“So, what do you want to do?”
The question was on the three fillies’ minds, but they actually didn’t have any good answer.
“I don’t know… what do you want to do?”
There wasn’t much point crusading for their cutie marks anymore, and they hadn’t encountered any opportunity to use their newly discovered common talent. They would of course jump on any occasion that would present itself, for example if a foal was to knock on the door of the little tree house. None was coming though, so they had to find something else to do.
“Come on! We can’t just spend the whole evening finding out how to spend our evening!”
It was looking very much like they were going to, as those questions and complains had been going on for about thirty minutes and none of them had come up with any good idea.
“We could play some monopoly…” one of them proposed with a tone that was betraying how little she actually wanted to play that game.
“Nah, we played it a million times. It would be a waste of time.” responded another one of them, who didn’t want to admit she hated monopoly because she would always lose.
A little silence ensued, during which all three fillies looked at their front hooves in deep contemplation.
“So… what do you want to do?”
Applebloom was about to crack and get angry at the absurdity of the situation and, even more, at her own inability to find something to do together, but Scootaloo suddenly proposed, with an unusually shy tone of voice:
“Maybe we could play pretend…”
The two others stopped. This was unexpected. The fact that one of them had come up with an idea that wasn’t immediately rejected that is. Still, it was mostly because they hadn’t really understood what Scootaloo had said and forced her to repeat herself:
“We could play pretend… You know, like when we were younger, or when we were crusading.”
“You mean pretending to be doctors or something?”
“Isn’t that just like crusading?”
“No!” Scootaloo passionately replied. “Let’s just play. Let’s just have fun, like when we were way younger. Let’s just pretend for the fun of it, when we could be absolutely anything our imagination could come up with!”
Sweetie Belle and Apple Bloom looked at each other, trying to figure out what the other one thought of the idea. And in each other looks, they found the same deeply hidden will to try it once again, even if so many years later, now that they were older, or “all grown up” as they would qualify it.
There was just a part of them that wanted to play pretend.
“So, what should we pretend to be?” Sweetie Belle asked.
“Princesses?” Apple Bloom sort of proposed, finding it suddenly fun to imagine they could become demi-goddess by just deciding it to be so.
Deep down, she wasn’t against becoming a princess.
“So… does it mean I could be princess Celestia?” Sweetie belle asked.
“I think so... probably.” Apple Bloom replied. “That is, if I can be princess Twilight then.”
“Hey, not fair! I want to be princess Twilight!” Sweetie Belle complained, deciding that being Twilight Sparkle was way better than being the sun goddess all of a sudden.
Scootaloo, however, did seem pretty satisfied with her two friends calling dib on the purple alicorn:
“I want to be princess Luna.” she said.
“Why?” instinctively asked both of her friends, as they weren’t sure to see what could be so great about being forced to live mostly at night and doing stuff that they still weren’t sure to understand.
“If I’m princess Luna, I can decree that tonight will never cease and therefore no filly will have to go to school tomorrow.”
This was so illogical that Sweetie Belle didn’t even know where to begin:
“Wouldn’t princess Celestia oppose you?”
“Also, as a princess, wouldn’t it be simpler to just decree that no filly will have to go to school anymore for ever and ever?” Apple Bloom added.
“That does seem a way better to do it.” Sweetie Belle agreed.
And only then did it hit them.
“Wait just a second… you don’t want to go to school anymore?” Apple Bloom asked.
“Why?” Sweetie Belle asked.
But Scootaloo didn’t want to say. She just stayed silent, avoiding her friends’ looks the best she could.
“Come on Scoot’. Why don’t you want to go to school?”
“I’m not Scootaloo.” The filly replied. “I’m princess Luna, remember? Thou shall call me by my proper name.”
Apple Bloom sighed. They were children, sure, but she sometimes couldn’t believe how childish they could behave from times to times. Or all the times…
“Princess Luna, it is me, Twilight Sparkle: your friend. Please tell me why you don’t want to go to school tomorrow, in the name of friendship, and for Equestria’s sake and all of that is holly and… all that stuff.”
