The Bucket

by Incredible Blunderbolt

Rating: teen
Tags: Rainbow Dash, Comedy, Cutie Mark Crusaders, Random, Discord, Twilight Sparkle, Main 6, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic
Length: 17863

A collection of things I've written, but can't or won't finish.

Sometimes, you start something and you just can't keep the steam up all the way to the end. Sometimes, you realize something's garbage before you finish it. Sometimes, you learn something about writing that makes you realize the story that you're working on is asinine.

This is where those stories that don't get finished go to die.

Published 2015-11-06 17:50:02 UTC
Last updated 2017-05-23 18:17:24 UTC

Organized Chaos

Author's Note

Bored with the same old predictable routines that his pony "friends" occupy their time with, Discord takes it upon himself to round out their interests more by taking away their talents in the fields they love. By making Twilight illiterate, Rainbow Dash uncoordinated, Pinkie Pie dislike the taste of sugar, Applejack forget how to farm, Fluttershy too loud to tend to animals, and Rarity have a creative block, he hopes that they'll soon learn that there are other things to do in life than just what they know they're interested in. And maybe, just maybe, make their lives more interesting.

At least to watch...

Organized Chaos

It was a perfectly cliché summer day in Ponyville. The hot, sunny kind where ponies milled about the streets lazily, frolicked in the park, played games and otherwise wasted no time being ordinary and normal. The gentle breeze pulled at the trees, the birds danced high in the sky and the flowers were tended to by the bees.

In other words, Discord was bored.

Actually, bored was an understatement; he was pretty sure that the Fields of Asphodel held more entertainment than Ponyville. At least the ponies there had an excuse to be so utterly unentertaining. They were dead, after all.

As his long, almost snake-like body hung upside-down from a cloud, he couldn't help but remember a better time. A more entertaining time. A time when anything—everything!—from ponies to weather patterns and even the so-called "laws of physics" were his to warp and shape as he saw fit.

Chocolate milk rain from cotton candy clouds? Delightfully absurd.

Oceans of cheese with tortilla fish? Deliciously odd.

Ponies suddenly forgetting how to stand? Or which end of their body their head was on? Perhaps speaking their words backwards while playing hopscotch on their roof? Wonderfully chaotic.

But alas, he lamented, sipping his cake batter through a bendy straw, Fluttershy didn't like any of those things. And what Fluttershy wanted, Fluttershy got. At least, as far as he was concerned. Maybe it was her smile. Regardless, if keeping Fluttershy happy meant not doing anything fun, he was in for a long eternity. Or at least a long sixty years or so.

The thought made his ear twitch. He was sure he'd blow a fuse if he was forced to entertain himself with so much nothing every day. It was practically torture!

On the ground below him, a dark blue stallion and a pearly white mare sat beneath a tree on a cliffside overlooking the town. Their forehooves were intertwined, and the mare's wing was wrapped firmly around the stallion's barrel. The sight in and of itself wasn't anything incredibly special, but Discord didn't really have much to look at, and found himself watching with tired eyes as the stallion pulled a tiny black box out of a picnic basket and showed the mare, who gasped and smiled like she'd just won the lottery. Without a moment's hesitation, she lept up and tackled the stallion to the ground before mashing her lips on his.

"How unique," Discord said, rolling his eyes. "A marriage proposal on cliffside—nopony's ever seen that one before." He watched as the stallion rolled the mare over, clearly intending to take over the kiss, but she wriggled free with a laugh and led him, bouncing, on a chase around the tree.

"You forgot to wait until sunset, you know!" Discord shouted at them from his perch. With a snap of his talons, a strange, omnipresent "Aww" sounded from no place in particular. "And don't tell me you didn't bring the violin players!"

He continued to watch the display for a few more minutes before giving up and spinning around on his cloud. Just because he couldn't make anything fun didn't mean he had to put up with everything boring that happened around him. It was time to do something. But what?

When ponies were bored, they'd visit friends, he mused. He didn't have many friends. In truth, he only really had one friend—and his relationship with her was tenuous at best. Still, there was a certain circle of ponies that weren't total strangers to him—he might even be inclined to call them his friends, if they were to ever hint that they enjoyed him as much as he enjoyed toying with them.

He wondered what they were up to. Perhaps one of them could fix him up with something to occupy his mind. It wasn't like he was having much fun on his own, after all. He may as well be bored with something to do.

With a shrug and a snap of his lion's paw, Discord conceded defeat, and his cloud popped and became a triangular kite embroidered with a mosaic of Celestia sticking her tongue out. It pulled him against the breeze toward the center of town, changing its expression every few moments. Readjusting his sunglasses, the draconequus took another long swig of his cake batter and swallowed it with a satisfied grunt. His eyes drifted to a particular tree by the town hall.

"I wonder what ol' Twily's up to today..."

A shiver of excitement raced up Discord's spine as his kite carried him right to Twilight's window. He couldn't help but wonder what kind of crazy experiments the (self-denied) mad scientist was concocting deep inside its bowels. Probably something exquisitely strange that he could watch explode—or melt, or disintegrate; he wasn't picky.

The kite burst into a few million bubbles that dropped to the ground like rocks as he flipped himself in midair and landed on the grass. The bubbles touched down by his hooves, and roiled before erupting into multicolored lilacs that he strode through to get to Twilight's window. Without a moment's hesitation, he grabbed the sill, turned to the reader and scoffed. "What? Doors are way too cliché!"

Through the window, he could see row upon row of books sitting in a large circle around a modest reading area decorated with cushy furniture. Perched upon a seagreen couch lay a purple alicorn with a book that was nearly as large as she was. Her head slowly drifted from side to side as she drank the words from each page like a pony dying of thirst. Or like a pony dying of boredom… Discord thought to himself as he leaned against the window.

The glass squeaked and stretched as he pressed himself closer and closer, warping into the library like it was made of rubber until finally, with a shattering crash, he found himself on the other side; the window jiggled as it swayed back into place. “Twilight!” he said, cheerfully doing the backstroke through the air toward her. “How wonderful you’re here!”

To her credit, the freshly crowned Princess of Friendship didn’t bat an eyelash—didn’t take her eyes off the book, as a matter of fact. She merely flipped a page and continued to scan the words without missing a beat. “It’s my home, Discord. Of course I’m here.”

“Ugh, how predictable.” Discord groaned. He set his lion paw on the ground as he floated backwards and swung like a switch onto the floor, landing with a soft poof! onto a pile of marshmallows. With a sigh, he looked over at Twilight and rested his head in his claw. “You ponies and your habits. Would it kill any one of you to do something interesting once in awhile?”

When Twilight didn’t answer him he rolled over and stared up at the ceiling. “I don’t suppose you’d be interested in doing something today, would you?” In the corner of his eye, he saw Twilight’s book dip just a bit as she regarded him with a raised eyebrow.

“Are you asking to hang out with me?”

That gave Discord pause for thought. Was he asking to hang out with Twilight? He’d just been searching for something to do, after all; he’d never “hung out” with anypony. The closest thing that he’d ever done to that was the time he’d turned Fluttershy’s house upside-down.

A bit of companionship might do him some good, he mused. Fluttershy was companionship enough, usually, though the animals in her care required near-constant supervision, so he didn’t get to see her as often as he’d like to. He turned to Twilight and shrugged. “I suppose so.” He snapped his claws and vanished for a moment, only to reappear behind Twilight, leaning over her side and looking into her eyes with a sly grin. “Why? Were you hoping I’d ask?”

Twilight coughed and turned her head to the side long enough to cover her nose with a hoof, causing Discord to wonder if perhaps vinegar hadn’t been the most appropriate thing to brush his teeth with that morning. “Not particularly,” she said blinking hard. “I’m actually pretty busy reading up on Maristophanes. I just got to his ostracization.”

“They Ostracised Maristophanes?” Discord asked, his eyes sliding telescopically out of his skull and examining the book around Twilight’s scowling face. “That’s too bad. I liked him.”

Twilight cleared her throat, and Discord’s eyes slid back into place with a low pitched sound much like a slide whistle. “Anyway,” she said flatly, “I’m unavailable right now. Maybe some other time when I’m not so busy.”

“Busy, busy, busy…” Discord sighed, taking a seat on the back of Twilight’s couch. “That’s all you ponies are, but it’s all your own doing. You don’t have to study right now, yet you choose to, and you call yourself busy.”

“That’s because I’m occupied with my current task, Discord,” the alicorn replied peevishly. She raised her book back up and turned to the next page.

“A task that you chose for yourself.” Discord held his paw in the air over himself and examined his claws. “You could easily drop it right now, but your habits forbid you. It’s quite sad, really.”

Nostrils flaring, Twilight set her book down on the coffee table and took a deep breath. “What I choose to do with my own time is my choice, Discord, and, frankly, none of your concern! So leave me in peace, please.”

Discord snapped his fingers and popped back into existence by the library door with a large bindle slung over his shoulder. “Fine,” he said with an exaggerated pout. “I see how it is. I’ll just go see if anypony else wants to spend some time with me.

His only response was the now-irritatingly familiar sound of a page turning. “Oh, come on!” he groaned. “Don’t you even want to know what’s in the bindle?”

Another page turn.

“Fine,” he huffed. With another snap of his fingers, the bindle untied itself and a forty pound lobster dropped to the ground at his hooves. “You can go home now, Barry,” he said, opening the door and walking out with a pout. “There’s nothing here for either of us.”

In Which Rainbow Dash Teaches Scootaloo Where Foals Come From

Author's Note

This fun little story would have revolved around Rainbow Dash teaching Scootaloo where foals come from. I'm sure you gathered that by the title, you clever reader, you.

The twist was that Dash never got the real talk herself. Instead, her father told her a wild story when she was a foal—including praying to the King of the Intergalactic Baby Mine on the fourth moon of Zeeru—that she still believes to this day. Twilight would have found out, having been worried why Rainbow Dash has been avoiding, uh, adult activities with her since they've been married for over a year, and walked in on Dash mid-story.

Later, the whole thing would've been cleared up, and Dash would've gotten a post-ending "hooves on" lesson on where foals really come from.

In Which Rainbow Dash Teaches Scootaloo Where Foals Come From

"Do you think I'm sexy?"

Rarity nearly choked on her croissant. Twilight grimaced as she watched her cough and splutter while fanning her mouth with a hoof. A dozen ponies also eating their breakfast outside the cafe looked at her with mild concern, but said nothing. "Wh-what?"

Twilight frowned and looked down at the table and stirred her spoon around in her oatmeal. "Do you think I'm sexy?" she asked again, this time a tad slower.

Rarity pressed her napkin over her mouth and closed her eyes as she started to regain control of her coughing fit. Through teary eyes, she looked back at the blurry mass of purple and shook her head. "I... What, darling?"

A groan escaped Twilight's lips as she leaned back. Her face was starting to turn noticeably pink. "Do you find me sexually appealing?" she asked with her eyes closed.

"Th-that's what I thought you said..."

Twilight looked at her expectantly, but Rarity just pursed her lips and looked away. The alicorn's ears fell as she watched. "I'm ugly, aren't I?" She poked her belly and sighed when her hoof met a yielding softness and sank into her. Years of too much time at the library and not enough time outside had clearly not benefited her as much physically as they had mentally. Still, she was within the average weight range for a mare her size. At least, she thought she was. "Am I fat?" she pleaded.

