Two Heads Are Better Than One?
(Gunbarrel Sequence)
Amidst the majesty of Princess Luna's night, a small train was making its way across the hills of Equestria, bound for the station in Manehattan, one of Equestria's busiest cities.
In one of the coaches near the front of the train, a brown coated earth pony stallion was looking nervously out the window, all the while sneaking an occasional glance at the suit case that rested beside him.
Suddenly, his eyes caught sight of a pink coated earth pony mare dressed in a conductor's outfit. The mare was walking up and down the isleways, punching tickets and performing the usual duties of a train conductor.
"Could she be the one sent to contact me?" the stallion thought to himself, as he tried to recall the secret pass phrase he was to recite to prove his legitimacy.
The conductor stopped next to the stallion, and briefly cleared her throat before asking "Is everything alright, sir?"
"Well, actually, could I trouble you for a lantern?" the stallion asked.
"I prefer flashlight." the conductor replied, digging into one of her coat pockets and pulling out what appeared to be a small flashlight.
"Much better." the stallion said with a smile.
The conductor pressed the button that would turn the flashlight on, but nothing happened "Until it goes bad." And the conductor stored the flashlight back in the same pocket she had pulled it out of earlier.
The stallion smiled, he knew now who he was talking to. "Ah, 001. A pleasure to meet you. My name is Filthy Rich." he said softly, while shaking the conductor's hoof.
"Delighted to meet you, Mr. Rich," the conductor pony replied softly "Luna has been expecting you for some time now. Please, follow my lead so we may discuss things in a more 'private' setting," And with that, the conductor pony said loudly "What do you mean you don't have your ticket with you, sir?!"
"I'm terribly sorry, I must've misplaced it at some point prior to gettin' on the train!" Filthy Rich replied loudly, and began to plead "Please, I'll pay you anythin', just don't kick me off!"
"I'll have to speak with the engineer and firepony," the conductor pony continued, grabbing Filthy Rich by the hoof "But you'll likely have to get off at the next station, and pay for a new ticket! Now, come with me!" And the conductor pony led Filthy Rich out of the passenger car.
When the two ponies reached the front of the train, the conductor pony approached the engineer and whispered something into his ear.
The engineer nodded, and after checking to make sure the coast was clear, he pulled a lever, and a hologram appeared that showed the engineer and firepony going about their usual duties.
"It pays to have friends in the right places," the conductor pony whispered, and quickly took off her conductor outfit, revealing herself to be in a black stealth suit with night vision goggles "The name's Pie, Pinkie Pie."
"So, what's this all about?" Filthy Rich asked Pinkie Pie "Why did Luna send you to meet here, instead of at the train station in Manehattan?"
"We're expecting an important passenger to board the train at the next station," Pinkie Pie explained "You've heard about the various security leaks that have been sweeping the nation lately, right?"
Filthy Rich nodded "You don't suspect I'm involved, do you?"
"We did at one point, but PI9 has been investigating, and we've found nothing," Pinkie Pie told Filthy Rich "Not to mention, you don't know any secrets on the level of importance that the leaked secrets are on. They're top secret, and they're putting our royal guards and special forces at risk!"
"So I've heard, but I still don't see what that has to do with me." Filthy Rich said with confusion.
"They say everypony has his price," Pinkie Pie told Filthy Rich "And your suitcase full of bits might be just the thing we need to get our suspect to talk. His name is Silver Streak, a high ranking officer within the royal guard. He's a pegasus who's name leaves little to interpretation." And she showed him a picture of a slver coated pegasus stallion with a wavy mane and tail consisting of two streaks of silver. His eyes were a deep black in color, and his cutie mark was a wind gust.
"You want me to see if I can bribe him in exchangin' secrets?" Filthy Rich asked.
"Not quite," Pinkie Pie said with a shake of her head "We don't expect him to start talking to just anyone, no matter how much money they carry. But if you can nudge the conversation into the topic of secrets and confidential information, Pi9 will take care of the rest." Pinkie Pie than dug into her utility belt, and pulled out what looked like a tiny spider.
"I see old T has had a lot of free time on his hooves," Filthy Rich smiled "I guess I'm suppose to attach this to my suitcase, correct?"
Pinkie Pie nodded "Make sure it's out of direct sight. I can activate it remotely and listen in on the conversations it records. Once we've gathered enough evidence, I'll grab him, and take him back to PI9 for questioning."
"Sounds like a plan, just make sure Silver Streak doesn't suspect I'm involved in this," Filthy Rich pleaded "I want to maintain a low profile in all of this, and I don't want to look like I was connected with a top secret agency. I have a reputation to keep up you know."
"Just put the T-Spider on your suitcase, and everything will be fine," Pinkie Pie reassured him, and changed back into her conductor's uniform "We'll be arriving in Manehattan shortly, make sure you've got everything in order. And don't forget to purchase a new ticket so ponies don't suspect anything." And with that, the hologram was dropped, and the two ponies went their seperate ways. But not before Filthy Rich successfully clipped the T-Spider to his suitcase.
Little did either of them suspect, they were being watched.
When the train stopped in Manehattan, Pinkie Pie watched from one of the windows in the first train car, as Filthy Rich met up with Silver Streak and began to strike up a conversation.
After activating the T-Spider's audio recorder and playback function with the press of a button, Pinkie Pie carefully made her way to the last car on the train. It was said to be a private car for important passengers, but that was only to keep the secret about what it contained from being found out.
For in reality, the last car was actually a mini mobile headquarters for PI9. It was set up specifically to allow 001 to contact Pi9 Headquarters back in Canterlot.
"Ah, 001, there are you," Bat Wings commented, as Pinkie Pie entered the car "I was beginning to think you'd gotten lost or something."
