Lullaby

by mareinthemoon

Rating: teen
Tags: Alternate Universe, Sad, Original Character, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, Dark, Pinkie Pie, Tragedy
Length: 3533

Some childhood nightmares are best left buried where they belong

Hush now, quiet now, Its time to lay your sleepyhead..It's time to go to bed..

A broken home with muffled screams.
Fallen stars and shattered dreams.

EDIT:http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mT2pxC2mCAI&feature=youtu.be
the Lullaby from chap 2 for your listening pleasure.

If any other ponies make killer music/art or readings from this please post or message me so I may enjoy them as well ;D

Published 2012-06-11 16:24:01 UTC
Last updated 2012-06-17 03:42:29 UTC

Pinkamina or is it 'Pinkie' nowadays?

Come now silly filly rest your head,
there live no monsters under your bed.

The words granny pie coed to the frightened filly rolled off the tongue with well practiced precision. The small pink filly curling back under the covers as her grandmother left the room,closing the door behind her.

It started again, the gnawing sound just under her bed. The odd lapping noises and those of sharp teeth snapping solid bone echoed around her room. Nopony believed her, not her mother, her sisters, or granny. She had always been to afraid to tell her father, he always looked upon her with such discontent. It was more than obvious she did not fit into this family and her father knew it all too well.

Every month it was an endless cycle, the noises came then father would start drinking again. Inkie and Blinkie did well to hide in their closets whenever father was home, never take a chance, never get caught.
There were times when she was younger where he would arrive after being gone all day looking for work to no avail but using the last if their bits to become intoxicated.

He would often stagger up the path and into the dilapidated home, No longer being the bearer of bread he was now the one of dread. Mother often tried to console him but her cries fell on deaf ears, soon the pleas became violence. And that is when it all started to happen.

The nights of her family were no longer ended with pleasant Lullaby sung, just the sounds of an argument down stairs and the mother with new bruises come morning. As this went on she made a mistake, she was in the wrong place at the wrong time.

The pink filly was in the kitchen drinking a glass of water as the summer night air filled the room causing goosebumps to raise along her back as the wind whistled by. She knew proper conduct meant refraining from snacking during the dry season, proper meals were difficult to come by the ground was cold like stone during these hard times and looked as if the season was a perpetual dryness that robbed more than the trees of their fruit.

Alas the wind carried the delightful scent of the sweet red apples that now rested neatly upon the counter and her stomach growled in response as if calling to the delectable offering before her, the light pink tongue darting across her pale cracked lips in anticipation.

She had given most of her allotted meal to the younger Inky and beloved Blinkie. With the way their home seemed to collapse around them in more than one way, the very fabric of their family ripping at the seams, Pinkamina had somehow become the one source of stability for her endearing younger sisters.
In essence she was more of a mother than the one of flesh and blood could ever be now.

Pinkamina stared at the bowl, her hooves moving upon their own accord, no longer obeying her brain but a slave to the will of her empty belly as she shakily traversed the kitchen, her face scant inches away from the rim of the bowl. Her blue eyes shimmered in desire as she leaned forward ever so slightly, the straight main flowing from the nape of her neck like a curtain as she managed to snatch a small apple from the bowl.

Her teeth gave little time before going to work, a trail of amber liquid trailing down her delicate face as the fruits sweet and fresh flavors danced upon her tongue. Suddenly in the shadows her worst fears came to light, The vision of her father moving into view was enough to put all of her hairs on end.

The look in the stallions eyes was glazed over by the influence of inebriation and narrowed in utter disgust.
He staggered towards her but what he lacked in coordination he made up for in horrific and malevolent intent.
Perhaps it was this that frightened her more than any monster that lurked beneath her bed, at least that one could have a chance of being simply a figment of her imagination, unfortunately the one before her was proven to be real.

"What do you think you are doing in my house!?"His voice boomed like thunder causing her to cower in fear and awakening everyopony in the house, none however daring enough to venture downstairs for fear of becoming his new target.