"Of course you aren't!" Rarity answered sharply. She looked around the dining area, her cheeks alight with a fierce blush. Of all the places Twilight had to bring up a topic like this, she groaned inwardly, it just had to be a public restaurant. "Twilight, dear, you're not fat at all!"

A scowl pulled at Twilight's lips. "Then why don't you find me sexy?" she demanded. "Is it my mane? My tail? Do I stink?"

"Twilight," Rarity protested, still waving her hoof to her face. Her heart beat furiously in her chest. She'd never in a million years thought she'd find herself in a situation like this. "You're married!" she hissed. "Think of the scandal if we were to--"

"Huh?" Twilight said, blinking. She gave Rarity a searching look and raised her eyebrow. "What does me being married have to do with--Oh!" Twilight's eyes shot open and she shook her head emphatically. "Oh, you thought--No! No! No!"

Rarity bit her lip. Her eyes darted from side to side, checking for any potential eavesdroppers. "Then what in Equestria are we talking about?"

"Just what I said!" Twilight's hooves curled onto the table as she leaned in towards Rarity, a mere slip of a hoof away from faceplanting into her friend's tea. "Do you think I'm sexy or not?!"

"I-I really don't feel comfortable--"

"Rarity!" Twilight growled, fixing an frustrated glare into Rarity's eyes. "Rainbow Dash won't have sex with me!"

It was like Twilight had been waiting to deliver a final blow. One last surprise exclamation that would cause Rarity's thought processes to squeal to a grinding halt. She knew Twilight was sitting back down. She watched as her friend stared at her oatmeal with pink cheeks and sullen eyes. She saw Twilight's ears swivel back and forth, waiting for some sort of response. All of those things she saw, but none of them registered in her mind at all. Then, like a rubber band that had been stretched out over a long distance and let go, it all came rushing back to her at once.

Why didn't I visit Fluttershy today instead?

"Sh-she won't?" Rarity said, finally. She felt a sharp pain in her face and realized it had been pulled back in sheer horror. She cleared her throat nonchalantly as she readjusted herself on her seat and attempted to get back into a relaxed state. Her hoof tapped a tuneless melody on the table as her eyes danced from her tea to her plate. "Why not?"

Twilight groaned and threw her head back. "I don't know!" she cried, exasperated. "When we were dating, I used to think that maybe she was just waiting for marriage, you know? But when nothing happened on our honeymoon--"

"Wait, wait, wait!" Rarity leaned forward and grasped the sides of the table with her hooves. She blinked several times and looked at Twilight like she'd suddenly announced she was going to rob a bank. "You mean you two have never--"

"Not once!" Twilight reaffirmed. Her eyes welled up with tears as she spoke, staring into her oatmeal. "Not a single time in two years of marriage!" She sniffled. "I wish she'd just tell me if she finds me unattractive..."

Rarity pursed her lips and took one of Twilight's hooves in her own. "Twilight, listen to me. You are a beautiful mare with a lot sexual appeal." There was a hitch in her breath as she again scanned the dining area. The stallion at the table next to them was staring at them, licking his lips slowly. His grin vanished quickly though, when a burst of blue magic pulled his cowpony hat down over passed his chin.

"Then why won't Rainbow sleep with me?" Twilight huffed. "I've tried so hard! Remember the lingerie I bought from you?"

Rarity's face turned an even darker shade of red as she remember that particular purchase. Is she trying to destroy my reputation? "Yes," she said stiffly, waving aside the memory of Twilight asking about bridle flavors. "Yes, I do remember you purchasing some intimate apparel from my boutique. It didn't help at all?"

Twilight groaned. "I was laying on the bed with my--"

"Ahem!" Rarity coughed. Her ears slicked back against her skull as she gently squeezed Twilight's hoof and tried with all her might to leave the mental image her cruel imagination was conjuring up very much incomplete. "Yes, I get the picture, dear."

"Do you know what she said?" Twilight hissed. "'Hey, Twilight, what's with the new PJ's?'"

Rarity's jaw dropped. Her Autumn Lovers' line was the most risque collection outside of Manehatten! Ponies all over the country had been ordering from her for months! "She didn't!"

"And then she went to sleep! With me right next to her!" Twilight growled into her tea. "I just don't get it! What's wrong with me?"

Rarity let Twilight's question hang in the air for a bit as she let everything soak in. It can't be... she thought. Rainbow's hardly the type for empathy, but even she isn't that dense... Unless... Suddenly, an idea popped into her mind. One that made her chuckle almost as much as it made her cringe.

"Perhaps she's just waiting for you to take the lead?" she suggested, still tapping her hoof on the table. "They say that ponies that are most dominant outside of the bedroom are usually the least in it. She may be shy."

Twilight opened her mouth--probably to wave off the idea--when a spark lit off in her eyes. "I think you're right!" she cheered. "She usually likes it the most when I'm the one kissing her! You might be on to something, Rarity!"

"Yes, I might." A nervous laugh leaped from her throat before she could stuff it back down. "Now could we please get back to brunch?"

"Sure thing, Rarity!" Twilight beamed, taking a happy swig of her tea. "But I'm not really all that hungry anymore. How about we just skip to the spa?"

The dam broke, and a surge of relief flooded Rarity's veins. "The spa sounds lovely," she said, closing her eyes and standing up. "I'm sure I've got a ton of knots for Aloe to work out today."

Twilight joined her as they made they made their way out of the dining area. "Really?" she asked, opening the gate with her magic and letting Rarity pass by. "Is life in the Boutique getting to you again?"

A little blue filly sitting under an umbrella picnic table tapped the shoulder of the mare next to her. "Mommy, what's a 'lingerie'?"

Rarity's nostrils flared. "You could say that."

“Bill… Bill… Bill…” Rainbow droned, flipping through each letter with the same disinterested look one might give a wall of drying paint. “...Bill…” She sighed and leaned back into her chair, tossing the dense pack of envelopes onto the table next to a teetering stack of book-order catalogues. “We’ve only been married for two years!” she groused incredulously. “How the heck do we have this many bills!”

Rainbow have to work some serious overtime to make up for the hit they were taking for Twilight’s latest experiment. She’d thought she’d talked to her wife about the power draw her science doodad... thing in the basement was creating. Either that thing was getting turned off, or she wasn’t going to be able to sleep for the next few days. She could already feel her wings creaking.

There was the monster insurance bill that had skyrocketed after Spike’s recent bout with the fire flu. And then she had to find money for trash removal and replacement for the resulting destroyed books, shelves and bed. That wasn’t even factoring in the next payment for the money they still owed for their wedding and the honeymoon afterward. And after all of that she had to make sure she had enough bits left over to pick up her uniform at the drycleaner’s before wednesday.

Releasing a long, tired moan of defeat, Rainbow dropped her head into her hooves. It was times like this that she really wished Twilight wasn’t so determined to get by without the assistance of the Royal Treasurey. Maybe she could talk her into at least getting some grant or something for the giant telescope that Twilight just had to have to study Neptune better. “That mare’s gonna fly me into an early grave. I miss back when I was the irresponsible one…”

Rainbow cast a weary look at the stack of mail again and decided that she’d rather just deal with it all later. Numbers were Twilight’s thing anyway. However, before she stood up she noticed something peculiar. A stamp.

A grin broke out on Rainbow’s face. Did it finally come in? She reached out and grabbed the little yellow envelope and ripped it open with curiosity. She nearly tore the paper inside doing so--Twilight would have been furious if she’d done that with the letter opener next to her--but she’d never use a tool that sissy. Maybe a knife, she mused, pulling the letter out and unfolding it. Stars glimmered in her eyes. A really big knife. Like… Like a Bowie knife! Or a machete!

As visions of her defeating legions of scowling, sharp-toothed envelopes with her trusty patta filled her mind, she let her eyes drift over the header of the page. Dear Mrs. Rainbow Sparkle…

“Ugh,” Rainbow groaned at the sight of her new name. “How did she manage talk me into that? It sounds so…” She shivered, then sighed as she remembered bright violet eyes flooding with hope and cheer. “Only for her…”

Her eyes drifted across the page lazily. She was in no hurry to get back to finding out how much farther they’d managed to dig their little family into the hole just yet. The letter was dry, but when Rainbow’s eyes finally landed on the phrase “adoption accepted,” she felt like jumping for joy. So she did, right out of her seat, with a mighty “yes!”

“Spike!” the pegasus called up to the ceiling as she landed and let her wings relax. “Congratulations, buddy! You’ve got a sister now!” And just like that, Rainbow’s brow furrowed. “Or a cousin. ...Neice?”

Rainbow was pulled from her sudden burst of semanticism when she heard a door slam on the other side of the library. “I’m back from school!” a cheerful and high-pitched voice announced.

The Journal

Author's Note

This was going to be one of those slow-burn "realize she loves me over time" TwiDash stories. Nothing really left to say about it.

The Journal

7, Month of the Sun, 1003

Dearest Princess Twilight Sparkle,

I’m still getting little shivers up my spine, writing that. It feels… Indescribable. For the first time in my life, I’m truly at a loss for words. This feeling of sheer success—of achievement—is unrivaled by anything I’ve ever done before in my life. Princess Twilight Sparkle. Haha.

~~Princess~~ Celestia suggested that I keep a daily journal now that I’m an alicorn, to see how I change over the centuries and remember how and who I was if I ever lose myself. I didn’t dare ask if she was speaking from experience, but the shimmer in her eyes was a definite sign of… something. Regardless, she’s never steered me wrong before, so here I am.

I can see the logic in this. It makes sense, after all. Ponies change over time as we accrue knowledge and experience and start and end relationships with ponies important to us. Millennia from now—that’s such a hard concept to grasp! I mean the sheer magnitude of knowing I’ll still be here when everything around me has crumbled and turned to dust is so… incredible. And scary. I wonder, what will tomorrow look like, Future Princess Twilight?

But I digress. Millennia from now, I could be a completely different pony. I could be a nicer pony. I hope that’s true. But, this journal will truly be worth the effort if I fall into the trap I suspect ~~Princess~~ Celestia suspects I might. The trap of forgetting myself. The trap of apathy—or worse: callousness.

This journal might help me remember what it was like to be young. To still know what it feels like to just be a citizen of Equestria. To know what it is to look to the princesses for help or guidance. If that’s the case, and you’re reading this because you need to, Future Me, please remember quickly. I don’t want to be that pony. I’d rather die.

But enough of the philosophical, I’m here to catalogue my days, not my thoughts. Or rather, my thoughts on my days. Something to that effect, at least.

As I’m sure you’ve guessed, Future Me, today was the day we were coronated.

Full House

Author's Note

This was going to be a second person YouXDash story, where you wind up betting Dash's house to a cheater, and have to go all the way to Las Pegasus by train to beat him and get it back. It was going to be based on Kenny Rogers "The Gambler," complete with an old stallion in the train car that teaches you a few tricks of the poker trade.

Full House

The bar is stuffy and crowded with ponies enjoying the first night of the weekend. Cheers and drunken howls are erupting from the dance floor, animalistic representations of the formerly professional workers. You don’t really care though. After all, it’s the same every Friday in Ponyville.

