Behind Rarity's New Patterns: Outtakes Included

by TundraStanza

Rating: teen
Tags: My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, Ms. Harshwhinny, Random, Alternate Universe, Sweetie Belle, Main 6
Length: 1105

Making a short film is hard work. Even Rarity, who is a natural actor must admit it will be difficult to stay in character for this one. Take a look behind the scenes for a particular horror story.

Rarity has a huge new order to fulfill for her Canterlot friend Fancy Pants. But the clock is quickly ticking the hours away, and her materials are running much too low. But when she takes the time to observe her friends' fur, she discovers that maybe her fabrics aren't as scarce as she thought.

"Pfft! BAH ha ha ha ha ha ha!"

"Hee hee hee hee! Is this a snuff film?"

"Woo doggy. This here script is near impossible in some places."

"Tell me about it. I can't believe how many words they throw into this one line. Why would I ever say such long-winded mouthfuls?"

"Plus, we turn our heads around all the time. How would you go about 'snapping' my neck?"

"Oh well. Might as well have fun with this."
---
Rated "Teen" for hints toward very bloody messes.
Inspired by an acquaintance who suggested that it calms him down, having an actor-verse for these characters to talk about after the horror scenes of some fanfics are done.

Published 2018-10-04 00:20:01 UTC
Last updated 2018-10-04 00:20:01 UTC

Alright, Take 5

"You want me to... dye my hide blue?" asked Ms. Harshwhinny.

The director nodded quite fervently.

"I beg your pardon, Mr. Seventy-Seven, but fur dye is absurdly expensive. Plus, I'm going to wash it out almost immediately. It is unprofessional to waste such an exotic product."

The director lowered his head in a pout. This film needed a blue earth pony mare. As much as he would admit that Noteworthy looked girly enough, it just wouldn't be the same. He didn't just want Ms. Harshwhinny to take up the role. He needed her to do this. If he had a green story driver, it just wouldn't be the same.

"Oh, just a color change?" asked another mare off to the side. "One second."

There was a bit of a warbling sound, followed immediately by a flash of magenta light. Right at that moment, Ms. Harshwhinny looked down to find that her hooves looked much colder in color. Actually, as she took a wider scope of the situation, her entire body looked like the prescribed color suggested by the director. Aside from her mane and tail, every external body part had gained a tint of blue.

She directed a bemused look at the other mare. "This had better be temporary, Ms. Sparkle."

"Of course it's temporary." Twilight smiled while fluffing her wings against her sides. "It'll wear off as soon as we're done here."

"Well in that case," said Rarity as she entered the room as well, "let's find you a more suitable accessory to complement that new hide color. What do you think about scarves?"

Twilight waited until Rarity guided Ms. Harshwhinny to the dressing room before leaning over to the director's ear. "It'll wear off as soon as we're done or twenty-four hours from now. Whichever comes first."

The director held up a hoof to his mouth and chuckled.

"Action!"

The clapper board snapped before pulling away from the camera. In this scene, Rarity was supposed to open her door and give her trademark greeting to any customer that would walk into her boutique. Crystal Annora, played by Harshwhinny, would give a very proud and proper speech before describing a special order requested by Fancy Pants himself. Granted, the rich class pony would never set hoof on this set, but the viewers didn't need to know about that.

Meanwhile, the rest of the crew was standing off to the sides. Pinkie Pie was chowing down on some spicy cheese puffs, even though that wasn't one of the snacks that the filming team had brought. Twilight and Fluttershy were passing time with a children's card game. Applejack's attention, however, was caught on another voice who happened to be floating around and reciting something.

"I know that you know I hate dresses... I know that you know I hate dresses... I know that you know I hate dresses..."

"Seriously, RD?" Applejack tilted her head at the sight.

Rainbow Dash looked down from her copy of the script. "What?"

"What happened to being able to memorize your lines in a second?" AJ smirked.

Dash blew a raspberry. "It's not the lines I'm forgetting. It's the fluctuation. My voice keeps cracking at the wrong word, messing up the whole rhythm of where the stupid accent is supposed to be."

"Don't worry about the accent." Applejack waved a hoof dismissively. "Just say it how it comes naturally."

"Easy for you." Dash smiled wryly as she skimmed through her lines again. "Your accent doesn't have an off switch."

AJ cleared her throat and held up a hoof, as if balancing a wine glass on top of it. "Why, Rainbow, my darling, whatever could you mean by that?"

Rainbow's eyes went wide as she turned her head and stared at her friend. "H-H-How did you do that?"

Applejack chuckled lightheartedly, putting her hoof down and letting her voice return to its natural tone. "Well, I did happen to take a few fancy-speak lessons in my early childhood."

"Sweet Celestia, that was creepy." Dash shook her head. "You almost sounded like Rarity." Suddenly, she held an excited grin. "Hey! Maybe that should be the sequel to this 'dark' film. Fancy speaking voice possesses Applejack. Oooo." She raised her hooves up in a dangling posture to emphasize her point.

AJ could just barely contain her laughter. "Who knows? You might be able to convince the director to do something like that."

"Okay." Rainbow flipped her script open again. "Where was I?"

" 'I know that you know I hate dresses.' "

"Right, from the top, then."

It actually took the hair and prep team more effort to mess up Rarity's mane than it did for her to make it pretty that morning. The director hollered to Spike to hurry up with the cinnamon-colored blush in order to make her legs appear "bloody".

"On it!" The dragon scurried along with the makeup held in claws.

Meanwhile, Sweetie Belle had taken up position as Fluttershy's card battling partner as Twilight prepared for her 'entrance' scene.

"Um... Lily Musketeer, Rebecca will attack you," said Fluttershy, turning her card sideways.

"Looks like I have no choice," muttered Sweetie Belle as she floated down her last defensive card. "I guard with Blaster Blade."

Fluttershy nodded gently. "I end my turn."

At that moment, Twilight said her line that involved a yell. All of a sudden, the rubber knife that was meant to be re-skinned for edited shots bounced right along the card table. Pinkie Pie soon followed by bouncing in pursuit along the exact places that the 'knife' had. While that high-energy chase scene was going on, Rarity and Twilight were too busy laughing at the whole thing.

"Cut!"

*Later, in the screening room...*

"Can you believe how unrealistic those 'skeleton' mannequins are?" Rarity held out her hooves aghast. "I mean, just look at them! Do you know how many ponies have body proportions that could look even remotely like a perfect mannequin? Less than one percent!"

Twilight nodded. "Don't even get me started on how much of that skeletal structure is actually composed of air pockets and empty cavities."

Rainbow Dash scoffed. "Yeah. We'd be here until next week listening to you talk about bone-holes."

"Hey..." The alicorn playfully looked cross.

Everyone else in the room laughed to their own degree. Then, Twilight chuckled herself. Spike brought in a big bowl of popcorn before sitting down with them. The lights dimmed and Sweetie Belle shushed at the stragglers that were still laughing. It was time for the movie to start.

Author's Note

Happy October Night Stuff, everyone!