NaNoWriMo2015 Oneshot Colletction

Unfortunately for Shade, it seemed like he was not, in any way, used to or prepared to deal with lawyers. Especially not in a room where absolutely everything in the room was magically recorded and the lawyer was a seven foot tall wall of beefy muscle whose sharp smile was beginning to turn into a glower.

“We are in a Police Guard station, they are in the custody of the Police Guard. There are certain rights my clients have when within that custody. You have at least read them their rights, correct?” Habeas repeated, the glower now fully present.

Shade sputtered. “Excuse me, I’ll be back for you later,” he said, glaring at the four ponies before turning, and stalking out of the room, nearly running into Habeas Corpus in the process.

“Did he really just leave us here?” Moonlight asked suspiciously.

“Probably to go demand you get moved to Intelligence Guard custody. Only problem is, he has no reason, or ability, to take me, and I’m exceptionally good at getting around tricky legal situations outside courtrooms,” he said without a hint of arrogance, and his voice actually taking on a more normal tone and volume.

Neutral blinked. Twice, then stated rather than asked, “You were playing up the whole Minotaur Culture thing, weren’t you.”

Habeas smirked. “No, I am strong, proud minotaur, however, there are times I realize that quiet is needed, as well as preferred by the pony race. I can’t exactly represent a baut and side beside them while bellowing like a good, proper minotaur, can I?” he asked. Moonlight gave him a look. “I stand by my words,” he stated confidently. “Objections are a different case.”

“Why is that a problem that they can’t take you?” Flux asked, not sounding worried so much as hopeful at that. A problem for Shade was how he seemed to have phrased it.

“Oh, problem for them, good for us. Means I can go make a lot of noise—more so than expected of your average minotaur—and hopefully get the case moved to a more forcibly transparent Guard branch,” Habeas answered. “I’m not going to let them do any more than they are absolutely legally allowed to. Especially not while we’re sitting in a Police Guard station. I cannot believe the stupidity of whoever left you here. Makes my job easier, though.” He looked around at everypony.

“So, who exactly am I representing?” he asked, sounding more business-like.

“You… don’t know who you’re representing?” Event asked, his tone a mixture of surprise and confusion.

“I am kept on retainer by the Dancer family, formerly the Nights family, in case of legal troubles in Canterlot, so I know I’m representing Miss Dancer, however given you four are also here.” He paused, looking to Moonlight.

“Yeah, they’re your clients too,” she answered his look. “Neutral Charge, Thermal Flux, and Event Horizon. They all work with Starlight. Titles are probably Doctor as well.” She glanced at the three unicorns and received small nods of confirmation from each.

“Understood, now then,” Habeas picked back up, “there were a few fairly obvious things right there and then that needed to be addressed, and allowed me some wiggle room. This is going to get a whole lot harder pretty fast here if you ponies do end up in an Intelligence Service facility. Their supposed deniability is a pain in the arse to work around.”

“It can be worked around?” Flux asked in surprise.

“Never doubt Habeas. It usually ends badly for the doubter,” Moonlight answered with a mischievous smirk.

“Well, the primary work around is your conversation in here. For example, they now cannot deny an Agent… did he give his name?”

“Shade Stalker,” Neutral supplied.

“They cannot deny an Agent Shade Stalker took you into custody, they cannot deny he questioned you. They cannot deny anything that went on in this base. When they take you, they will not be able to deny that they did,” Habeas finished with a far too smug look.

“And why will they not? Couldn’t they just not say anything?” Moonlight asked, frowning in concern.

“No, if they do not announce themselves, I will be very loud about it. And the Police will do one of two things. Either they will tell me who is taking you, or they will stop those ponies from taking you,” the minotaur explained calmly. “Or stun me,” he added casually, “but that would be basically the same thing as admitting it was the Intelligence Service, so I’m not too worried.”

“Not worried about being stunned?” Flux asked in surprise.

“I have won the right to represent my family five times at the Minotaurian Games in the Caber toss. It takes a lot more than a few stunners to slow me down,” Habeas declared proudly. Neutral blinked at that… he would never have seen a Caber tossing Minotaur lawyer as a possibility in a million years, and yet here was one, right in front of him. “So you do not need to worry about me, nor about for fate, for I will be on the case!”

Neutral could only nod—as did Moonlight, Flux and Event—at the minotaurs confident, booming declaration. “Is there anything we should do while we’re stuck?” Event asked after a long moment.

“Yes. Do not, under any circumstances, answer any of their questions without me present. Do not discuss Doctor Dancer’s work or condition while under their custody, be very careful with all your food and drink, do not, under any circumstances, do anything hostile towards them, and finally, demand the Princess oversee the trial loudly and frequently,” Habeas answered levelly.

“And what are you going to be doing?” Flux asked.

“In the long run? Getting four out of trouble, especially undeserved trouble. In the short run? Grabbing Miss Dancer’s monstrosity of a chariot, renting a driver, and making a day trip to the Ponyville Police Guard station to pick up several files to use in your favour, then getting to work on getting you something more than a show trial,” Habeas answered.

“And if I was taken in for association with Starlight, what about mom and Shadow?” Moonlight asked the minotaur, sounding worried again.

“Don’t worry about your mother and brother. Your mother’s residence and work in Vanhoover protects her from any more than Guard questioning, which she is more than smart enough to ensure happens on the right terms for building a case in her favour if needed. Your brother is in the company of Final Appeal in transit out of Equestria until this blows over.”

“Isn’t Final Appeal a unicorn?” Moonlight asked. “How would they have gotten passage on a ship on such short notice?”

“If you remember, Final Appeal is about the same size as Doctor Flux, so I doubt it would be much worse than carrying a little extra in a rucksack for flight,” Habeas stated with an assured nod. “So, don’t worry about them. Right now, we need to worry about you, and your friends here.”

Moonlight nodded to Habeas. “Got it,” she said.

The door opened and Neutral jumped slightly, looking towards it, having been focused on the massive minotaur. Through the door stepped a trio of unicorns in matching black suits, with matching grey coats and darker manes. There were several more visible through the doorway. The first one gestured to Moonlight, Flux, Event and Neutral as he spoke. “You four, come with us.”