In fact, you think humorously, today is not only payday for them, but for you as well. A shadow of a smile creeps onto your face as you toss your cards on the table before you. “Read it and weep, boys,” you say with a laugh. “Full house—Jacks on eights.”

Your opponents’ jaws drop comically as you wrap a hoof around their hard earned Bits—easily three day’s worth of pay—and drag them towards your side of the table, adding them to the already large pile of golden coins that made up your winnings. One yellow stallion knocked his mug off the table in anger, his cider spewing all over the floor. “You damn Snake!” he roared, slamming his forehooves on the fine oak.

A look down at your mug confirms that his outburst has caused some of your cider to bounce out of its container and land on the table. You feel your lip perk up into your signature smug smirk. “That’s what they call me,” you chide. “Never play poker with a pony called 'Snake.'” Then closer, with a complete seriousness, you growl, “I never lose.”

It wasn’t like you’d forced them to play against you, was it? Besides, it was their own damn fault for being so easy to fool! A subtle shiver here, a couple of ‘nervous’ twitches, and they’d all believed you were bluffing; something that most definitely encouraged Peels, the banana farmer, to go all in on his hand. You shake your head in disbelief, this game seemed to get easier and easier every day you played it.

Well, maybe your world shouldn’t be phrased quite so ‘life of leisure’ esque. Having no real job—aside from taking other ponies’ mis-gambled Bits—you’ve certainly had more than your fair share of cold, hungry nights, sleeping in alleyways. But, for the most part, ‘life of leisure’ was actually a good way to put it. You did what you wanted when you wanted to do it--and if you didn’t have enough coin, there was always somepony out there willing to take a chance. Too bad for them, you rarely ever lose. With a special talent for poker, how could you?

Canterlot Tales Episode 1

Author's Note

I won't be saying much about this, because I'm still going to be making this AU. This is simply a rejected setup for it. I've decided to take a different approach than the standard rehash of the first episode of FiM. All you really need to know about this is what's already obvious from the get-go. If the character designs seem familliar, though, it's probably because you've seen the piece I commissioned from MysticAlpha a few years ago. I've had this idea kicking around in my head since about 2014.

Naturally, since I'm now essentially throwing away 11.5k, the first episode won't be out for a couple weeks (at least,) but I thought I'd throw this up here because it seemed a shame to trash so many words.

Canterlot Tales Episode 1

Rainbow Dash’s heart pounded furiously in her chest as she stared down at the ponies below. From this height, they looked like fleas scurrying around the collection of towered houses and cafes that made up the cloud district of Canterlot. She clenched her fists and took a deep breath.

“The sun’s barely up,” she whispered to herself. Her fingers fumbled across the window until they reached the handle and clasped it tightly. “You can do this, Rainbow.”

A burst of air flooded the room, throwing books off of shelves and turning Rainbow’s perfectly brushed mane into a chaotic mess of colors. She yelped in surprise and stumbled backwards, tripping over her hooves and landing with a loud thud on the floor of the library’s dusty attic. Her hand quickly shot up to ensure that, yes, her glasses were still safe on her face.

“Stupid. I should have known that would happen at this height . . .”

The air from the window was cold and sharp, and it bit Rainbow like a wintry gust instead of the summer breeze it should have been. The sheer altitude was to thank for that, Rainbow knew, but it didn’t stop her from shivering as she stood up and made her way back to the opening. She needed this height—or, more accurately, the seclusion it brought. No wandering eyes dared come around here.

Rainbow’s wings fluttered with nervous excitement when the wind hit her face. Her flight muscles ached. It had been so long since she’d dared take to the sky. As usual, test after test and study session after study session had left her with no time to take part in her fillyhood hobby. She hadn’t dared to ask her teacher for a break—she knew every moment of Princess Celestia’s time was a precious gift—but the only free time she’d had lately was in the middle of the day, when anypony could see her flapping like a chicken. But today was the first day of summer break, and that meant she wouldn’t have another test for at least a few weeks. This morning marked the first day she could spend however she wished. This morning, she was going to fly for once.

It only took a second for Rainbow Dash to climb up into the window. It wasn’t large by any means, but if she crouched it was more than enough for her shorter than average frame. She shivered as another freezing gust sapped the heat from her bones.

“Okay,” she said to herself, flaring her wings. “No big deal; nopony’s around.” Her voice was shaky, so Rainbow took another deep breath. “Just focus. Air foil.” Her wings shook behind her. The breeze blew against her face. “Headwind. Thrust and drag.” She opened her eyes one last time and stared down at the world below. It was going to be a long fall if she messed this up. Gulping, she finished her mental checklist. “Weight. Now or never, Rainbow Dash . . .”

Her legs flexed on their perch, then catapulted her away from it and into the sky. The attic vanished behind her and the world turned blue and white. The sudden chill in the air made Rainbow gasp, even as her wings seized up and stuck to her back for warmth. For a moment, she floated in the air, weightless, before gravity caught up to her and she started to sink. Slowly at first, but after a mere second or two, she was rocketing toward the ground, screaming.

“No, no, no! Air foil! Air foil!” Her wings ignored her words, however, and stayed firm against Rainbow’s freezing back. Desperately, she stuck her arms out and flapped wildly. It worked about as well as she knew it would.

“Air foil!” “ Rainbow berated herself as she watched the ground draw closer and closer. “Air foil, now!” Suddenly, like they’d just woken up, her wings sprung out. There was a noise like a vicious thundercrack, then the pegasus found herself slowing down. She looked at her wide, blue wings with pride and grinned. “Yes!”

She twisted in the air, absentmindedly muttering instructions to herself. Bank here, flap there, roll thirty degrees to the right. In no time at all, she’d managed to halt her speedy dive and, spiraling around the library’s massive tower, climb back up to around the altitude that she’d jumped at. When she could see back inside the attic through the window, Rainbow allowed herself to slow to a bobbing hover and wiped her brow. “Still not any better,” she grumbled, staring out at the castle in the distance. “Princess Celestia’s never going to live it down if I can’t even take off correctly...”

A few miles away, Canterlot Castle stood resolute against the setting sun. Several hundred feet high and built into the side of Stirrup Mountain, her teacher’s home was the focal point for all of Canterlot. From this height, Rainbow Dash could see the well-groomed estates and cafes surrounding the castle to the dirty, all the way down to the congested slums and farmlands at the base of the mountain. Every pony in this city, and in all of Equestria, looked up to Celestia for hope and guidance. Rainbow Dash was supposed to be a direct reflection of her influence on a single pony and she couldn’t even fly properly. What would Celestia say if she ever discovered her pupil’s difficulties? What would Equestria say? Rainbow didn’t dare find out.

After double-checking to make sure nopony was watching, she rolled her wings out and flew forward a few feet. “Flare, flap, glide . . .” she mumbled. “Get it right. She needs you to get it right . . . No, this is too far left . . .” Sticking her tongue out, she twisted her legs under herself in an effort to correct her flight path. “Come on! Flare, then flap . . .”

When Rainbow managed to gain a couple yards, she allowed herself a smile and looked behind herself at the library tower. “Only twenty-three flaps today! That’s almost a fifteen percent improvement!” Maybe she wouldn’t be a total embarrassment to her mentor. Maybe she could become a better flyer! She released a squeal of delight that quickly turned into a sharp shriek when she accidentally forgot to flap and dropped several feet.

Shivering, Rainbow closed her eyes and wrapped her arms around herself. “M-maybe it’s time for a quick break . . .” she said quietly.

My Little Pony: Canterlot Tales
Episode 1: The Mare in the Moon

The first thing Rainbow Dash noticed when she got back into the library’s main hall was the mess. Books were scattered in all corners of the room, stacked nearly as tall as she was, laying on tables or tossed haphazardly into piles next to shelves. One particular pile next to a waist-high shelf in the reading area had clearly given up its efforts to stay up, and had collapsed onto the rocking chair, tipping it backward at an absurd angle.

Rainbow’s fingers balled into fists as she scanned the room for the vandal. “Thorn!” she barked. “What did you do?”

A feathered head poked up from behind another pile in the corner of the room. “I brought out the returns,” the young griffon said matter-of-factly. “You’ve put them off long enough, haven’t you? I’m practically sleeping on these things.”

“Oh . . .” Rainbow felt her cheeks warm up as she scratched the back of her neck. “Sorry, I’ve just been so busy lately that I forgot.”

“No kidding,” Thorn deadpanned, disappearing back behind the stack. A few muffled thumps followed behind him and then Rainbow heard the distinctive sound of books sliding onto the wooden shelves. “You really need to tell Princess Celestia to lessen your workload. This is getting ridiculous.”

Rainbow frowned as she braced herself against one of the library’s many ceiling-high stained glass windows and stepped carefully over a fence of returns. “You know that’s out of the question, Thorn. Princess Celestia—”

“—expects the best out of her personal student, and so do you,” Thorn finished. Rainbow could practically feel him rolling his eyes as he spoke. “I know your lessons are complex and all, but you never go out and do anything. All this work has turned you into a hermit!”

“That’s nothing new, you know.” Rainbow rounded the corner and found Thorn four shelves up, cramming a large tome onto a bowing shelf that looked ready to give way any minute. She crossed her arms and sighed. “I’ve liked being alone to study ever since Celestia took me on as her student. And what have I told you about climbing on the shelves? We’re guests here. The claw marks are bad enough; I don’t want to have to explain when the shelf snaps and you break a leg or something.”

Thorn snorted in exasperation and dropped from his perch, flaring his wings just before landing and crossing his own arms. Even though Rainbow Dash had to look up to most ponies, she still towered over the young griffon. Not that that mattered much, because Thorn had an attitude twice as tall as any one pony she’d ever met. “What do you want me to do? Leave the books on the floor?”

Rainbow’s brow creased. It might have looked more intimidating if her glasses hadn’t chosen that moment to slide halfway down her nose. She picked up her hand and pointed to a rolling ladder a few yards to their left and cleared her throat. “And besides that, you’re a griffon. You have wings. Use them.”

Thorn smirked. “Look who’s talking.”

A scowl darkened Rainbow’s face and she fought the urge to curse. Thorn knew flying was a sore spot for her, yet he never seemed to tire of using it against her. “Keep this up and you’ll go vegetarian for a month, mister,” she warned.

The jolt of fear that flashed through Thorn’s eyes was more than enough to tell Rainbow Dash that she’d won. When they darted away and his shoulders fell, Rainbow let her arms down. “Relax,” she relented. “You know I won’t do that again.” A soft smile grew on her face and she tussled the burgundy feathers cresting his head. “Not after last time. But seriously, no climbing.”

“Fine.” Thorn nodded and turned back around to the pile of books. “Can you hand me another book from that pile over there? I’m trying to get through the ‘Mo’s’ before bed.”

Rainbow Dash nodded and turned her gaze to the large pile before her. Book upon book had been tossed haphazardly onto the floor without much care taken to ensure organization. Normally, that would be fine with her—she would happily admit to her horrible habit of shoving everything in one corner over confessing her flight difficulties—but the pile clogged up the entire section of hallway, and she’d have to stretch as tall as possible to reach the topmost books. A pit settled in her stomach when she remembered the dozens of other piles scattered through the lobby. “How did all of these fit in your room?”

