Recycled

by Trick Question

Rating: teen
Tags: Princess Celestia, Death, Twilight Sparkle, Sad, Main 6, Princess Luna, Drama, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, Dark, Spike
Length: 4244

Take a walk backwards through time to see Twilight's unconventional solution to dealing with her friends' mortality.

Rarity is dying from a rare medical condition. Twilight's other friends are getting older. Princesses Celestia and Luna will no longer speak to her. Yet, the Princess of Friendship refuses to make new friends.

Twilight Sparkle has an unconventional solution for dealing with loss. Come take a walk backwards through time, and see the truth through Twilight's eyes.

This story was rated Most Controversial in the finalist round of The Writeoff Association's "Out of Time" contest.

Published 2015-11-19 15:30:02 UTC
Last updated 2015-11-19 15:30:02 UTC

1043 Anno Solequus

"It was nice of Pumpkin Cake to close Sugarcube Corner early for us," said Fluttershy.

"Pumpkin didn't really mind," said Pinkie Pie. "She figured we could use a little peace and quiet, even though this is still technically a party!" Pinkie smiled a wide but unconvincing grin.

Rarity coughed, and Spike adjusted how she sat in his lap. The dragon carefully propped her head back against his shoulder until her breathing became regular.

"Thank you for everything, Pinkie," Rarity drawled out of the good side of her muzzle. "Honestly, it's just nice to get out of that dreadful hospital for a few hours."

Twilight Sparkle looked down at the table and frowned. Even with a young dragon in the room, Twilight stood out like a wet cat. She sat at nearly twice the height of her six friends, and the shadow of her glum mood was even larger.

"Twi, c'mon now, cheer up," Applejack said brusquely with a poke to Twilight's ribs.

Spike nodded in agreement, carefully cradling his wife in his arms. "Rarity wouldn't have seen forty without all the research you've done, Sis. We're grateful for the life we've been able to share together," he said, and gently kissed Rarity on her cheek.

"Sixty-six years is a long run," Rarity added, taking a wheezing gasp between a few of the words. "And I wouldn't change one bit of it, Twilight. I'm happy for all the moments we've spent together, and I wouldn't trade them for all of Equestria."

"I feel the same way. I'd do it all again in a heartbeat," said Twilight, her voice very soft. Her magical mane gently bobbed and flowed in the air behind her, tiny streaks of light rippling through it like shooting stars. The energy of her aura contrasted sharply with the bland, empty tone of her voice. Twilight sighed dejectedly.

Rainbow Dash reached a leg around Twilight. "Hay, sourpuss, listen up. I don't like to admit it either, but we're all getting old, okay? Normal ponies like the rest of us aren't built to last forever," she said. "You've got a long, awesome road ahead of you, Twi, and we all want you to enjoy it. But it's gotta be okay if we're not all around someday."

Applejack snorted. "I can't stand this hemmin' an' hawin'. Look, Twilight, we didn't plan this meeting for Rarity, okay? We planned it for you," she revealed. "Yeah, Rarity's probably gonna die pretty soon, and that ain't happy. But she's had a great life 'cause of all the work you've done, and at some point you gotta be okay with the cards you been hoofed. It don't get no better'n this."

Fluttershy nodded. "Losing a close friend is only sad because it reminds you of how wonderful it was to be with them. Our time with Rarity will always be special, Twilight. She wants us to be happy when she's gone. She wants you to be happy."

Spike winced and tucked his head up against Rarity's neck, but Rarity kept her eyes fixed on Twilight. "Fluttershy is right, as usual," said Rarity.

"You keep spendin' all your time with us old nags when you should be tryin' to make a new friend here and there," continued Applejack. "The rest of us got other friends and family, even Spike. We're a special bunch, sure, but there's more to life than just the seven of us."

Twilight bristled and looked away. "It's hard to make new friends when you're a princess, AJ. Ponies are afraid to approach you, and you never know if they're being sincere when they do. They don't warn you about that in the brochure," she said, the line so dry and deadpan its sarcasm had to be inferred.

"There's a brochure?!" gasped Pinkie Pie. Fluttershy shushed Pinkie, but Rainbow Dash laughed anyway.

"Twilight, darling. I know you'll be fine," slurred Rarity, with the best half-smile her face could muster. "You're the Princess of Friendship, after all. You'll make fabulous new friends, and learn to love and enjoy life all over again, just like the other..."