There is an old saying usually said to deter bullying among children.
'Sticks and stones may break my bones but words may never hurt me.'
Alas it is to the contrary.
A blade may leave a wound but the scar will form as it heals but more than not...
It is words that are able to cut deeper than any weapon and leave a gaping wound of the heart and soul that will never heal.

The things that took place in the kitchen as the family heard but pretended it had never occurred would be forgiven as if what had transpired was alright and that her pain never mattered to begin with,that it was not worthy of attention nor acknowledgement.

She would be broken from within and never given chance to call out for help, no pony to confide in and only her gagged screams and cries from that night as her solemn lullaby in the dark.

Pinkamina knew she had to get away, she had to leave this place of nightmares behind her.
'Inky and Blinkie....' Her mind recalled her silent vow to protect them from this broken home that robbed the inhabitants of their fondest dreams and now the only thing she had worth anything that was meant to be reserved for ones special somepony.

Her dreams of being a spring bride one day in Canterlot were faded and gone like the ashes of the long forgotten on the wind, all she could hope for now was a life surrounded with joy that could drown out her despair.
The pink filly sat outside,peering into the water trough as the thoughts swirled in her head of her only way out.

She would feel pity for Inky and Blinkie but after all that had happened, after knowing what he had done. Could they blame her for the idea coming into mind?
It would be so easy, painful perhaps, but easy nonetheless...
All she needed to do was simply lean into her own reflection in the water and soon she would be one with sweet oblivion that promised the key to her freedom.

Giggle at the ghastly, snicker at sinister hee hee haa haaa HOO HOOO HO.

She looked frantically for the source of the ominous words, they rang out in an eerily merry voice that was laced with dark desire.It was enough to catch her attention, you could say the odd tone drew her in like a moth to the flame. Somewhere deep inside she felt as the moth does, she was drawn right into danger knowing she may never return.

Like how the moth flies to the fire, she wanted to be one with true beauty.

As if she had been possessed, her hooves moved steadily towards the source. The sound of her small hooves hitting the creaking wooden floorboards resonated as a gentle yet steady tapping noise as she ascended the stairs.

Poor little pony don't shed your tears, your pain never happens to those who hears.Its high time you conquered your fears.

She followed the voice as it called to her from her own room, her eyes glazing over as the melody began to to lull her.

Hush now, quiet now, Its time to lay your sleepyhead..It's time to go to bed..

Her body moved to the sound, making her way over to her bed. In the back of her mind she knew she was possibly never going to be seen or heard from again and she welcomed this.
She moved down to crawl under her bed, the light fading at glowing red eyes appearing before her as its fanged smile creepily swept underneath those eyes. She gazed upon this site as she fell out of its trans but the feelings within her remained the same. She was filled not with fear or terror, she only felt relief looking into that smile.

It was finally over...she could be free.

She closed her eyes preparing for the end.

After several moments of waiting, the finishing blow never came. Her sky blue eyes slowly opened to find the world around her was no longer that of the one under her bed. She was now in a world of deep black skies and red terrain.
Jagged mountains lined the horizon around her as a red moon hung above in the sky.

Pinkamina looked around for any sign of life, her eyes meeting those of several ponies with eyes of sunken black. There was a slim chance that she had somehow entered the fabled pony Hell but then again what had she done to deserve such a fate? If her questionable excuse of parental figures were not here there could be no chance of this being Hell.

'You are quite brave even as you approach your grave.'

She snorted in response to these words.
"It is not death anypony should fear nor the things that go bump in the night....Its living with real life monsters in a real living Hell."

'Pinkamina so brave and true, I do have a proposal for you. If you give me thine given name you shall receive a new life to claim.'
The words were tempting and all she had to do was throw away her name, the memories of darker days for a bright future.

What would you have done? Would you have refused?

Pinkie sighed looking out the window of her new home, every so often those memories of the past came to claim her thoughts from time to time. She would always just smile as she put them back into the dark corner of her mind.
She gave her name and a debt to be paid.
There are times when she felt it would come to collect when she was at her happiest.