Her highness princess Luna of Equestria, with her royal purple eyes and filly’s pose, looked at Sweetie Belle to escape Apple Bloom’s request. But all she saw was the worried face of the little white unicorn.
“Please…” Sweetie Belle just said.
There was no escaping it. And in a big way, Scootaloo actually wanted to tell her friends, which was why she had made such a mystery about it, in that absolutely indisputable and infallible filly’s logic.
Too bad for her: Apple Bloom suddenly guessed right on the subject:
“Wait… you aren’t worried about tomorrow’s test now, are you?”
“Of course I am!” Scootaloo exploded. “I’m going to fail miserably, like always.”
Both Sweetie Belle and Apple Bloom would have loved to say things like “no, of course not” or “you don’t know that” or even a good “you should believe more in yourself”. The truth was, they knew way too well that Scootaloo was a very bad schoolpony. As in unable to obtain more than a D on a very good and lucky day, or when Cheerilee was trying to be generous or to encourage her to persevere.
She was the definition of a failure. That was the simple fact of the matter that had become impossible to deny. At least as long as one was willing to face reality as it was.
“Well, it’s not that bad… you could… I don’t know… just pretend that you’re some sort of misunderstood genius, couldn’t you?” Sweetie Belle proposed, unable to find anything better to say.
“Yeah, sure!” Scootaloo replied with a heavy sarcastic tone. “And then I can just pretend Rainbow Dash is going to be very proud of me when she sees another F that I’ll be adding to my collection! I’m sure she will want to spend time with me even more after that!”
“Hasn’t Rainbow Dash taken you as her little sister?” Apple Bloom asked. “She won’t reject you just because you got a bad grade…”
Why her voice had gone lower at the end of that sentence, Apple Bloom had no idea. Or more precisely, she couldn’t really put her hoof on it. But her voice had gone lower. Just as if she knew she was lying to Scootaloo. To her friend. To her.
“She says it too, but I can see how disappointed she is in me. She looks ashamed to be with me every time other pegasi are around. And I can’t blame her. When it happens, I just wish I could vanish. I’m just a weigh that prevents her to fly…”
Apple Bloom searched, but found nothing good to say. And what could she have said? Deny what was obviously true? It was very well known that Rainbow Dash had accepted to be Scootaloo's big sister out of pity for the filly. And yes, maybe the rainbow colored pegasus had hoped that her awesomeness would rub off on the filly. Maybe. But by now, she had to have realized the opposite was happening: the element of loyalty was trapped in a relationship she didn’t really want and that was hindering her and her chances of success in life.
It was Rainbow Dash’s fault. And of course, it was Scootaloo’s fault as well. The three fillies in the room knew it to be true, whether they wanted it or not.
“Aren’t we supposed to be playing pretend right now?” suddenly shouted Sweetie Belle with a bit of joy mixed with a lot of anxiety in her voice. “So for tonight, let’s just pretend, okay? We can pretend anything we want, it won’t hurt anypony, right? So there are no exam tomorrow, and Rainbow Dash loves you very much and you’re just awesome as her Scoot’ and one day, you’re going to be even more awesome!”
“Come on, that’s not possible.” blushed Scootaloo, as she was imagining what she would look like being even cooler that the most amazing pony to have ever flown in the equestrian sky.
“Of course it’s possible!” Sweetie Belle replied in a frenzy. “Tonight, everything is possible! that’s the rule.”
“Everything?” Apple Bloom asked. “You mean all we have to do is pretend?”
“Yes.” Sweetie Belle affirmed.
“Does that mean I could… I mean… I could for example pretend I’m going to become just as good of a farmer as my big brother?” Apple Bloom proposed.
“Of course. You’re going to be even a better farmer. Way better. You’re going to be the best in all of Equestria!”
Apple Bloom liked the sound of that. And Scootaloo seemed to agree to. There was nothing wrong with pretending. And if they could pretend such things, they saw no reason not to go just a bit further.
“So… if everything is possible, I can pretend I’m going to fly someday, no matter what the doctor said, right?” Scootaloo asked Sweetie Belle with a lot of hope.
