DEATH BATTLE

by Darth Pestilence

Rating: teen
Tags: Comedy, Random, Crossover
Length: 11604

This is a parody of Death Battle that features: you guessed it, ponies! Join Wizard and Boomstick as they analyze your favorite characters to find out who would win a Death Battle.

This is a parody of Death Battle. Featuring: you guessed it, ponies! Join Wizard and Boomstick as they analyze your favorite characters to find out who would win a Death Battle.

Disclaimer: I own none of the characters featured in this story. Death Battle belongs to Screwattack! MLP belongs to Hasbro. Cover Image is not mine.

Link to Death Battle Rules HERE.

Published 1970-01-01 00:00:00 UTC
Last updated 2016-05-04 01:18:03 UTC

The power of Teamwork. (Analysis)

None of these characters belong to me. All properties belong to VALVE, Hasbro, and Screwattack!

"Teamwork, one of the most efficient ways to get things done," said Wiz.

"And these two groups have mastered the art of ass kicking through the power of teamwork," said Boomstick.

"The Mane Six: The protectors of Equestria."

"And the RED mercenaries: The famed mercs of TF2."

"Since the RED team has such a vast armory of weapons to choose from, we will be giving them the most iconic arsenals. And since the Mane Six have powerful magic abilities that could instantly end the fight, we will be restricting them to their natural abilities. This means no Elements of Harmony or Rainbow Power," explained Wiz.

"He's Wiz and I'm Boomstick!"

"And it's our job to analyze their weapons, armor, and skills to find out who would win a Death Battle."

"The RED Team is a group of mercenaries hired by Redmond Mann to combat his brother Blutarch. These crazed killers come from all across the globe, giving them a wide range of skills," said Wiz.

"And a crap-ton of firepower! Each of these hired killers bring their own style of combat to the battlefield, showing us so...many...guns!" said Boomstick, excited at hearing the guns he'd see in this episode.

Scout

+Fastest member of the team

+Can Double Jump

+Quick on his feet, good at dodging and running

-Lowest stamina on the team

-Hit and Run technique doesn't always get the job done

-Cocky attitude can get the better of him

"Born in the city of Boston as the youngest of 8 boys, Scout had to learn how to fend for himself at an early age," said Wiz.

"Inspired by the fights he had as a young boy, he began training his speed to make up for his lacking physique. And boy, this dude can run!" said Boomstick.

"Indeed. Scout easily outspeeds any of the other classes in the game, making him a valuable asset to the team," said Wiz.

Weapons:

Force-a-Nature.

+Fires more rapidly than the standard Scattergun

+Can cause knockback for whatever it hits

+Does more damage than the Scattergun

+Can be used for an effective third jump

-Only holds two shots, resulting in frequent reloads

BONK!: Atomic Punch

+Renders Scout invincible for eight seconds

-Takes time to cool down after consumption

-Cannot be used when it is impossible to taunt

Sandman

+Does the same amount of damage as the standard bat

+Can launch a baseball that can stun enemies

+Can be used to perform the Home Run taunt, which is an instant kill

-Baseball takes 15 seconds to reappear after launch

-Reduces Scout's health by 15 points

"For Scout's primary, we are giving him the Force-a-Nature; a gun that does more damage than the normal Scattergun, and can cause knockback. Though the clip size is smaller than the Scattergun, forcing him to reload a lot," said Boomstick.

"His BONK! Atomic Punch grants him invulnerability for eight seconds. And his Sandman can launch a baseball that can stun opponents, as well as perform the Home Run taunt, but it does come at the cost of 15 health, limiting his already weak stamina," said Wiz.

"But don't underestimate this quick Bostonian. He's taken down a BLU Heavy all by himself, has fought in a war against BLU alongside his team, and has helped his teammates fight Wizards, monsters, spirits, and robots!" said Boomstick.

"But he also isn't perfect. His stamina is lacking, requires using hit and run tactics, and has a cocky attitude that can lead to his downfall," Wiz said.

"And Rainbows make him cry!" added Boomstick.

"Grass grows, birds fly, sun shines, and brother; I hurt people."

Soldier

Age: Unknown

Height: Unknown

Weight: Unknown

Real Name: Jane Doe

+Can Rocket jump

+Rocket launchers provide good offense

+Has above average health

-Second slowest of the classes

-Is pretty dumb (and insane)

"Next up, we have the Soldier; an insane American who thinks all other countries are inferior," started Wiz.