“They didn’t,” Thorn huffed. “I had to start stacking them in the hallway last month.”

“. . . Oh.”

A gold colored book found itself to be Rainbow’s first victim as she plucked it from one of the smaller peaks in the pile and checked the cover. “The Rise and Fall of Nightmare Moon?” she said, raising an eyebrow. “Somepony actually checked this out?”

“Apparently. These are the returns, after all.” Thorn waved a tired claw around the library in a grand and over-exaggerated gesture. “All two thousand, four hundred and twenty six of them.”

Rainbow raised her eyes off the book and leveled a glare at him. “Yes, Thorn. I get it. It’s a lot.” She settled her gaze back down on the cover and brushed the thick layer of dust off of it with a finger. “I just don’t see why somepony would check this out after so long…”

Thorn shrugged and turned back to the pile with a sigh. “Who knows?” he said, picking up a bright green textbook. “Maybe they wanted a campfire story?”

“I don’t think so.” Rainbow frowned and flipped the book open. As she thumbed through the pages, dozens of images of a pair of alicorns dressed in royal robes danced before her eyes. “If somepony wanted to tell Nightmare Night stories, they wouldn’t check out a history book.”

“A history book?” Thorn snorted. “You’re telling me there really was an evil night-pony who gobbled up foals if they didn’t give her candy?”

Rainbow sighed as her eyes grazed over a highly detailed picture of a dark pony in black armor silhouetted by the light of the full moon. Her hand was clenched tight over the hilt of a long, jagged sword that hung from her hip. A dark feeling settled deep down in Rainbow’s stomach as she looked in the figure’s deep, menacing eyes. They seemed to glow with bright white power even beyond the confines of the picture, and the anger in them only increased the malice of her fearsome scowl. Suddenly, Rainbow’s mouth felt inexplicably dry. “O-of course not.”

“Then what’s a book like that doing in the history section? What’s it even about?”

“It’s an old legend, Thorn,” Rainbow explained as she tore her eyes away from the armored woman and shook her head. She flipped a few pages forward. “Pre-Canterlotian, actually. Celestia used to tell it to me as a bedtime story when I was a little filly. Ponies of the classical era believed that there were once two princesses of Equestria. One, Princess Celestia, was in charge of the raising and lowering of the sun, but the other was charged with the moon.”

Thorn scoffed from the ladder as he slid a book as thick as his arm into position, balancing only on one paw. The ladder slipped as he shifted his weight, and he latched onto the shelf with his claws. Rainbow winced as a sharp rapping sound announced the presence of several new holes in the mahogany. “That’s just ridiculous,” he said, fluttering his wings and dropping himself back to the floor with an expert control Rainbow couldn’t help but envy. “Everypony knows that Princess Celestia is the only alicorn that ever existed. Nopony even knows where she came from. How else could a single pony control something as strong as the moon?”

Rainbow shook her head. “It doesn’t say, but it’s what the ponies of old thought to be true. They also believed that Celestia fought her when she refused to lower the moon out of jealousy, and took control of it after she banished Nightmare Moon with—” She stopped flipping through the pages when a large, full page illustration of six different colored jewels caught her eye. Familiarity tugged at her thoughts, but from a source well beyond her sight. A frown pulled at her lips as she read the caption. “The Elements of Spirit? But I thought . . .”

“Hey, are you gonna help me with all of these, or what?” Thorn asked, tapping his paw on the floor. “Don’t tell me you’re going to run off reading again.”

A swift motion of Rainbow’s hand shut the book with a satisfying thud. She paid no mind to the grumpy griffon as she walked passed him and started sorting through the ocean of magazines, paperbacks and textbooks.

“Finally,” Thorn said. His arms uncrossed and he started to turn back to his own pile.

Rainbow ignored him and focused on her search. She slid several copies of Starswirl’s Severance to the side and growled to herself when the book she wanted wasn’t there. A half-dozen black and red renditions of Gemini’s Grimoire were tossed atop a leaning stack of General Firefly biographies and still the book she sought out evaded her. Regret started to well up in Rainbow’s chest as she realized she really shouldn’t have put off the returns for so long. She might never find the right book in this mess.

“Thorn, do you know where that old copy of Predictions and Prophecies went?” she asked after staring at the pile for a long moment.

“It’s not still in your room with half of the other Starswirlian textbooks?” Thorn said, sliding several books onto a shelf over his head. “Because if it’s not, then I don’t know. Check the Ps, I guess.”

Rainbow groaned and stood back up. Her room was an absolute clutter of books and loose papers; if she’d misplaced something in there, it could take hours to find it—if not days. “Are you sure it’s not out here? I wrote that report over a year ago.”

Thorn looked up from the shelf with a deadpan expression on his face. “You still have the library’s entire collection of Solar Flare books up there.”

“Well, yeah . . .” Suddenly, the back of Rainbow’s neck felt quite itchy. She scratched it as she eyed a crack in the floor. “There’s a difference, though. I still read those.”

“She’s not real, you know,” Thorn huffed, crossing his arms. “Maybe if you made some actual friends you’d have a crush on a real pony.”

Rainbow’s jaw dropped as the griffon’s words struck home. Her cheeks felt like they’d caught fire as her wings flared open—purely in shock, of course, Rainbow knew. She balled her fists and stamped her hoof on the ground. “For the last time, Thorn, I do not have a crush on Solar Flare! It’s perfectly normal for me to identify with Featherfree, so just drop it!”

“Sure thing,” Thorn snorted and rolled his eyes. “And Featherfree being Solar Flare’s primary love interest has nothing to do with it, right?”

“Of course not! It’s purely because Featherfree is intelligent and empathetic!” Rainbow crossed her arms. “Solar Flare, heroic and magically talented though she may be, isn’t real, and it would be silly to develop romantic attachment to her.”

There wasn’t a muscle on Thorn’s face that moved as he looked at her with accusing eyes. “I hear you at night, you know,” he said dryly. “When you think I’m asleep.”

Rainbow wanted to die as his implication struck home. In fact, she felt she just might if her face got any hotter—it felt like it was about to burst into flames at any moment! She shifted her gaze away from Thorn’s steely eyes and cleared her throat. “I-I have no idea what you’re talking about . . .” she said lamely.

“You really need to make some friends.”

Rainbow brought a hand to her face and pinched the bridge of her nose as she closed her eyes and tried to fight off the heat in her cheeks. “We’ve already discussed this, Thorn. I don’t need friends. I have little enough free time as it is without wasting it on . . . on whatever ponies do when they do things together.”

“Have fun, you mean?” Thorn said, raising an eyebrow.

“I have plenty of fun!” Rainbow said with a snap of her tail. “Now help me find Predictions and Prophecies! It could be astronomically important to the security of Equestria!”

The frown on Thorn’s face only deepened as Rainbow began rifling through pile of returns again. “Sure,” he said dryly. He shook his head and started combing through another pile, muttering to himself.

Rainbow turned her attention back to the mountain of books in front of her, then shifted her gaze to the dozens of other piles dotting the library. If the one she was looking for was lost somewhere in the returns pile, it could be days before she found it. She sighed as she felt the first cold fingers of defeat begin to wrap themselves around her stomach. They didn’t manage to hold on for long, though, as a chorus of knocks echoed off the door below the loft.

“Ugh,” Rainbow groaned, letting her head fall back. “Thorn, can you get that please?

“I thought you wanted me to look for your book?” Thorn said, sliding a thick purple book onto the shelf. It slammed off the back of the book case with a violent thud.

Rainbow’s eye twitched. “Fine,” she said stiffly, getting back to her hooves. “But you’d better watch your tone, mister.” The knocking returned, this time to a happy tune Rainbow couldn’t quite remember the name of. She glared down at the door between the balusters of the railing. “I’m coming! Geeze!”

Taking the red carpeted stairs two at a time, Rainbow made her way to the door. Whomever was on the other side obviously hadn’t heard her, because another quick burst of rapping flooded the library. Rainbow cursed to herself and wondered what the rush could possibly be. If it couldn’t wait mere moments—and the ponies knocking felt the urge to disrupt the tranquility of one of the few remaining bastions of study in Canterlot—then surely this was a matter of utmost importance. Perhaps Princess Celestia had an urgent need for her?

The thought put an extra kick in her step.

Rainbow pulled the door open, expecting to see muscular stallions in bright gold armor. Instead, two mares about her age stood there with smiles nearly as bright as the sunlight pouring down from the cloudless sky. Each of them held a small package covered in decorative wrapping paper and tied off with a bright ribbon.

“There you are, Rainbow Dash!” the violet one said, brushing a loose strand of her jasmine mane out of her eyes. “We’ve been looking all over for you!”

The door handle suddenly felt slicker in Rainbow’s grip. She recognized these girls from Celestia’s School for Gifted Pegasi. Cloud Kicker and her pearly-white friend—Blossomforth, if she remembered right—were both in her meteorology class. “. . .You have?” she asked slowly, wondering with a pang of anxiousness if perhaps Cloud Kicker had finally run out of mares to flirt with in their class. “Why?”

“Lightning Dust is having a little get together in the west castle courtyard,” Blossomforth said with a grin. She jiggled the gift in her hands as her tail waved excitedly. “You wanna come?”

“Is that Blossomforth?” Thorn called down, leaning almost entirely over the balcony with his paws on the bottom rail of the railing.

Rainbow found herself stumbling backward as Blossomforth forced her head through the doorway. She narrowed her eyes and shot a glare at the back of the offending pegasus’s head, but nobody seemed to notice.

“You bet, Thorn!” Blossomforth called back. “And Cloud too! You coming?”

Thorn nodded from his perch on the railing. He gave Rainbow a knowing smirk before turning his attention back to Blossomforth. “Yeah! I’ll be right down!”

That little miscreant! Rainbow balled her fists and huffed. Well, if Thorn thought he was going to force her to go to some random party for a pony she hardly knew, he had another thing coming! Standing on the railing was just the icing on the cake. But she’d deal with him in a moment.

“I’m so sorry,” Rainbow said quickly, latching ahold of the door again and using her other hand to usher Blossomforth back out. The white mare shuffled backwards with a surprised squeak, stumbling over her hooves until she was caught in a pair of violet arms. “We’re too busy to go anywhere right now. Lots of studying to do. You know how it is.”

Cloud Kicker frowned, still holding onto Blossomforth, who didn’t seem at all thrilled with the placement of her friend’s hands. “But we’re on a break . . .”

“Lots of returns to put away too!” Rainbow barked, letting the door close with a small crash. She pressed her back into it and groaned before sliding down to the floor. Those two hadn’t been around for two minutes, and she already felt tired. Why did other ponies have to be so exhausting?

Thorn appeared a moment later, walking out of the kitchen door with a bright teal package and a smile that faded the moment he saw Rainbow. “Seriously?” he said, shaking his head.

“We have work to do!” Rainbow said firmly, sliding her glasses back up her nose. “And you still need to find—” she paused for a moment, finally registering the gift the griffon held in his little claws. “What’s that for?”

Thorn sighed and tossed the package onto one of the plush red chairs that decorated the library. “It was a gift for Lightning Dust.”