Rarity abruptly stopped talking, and everypony froze. The silence was deafening.

Twilight sighed again, breaking the lull. "It's okay, everypony. I'm actually glad you brought it up. I want you all to know that I'm going to speak with the Sisters again soon," she said.

A collective exhale of relief exited multiple muzzles.

"Hot dang. It's about time," said Applejack, finally relaxing into her seat. "If you start talkin' to the Sisters again, that's a huge load off our minds, Twilight. Those two will stick around long after we're pushin' up daisies."

"Best news we've heard in years," said Spike. "I'm proud of you, Sis."

"It's a perfect start," added Rarity. "Good show."

"It really is wonderful, Twilight," said Fluttershy. "I know you'll be able to patch things up, no matter what the silly disagreement might have been."

"Pfft. It's not like we don't already know. They're just jealous," said Rainbow Dash. "Right, Twilight? That was what this whole stupid thing was, wasn't it?"

Pinkie Pie grimaced. "Guys? Let's not go there unless Twily really wants to..."

Twilight shook her head. "No, it's fine. I'm still not ready to talk about it, but I thought it might make everypony feel better to know," she said, then paused for a moment. "Also, there's something else. I have an important request for each of you. I brought these." Twilight's horn glowed and a tiny hole opened up in the fabric of spacetime, right over the table. Seven small pills clattered onto its surface.

"Ooh, candy!" said Pinkie Pie. Applejack immediately blocked her with a hoof.

"Not candy, Pinkie," said Twilight. "They're sleeping pills. I want everypony to go to bed at ten o'clock tonight and take one of them. That way all my friends will be asleep at the same time."

"Sis, Rarity can't take medicine like this," said Spike. "It needs to go through her doctor."

"Then I need you to smuggle it into Ponyville General and make sure she takes it. It's a mild sedative, and it won't hurt her or affect her other medications. I already checked," said Twilight.

"And there's seven because you're taking one too?" asked Pinkie Pie.

"No. The extra one is for Spike, because he'll need twice the dose to put him to sleep," said Twilight.

Several nervous looks were exchanged, but Rainbow Dash was the first to say something.

"Um, Twilight... This isn't some kind of ritual suicide thing, is it?" asked Dash. "Because I don't know if I'm totally cool with that."

"Rainbow Danger Dash!" gasped Fluttershy. "How could you even think such a thing?"

Applejack paused for a moment in thought. "Well, is it?" she asked.

Twilight shook her head. "Of course not. Each pill contains 300 milligrams of trazodone, which is a common hypnotic—that means it's a sleep aid. You can tell by the stamping on them. Take one to a pharmacy if you don't believe me."

"I'll take the pill," slurred Rarity.

"Wait. I don't know if this is a good idea," said Spike. "Can you at least tell us why, Sis?"

"I'm going to cast a strange spell tonight that has some unpredictable effects. I might disappear for a long time, or something else might happen," said Twilight. "I don't really know for certain. I can promise that nopony will be harmed, and probably you'll just wake up in the morning and everything will be normal. But it would ease my mind a lot if everypony is asleep at the same time tonight. Just in case."

"Disappear? But for how long?" asked Fluttershy. "I'm sure we'd all feel much better if we all knew what was going on."

Twilight closed her eyes. "I'm sorry everypony. It could be a very long time. But this is something I need to do, and I can't provide any more details right now. I know I don't have any right to ask this of you, but in case I do have to disappear, I need you to be strong for me." She opened her eyes and looked up to her friends. Twilight's face was blank, but her eyes were wet.

"Eh, that's good enough for me," said Rainbow Dash, and slid her pill over to her side of the table.

"Me too," said Fluttershy, grabbing her pill.

"I trust you, Twi," said Applejack. "I know you'd never hurt us. I wish you'd open up more, though."

"Sounds like a blast!" said Pinkie Pie, bubbling over with excitement. "But I really hope you can come back soon."

Spike pulled three of the pills over to his side of the table. "I wouldn't do this for anypony else, you know," he said. "Now if we go through with this, I expect you to meet with the Sisters like you said. You know how much reunification would mean to Rarity and the rest of us."

"I'll see them within a month of my trip," promised Twilight.

1036 Anno Solequus (Seven Years Earlier)

Three alicorns beat their wings in rhythm, horns aglow as each performed a silly-looking hoofstand. The barren landscape surrounding them was covered in three magic auras.