“Yes, you can!” The white unicorn replied with so much energy and confidence that the young pegasus believed her.
“And I can pretend Granny Smith isn’t very old’” Apple Bloom asked with a lot of hope too.
“Yes, that’s the rule.” Sweetie Belle affirmed, convincing Apple Bloom too.
It was a whole world opening in front of their hooves. They jumped into it without asking any more questions.
“Then I decide I’m going to be very rich!” Apple Bloom said with confidence in the future.
“And I’m going to become even more intelligent than Twilight.” Scootaloo affirmed. “In fact, I’ll be the one teaching her in the future.”
“I’ll expand the farm and we will have an even bigger apple family to take care of it and we will grow tons and tons of delicious apples!”
“I’ll become a wonderbolt, and then their captain, and then a general, or an admiral, or whatever is the best at being the best flyer in all of Equestria, and Dash will be so very proud of me!”
“I’ll become old and wise and everypony is going to rely on me, just like my big sister!”
“I’ll… I’ll fly straight to the moon, and from up there I’ll rearrange all the stars in the sky to spell my name!”
Both fillies were having so much fun pretending all those absolutely certain and indisputable predictions that they had forgotten about their surroundings, which is until they suddenly realized how silent Sweetie Belle had been.
A very awkward and disturbing silence to be honest.
Apple Bloom decided to cheer her up:
“Don’t you want to pretend with us?” she asked.
“No, it’s okay…” the little unicorn replied.
“Come on, try it. it feels so great!” Scootaloo told her while grabbing her.
“I better not…” the small young unicorn once again replied.
“Don’t you want to pretend anything at all?” Apple Bloom asked.
But she quickly regretted to have asked, as she saw in Sweetie Belle’s eyes that, yes, indeed, there was something she wanted to pretend.
The tiny white filly whispered something that neither of her friends could hear, so they instinctively asked her to repeat it, even if they weren’t sure they wanted to risk ruining their newly acquired good moods.
“My sister’s stores won’t go bankrupt.” she said.
It took the two others by surprise.
They had had no idea Rarity’s shops could even go near anything like bankruptcy. And yet, given how much money Rarity was spending on so many fashion attires and how much she was giving to pretty much everypony, it shouldn’t have been such a surprise.
“I just want to pretend we don’t have any debts, and everything is going great, just like before.”
The two others stayed silent.
“Before was better. Nights were quiet.”
Another long silence ensued.
It was just too serious of a matter. If it was true, then very soon, too soon to be ignored, everything was going to change.
“But I want to pretend too.” Sweetie Belle said, with a false hope in her voice. “I want to pretend everything is fine. I want to pretend nopony cried.”
Neither Apple Bloom nor Scootaloo replied. At least not directly. Instead, Apple Bloom decided she had nothing to lose at that point and joined the game:
“I want to pretend too, if that’s okay. If we can pretend anything, anything whatsoever, then I want to pretend Big Mac won’t really leave the farm, and that Granny Smith will always be there for me and Applejack, for many many years, and we won’t be alone.”
The light had become very faint in the little treehouse. Shadows had taken over on many parts and nopony was even thinking of contesting them. If anything, at that point, their presence was feeling comforting. Because they were shadows. And you can’t see through the shadows.
“I want to pretend I’ve got a father and a mother too.” Apple Bloom continued. “I want to pretend they will be there when I come home and they will take me into their hooves and tell me they love me. And then Applejack will be happy too and she will stop lying about how she feels.”
Apple Bloom’s stomach was violently hurting. She could feel some sort of fire ravaging her intestines, crippling her and forcing tears in her eyes that she couldn’t find enough strength to hold back.
Scootaloo would have loved to comfort her, but her own stomach was hurting too, rendering her whole body powerless:
“I want to pretend Dash isn’t avoiding me. I want to pretend I don’t exist to serve no purpose whatsoever, and that I won’t die without having accomplished anything worth remembering.”
Sweetie Belle should have intervened. Any lie, at that point, would have been welcomed. Anything positive enough to forget all they had just said, all they had always wanted to say and share, all what had been making their lives miserable deep inside, while they were hiding behind a smile each and every day not to worry other ponies around.
