Just Another Not-so Regular Anon in Equestria Story

You are Anon. You woke up one morning in the magical land of- nonono... This is to generic. Let's think of something else... IDEA!!!

You are Anonymous the green human wearing nothing but a tux and you have a question mark on your face. Much better! You woke up one morning in Sunbutt castle, with glass all over your body after falling through a glass window in the castles dining hall, where a white unicorn-pegesus thingy (currently known as Sunbutt) was devouring some cake. It was chocolate cake. She offered you some, but you declined, since chocolate is Satan's little helper (never trust chocolate ever). And also because you're lactose intolerant.

After she cast a spell from the horn upon her head, you were healed of your cuts. And now you are about to be put to exile for dissing on chocolate cake. Good luck.

"ANONYMOUS THE HUMAN! YOU ARE PUT TO TREASON FOR DISSING CHOCOLATE CAKE! HOW DO YOU PLEA?!" Sunbutt asks you.

"I'm lactose intolerant." Is all you say. She then releases you and gives you vanilla lactose-free cake. It tastes like shit. But you don't tell her that or you may be almost killed again. You are later sent to a place called Ponyville so a princess unipegesusamajigger (currently known as Starbutt) can learn your human ways.

You ride by flying pegesus wagon (Cuz why the fuck not?) to the town where Starbutt can study you and observe you in your not-so natural habitat. On the way there, you fall asleep.

END OF CHAPTER ONE