Twilight Sparkle is an Assassin

by thedarkitty

Rating: mature
Tags: Gore, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, Alternate Universe, Romance, Princess Luna, Trixie, Comedy, Random, Adventure, Princess Celestia, Sex, Sunset Shimmer, Twilight Sparkle
Length: 7600

Meet Twilight Sparkle, the deadliest, not to mention, cutest and most adorable assassin in Equestria.

Celestia is travelling to the Griffon kindom in the hopes of bringing their counterpart kindom closer together in friendship. During her perilous travels she comes face to face with bandits, sleeps in an inhospitable village, and finally comes to her destination. But after all this, is the griffon king willing to make friends with ponies? If not, well at least Celestia bought her most formidable assassin with her. Twilight Sparkle.

Edit: This story is meant to be ironically funny. It will contain moments of seriousness, but mostly it's focused on the cutness and adorableness of the most cutest and adorable pony. Twilight Sparkle.Pictures I based Twi's personality on

Published 2015-12-17 17:50:01 UTC
Last updated 2016-09-21 23:18:38 UTC

A Very Adorable Assassin Indeed.

“Are we nearly there yet?” Twilight Sparkle asked, for perhaps the tenth time in just as many minutes. Celestia gritted her teeth and resisted the urge to let loose a loud sigh of annoyance. Instead she just glared down at her student who was dressed in white robes, which did a pretty good job at concealing the arsenal of weapons strapped around her body.

“For the millionth time, Twilight!” Celestia snapped angrily. “We are not almost there! In fact, we still have quite a long way to go before we reach the griffon kingdom! So please, stop bothering me with these pointless questions!”

Twilight’s ears folded back against her head and her bottom lip began trembling as she looked up at her princess with wide watery eyes filled with hurt. Celestia mentally berated herself for snapping at her young student in such a harsh tone, but they had been on the road—traveling to the griffon kingdom—for the past three days now, her aching hooves and Twilight’s constant whining was getting on her already worn nerves.

But that was still no excuse for her to take her frustrations out on her assassin. “Forgive me, Twilight. This whole trip has stretched my patience to its limit. First the carriage breaks down beyond repair, even after I specifically told the servants to make sure it was up to making a long journey across Equestria. Then we have to hoof it the rest of the way to the Griffon kingdom, lest we offend them by being late. And to top it all off, I can’t even teleport us there, because of the age-old tradition of traveling by hoof or carriage all the way to peace conferences.” Celestia let out another frustrated sigh, but most of her frustrations melted away as Twilight’s expression turned to one of understanding and the unicorn used her fuzzily soft muzzle to nuzzle Celestia’s chest.

“It’s okay, Princess,” Twilight said comfortingly. “I promise not to bother you again.”

Celestia smiled down at the smaller mare and gave her pat on the head, causing Twilight to purr softly in contentment.

“How about the next village we come to, I treat you to some milk and cookies?”

Twilight’s eyes lit up brightly and she gave a elated “squee” before jumping in happy circles around her mentor.

“YES! YES! YES! YES! YES! YES! YES! YES! YES! YES!”

For several amusement filled seconds, Celestia watched her assassin prance adorably in excited circles at the prospect of cookies and milk before placing a wing in Twilight’s path. Twilight’s joyful prancing came to an abrupt stop as she ran into Celestia’s wing, the mare let out a small sneeze as she got a face full of feathers. Twilight then looked up at Celestia with a sheepish smile.

“Heh-heh... I suppose I got a bit over excited.”

Celestia nodded. “Just a bit,” she said, agreeing. “Now why don’t you go scout the path ahead and make sure it’s safe to proceed? We don’t want to run into any bandits lying in wait for us, now do we?”

“Okay princess.” Twilight gave her a wide smile before using her magic to draw two sais from
her robes and walk on ahead.

Twilight hummed a happy tune to herself as she scanned the forest and bushes on both sides of the path for any kind of threats to her beloved princess. Occasionally she’d glance back the way she’d come to make sure nothing had happened to her mentor, and then return to eyeing the track ahead of her for any dangers. The sais in her telekinetic grasp spun in lazy circles at her sides, as she found fiddling with them to be an amusing entertainment.

Twilight came to a cautious stop when she heard a rustling noise in a bush several meters in front of her.. Her ears pricked forward to catch any other noises coming from the bush, while her eyes flickered to different places in the surrounding landscape, looking for anything that might be sneaking up on her. All was silent so she moved cautiously forward in a low crouch to the ground, with her sais pointed threateningly at the bush.

The bush rustled again, causing Twilight to give out a startled ‘eep’ and jump backwards, before blasting it with a powerful stream of violet magic. Leaves and twigs flew everywhere and in the remains of the bush a nest of angry snakes came slithering towards her.

Twilight screamed loudly in pure terror and began running away as fast as she possibly could.

Princess Celestia was a very welcome sight to Twilight, who didn’t stop running until she was clutching her mentor’s foreleg as though it was her lifeline. Celestia looked down at the quivering mare holding onto her leg and immediately used her magic to bring Twilight into a comforting hug. Twilight wrapped her hooves around the alicorn’s neck and buried her muzzle into Celestia’s chest.