“You bought her a gift?” Rainbow asked. She raised an eyebrow. “You’ve barely said two words to her all year.”

“You bought her a gift.” Thorn crossed his arms. “And what does that have to do with anything? If you’re invited, it means she likes you. You should go.”

It was during times like this that Thorn’s griffon heritage worked to his advantage. Those predatory eyes seemed to pierce Rainbow’s very soul. Rainbow responded by standing back up and brushing the dust off of her sweater vest, followed by her pants. “I’m not comfortable with you buying ponies gifts in my name, Thorn,” she said after a long moment. Drawing herself back up, Rainbow took a few steps forward and set a hand on Thorn’s shoulder. “The only friends I need—the only ones I want—are you and the Canterlot Library. Okay?”

Thorn set his jaw. If he was bigger, it might have even looked threatening, but Rainbow thought he looked about as dangerous as a kitten. “That’s not normal, Rainbow. Seriously, why am I being the rational one here? You’re like eight years older than me!”

“I’m done discussing this,” Rainbow said, taking her hand off Thorn’s shoulder and starting for the stairs to the loft. “Now come on, I want to find Predictions and Prophecies as quickly as possible.” She could hear the exasperated sigh from the foot of the stairs, but she chose to ignore it.

A few moments after Rainbow reached the top of the landing, the soft patter of paws bounding up the stairs followed her. Thorn passed her a moment later, tossing her a tired look before making his way back to the pile he’d been working on. Rainbow couldn’t help but smile a little. Her little griffon’s blustering sometimes made him hard to live with, but she couldn’t deny that it was hiding a heart of gold—even if that heart never wanted to let her live her life the way she wanted to live it.

It took nearly an hour, but Rainbow and Thorn managed to make their way through the largest part of the “M” section before breakfast time rolled around. Thorn eventually softened up and started humming to himself while they worked, and Rainbow found herself swaying to the melody. She slid a copy of The Hound of Bakerville into its place and reached to grab the next return when Thorn stopped humming to let out a triumphant “Ah-hah!”

Rainbow looked up as the cub waved around a deep blue book with a series of stars decorating the cover. Thorn smirked ran a talon across the title. “Predictions and Prophecies by Nostradockus. Am I good, or what?”

Rainbow’s eyes widened, and she jumped to her hooves with a quick flap of her wings. “You found it?” She leaped over a stack of books and seized the text from Thorn’s hands with a hungry look in her eyes. The cover was cool from laying on the floor all morning, but Rainbow could still make out the faded stain on the spine from when she’d spilled her coffee on it during a late-night study session. “Perfect!”

“You’re welcome,” Thorn grunted as he settled back onto his knees and grabbed another book.

What page was it on again? Rainbow wondered as she flipped the book open to the Table of Contents. Elements . . . E . . . E . . . Ah, there we go! With a practiced ease, Rainbow rifled through the pages until a picture of six round stones appeared. “The Elements of Spirit!” she said with a quick nod to herself. However, a quick scan of the page caused a frown to grow on her face. “See The Mare in the Moon?”

“And you’re still chasing fairytales . . .” Thorn grumbled so quietly that Rainbow almost didn’t hear him. She cast him a stern look to ensure that he knew she most certainly had.

The Mare in the Moon? Rainbow clicked her tongue as she stared at the page. She hoped the book was redirecting her internally. If it wanted her to find an entirely separate volume, she’d have to begin her search all over again. The very thought was enough to give her a stomach ache.

The Table of Contents provider Rainbow with some relief, however, as it casually informed her that the entry she was looking for was on page three hundred twenty-four. “The Mare in the Moon,” said, loud enough to make sure that Thorn couldn’t ignore her. “Myth from olden times. A powerful alicorn who once tried to seize control of Equestria during a coup d'etat and imprisoned on the moon for her treason. Legend has it that, on the longest day of the thousandth year, the stars will aid in her escape and she will bring about nighttime eternal!” Rainbow punctuated her reading by snapping the book shut with one hand.

“Thorn, take a letter.”

The griffon in question sighed. “To who?”

“To whom,” Rainbow said automatically, setting Predictions and Prophecies down on a table. The big floor-to-ceiling windows on the loft held a perfect view of Canterlot Castle as several ponies carrying wrapped gifts made their way inside. She walked up to it and watched the central tower. “To Princess Celestia.”

“Seriously? It’s the first day of summer break, Rainbow, and she’s pretty busy getting ready for the Summer Sun Celebration.” A few more thuds announced the arrival of several books back into their homes. “Don’t you think we should give Princess Celestia a little time to—”

“We don’t have time, Thorn.” Rainbow bit her lip. “Don’t you get it? Tomorrow is the Summer Sun Celebration. The longest day of the year.” Bile build up in the back of Rainbow’s throat, and she swallowed thickly. “The thousandth year. If Princess Celestia isn’t warned—”

“—The Boogeymare’s gonna get her?” Thorn snorted. “Come on, Rainbow Dash. You’re smarter than that.”

Rainbow felt her ears slick back. As much as she didn’t like to admit it, she had been known to overthink things from time to time. This time was different though, she could feel it in her gut. Something big was about to happen. “Look, Thorn, I understand that it’s far-fetched, but I’d still rather send a letter than not. There’s no shame in being prepared.”

“This coming from the girl who let the return stock get to this point.” Thorn gestured around the library. “But fine,” he said, walking over to a desk and readying a piece of stationary. “What is it you want to say?”

A smile made its way onto Rainbow’s face as Thorn dutifully scribed her thoughts. The parallels between the tale of Nightmare Moon and the prophecy of the Mare in the Moon created a cold ball in the pit of Rainbow’s stomach, but she did her best to keep her message factual. It had taken years of tutoring and corrections, but she’d finally learned how to take her own emotions out of the picture when writing. The facts were all that mattered, and the facts were all she reported.

It still didn’t feel right, though. Especially when she considered the Elements of Spirit. The very thought of the long lost weapons of Equestria seemed to pull at some strange core of her being. It made her feel giddy and anxious all at once—like destiny itself was plucking at the strings.

Rainbow shook her head. Princess Celestia wouldn’t accept that as evidence. It was anecdotal at best, and mere paranoia at worst. The legends were there, and they were worth consideration, that was all.

Thorn clicked his beak as he finished up, tapping his paw on the floor. “Impera . . . Imperi . . . Impereh. . .” He sighed and shook his head.

“Conjugate, Thorn,” Rainbow mumbled as she stared at the castle gates. “You can do it.” Have there always been this many guards on patrol? she wondered, tapping a finger on her chin. The gate normally only ever had one or two golden-armored guardsmen stationed outside. Now there were five—two on each side, and one in the entryway, cheerfully tipping his helmet to the ponies passing by. Rainbow’s wings fluttered for a moment before she forced herself to roll her eyes. Of course. Celestia’s raising the sun in public tomorrow. Duh.

A big tourist event, that’s all it was.

“Can I get a hint at least?” Thorn whined. “All of the dictionaries are downstairs under about five hundred copies of Pony Magazine!”

Yes, just a big tourist event. Besides, the extra guards would be good news anyway. It meant extra security even if Princess Celestia wrote off her warning like Thorn had. Not that she would, she was sure.

“. . .Rainbow?”

“You’re pronouncing it wrong,” Rainbow told him, blinking hard. “It’s im-pair-AH-tive, not im-pair-IH-tive.” She looked away from the window for a moment to give him a reassuring smile. “If you jump to conclusions without checking the facts, you’re likely to assume the wrong thing. You spelled it with an I, didn’t you?”

Thorn looked down at the parchment, then back up at her. “. . .No . . .” he said quietly as she turned back toward the window.

Rainbow couldn’t help but chuckle as she heard the frantic swishing and scratching of the quill on the scroll. “It’s fine, Thorn. That’s how you learn.”

“I’d learn a lot faster if you just told me how to spell it in the first place,” he grumbled. A long, scraping sound came from the sheet, followed by a sharp tap! and Rainbow knew he had finished signing the letter. “Anything else?” he asked, sliding the scroll into a plastic tube that hung from his belt. “Wanna remind her to watch out for wereponies while we’re at it?”

Rainbow rolled her eyes, but gave him a smile. “No, not today, Thorn. Just get it to her quickly.” Then, for good measure, she added: “If you hurry, we might have time to get ice cream today.”

“Ice cream?” The griffon’s eyes widened, and the cap on the tube was latched into place in record time. “Can we get rocky trail?”

“Maybe,” Rainbow answered in a sing-song voice. She pretended to inspect her fingernails while she watched Thorn’s tail flick in excitement. Of course he’d get rocky trail—even if it took him all day to get back. But he didn’t need to know that. “I guess it all depends on how fast you get back here with Princess Celestia’s response.”

Thorn grinned at that. “I’ll be back before you even know I’m gone!” he declared as he raced for the window and wrenched it open. He hesitated as the breeze rushed in and gently blew across his fringe. “You do realize you sound completely crazy, right?”

“Princess Celestia has the utmost faith in me, Thorn,” Rainbow said. Her wings suddenly felt very cramped, so she stretched them out as she rubbed her shoulder. “In all the years she’s been my mentor, she’s never once doubted me. If she trusts me that much, then I should extend the same courtesy to myself.”

At least, that’s what she says . . .

Thorn still looked uneasy, but he hoisted himself up on the window sill and nodded. “Alright . . .” He adjusted the tube on his belt one last time. “If you’re sure. I’ll see you in a little while.” There was a flash of brown and red, and then Thorn vanished from the window. A blur raced past the picture windows, soaring toward the castle with the grace of an eagle.

Rainbow sighed and bit her lip. The face of Predictions and Prophecies looked back at her from its spot on the table. The starry decorations sent a chill down her spine—they looked just as white-hot and angry as the glow in Nightmare Moon’s eyes. She shook her head and turned back to the rest of the returns. Her wings seemed to grow much heavier as she realized she was now left to take care of them all by herself.

Technically, the library was closed in observance of the Summer Sun Celebration. Rainbow could put off the work until tomorrow, if she really wanted to. She could at least wait until Thorn got back. If Princess Celestia herself hadn’t trusted her with maintaining the library, she probably would have—she’d already put them off this long, after all—but she refused to let her teacher down; the princess was like a second mother to her, though Rainbow would never be so assuming as to say that out loud.

The thought made Rainbow’s lip curl as she approached the largest of the stacks. The library melted away, and the white stones of a castle wall decorated with Wonderbolts posters replaced it. Princess Celestia towered over Rainbow with a gentle smile, her mane billowing in a magical breeze. It’s time to clean your room, Rainbow Dash, she tittered. Put your books and toys away.

Rainbow’s hand closed around a bright red book. In one swift motion, she checked the title and slid it onto one of the waist-high shelves that decorated the central floor of the loft. A couple more became its neighbor, and Rainbow was relieved to notice that Thorn had taken the time to organize the piles by section. At least she wasn’t going to be forced to run around the library all day.

She fell back into a rhythm, and the first pile slowly faded away. The ball in her gut loosened, and Rainbow eventually found herself humming the same song Thorn had been humming earlier. When she finished the first pile, she moved on to the next waist-high shelf.

