Cotton Candy Dreams

by Twilightclopple

Rating: mature
Tags: Romance, Sad
Length: 4553

When Pinkie is in the depths, who will pull her out?

Sometimes we all fall. When we do, who will be there to catch us?

Published 1970-01-01 00:00:00 UTC
Last updated 2012-06-03 00:44:02 UTC

Falling Down

     The air tasted sweet and crisp as it kissed her face, lingering as it swept throuh her mane. Every droplet that hit her coat did so with the most melodic tinkle, quite surreal in actuality. The ground melted below her hooves like a chocolate river, daring to whisk her away to a cocoa ocean, and a marshmallow island. The sky spread a sweet pink-yellow sunset between horizons, fading into a solemn indigo upon which stars twinkled like diamonds.

     She sighed, feeling her worries leave her chest and catch in the breeze, blowing them away in a haze she did not need to follow. A weight lifted from her chest; she was free, free from the darkness that consumed her days, fading to the swirling vortex that reflected the torments of her own mind.

     She breathed another sigh into the sweet air, one for her troubles. One for pain. One for unrequited love. Each was swept away like nothing, just another dust particle in a cotton candy dream.

     Closing her eyes, she watched the light play on her eyelids, each drop of luminescence more brilliant than the next.  The breeze whispered into her ear, promising the very words she'd so longed to hear.

     Everything will be alright.

     The words calmed her mind like the softest melody. Pinkie looked to the sky, letting the gentle glow of the setting sun warm her face as she breathed once more. She wanted to follow the sun as it set, never leave it behind.

     The ocean glittered under the light of the orange sun, beckoning for Pinkie to join it, to chase the light. She imagined drifting away in the glow, drifting to the undiscovered land of better things on the other side.

     Pinkie went to take a step toward the horizon. Her legs couldn't move, weighted with infinitely heavy chains that twthered her to the ground. With another tug at her immobile legs, Pinkie watched the sun as it slipped over the horizon.

     The last vestiges of light wisped away, and Pinkie was once again left in darkness.

*~*~*

     Pinkamena Diane Pie awoke in a thick daze to the sound of rain as it splashed the ground around her. Willing herself to open her eyes, she tore her mind from the dream universe. The ground felt cold and slippery underneath her, and she slowly gathered where she was.

     The grass grew high in the field where the mare lay, in the middle of absolute nowhere. The ground under her was nothing more than a brown sludge, sodden with rainwater and grassy debris, creating an unpleasant brown stain on her gray-pink coat.

     Pinkie figured it was probably morning, yet there was no sunshine to be seen. The sky was covered by a thick dark gray cloud layer, woven tightly so that not a single ray could penetrate it. As she continued to gather her thoughts, the pony became mildly aware of the rainfall that was rolling off of her pin straight hair and matting her coat.

     When a shiver rolled down her spine, Pinkie resolved that it was probably time to go, lest she sicken herself in the cold. And so, for the third time in a week, Pinkie Pie left the muddy field and made her way home.

*~*~*

     The streets were deserted as she walked through them, indifferent to the icy rain as it soaked her coat. A bakery came into view through the sleet, and Pinkie Pie entered through the seldom-used back door, avoiding contact with anypony as she went. She let the door close behind her with a click, listening to the dulled noises of the rain as it fell just outside.

     The room was thick with dust, every surface coated with a layer of it in neglect. Apart from a worn chair and a bed, the room was dark and barren, the gray stone walls reflecting the pony who resided between them. Utter, sickening silence spread like a plague as Pinkie made her way to the bed, not caring that she was sodden, and sat.

     The room was monochrome and lifeless, every bit of color peeled away by the pony on the bed. She had spent the entire previous day peeling the brightly colored wallpaper from the walls with relish, tossing out colorful rugs and bedding as if it were the rankest garbage. The room now positively reeked of despair, the grayness mirroring the weather outside. The only difference was the lack of rain.

     Pinkamena could remember the other pony who had once lived here as if she was a distant memory, despite her being from only two days ago. Curly pink hair, bubbly and bouncy for no good reason; Pinkamena regarded her as a pony quite far from herself, a whole other entity. Old Pinkie was nothing more than a ghost of a pony, one for which Pinkamena held only the highest levels of disdain.

     She sailed through life, smiling stupidly without ever really knowing why. She was foolish and childish, dumb and ignorant, unaware of everything that was transpiring around her that would only lead to her own exile and self-destruction.

     Two days had passed since she'd awoken from this ignorant, foggy stupidity, two of the most revealing days of her existance. Her friends, nothing but a pack of bumbling lowlifes, had planned this all along, playing along, attending her parties, laughing with her in what was nothing more that the most perverted mockery in Pinkamena's history.