"Fancy meeting you here, Twilight Sparkle," said Princess Celestia. Beads of sweat rolled up her face.

Twilight Sparkle said nothing and continued to beat her wings downward, shoving the ground with all her might.

"I believe the years may have robbed our poor, dear friend of her ability to speak," grunted Princess Luna. "Tis a pity, for I had always so loved hearing her sweet and charming voice."

For a couple of minutes, the only sound came from heavy breathing, wings, and telekinesis.

"I'm sorry. I still can't tell you," Twilight finally said. "But you're welcome for saving Canterlot."

"We have not saved it yet," argued Princess Luna. "Put some backbone into it, Princess Twilight Sparkle! Oh goodness, that is right: you have none. Sincerest apologies for my failure to recall your disability of virtue."

Twilight rolled her eyes and shoved even harder.

"We are very grateful, of course," said Celestia. "But guilt trips don't work on ponies our age, Twilight. My ruling stands, as I must presume you have already foreseen."

Princess Luna looked upwards toward her rear hooves. Canterlot Mountain was beginning to recede. "We are safe, my sister," said Luna, landing her body on the lunar soil. "It appears that gravity has finally repolarized."

Celestia set herself down and released her magical control over the landscape. Luna continued to hold her telekinetic grip on the dusty surface, now easily moving the Moon upon which the three ponies rested. The land in the distance above them drifted away.

Twilight was too exhausted to fly. She flopped down onto the Moon next to Celestia and Luna, saying nothing as she struggled to regain her breath.

"Another disaster averted, thanks in no small part to my former faithful student. I suppose visions of this crisis came to you in a dream, as well?" asked Celestia.

Twilight heaved for breath before speaking. "Yes, something like that. Don't worry, though. I'll be out of your manes as soon as I catch my breath."

"We do not want you out of our manes, foalish horse! All that we wish for is your honesty!" bleated Luna, wearing a sweaty frown. "We know full well your dreams have nothing to do with the mysterious precognitive ability you possess."

"Luna, relax. Someday, Twilight will open up to us again. And when she does, any and all transgressions will be in the past, and that day will be a cause for celebration across three kingdoms," said Celestia, gesturing upwards at the shrinking landscape above her. "Speaking of which, I hear Rarity's symptoms have yet to appear, thank the Heavens. You must realize our doctors could collaborate with your remarkable research program more easily if we weren't at odds like this. We want to help you, Twilight. We want to be your friends again."

"I want that too, but it's not going to happen. I wish you would reconsider but I already know you won't," said Twilight. She stood up and tentatively flexed her legs. "I can't blame you, for what it's worth. I'd probably do the same in your position."

"Living for hundreds of years provides one with a great deal of patience," said Celestia, her words ironically hasty as they raced Twilight's imminent egress. "Forever is a very long time to hold a secret, Twilight. All things must turn in time, and whatever the reason for your reticence, all would be forgiven if only you would give us the chance."

"Some things aren't so easy to forgive," said Twilight. "But you're right about one thing: forever is a very long time." She then spread her wings and took off unceremoniously into the open air between worlds.

1011 Anno Solequus

"Azo-what, exactly?" asked Rarity.

"Azoturic sclerosis," said the doctor. "It's a progressive disease that affects a pony's muscles and the nerve fibers that connect them. It's extremely rare. Very little is known about it, and it doesn't typically occur in ponies your age. We wouldn't even have performed the tests if the Princess hadn't insisted."

Rarity pursed her lips for a moment. "Wait, now I remember... That's the name of the wasting disease you identified, isn't it Twilight?" she said, turning to Twilight Sparkle.

Twilight nodded. "Yes. The treatment I developed should keep the symptoms from affecting you for at least twenty years," she said. "Probably much longer, actually. Hopefully I'll find a cure before then. If not, you'll be in for a rapid decline at some point."

"Well... with all due respect, Princess," said the doctor, "we can't really promise Ms. Rarity results of that sort. The treatments you've discovered do seem to work well, but they're still experimental. We've only been using them for six years, so we have no way of predicting what her condition will look like when she's forty, much less fifty."

"Twilight doesn't make promises she can't keep," said Rarity, solemnly. "That's why you decided to research this disease, isn't it? Another prophetic vision from your change?"

"I knew it was going to happen to you, yes. That's why I started work on it immediately after my transformation," she said, then turned to the doctor. "That bit of information is not to be shared with anypony, not even a husband or wife. Ever. Am I clear?"

