
Undaunted by her uncharacteristic hostility, McIntosh glared back.
"Well then, if you won't talk? Maybe I will. Celestia knows one of us has to before you say anything else you're gonna be embarrassed as hay about later."
Closing his eyes and drawing a deep breath, the stallion opened his heart to his sister. It was never easy for him to do so, not even to those he loved the most. But under the circumstances, he had little choice but to at least try to get through Applejack's apparent frustration.
"I'll always remember how mom used to fuss over Apple Bloom when she was barely a yearling. How worried she used to get, and how dad would always tell her that she didn't need to worry. Because Apple Bloom would always be surrounded by ponis who loved her. Her brother and sister. Her grandparents. Her friends. That she would grow up into-..."
Macintish fell briefly silent as AJ rose onto all fours and shook her head. She grabbed her hat and forced it back on, pulling it down over her eyes as she turned back towards the farmyard.
"I don't have to stand here and listen to this..."
Before she could take more than a single step away from her brother though, Applejack felt the stallion's forelegs grasping at her tail. Grabbing her and tugging sharply, dragging her back into such close proximity that he could release her tail and fling his legs around her neck instead; hugging her as he held her forcefully captive.
"Yes you do. Now quiet down and listen. Dad always said that Apple Bloom would grow up into a mare every bit as strong as her big brother, and every bit as determined and beautiful as her big sister. They never had any doubt about any one of us. That we were gonna grow up and do them proud. Silly foal's stuff aside, we couldn't have disappointed them if we'd tried."
Applejack was still struggling. Grunting. Huffing. Fighting to be free and to escape McIntosh's honest words about their parents. But try as she might, he kept on holding her. Hugging her. And, hard as it may have been for both of them, he kept on talking.
"Remember your first Applebuck season? How you'd kick off with your hind legs so hard that you'd flip yourself over, and how mom and dad were laughing so hard that it too them an hour to show you the right way to do it? That's still one of my favourite memories of them. Laughing, looking at us with such love. They may not be here any more, but I still think that we were really lucky to have the time with them that we did. Apple Bloom never really got a chance to know them as anything more than a baby. To truly appreciate what good parents they were."
Tears were shining in the stallion's eyes by the time he fell silent. Indeed, he had been so caught up in what he was saying that it was only then McIntosh noticed that Applejack was no longer struggling within his embrace. That instead she was hanging almost completely limp, pressing up against him. The only real motion she was still making was to tremble, to shake against her brother's strong body.
With one hoof, McIntosh tipped his sister's hat back, and looked into her face where he could feel it pressed against his chest. He gazed down, and his heart broke at the distraught, tearstained, sorrowfully quaking features that awaited him.
Their eyes met, and one last time Applejack shook her head in a hopeless attempt to deny the feelings that she was now completely failing to contain. She let slip a mournful whimper.
"Did you hear? When I told her that they'd be proud of her? She was touched, but... to her, mom and dad are just a collection of stories and pictures and old heirlooms. Not like Granny Smith, or you and me. When we tell her we're proud, or that we love her, you can see how much it means to Apple Bloom. But, mom and dad, to her their pride only means as much as we tell her it does."
Applejack's bottom lip trembled. Fresh tears filled her eyes, and a moment later she was wrapping herself around McIntosh for comfort, sobbing openly.
"I miss them so much, Mac. Sometimes... I wish I could be like Apple Bloom. That I didn't remember them nearly as well or as much as I do. That having you, and Apple Bloom, and Granny Smith and all our other family and friends would be enough. But knowing how much they loved us, and how much we loved them. Knowing that we'll never, ever see them again..."
Her tears overwhelmed her words. She wept, and McIntosh wept with her. They cried for themselves, for each other, and they cried for Apple Bloom too. For the tears she would never shed. For the depth of sorrow she would never know, having lost her parents before she could truly learn who they were.
They cried together until they had no tears left to shed. Only then did they leave one another's tight embrace, but for a while longer sat together, side by side in silence upon the hill. They looked out over the bountiful greenery of Sweet Apple Acres in one direction, and the homes of Ponyville in the other. Looking first to the legacy their parents had entrusted to them, and then towards the town where they had made so many of their own cherished memories, their eyes widened as a fresh eruption of intermingled confetti and fireworks lit up the darkening sky.
Those explosions of shining light and colour marked the location of their other legacy. Not only their parent's crowning achievement in life... but perhaps their own, too.
"Big Mac?"
The stallion didn't stop looking at the fireworks.
"Eeyup?"
Applejack didn't stop looking either. But though her eyes may have been trained upon the sky, her heart was firmly rooted with the members of her family that she loved so dearly.
"I know what I said earlier, but... Apple Bloom does know that we're proud of her too, right?"
McIntosh opened his mouth to answer shortly and simply. He closed it again however, and after a few seconds' thought bowed his head in a confident, solemn nod.
"I'm sure she does, AJ. But... how about we go tell her, anyway? Maybe enjoy a few more hours of the party. Have some fun. Laugh and smile a bit. I think we could use it."
The stallion fell silent. He spoke up again soon after though, placing one hoof upon his sister's shoulder and smiling as she turned to regard him once more.
"Oh... and, AJ?"
"Yeah, big brother?"
"I'm proud of you, too."
By Jeeves