"He loved America so much that he wanted to go fight in World War 2. But he was rejected, so he went on a German killing spree anyway...after the war was over," Boomstick said.

Weapons:

Rocket Launcher

+Shoots rockets at opponents

+Can be used to Rocket Jump

Shotgun

+Fast reload

-Low damage

Market Gardener

+Deals critical hits against enemies while the user is Rocket Jumping

-Will not randomly crit

"The Rocket Launcher blows enemies sky high, the shotgun is his secondary, and the Market Gardener deals critical hits while the user is rocket jumping. He can also use the grenades on his chest to perform a suicide taunt kill," Boomstick said.

"He has fought wizards, monsters, BLU, and robots with his team. But he definitely isn't perfect. His rocket launchers have small clips, he is one of the slowest classes, and he is downright insane," said Wiz.

"If fighting is sure to result in victory, then you must fight!"

Pyro

Height: Unknown

Weight: Unknown

Age: Unknown

Gender: Unknown

Race: Unknown

+Is insane (in a good way)

+Flamethrowers deal afterburn damage

-Has average speed and durability

"The Pyro is a mysterious pyromaniac of unknown origin," said Wiz.

"Not to mention this guy, girl, or whatever it is is downright crazy. It sees itself spreading rainbows and happiness when it is really causing death and destruction," said Boomstick.

Weapons:

Flamethrower

+Sets opponents on fire

+Airblast can deflect projectiles

-Short range weapon

-Airblast uses up ammo

Scorch Shot

+Bounces off enemies and detonates

+Does mini-crits against burning opponents

+Direct hits cause knockback

+Can be used to flare jump

+Can be used to perform the Execution taunt, which deals 400 damage

-Direct hits do 35% less damage than other flare guns

Axetinguisher

+Deals critical hits against burning players

-Does not randomly crit

-Deals half the damage of the standard axe against non-burning players

"Pyro has fought BLU, robots, wizards, supernatural beings, and even killed an unprepared BLU team single-handedly," said Wiz.

"Not to mention that his insanity comes in handy. But he still has weaknesses. He has average speed and durability, and must get in close to do any real damage," said Boomstick.

"Mmmphh. Hudda hudda."

Demoman

+Average durability

+Good strategic fighter

-Always Drunk

-Below Average speed

"Hailing from Scotland, meet the one eyed, black, Scottish explosion expert!" said Boomstick in an excited voice.

"Demoman is a master of all things that explode. Giving him a devastating close range advantage," said Wiz.

Weapons:

Grenade Launcher

+Grenades can bounce off walls

+Explode on contact with an enemy

Sticky Bomb Launcher

+Can be used to sticky jump

+Attaches itself to any hard surface

+Can be remotely detonated

-Up to eight can be out at a time

Eyelander

+Has long melee range

+Increases base speed and health upon decapitation

+Heals Demoman upon decapitation

+Can perform the Decapitation taunt, which is an instant kill

-Does not randomly crit

-Decreases user's health by 25

"Demoman will be wielding the basic grenade launcher and sticky bomb launcher for this battle. The Grenade launcher shoots grenades that can bounce off walls and roll along the ground, and the sticky bomb launcher shoots bombs that can be remotely detonated," said Wiz.

"And for his melee, he uses the Eyelander. A claymore that holds a spirit which thirsts for heads. When you decapitate some fool's head off, you get several boosts, such as health and speed," said Boomstick.

"He has fought many dangerous creatures and humans over the years, but he still has flaws. He's always drunk, he is not the fastest class, and he can also be harmed by his own bombs," Wiz reminded.

"KABOOM!"

Heavy

+Has the most health of any class

+Is the physically strongest of the team

-Slowest of the classes

-Biggest of the classes

"Next up is the Heavy. This large Russian behemoth is the most durable of the classes, allowing him to take wave after wave of punishment," said Wizard.

Weapons:

Natacha

+Bullets slow enemies on contact

+Gives Heavy a 25% damage resistance

-Does less damage than the default mini-gun

Sandvich

+Fully heals Heavy when he eats it

+Can be thrown, allowing for other players to pick it up

-Cannot be eaten in places where you can't taunt

-Takes 30 seconds to recharge

Fists

+Can perform the Showdown kill taunt

"Heavy's primary is Natacha, an absolutely BEEE-YOOTIFUL mini-gun that slows down enemies," Boomstick said, salivating at the giant death dealer.

