Celestia's Bad Friends

“OW! OW! Hey babe-OW! I’m not usually-AGH! Up for these kinds of-OOF! Things until the-ARGH! Third date!” Proto-Excalibur cracked out as he was stomped, grabbed by a leg, and slammed around multiple times by an irate nude amazoness Nyx.

“SHUT UP YOU PERVERT!” Nyx screamed as she threw Proto-Excalibur down the hall with incredible strength, huffing and puffing at exerting herself to toss around a couple-hundred pound Tenno plus Warframe without a frame on herself. “I’m not some easy bitch you can just ask for sex asshole!”

“Wasn’t gonna!”

“LIAR! I HAVE PSYCHIC POWERS YOU IDIOT!”

“THEY’RE BROKEN!”

“STOP THINKING MY BOOBS ARE EQUIVALENT TO RHINO PRIME’S SHOULDERS!”

“STOP READING MY MIND!”

“Valkyr, since when was Nyx this strong?” Rhino Prime whispered as he leaned towards the squirming cat-themed Tenno.

“Probably since she got all that jiggly, sexy, shiny biomass back from her lost legs.” ‘Don’t pounce, don’t pounce, not yet, not yet.’

“That indeed makes sense. She has more mass to use for her own mobility. Also, look at her muscle definition!” Celestia pointed out with her armored hoof, making everyone notice the ripped muscle-shapes in Nyx’s form.

“Hm, I’ve heard that some Tenno’s biomass still has the genetic memory of their original state. Nyx must have been quite muscular before she lost her form’s stability.” Trinity mused, getting Artemis to hum as he rubbed a chin in supposition.

“Perhaps my Gender Bending potion also had an effect, beings Nyx is more-or-less trapped in this shape, it’s helping stabilize her?” Artemis proposed, getting everyone to gawk at Nyx even more as she put Proto-Excalibur in a leglock.

“Wait, so you mean this is how she would’ve looked BEFORE she became amorphous if she’d taken that potion?!” Valkyr asked, feeling even more turned on.

“COME ON NYX! CALM YOUR TITS FOR FIVE SECONDS!” Proto-Excalibur pleaded as Nyx changed from having him in a painful (but sexy) leglock and into a an even more painful (but still very sexy) armbinder.

“No! My anger has risen Warlord, and you’re currently the only one I want to smash for making me have to go through all this shit!” Nyx began bending him backwards, making Proto-Excalibur scream (in a manly fashion) in pain.

“DO IT OR YOU’RE KICKED!” Proto-Excalibur yelled, getting Nyx to stop. He then promptly spun around and squeezed Nyx’s left tit around her areola and nipple. “Honk!”

“YOU JACKASS!” Nyx yelled before going back to flinging around Proto-Excalibur like a ragdoll. “ONLY VALKITTY AND TIA CAN TOUCH ME!”

“YOU DIDN’T SAY THAT THE OTHER NIGHT!” Proto-Excalibur yelled before receiving a punch in the jaw. “WORTH IT!”

“Males are such pigs!” Nyx screamed as she threw Proto-Excalibur back down the other direction of the hall, passing the onlooking group like a bullet. She panted for a minute, before marching up to the group and grabbing Valkyr by the ‘ear’ of her helmet, and Tia by her helm’s horn, dragging them away. “I’m worked up, you’re going to help me calm down now.”

“YES~!” Both Valkyr and Celestia cried out in joy as they practically sped Nyx along to find a barrack for privacy…

Only to find that’s where Proto-Excalibur ended up.

“Ladies~.”

“...Fuck it! Tia, get his head!”

“W-wait, WHAT?! Noooooo~!” Proto-Excalibur cried out in false terror as the door shut, the rest of the group all looked at the door in bemusement.

“Hm...I think he’ll be fine for a few hours out of his frame, we just needed him in a stable cell-suppression frame for me to heal him and I already did.” Trinity considered, before shrugging. “Oh well, that display has me randy, come along stallion, I’m feeling seapony right now.” Trinity flicked Artemis’s ear, and the deep blue stallion grinned as he followed obediently, leaving Rhino Prime all alone in the room with Discord.

“...I’m not swapping genders and jumping you, just so you know.” Discord assured the only other bachelor not engaged in a relationship.

