She's the Demon

by Shaud

Rating: teen
Tags: Sunset Shimmer, Main 6, Slice of Life, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, Human, Sad
Length: 2847

Almost a year after the 'incident' at the Fall Formal and people are still calling Sunset an 'ex-she-demon.' Something about that, beyond the obvious, is bothering her, though... Something new and terrifying.

[Please read notes at the bottom before reading]

It had been almost a year after Sunset's fall at the Fall Formal, and most everyone had moved on. Sunset simmered down, as did the tension at Canterlot High.

However, sometimes an odd joke about her old self will pop up. And lately she's discovered a whole new reason to hate the term "she-demon."

[Slight AU; Fall Formal happened after two years not 3.5, so EG would have been junior year, and this takes place in senior year. Also: Transgender themes and 'special snowflake' things ahead. If you don't like these then, please, just don't read this.]

Published 2015-10-19 06:00:02 UTC
Last updated 2016-02-27 19:05:14 UTC

Noah Fence

Author's Note

I'm working on my other stories too I swear.

Also yes this is gonna be "quick" and "could use buildup" but honestly who wants that? Let's just get down to the nitty-gritty tbh.

Noah Fence

Sunset's happiest moments, she found, were when she was with her friends. A year ago she would have scoffed at the mere idea of having friends at all.

A lot of things had changed in that year, though. She had changed, Canterlot High had changed. Sometimes it seemed to her like the world started spinning just a bit faster the year before, and had yet to slow back down. As senior year started she couldn't help but wish for things to slow down again. For once, just her and her friends. No monsters, or rival schools, or anything like that.

Sunset smiled to herself as Pinkie and Rainbow playfully fought over the last cookie in front of her. Pinkie's kitchen had turned into a mess, but the girls scattered about it smiled and laughed all the same. When Rainbow ate the last cookie in front of her friend, Sunset pushed her own cooking over to Pinkie in sacrifice.

Said party girl cheered, and Sunset chuckled. A happy Pinkie was the best kind of Pinkie, and Sunset would give up a million cookies to make her happy.

The conversation around her shifted topics, though she hadn't been paying attention before. She listened intently as Rarity leaked the latest bits of gossip, anything from Lyra talking about proposing to Bon-Bon (they were soul mates, obviously, but Sunset questioned marrying in high school) to the sirens trying out for the soccer team.

"Sonata should be a cheerleader. Lotsa energy in that one." Rainbow rolled her eyes with a smile. While the sirens weren't necessarily redeemed like Sunset had been, the school tolerated them, at least.

"Aria's pretty good, though." Applejack pointed out. "Lotta anger to get out. Her kicks hurt." The comment sounded like it came from experience, and Sunset laughed at the thought. At Applejack's look she decided not to ask.

"Adagio just scares everyone off the field." Pinkie giggled, "Which could come in handy sometimes, I guess!"

They all shared a laugh at that.

"Hey Sunset," Rainbow grinned slyly at Sunset, a sure sign she was about to say something she would regret, "You should be our mascot."

Sunset snorted and glared at Rainbow. "What the heck does that mean?"

Rainbow's smile grew even more. "Just, you know, having an actual demon cheer us on would be awesome! You wouldn't even need to rent a costume!"

Sunset sneered, "Wonderful idea as always, Rainbow." Said girl laughed at her own joke, while the others rolled their eyes and prepared themselves for whatever Sunset would do to retaliate.

"Turn into a she-demon once and they never forget!" Pinkie meant it as a joke, but Sunset winced a bit anyways.

Rainbow rolled her eyes, her grin still on her face. "Aw, come on Sunset, not still upset about that, are ya? I mean, no offense, right?"

"...What, about turning into a demon? No, not at all. Nothing offensive about that." The sarcasm was evident to all but Pinkie, who giggled.

"Good! Because that was weird! I mean not everyone gets to turn into a she-demon but really it's just--mfmrmfrh!" Pinkie muttered something into Applejack's hand, which had been slapped over her mouth.