"The Sandvich can fully restore his health, and he can also use his giant fists to pummel enemies. But although he has fought some pretty crazy stuff with his team, he still has weaknesses. While he can take a lot of punishment and deal it out as well, he is a close range class. He is also very slow, leaving him open to long range attacks," said Wiz.

"Some people think they can outsmart me. Maybe *sniff* maybe. I have yet to meet one who can outsmart bullet."

Engineer

-Below average stamina

-Average speed

+Skilled at offensive and defensive combat

-Buildings do most of the work for him

"Coming straight from Texas is the Engineer, the man who gave me my favorite philosophy: More Gun," said Boomstick, admiration for the Texan in his voice.

"Engineer is a great asset to his team. His buildings supply both offense and defense for his team," said Wiz.

Weapons:

Shotgun

+Fast Reload

-Low damage

Pistol

+Fast reload

-Low damage

Wrench

+Can be used as both a weapon, and a way to build and repair devices

Devices

+Sentry shoots enemies

+Dispenser supplies allies with health and ammo

+Teleporters teleport allies

"Engineer may not have the most powerful weapons, but his devices certainly make up for it," said Wiz.

"His shotgun and pistol can get off a few good shots, while the wrench can whack his enemies and upgrade his machines," said Boomstick.

"And while his devices are a great help to his team, Engi himself can't do much in combat. But don't underestimate this brilliant Texan," finished Wiz.

"The answer...is a gun. And if that don't work...use more gun."

Medic

+Second fastest class

+Vital in keeping teammates alive

-Average durability

-Built more for support than fighting

"And now we have the Medic, the psychopathic doctor from Germany," said Wiz.

"This guy is INSANE. He has no regard for human life, no compassion for the sick, and has a strange interest in experimenting on body parts. He also once got his medical license taken away after he removed a patient's skeleton. Kinda reminds me of my cousin..." said Boomstick.

Weapons:

Crusader's Crossbow

+Deals damage to enemies and heals allies

+Quick reload

-Healing does not affect uber

Medigun

+Heals allies

+Ubercharge makes Medic and whoever he is healing temporarily invincible

-Uber does not stop knockback

Ubersaw

+Can perform the Spinal Snap taunt

+Each hit fills up the ubercharge meter by 25%

-Hits result in 20% slower swinging speed

"Medic can heal allies with his medigun, heal and deal damage with the crusader's crossbow, and hold his own in a melee fight with the Ubersaw," said Wiz.

"But he is more of a support class, meaning he is not very capable in a fight," said Boomstick.

"Let's go practice medicine."

Sniper

+Above average speed

+Very effective at long range

-Not very effective at close range

-Below average durability

"And here we have the sharp shooting Australian himself: Sniper," said Boomstick.

"As his title implies, his specialty is picking off important targets from a distance," said Wiz.

Weapons:

Sniper Rifle

+Headshots are guaranteed critical hits

-Firing without the scope deals minor damage

-No random crits

Jarate

+Covers enemies for 10 seconds

+All damage is a mini-crit while covered

-Takes 20 seconds to recharge

Bushwacka

+Normal mini-crits are registered as crits

-Additional 20% damage vunerability while active

"He uses his great aim to pick off enemies from a distance," said Wiz.

"He uses a jar of urine to get mini-crits, and the Bushwacka as his melee. But while he is good at a distance, he is extremely vulnerable up close," said Boomstick with a snicker.

"Be polite, be efficient, have a plan to kill everyone you meet."

Spy

+Great at stealth

+Average speed

+Can see enemy's health

-Below average durability

"And for the final mercenary we have the Spy. Hailing from France, this merciless back stabber has been the source of player rage since launch day," said Boomstick.

Weapons:

Ambassador

+Has perfect accuracy with shots fired at slower intervals

+Can score headshots

-Fires slower and does 15% less damage than the standard revolver

-No random crits

Dead Ringer

+Leaves a fake body upon taking damage

+50% damage reduction while out

-Cloaks for seven seconds

-Makes loud noise when you uncloak

Knife

+Backstab is an instant kill

Cloak and Dagger

+Recharges cloak when stationary

-Drains the faster the player moves

"The Ambassador is a revolver that can get headshots, the dead ringer can be used to fool enemies, the knife is great for killing unaware foes, and since Spy's sappers are useless in this battle, we gave him another one of his cloaks: The Cloak and Dagger," Boomstick continued.