“Let me guess,” Celestia said softly. “You ran into some snakes?”

Twilight whimpered and nodded in reply.

Celestia ran a comforting hoof through Twilight’s mane while she nuzzled her cheek softly

“How about this time I protect you for a while, okay Twilight?”

Twilight gave a little sniffle and looked up at Celestia with wide, frightened eyes. “C-can I ride on your back? P-please?”

“Of course, my little pony.” Celestia’s horn glowed and she levitated Twilight onto her back in the space between her wings. Twilight snuggled further into her teacher’s warm fur, before she curled up into a small fuzzy ball and stared fearfully down at the ground.

She may be scared to death of snakes, but she still had to be vigilant in her protection of Equestria’s ruler. No snake was going to harm Celestia when Twilight Sparkle was around. As they approached the remains of the bush where the snakes had been hiding, Twilight used her magic to collect her fallen sais and point them threateningly at the ground ready to stab any slithering reptiles, if any dare to approach them.

Thankfully they made it past the danger zone without any trouble, but Celestia made no action to remove Twilight from her perch on her back. Twilight, who was completely oblivious to the small blush forming on her mentor’s cheeks, was quite happy to continue snuggling on Celestia’s back, and to make good use of this vantage point to keep an eye out for anything suspicious.

After several more hours of walking, during which Twilight was constantly yawning, Celestia was beginning to silently curse the idiots that made up the tradition of not using magic to got to peace treaty meetings. Her hooves were aching much worse than before, and her white fur was stained brown with dust. Oh how she missed the carriage.

“I’m hungry,” Twilight said, poking Celestia in the back to get her attention.

“I suppose we could stop and rest for a few minutes. Goodness knows we’ve earned it.”

Celestia levitated Twilight from her back and placed her gently onto the ground. Twilight gave another wide yawn and stretched out her stiff body much like a cat would.“So what would you like to eat today, Twilight?” Celestia levitated her saddle bags off and began taking various items out of them. “We have some carrot sticks, some apples, a few slices of bread, that are somehow still okay... I really think I should talk to the bakers about what they’re putting into their recipes.”

A thoughtful look passed over Celestia’s face. “I think we actually passed some daffodil flowers not too far back. How would you feel about a daffodil sandwich?”

Twilight’s stomach rumbled loudly and she gave an embarrassed smile while her purple cheeks took on a slightly redder shade. “That would be delicious, thank you princess.”

“Very well you stay here and set up the picnic blanket, I’ll go back and pick some of the
daffodils, okay?”

Twilight nodded, and when Celestia left, she levitated the blanket out of one of the saddle bags and began spreading it out on the ground. As she worked at setting up the picnic, Twilight hummed a quiet little tune to herself, and gave a satisfied nod once she had finished setting up the blanket.

“Well, well, well. What do we have here, lads?”

Twilight gasped, and suddenly spun around drawing her two sais to point them at three bandits, who were slowly walking out of the forest towards her with their own weapons.

She gulped nervously, and began backing away. “P-please, leave me alone,” Twilight said, looking at the bandits with wide, pleading eyes. “I-I don’t want to hurt you.”

The three bandits glanced at each other, then burst out laughing. Twilight’s flank bumped into a tree, stopping her backwards retreat. She gulped again as she realized that she had nowhere else to run. All the while the bandits kept moving in on her.

“What are ya even wearing?” one of the bandits asked, reaching his spear towards her white outfit. Twilight flinched away from the sharp weapon.

“And what’s a nice little filly like you playing with such sharp and nasty weapons like those, huh? Didn’t your mommy ever teach you it’s dangerous to play with knives?”

“They’re not knives!” Twilight pointed out with an angry huff. “They’re sais. And I have them because I’m an assassin!”

The three bandits began laughing even harder. “You, an assassin?! HAHAHAHA! What are ya gonna do? Give us a heart attack with your adorable cuteness?”

“Hey! Who you calling cute‽” Twilight stomped a hoof, sending up a small cloud of dust. “I happen to the be the most feared assassin in all of Equestria!”

More loud bursts of laughter. “Not surprising, with how many ponies you’ve no doubt killed with heart attacks!”

Twilight’s ears drooped, and she looked at the bandits with wide purple eyes shining with unshed tears. “B-but I am an assassin...” She sniffled sadly and ran the back of her hoof across her suddenly runny nose. “I-I even protect Princess Celestia. Which means I can’t let you take her things.”

Without warning Twilight disappeared In a flash of violet magic—which left the bandits’ vision blurry—and reappeared several feet in the air above the bandit in the middle of the group. Her sais—surrounded by a purple glow—shot downwards and stabbed the other two bandits in the back of their necks. She landed on the thirds bandit’s back, and jabbed him in the throat with a dart coated in Night Charm poison.

He’d be sleeping for hours.

Twilight hopped off the bandit’s back and blew a raspberry at his still form splayed out over the ground. “Told you I was an assassin.”

The one where Trixie and Luna join the group!