"We get it, Sugar Cube." Applejack said with a sympathetic wince in Sunset's direction.

"Indeed." Rarity said in a flat tone, "No need to rub it in, dear."

Pinkie smiled shyly and glanced at Sunset. "Sorry."

"No big deal." Sunset smiled at her friend. She knew the others had a hard time not picking at her for it, and she couldn't blame them. They deserved giving her a little payback, and she knew their humor mostly came from fear. Fear that she would turn again. Which, after the Anon-a-Miss thing concerned her, but she had faith in them.

"I think Sonata could pull off mascot, though." Rainbow mused, and Sunset resister the urge to facepalm. It seemed the other girl hadn't payed attention at all.

"Oooh that would be cool!" Pinkie grinned, "Maybe we could double team and both be mascots!"

Applejack smiled, "Maybe burn some energy outta both of ya, huh?"

"As if! I've got tons of energy!"

Sunset zoned out again at that point, and the previous conversation haunted her mind.

She-demon.

A year was a long time to get over things. And Sunset had, mostly, moved on from the incident the fall before. But something about she-demon continued to bother her. Something that she couldn't quite place.

For a while it had just been the guilt; of course mentioning the time she almost overtook another dimension with an army of teenagers but failed filled her with guilt and shame. But that feeling soon faded. Not completely, but a majority of the way.

Which left another feeling in it's place. It was similar to shame, but it also had a level of disgust with it. But it wasn't disgust at her past (though she felt that too) and instead was disgust at... The term itself.

Which was weird, because even she used the term to describe what had happen sometimes. But hearing it from others made her itch, and made her uncomfortable. Her skin crawled whenever one of her friends even jokingly said it.

She sighed without realizing it, and was surprised when Fluttershy put a hand softly on her shoulder.

"You okay?" Shy asked gently, "You've been kind of distant..."

"I'm fine." Sunset smiled. "Just a bit... tired, I guess." Of course Shy knew it was more than that; she was observant, and no wonder since she was the quietest of the group. She often noticed little things about the others that they themselves failed to notice.

At her sad look, Sunset was tempted to open up to her with the problem.

"Do she-demons dream of eating sheep?" Rainbow popped up on the other side of the counter, which made Shy squeak and jump back.

Sunset glared at the other girl, finally at her breaking point. "Stop. Calling. Me. That." Every word was painfully punctuated with anger, and even Rainbow had to step back.

"Gosh, it's just a joke." Rainbow said defensively, "You know we don't think you're actually a demon."

"Then why do you keep calling me that?"

"Yeah, RD." Applejack cut in. She hoped to keep Sunset and Rainbow from starting (another) fight. "Leave Sunset alone. She's been through--"

"Ugh, stop!" Sunset slapped a hand over her mouth as she realized what she said, and who she had said it to. "I-I'm sorry, Applejack, th-that wasn't, I don't-"

I yelled at my friend. Sunset's heart pounded and her vision blurred as she realized she had gotten angry at the friend that was trying to defend her. She sniffled and brought both of her hands to her mouth in an attempt to keep herself from speaking any more.

"H-hey, it's okay." Applejack's eyes widened in surprise and concern at the sight of her friend tearing up. She glanced at the others, but they all seemed equally confused.

Except for Pinkie.

"Sunset?" Pinkie spun Sunset gently on the stool she was on, and faced her friend head on. Sunset looked up with big, sad eyes that began to zone out, and Pinkie grabbed Sunset's hands in hers. "Hey, hey Sunset! It's okay! Whatever Applejack did, she didn't mean! And Rainbow's awfully sorry."

"I-I did-didn't mean to--I don't like--" Sunset cringed and her tears finally fell. A wave of guilt washed over her, and she hung her head.

"It's okay, Sunny! It'll be alright." Pinkie promised as she pulled Sunset in for a hug. "What bothered you, though? If we don't know, we can't stop doing it, you know?"

What had Applejack done? Sunset was unsure. She knew what Rainbow had done, but Applejack had only tried to defend her.

