A Humerus Tale

by Dontaskaboutit

Rating: teen
Tags: Princess Celestia, Slice of Life, Crossover, Dark, Main 6, Princess Luna, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, Comedy, Other, Random, Discord
Length: 3131

Sans ends up in Equestria.

[DON'T READ UNTIL YOU HAVE FINISHED UNDERTALE]

Sans, after being defeated by the human Frisk, gets sent to Equestria. Will he be accepted? Will he help our favorite pony's? Or will the memories he contains from the resets break him and cause him to distrust everyone?

"Or will I just be to lazy to give a bone?"

[Expect bad jokes, slight tear jerking, and a Sans who remembers all of the times he killed Frisk.]

Edited by Bryce98
"He's a pretty bryce guy! *snickers*"

MLP:FIM is owned by Hasbro
Undertale is owned by Toby Fox
Cover art belongs to AllSeeingOwl on deviantart

Published 2015-11-15 20:50:02 UTC
Last updated 2015-11-29 21:17:00 UTC

Prologue Edited

I feel the kid’s knife run across my chest, my eyes widening in surprise from both the sudden pain as well as the fact that I was caught off-guard. The ketchup I ate earlier spilling out on the floor. I see a smile on the kid’s face while I grab my chest, “..., … So I guess that’s it, huh?” I look down at my chest, away from the child bearing a knife and a dust covered blue and violet striped shirt. “Just… just… don’t say I didn’t warn you.” I stand up, ketchup leaking from my mouth while it continues to pour from my chest. “Welp,” I shrug, “I’m going to Grillby’s.” I limp away while the kid just watches me, after a minute the kid just walks away. I go over to one of the white pillars, stained gold by the light of the setting sun. I lean back on the pillar and start to slump down it slowly, until I hit the floor. “Papyrus, do you want anything?” I say out loud. Everything is starting to get dark, “So… I guess the kid isn’t going to use his time power this time. Heh.” Dark, darker, yet darker. It’s getting hard to keep my eyes open. “Even though I knew I would eventually lose… I thought I could win… avenge you… but in the end,” I close my eyes, “I couldn’t…”

“beat the unknown.” everything is going numb, until…

I’m waiting at the castle entrance to greet Twilight and her friends. It’s been a week since Tirek had attacked Equestria and has been resealed in Tartarus. It turns out the Tartarus gates were broken and must be rebuilt. We are still not sure how or why they were broken, but we do know that it was someone other that Tirek. It had to have been someone else, because not only were the gates shattered, which would take a substantial amount of power, which Tirek did not have at the time, but Cerberus was found injured not too far from the gates. That’s why we are having this meeting here at the castle. Luna and I are planning on sending the elements to see if they could assist with re-enchanting the gates and tracking down one one who broke them. We might actually have them moved closer to ponyville so they can be guarded by the elements. The gates are just a portal, after all.

My sister or Cadence would go by themselves, but they are still recovering from our reserves being drained by Twilight from her battle with the centaur. I’ve only just recovered two days ago myself, and I can’t go since I must watch over the repairs to the castle, along with managing all the other repairs around Equestria. I let out a stressed sigh. I can’t be everywhere, and this is something I need eyes personally on, especially if we decide to move it. I’m still surprised how my student, even after losing everything, still had the determination to beat that monster along with her friends. I’m so proud of them. Even after Discord’s betrayal…

I hear the castle doors open and I look towards them, I feel the cool morning air sweep in and see my sun just coming up over the horizon, it’s been a hour since I reset the spell that keeps it on its path. I then look slightly down and see my student and her friends come in through the entrance. Twilight ran up to me and gave me a hug, one I returned in kind as all of her other friends approached and bowed. Twilight releases the hug I look over at the other Elements, “What have I told you all about that? When we are alone like this you don’t have to be so formal.” I tell them with a slight frown.

Pinkie Pie springs up from the ground and giggles, “Sorry Princess, it’s force of habit!” she says with the usual Pinkie Pie energy behind every word.

“Yeah, what Pinkie said.” Rainbow Dash exclaims while hovering in the air.

The others also apologised as well. “You also don’t need to call me Princess either, just Celestia will do.” I give them a smile

Applejack tips her hat at my, That’s mighty kind of ya Prin- I mean Celestia, so what’ve ya called us up here fore?” asks the earth pony mare in her southpony accent.

I smile. I turn around and start walking, “Come to the throne room, I will tell you there. Please, I would like to hear what you all have been doing this week.”

We make our way to the throne room, and they all told me what they have been up to. They’ve been helping with the clean up in Ponyville, along with sending supplies to other settlements. Tirek did more damage than we had initially thought. He drained the magic from everything, even the plants and animals. He also destroyed many of the food storages on his raids with Discord, causing major food shortages at the moment. Even when he was imprisoned again and all the magic had returned, not all the crops had sprung back to life. Most of them are still recovering, and Ponyville was the only town to retain it’s food storage, so Applejack and Pinkie Pie have been trying to help out other towns nearby. Rainbow dash and Rarity have been helping with rebuilding and design. The collateral from Twilight and Tirek fighting, along with Twilight's library being blown up, caused major damages to both buildings… and Ponies. Fluttershy Has been helping the animals recover, while also helping others at the hospital heal from their injuries. Twilight, meanwhile, has been managing the entire operation in Ponyville. Twilight has also told me Spike has, and still is, exploring and documenting everything within their new home.