"I appreciate your concern, but we 00 agents have an impeccable sense of direction," Pinkie Pie replied "Is the line to Canterlot open?"
"Indeed it is. Better hurry, you know how impatient Luna can get." Bat Wings said seriously.
Pinkie Pie walked over to one of the pannels, and pressed a bright green button. A few seconds later, a magical screen appeared with Princess Luna's face on it. "Good evening, 001. Splendid to hear from you on time for once," Princess Luna greeted "Have you made contact with Filthy Rich?"
"I sure did, he and Silver Streak are chatting away as we speak," Pinkie Pie smiled "The conversation is just about to drift to what Silver Streak knows about the leaks."
"Good," Princess Luna smiled briefly, before regaining her serious composure "Please exercise extreme caution, 001. This could be the very break through we've been searching for after all these months of searching. This is hardly the time to get careless and let the trail go cold!"
"Relax, everything's in good hooves with me, I won't let you down!" Pinkie Pie promised.
"See that you don't," Princess Luna warned "I'll contact you through our usual methods if something comes up, and make sure to notify me if any complications arise. The fate of Equestria could be at stake here! Princess Luna, out."
"Sounds like Luna has an awful lot of trust in you." Bat Wings smiled.
"She sure does, because she knows I'm the best secret agent in all of Equestria," Pinkie Pie replied "Be ready to detach this car soon, I get the feeling Silver Streak is about to spill some very important beans." And with that, she exited the car, and climbed onto the roof.
Pinkie Pie carefully navigated from coach to coach, until she reached the one she knew Filthy Rich and Silver Streak were in. Once she was comfortable, she proceeded to pull out a pair of headphones, and carefully listened in on the conversation taking place below her.
"So, what do you know about the royal guard?" Filthy Rich asked Silver Streak "From what I've heard, you've got some very juicy information concernin' their weaknesses. Or are my bits and I mistaken?"
"Oh, you've heard right," Silver Streak replied "Get this, the royal guards will fall for any sort of reward you can give to them. They feel so unappreciated, that they left their posts for a chocolate cherry cake with buttercream frosting."
"That sounds good. Anythin' else?" Filthy Rich asked.
"Ooh, I'm glad you asked, because I've got something really good for you!" Silver Streak said eagerly "You know about that maximum security prison called Tartarus, right?"
"Yeah, everypony knows that's where the princesses imprison the most dangerous threats to Equestria that cannot be defeated or reformed." Filthy Rich replied.
"Well, have I got a story for you," Silver Streak chuckled somewhat fiendishly "Let's just say that I know somepony, who knows even more than I do, about the vulnerabilites of that so called maximum security prison. In fact, he knows so much that he'll practically give away the information to anyone who wants it, and can meet his asking price! You better hope your saddle bags are filled with gold, because I hear he's asking for a really high price!"
"So, Silver Streak is just a front for a bigger threat! I should've known!" Pinkie Pie thought to herself "Well, either way, I'd better bring him in for questioning."
But, just as Pinkie Pie had put away the headphones, and was preparing to use her grappling hook disguised as a pen to swoop down and grab Silver Streak, something caught her eye.
Standing just a train car across, was a cream colored earth pony mare with shades, a black vest, and a grappling hook of her own.
"Sorry," the mare said in a serious tone "But that stallion is coming with me!"
"No, he's coming with me!" Pinkie Pie insisted "PI9 has a lot to gain from questioning him!"
"So does C.A.K.E!" the mare replied.
"C.A.K.E?" Pinkie Pie asked.
"It's nothing that should concern an amateur like you!" the mare said seriously, and began to grapple down. Pinkie Pie did the same, and the two agents became locked into a battle to apprehend Silver Streak.
Silver Streak became reasonably paranoid, when the sound of breaking glass reached his ears, and two earth pony mares jumped in from different windows, both of them glaring fiercely at him.
"I'm out of here!" Silver Streak shouted, and began to run away. He wasn't about to let himself be captured.
"Just who are you, and what do you think you're doing?!" Pinkie Pie asked the mare, as the two tried to shove their way past each other.
"My name is Special Agent Sweetie Drops, and you are in my way!" Sweetie Drops declared "C.A.K.E has been on this case for far longer than PI9 has been!"
"I doubt that very much, Sweetie Drops!" Pinkie Pie replied, dropping a pellet of sleeping gas, and quickly rushing out of the car.
Pinkie Pie quickly closed the gap between her and Silver Streak, and with a fearsome tackle, she grabbed him and refused to let go. "This is 001, reporting in!" she said to Princess Luna "I've captured Silver Streak and am requesting immediate pickup! A rival agency is trying to get to Silver Streak as well!"
"What?! Are you sure?!" Princess Luna asked.
"I wish I was making this up, but it's real! I just barely gave their agent the slip!" Pinkie Pie explained, as she prepared her grappling hook.
"Just hold on and get to the car at the end of the train!" Princess Luna insisted "I'm sending an emergency notice to Bat Wings, he'll know what to do!"
Pinkie Pie held on tightly to Silver Streak, as her grappling hook managed to hook onto the roof of the coach right by the front of the train. She hopped from train car to train car, convinced that she'd given Sweetie Drops the slip.
But, just as the last car was in sight, Sweetie Drops suddenly appeared in Pinkie Pie's path "Give me Silver Streak right now, and nopony gets hurt!" she warned, shooting a flare into the air to emphasize her point.
Pinkie Pie gulped, and tried to think of a way to escape from her prediacment with Silver Streak safely in her clutches. Then, just when all hope seemed lost, an idea struck her. It was risky, but at this point, it was the best option she had.
"You want him so badly, take him!" Pinkie Pie shouted, throwing Silver Streak to Sweetie Drops with as much force as she could.