"Ah told Rainbow to leave ya alone..." Applejack didn't know what she had said wrong, but she felt really bad about it. "Ah was gonna say ya've been through enough."

None of that stuck out at Sunset. But she could still feel the anger and disgust that came with hearing what Applejack had said. What had it been, though, was all she could wonder.

"Sunset said she wanted me to--there!" Rainbow stopped and pointed as Sunset cringed again.

"Whatever is the matter, Darling?" Rarity walked over to Sunset's side, but Sunset buried her face in Pinkie's shoulder.

It was quiet for a minute before Fluttershy whispered, "She?"

Sunset swallowed hard. That was it. She. But why did that feel so wrong? "I... I think..." Sunset muttered, her voice still broken due to her emotions.

Her grip on Pinkie tightened, and Pinkie hugged her tighter. "Why does that bother you? Because it makes you think of she-demon? Or--ooh! Ohh! Do you not like she-demon because it has she in it? It's like a chicken or the road thing!"

"Chicken or the egg." Rarity corrected, "And I don't know if that's right, Pinkie."

"But why would 'she' bother her?" Rainbow raised a brow, "I mean, the demon part yeah, but she's a girl, so that just doesn't make sense."

"Unless she isn't a girl!" Pinkie yelled, which made Sunset yelp for several reasons. One because Pinkie jumped away and almost made Sunset face-plant, and another because the idea that she wasn't a girl scared her. Because if she wasn't a girl, what was she? Not a boy, at least.

Sunset glared at Pinkie the best she could through her tears, and Pinkie grinned apologetically.

"Is that why, Sunset? Cause you aren't a girl?"

"Pinkie, what the hell." Sunset growled, immediately defensive.

"Come on, let's all be honest here." Applejack said sternly, "We need ta get to the bottom of this, whatever it may be. So if it's not a gender problem, what is it?"

Sunset stared at Applejack while she thought. Is... Is it a gender problem? Sunset swallowed and wiped at her eyes. I've never thought about it before. But she-demon... No, just 'she' bothers me. She, her, herself. Eck, no. I don't like that. But why is this just happening now?

Sunset thought back to the previous times she had been called 'she-demon' and wondered if it had bothered her then, too. She had always assumed being called a demon was what made her uncomfortable, and that did, too. But at the same time, something else seemed to be there.

She tried to think of all the times someone used 'she' or 'her' around her. Usually her friends just called her 'Sunset' or 'Sunny,' something she was suddenly grateful for. But all of the other times stuck out in her mind, and she realized she hated her pronouns.

But if she hated her pronouns, what did that mean?

The silence grew long and awkward, and she wiped her face again. She took a deep, steady breath.

"I don't know." The others sighed or groaned in response, but she continued, "I don't know yet. I... I've never thought about this before." She looked up to Applejack. "I'm sorry. For snapping."

"Naw, it's fine." Applejack gave her a warm smile. "We've given ya a hard time about the... Demon thing." Applejack graciously dropped the problematic pronoun, and Sunset relaxed a bit.

"And when you do figure it out, you better tell us. I don't want to hurt your feelings." Rainbow paused for a beat. "On accident. On purpose is much more fun!"

Sunset scowled, but it soon turned into a smile. "Yeah, yeah, whatever."

"So..." Everyone jumped as Maud spoke (how long she had been in the corner no one knew) "You guys are going to clean this up, right?"

A chorus of teenagers muttering agreement responded, and she nodded before she walked out of the room.

"Pinkie, your sister's kinda..." Rarity paused as she searched for the word.

"Amazing?"

"Um... Yes."

"And I was like, 'No offense, but I'm pretty sure that's illegal' and she got all offended!" Rainbow laughed.

"Isn't hat the name of someone in our homeroom? Noah Fence?"

"Um, I don't think so."

"Ooh, Sunset would know!"

"Let's leave he-Sunset out of this one."