After recovering her sais, and using one of the dead bandit’s coats to wipe the blood off of them, she collected some rope from her saddlebags and tied up the bandit she had put to sleep. She then hid the other bandit’s bodies in the forest where they wouldn’t be found, or stumbled across by travelers any time soon.

With the dead bodies now well hidden away, and her prisoner secured, Twilight began dragging the unconscious bandit’s body back to the picnic blanket.

“You’re gonna be in big trouble when I tell the princess you tried to rob us.” Twilight said rather sternly.

The bandit remained silent, so Twilight left him slumped against a nearby tree and went back to humming a cheerful tune as she set up the rest of the picnic.

“Honestly, Celestia, We have no idea what the problem is!”

“The problem is, Luna, you broke tradition by teleporting here!”

Twilight looked up at the sound of Celestia and Luna’s voices approaching down the track they had come, her muzzle breaking out in a happy smile at the sight of the Night Princess. With an even happier ‘squee’ Twilight bounded up to her.

“Oh for the love of...”

Whatever Luna was about to say was lost as Twilight jumped up and wrapped her forelegs around the princess’s neck and began eagerly nuzzling her.

“Princess Luna! Why didn’t you tell us you were coming?”

Luna giggled at the ticklish sensations she was receiving from Twilight’s fuzzy muzzle assaulting every inch of her face and neck it could reach.

“‘Twas a spur of the moment decision, Twilight Sparkle. And is it just us, or have thee gotten more adorably cute since the last time we saw thee.”

Twilight gave a little whine of displeasure, and booped Luna on the nose.

“I’m not adorable, or cute! I’m mean and fearsome! So mean in fact, I ate the last of the cookies before we left without sharing any! And so fearsome I scared a kitten up a tree!”

“D’awwwwwww!” Luna cooed, using her magic to levitate Twilight to the ground where she pinned the smaller mare on her back.

“‘Twas very naughty of thee, Twilight. And thou knowest what happens to naughty fillies that steal cookies and scare kittens.”

Twilight’s eyes widened in fear and she began trying to squirm away from the smirking Princess.

“They get tickled!”

“Princess Celestia! Help!”

But it was too late for Twilight, as Luna began using her hooves and wingtips to mercilessly tickle her exposed belly. She began laughing uncontrollably and tried to curl up to protect her sensitive belly, but Luna’s magic kept her helplessly exposed. Twilight squealed loudly as Luna lowered her head and began giving her tummy loud raspberries.

“Stop!” Twilight pleaded, trying to shove Luna’s hooves away. “I can’t take it anymore!”

“No mercy!” Lune declared, redoubling her tickling efforts.

Thankfully, Celestia soon took pity on her poor assassin, and rescued Twilight from Luna’s clutches. Twilight immediately darted underneath her mentor and poked her tongue out at Luna, who returned the gesture.

“Must you keep tormenting Twilight? She’s supposed to be on duty right now, and having you distract her from that is not wise, especially this close to the Griffon Kingdom’s border. Speaking of duties, where is your assassin, sister?”

Luna sighed and began walking down the path, to the place where the picnic was set up.

“Trixie is hiding around here somewhere. She is still determined to get the drop on Twilight, one of these days.”

At the mention of Trixie’s name, Twilight began carefully scanning the bushes and tree tops for Luna’s escort. It was a game the two of them played whenever they went out into the field, and one Twilight had yet to lose.

Celestia chuckled lightly at her student’s antics. “Well, Twilight didn’t become the most deadliest assassin in Equestria by being easy to sneak up on. I fear Trixie will be hard pressed to...”

“Actually,” Twilight said, blushing brightly and not being able to meet any of the princesses’ gazes, “I accidentally dropped my guard when I was setting up the picnic and some bandits took me by surprise.”

Twilight latched onto her princess’s leg and looked up at Celestia with worried, pleading eyes.

“I’m really, really, really sorry Princess. Please don’t fire me! I promise it won’t happen again!”

Celestia leaned down and gave Twilight—her friend and guardian—a reassuring nuzzle. “We all make mistakes sometimes, my little assassin. The best thing we can do is learn from them and not to repeat them.”

Twilight sucked in a deep, calming breath and smiled up at her princess. “I will learn from this, princess. From now on, my head is on a swivel! Speaking of which, I got a certain assassin to hunt down before she gets me.”

Twilight was about to slink into the forest, but she suddenly stopped and turned back to Celestia.

“Thank you for not firing me!” she called out, before slipping away into the bushes.

As soon as Twilight was out of sight, Celestia led the way back to where the picnic blanket was set up,.The two princesses only gave the bound unconscious bandit a cursory glance before settling down.

“Something is bothering you, Luna,” Celestia observed as she made sandwiches with the daffodils she’d picked. “Ever since I brought up Trixie’s name you’ve been... distant. You hid it well, but I noticed it nonetheless.”

Luna sighed and began chewing on one of the carrots. “We are worried about Trixie. She’s been acting rather... umm... odd? It started a few months ago, when she came back from the mission in the Crystal Empire, and it’s only been getting worse ever since.”