     'Friends.' The most misused, cavalier term in the dictionary. Pinkie never had any, she was nothing but a simple piece in a complex ruse that took advantage of her blindly trusting nature. How could she possibly have been so unimaginably stupid? Her 'friends' not liking her parties, not wanting to be her 'friends' any longer? It was so blatantly obvious it brouht nausea to her stomach. She had been a trusting hog, leaning against the workers as they led her to slaughter.

     Not anymore. Those coldhearted urchins were kidding themselves if they thought their toy would never wise up to their schemes. New Pinkamena was out of her coma, sharper than ever, ready to pierce through whatever web of deceit they had built around her. She was ready to face the sunlight now, and extinguish it. Never again would Pinkie Pie be taken for a fool.

     Pinkamena would rise from the shadows, rise from the sickest, filthiest recesses of her mind and protect her. Always.

*~*~*

     She was running on a schedule. There was a party to be had this afternoon, and she was not one to cancel and disappoint her guests. Pinkamena was expecting important company.

     She greeted her guests as graciously as a host would, offering to take their coats as she showed them to their places.

     "Good afternoon, Madame leFlour, so lovely to see you- Ah, Mr. Turnip, please allow me to take your cloak, I insist." She said as she took the cloak from the formal guest. "Please, right this way, Rocky." The guests were polite as any guest should be, following their host as she sat them at an elegant spread.

     A lavish cake stood proudly at the end of the table, next to a finely dressed aligator whose after-birthday the group celebrated. Madame leFlour was particularly jovial, recounting tale after tale of her youth in Prance, while eating as much cake. Not to worry, a satiated guest was a happy guest, and a happy guest meant a successful soiree.

     Pinkamena settled herself in her chair, feeling more comfortable than she had in two days. Her party was a clear success, every guest was satisfied and Gummy told her over and over how pleased he was with the spread. The air was alight with cheers and whoops of laughter and chatter as the guests interacted with eachother, pausing briefly to wish the special alligator a happy birthday and many more. Pinkamena had done it again, thrown a lovely party with some of her true friends, and naive Pinkie was fine. She would never be hurt again, as Pinkamena promised.

     Clearing her throat, Pinkamena stood in her chair. She tinked a spoon against her glass a couple times as her guests quieted and focused on her, listening with rapt attention. Pinkamena smiled as she began her acknowledgements, gesturing to her guest of honor at the head of the table.

     "Thank you all so much for coming," Pinkamena began, addressing her table with a smile. "It means so much to Gummy." Gummy thanked her once more from the other side of the table as the other guests murmured their assent. With those few simple words, Pinkamena sat back down to allow the party to proceed.

     Mr. Turnip must certainly have been thirsty, but it was no problem, there was more than enough punch. Pinkamena passed him a bowl as he thanked her politely and resumed his conversation with Rocky, who agreed that this truly was a gem of a party. Pinkamena accepted the compliment with a nod and a smile. He was quite right.

     From the other side of the table, Sir Lintsalot agreed with Rocky. "I'm having a delightful time as well." He said as Pinkamena lit up and thanked him.

     After Madame leFlour's fourth slice of cake, the conversation began to change.

     "I'm just glad none a them pony folk could show up!" Rocky declared, bouncing slightly in his seat from agitation. Pinkamena couldn't help but agree, but this was her party, and it was pivotal that the atmosphere stay positive.

     "Oh they're not so bad." She lied through her teeth. Lost in thought, she felt herself zone out, eyes rolling slightly as the fake smile stayed plastered on her face. Rocky disagreed.

     "Not so bad! Puh-lease! They're a buncha losahs!" He exclaimed. Once again, Pinkamena agreed, but tried fruitlessly to keep the table cheerful.

    "Oh come on now, 'losers' may be a little strong, doncha think?" She asked, looking at Rocky, though her attention was caught by Sir Lintsalot as he spoke up.

     "After the way they treated you? I'd say 'losers' isn't strong enough!" He offered. Pinkamena began to realize that staying positive wasn't in the cards for this discussion, and she was more than happy for a chance to vent. Besides, there was a plethora of words she could come up with that would better describe them than losers, some of which would make even Rainbow Dash hang her head.

     "It was pretty rude..." She concurred, grumbling as she thought of those maggots and what they did to her. Madame leFlour came to her defense; she could always count on her TRUE friends to agree with her.

     "Pretty rude? Eet was downright despeecable!" She declared, slamming down on the table in emphasis of her point. Pinkamena felt a bubble of anger and resolve swell in her chest. Thankfully Pinkie wasn't here to see this.