The morning puttered on with little else bothering Rainbow except for the growling of her stomach that told her she’d forgotten to eat breakfast again. She thought about going down to the kitchen as she moved on to the rolling ladder book case, but elected not to. It was nearly lunchtime anyway, so she grabbed another book and started back for the top shelf.

“I thought you were supposed to be awful at flying?”

Rainbow yelped and smashed her head off the ceiling. The book fell out of her grasp, and her wings became stiff as wood. She dropped to the floor, and pain exploded in her tail—then on her head again as Daring Do and the Sapphire Statue got its revenge for being forsaken in the air and knocked her glasses askew. A snort of laughter reached her ears, and she fixed her gaze on Thorn as she rubbed her poor scalp. “That wasn’t funny!”

“It looked pretty funny to me.” The brown and white blob that was Thorn turned away and pulled the window closed. “Besides, I thought you’d be expecting me.”

The world regained its clarity as Rainbow fixed her glasses. She shifted her gaze to the Daring Do book beside her and sighed when she saw that the hardcover had bent. She wasn’t particularly fascinated with the stories of the treasure hunter, but it was always disappointing to see fresh damage on a book. “You haven’t been gone that long,” she said, running her finger along the new crease. “Have you?”

“Almost two hours.” Thorn shrugged. “Princess Celestia was pretty busy in the castle.” He unclipped the tube from his belt and raised it in his claw for Rainbow to see. “She did have a few minutes to write back, though.”

Rainbow’s ears perked up immediately, and the pain in her head seemed to vanish just as fast. “Great!” she said, sitting up and tossing the book back into the returns pile. She leaped to her hooves and hurried over to Thorn’s side. “I knew she’d want to take immediate action!”

“Lemme open the tube, and I’ll tell you.”

Rainbow nodded. The ball was back in her stomach, and it was filling her with nervous energy. She caught herself pacing in front of the picture window, but she kept going anyway. She’ll probably need me to do something to help preparations, but what? It wasn’t very likely that the princess would ask Rainbow to fight. Willing as she was when she was a filly, she had to concede with the armsmaster that Rainbow had no business holding a blade. Especially after she’d nearly impaled herself on it.

“My dearest Rainbow Dash,” Thorn’s voice cut through her thoughts. ”You know that I admire your dedication to your studies, and that I trust you implicitely.” There was a brief pause, followed by a quick snort. Rainbow whipped her head around to see Thorn struggling to keep a straight face. ”But you must tear tear yourself away from those dusty old books!”

Rainbow’s wings flared violently. “What?!” she barked, setting her hands on the table with a little more force than she’d meant to. Several books slid off and hit the floor with a series of heavy thuds. “She didn’t say that!”

“It’s right here in black and white,” Thorn said with a shrug. There was a twinkle in his eye that made Rainbow clench her teeth. He held the paper out to her. “See for yourself.”

The cold ball in the pit of Rainbow’s stomach grew even colder. “N-no,” she said, looking down at the pile of spilled books and biting her lip. “Just keep reading.”

”There is far more to a young pony’s life than nonstop studying, so I’m sending you to supervise the preparations for this year’s Summer Sun Celebration—”

“Seriously?” Rainbow dragged her hands down her face and let herself fall into a chair at the table. The floor screeched in protest as the chair legs slid back. “Why can’t Penny Wise do that?” What good was there in having a Royal Steward if she couldn’t even plan a party?

”And I have an even more essential task for you to complete . . .” Thorn peered over the scroll with a victorious look in his beady eyes. ”Make some friends!”

Bang!

Bang-bang!

Bang-bang-bang-bang-bang!

“Let me in!” Rainbow shrieked, slamming her fist on the great bronze door.

Bang!

This wasn’t happening. This couldn’t be happening! It was bad enough that Princess Celestia had completely written off her warning—at least that was understandable. Rainbow could even see the viewpoint that she might be a little too studious, though she didn’t agree with it. But sending guards to lock her out of the library? Had Princess Celestia gone insane?

Rainbow slammed her shoulder into the door, panting heavily. “Let me in!”

“Hey, I think I saw it move,” Thorn said from behind her. He’d been leaning against the wall of the vestibule ever since the guards had arrived, and he hadn’t so much as lifted a claw to help her. “Maybe one more?”

If Rainbow had still had the energy, she might have told him off. For the moment, though, she was too busy trying to catch her breath. A dirty glare was the best she could muster without her words to back her up.

“Come on, Rainbow,” he chuckled. “Can’t you go one day without the library?”

“No!” Rainbow growled back through gritted teeth. “Not when it’s possible that Equestria could be in danger!”

Thorn sighed and pulled himself off the wall. “You’ve already told Princess Celestia, and she didn’t seem too worried. Besides, if there were any books in there that could help, she would have told you about them.”

“Unless she forgot,” Rainbow said, snapping her wings. She brushed her mane out of her face, bitterly thinking that the guards could have at least let her grab her comb. Or her Backpack. Luckily, she kept her wallet by the door, so she’d been able to quickly stuff that in her back pocket while she was being ushered outside. “Princess Celestia has a once-in-a-millennia nation-wide celebration to organize before tomorrow morning. It’s entirely possible that her priorities have been skewed by her workload.”

“She wouldn’t be the only one,” Thorn muttered.

Rainbow’s ears twitched. She back toward the griffon curiously. “Hmm? Did you say something?”

Thorn shook his head. “Forget it. Look, you heard the guards—they’re not allowed to let you back in until sundown. You might as well do what the Princess asked.”

“Don’t be absurd, Thorn.” Rainbow waved her hand and turned away from the door. Down the steps, the streets of Canterlot were bustling with ponies rushing about in the bright, hot sun. By all accounts, it was a beautiful day, without a cloud in sight. There was even a lovely breeze blowing through the city. “I’d never disobey Princess Celestia. It’s just that all this is so . . .” Rainbow clenched her fists at her sides as she searched for the right word. “Frustrating,” she decided. “Let’s just check-in with the catering company quickly, and get it over with.”

After making sure her shirt was still tucked in her pants, Rainbow walked down the steps and into the sunlight. She was right, it was hot. Almost too hot; maybe her usual sweatervest wasn’t as great a choice as she’d assumed this morning. She pulled at the collar and sighed. Too late to fix it now, she thought ruefully.

The sound of fluttering wings pulled Rainbow out of her thoughts, and she saw Thorn touch down next to her. He easily fell in line by her side without missing a step. “Why quickly?” he asked. “The guards won’t let us back in until dusk—we’ve got all day whether we like it or not.”

“Because, Thorn,” Rainbow said, the ghost of a smile dancing on her cheeks. “It’s not like the Royal Canterlot Library is the only library in the city. There are at least a dozen more that I can use today. I don’t need to use ours.”

“But then when will you make friends like the princess said?” Thorn’s voice, scratchy as it was, held trace hints of a childish whine to it.

They turned onto Solar Street, and Rainbow caught a look at the line forming at the edge of the castle grounds. Most of them would be tourists, she knew, but she caught the occasional gift-wrapped package among the crowd. Lightning Dust’s party must have been going full-swing. What a waste of time.

“She said to supervise preparations for the Summer Sun Celebration,” Rainbow said. “I’m her student, and I’m happy to do my royal duty, but the safety of Equestria does not rely on my social life.”

“Or lack thereof.”

Rainbow chose to ignore his comment. Instead, she focused on forging a path through the throngs of ponies making their way up and down the sidewalks. It wasn’t easy, as most of them seemed to be going toward the castle, and were too excited to get out of the way. A gaggle of cheering foals, taking full advantage of the first day of summer vacation, eagerly raced past her with bright sun-sticks and magical whistling sparklers. One dropped a magi-cracker on the ground and squealed in delight as it erupted into a puff of bright yellow light and streamers.

“This is absolutely ridiculous,” Rainbow grumbled, peeling a strip of golden ribbon off of her sweater. “Nopony celebrates when Princess Celestia raises the sun on any other day.”

“Don’t pretend you don’t want one of those magi-crackers for yourself,” Thorn said with a smirk, ducking around a street vendor hawking fireworks. “Just because you can’t lock yourself up in the library doesn’t mean you have to make sure your whole day is ruined.”

Rainbow sighed and shrugged. Thorn wasn’t exactly wrong—she could still feel her inner filly longing to rush around and wreak havoc. Being brought before Princess Celestia for blowing up trees and crashing into the gardens during stunt practices, however, had given Rainbow a firm hold on that reckless foal’s antics that she would never release again. In fact, she thought, it might just be time to have the same talk with Thorn. He’s been getting awfully restless lately.

The streets of the Cloud District only became more difficult to navigate as they left the castle behind them. Hundreds of ponies choked the cobblestone pathways and storefronts, laughing and chatting happily. Rainbow wondered if they all planned on attending the ceremony at the castle in the evening. There was no way they’d be able to fit in the courtyard—let alone see the Princess atop the Sun Balcony.

It wasn’t as if weaving through crowds was new for Rainbow, but it was tedious and tiring. The constant ducking and dodging and “excuse mes” were bad enough, but tripping over hooves and watching out for careless wing-fluttering only made things far harder than they had to be. More than once, she caught a fierce glare from somepony as she stepped on their tail, or interrupted a conversation by darting between them.

“Stay close, Thorn,” Rainbow said. “I don’t want you getting lost in this mess.” She looked to her side for the young griffon, and felt a chill race down her spine when he was nowhere to be found. “Thorn? Thorn?!” Where was that cub?

Cursing her height, Rainbow twisted herself around a large red stallion and made her way to the middle of the street as she called for Thorn. She earned a few curious glances, but nopony came to her aid. One or two gave her a wide berth as they walked by, tails flicking as they smiled awkwardly.

That’s it! Rainbow decided, pushing past a group of giggling mares. I don’t care how much he hates it, he’s holding my hand from now on!

There was a flash of brown in the corner of her eye, and Rainbow whipped her head around just in time to see Thorn’s tail vanish around the corner of a book store. A huge group of ponies had rallied around the street corner. They all seemed to be watching something—or someone, rather—and Thorn was making right for them with an eager grin. Rainbow groaned and started after him.

“Thorn!” she shouted over the chaos. “Thorn, get back over here!”

“Step right up! Step right up!” somepony was yelling over the crowd. “Come forth and witness the majesty of the Great and Powerful Trixie!” There was a boom like a thunderclap, then light exploded over the crowd as streaks of red and blue fell around them. They mixed with pinks and purples, flowing and twirling through the air like fiery petals.

Dozens of people watched, slack jawed, as one of the blazing sparks fell into the outstretched hands of a little filly. Rainbow winced, but the filly grinned and closed her hands around it. Immediately, they started glowing. The grin on her face turned into puzzlement, then wonder as she opened her hands and a bright yellow canary poked its head out and chirped at her.

The crowd went wild with applause, and an azure unicorn pulled a pointed purple hat off of her head and bowed. Her cape, Rainbow noticed, had the same starry pattern as her hat, but she didn’t recognize this particular street performer from the Cloud District. Dozens of gold coins were gleefully tossed on her makeshift stage as she stood back up.

“Thank you! Thank you!” the mare called out, kissing her hands. “The Great and Powerful Trixie simply adores her fans!” She cheered, spun around once, and unleashed another shower of sparks.