“Odd, in what way?”

“Well, she doesn’t talk to us as much as she used to, and whenever we strike up conversation, she merely gives us vague, incomprehensive replies. W-We don’t think she enjoys our company anymore.”

Luna let out a heavy sigh and began fiddling with a loose thread on the picnic blanket. “We are not sure what we did wrong to warrant her coldness.” A sniffle. “We miss our snuggles, and chats, and our play fights. Oh Tia, what do we do? We don’t want to replace her, but if she’s not able to communicate with us and trust us completely...”

Celestia moved close to her worried, younger, sibling and draped a wing over her. “The bond between a princess and her personal assassin is a very close one, it’s that bond of complete trust and honesty between us, that allows us to work so well together. If that bond ever becomes compromised, than you must do everything in your power to strengthen and repair it. Have a talk with Trixie, Luna, and fix whatever it is that has affected your special bond.”

“Thou art right, sister,” Luna said with a resolute nod. “As soon as Trixie returns we will talk with her. Thankest thou for pointing us in the right direction, dear sister.”

Twilight Sparkle examined her environment with a keen, eagle-like, awareness. She was looking for anything that was out of place in the forest. A broken twig, a piece of fabric, even a smell, just anything that would give her a clue as to where her adversary was.

And her adversary was certainly a cunning one, after all, it had taken all her skills and cunning to stay one step ahead of Trixie, and still, she had some very close calls.

Twilight’s ears twitched in the direction of a new sound out of place, and she could have sworn she glimpsed a flicker of Trixie’s blue cape. Moving more quietly than ghost, Twilight slid from her hiding place inside a bush and began taking a parallel course to intercept the glimpse of blue she had spotted.

As she walked, her gaze was constantly glancing in different directions, trying to spot any traps or ambushes Trixie may have planted for her. Though she did have to resist humming her happy tune, this mission was all about stealth and sneakiness.

Another tiny noise alerted her to the fact that she was getting closer to her target, so she ducked into another bush to hide while she considered her options.

Trixie was no doubt giving her just enough clues and signs to make sure she stayed on her trail, without being too obvious about it. It had been Twilight herself that had taught Trixie that particular skill, so she recognized it as easily as she recognized her own adorable reflection in the mirror.

But there was one thing Twilight could never be sure of. And that was if Trixie had modified or altered the trick to lull her into a false sense of security. If that was the case, Twilight knew she was going to have to be extra vigilant and sneaky, if she wanted to keep her perfect record of never being tagged by a fellow assassin. Biting her lip in concentration, Twilight considered her options.

Option one was to continue what she was doing and when Trixie sprung her trap, fight to the best of her ability to win.

Option two was to stay where she was and wait until Trixie found her. This option came with the option of preparing her own traps and ambushes, but there was always the chance Trixie could get her while she was working.

So she was going to have to go with the third, and what she felt was the best option: modify and adapt the skills she had taught Trixie, and do the unpredictable.

Twilight glanced around her surroundings and levitated herself to a nearby tree branch. From up here she had a much better vantage point to observe her environment, and after a few minutes of searching she spotted Trixie hiding in some nearby bushes fixing up a cross-bow trap.

A smile formed on Twilight’s muzzle as she drew a small dart clean of any poisons or potions and used her magic to send it flying towards the blue and white clad assassin.

Trixie gave a startled yelp as something sharp pricked her side and then gave small groan as she recognized it as one of Twilight’s darts. With an angry glare set on her face, Trixie followed the dart’s flight path until she saw Twilight waving happily at her from a tree top.

Twilight teleported, and moments later, Trixie was tackled to the ground and being happily nuzzled to death.

“Oh, I missed you so much, Trixie! And I can’t wait to catch up with everything that’s been going on.” Twilight continued assaulting Trixie with her enthusiastic nuzzles. “I heard you went on a mission to the Crystal Empire. What’d you do there?”

“Twilight?” Trixie said.

“Did you have to kill anypony?”

“Twilight,” Trixie repeated.

“How’s Sunset Shimmer?”

“Twilight.”

“Did you ever end up telling Luna about your secret crush on her?”

“TWILIGHT!”

Twilight stopped nuzzling Trixie’s neck and blinked up at the mare in surprise. “Yes, Trixie?”

“Trixie kindly requests that you remove yourself from her personage, and she also wishes for you to remove your dart from her flank.”

Twilight promptly scampered away from Trixie with a confused and slightly hurt look. “D-did I do something wrong, Trixie?”

Trixie gave a frustrated huff, which turned to a pained squeak as she used her magic to pull the dart from her flank. “Trixie is just not in the mood for your antics! And she kindly reminds you that she doesn’t have a crush on her princess!”

Twilight snickered and began helping her fellow assassin to remove the now unnecessary traps. “If that were true, then how come I keep catching you staring at her flank? Or why you get so tongue-tied when you’re around her?”

Trixie’s cheeks burned crimson as she stared dejectedly at the ground. “Trixie is not saying that it’s true, Trixie is just pointing out that if she did have a crush on her princess, there is simply no way for it to work out.”