Sweetie Drops was suprised, and this gave Pinkie Pie just enough time to rush forward, tackle Sweetie Drops, snatch up Silver Streak, and leap to the last car. Said car then detached, as Pinkie Pie made her way inside it. And with a rocket booster that had previously been concealed beneath the wheels, the car rocketed away down the track, leaving Special Agent Sweetie Drops far behind.
"You'll pay for this, 001!" Sweetie Drops vowed "You haven't seen the last of me, or C.A.K.E!"
As the train car sped back to Canterlot with Silver Streak in tow, Pinkie Pie was thinking to herself "Who was that mysterious mare? And just who or what is C.A.K.E?"
(Title Sequence)
Once Silver Streak was safely in the custody of PI9, Princess Luna wasted no time in having him interrogated.
As for Pinkie Pie, she couldn't get the image of Special Agent Sweetie Drops out of her mind. Something about her seemed very familiar.
Asking around Pi9 yielded no results. No one knew anything about this so called spy, or this agency that she claimed to belong to.
At last, just when Pinkie Pie was convinced she was never going to get any sort of answers. She was called into Princess Luna's office, and she knew that could only mean one thing.
"Thank you for coming on such short notice, 001," Princess Luna said to Pinkie Pie "Please, have a seat. We have much to discuss."
Pinkie Pie sat down in a lavish red chair, facing Princess Luna, who was seated behind her desk.
Princess Luna pressed a button on her desk, and a small screen appeared on a nearby wall. "007 has completed interrogation of Silver Streak," Princess Luna explained, pointing to the image of the stallion being questioned "He was a tough case to crack, but we were able to pry this much out of him. He is working for a reclusive mare known as Sneaky Polomare."
"She wouldn't by any chance to be related to Suri Polomare of Manehattan, would she?" Pinkie Pie asked Princess Luna.
"I'm afraid she is, 001," Princess Luna said glumly "It would appear, that the apple does not fall far from the tree with the Polomare family. Sneaky is Suri's older sister, and runs a small security company in Manehattan. It fits the evidence that Sneaky, or someone working for her, has obtained top secret information. And is illegally selling it on the black market to make some fast money."
"Say no more, I'll see to it that the snitch pays!" Pinkie Pie vowed.
"Hold on a minute, 001!" Princess Luna insisted "Silver Streak also told us that the information he obtained about Tartarus, is going to be sold anyway. If this information gets out and falls into the wrong hooves, Equestria could be seeing a jail break the likes of which it has never experienced before! You need to not only track down and capture whoever is responsible for obtaining this top secret information, but also see to it that the information does not reach the ears of our enemies! The fate of Equestria could very well be at stake, so exercise extreme caution!"
"Relax, with me on the job, you've got nothing to worry about!" Pinkie Pie replied "Assuming that mysterious mare from the train doesn't show up again."
"Speaking of which, we've run a data base search on the mare's identity from the photos provided," Princess Luna told Pinkie Pie "All signs point to the mare actually going by the name of Bon Bon. Latest sightings claim that she has been living with Lyra Heartstrings, the same mare who almost compromised the safety of the Equestria Games. If that's true, it's possible that Lyra was just a front for a much bigger rival secret agency. But this is NOT a personal vendetta, so do not engage her unless you have no other choice."
"I'll keep that in mind." Pinkie Pie insisted, and she left Princess Luna's office, and headed for T's lab to get suited up.
It didn't take long for Pinkie Pie to reach T's lab, and sure enough, there was the old stallion himself. He was dressed in his usual lab coat, and seemed unusually excited.
"Why, 001, how unexpected," T greeted, before he frowned "I'm getting tired of saying this, but how hard is it to bring back my equipment in one piece?! After your latest adventure, that Parapsrite Camera is all but useless, and I worked really hard on it!"
"I'm really sorry, T. But accidents happen." Pinkie Pie said innocently.
"They seem to happen quite often with you around," T replied unhappily, before somewhat regaining his composure "Now, please follow me. And pay careful attention so that you know how to take care of what I'm going to give you."
Pinkie Pie followed T, and the two of them walked by a tray holding Pinkie Pie's miniature party cannon, and the T-Phone. "Both your party cannon, and your T-Phone have all the bells and whistles they carried last time, though I trust you'll use your grappling pen far more often than the grapple program. But this time, your party cannon can now carry flares for emergency situations. Please use them sparingly." T explained.
"I'll do my best, but when you're out in the field, you can't always make promises to keep things neat and tidy," Pinkie Pie replied. stuffing the T-Branch gadgets into her stealth suit pockets "Is that all you're going to give me, besides a ride to Manehattan?"
"Of course not, 001," T said with a shake of his head, pulling out a small metallic object "In order to replace your destroyed Parasprite Camera, I have fashioned this new one. It looks like a microscopic breezie, which is why it's called the Breezie Cam. In addition to the camera and laser, it also doubles as a powerful flash bang grenade. Press the blue button on its side, plant it on the ground, and make sure to adjust your night vision goggles accordingly. This flash should be powerful enough to stun anyone not wearing shades or goggles adjusted to the intensity of the light. You can control it remotely, just like your Parasprite Cam, and I hope you'll take better care of it."
Pinkie Pie stuffed the Breezie Cam away, taking great care not to accidentally trigger the flash grenade.
"There is one last item that Princess Luna insist I give you before you head off," T said seriously "But I must warn you, it's only a prototype, and we're still working out some of the bugs."
"What is it?" Pinkie Pie asked, as T led her through the lab, until he stopped in front of a window looking into a testing room.
A dark blue coated unicorn lab assistant with jet black hair loosely styled, and yellow eyes, was testing out what looked like a medium sized jetpack. And from the look of worry on his face as he flew all around the room, it was obvious that the jetpack was causing him trouble.