Thorn’s wings quivered as he craned over the shoulder of an older filly with bright pink hair. “That was amazing!” he exclaimed. “I’ve never seen a unicorn do anything like that before!”

Rainbow shook her head and chuckled. “That’s because most unicorns aren’t impressed by a couple of simple illusion spells, Thorn.” She rested a hand on his shoulder and gently pulled him back toward the edge of the crowd. “Come on. We have a lot of work to do.”

“But we’ve got all day! Just a few more minutes!” Thorn groaned, looking back toward the stage. “I’ve never seen a magic show before!”

“Trust me, you aren’t missing anything,” Rainbow reassured him. “All she’s going to do is shine a few lights around.”

The crowd seemed to have thickened in there mere minute or two they’d been standing there, and Rainbow had to step carefully around an elderly mare with a cane. Unfortunately, the Great and Powerful Trixie chose just that moment to launch another deluge of lights into the air. Thorn’s eyes shone as they began their slow descent back to earth, and Rainbow was helpless to do anything as his paw caught on the wrinkled old woman’s cane.

“Woah!” Thorn stumbled forward and crashed into Rainbow. He windmilled, thrashing his arms and wings around like a wild turkey. His arm jerked itself clean out of Rainbow’s hand, and he whipped his tail around to right himself with the fabled grace of the griffons.

Rainbow, however, wasn’t quite so lucky. She stumbled backward after Thorn struck her, wings flaring out in a desperate bid to catch herself. Somepony shouted in surprise as she bowled past them. Five—six—seven rushed steps, and her hoof slammed against something hard and wooden, flinging her sideways. The world was a blur of colors and sounds, and Rainbow clenched her eyes shut in anticipation of hitting the cold, unforgiving cobblestone.

What she hit instead, was far softer. Cushy, in fact. And very warm. It wrapped around her, holding her tight across the middle and keeping her aloft. Rainbow’s eyes snapped open, and she was met with the bright purple eyes and gentle smirk of a mulberry unicorn with a mussy coat.

“Walk much?” the unicorn snickered.

A bolt of lightning shot through Rainbow’s body, and she felt her wings snap wide open. Her cheeks were incredibly hot and—oh, Celestia, what was her head pressing against? She quickly pulled herself out of the unicorn’s arms, earning more than a few angry protests as her wings smacked into the heads of those around her. “S-sorry!” she said, swallowing and looking around—for what, she didn’t know. “I was just—and there was this cane—and Thorn fell—and I . . . eh-heh-heh-heh . . .”

The unicorn smiled and waved her hand hand before adjusting her leather jacket. “No sweat. I’m used to mares throwing themselves at me.” She winked, and Rainbow caught a hint of smarmy laughter in her tone. “Nothing new.”

The heat in Rainbow’s cheeks flashed rapidly, then retreated to behind her ears as she balled her fists. “I didn’t—”

“Wow, what a catch!” Thorn’s raspy voice broke through the crowd as he pushed his way past a heavyset stallion carrying several large jam jars. “Do you play hoofball?”

The unicorn snorted. “Hoofball? Please!” She shook her head and placed a hand on her hip. “I’m more hands-on than that! Mixed Magic Arts is where the real action is.”

Thorn’s face lit up. “You fight?” His tail cracked like a whip.

“Among other things.”

Rainbow grimaced as she tried to pull her wings against her back and found them unwilling to fold. “Yes, well, thank you for your help,” she said, setting her hoof on Thorn’s shoulder. Something about this unicorn twisted her stomach in knots, and the young griffon was already excitable enough without encouragement from a fighter. “Come on, Thorn. We’ve got to get going.”

“But she just helped us!” Thorn protested, pulling away from Rainbow and giving her a pleading look. “Princess Celestia said you need to make new friends—why don’t you give it a try?”

The unicorn shifted and scratched the back of her neck. Dark blue strands of hair shifted and flowed around her arm. “Uh . . .”

“Just talk to her!”

Come on, Thorn . . . Don’t make me do this . . .

Thorn stared at her expectantly, tapping his paw on the ground.

Rainbow’s ears pinned themselves to her skull. “I . . .” Her shoulders slumped. “Fine.” She turned to face the unicorn and drew herself up. Thorn was right—she could at least thank her. “Good afternoon. My name is Rainbow Dash, and I appreciate you, uh, catching me?”

Thorn blinked, then groaned into his hand.

The unicorn’s infernal smirk returned. “Heh,” she chuckled, holding out her hand. “Twilight Sparkle.”

Scars and dirt covered Twilight Sparkle’s hand. Around the edges of her wrist, Rainbow could make out the faint outline fur that had been constantly pressed into tight gloves. All wrapped up in a leather jacket and ratty, stained jeans, Twilight Sparkle looked precisely like the type of pony Rainbow Dash had been warned to stay away from when she was a filly.

And yet here she was, swallowing thickly and placing her own hand into this total stranger’s. It felt . . . strange. Twilight’s hand was warm—almost inviting—but as firm as a rock. Memories of shaking hands with the hawkish griffon ambassador floated to the surface of her mind as Twilight grinned at her.

“So, did you like the show?” Twilight asked, twisting out of Rainbow’s grip. She wrapped her arm around Rainbow’s shoulders and gestured up at the stage. “Trixie’s a good friend of mine. She’s been doing stuff like this for awhile, and she was really excited to perform all the way up here in Snooty Central.”

A spasm of pain ripped through Rainbow’s wings as they strained against Twilight’s arm. Rainbow’s thoughts were a blur. The heat rushed back to her face. Nopony had manhandled her this much since flight school! What is she doing? Did Twilight Sparkle just go around grabbing random strangers whenever she felt like it?

Did ponies do that?

“Uh . . . yeah . . .” Rainbow said, tapping her fingers together. “She’s . . .” Average? Elementary? Grandiose? “Something . . .”

Thorn nodded, bouncing on his paws. “She’s something, alright! Can all unicorns do that stuff?”

Twilight waved her hand with a smile. “Well, yeah. Some more easily than others, of course.” She shrugged. “I mean, it wouldn’t be anything for me to do those spells—I’m a magical prodigy after all—but Trixie’s always had a talent for captivating a crowd.”

Rainbow took in Twilight’s disheveled mane and scarred knuckles. There was a small bandage on the unicorn’s cheek that rose and crinkled when the smirk returned to her face. It had been a long time since Princess Celestia had taken Rainbow on a tour of the Royal Magic Academy, but she was fairly certain this mare didn’t fit the bill. She raised her eyebrow. “A magical prodigy, huh?”

“What? You’ve never heard of me?” Twilight actually had the gall to laugh. It send a flash of anger through Rainbow’s veins. “I’ve been tested for the highest IQ on this side of Equestria.” She cleared her throat, then fixed her jacket with her free hand. “It’s one-fifty-eight, by the way. I’m a genius.”

“One-fifty-eight?” Thorn whistled. “Wow! That’s even higher than—”

“Enough!” Rainbow threw Twilight’s arm off of her and pushed her bangs back behind her ears. One-fifty-eight my tail! “Thorn, we have a lot of work to do today. It’s time we get going!”

Twilight shoved her hands in her jacket pockets. The pout she attempted didn’t last very long before another cocksure grin took over. “Aw, and I was having fun, too. Oh, well. I guess I’ll—Shiny?” Suddenly, Twilight’s grin vanished. She paled and stepped back, ears flicking. “Crap!”

Rainbow whirled around to see what had startled her, but there was only the ponies that had gathered to watch Trixie. A pair of royal guards in golden armor were making their way through the crowd. One was large and white; the other was thin and blue. Both had their eyes fixed firmly on the stage.

“What?” Rainbow asked, squinting out past the sun’s reflection of the guards’ armor for something out of the usual. Had somepony gotten hurt? Had this Twilight pony perhaps somehow seen something that hinted at Nightmare Moon’s return? “What did you see?” She turned back around and clenched her teeth when she saw that the mare in the leather jacket had vanished. “Hello?”

Thorn looked around, scratching his head. “Woah. She’s good.”

“Don’t be so sure,” Rainbow said, stretching over the crowd. There were a couple of unicorns mixed in with the cheering earth ponies and flittering pegasi, but none of them had purple coats or wore black leather.

Come to think of it, where had that mare even gotten a leather jacket? It wasn’t like a pony could just walk into any shop in Canterlot and ask for a jacket made of dead animal flesh. The thought sent as shiver down Rainbow’s spine. Deer and cows weren’t exactly on par with the sentient races like ponies, griffons or dragons, but that didn’t excuse outright cruelty. Sure, carnivorous griffons might wear something so crude, but a pony?

And one that called herself a genius?

Hah! Genius? Her? Rainbow shook her head. She doesn’t look like she’s read a book in her life!

“Ah! Ms. Dash!”

A tugging sensation on her sleeve pulled Rainbow out of her head. Thorn pointed toward the crowd with his thumb. One of the guards—the big, muscled white one—had broken off from the other and was making his way toward her.

“Ms. Rainbow Dash! Over—excuse me, ma’am, I’m so sorry!—over here!”

And, just like that, the strange ball that had been sitting in Rainbow’s gut all morning dissolved. She’d know that smile and mop of blue hair anywhere! “Lieutenant Armor!” Finally! Somepony who might actually take her warnings about Nightmare Moon seriously! “What are you doing all the way out here?”

Lieutenant Shining Armor adjusted his golden helmet and pointed up at the stage, where the Great and Powerful Trixie was spinning several sparking disks in the air. “She doesn’t have a permit for all the . . .” He rolled his hand with a frown. BOOM! One of the spinning disks exploded into a shower of multicolored sparks over the crowd. “That,” he finished, gesturing toward the sky.

“It doesn’t look like she’s hurting anypony.”

“She probably won’t.” Shining shrugged, making his entire golden breastplate rise with his shoulders. “But Marshall Flashover isn’t happy about the street being so choked up. Besides, she’s only part of the reason I’m here.”

Rainbow’s ears flicked up. Had she been mistaken about the princess’s disregard for her warning? Was Shining Armor here to tell her about the preparations for Nightmare Moon’s return?

“She is?” Thorn asked. He was still staring up at the lights flashing over the stage. “Then what’s the other reason?”

The smile on Shining’s face gained a hint of wry humor. For a moment, Rainbow thought it looked familiar, but she wasn’t sure why. “I’m supposed to escort you through the city today. The Princess seems to think you might get lost in the crowds and wind up in another library.”

“What?!” Rainbow’s jaw hit the floor. “But—but I—”

“—Was planning to do exactly that,” Thorn deadpanned. His eyes darted back over to Rainbow for a moment, and he chuckled. “Weren’t you?”

Rainbow clenched her teeth. Sometimes, though she would never actually do it, she really wanted nothing more than to give her “little helper” a swift hoof to the back end.

Shining’s eyes narrowed, but lost none of their humor. “That’s what I thought,” he said. He waved a chastising finger at her. “Naughty, naughty, Ms. Dash.”

I’ll show you naughty, Rainbow thought bitterly. Just let me at a few of those magi-cracker’s Trixie’s playing with.

“And what about Nightmare Moon?” Rainbow demanded, crossing her arms. “Are we just going to let her waltz into Canterlot and take over Equestria?”