     "If I were you," Mr. Turnip, who had been quiet previously, began, "I wouldn't speak to them ever again."

     This sounded like a plan. "You know what? I'm NOT going to speak to them ever again! And I'm not going to invite them to another party so long as I live!" Pinkamena declared, firm as steel in her resolve. Her resolution was met with cheers of affirmation by her guests as they staged a minute coup against those ponies who had betrayed Pinkie.

     Pinkamena grew certain that this was quite possibly the best party she'd ever thrown. Could there be more perfect guests? They were so courteous and so charming, yet motivated and icy. In between exclaimations of 'quite right!' from Sir Lintsalot, Pinkamena beamed at the general glow of her soiree. It was so ideal, it was almost...unreal.

     But that was just crazy talk.

     Pinkamena's appraisal of her mini revolution was suddenly interrupted by a knock on the door. Her guests fell silent as she wondered aloud, "Who could that be?"

     A slightly nervous looking Rainbow Dash peered through the heart shaped cutout in the door before nudging it open. Pinkamena grew furious at the sight of the pony she despised. One of THEM.

     With a slightly exaggerated smile, Rainbow Dash began. "Uh, hi there Pinkie Pie...sorry about earlier, I was in a rush to be somewhere and couldn't slow down to say hello." She spoke nonchalantly, though nervousness peeked through the cracks in her voice. "You know how it goes."

     Pinkie Pie felt an inferno of anger and hatred well up inside her like a pool of rushing lava, hardening her insides. How dare she come in here, ruin my lovely party, and try to play me for a fool once more? As easy as it would be to just squash her right now with the element of surprise, she willed herself to wait. Pinkamena was all about timing.

     "I know how it goes, alright." She spat the words through her teeth, letting them crawl from her mouth and spit poison into the atmosphere.

     Rainbow Dash merely laughed nervously, an airy little laugh a few octaves too high. She then did the unthinkable; invite Pinkamena to Sweet Apple Acres with HER.

     Pinkamena saw red as she calmed herself, reminding herself that this pegasus was nothing more than a garden slug to her. The exchange that followed was done almost on autopilot, Pinkamena's instinct was taking over. She wouldn't let Pinkie get hurt again.

     What was this, a cruel joke? A mockery of her senses, a complete betrayal for the purpose of cheap laughs? Pinkamena seethed, burying Pinkie deeper and deeper, wrapping her tightly in a package hewn with the pain of betrayal and the hardness of lies. Sunlight would never permeate her again, it may well have been nothing but a distant memory.

     Rainbow Dash pulled her head from under Pinkamena's flank with a groan and a minute of strain. She'd been warned that bringing Pinkie in would be difficult, but she hadn't expected to meet Pinkamena, firm in her resolution as a lead brick.

     "Pinkie Pie! You-argh-have to come with-ugh- me!" Rainbow strained, shoving Pinkamena in the small of her back with her head. This was ridiculous; she was not returning to Sweet Apple Acres empty-handed.

     "Why would I ever go with you?!" Pinkamena demanded, pushing back against Rainbow with equal, if not greater force. Rainbow slid slightly backward; her hooves were beginning to lose traction.

     Rainbow Dash groaned in exasperation. "What the hay are you talking about, Pinkie Pie?!" She slid back another inch; any farther and she would go crashing into the wall. With a sudden burst of energy and a fateful push, Rainbow knocked Pinkamena over, who collided into Madame leFlour, knocking her over like a sack of meal.

     Pinkamena was dazed by the impact, though her fury burned as brightly as a dying star. Every bit of hatred she harbored in her came to a boil, spilling over as she lay crumpled at the floor of her party of insanity. In the second she spent lying there, Pinkie Pie clawed at her insides, breaking her bonds tied with hatred and self-loathing. She clawed at Pinkamena, pushing her into the depths she'd created for herself, sending her into the swirling abyss of resentment she'd fortified.

     Infernal anger turned to uncontrollable, all-consuming sadness before Pinkamena could stop it. It rushed to the surface like a raging river, a gift from Pinkie Pie, a little spark from her old self. Tears concentrated with self-hatred and betrayal seeped from her eyes, each sound they made hitting the floor a cacophany of the very lies she treachery she'd been surrounded with.

     "You think I don't know what you did?!" Pinkamena screamed from the floor, tears flowing as she made her last stand. "You think I don't know how much you hate me?!" She cried and cried, her voice breaking as she cried fom the depths of her very being. "I have news for you! You can never hate me more than I do!"

     Every tear that hit the floor was an outcry as Pinkamena released the greatest confession she ever could have, a truth she herself had locked away. Unrestrained self-loathing burned away at her insides like acid.