"It's called the T-Branch Jetpack, or the T-Jet for short," T explained seriously "It can be fueled by any sort of chemicals you may find laying around in containers, but make sure it's not too flammable or you might blow yourself to bits!"
"That's a rather grim picture, and one that I could do without." Pinkie Pie replied, questioning why Princess Luna would give her such a dangerous piece of equipment.
"It should be safe to use in short bursts, but I'd highly recommend using it only as a last ditch escape option if all else fails," T warned "Speaking of escape, I think it's about time I presented you with your mode of transportation."
T led Pinkie Pie to the lab's garage, the painted brick wall door rising up as they came near it. Resting on the loading ramp was what looked like a motorized scooter.
"001, this is your new T-Bike," T explained to Pinkie Pie "It contains the ability to be driven remotely with your T-Phone, and has a built in self destruct feature that can be activated if an unfriendly passenger attempts to ride it. Please try to avoid letting that happen, it took the lab boys and I months to get this thing built."
"Don't worry, T. When have I ever let you down?" Pinkie Pie asked, as she hopped onto the T-Bike, and sped off to Manehattan.
T just shook his head "Frequently, 001. And that's what worries me."
The ride to Manehattan passed uneventfully, although Pinkie Pie couldn't completely get the thoughts of Bon Bon a.k.a Special Agent Sweetie Drops out of her head.
"I knew her ever since I moved to Ponyville," Pinkie Pie thought to herself "At some point, I'm certain I would've sensed if she was a secret agent."
Pinkie Pie shook her head, she was thinking too much. For right now, she had a job to do, and she wasn't going to let anyone or anything distract her from doing said job.
Upon reaching Manehattan, it took very little time for Pinkie Pie to reach her destination. Sneaky Polomare worked at a thrift shop that had originally belonged to her sister, before she was busted for illegally stealing other ponies designs and claiming they as her own. Right now, Suri's exact whereabouts were unknown, but in the meantime, Sneaky was managing Manehattan Masterpieces, a rather lavish and expensive boutique that could even give Canterlot Carousel a run for its money.
After carefully parking the T-Bike out of sight behind the rich red brick walls, and making sure it was out of sight of weary eyes, Pinkie Pie began her approach.
Taking the grappling pen out of her pocket, Pinkie Pie carefully lined it up and fired it. The hook grabbed onto a small opening in one of the windows on the upper levels. and Pinkie Pie used it to pull herself up the side of the building. After all, she never was one for the direct approach.
Once inside the building, the real challenge began. Finding Sneaky Polomare, and capturing her, without drawing too much attention.
As Pinkie Pie wandered through the hallways of Sneaky's boutique, she kept one eye out for any possible security guards or devices, while the other eye tried to spot Sneaky from afar.
Suddenly, as she rounded a corner, Pinkie Pie's ears picked up a conversation between two ponies that sounded rather urgent.
Carefully, Pinkie Pie crept towards the source of the conversation, stopping just on the other side of a door that was slightly ajar.
Peering one eye through the tiny gap, Pinkie Pie was just able to make out Sneaky Polomare talking with somepony else.
"So, Silver Streak was captured you say?" Sneaky Polomare asked.
"Yes," replied a gruff, stallionly voice "It's likely he's already squealed where he gets his information. They'll be coming after you any day now."
Much to Pinkie Pie's surprise, Sneaky Polomare replied by saying "Good, let them come. I've lured them to me like moths to a light. When they least expect it, they'll fall right into my trap."
"Speaking of trap, what do you want me to do with 'her'?" the unknown stallion asked Sneaky.
"Do whatever you please, but keep her alive!" Sneaky insisted "Just make sure she can't escape, she'll make an excellent bargaining chip when we make our demands known! It won't be long until everything I've hoped for is accomplished!"
"Yes ma'am! I'll see to it that she's not going anywhere." the stallion promised, and left the room.
"They got Bon Bon?" Pinkie Pie thought to herself, barely able to restrain herself before she gasped. Even if Pinkie Pie still held something of a grudge against the mare, she never would've wanted her to get caught.
Pinkie Pie quickly shook her head "I'll worry about her if and when I find her," she thought to herself "For now, I need to find out what Sneaky's next move is." Observing Sneaky through the opening, Pinkie Pie kept a close watch, her Breezie Cam ready and waiting to snap a picture.
But then Sneaky did something that Pinkie Pie wasn't expecting at all. Humming a small tune to herself, her eyes turned a faint shade of lime green, and in a flash of blinding light, she began to transform, revealing herself as a changeling.
Pinkie Pie gasped, and accidentally pressed the red button, causing the Breezie Cam to admit a flash as it snapped a picture of the changeling posing as Sneaky Polomare.
"Who's there?!" the changeling demanded, as the flash alerted her to the presence of somepony else. But when she trotted over to the source of the disturbance, she was surprised to find that nopony was around. Unknown to her, Pinkie Pie (now clad fully in her stealth suit), was perched just above her, carefully trying to conceal herself within the shadows of the ceiling.
The changeling shook her head "You're imaging things, Alpha Drone. The stress of this operation is getting to you. In a matter of days, it will all be over, and you'll be welcomed back into the herd with open hooves. You'll show them all how foolish they were to think the changeling threat was over. The drone at that Ponyville wedding was a disgrace to his kind." And she left the room through a secret elevator concealed by a brick wall.
The revelation that Sneaky Polomare was actually a changeling changed everything, but Pinkie Pie knew she still needed to gather up evidence before making her escape. Even if capturing the changeling disguised as Sneaky was all but impossible, Pinkie Pie could still thwart whatever schemes she was planning.
With the changeling having left her office, Pinkie Pie searched through the lavish decorted room for any clues or leads. Snapping photos with her Breezie Cam if she spotted anything that looked promising.
