A Wretched Soul

by _Fractured_Will_

Rating: mature
Tags: Romance, Original Character, Spike, Adventure, Sex, Human, Anthro, Main 6, Gore, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, Dark
Length: 2835

A poor soul, deprived of his freedom of choice from the very beginning. Until one day he is finally given the right to do what he wishes with his life. So, he chooses to end it, or at least, that's what he thinks will happen...

From the beginning, I have been deprived of my individuality, my freedom of choice. Since my first thought, everything has been planned out for me. My interests, friendships, hobbies, future career, even my lover has been set out in a predetermined blueprint. I have not been allowed to be me, only the thing they wanted me to be. Years subjugated, forced to conform, imprisoned...only in my mind could I ever be free! I have built thousands of fantasies based on a future where I had my freedom of choice, and my dream has finally become reality! But now I realize something, this world has nothing to offer me, only foreshadowings of future pain, sorrow and loss. So instead, I have decided that I will become the thief this time, I will take myself and leave this world behind.

Author's Note:
Hello everybody and welcome to my first "published" fanfic on the magnificent fimfiction.net. I hope you enjoy, or at the very least, have an "experience" while reading!

Things You Might Appreciate Knowing:
- As some of you might have noticed, this fanfic is tagged as Mature and including sexual content. The mature tag is basically just for the concepts and language used in the story. The sexual content tag is for any sexual content that *may* come. I'm not saying that there will be for certain, but there are no restrictions I have put in place for it, so if it happens, it happens. Oh, and there's gore.

Published 2015-12-22 01:50:01 UTC
Last updated 2016-01-12 04:45:13 UTC

Chapter One - Death, Rebirth, and More Death?

I stand silently on the rusted bridge rails, the wind blowing furiously against my face, causing my eyes to slightly tear up. A laugh softly rises from my throat and I turn my head, looking back over my shoulder as thunder booms loudly in the sky. Of course, there is nobody there, just a lifeless street being pelted by heavy rain.

I turn back, looking down at the churning waters below. Its finally happening, I'm finally going to leave this world behind...But why does it have to be so inconvenient!?

The weather had been perfect at first when I had arrived, bright blue skies and fluffy clouds, but soon after an intense storm had boiled up out of nowhere! When I had planned this, I made sure to choose a time and place where everything was to be to my specifications, that’s why I decided on today to do it. A sunny day, off a bridge, and a quiet, serene atmosphere, these were my requirements. It was my suicide of course, it had to be perfect!

“God damnit...I guess having to wait another day isn’t too much...”, I mutter to myself and lift my leg back to step off of the ridge, but ah, what is this!?! The wind suddenly buffets me with more force than before, causing me to quickly lose my balance. I slip and flip off the rails, A shout escaping my lips. The side of my head slams against the concrete ridge as I tumble off the side of the bridge, causing my vision to swim.

Lightning streaks down and sparks against the water. A blazing red light flashes out from the contact, blinding me and only which causes the trauma to my head to become more intense.

“Ah...fuck...”, I sigh, my mind slipping into unconsciousness as my body plummets into the inky depths below.

[/hr]

A strange calm quickly overwhelms my senses, putting my conscious into a zombie-like condition. My thoughts are slow and sluggish, barely able to form anything coherent. My vision is obstructed, no...its as if my eyes don't exist anymore in this state. My ears, nose and mouth appear to not be working also. The only sense left is a fuzzy feel of my surroundings, leaving me with only a vague detection of what is going on.

A comfortable warmth surrounds me. I am suspended in it's grasp as it rocks and twists around me in slow contortions. It is a foreign, but pleasant feeling, almost like...bliss...Heh...

This feels...so nice~...

My mind is hesitant at first, but then I give in and relax even more, almost in a complete meditative state, until all of the warmth suddenly ends, abruptly torn from me as if by a vacuum, and disappears with a loud *POP*.

"Agh!", I gasp in surprise, sucking in a large breath of damp, cool air.

...

Huh..I’m...still alive..?

A dull ache thrums through my head and my sight is still filled with a pitch black, but its more solid this time.

“What..the hell?”, I slowly curse out loud as my mind begins to re-adjust.

“Come on, move darnit! ...Agh, you useless idiot! Why couldn’t I have summoned something better, did the spell malfunction!?”

A loud and obnoxious voice explodes into my ear from my side, causing my head to jerk sharply to the side. I moved my face in the direction and finding that I still couldn’t see. Although, this time my eyes are shut tightly, sealed behind a thick layer of dust covering my face.

“The heck...calm down...”, I plead, rubbing the dust off and opening my eyes, only to find that the source of the voice is standing in front of me, and its...a blue pony girl?

Several feet before me, the most questionable creature I had ever seen was standing. She reminds me of a drawing an acquaintance showed me once, basically just a bunch of anthropoid animal scribbles on a piece of paper. Of course, she is a lot more 'real', and in more senses than one.