We make our way the the throne room doors, which have no guards posted outside.

Rarity seemed to take notice to this, “Excuse me Pri- I mean Celestia, but why are there no guards outside the throne room?” she asked with confusion.

“After Tirek's attack, many of the guards were found injured.” I respond, “All of the injured are being treated in the medical ward. The few unharmed guards have orders to help with the repairs to the castle and Canterlot. I’ve sent detachments around Equestria to assist the other towns as well, as you have probably noticed in Ponyville.”

Fluttershy spoke up, “Do- doesn't that leave you completely unguarded?”

I smile “Yes, but that doesn't leave me defenseless. I can protect myself you know.” I say with a hint of pride… or was that arrogance?

I open the throne room doors and we all look inside. It is an all white marble room with a red carpet leading up to the raised throne. The sun was just coming up so the room had a peaceful gold tint to it. There are banners holding both my cutie mark and my sisters, and one in the center that hold both the sun and the moon on it. there's also some creature under the left middle pillar with it’s front appendages in it’s blue coat’s pockets...wait, that’s not supposed to be there.

I hear gasps from the girls while I just rack my mind about where this thing came from and how it got in.

Twilight grabs my attention, but I don’t look away from the thing in the room, “Celestia, what is that!?” she asks with surprise in her voice.

“I don’t know, but we need to get a better look at it. You girls should stay behind me.”

We make our way over to the creature slowly, we are now a few feet away from it and we discovered it’s not a creature, it’s a skeleton. Judging by the length differences of it’s rear and fore limbs it’s bipedal. It is wearing a blue coat with fur lining the hood. Under the coat is a white shirt of some sort. It’s also wearing long black shorts and white sneakers, with socks underneath judging by the cloth coming up it's ankle. It’s face though is strange to me. Like its body, its face is quite big and rounded, but where the eye sockets should be (or at least were a ponies should be) there are two slits that look like tilted horse shoes. Its mouth was also puzzling since it looked like it was frowning even though it is a skeleton. It’s white under shirt has a rip in it, one that looks like a cut mark, and looking through it we can see a crack.

“Wh-what is this thing Celestia?” asks a frightened Fluttershy.

“I’m not sure Fluttershy, but whatever it is, I’m sad to say it’s de-”

“Ugh, my chest…”

I didn’t see it, but I know all our eyes widened in shock when we heard the skeleton talk and show expressions, even though it’s face is nothing but!

“I think I have a fracture… It hurts a ton.”

We watch it as it opened it’s eye sockets, and inside are black pupils and white irises. It’s looking down at its chest. I think it’s male, judging from it’s voice. It’s face then formed a smile, a painful looking smile, but a smile nonetheless.

“A skeleTON!” Heh! *cough*”

I was actually surprised, and slightly amused by the bad pun he just made. but behind me someone else apparently had more trouble holding in their amusement. I look back and see everyone staring at Pinkie Pie, who currently had both her hooves over her mouth, trying to hold back her laughter.

“Ummmm…”

I look back and see the skeleton looking at us with a look of shock that I must have been mirroring. We just kept staring at each other until he scratched his cheekbone.

“Hey there,” he took his right hand (It resembles a minotaur's hands) out of his pocket and held it out, his palm facing the throne “The name’s Sans. I would tell you a bone joke, but many people don’t find those humerus!”

Author's Note

Hello, so I was introduced to Undertale recently, and my favorite character is Sans, so I thought why not throw him into magic horse land and see what happens!

Rattled bones pt1

Author's Note

Hello everyone this is a bit of a small chapter here, it's more of a set up chapter if anything. Next chapter will be longer that this one, and it will be a bit dark.

Shout out to my editor Bryce98 for getting this done so quick.

Rattled bones pt1

So here I am with my hand out, watching as these horses… no they’re too small to be horses… these ponies to stop their giggling and groaning. The pink with the pink poofy man one was on the ground rolling around a laughing its little butt off. The orange one with the blonde mane had its stenson pulled over her face, but judging by the way it’s body was moving, it was also laughing at my great pun. The yellow one with the long light pink mane, even after my joke, looked wary of me, hiding behind the purple one that had it’s face glued to it’s hoof while groaning loudly. The white one with the purple mane just rolled it’s eyes and flipped it’s mane. The rainbow parade just gave me a deadpanned look.

The white one with the different colored mane though… it had the biggest smile on and was snickering in it’s hoof. After a little while it put its hoof down and made it’s way over to me with a much softer smile. It gripped my hand with its hoof (somehow) and shook it. “It’s nice to meet you Sans, I am Princess Celestia, the co-ruler of Equestria. Would you mind explaining what you are and how you got here? You gave us quite the surprise when we saw you.” she let go of my hand and backed up slightly.