Ponies that had their own problems. Ponies that couldn’t have helped. Because they couldn’t. Because they didn’t want to anymore. Because that was how things simply always had been and always would be.
Because they weren’t fillies and foals anymore.
They were all grown up now.
So Sweetie Belle didn’t intervene. She didn’t comfort her friends.
Instead, she said the one thing she didn’t really want to say, but had too because of the pain it was causing her to hold it in.
“I want to pretend…” she began, but stopped.
The two others were looking at her. And in their eyes, she saw they knew what she was going to say. With what little strength they had left, they were imploring her not to say it. No matter how terrible they were feeling right at that moment, they were still together, in the little dark treehouse, alone together, lost together, sad together, weak, powerless, completely hopeless, but together!
It was very little. And it was all that was left.
“I want to pretend…” she tried again. “I want to…”
The words were dying in her mouth. It was so simple, so evident she shouldn’t even have to say it. Everypony knew it already.
“I want to keep on pretending that we are friends!” she shouted in tears.
And before the others could say anything, she added:
“I want to pretend we didn’t hang out because of the circumstances, I want to pretend we would have been together even if one of us had had a cutie mark when we met. I want to pretend that we would keep in contact if we were to go our separate ways miles and miles away and that we wouldn’t feel like complete strangers if we were to meet again after ten years without seeing each other.
I want to pretend you’re my friends, and that I’m yours, and that it will last forever and that our friendship truly is magic.”
In the middle of the heavy silence that followed, the three mares looked at each other and saw how far the distance separating them truly was. For the first time in so long, they could observe who the other really was, how weird the other looked like, how different she was, how useless and how totally incompatible.
They were strangers.
They knew nothing about each other. They didn’t really care about each other. Through all those years, and they finally accepted it, they had only seen themselves when they were looking at one of the two other mares that were present in the room. Because themselves was the only thing that they had really been interested in all along.
That was the most simple truth of the matter.
And they were facing it without knowing what to feel. Without really feeling anything at all, which in itself was a new feeling they couldn’t identify.
Each one of them was facing the same new world. A gigantic world they knew nothing about, that had no established rules, nothing to offer any protection, and that was inhabited, as far as they knew, by two other complete strangers who were looking at her.
Scootaloo suddenly panicked. It was too much for the little filly. She screamed, cried and shouted:
“We are friends! We have always been! You know we are. We are together and we will prevail. Things are bad, but we can count on each other, and we will always be there for each other. I’ll always be there for you, no matter what happens!”
“We are friends!” immediately agreed both Sweetie Belle and Scootaloo, realizing how stupid it had been to even doubt it.
“You can rely on me.” assured Apple Bloom. “An apple never gives up.”
“You two would be lost without me. I can’t let that happen, now can I?” Sweetie Belle laughingly added, teasing her two friends who happily complained.
At that moment, they heard somepony knocking on the door and rushed to open and discover the very familiar faces of Applejack, Rarity and Rainbow Dash who were wondering why the three fillies would want to stay all alone in the treehouse instead of watching the beautiful sunset in the company of their favorite big sisters.
“We’re coming!” the shouted like one huge high pitched voice.
And they rushed outside in the hooves of those they loved, getting the hugs they needed and deserved.
They left the dark, cold and small treehouse behind.
And then Dash proposed:
“You know what? We shouldn’t just watch the sunset together. We should totally spend the whole night around a fire, telling stories and eating marshmallows, and then we could also watch the sun rise in the morning together. Wouldn’t it be just an awesome night?”
The fillies agreed.
“But what about school?” Scootaloo asked.
Dash and Applejack exchanged a blink:
“I guess you’ll just have to call in sick tomorrow. I’m sure you won’t have too much trouble convincing us to sign a note for your teacher.”
“She may actually join us…” Rarity told them all. “So school might very well be canceled tomorrow anyway.”
“You guys are way too young to care about such details!” Dash told the fillies. “You’re young: you've got to just enjoy!”
The three fillies agreed and joined their big sisters for what was promising to be a great night.
Everything was going to be fine now for sure.
And they were happy.
THE END