“Same here. Let’s just go play cards or something until this all calms down.” Rhino Prime said as he led Discord out of the green-turning-silver-due-to-Forma area. “Have you ever heard of Gin Rummy?”

“Have I~?”

---]=======/

        “... Why?” Proto-Excalibur more or less stated, rather than asked. “It always ends up with me being tied to the bed, and being untied at some point during the fun. Just…. why?”

        “Well last time was because you were a complete spoilsport.” Celestia said as she untied one of Proto-Excalibur’s feet from the large Grineer bunk bed. It wasn’t actually a bed as much as a slab, but Celestia’s magic made that a non-issue.

        “This time was because we didn’t want you getting any real action with our amazoness, considering how much you actually managed to piss her off.” Valkyr commented from under the covers Celestia had spawned with a snoozing Nyx, using her right boob as a pillow, her left cat ear against it as her free one twitched against the plain white blanket she and Nyx were under.

        “You say that, and I still got action with a princess and, surprise surprise, the ‘lesbian’.” Proto-Excalibur said. “Your explanation?”

        “Hey, you know that’s almost impossible for us non-stable Tenno right? I ‘prefer’ femme forms, but sometimes I want a hard pole to disrupt my biomass now and then. Don’t get your hopes up though.” Valkyr woozily commented, shifting under the plain white blanket to get more comfortable, making Nyx groan in her sleep. “Gods, a femme I can use as a bed. So hot….”

        “Shame she isn’t...big enough for both of us to sleep on her at once.” Celestia hinted with a lusty grin, making Valkyr purr and Proto hum in interest.

        “Say...how big can a Tenno get? You unstable Tenno hate eating I hear, but, what if you just kept adding to your Biomass? Could we get giants capable of defeating whole armies with ease?” Proto-Excalibur considered as he reached up to the shelf above the top bunk of the ‘bed’ and put his helmet back on.

        “No. At that point, we unstable Tenno become, well, even more unstable and aren’t able to actually keep us in one piece. Sure, we can form a body, but we’d be like...a really amorphous slime being of sorts, not a creature that’s able to fight, and building a Warframe of that size is just impractical. Lotus has had us do tests for that sort of thing. In the end it just results in black Tenno sludge having to be stored in tanks and occasionally used by Tenno wanting to move up to a bigger frame and not wanting to eat to gain the mass necessary to make it easier.” Valkyr said as she squeezed Nyx’s boobs from the sides, making the sleepy Nyx moan as the huge hill in the blanket bulged more.

“But how big can she get and still be physically viable?” Celestia asked insistently, rubbing her plot into the sheets.

“Considering her mass and her height? I’d say...maybe 10, 14 feet? Fourteen is pushing it, but I’d like to be optimistic. There’s no WAY she’d get a frame that big though.” Valkyr said. “But~, she’d definitely be of the size where we could both use her glorious tits as beds. Or at least large body pillows.”

“You two are just perverts.” Proto-Excalibur said. “Like, I’m a pervert, but you two are just irredeemable.”

“I’m over 3000 years old and unlike you lot I wasn’t in stasis for any of it. I have time and experience as excuses.” Celestia stated as she crawled under the covers at Nyx’s hips, and a few moments later, Nyx awoke with a cry of pleasure.

“And that just made my point. I’m going to leave now before you damage me, and make me actually consider having Lotus send a container of Tenno biomass, just to see a show.” Proto-Excalibur stood up, easily slipped into his Warframe, and jumped down to the door before leaving the three lovers be. ‘Hm, might just do that anyway, see if we can make a Warframe that big. It’d be interesting, seeing how something like that could fare on a planet’s surface. It’d need a special deployment system though….’

“So Warlord, I see you’re finally back on your feet?” Rhino Prime’s voice asked as Proto-Excalibur wandered the transforming mining facility to what seemed to be turning from yet another storage area into a rec room.

“Of course. What did you expect? Or were you hoping I’d stay a vegetable?” Proto-Excalibur joked. “I mean, seriously, it’s me we’re talking about here.”

“Very good sir, because we have an odd manifest of a shipment from Lotus.” Rhino Prime informed as an IM popped up on Proto-Excalibur’s HUD, and he about choked in surprise.

‘What does that bitch want?’