"Yes, absolutely, my Princess," the doctor said nervously, then took a deep breath. "Well, then I suppose you're in luck, Ms. Rarity. According to Princess Twilight's research, treatment should wait until the onset of pre-symptomatic indicators which our tests suggest are still several months out. When treatment does begin, you will require monthly injections, some tissue transplants every few years, and a daily regimen of pills three times per day," the doctor said. "So there's quite a bit to it, I'm afraid."

Rarity laughed brightly. "Darling, that's no worse than the rigmarole I go through every morning to look this fabulous," she said, and winked at the doctor.

"I'll... go get the paperwork," the doctor said, blushing as he exited the room.

Rarity waited until the door had closed. "Alright dear, give it to me straight. How long do I really have?" she asked.

"I was serious. You've got at least twenty years, probably much more. In the meantime, I'll be doing more research," said Twilight. "I'll do my best to find a cure."

Rarity sighed and bit at her lower lip. "I'm so grateful for all you've done for me, Twilight. I really, truly am. But, something is nagging at me, and I must be blunt," she said. "Twenty years as a worst-case scenario isn't bad by any stretch, but it isn't exactly a lifetime, either. Is it selfish for me to keep dating him? I'm certain I love him, but I don't want to break his heart by dying young."

"He knows what he's in for, Rarity. He was already going to outlive you," said Twilight. "You don't have to feel guilty for having a shortened life expectancy. That's ridiculous. And even in the worst case, twenty years is still a long time."

Rarity nodded, and put on a brave face. "Then I'll tell him tonight. And Twilight?"

"Yes?"

"Cheer up, for Heavens' sake. You and I have a long time together too, Little Miss Maudlin Immortal," she scowled jokingly, then grinned.

Twilight smiled very wide. "Yeah, we do. And I wouldn't miss it for anything."

1002 Anno Solequus

"Announcing Her Royal Highness, Princess Twilight Sparkle," said the guard. Twilight stepped into the throne room and began a slow-paced walk to the thrones upon which two alicorn sisters sat.

The sound of the door shutting echoed throughout the chamber. No guards remained. Princess Luna tapped her hoof impatiently against her throne as Twilight slowly approached.

"Congratulations, Princess Twilight Sparkle," said Princess Celestia, with a smile. She stood up from her throne and walked down to meet her former student. Luna followed suit, but she wasn't smiling.

"Yes, congratulations, et cetera. I detest this 'small-talking', so let us get to the point," griped Luna. "Twilight, please explain. Why did you not inform us of this?"

"I've... been busy," said Twilight. Her shimmering mane billowed magically in the air as though a breeze were blowing, just like the alicorns facing her.

"Twilight, we're concerned. Is there something you're not telling us?" asked Celestia.

"Should there be?" asked Twilight.

Luna scoffed. "You stand before us now wearing your mantle, at twice the height when we last met nary a month prior, and dare play the foal! Why do you hide from us, Twilight Sparkle?" she said. "And how in the Moon above did you reach apotheosis so rapidly?"

Twilight cleared her throat before speaking. "My friends dug up the roots of The Golden Oak Library. They made magical ornaments from the time I spent there, and hung the lot in my throne room. It was a sweet gesture, and it touched me on a personal level. Then I went to bed," said Twilight, her voice strangely flat and dispassionate. "That night, I had dark dreams where I saw things that would happen in the future. Then I awoke to find I had transformed."

Celestia sighed and held a hoof to her temple. "Twilight, we're exceedingly happy for you, but this is unprecedented. It takes decades of personal growth for an alicorn to obtain her mantle," Celestia said. "If you've managed to do it in less than a year's time, you must be tapping into some kind of dangerous power source, even if you don't know what it is. But the fact that we had to learn of your apotheosis by way of rumor suggests you do know."

"No," said Twilight. "It only means I foresaw that this meeting would happen in my dream. I chose to delay speaking with you both because I already knew you wouldn't be satisfied with my explanation. This is not a conversation I've been looking forward to."

"I detected no unusual dreams on the night in question, and if your apotheosis happened in your dreams as you suggest, I most certainly would have noticed," said Luna. "The entire dreamscape would have lit up like the Sun! I do not believe your feeble story. Your prediction of dissatisfaction appears to have come true."

"If you've had a vision of this meeting already, then perhaps you already know we would like to run a few simple tests on you," said Celestia.

"Yes, I do," said Twilight.

