Hero That Will Never Be (Edited)
Author's Note
Will add a note later to explain this short story, sorry. The next chapter is not part of the story but the reason I wrote it, I am hoping it touches some hearts and let some of my main readers get into my head a little. The older I am getting the more I think about my life and how much I have failed and that I can't fix. Thank you for reading this...
Hero That Will Never Be (Edited)
The forest went dead silent as the roars and screams stopped. Nothing dared take a single breath as I neared the strong smell of iron. The day light slowly fading as the darkness of night took over the already dark forest. I was patrolling the edges of a small town two hundred miles east of the old castle. The silent mad laughter broke into my ears as I picked up my pace, I could smell three large dead creatures and one close to joining them. Sprinting full force past the dark magic of the trees I busted into a large clearing with one dead dragon and a VERY much smaller creature lightly breathing. Its laughter turned into sobs as it cursed the world for its life. How it dishonored its mother by dying, its father by not making his word on being a good son and brother, for letting him down by not going on in life and bringing more of his name and making him a figure of failure. It spoke of its sister and how it's sorry for not being there to watch her grow up like he swore. It- no HE was sorry for letting his life take him the way it did and not going on to make his family happy by living a long happy life.
"Sir?" I asked getting it to sob louder.
"I am no hero as for much as I care. People may praise me for being one, but in my eyes and heart, I just saved my squad so they can be what I couldn't." He was a laying on his back looking to the sky with his ice blue eyes filled with anger.
"What do you mean?" Asking another question to him.
"What do you-" He coughed up blood. "see a hero as?" His voice didn't sound weak but I knew he wouldn't last long enough for a doctor to get here for him.
"A pony that saved lives, one that put others before itself, one that made a great choice." Walking up next to it showing it was taller than Celestia.
"That is your view," I looked deep into my eyes, its face was black, green and red. "My view of a hero is that of it matters only that it is seen as one by those that only matter. I failed, to you I would be a hero, to them, I'm a let down." His eyes revealed sorrow as blood seeped from his mouth and nose. "Who would it matter for you to see you as a hero?" Sitting next to him and brushing back his golden mane from his face I spoke softly.
"My sister and mother." I felt pain that I could not help him one bit.
"Same, but to them I don't care, my father can't view my as a hero or a Ranger. So I'm just a soldier that died saving his small squad. I don't care as how you see me, my only look on my ending breath is that I will have to fight even more in the afterlife." Tilting my head in thought he continued. "I failed what my father taught me, and hoped I would never do. I died for the Army and my family's freedom only to let him down. They raised me only to dishonor what I should have done."
"I don't understand." I can feel tears working their way to my eyes.
"I died as a hero in the public eye, but to my family, I paid them in gilt and sorrow. I failed the one mission I never seen till I was over in war. To pass my father's teachings on to my own kids, to teach them how to live and to never feel they failed me or anyone else. I failed those who I wished to never fail. So being a hero doesn't matter to me any more." His words was deep and hit me in every way I wish they wouldn't.
"I, I understand some what." The tears freely flowing from my eyes as he coughed more blood up. "Being a hero doesn't matter as long as you feel that you deserve the title." He smiled, something I never thought I would see in the eyes of death.
"A hero is only what you make of yourself. You are a hero, but you wasn't born one. I can tell you are military, they made you a hero, not birth."
"I-" I started to cry.
"I wasn't born or raised to be a hero, and still ain't one. I failed my own mission, I wanted to be a hero listening to a song and training before my military career. The song spoke of a war, two men out of 30 was all that lived. He watch as others died around him but refused to give up. I wanted to be the one that never let his brothers and sisters in arms down. I knew what I signed up for, to live with what I seen and did. All I wanted to do was bring honor to my family name and make my family proud. Being a hero never mattered to me." Gasping and coughing up more blood he gave me a sad smile. "I think I may have gave my family pride to be under my name, but I still am no hero. I haven't given myself the right to be called one. You have to give yourself the right, not others. I have faith that you can make your own mind up to gain the right."
"What is your name? At least give me the right to call you one." His smile grew sadder.
"A hero doesn't need a name to be called a hero as long as the one telling them that they are one, I guess that is as close as I'll ever feel to being one." He looked upon the bright stars in the night sky.
"You ARE a hero, please take that thought as you go." His smile was only getting sadder as the life in his eyes slowly started to fade. His smile never leaving his lips. "You ended a threat to the kingdom, you are a hero to me and the ponies that hear my words about your victory over the nightmare we lived with for over a year. Thank you Hero."
Author's Note
Please read this, it might open your eyes and might change your look on life. Please give this chapter a chance...
Why I Wrote This
The whole reason behind this is the way I feel. I can never see myself as a true hero or even honorable in the right eyes. I know I'm slowly bring honor back to my fathers name but it all doesn't matter to me. Don't get me wrong I love my mother and sister, but the true person that mattered in my life is long and gone. I will keep on the path that I made myself through the swampy hell I call my life. Its said if you run in to a Y in the road go the path less ran. I shoved the sign over and used it to clear my path.
'Being a hero is not what you did, but rather making a split second choice and giving something up to do so...' My father taught me that and I have yet to do so. Till that moment comes I shall slowly bring back honor and pride to the family name. I seek to restore what was a honorable military name and I'll have my chance soon. Till than I shall right wrongs and create more problems than I should ever have. See you can change the past but you can alter the future. My past is a dark one and y'all can call bull if you may.
Never judge a book by its cover, for it may be your own. Live and let live, smile and be joyous of the days you have to come. For them may bring their own battles, but not ever war is won by a single day. It will bare fruits of your labor... May not see it till later in life but for now know life will always have its silver lining. Look to the sky and that is what you are worth. Everything but in the same idea nothing. You have to truly think about it as is the glass half empty or half full. For those who take this as they are nothing the air around you is what keeps you living. In means you make people live another day. Nitrogen, oxygen, and trace gasses help you live to see another day. Now see the glass half full and know you can reach far past the starts. Know that you can make a change and make things right in this dark place we call life. Know that you help those who see life as a half empty glass. You are what makes the glass truly full and no longer a fight.
Take my words as you wish, but know the glass is never empty, nor is it full. Rely on humanity to make the glass complete.