Twilight sidled up to Trixie and gave her a soft cuddle. “Don’t say that, Trixie. I’ve read about plenty of assassins throughout history who fell in love with their princess’s, most of the time their relationships worked out quite well. But it will only work out if you’re willing to let Luna know how you feel.”

Trixie met Twilight’s gaze and sniffled back a few tears. “B-but what if Luna doesn’t approve of Trixie’s feelings, then Luna will fire Trixie, and Trixie will…”

Twilight placed a hoof against Trixie’s mouth before she could complete her sentence and stared intently into her eyes. “Tell Luna how you feel, or she’ll eventually figure it out when she catches you staring at her moon-covered flanks.”

Trixie’s blush grew brighter and she looked away from Twilight. “T-Trixie does not stare at her amazing moon-covered flanks.”

Twilight giggled and booped Trixie on the nose. “If only I had a cookie every time you said that.”

“Trixie is going back to Luna now, and she suggests you get back to your own princess.”

Twilight’s horn glowed, and in a flash of violet light, they teleported to where the picnic blanket had been set up.

Luna gave Trixie a warm smile and wave, causing her to blush slightly and look away. Luna’s smile dropped and she glanced at Celestia, who gave her an encouraging nod.

“Trixie,” Luna said, standing up. “We wish to talk with thee in private before we continue on our journey.”

Without waiting for assassin’s reply, Luna turned and began walking further down the path, where their conversation wouldn’t be overheard by Twilight or Celestia.

Trixie and Twilight exchanged worried glances, and Twilight nudged her in the shoulder, encouraging Trixie to trot after Luna. Twilight had to resist giggling when she noticed Trixie’s gaze following the Night Princess’s swaying flanks.

“This is far enough.” Luna came to a sudden stop, and it was only Trixie’s cat-like reflexes that saved her from colliding with Luna’s full moon.

Trixie nervously gulped and forced herself to back further away from the hypnotic sight of Luna’s flanks before her Princess caught her staring. But there was no way for Trixie to hide her blushing face, no matter how hard she tried.

“Why doest thou look away from us, Trixie Lulamoon? Have we done something to offend thee in any way?”

Trixie’s mouth suddenly felt drier than desert sand and she forced herself to look up into Luna’s amazing light-blue eyes, she soon found herself so lost in them she had to look away lest she become a drooling mess. “Y-you haven’t done anything to offend Trixie.”

“Then why are thou acting like we are the plague? Or something else equally unpleasant and unworthy of thy attentions!”

Trixie gave a quiet whimper when she heard Luna say that. She couldn’t believe Luna would suggest, or even consider herself something unworthy of Trixie’s attention. She wanted nothing more than to hug and nuzzle her princess and give her all the loving attention Luna deserved, but she couldn’t risk Luna becoming annoyed or displeased with her.

“We have thought long and hard about this decision, Trixie Luluamoon, and we have decided that unless thou tells us why thou have been ignoring us for the past few moons, then we shall have no choice but to remove thee from thy position of royal assassin.”

Trixie whimpered louder at the possibility she would lose the job and the mare she was in love with. She gazed up at Luna with wide desperate eyes. “T-Trixie is sorry you feel as though she has been ignoring you. And Trixie wishes to assure you that was never her intentions.” Another whimper escaped from Trixie as she realized she’d have to finally admit the feelings of affection she had towards Luna. She wished with all her soul that this relationship between an assassin and her princess would be one of the ones that worked out. With a shaky breath, Trixie gestured for luna to move closer, and with one smooth and graceful motion she wrapped her forelegs around Luna’s neck bought her princess into a soft but sincere kiss.

Luna’s eyes widened as Trixie kissed her on the lips, and for several long moments her mind was a whirlwind of panic. Then everything clicked into place as she realized Trixie hadn’t been ignoring her to be spiteful, but because she was trying to conceal her feelings of affection. With that realization, the anxiety and worry she had been feeling for the past few months melted away with the warm fuzzy feeling growing in her heart.

Trixie went to move away, but Luna pulled her closer and deepened the kiss. Trixie gave a surprised squeak, which was quickly silenced as Luna poked her tongue into Trixie’s mouth and wrestled her tongue into submission. It had been far too long since she had a personal assassin for a consort, and Luna missed that type of special and closely intimate relationship. Several moments later, Luna’s eyes widened as Trixie began fighting back until it was her tongue that was dominating the kiss.

Trixie didn’t hesitate, nor did she take any quarter as her tongue invaded and explored every inch of Luna’s mouth, and after several more moments of pure bliss, Luna pulled back, a string of saliva connecting their muzzles. Trixie stared up in confusion at her Princess who was smiling down at her.

“S-so you’re not angry with Trixie?”

Luna giggled and pulled her assassin into tight hug, nuzzling her neck. “We are not angry with thee. In fact We are quite pleased and excited to explore a relationship with our assassin.” Luna planted another soft kiss on Trixie’s lips. “What took thee so long to finally admit thy true feelings for us?”