Sunset blinked in surprise. Rainbow was the last one she would expect to ask to leave her out of a conversation, and the fact that she used Sunset's name instead of pronouns made Sunset feel... Happy, almost. No, definitely happy.

The hours since the meltdown in the kitchen had been long and tense, but they finally all began to talk normally again. The awkward air made Sunset uncomfortable and stressed, but she knew she needed her friends then more than ever.

Sunset sighed and rubbed her eyes as she leaned against the counter. She still didn't know for sure if the problem earlier had been a gender related on, but she thought it was. The only real problem was that she didn't seem to like being thought of as a boy or girl.

Maybe I'm neither? The idea confused her, but it made sense. But then... Pronouns. Oh, my head... She sighed.

"Are you okay?" Sunset jumped at the small voice behind her and spun around quickly.

"Fluttershy! Ah, you scared me!"

"Oh, I'm so sorry! You just looked unhappy and, um." She smiled sheepishly, "Sorry."

Sunset chuckled and relaxed again. "You're fine. I was just about to come up."

"Good. It's not the same without you around." Her smile was big and sincere, and Sunset blushed.

"Ah, thanks, I guess?"

"Mhm. And I might not be the best to talk to, but, I do know some things. Pinkie does too, but she can be a bit much."

Sunset blinked at the offer. "S-some things?"

Fluttershy smiled. "Mhm. Pronouns, genders, stuff like that. There's more than boy and girl, I could teach you about it some time. If you wanted, of course!"

Sunset froze. So there really are... Other things.

"I... I'd like that. Thank's, Shy."

"Anytime. Now, let's get back upstairs before something else explodes..."

Sunset laughed at Fluttershy's concerned face, but soon realized she was serious. "Uh, yeah, good idea."

Sunset let out an uneasy breath as she climbed the stairs to Pinkie's room. Her fear of loosing her friends had been one of the things that put her on edge, and she shook slightly as she slowly approached Pinkie's bedroom.

Fluttershy hugged her from the side suddenly, and whispered "We're here for you, Sunset. No matter what, we're your friends."

Sunset's eyes widened, and she hugged Fluttershy back. She closed her eyes and smiled.

"Thanks, Shy."

They walked into the room, and the pleasant atmosphere had returned. Sunset sighed in relief.

Once again she was happy and comfortable in the company of her friends.

Addendum

Author's Note

Eh. I felt it needed something.

Addendum

Hours later, in the dark of Pinkie's room, Sunset stared up at the ceiling in silence. The girls around her had all just laid down, and she knew within moments all would be asleep.

For hours Fluttershy had helped her quietly Google and talk about the different words for genders. Sunset felt tears in her eyes more than once in the whole situation, and Fluttershy kept a comforting arm around her shoulders. The others kept the conversation light with other topics but it was no secret that they were all thinking about the situation.

It seemed odd, to most, to consider that Sunset wasn't a girl. Or probably wasn't, anyways. Their feelings were conflicted, and not entirely supportive of the idea, but they were friends. They trusted Sunset, and were sure that, eventually, everything would work out.

Sunset herself felt the most doubt. Doubting her gender was something she had never done, never even considered. It scared her, almost hurt her, to be in the situation where not only was she questioning, but her friends knew she was. It was embarrassing, and she felt shame and guilt well in her. She didn't want her friends to know on the one hand, but on the other it was because of Pinkie and Fluttershy that she was able to learn about herself at all.

Sunset was still wide awake with thoughts of earlier in her head. Her friends loved her, and supported her. They had proven this time and time again (though, admittedly, there had been a bump or two in the road).

It was because of this that she managed to sigh, breath in deeply, and whisper;

"I'm not a girl."

The resulting shuffle of blankets and bodies was almost immediate as her friends huddled around her, all of them showing their support in their own way. Hands on her shoulders, heads buried in her side or hair. They were there. That was what mattered. Despite doubt, with certainty, her friends were with her.

They fell asleep like that, but if you ask Rainbow if she ever cuddled up to Sunset in the middle of the night she will firmly deny it.