She is humanoid in figure and stands almost 5 feet tall, but still somewhat short in comparison to me. Her body is covered in a short, blue coat of fur and also has various equi-nesque features, such as a long blue horse tail, tall oval ears sprouting up from the sides of her head, and a slightly elongated snout. A short, swirled horn protrudes out of her forehead.

She is also sporting a flamboyant purple witch outfit, complete with a flared mini-skirt. There is a figure-hugging black vest going over her long sleeved shirt, covering the obviously raised mounds on her chest, the only reasons I can assume her sex. Her snout slightly scrunches as she glares angrily at me with her matching purple eyes, and her hands tightly grasp her round hips.

“Am I...dead? Is this the afterlife?”, I mumble to myself with a dazed look on my face.

“That’s where you’re about to be going if you don’t stop acting like an idiot and save me!”

She begins to scream and rant at me again and points off to the side.

My eyes follow her impatient motions and see another pony creature across from us, except this one had very noticeable differences, such as its more masculine features and rugged black coat. Reminiscent of a Shakespearean vagabond, his hair is matted and full of dreadlocks, he is even wearing clothing that loos like it had been stitched together from various leafs and twigs.

I also notice as I examine him that we are standing in a medium sized clearing, slightly bigger than my backyard and I am in the center, right between the two.

“So,” the rugged pony-man spoke, “this is your secret weapon that you were going to use against me? Hmph! It doesn’t even do anything except stand there looking like an imbecile!”

“Argh!”

The witch screeches loudly in her annoying voice. “Attack already!”

“Wait, what is-!”, I try to speak, but the man-pony interrupts me, cackling loudly with his archaic voice.

“Kekekek! Well then, if you’re just going to sit there, I’ll go first!” His face twists into a devilish grin and he raises his hand towards me.

“SCORCH!”

His shrill voice sounds loudly through the air and dark flames began to form and group together, suspended in front of his hand, before he shoots it off towards me.

I try to move, but can only manage to make a high pitched croak and stand still as the fireball rockets towards me.

*THUD*

The flames crash into my chest, causing a miniature explosion in front of me and send me flying backwards. A small squeal escapes my lips as I feel the force of the flames' impact crushing my chest. They crackle and pop as they dance around my body, painfully burning away my flesh, but I am incapable of screaming out in pain.

I give up, closing my eyes and giving one last shudder, waiting for the inevitable feeling of death to envelope me...

Author's Note

Hello and thank you to whoever is reading this! Again, I hope you had some type of experience reading and thought something about it. Don't be apprehensive about leaving comments with good, bad or neutral criticism, I don't mind it. Oh, also, what do you people think about the title? I spent a while agonizing over it) and if you think it isn't up to par with your expectations, I am open to any new suggestions!

Chapter Two - A Half-Successful Escape From Hell

Chapter Two - A Half-Successful Escape From Hell

...One...

...Two...

....

Three...?

I find myself counting down, impatiently awaiting my end, but surprisingly, nothing that I expect happens. Instead, a high pitched ringing noise goes of in my ears and my body is flooded with an overwhelming tingling sensation.

"Gah!", My eyes snap open and I discover that I am in the bottom of a smoldering crater, blood covering my burnt and warped body.

Oh fuck, the burns, my bones, I can see them! Oh god, no no no!

My mind quickly begins to enter a state of complete terror, but is then quickly negated as the next strangest occurrence since my appearance into this meadow abruptly begins.

My bones and burnt flesh begin to shift and the tingling feeling becomes an intense constant, feeling almost like electrification. Broken and jutting bones readjust themselves, setting and fusing with break off points, going back to a with a healthy white glow as they finish. It's a painful process, I feel every shift and crack as they re-break themselves to set. Then the rest starts to come back.

My expression is simply blank now as I watch muscles and flesh grow back over bones and, filling in the previously burnt holes and streaks in my body. This phenomenon quickly consumes me like a wave and soon I am left staring dumbfounded as my skin finishes regrowing over everything else.

What is this, what the heck is happening to me!?

Suddenly, a new, buzzing feeling builds builds up in my skin, more intense in my scalp, brow and crotch areas. I can feel new, thick hair growing out of my scalp and eventually several shaggy charcoal gray locks appear in my vision before it stops. The same thing happens and the rest of my androgenic hair finishes regrowing.

Of course then, a familiar, maddening voice reaches my ears, stopping me from even attempting to work out the cacophony of confusion my mind is experiencing.

"Get up, get up and fight right now! The great Trixie demands it!"

"Oh my god, why!?", I exclaim as I stand up.

I look up with a grimace and see the familiar witch ponicorn hopping around on the edges of the crater. She then pauses and stares at me for a moment, an unpredicted blush spreading on her face.

"Trixie also demands that you put on some clothes, this instant!"

Wait, what? Is she fucking serious right now!? Argh, I can't handle this anymore!

I open my mouth, ready to happily begin returning her screams in a more colorful manner, but then pause and let out a squeak as I look up behind her at the sky.

A long, thin bolt of red electricity streaks down towards me.

"AAAAAAAAAAGH!"