Trixie smiled and softly nuzzled Luna’s cheek. “Trixie guesses your fearless assassin is not as fearless as you think.”

Tickles, Snacks and Cookies.

Twilight watched Luna walk away into the forest with her assassin following meekly behind her, and she giggled noticing Trixie’s love filled gaze staring at the hypnotic sway of the Night Princess’s flanks. She always found it extremely amusing how easy it was for Trixie to become completely enchanted by Luna’s cutie mark area. Twilight’s amusement was something Celestia immediately picked up on, and the princess glared suspiciously down at her assassin-who was trying her best not to burst out in laughter-but couldn’t for the life of her think of anything that was supposed to be funny.

“What do you find so amusing, Twilight? Surely not the fact that Trixie may lose her position as Luna’s royal assassin?”

Twilight immediately clamped her mouth shut and bit down on her tongue to prevent any other giggles from her muzzle. “N-nothing?” she weakly denied. But it was clear from Celestia’s skeptically raised eyebrow that the princess wasn’t believing her.

“Surely you were taught how to lie better than that during your classes on interrogation .”

“Nothing,” Twilight said with more conviction. “I found absolutely nothing amusing.” If it weren’t for the corner of Twilight’s mouth occasionally twitching upwards, Celestia would have almost believed her young student. But she knew Twilight too well for the young assassin to successfully lie to her. Celesta’s suspicious glare deepened, causing Twilight to fidget nervously, and she couldn’t meet the princess’s gaze. She hated lying to her princess, but she wasn’t going to reveal Trixie’s secret crush no matter what happened to her.

“Are you going to tell me the truth, Twilight?” Celestia stepped closer to Twilight lighting her horn with magic and trapping her whole body in her golden aura. “Or do I have to resort to more... Drastic measures?” Twilight gave a small whimper of fear, and tried to hide her guilt filled expression behind her mane. This was just like the time Celestia had questioned her about the freshly baked cookies that suspiciously kept going missing from the royal kitchen. She hadn’t lasted long during that interrogation either.

“Last chance for you to talk, Twilight. What did you find so amusing about Trixie and luna?”

Twilight gritted her teeth and met the princess’s stern gaze. “I shall never talk!”

“Very well. Let the tickle torture begin.”

Celestia plucked a feather from one of her wings and Twilight gave a terrified squeak watching with dread filled eyes as the feather drifted closer and closer to her face, and when it finally touched her muzzle she let out a little sneeze before bursting into uncontrollable giggles. Her giggles echoed loudly through the forest when the feather’s ticklish touch began running over every inch of her exposed face, but no matter how ticklish she was, she would not reveal Trixie’s secret. But Twilight’s resolve greatly softened when Celestia levitated her into the air, and exposed each of her hooves for the feather-guided by her magic-to begin tickling.

“It’s only going to get worse from here on out, my little assassin.” Celestia grinned with amusement. “Are you sure you want me to continue?” The still giggling unicorn gave a loud whimper and began to squirm in the princess’s magic holding her prisoner in an feeble attempt to escape from the tickling torment.

“Very well.” Celestia said, after waiting for several moments for Twilight to start talking. She lifted the front of Twilight’s white robes to expose her belly, and she took a moment to admire its pudgy cuteness before assaulting it with raspberries and nuzzles, just as she sent the feather back to work running over every inch of her hoof, and muzzle. Twilight’s laughter grew louder at the these new sensations, and tears streamed down her face from laughing so hard. She tried to beg and plead for Celestia to stop tickling her, but she was laughing too much to form any coherent words.

“Are you ready to talk now, Twilight?”

“N-n-n-never!” she squealed loudly.

Celestia’s wings flared open and joined the tickle torture alternating between rubbing along Twilight’s chest, and her other exposed hooves. After several more minutes of enduring Celestia’s tickle torture, Twilight’s sides were starting to hurt from laughing so much and she couldn’t take it anymore.

“O-o-okay, I-I-I’ll tell you! J-j-just please no more tickles!”

Celestia immediately stopped tickling Twilight and after she had caught her breath she gave her assassin an expectant look. “Well, are you going to explain yourself?”

“I-I was laughing because...” She hesitated for several more moments still not wanting to expose Trixie’s secret crush on Luna. But she finally broke when Celestia drifted the feather back to one of her hooves. “Trixie has a crush on Luna and I was laughing because I caught her staring at Luna’s flanks!”

Celestia’s eyes widened at this revelation, and she glanced back down the path that her sister had lead Trixie down. If history was anything to go by, they were more than likely going to make out as soon as Luna found out her assassin’s true her feelings towards her. She gently placed Twilight back on the ground and used her magic to straighten out her scrunched up robes.

“How long have you known about this, Twilight?”
“Ummmm...” Twilight looked away from her mentor’s narrowed gaze. “A-a while...”
“And just how long is a while?”
“T-the past three m-months.”

Celestia gave a very unamused huff and sat down on her haunches fixing Twilight with a slightly annoyed glare. “Why would you keep something like this a secret from me, Twilight? Luna is my younger sister, I feel I deserve to know these things about her.”