“It’s nice to meet ya Princess. As for what I am,” I pull up my sleeve, showing the bones underneath, I smile and wink at her, “I’m a skeleton.” I put my sleeve back down and put my right hand in my pocket while rubbing my chest with my left. “As for how I got here...well I’m not sure on that one… actually I should be dead…” I cough and lean my head back with a frown. “Actually, *cough*, I still think I’m dying.” I rub my index finger along the fracture and I feel it cracking more. I smile and laugh, “Everything’s getting dark again…”

I feel someone run up to me and tried to keep me conscience, then Celestia yelled, “Twilight go get the medical staff and send them to my room! Fluttershy come with me I’m going to telepo-” and it all went black.

I’m waking up… I think? How am I still alive? I slowly open my eyes, pleasantly finding it dark, but bright enough see. Right now I’m laying in a pretty nice bed, looks king sized. The sheets feel like silk, and the cover is a quilt by the look of it. Has the same symbol as the one on Celesti- ugh that’s too long to say, even in my head. I’ll just call her “Tia”. Anyway, the same symbol as the one on Tia’s butt, or is it a flank when on an equine? Going to have to ask that later. I look at the rest of the room and find it all calm and soothing colors like soft pinks, gentle blues and creams, and some milk white here and there. The room wasn’t huge, but not as small as mine. But one thing it is though is messy. I mean, it looks like some tried to clean up in here, but papers are still scattered about, used towels are in a corner of the room, carelessly tossed in a hamper (some were on the floor by it.). The dresser in the room was most likely the only organized area. Different products and brushes organized and placed neatly in rows. I try to get up but the burning pain in my chest told me I was not allowed. I take a look down a find gauze wrapped around my breast bone and a few ribs. It looks like it’s wrapped up tight.

I hear a sound at the oak door of the room and redirect my gaze to it. It opens up with Tia and a brown horned pony with a white lab coat and one of those hearing do dads (never bothered to learn the name) around his neck. “Hey there, Princess, sorry if my voice is a little horse, I’ve just been through a painful ride lately.” I say while smiling at my pun, making both Tia and the doctor pony rush to me.

The doctor pony checks my vitals (good luck finding them) and Tia asked, “Sans, are you alright? How are you feeling?”

“Like my sternum’s cracked with a few broken ribs, oh wait…” I joke. She didn’t find it funny however.

“You almost died! This isn’t time for joking! You are a completely new species that I have never seen before who just appeared out of nowhere, now ARE. YOU. FEELING. OKAY?” she gives me a stern look like a mother lecturing her child. Reminds me of someone…

I lift my hand and put the tip of my index finger between her eyes and push her back slightly, “I’m fine Celly, I feel a lot better now. Do you have healing magic here? It sure feels like it.”

She gave me a slightly shocked look, “Yes, and what did you just call me?”

I put my hand back down and give her a questioning grin, “What, have a problem with nicknames, or are you just that ponypous about everything?” I had to hold in my laughter as to not hurt myself some more.

She sighed but smiled at my joke, “No, I’m just not used to somepony being so informal with me after we just met… it is quite pleasant, actually. So, Doctor Times, how is he doing?”

I redirect my attention to the brown pony next to me (his name is odd), “Well Princess he is doing well, another day with those enchanted bandages and he should be fully healed… well for being dead, but not… he is a strange one.” he gave a big smile, and I just noticed his right side of his head is slightly misshapen, and the same sides eye seems to be permanently half closed. He also doesn't have a mane.

She nodded her head, “Thank you, Doctor Times, that is all. You may return to your tests now, just don’t hurt yourself again, okay? I’d rather not lose the kingdom's best medical doctor and scientist.” she chided.

He just laughed and walked away, but before he left the room, he glanced at me, and from the light glare of what I presume to be magic on his horn, which was white, his left eye looked like it had a white pupil.

No… I’m making connections where they don’t exist.

Celly grabbed my attention again, “So I have many questions for you, and so do my fellow princesses, but I would rather have you at full health before they start to question you since they don’t really know how to… well… hold back.” she rubbed the back of her head with a blush. “So for now it will only be me and you. We can have a pleasant conversation, and ask each other questions over tea. Also as the co-ruler of Equestria I grant you permission to live in the castle for as long as you like.” she said… no recited in a formal tone.

I scratch my head and awkwardly smile, “Alright, but only if you drop that formality right here and now, ok? It brot… bothers me a little.” … Papyrus… “Hey Celly, could we have our little get together later, I’m feeling a little tired, you will come to learn I’m a lazy bone.” I give a weak smile.

She gives me a concerned look but decides to leave it alone, “Alright Sans, I will be back later tonight so we can talk, just get some rest.” she walks over to the door and opens it what I presume to be magic like the Docs. But right before she closed it she answered my request, “Also I’ll try and be less formal, but it will be a while. Old habits die hard, hehe.” she giggled before closing the door completely.

I close my eyes as to get some sleep, “Papyrus…”