Rainbow Dash fell silent, simply staring in shock at her friend like this.

     She never would have guessed it. Pinkie Pie was the most cheerful pony she ever knew. But now, as Rainbow Dash stared at her slumped, sobbing form, it all seemed like the perfect coverup.

     "P-Pinkie Pie... I don't hate you." Rainbow began. I was true, of course, but her voice came out unsteadily. She was never good at this.

     Pinkamena continued to cry, her voice barely squeezed out between sobs. "No! I know you do, you all do!" She cried. "You never wanted to be my friend in the first place!"

     Rainbow's heart broke, shattered into a million tiny pieces. She couldn't bear to see her friend like this, it pained her deep inside. It had to be now or never.

     "Pinkie Pie." She began again. She walked over to where her friend sat, draping an arm over her shoulders and drawing her in a close embrace. Pinkamena buried her face into Rainbow's arm, quieting her sobs as she let a small stream of tears roll down her face.

     Pinkamea lost herself in the embrace. She had forgotton how much she needed the warm touch of another pony until it was her dear friend comforting her.

     "Pinkie Pie," Rainbow began for the third time, almost whispering in Pinkamena's ear. "I will always be your friend."

     Rainbow pulled away, leaving Pinkamena feeling empty once more. The cyan pegasus took a breath to steady herself as she took Pinkamena's face between her hooves, her own rose eyes meeting haunted, watery blue. This was the moment things could all change, for the both of them, forever.

     "I love you, Pinkie Pie."

     Pinkamena heard her, but swore the words not to be true. No one would love this stupid fool of a pony, no one ever could. Pinkamena thrust her flag into the claimed territory of Pinkie's being, when something unexpected happened. The ground crumbled beneath Pinkamena's hooves, sending her tumbling into the cages of icy hatred she herself had built. A shadow crawled from the pit, shielding herself from the sunlight as she emerged. Pinkie Pie would rise, and Pinkamena would never touch her again.

     When the pegasus didn't receive a reply, she began to worry. What if this were all a big mistake? How could she be so silly?

     Pinkie's voice broke through her friend's harrowing thoughts. "Y-you love me?" She loked at Rainbow Dash, pleading for her to reply with the words she wanted to hear.

     "I really do." Pinkie Pie melted, and she sighed, letting her worries blow away. She felt her hair begin to slowly curl as her colors began to grow more vibrant. Wave after wave of love washed over her, driving away the demons that had possessed her heart, filling her with an unfamiliar feeling, until the unthinkable happened.

     Rainbow Dash went on pure instinct, seizing the moment. If Pinkie wanted to pull away, she could, and the pegasus would not think any less of her.

     Pinkie Pie felt her friend's lips press against hers, noticing the softness of their touch. She froze from surprise.

     Pinkie urged her to continue. This was what she wanted, what she always had, why was she having such a hard time giving in? Pinkie Pie cleared the black vines of her brain and, finally, accepted another being into her life.

     She breathed out another sigh, one for her troubles, as she leaned into Rainbow, returning the kiss. Rainbow was sweet and refreshing, like mint and fresh rain. Pinkie was also sweet, like vanilla and cinnamon.

     Rainbow Dash absorbed the sweet flavor of Pinkie's mouth, losing herself in the even sweeter aroma of her mane. She allowed her eyes to slide closed as she entwined her tongue with Pinkie's, caressing her from the inside.

     A tiny whimper escaped Pinkie as Rainbow kissed her. It couldn't have been more perfect; she could freeze the moment right now, and carry it with her for the rest of her days.

     The adorable tiny sound that Pinkie released pushed Rainbow Dash to the edge. She pulled from the kiss and moved to Pinkie's jaw and throat, placing delicate butterfly kisses as she went. Not a word was exchanged by the two, nor did it have to.

     Rainbow nipped and kissed at Pinkie's throat while her hands roamed down her body, playing with her soft pink coat. Every kiss drew another whimper from the mare beneath her, only spurring Rainbow to kiss her again. One of Pinkie's hooves found Rainbow's mane, running through the silky hair before hooking under her front leg and around her back in a close embrace. A shiver traveled down Rainbow's spine as the same hoof played gently woth the feathers of her erect wings, teasing each one. Still, not a word was said.

     Rainbow moved back up Pinkie's jawline, allowing them to reconnect at the lips. She allowed her hoof to roam as well, inspired by Pinkie's, which was now massaging the base of her wings, sending ripples of pleasure down Rainbow's spine. The pegasus traced over Pinkie's sides, rumpling her fur, before meeting at her thigh. With a gentle nudged, Rainbow asked permission to be let inside, permission the Pinkie granted.

