A tale of weed.

by Anon ymous

Rating: teen
Tags: Human, Comedy, Random
Length: 1262

Two bros smoking weed get sent to Equestria .

Two bros smoking weed get sent to Equestria .

Published 1970-01-01 00:00:00 UTC
Last updated 2015-10-25 19:14:30 UTC

That one chapter

Two bros, smoking weed in the outbacks of florida, by which we mean Bro number one's back yard, we're chilling, and having the most intense and articulate conversation in the world, at that time;

“My nigga?” the first bro asked, holding up his favorite dab rig.

"My nigga." The second bro confirmed, clinking his bong to the first Bro's dab rig.

"My nigga? My nigga, my nigga." The second bro continued.

“My nigga.” the first bro stated while walking to his fridge. He opened it and screamed. “my nigga!”

"My nigga?" The second bro asked from the other room. He walked over to stand behind the first, before being suddenly whipped into the fridge by a swirling vortex of rainbows.

They were both suddenly deposited on the outskirts of a large forest, where the second bro came back to consciousness first.

"My nigga." The second bro facepalmed, before shaking the first awake.

“My nigga!” The first bro exclaimed, getting back to his feet after the harsh fall they had both taken, and helping the second bro to his feet.

A rustling in the bushes to the two Bro's left indicated that something was coming, so with bloodshot eyes they turned their heads to look at the pink maned horse - thing with wings, that looked oddly like a human and a horse had decked to get freaky. That's also when the bros realized they had no clothes on.

"My nigga!" The second bro exclaimed in surprise.

“My nigga, my nigga!” the first agreed.

"Oh, my! New animals, I've never seen anything like you two before! I'm Fluttershy, by the way." The yellow pegasus rushed over to examine them.

"My nigga!" The second bro shouted while he was inadvertently being molested.  He started pushing her off, "My nigga."

"What's wrong?" She asked in a concerned, motherly voice. "Why can't I understand you? I can understand all the other animals."

“My nigga.” the first bro stated before shrugging.

"Why don't you come with me to my cottage, that way we can identify you two." She pushed them along with her wings all the way to her cottage.

“My nigga!” they both protested before finally giving up and followed the pegasus.

They had just entered the cottage when a white bunny hopped up and seemed to ask a question to their gracious host.

"My nigga?" Bro number two asked.

The white rabbit turned on the spot with a shocked expression, well as shocked as a rabbit could ever look, and asked an important question. "My nigga?"

"My nigga!!!!" The bros shouted in unison.

All the while Fluttershy had gone and gotten her encyclopedia of animals, maybe she could find out what the two ape like creatures were.

"My nigga?" Bro number one asked.

"My nigga." Angel bunny confirmed.

And so the two Bro's and Angel bunny set off, in search of a certain seven pointed leafed plant. A cry from a far away cottage went out.

"Angel, what happened to our two new guest?!"

Angel lead the two Bro's through Ponyville, where they earned lots of stares from the residents.

"My nigga?” The first bro asked the small rabbit quietly, staring right back at all the ponies.

"My nigga, my nigga, my nigga." The bunny answered, placating him.

Soon they walked into a hollowed out wooden tree, which happens to be a library, the bros guessed, passing judgment on the extreme amount of books.

"My niiiiiiigggggggggaaaaa." The second bro breathed out.

Angel proceeded to hop to some low books and pull them out, where they flew haphazardly on the floor.  The first book landed right in front of bro number one. It read: proper joint rolling procedure volume 2A.

“My nigga!” he shouted before handing it to bro number two.

“My nigga.” he said, nodding in approval.

Angel hopped over to both of the bros who were busy reading the book and threw a book at bro number two’s head.

“My nigga!” he shouted, glaring at the small white rabbit.

“My nigga, my nigga.” the first bro said before smiling, gesturing to what the small rabbit had under his arm, a large bag of weed.

“My nigga.” the second bro bent down and picked up the bag, and began to roll a joint, with a page torn from the aforementioned book.

The bros and Angel were smoking up a storm for a solid 2 hours laughing at the hilarious jokes in the language of my nigganeise.

"My nigga, my nigga, my nigga, my nigga!" Bro number one told his funniest jest.

"My nigga." Angel and bro number two threw back their heads in laughter.

Just after the joke was said a purple mare with a green accented lizard on her back burst into the library, absolutely seething with unadulterated rage at the fact that their dank weed cache was being used without their consent.

"What in the hell! I was saving that for next Wednesday, you bloody fuckers!" Twilight shouted.

"My nigga." The first bro placated and proceeded to roll up another joint, much to Twilight's chagrin at the ripped up book, and handed it to the angry mare.

"Okay, I have no idea what you guys are saying." She tried to sound scary and intimidating, but she soon gave into the alluring scent of the dank Marijuana. Grabbing the joint and the proffered lighter, that bro number two pulled out of his ass earlier, she lit it up and put it in her mouth.

"Maybe you guys aren't so bad, I mean all you had to do was ask for some weed before getting into my stash." The completely chill mare said.

After a couple more hours of some good dab, a giant white mare burst forth and out of the front window of the library, carrying a lot of weed and proper joint rolling papers on her back.

"My nigga!" The two Bros and Angel shouted in surprise.

"Princess Celestia is in the house!" The pony process announced. "Sorry I'm late but I had to push my responsibilities on to my sister, but no worries, I'm here now, my niggas."

There was a faint shout on the wind that sounded a little like "Go fuck thyself sister." But the five of them went to rolling lighting and smoking more weed, in favor of ignoring the shout.

They all smoked Marijuana late into the night, Celestia revealing that she knew nigganeise, much to twilight confusion. But when all was said and done the two Bros knew they had to get back to bro number one's house before the cops showed up and found all of the evidence that they were addicts to the dank kush.

"My nigga, my nigga, my nigga." Bro number two explained their problem.

Celestia nodded and responded in kind with her own "my nigga." She then slipped them a note with eleven digits on it, and teleported them somewhere in a bright flash of light.

"Who were those magnificent bastards?" Twilight asked Celestia.

With a tear in her eye she responded, "True niggas, and true bros." She sat down and looked to the ceiling seeming to gaze past it. "They will be sorely missed, for the time being."

Back at Bro number one's back yard sirens were heard that seemed to match the blue and red flashing lights coming from the front yard of bro number one's house.

The two Bro's looked to each other and said their first full sentence in the entire duration of this shitty little fic, "Shit nigga, we're balls deep in the popo."