One of the things that stood out the most in "Sneaky"'s office, were a series of diamonds that lay scattered all across her desk. Diamonds tended to be a rare find, even among Equestria's aristocracy. Seeing them on anything but wedding rings, or in jewelry stores, was enough to prompt Pinkie Pie to inspect them personally.
She was surprised to discover a faint powdery substance on them. Her curiosity getting the best of her, she licked it, and winced at how salty it was. Then, it hit her "Salty, just like a mine. Of course, these diamonds must be from the newly discovered diamond mines in The Frozen North. Maud told me all about. I'll bet that's where that changeling drone's going to to sell the information!" Without further ado, she scooped the diamonds into her saddle bag. Something told her that they would prove useful back at PI9, whenever she got back.
But as she left "Sneaky Polomare"'s office, Pinkie Pie's 'Pinkie Sense' gave off its signal to be weary of opening doors! An ear flop, followed by an eye flutter, and finally a knee twitch. Quickly diving for cover behind the office desk, Pinkie Pie listened, as she heard hooves passing by. Two random stallions were having a conversation.
"I'm getting sick of having to watch that mare, and she's only been our prisoner for the better half of a day!" the first stallion complained "I wish Alpha Drone would let us get rid of her!"
"Just be grateful she's locked up and powerless," the second stallion replied "Boss says we keep her around until she's outlived her usefulness, then we snuff her out like a light!"
"Oh yeah, that'll be fun!" the first stallion chuckled fiendishly "I just hope she doesn't lose that fighting spirit while she's rotting away, it's always fun to see them struggle!"
As the two stallions walked away, and the sounds of their hooves became distant, Pinkie Pie felt a wave of concern and horror wash over her. "I've got to find Bon Bon and get her out of here before Alpha Drone can make her demands!" Pinkie Pie thought to herself, and headed for the elevator "I'll probably hate myself in the morning, but if we're both interested in the same goal, she at least deserves a fighting chance!"
Special Agent Sweetie Drops (a.k.a Bon Bon) was gazing out at the window from her prison cell, deep below the boutique. She had discovered the truth about Sneaky Polomare, only to end up getting captured by some of her subordinates.
Currently, she was chained to a bench by a thick metal lock, and the guards had been quite insistant on hiding the key really well. They were under orders not to let Special Agent Sweetie Drops out of their sight.
Suddenly, the guards ears picked up the faint sound of something striking the floor. They looked down, and saw a tiny metal pellet of some sort. But they had little time to ponder what it was, for at that moment, the pellet admitted a strange green gas that was powerful enough to knock them out right then and there.
The gas did not reach Special Agent Sweetie Drops' cell, much to her relief. But then, through the gas emerged a figure that seemed strangely familiar. "Is that who I think it is?!" Special Agent Sweetie Drops thought to herself.
Her question was answered a few seconds later, as the figure pulled out what looked like a breezie, and pressed a button. A powerful laser beam shot out from the object, melting away the lock to the cell, and allowing the figure to enter. It was then that Special Agent Sweetie Drops saw that the figure was clad in a familiar black stealth suit, complete with night vision goggles. "You?! I should've known you were behind this!" Special Agent Sweetie Drops exclaimed.
"You've got it all wrong, Miss. Bon, I'm here to rescue you!" Pinkie Pie replied, as she trained her Breezie Cam's laser on the metal lock holding Bon Bon to the bench.
"But why? We're enemies!" Bon Bon said angrily.
"We're after the same goal, even if we are from different agencies," Pinkie Pie explained, as she finished cutting the lock. With an audiable thud, the melted lock hit the floor, and Bon Bon was free. "Come on, let's get you out of here! Maybe, while I'm at it, you could tell me what C.A.K.E stands for!" Pinkie Pie said, as she grabbed Bon Bon, and raced back through the cell door. The gas had long since stopped.
"They're getting away!" a security guard shouted, as he opened a glass cage, and pressed his dark blue hoof against a bright red button to trigger an alarm "Stop them!"
Pinkie Pie and Bon Bon raced for the exit, only to find their way blocked by a group of identical looking security guards. They were all earth pony stallions with black coats, and faded brown manes and tails styled into mohawks.
"There's nowhere for you to run!" the guards threatened "Surrender, or be destroyed!"
Pinkie Pie quickly turned to Bon Bon and whispered "When I give the signal, run for it!" And she proceeded to pull out her miniature party cannon.
"What are you doing?!" Bon Bon asked.
"Just be prepard to run, now!" Pinkie Pie shouted, as she pressed the button for the emergency flares, and shot one straight up into the air.
The guards were momentarily distracted by the flare's brightness, giving Pinkie Pie and Bon Bon just enough of a window to escape. "Here, have one for the road! Courtesy of PI9, and myself!" Pinkie Pie shouted, as she fired off a series of streamers from her cannon, and blasting the guards with them.
The two secret agents escaped through the basement door, and quickly slammed it shut.
"That was close. Those flares from T really saved our hides." Pinkie Pie said to Bon Bon, breathing a sigh of relief.
"That was a pretty clever use of a toy," Bon Bon smirked "Not that I needed your help to escape. I could've gotten out of there anytime I wanted."
"Sure, sure, just keep telling yourself that. I guess I just saved you the trouble," Pinkie Pie replied "Now, why don't you tell me what C.A.K.E stands for?"
Bon Bon sighed, but as the two secret agents walked away, she explained anyway "It's the name of the agency I work for," she told Pinkie Pie "It stands for, Celestia's Agency for Kapture of Escaped convicts. Anything involving Tartarus and its prisoners is my speciality. Even if my agency was only recently reinstated."
"Ah, I might have known Princess Celestia would have her own agency to counter her sister's." Pinkie Pie replied, as she neared the T-Bike.
"Yes, well I'm afraid I can't just let you walk away with that information." Bon Bon said seriously.