As she was breaking from her thoughts Applebloom rushed upstairs to Pinkie with a smile of utter delight.
"Guess what Pinkie? There are new ponies in town!"
Pinkie put on her best smile, it was time to bring out the welcoming wagon, her favorite past time.

With a skip in her step and a song in her voice she ran downstairs to greet the newcomers. Her eyes rested to look down the main road onto the new ponies of which she would be fast friends with.
The curly mane deflated as the contraption fell from her shoulders. Her blue eyes widened in pure fear as the figures became more visible.

It was Inky and Blinkie.

They were the same as she had left them, they were young fillies without their cutie marks. Their eyes narrowed as they looked upon her.The black filling their eyes as twisted smiles crawled up their faces.
She took two steps back in fear before she found herself unable to move. Pinkine began to struggle and then paled out as the image of herself from those days appeared between them.

'You can't run from who you are Pinkamina..or is it 'Pinkie' Nowadays?'

She shook her head in horror, the sweat creeping down her face."G..Go away. This can't be happening..."

'You abandoned us....you abandoned yourself. Come, let us be one again......'

The specters surrounded her in a flash, their disturbing smiles and echoing laughter engulfing her.

Pinkie Pie remember who you are
all of us must bear a scar.
If we ignore and run too far
you shall fade like a dying star.

Pinkamina do not cry, you shall be born again
my eternal lullaby.

Somewhere in Equestria a pink pony falls to darkness
and at the same time another is born with the chance to try again, for her life to make amend.

The Laughing place

Time is not linear, the river does not flow only to halt at the end. No.
The current of the tide is steadily circulating around the obstacles of our days, around the strings that hold our realities we call fate.

Eternity is a circle
with no beginning and no end.

For those who find themselves before the eyes of the watcher, ye who lurks behind the wall and gently pulls the strings.
Within the flow of eternity, within the cycle.
Until the lesson is learned they become lost in the inner circle, doomed to repeat the past mistakes time and time again until they find the right path on their own.

SUBJECT NAME : PINKAMINA D. PIE
ATTEMPTS: 300,000

POSSIBILITY OF REDEMPTION: 0.2%

Into darkness you will go, one by one become a part of my show.

A stallion of ivory white watched carefully as the pink filly grew in poverty once again, her life feeling like scant seconds before his gaze.
She was bound to repeat the mistake again, she would abandon herself.

The natural order prevented him from leaving the dark of his own realm, from intervening.
If he had not made her try again and again she would grow to develop a split persona capable of darkness and eventually rampage with 'baked bads' of a rather insidious nature.

He had seen the possible future, the joy she could create in others and the fear she could inspire should he let her be.
When the moderator cares not for her subjects sometimes it is up to darkness to forge the light once again.

Pinkamina shuddered at the breakfast table, unable to look anypony in the eye. She had spent the rest of the night attempting to rid herself of the filth but no matter how much she tried she could rid herself of the stains on the outside but never of the one within.
Inkey and Blinkey looked at upon her, their eyes brimming with sorrow for their beloved elder sister.They knew something horrifying had happened to her but alas could not speak of it for fear of being next on his list.

Pinkamina would gladly rid the world of her parents before subjecting the filly's before her to the travesty that was their horrid lives. She wanted so badly to find employment so she and her sisters could escape this wretched place.
They had made a special promise silently to one another, no pony left one behind and one day soon they all would find their laughing place.

The small meal before her was some flowers and a piece of bread, her stomach growled silently in protest but the fear of a repeat of what had already transpired because of this hunger prevented her from eating. Carefully she timed it, awaiting when their mother and father would leave to great the stallion from the bank who more than not demanded bits that did not exist. They got up from the table and she jumped into action, dividing her food between Inky and Blinkey quickly. She knew that if she had spoken up with spare food on her plate that their father would not hesitate in devouring the contents and their mother would be the one to feed it to him to boot.

She silently urged them to eat a little faster, Pinkamina herself was thin as a rail but she refused to have her reasons for living suffer for a moment.
'Were going to get out of this place....I promise.'
She mouthed in silence to them this gentle prayer for a happy not too far off tomorrow.