     Her hoof met Pinkie's warmth as she gently ran along it. Pinkie whimpered again into Rainbow's mouth, this time sounding more desperate. Rainbow smiled into the kiss before moving her hoof again, centering on the specific spot that sent shockwaves of pleasure shooting through Pinkie's body, and moving it in circles. Pinkie squealed into the kiss which Rainbow was determined not to break as she increased the pressure with which she rubbed Pinkie Pie.

     All the while, Pinkie's hoof had never left her friend's wings, stroking steadily up and down their length. Every stroke sent a spike of pleasure through Rainbow, connecting directly to her dripping marehood. She didn't mind the teasing; she wanted nothing more than to please Pinkie Pie, as there would be plenty of time for herself later.

     Finally breaking the kiss, Rainbow wasted no time in moving down Pinkie Pie's body, kissing her soft coat as she did so. She centered herself over her friend's heat. A little lick drew a squeal from Pinkie Pie, and that was all Rainbow needed to hear. She dove in, kissing the spot at the tip of Pinkie's marehood, sucking gently as she did so. Pinkie moaned, a sweet, sugary moan that Rainbow was desperate to hear again and again.

     She sped up her pace, flicking her tongue rapidly around her clit as her hooves gripped Pinkie's cutie mark, holding her hips steady while the rest of her body squirmed. The pink mare moaned and moaned, every moan like a gift to Rainbow, wrapped up in a pretty package just for her. She continued her ministration, desperately rubbing at Pinkie's clitoris until, without warning, the pink mare clenched up.

     She let out a squeal then a long moan as fluid pounded out of her body in time with the contractions of her orgasm. Pinkie felt her mind cave in on itself, coherent thought beaten away by fiery pleasure as it consumed her, replacing the blood in her veins with adrenaline. She moaned softly in time with the pulses of orgasm, gripping Rainbow's head, never letting her go.

     Rainbow licked her lips and pulled away, resting her head on Pinkie's heaving tummy as she felt a hoof stroke her mane. She did not mind the lack of reciprocation, just being here with the mare she loved was enouh. Pinkie drew Rainbow's face to hers and planted a kiss on her lips, gentler than before, but with the same amount of passion below the surface.

     A bulb lit dimly in Rainbow's head as she remembered the party she was entrusted in bringing Pinkie back to. She wouldn't have minded missing it, staying here with Pinkie forever, were it not for her suspicious friends.

     As Pinkie's breathing quieted, she stood shakily, finally ready to leave with Rainbow. She surveyed the dismal party scene before her, inanimate objects and an almost inanimate alligator that had once been her truest friends. Pinkie felt sunshine seep through her from the inside; Pinkamena seemed like a distant memory, the paramount of years of stowed anger and sorrow, hardened into a ball of steely hatred that she swore to never see again.

     Pinkie's thoughts were broken by pegasus approaching her, brushing a strand of furiously curly hair from her eyes. Rainbow pulled Pinkie into another embrace, hugging her tightly and gently stroking her mane, allowing her friend to shed a single tear onto her coat. The very last tear.

     "Everything will be alright."

*~*~*

     The sound of the ocean dragged through her ears as a deep breath tasted the crisp sweetness of the air. Light played across the surface of her lids like little yellow sprites, beckoning for her to join them.

     Waves rolled up and down the beach, pulling sand away each time they receded, leaving a smoot surface in their wake. Pinkie could feel the ocean foam around her hooves as she stood at the brim, wrapping herself in the cotton candy sweetness around her, breathing deeply.

     She felt clear as a pond, light as a feather. Every breath expelled her troubles, letting them dissolve into nothingness. The ocean would grab them and pull them away, where the setting orange sun would swallow them up.

     Pinkie opened her eyes, losing herself in the glowing orb as it slid over the horizon. The irresistable urge to follow it struck her again. She wanted to chase the sun forever, stay forever in its light, never get left in the darkness.

     She hung her head. Her hoof would not move, of course, she was bound to the land. A sigh escaped again, this time from a deeper place than those before it. Another whisper played around Pinkie's ear, soothing her.

     Everything will be alright.

     Pinkie breathed again as she watched the sun sink down even further. Not this time. She wouldn't let the light leave this time.

     Her hoof lifted from the ground, light as can be. With a gentle step, Pinkie moved into the ocean, letting the warm water swallow her up. Another step and she was completely enveloped.

     The water kissed her and hugged her like a cradle, carrying her on its shoulders as Pinkie drifted. She let out a final sigh and let go, letting her worries wash into the foam.

     As the sun set, Pinkie followed it, never letting it go.

*~*~*