Pinkie Pie suddenly felt herself growing nervous "What do you mean?" she asked Bon Bon, before she was shot with a dart that put her to sleep.
"Under different circumstances, this would be the end of our time together." Bon Bon thought unhappily to herself. Alas, this time, things were a bit different. One agent wasn't going to be enough.
For how long she slept, Pinkie Pie was unaware. To her it seemed like only minutes, but she suspected it was much longer than that. But however long she slept was unimportant, for as Pinkie Pie opened her eyes, she found herself back in the familiar brightly lit underground headquarters of PI9.
"Well, look who finally woke up," Bat Wings teased, as Pinkie Pie's eyes opened fully "I was starting to think it'd take an earthquake to wake you up."
"Leave me alone, Bat Wings," Pinkie Pie complained, yawning slightly "I'm in no mood for jokes. After I went and saved that C.A.K.E agent, she repays me by shooting a dart in my face! And I imagine she just sped away afterwards on my T-Bike! If that her's way of showing gratitude, remind me never to do favors for her again."
"Really 001, is that what you think of me?" Bon Bon asked, her hooves folded across her chest in frustration.
Pinkie Pie jumped up "Bon Bon.... er I mean, Special Agent Sweetie Drops?! What are you doing in PI9 headquarters?!" she exclaimed.
"I invited her here of course," Princess Luna explained, drawing Pinkie Pie's attention "I must admit, I wasn't quite sure what to make of you saving Special Agent Sweetie Drops life. But while you were enjoying your little nap, Special Agent Sweetie Drops and I have been discussing important matters. I understand that you discovered the real culprit is a changeling known as Alpha Drone."
"Let me guess, Special Agent Sweetie Drops told you all about that." Pinkie Pie muttered. She was glad Bon Bon had brought her back to PI9 headquarters, but she still didn't understand what she had done to justify being shot with a sleep dart.
"That's correct," Princess Luna nodded "However, Alpha Drone's exact location is currently unknown. And finding out where she would most likely be hiding would be impossible, were it not for the diamonds you secured back in Manehattan. It fits the evidence that Alpha Drone has been using a variety of different pony disguises, to obtain top secret information, and sell it to the highest bidder. And she's found a buyer for the Tartarus information somewhere in the diamond mines of The Frozen North."
"But that still doesn't explain why Sweetie Drops is here." Pinkie Pie complained.
"Considering the speciality of her agency, Special Agent Sweetie Drops has just as much of a reason to ensure that Alpha Drone doesn't squeal as we do," Princess Luna told Pinkie Pie "And if this operation is successful, it could lead to a promising future of cooperation with C.A.K.E. They are an agency so powerful, that they could easily oppose us if necessary. And I want to at least make an effort to extend the olive branch of friendship to them, before it's too late. Look, any two bit special agent can follow orders, but the best of the best are the ones who can take their ego out of the equation. I'm not saying you have to like working with Special Agent Sweetie Drops, but for the sake of this organization, and Equestria, the least you can do is try not to let your personal feelings get in the way. Having an extra pair of hooves will prove useful on this assignment, because Alpha Drone is known for being hard to capture."
Pinkie Pie sighed, but reluctantly agreed "Fine, I'll work with her for the duration of this assignment. But don't expect me to just forget what she did to me."
"Well, that was my way of paying you back for leaving me stranded on that train!" Bon Bon replied.
"That's enough, you two," Princess Luna warned "You're working together now, so no petty squabbling, at least until the job is done!" Both Pinkie Pie and Bon Bon said nothing, and simply looked away. "Oh, and one more thing before you go," Princess Luna said to Pinkie Pie, as she gave her a small canister of some sort "T wanted me to give you this. It's a fuel source for your T-Jet. He says it's stable enough to provide sufficent thrust to lift you off the ground, but it hasn't been fully field tested, so use it only as a last resort."
After pumping the fuel source into her T-Jet and throwing away the canister, Pinkie Pie followed Bon Bon to the T Bike, and the two of them sped off to the Crystal Mountains. The ride passed in silence, for neither Pinkie Pie or Bon Bon were willing to say anything to the other. The two of them knew they would need to put aside their differences until the mission was completed, but that was easier said than done.
At last, after about half an hour of travel, the two secret agents reached the diamond mines of the Frozen North. The harsh winds and bitter temperatures left little to the imagination in regards to how the land got its name.
"There's a huge number of diamond mines here! How are we supposed to find which one Alpha Drone is in?" Pinkie Pie wondered out loud.
"Leave that to me," Bon Bon boasted, and doned the same pair of shades she had worn when she and Pinkie Pie had first encountered each other, back on the train to Manehattan "With these shades, finding Alpha Drone won't be a problem."
"How so? They look like an ordinary pair of sunglasses to me," Pinkie Pie replied "And this is a part of Equestria where Celestia's sun rarely shines."
Bon Bon didn't answer right away, she just looked at the ground as if she were eyeing something. At last, she spoke up and said above the roaring wind "There's a pair of hoof prints leading to the mine on the far right!"
"How would you know that?! I can't see anything!" Pinkie Pie shouted in response.
"These sunglasses are equipped with heat seaking vision," Bon Bon explained "Follow my lead! We've wasted enough time here!"
Reluctantly, Pinkie Pie followed Bon Bon on the T-Bike, mentally thanking T for having the foresight to install snow tires just for this sort of occasion. At last, Bon Bon stopped in front of the mine entrance, where a thick metal gate greeted the agents eyes.
"So, you weren't pulling my leg after all, I'm impressed." Pinkie Pie said with a smile.
Bon Bon nodded, and proceeded to dig into her saddle bag "Just give me a few seconds, and we'll blast our way through the door!"