“Nightmare Moon?” Shining raised an eyebrow. “You mean, like from the Nightmare Night legend?”

“Well, of course it sounds stupid when you put it like that!” Rainbow balled her fists. She’d been so sure that at least Shining Armor would believe her. She didn’t know him very well, true, but he’d always been the one Princess Celestia called on when Rainbow needed a guard. He’d escorted her to conventions and lectures all over the city, and he took his duties very seriously. Surely the mere [possibility of a threat against Equestria would have been worth investigation!

Thorn snorted. “How else can you put it? You said yourself that you know how ridiculous it sounds.”

“But that doesn’t change the fact that there’s a real chance that I’m right!”

Shining frowned and shifted in his armor. “Well, just how real are we talking?”

“Just ignore her,” Thorn said, shaking his head. He rubbed his temples with his fingers. “She’s just steamed that Princess Celestia didn’t believe her. I don’t think she knows how to be wrong.”

A flash of anger exploded in Rainbow’s chest, and her wings flared open. Somepony behind her yelped in surprise, but her eyes were fixed firmly on Thorn. She opened her mouth to scold him, but a loud shriek flooded the street before she could start.

“Unhand, Trixie, you fool!”

Rainbow whipped her head around just in time to see the little blue guard take a backhand straight to the nose. He flew backward, stumbled off the stage, and landed square in a merchant’s stall. It buckled under his weight, and the sidewalk flooded with pink juice and bright green rinds.

“My watermelons!” an earth pony howled as the guard disentangled himself from the splintered remains of his fruit stand. “I’ll be talking to the Princess about this!”

Shining sighed. “So much for asking politely.”

“Hmph!” Trixie marched across her stage with her nose held high, grabbing sets fireworks and spinning disks. She stuffed them indiscriminately into a large purple backpack, and Rainbow couldn’t help but wonder why anypony would be so careless with so many explosives—or with any explosives, for that matter.

The blue guard climbed the stage again. His golden armor was now dripping with juice, and a large chunk of watermelon had gotten tangled in the yellow strands of his tail. This time, he drew his sword as he advanced on Trixie and shouted something Rainbow didn’t quite catch.

“It’s funny, really,” Shining commented as Trixie shrieked again. “He’ll have to arrest her now that she’s assaulted a guard.”

“Cool!” Thorn exclaimed, sticking his head between the two ponies in front of him. “Can we stay and watch?”

“Absolutely not!” Rainbow said. It was bad enough he’d seen Trixie strike the guard—there was no way she was going to let her already excitable cub watch a live arrest.

Shining nodded. “Good. We need to get going anyway. Sweet Apple Vineyard is practically outside the city, and these crowds aren’t going to make walking there very easy.”

“Trixie said no touching!”

Rainbow tangled her fingers into the feathers on the back of Thorn’s neck and pulled gently. He stiffened immediately. “Come on, Thorn. This way.”

“Aw, man . . .” Thorn grumbled as another resounding slap echoed from the center of the crowd. “You never let me do what I want . . .”

Better Than Flying

Author's Note

I've been going through my Gdocs and investigating all of my old stories both for personal and artistic inspiration, and I found this old thing.

Better than Flying was started in late 2011—shortly after I finished Trust and shortly before I started work on Elements of Chaos, but it never came to be for one reason or another. Those among you who recognize anything about my style will realize just how old it is by the presence of my old underscores.

This was going to tell the story of how Rainbow Dash found out Scootaloo can't fly after taking her out to a Wonderbolts Rally. She would have spent a few days trying to teach Scoots before realizing that it was a lost cause. Then, she was going to try to cheer Scootaloo up by looking for an alternative. In other words, this was going to be the story of how Scootaloo got her Scooter.

It probably won't ever be finished, but I think the intro is cute, so into the bucket it goes.

Better Than Flying

Some Things Are Better Than Flying
By: The_Incredible_Blunderbolt

“A-Are you s-sure th-this is a g-good idea, Scootaloo?” a white filly with a purple and pink mane stuttered. She looked fearfully down at the ground, it seemed like it was miles below her.

Scootaloo groaned while she secured her rope around the chimney of the town hall. “It is if you wanna get your cutie mark for window washing!” She glanced over to her friend by the ledge. “I know I’m tired of being a blank flank. Aren’t you?”

The unicorn’s teeth chattered as she clung to the board she was on for dear life. “Muh-maybe not having a cutie mark isn’t so bad? I mean, Rarity says I should just be patient and wait for it...”

“But everypony else already has theirs!” Scootaloo cried. “We’re the only two in the whole school who don’t! You can’t back out now!”

Sweetie Belle looked over the edge of her platform again, she was awfully high up. This felt dangerous. Really dangerous. The only ponies she’d ever seen as high up as this were pegasus ponies like Rainbow Dash or Cloud Kicker. The sky was no place for unicorns! Especially filly unicorns who could barely even lift a quill with their magic! What would happen if she fell down? Images of Rarity ranting about proper safety to her tombstone filled her mind.

Looking back over to her orange friend, Sweetie Belle gulped. “You’ll catch me if I fall, right?”

“Of course I will!” she said. She gestured to the assortment of knots around her body. “That’s what the rope’s for!”

Which one? Sweetie wanted to ask. She didn’t exactly have full faith in Scootaloo’s knot tying skills. The entire roof of the building was littered with lines of all shapes and sizes. Some were secured to the small wooden platform she stood upon, a few were tied to each other, and a couple looped the chimney. Most of the ropes ended at Scootaloo herself, making her look like some kind of walking rope monster.

“Ready?” the pegasus filly asked.

Against her better judgement, Sweetie nodded yes. Scootaloo picked up one of the numerous lengths of cord with a big smile on her face. Slowly, she walked away from her friend while the reels on the ledge of the roof hoisted Sweetie Belle into the air and over the side of the building.

Aside from the initial panic Sweetie was sure anypony would get from being swung wildly about so high in the air, she found that hanging over the side of the town hall wasn’t so bad. In fact, she had a great view of Ponyville from up here. Off in the distance, she could see the purple roof of her sister’s store, the Carousel Boutique, and over there was the school, and there was Sugarcube Corner! She even thought that if she squinted real hard, she could make out the sign for Sweet Apple Acres! But that was enough sight seeing for now, Sweetie Belle had a job to do. She was supposed to be getting her Cutie Mark!

Having a special talent in window washing didn’t sound all that exciting to Sweetie Belle, but at this point, she’d take what she could get. Scootaloo was right; they were the only two blank flanks in town. This was her chance to rectify that situation, and she would not let it go! Even if her special talent was wiping windows hundreds of feet in the air...

The platform jerked and Sweetie felt herself drop a couple feet before her fall was suddenly cut short. She screamed and once more found her forelegs wrapped around the wooden planks of the platform. The scenery that had seemed so beautiful to her just moments ago was now dark and sinister. The ground beckoned softly to her, like that strange stallion that Rarity wouldn’t let Sweetie Belle talk to anymore after he gave her that candy bar.

“Sorry!” A muffled cry came from above. “You’re heavier than I thought!”

“Pull me back up!” Sweetie Belle shrieked back. Forget the view, forget the adrenaline, forget her cutie mark! She just wanted to live to see tomorrow! “I don’t wanna do this anymore!”

Above her, Sweetie saw Scootaloo peer down from the roof, an assortment of ropes gripped in her mouth. “Aw, c’mon fraidy-filly!” she protested. “The hard part’s over! Now you just halfta get washin’!”

“No!” Sweetie cried back, her forelegs still firmly gripped around the plank- or, at least, as firm as her quaking body would allow her to. “Just pull me up!”

With a loud groan of exasperation, Scootaloo disappeared behind the ledge of the building. A few moments later, the platform jerked violently. Sweetie Belle shrieked and hugged the boards even tighter, “Stop!”

“Argh! What now?”

“Don’t move me!”

“What? I thought you wanted me to pull you back up!”

“Just don’t!” Sweetie bell hollered, the last thing she wanted was for the platform to move again. “Go get help!”

Scootaloo sighed as she peered over the ledge once more. She opened her mouth wide to shout down to her friend. “How’m I gonna do that when I’m holding the rope that’s keeping you-”

“AAAHHHHH!!!”

“AAAHHHHH!!!”

Sweetie Belle was now officially panicking. The platform was in full free-fall, speeding to the ground faster than her brain could process the images of the world flying passed her. Scootaloo trailed behind her, pulled along by the ropes like a puppy on a leash, both of them were screaming at the top of their lungs.

“Scoots!” Sweetie Belle screamed. “You gotta fly!” The only answer she received was in the form of a fearful howl.

There was a loud crunching noise, followed by the sound of wooden planks snapping like twigs as Sweetie and the platform hit the ground. Momentum carried her forward and she rolled over a patch of slimy red and white goop and into a deep mud puddle. Scootaloo landed next to her with a loud splash!

The two fillies looked up, dazed. The world seemed to have liked spinning around Sweetie Belle, because it was still going full tilt. As the dizziness faded and the realization that she was still alive hit her, she threw herself back into the mud with a weary huff. At least that’s over! she thought.

“Uh-oh...” The sound of Scootaloo’s voice encouraged Sweetie to sit back up and examine her surroundings. Her friend sat next to her, completely covered in sticky, brown mud, but it was what she was staring at that scared Sweetie the most. The platform was completely destroyed, as was the apple cart it had landed on. Just down the road, two indignant earth ponies shook their hooves furiously at the them. One was a full grown orange mare with a blonde mane and a cowpony hat. The other was a filly like them, she was yellow with a red mane that had a large bow tied up it.

“I think it’s time to go!” Scootaloo said hurriedly, standing up and shaking some of the looser bits of mud off her coat. She pulled at the ropes that were still wrapped around her body, simply slipping them off instead of untying them.

“Yeah,” Sweetie Belle agreed, running down the street with her friend. “Rarity would be fur-fur, um... really mad if she found out we broke somepony’s apple cart!”

“Again...” Scootaloo added a bit ashamedly.

Once they were sure that the two earth ponies from town square weren’t chasing them, the duo slowed to a steady trot through the streets. They observed the ponies that walked around town, from Lyra and Bon-Bon sitting at the park bench, to that weird pegasus pony that always led a long trail of ducks through town at noon every day.

“Hey, Sweetie Belle!” Scootaloo said excitedly. “My mom gave me some Bits for lunch, wanna go to Sugarcube Corner?”

Sweetie Belle looked over to her friend, who was caked entirely in mud. Scootaloo was a pegasus pony, right? So why hadn’t she just flown up into the sky and stopped them from falling? Rarity was going to give her the lecture of a lifetime when she got home covered in mud, and Sweetie certainly wasn’t looking forward to that! Sweetie sniffed at her friend’s suggestion and looked away grumpily.

“What?”

“You lied to me!” Sweetie Belle grumbled.

Scootaloo’s face contorted into a mixture of confusion and frustration. “Huh?” she said. “When?”

“On the roof!” Sweetie exclaimed. Was her friend really that dense? How could she have forgotten already? “You said you’d catch me!”

“With the rope that pulled me off the building?”

Seriously? Sweetie thought angrily. I’m going to get grounded for life because she doesn’t know how to think on her hooves? “You have wings!” she cried. “You could have at least lowered us down safely!”