He had expected her to do many crazy things in her life time but confronting him while he taunted her under the bed was rather unexpected.

He had begun to make the noises that would cause the madness, the warning he placed for her to know when her father would be drunk again. To his surprise the sheet surrounding the foot of her bed was lifted quickly followed by the small pink filly crawling under with a smile.

Every time before he had to lull her in but somehow...she defied her fate, she broke the odds..
the power of 0.2% proved incredible indeed.

She looked on bravely as she had done many times before but this time she feared death and was after a new type of bargain.
"Excuse me....mr monster....sir..."
Her voice softly spoke, unsure as to what she was supposed to say.
He looked down upon her, the glowing of red eyes appearing before Pinkamina followed by the fanged smile.
'Silly Filly you wish to forget? only to live a life of regret..'

To this she shook her head from side to side." No....I can't leave them here in this place....We made a promise. No pony gets left behind or forgotten." Her eyes swelled with tears as his smile widened. At last she had learned her lesson, or so it seemed.

" I want to know mr monster.....would you get rid of the real monsters for us? Im sure your very hungry." She smiled eagerly at him.

He was beyond delighted, perhaps she belonged in the dark after all. After all the road to hell is paved with good intentions.
She was now on his level, an act of horror can create boundless light.
Pinkie was quick, Pinkie was clever.

No, This time she would leave her home as Pinkamina and this time not alone.

Pinkamina was working the counter of sugar cube corner happily as always, Inky and Blinkey were quickly icing the last cupcakes beside her. Today was a special party for the three hostesses, they were going to be greeting royalty into Ponyville and open the new shop in Manehaten next week with all their friends.

The element of laughter had found her very own laughing place, and the once forgotten sisters finally allowed to blossom in the light of their joy.

The hushed cries of the broken home burned and died, and from the ashes the flowers of joy grew.

Pinkamina, you finally found the reasons why.
Hold your head up high and do not cry,
Smile in the blue of the purest sky.

Never forget who you are,
The terrible wound is now a scar.

The party of one is now three
forever a family, finally free.

The lullaby

Hush now, quiet now, Its time to lay your sleepyhead..It's time to go to bed..

Come little Ponies one and all
I shall catch you, should you fall.

Come little Ponies , don't you cry
even as I take your sky.

Come little Ponies, into my cave.
leading you closer to the grave.

Come little Ponies, now don't you squirm.
The ropes that hold you may leave a burn

Poor little pony , ye hath died
no place left to go but inside.

In the darkness we will go
one by one they'll be a part of my show.

Don't cry little pony we shall be together,
you now belong to me forever.

Words about Lullaby

This is the authors note to Lullaby.

I explore many dark themes in writing this one mainly deals in rather unpleasant experiences in pinkies life as a child.

However the last verse of the story refers to an interesting element that I may have not flushed out too well and I would like to explain it further here.

It refers to that Pinkamina's life is in a constant circle effect. her childhood is hellish and each time she is presented with the option of taking the deal or refusing it.
It hints that Pinkie (thus the different name) has always taken the deal and always will meet her end at the hooves of her forgotten family and abandoned identity until she gets it right.

Its supposed to be used as a type of punishment for trading ones identity for ones hearts desire even if it seems to be the only way out.

The ending if you notice is differently written than the beginning . the beginning is high detail while the end is very bare
this is intentional and meant to leave you with a feeling of the luster of pinkie has vanished and in the end even the words become bland and colorless.
I find for some parts less is more and its supposed to also make the story feel broken and incomplete.
I was going for that.
It makes the whole endless circle aspect more effective by the flow trickling at the end into nothing.

If my lack of detail came off as dare I say lazy, be aware it is intentional.

A later released counter story will be released depicting Pinkamina's life as if she had not taken this deal and had infact learned the importance of her own identity and the fact that we all have scars that we must bare.

I hope you enjoyed the fic for the darkness and understood the message I was hinting at.