"I have a better idea!" Pinkie Pie replied, and whipped out her Breezie Cam "Do you see that air duct up there?" she asked Bon Bon, who nodded slightly "Well, I'll send this little baby through it, and see if there's a switch that unlocks the door from inside the mine. It's much more stealthy than blowing the gate up, wouldn't you agree?"
"I suppose so, but if that camera fails, it's back to square one." Bon Bon warned.
With a silent nod to show she understood, Pinkie Pie activated the Breezie Cam's remote controls, and steered it carefully up and into the air duct, making use of the onboard monitor's link to her night vision goggles to properly maneuver it into the mine itself.
The gadget moved from room to room, searching for some sort of control pannel or button that could open the door. But then, suddenly, a voice shouted out "What is that?! Quick, shoot it down before spots the boss!" There was a bright flash of magic, and the camera crashed to the ground, the video feed clicking off due to the damage.
"They destroy the Breezie Cam!" Pinkie Pie exclaimed. Just seconds later, there was a massive boom from just in front of her. Apparently, Bon Bon had already set up the explosives with which to blow the door down.
But when the smoke cleared, the metal gate was still standing. Slightly dented, but otherwise not scratched.
"An explosion proof gate," Bon Bon muttered angrily to herself "They really thought of everything, didn't they?"
"Well, maybe there's still a way for us to get inside," Pinkie Pie explained "I just hope the T-Phone's laser still works." And sure enough, it did. It took some time, but the laser from the T-Phone was able to cut through the door, creating a big enough opening for Pinkie Pie and Bon Bon to enter with the T-Bike.
Once inside the mine, the two agents split up. Pinkie Pie took the tunnel on the left, and Bon Bon took the tunnel on the right. But before they split up, the sceret agents exchanged contact information, so they could keep in touch.
Not long after traveling down the left tunnel, Pinkie Pie found her way blocked by an electronic gate. "Guess, it's time to try out the T-Phone's decryptor program." she thought to herself, whiping her out trusty T-Phone once again, and cycling through the programs until she had selected the decryptor one. This program contained a small computer that was supposedly powerful enough to hack and override any control pannel or device.
With a few well placed clicks, the gate opened, and Pinkie Pie made her way further into the mine.
Then, up ahead, Pinkie Pie spotted Alpha Drone slowly walking away. Carefully avoiding detection, Pinkie Pie crept as close as she could, and whipped out her miniature party cannon. "I've got to be careful, I've only got one shot at this." Pinkie Pie thought to herself, and pressed the button that allowed her miniature party cannon to fire tracker darts. She shot one, and it managed to successfully hit Alpha Drone on her back right knee.
Pinkie Pie then waited until Alpha Drone was out of sight, before contacting Bon Bon. "Special Agent Sweetie Drops, this is 001," she whispered, while hiding carefully behind a pile of diamonds "I've managed to successfully tag Alpha Drone, and intend to follow her until a good opportunity for an ambush presents itself. Have you found her contact yet?"
"Not yet, 001," Bon Bon called back "But I've discovered something you're not going to like. Alpha Drone's minions have planted timed detonators at the heart of the mine. When the exchange is complete, they'll activate the countdown to blow up this entire mine, and erase all evidence of the transactions that occurred here!"
"Then we'd better capture Alpha Drone and her contact before that can happen!" Pinkie Pie replied.
"Right," Bon Bon said seriously, then she gasped "001, I think I just saw.... Wait, what the....." The rest of her conversation was cut off by the sound of static.
"Special Agent Sweetie Drops?! Sweetie Drops, do you read me?!" Pinkie Pie called, but there was no response. Somehow, Bon Bon had been attacked and/or captured. Either by Alpha Drone's contact, or one of Alpha Drone's minions.
"That does it! The time for stealth is over!" Pinkie Pie thought to herself, and quickly rushed forward from her hiding spot.
Alpha Drone became aware of the sound of hooves running towards her. But as soon as she turned to look, she was tackled full force by Pinkie Pie.
"Let my friend go, now!" Pinkie Pie demanded.
"I don't know who you are or who you're talking about," Alpha Drone replied, punching Pinkie Pie "But you can't possibly expect me to just do as you say. I've come too far to let some do gooder like you get the best of me!"
Pinkie Pie refused to listen, and she and Alpha Drone continued to fight it out for a couple of minutes, as they made their way from one tunnel to another.
"Just give up and admit defeat," Alpha Drone insisted "It'll make things much easier for the both of us!"
"Never! 00 agents never surrender to evil doers!" Pinkie Pie vowed, as she and Alpha Drone battled for a little bit longer, reaching the main tunnel at the heart of the mine in the process.
At last, just when it seemed as if she had no more strength left, Pinkie Pie was able to deliver a powerful punch that knocked Alpha Drone out cold. But the victory was short lived.
Only seconds after Alpha Drone was defeated, a powerful (not to mention booming) male voice called out "Hold it right there, 001!"
Pinkie Pie looked around for the voice's owner, finally spotting it standing on a platform directly above her. The voice's owner was a black feathered griffon with a scar across his right cheek, and metal braces on his wings. Pinkie Pie recognized him as one of Equestria's most wanted criminals, a fearsome pirate/bomber named "Steel Claw".
Clutched firmly in Steel Claw's talons was Bon Bon, who was struggling in vain to break free. "I caught this little worm crawling around my mine, and now I've managed to capture another slimy worm that never should've crawled out of the ground!"
"Let me go, or so help me, I'll give bite marks in places you'd never dream of!" Bon Bon threatened.
"Release her at once!" Pinkie Pie threatened, even as she was surrounded by Alpha Drone's minions.
