C for Celestia, V for Vendetta Parody
V for Vendetta Parody
After Princess Celestia was overthrown by the powerful dictator god, Nightmare Moon, the ponies of Equestria all bow down to her power and those who do not suffer the grave consequences
The mare looked at herself in the mirror as the television played in the background, a old conflicted looking colt was addressing the citizens of Equestria.
“So, I read that the former city of Canterlot is so desperate for materials, they have allegedly sent the Lunar Republic, crates full of wheat and apples, a gesture, of goodwill,” he said.
The mare was fixing her makeup and dress cautiously, she had a very important date that night. The TV rambled on.
“You want to know what I think?” the colt said “well you’re listening to my show, so I assume you do. I think it’s high time we let the colonies know what we really think of them, I think it’s payback time for a little trip to the moon they gave to us a few thousand years ago. I say we go down to the docks and dump that offering of crap into the bay where it belongs! Who’s with me! Who’s bloody with me!!!” he yelled, automated clapping could be heard in the distance of the show.
He continued, “Did you like that idea? Hah, Canterlot, the vile outcast of our land. I mean, what else can you say? Here is a city that had everything! Absolutely everything! And twenty years later it’s what? Equestia’s biggest imbecile colony! And why? Godlessness, let me say that again, godlessness. It wasn’t the Celestial war they started, it wasn’t the pony pox plague they created, it was judgement. Nopony escapes their past! Nopony escapes judgement! You think she’s not up there? That Nightmare Moon isn’t watching over her land? How else can you explain it? She tested us, and we came through, we did what we had to do, Celestia has fallen. Ponyville, Hoovesdale, I saw it all. Earth ponies, Pegasi, Dragons, disease ridden foul creatures. They had to go! Strenght through unity! Unity through faith! I’m a Nightmare god fearing unicorn and I’m damn well proud of it!”
“That’s quite enough of that, thank you very much” the mare said, turning off the TV. She was ready to go. As she left her small flat, she walked quickly knowing it was wall past the curfew set by Nightmare Moon.
“A yellow code curfew is now in session” the speakers around her blared, “any unauthorized ponies will be subject to arrest! This is for your protection” it repeated.
As she continued down the path she noticed she was being followed. She trotted faster, turning around tight corners into dark and seemingly deserted alleys. She made a sharp left and ran into a large blue colt.
“Excuse me miss” he said, blocking her path as she tried to pass. “In quite a hurry are we?” he said “It’s past curfew you know.”
The mare pushed him away from her, “My uncle is very sick!” she lied, wanting to leave as fast as possible.
“Oh sick uncle, right, what do you think of that Willy?” the colt said, as another green colt emerged from the shadows.
“Load of bullocks” he said smiling.
The mare coward in fear “I made a mistake, I shouldn’t be out after curfew I know that!” she said.
The colts grabbed her “Well maybe you can take care of me and my friend here, he’s real sick, aren’t you Willy?”
“Oh real sick, got a case of the blues, you can feel em” he said, grabbing the mare from behind.
“Let go of me” she yelled, she took out a can of pepper spray and pointed it at them.
“You just threatened an authority” the blue colt said smiling.
The mare looked frantic, “Oh god, you work for Nightmare Moon!”
Willy grabbed her again, “This means we get to exercise our own judicial privileges...and you get to swallow it.”
The mare tuned, “I’m sorry!” she repeated crying.
“Oh not yet, but you will be”, more colts emerged around her as they laughed and grabbed at her, as she screaming for help.
But, as all hope for the mare was lost, a silky white masked figure came around the corner.
“The multiplying acts of villainy do swarm upon you” The figure said, with a quaint and lady-like voice.
The figure raised its head to reveal a long and shining horn, it glowed brightly and shot beams of light at the colts, knocking them away from the young mare in distress. She bucked and slashed at them, flinging them around easily. Without breaking a sweat she rendered them all unconscious.
The alicorn smiled as she walked towards the mare, “I can assure you, I mean you no harm.
“Wh- Who are you?” she said.
“Who is but a function of what, and what I am, is a mare in a mask” she said, “But permit to me to announce the character of this auspicious persona.”
“Alright,” the mare said.
Cheers! In conceiving, a cheery, chivalrous citizen, cast carefully as both creator and caretaker by the council of Fate. This charade, no mere chat of cacotopia, is a component of the chanced classic, now corrupted, canceled. However, this caecity compromise of a by-gone concoction, stands chillingly and has changed to congratulate these calm and conceited clans, completing cities and the caitiff, the cold collected and cursed calamity of cadence. (She carved a "C" into a sign with her horn) The only conclusion is cleansing; a cleaning, held as a chance, not in calcine, for the cute and calumet of such shall one day claim the court and the caple. (she giggles) Compared, this cakewalk of caniflex caterers most cataphysical, so let me simply add that it is my very good honor to meet you and you may call me C.
The mare blinked at the white alicorn, confused, “Are you an important pony?
I am quite sure they will say so.