This time, a loud roar erupts from my lips this time as I experience yet another excruciatingly painful moment. Red plasma arcs over my body, causing more monstrous damage and indescribable pain to my body. Blood spurts from my flesh as it begins to rupture, and the brutal energy continues for several seconds more. Finally, it disperses and I collapse on the ground.

Then, the same process from earlier starts up and I am soon in perfect condition again.

"ARGH! WHAT THE FUCK!", I get on all fours, clenching the ground as I howl madly into the dirt. The pain was just simply unbearable, I do not have the mental fortitude to handle going through anything like that again.

I stand up again, this time goaded by the fear of more possible pain, and scramble out of the crater. I give the girl a heavy shove to move her out of the way and start running for the treeline.

"Wait, what are you doing!? Get back here and help, Trixie demands it!"

"Fuck you, crazy bitch!", I respond and feel another explosion go off behind me, but I am already past the trees, scrambling over various plant-life as I run through the woods.

I hear various screeches behind me, coming from the pony-person, Trixie, or whatever she called herself, but they quickly fade away as I flee like a madman.

Eventually, all that's left are the calm sounds of nature and various wildlife, but I still can't stop. I can't risk going through that again. Some time later, the fear finally fades, and I am standing alone in the woods, panting lightly.

I see a large boulder, and let myself fall against it, my face a mess of emotions.

What the hell just happened to me!? My mind can't even process my thoughts, and begins to become blank, so I just give up and lay on the rock. Eventually, weariness encompasses me and I let myself pass out, goaded into the comfortable blackness by the soft sounds of the wind around me.

A white mist flies around me, spinning around my torso before coming to rest in front of my head, forming into a featureless, grinning face.

"Well, well, well. Things sure turned out to be quite surprising, didn't they?"

An unusually mirthful voice resonates from it. I turn my face to the side with a frown, trying to avoid it's penetrating stare.

"Aww, somebody sure looks upset right now~ Tell me, why is Debbie being such a downer?"

The face flies in front of mine, refusing to let me look away. Its grin seems to widen at my reaction.

"Heheh, is it because you... failed again?"

It is now inches from my face, I can feel it's cold breath on me.

The face giggles mirthfully.

"You finally had a chance, didn't you? Well, you did, you can't deny that."

I open my mouth, trying to speak, but am incapable of any sound, forced just to listen.

"I'm not surprised with the outcome though. You've always been such a failure, never much of a real person, really. You worked much better as a helpless puppet."

My eyes are closed now, as I try to ignore it's demented jeering.

"Ignoring me now, are you? Oh well, I don't mind. I'll always be here, waiting, and unlike someone, I have no reservations when taking my chances."

The voice fades out after that and leaves me suspended alone in the cold nothingness.

I am standing on the boulder, huffing in panic. Various sticks and stones are strewn around me on the boulder, and all are covered in blood.

I had tried to immediately kill myself multiple times after I woke. Of course, I wasn't afraid of attempting, as nothing compared to the pain I had experienced earlier. But every wound would just be quickly regenerate.

So I'm still not aloud to choose what to do with my life huh...

Why couldn't I just die, did the world really have such a need as to defeat me at every turn!?

My body shivers uncontrollably as several sobs escape my throat. I lay on my spilled gore, crying loudly for an unimaginable amount of time.

Gradually, the sobs become less and less, until all that's left is emptiness inside.

I continue to lay for several hours more, counting as every second tics by. Eventually, I begin to feel sharp pains in the pit of my stomach.

So hunger is still a thing then?

Heh...

I get up and climb off the boulder.

Hearing sounds of splashing water nearby, I decide to follow the directions they are coming from.

I walk for some time, and then finally reach my destination, walking out of the trees into a small clearing.

A strangely clear pond is laid out before me. Small, colorful fish flit about in the center, flying out of the water every couple of seconds to snap at insects. With every one of their acrobatic leaps, the pond's water splashes into the air, and creates fleeting mini-rainbows in the sunlight.

I ignore them, staring hungrily at the fish for a moment, but quickly throw away the notion of even attempting to catch any to eat. Instead, I find some of bushes surrounding the pond, and scavenge through them. I find a couple of dark, red berries and scarf them down carelessly.

They leave a bland, bitter aftertaste in my mouth.

After somewhat sustaining my hunger, I step into the water to wash off all the carnage caked onto my body.

Hardened blood covers me, caked thickly in random splotches around my body. There were even chunks of dry flesh clinging to my chest, legs, and more places I felt uncomfortable thinking about.

I grab a rough stone from the bottom of the pond and begin to use it to vigorously clean myself. I throw up several times into the water, growing sick as the filth comes off of me in a thick slurry.

Finally, I finish, but stand still as something catches my attention.

I crane my head downwards, staring into my unfamiliar reflection below.

Author's Note

Second chapter is done, merry Christmas to you all!
Took me a couple days to get this done, so I'm sorry if I made any of you impatient. Since this is out, I'm going to work a bit on a one-shot that I am writing, so it might take three or four more days for chapter 3 to come out. Oh and don't forget to leave me any better ideas/criticism you have for this chapter's title. Besides that, like always, I hope you have a time while reading!