"No can do I'm afraid," Steel Claw said with a shake of his head "I'm waited a long time for that Tartarus information, and nopony is going to come between me and what I want! If you give me Alpha Drone and the information, I'll release your friend. If not, she'll be sleeping with the fishes. And you know what I mean by that." Bon Bon tried to speak up in protest, but Steel Claw quickly put a talon to her mouth, effectively silencing her.
Pinkie Pie looked around, but saw that there was no where she could run. There was no way she could get the drop on Steel Claw, unless...
"Well, 001, what's it going to be?" Steel Claw asked, still holding Bon Bon firmly in his clutches "Will you do as I ask? Or are you going to play hero and scarifice this mare to protect Equestria?"
"I'll give you Alpha Drone," Pinkie Pie said with a sigh "Just give me a second or two to unload my things. After all, you wouldn't want me to surprise you. Like this!" And before Steel Claw realized what was going on, Pinkie Pie grabbed her miniature party cannon, pressed the button to launch flares, and fired one into the air.
Pinkie Pie and Bon Bon shielded their eyes, but Steel Claw and the minions were not so fortunate. "Aaaaaaaahhhhhhhhhhhhhh! MY EEEEEEEEEYYYYYYYYEEESSSSSSSS!" Steel Claw screamed, as the flare blinded him for a couple of minutes, this give Bon Bon just enough to kick him and make him drop her. Then, together, Pinkie Pie (who grappled up to Bon Bon's position with her grapple pen), and Bon Bon brought Steel Claw down with a series of punches and kicks.
"This is all your fault!" Alpha Drone complained, as she and Steel Claw were tied up "If you had simply followed my orders, and done away with that mare first, we wouldn't be in this mess!"
"Your the one who kept that other mare around when she was a threat to the operation!" Steel Claw replied "I never should've trusted you!"
"Well, you'll both have time to reflect on your life choices, once PI9 and C.A.K.E are done with you." Bon Bon chuckled.
"Knowing what you two have tried to do, I'd start praying for mercy." Pinkie Pie added.
"Stop celebrating, you haven't won yet!" Alpha Drone insisted "Or did you forget about my detonators?!"
"What?!" Pinkie Pie and Bon Bon exclaimed, and turned to look. Sure enough, they saw that the detonators Bon Bon had learned about, had been activated. They were already counting down from two minutes!
"Well, time to make our escape! I just hope the T-Bike is fast enough!" Pinkie Pie said to Bon Bon, and prepared to call it through her headset.
Unfortunately, just as Pinkie Pie was about to do so, a warning message popped up in her night vision goggles that read "Suspicious passenger detected, self destruct sequence activated." And a second later, a faint boom could be heard in the distance.
"So much for the T-Bike." Bon Bon said with a shake of her head.
"Well then, I guess I've got no other choice," Pinkie Pie realized "It's time to see just how well this T-Jet really works!"
"You can't be serious! Flying a jetpack through an enclosed space! There's no way that will end well!" Bon Bon replied.
"If you've got a better idea, I'd love to hear it!" Pinkie Pie demanded, but Bon Bon said nothing "That's what I thought!" Pinkie Pie said, as she grabbed Bon Bon, and the tied up Alpha Drone and Steel Claw. After flipping a switch, the T-Jet began to whine. The whine grew louder and louder, until, with a roar, Pinkie Pie rocketed away.
Just seconds after Pinkie Pie took off, the detonators reached zero, and a massive explosion began to rip through the diamond mine. But with the help of her T-Jet, Pinkie Pie was barely able to stay ahead of the explosion (which destroyed the remaints of both the T-Bike and the Breezie Cam). Just as the last of the fuel began to run out, Pinkie Pie saw the mine entrance. "Hang on tight, this is gonna be close!" she shouted to her passengers, all of which shut their eyes, and waited for the sound of a crash.
But the crash never came. Instead, Pinkie Pie was able to use her T-Phone's laser program to widen the hole in the metal gate at the mine's entrance so that she and her passengers could fit through.
Once outside of the mine, Pinkie Pie flew forward for a bit longer, before landing in the snow and deactivating her T-Jet.
"Thanks for your help, 001," Bon Bon reluctantly said to Pinkie Pie "You saved my life, twice."
"Well, I couldn't just leave you to die," Pinkie Pie replied "Not when there was a chance for PI9 and C.A.K.E to become allies."
Bon Bon was silent for a moment and said nothing else, then she turned her attention to Alpha Drone and Steel Claw "C.A.K.E will deal with these two, and if PI9 needs to get involved, you'll know."
"I take it this means I can count on working with you in the future, Special Agent Sweetie Drops?" Pinkie Pie asked.
"Maybe," Bon Bon replied "In the meantime, if you need my help, you know how to contact me." And with that, she took off, taking Alpha Drone and Steel Claw with her.
Now, Pinkie Pie was alone. But she didn't mind. "Well, nothing left to do now but catch the train back to Canterlot and inform Princess Luna of another job well done." she thought to herself, and walked away from the flaming wreckage of the diamond mine, even as Alpha Drone's minions were looking on in horror at seeing the fortune inside it be destroyed (they had fled the blast from the moment the detonators had been activated).
Unknown to everyone, a single diamond lay buried in the snow close to where Pinkie Pie had been standing.
(Credits sequence)
Author's Note
And so, with the release of the newest James Bond film known as S.P.E.C.T.E.R.E, I am pleased to present the third installment of this James Bond parody series.
The title draws inspiration from two sources. The first is the recent spy action film known as "The Man From U.N.C.L.E", and the second is from the James Bond spoof series known as Austin Powers, more specifically the third film which is titled "Austin Powers In: Goldmember".
Since Special Agent Sweetie Drops captured everyone's attention back in "Slice of Life" I knew I had to include her in this installment. The ironic thing is, for those who read the last installment you would know that I made Lyra a rival secret agent, and used a PMV of "A View To A Kill" for the title sequence.