"Very good. And you shall permit this, of course," said Luna.

"No," said Twilight. "I'm sorry."

A stern look crossed Celestia's delicate face. "Sorry does not begin to describe what I am feeling right now, Twilight Sparkle," she said. "What are we supposed to think of this? You're already the most talented mage in all of Equestria, you develop an overwhelming amount of power in a single night, and now you won't even let us examine you? For what reason? What are you hiding, Twilight? Please, do not place this wedge between us!"

Twilight sighed and closed her eyes. "This is the part where you tell me I'm banished from Equestria until I agree to let you examine me with magic. Then I refuse, and Ponyville and the surrounding areas officially become a separate country enclaved within Equestria."

Celestia bowed her head. "At least I don't have to say it. Yes, the ultimatum is exactly that. I hope with all my heart that you come to your senses soon. We both care for you, Twilight Sparkle. While our actions are solely in defense of Equestria, I value you as a friend, and I will dearly miss your presence."

"It will be many years before we speak again," predicted Twilight.

"But why, Twilight?" asked Luna, the expression on her face pained. "What are you hiding from us? Are you being blackmailed? Is some ancient evil upon you? We could help if only you would tell us! Do not flee from us like a cowardly foal!"

Twilight shrugged, turned around, and walked away.

Three Weeks Earlier

Princess Twilight Sparkle sat in her throne room, looking up at the magical memory trinkets that had been installed in the ceiling. The roots hadn't been cleaned well enough yet, so fresh clumps of dirt occasionally fell onto the Cutie Map. So many wonderful memories danced above her head. In the years to come, Twilight would look at them again and again, and each time they would remind her of the indelible past that she and her friends shared. It really was the perfect gift to make her castle into a home.

"What a charmed life I have... so perfect in every way," she whispered to herself. Twilight tried her best to smile, but it wouldn't come. The day her friends had surprised her with this beautiful gift had been the best day of her life, hooves down. How ironic that the same evening, this evening, could turn out to be so unspeakable. Twilight stood up and walked reluctantly out of the throne room. She had work to do.

Slowly, the alicorn glided down the long hallway to her bedroom. The magic of her transformation had changed many things about her, even the way she walked. Twilight Sparkle bore more than a passing resemblance to her former mentor, but appearances were superficial. Princess Celestia had grown comfortable living on a pedestal without any close friends other than her sister and advisers. Twilight was nothing like that. She had been without friends for most of her life, and now that her eyes had been opened she couldn't go back. She needed her friends. It was a primal need, rooted deeper than the need for grass or water or even air.

In the morning she would begin work on her medical research. She had carefully memorized all of the formulas she would need to keep Rarity healthy for at least fifteen years, and additional research would extend her life even further. Of course, Rarity and her other friends would still die someday; but the longer they lived, the longer it would be before she'd have to run the risk of abandoning them once again.

Oh, that terrible risk! It frustrated Twilight that she didn't know what happened when she broke the symmetry of time. There were two possibilities she considered plausible. In the less likely of the two, the future would be rewritten entirely, and her dearest friends would cease to exist. If that were the case, putting them to sleep might spare them from the experience, and perhaps even preserve a spark of their souls between timelines. But the more likely alternative was that Twilight would leave their universe for a new timeline, selfishly abandoning them forever. Of course she didn't like that idea, but her friends were stronger than she was. They could live without Twilight Sparkle, even if she couldn't live without them.

Twilight opened her bedroom door and stepped inside. She walked up to her bed and knelt beside it, looking down at the helpless little pony tucked beneath the covers, the pony she knew would be here tonight. There was a loud snoring sound, a sound Twilight hated because it felt so unfamiliar to her. It made the sleeping pony seem alien, and that in turn made the experience more memorable. Twilight didn't want to remember this moment. This is the last point in her life that she would ever want to revisit.

And yet, here she was again; because it was her life to live, and it was the life she needed. It simply wasn't enough for Twilight to be immortal. Her friends had to be immortal too, so she could live with them and share with them and love with them over and over again. Just like all those little ornaments in the throne room, her friends were precious to her beyond words. They were meant to be cherished and remembered and relived, forever. But immortality wasn't possible for normal ponies, so this was the only way to eternity. This was how it had to be, she thought to herself, steeling her conviction for the necessary task at hoof.

"I'm sorry," Twilight Sparkle whispered, brushing aside a tear as she once again cast the spell that stopped her beating heart.