Twilight bit her bottom lip and looked guiltily down at the ground. “I-I promised Trixie I wouldn’t tell anypony about her secret crush on Luna.” She rushed over to Celestia and wrapped her forelegs around her neck before burying her muzzle into the princess’s soft chest fur. “Please, please don’t be mad at me anymore! I’m really, really sorry I kept this from you!”

“It’s perfectly fine, Twilight.” Celestia said and gave the top of Twilight’s mane a nuzzle before unfurling a wing and trapping her assassin, in a tight cacoon of protection and reassurance. “No real harm was done, and my sister’s bond with her Trixie will no doubt be stronger than it ever was before.”

Twilight purred softly in contentment at the affection and she nuzzled Celestia’s chest enjoying her princess’s comforting and reassuring embrace of warm and silky soft feathers.

They stayed in their embrace for several moments until Twilight’s stomach rumbled and she looked up at Celestia with a slight blush forming on her cheeks. “Can I please have that daffodil sandwich, princess?”

“Of course,” Celestia said, and with Twilight still tucked snugly under her wing, she shifted into a more comfortable position and began using her magic to cut the loaf of bread, and pick the petals off of the daffodils she had picked earlier. With wide hungry eyes, Twilight watched Celestia work at constructing her favourite sandwich, and with a whimper of hunger she tried to sneak one of the flowers. Celestia tutted and levitated the bouquet of daffadils out of her assassin’s reach.

“Be patient Twilight,” Celestia chided softly. “Your sandwich is almost done. In the mean time, mind telling me why that pony over there is tied up.”

Twilight glanced at the bandit she had captured and gave him a dirty glare. “He was one of the bandits that sneaked up on me. I thought you might want to interrogate him on how many other bandits are operating in this area of Equestria so we can put a stop to any other bandit operations. ”

Celestia added the finishing touches to Twilight’s daffodil sandwich-by removing the bread crust-and as soon it was ready for eating, Twilight squeed and pounced on it much like a cat catching its prey. With great enthusiasm she tore into the sandwich and chewed it with a look of absolute bliss on her crumb stained face.

The daffodil sandwich didn’t stand a chance against a hungry Twilight, and was absolutely massacred in a matter of seconds. Once Twilight was done eating, she gave a little burp and glanced at her royal company blushing brightly in self concisenesses. “Sorry you had to see that, princess, but I was really hungry.”

Celesta merely smiled and fluffed her feathers before using her magic to tuck Twilight back under her wing. “Would you like some carrot sticks now?” Twilight nodded her agreement and munched on the carrot snacks with much more civility.

“P-princess,” Twilight said after several moments. “C-can I ask you a question?”
“Of course, Twilight.”
“Can I have a cookie, now?”

“You can have your cookies tonight, Twilight, when we get to the next inn.”

Twilight gave an unamused huff, and began sulking. A cold wind began blowing in from the nearby coast, causing Twilight to shiver and snuggle further against Celestia’s body. The princess tried not to think about how perfectly her little assassin fit under her wing, and she turned away from the unicorn to hide the blush spreading across her cheeks. It was almost as though they were specifically made to go together like two pieces of a puzzle.

Twilight nudged Celestia’s stomach bringing her out of her musings. “So when are you going to interrogate the bandit? I can wake him up now if you want.”

“That won’t be necessary, my faithful student. I’ll just teleport him back to Canterlot with a note, as I think it would be best if I simply let the royal guards handle the interrogation. It’s too beautiful a day for such things.” A brief flare of Celestia’s magic caused a piece of parchment followed by a quill to float out of the supplies, and she began writing a note explaining she wanted the stallion questioned in regards to the bandit activity in the area. Once she was done, she tucked the note into the rope restraining the bandit, before he disappeared in a flash of golden light. “All done,” Celestia said. “And once Luna and Trixie get done with their romp in the hay, we can continue on with our journey.”
Twilight frowned in confusion. “Why would Trixie and Luna want to romp around in hay? Hay’s all itchy.”

Celestia smirked down at her innocent assassin. “Having a romp in the hay is a lot more fun then you think, Twilight. Especially at certain times of the year.”

“You have romps in the hay?” Twilight asked.

Celestia smirked to herself and used her magic to softly wipe the crumbs aways from Twilight’s face. “Occasionally, when I need to get rid of a bit of stress. Unfortunately being a ruler of Equestria means I often have to romp by myself, and always have to finish quickly.”
Twilight scooted closer to her princess and gave a nuzzle under the chin. “Don’t worry princess, if you ever want somepony to romp in hay with, you can always ask me, even if hay is all itchy.”

Celestia had to resist the strong urge to burst out laughing at Twilight’s innocent, yet oh so, naughty request. “I shall keep that offer in mind, Twilight.” Maybe one day she would be lucky enough to do that with her nearly constant companion. The sound of giggling greeted the two ponies ears and Twilight perked up when Luna and Trixie walked down the path towards them.

“Hello, Luna, Trixie,” Celestia greeted with a bit less warmth than she usually did.

Luna stopped giggling and looked at her sister with concern. “Is something the matter, dear sister.”

Celestia ruffled her feathers with agitation. “Of course not Luna. I am happy you’ve got a new special somepony to be with.”
Trixie hummed in contentment as Luna scratched behind her ear with her magic. “As are we, dear Sister.”

“Trixie agrees.” She said, purring softly at Luna’s attention.

Twilight grinned and walked up to Luna hugging her leg. “I’m glad Trixie finally admitted her true feelings for you.”

Celestia mumbled something and began clearing away the picnic blanket and food levitating several peices of carrot sticks and a daffodil sandwich to Trixie to eat while they travelled.

A golden aura enveloped Twilight’s body and she gave a little squeak as she was pulled back to Celestia. “I think it’s time we continued on with our journey, don’t you?”

“We still think thou should just teleport the rest of the way.” Luna said between mouthfuls of her sandwich.

“Trixie agrees. She doesn’t wish to be walking for hours.” She wiggled her flanks a little before pouncing onto Luna’s back curling up and purring as she went back to eating her lunch.

Celestia sighed and rolled her eyes. “We’re only a few more hours away from the Griffon border. Besides, there will no doubt be spies and sentries around. If they see us teleport and report we broke the tradition...” She trailed off as they all knew an offence to the proud griffons could start a war. Twilight also pounced onto Luna’s back curling up and pulling Trixie into a snuggling hug. They both purred loudly and snuggled into Celestia’s soft plumage as she draped a wing over her sister’s back covering their assassins with a warm wing. Luna gave a little coo of pleasure from the contact and snuggled further against Celestia enjoying the warmth and protection from the cool coastal air.
“Mmmmmmmm... Thankyou dear sister. We do so enjoy thine warmth.”

Trixie and Twilight both purred in agreement pulling Celestia’s wing closer to themselves and snuggled tighter together and yawning tiredly. Celestia chuckled and gave them each a nuzzle. “I think it’s time for some certain someponies to have their afternoon naps.”
The two assassins whined with displeasure. “But Trixie isn’t tired!”

“Neither am I!” Twilight agreed with a wide yawn. However both were soon peacefully sound asleep snuggled together under Celestia’s wing.

Several hours later the two royal sisters crested a hill and paused to take in the awe-inspiring view below them. Unlike Griffon Stone, this settlement was massive with houses building and shops stretching out in every direction. Alleyways and sidestreets formed an intricate hidden highway off of the main roads, Celestia and Luna looked at each other a silent message spoken between them. If they wanted to remain safe during this journey, they would need Twilight and Trixie’s help.

The two assassins whined in displeasue as they were shaken awake from their nap. Twilight blinked a few times as her eyes adjusted to the light and she pounced on Celestia’s back sitting down between her wings poking the back of her neck. “Cookies now!?” She asked eagerly. Trixie was instantly awake at the mention of cookies and she pounced into Luna’s mane leaning down to nuzzle at her new marefriend’s cheek.

“Trixie wants cookies too!”

A smirk flickered on Celestia’s muzzle as she lead the way down the hill and onto the road leading to the Griffon Kingdom. “Trixie, I am sure if you asked Luna nicely enough, she wouldn’t mind giving you her ‘cookie.’ isn’t that right, sister?” Trixie gave an excited ‘squee’, poking
relentlessly at Luna’s mane.

“Trixie wants your cookie! Please can Trixie have your cookie?!”

“Heeeeeeeeeeyyyyyyy!” Twilight pouted epically at Luna and Trixie from her perch on Celestia’s back. “If anypony deserves a cookie, it’s me!” She looked pleadingly into Luna’s eyes. “Can I have this cookie of yours?”

“Nooooooooooo!” Trixie possessively hugged her hooves around Luna’s neck holding her tight. “Luna’s cookie is Trixie’s!”

“But I’ve been looking forward to having a cookie ever since we left Canterlot!” Twilight protested, pointing an accusing hoof at Luna and Trixie. “You two merely teleported here!”

Celestia was fighting hard to contain her giggles at the uncomfortable, innuendo filled, position she had put her sister in. She couldn’t help but continuing her relentless teasing. “Please stop fighting, you two. Luna has only one ‘cookie’ and despite it being extremely special, it’s not worth two friends fighting over...”

“Trixie disagrees! Luna’s cookie is very worth fighting over! Especially if it a special one!”

Luna gritted her teeth and stared straight ahead, her cheeks flaming bright red.

Twilight gave a whine of displeasure, using her magic to poke at Luna’s shoulder. “How could you have kept this special cookie from us!”

Luna huffed using her own magic to swat away Twilight’s poking aura. “Our cookie is not anypony’s business but our own!” Trixie, with a massive smirk on her muzzle, leaned down and whispered something into Luna’s ear. Her blush brightened and she swatted Trixie’s nose with her magic.“Shush, you!” Before Celestia could poke anymore fun at her expanse she trotted several meters ahead along the path.

“So, no cookie yet?” Twilight inquired of Celestia.

Celestia gently stroked her, magic down Twilight’s back, causing her to purr softly. “When we get to the next inn, little pony."