"Spy is a master of stealth but can't do much in an all out gunfight," Wiz finished.

"Right behind you."

"The country of Equestria has faced many threats, but the group known as the Mane 6 have been victorious over evil every time," said Wiz.

"For girly ponies, these multi-colored horses are actually frickin awesome! ...For the most part," said Boomstick.

Twilight Sparkle

+Leader of the group

+Became an alicorn

+Very intelligent and proficient with magic

-Can crack under pressure

-Does not have much experience in flight

-Does not have many physical advantages

-Tends to rely on friends too much

"Twilight Sparkle was the personal student of Princess Celestia until she was sent to Ponyville to learn the magic of friendship. While there she made friends, rediscovered the Elements of Harmony, and stopped Nightmare Moon from plunging the world into eternal night," Wiz started.

"After that, she went on several more adventures and eventually ascended to the legendary rank: Alicorn," said Boomstick.

Magic:

+Can conjure fire

+Bursts and beams of magic

+Teleportation

+Telekinesis

+Force fields

+Self transformation (such as when she turned her friends into breezies)

-Some spells take time and concentration to perform

-Too much magical output can drain her energy

Flight:

+Can fly better than the average Pegasus

+Wings give her the ability move clouds and manipulate weather

-Not very experienced

Intelligence:

+Smartest of the group

+Can solve puzzles and riddles with enough time

-Sometimes loses her cool when her plans don't work out

-Can be naïve at times

"In her new form, her magical potential increased tremendously, giving her a bigger advantage than her unicorn form granted her," said Wiz.

"You can say that again! She can fire bursts and beams of magic, teleport, create force fields, use transmutation, and move things with her mind! Not to mention that she can fly now, which gives her the ability to manipulate the weather," said Boomstick.

"Also, since she has spent practically her whole life inside a library she is incredibly intelligent, even so far as being able to finish an ancient spell that not even one of the most powerful unicorns in history could!" said Wiz.

"But even with all her power, she is still prone to magical overload and mental breakdowns," said Boomstick.

"You may have taken our magic, but we have something greater: Friendship!"

Applejack

+Physically strongest of the group

+Bearer of the Element of Honesty

-Most likely the least intelligent of the group

-Prefers to take fights and challenges head-on.

"Applejack was once a humble  farmpony until she became the Element of Honesty," started Wiz.

Strength:

+Can shake apple trees with a single buck

+Can launch hay bales several yards

Lasso:

+Is very skilled at handling it

+the rope itself is pretty durable

"Years of work on the farm has made her into the strongest and most durable of the group, able to shake trees with a single kick," said Wiz.

"And being a stereotypical country girl not only means she has a thick southern accent, but is also pretty good at using a lasso. She can perform tricks with it, as well as hogtie someone faster than they can say "Apple pie," said Boomstick.

"Despite being quite durable and strong, Applejack is limited to those abilities due to being an Earth Pony. Also, she's...not the sharpest knife in the drawer. Meaning while she certainly isn't an idiot, she is no Twilight Sparkle," said Wizard.

"Don't try and work yer fancy mathematics on me!"

Fluttershy

+Bearer of the Element of Kindness

+The Stare gives her an advantage over some foes

+Can manipulate the weather

+Becomes faster and stronger when determined or angry

-Is an absolute coward

-Not a very good flier unless motivated

"Fluttershy was a Pegasus in Cloudsdale before she literally dropped out, and made Ponyville her official home. She became an animal caretaker, and kept at it even after she became an Element bearer," began Wizard.

Flight:

+Can manipulate the weather

-Cannot fly as well as other pegasi unless provoked

The Stare:

+Instills foes with a sense of fear, making them bend to her will

-Can sometimes fail, as evidenced when Discord laughed it off

"Just like any other Pegasus, Fluttershy can use her innate magic to fly, and manipulate the weather. She also has the stare: an ability where she can make weak minded foes bend to her will," says Wizard

"But the stare can fail against strong minded, like when Discord laughed in her face when she tried to use it on him. Also, she's a complete coward, which works against her a lot of times. The only real times when she accomplishes anything is when she is motivated, or gets pissed off," said Boomstick.

"Um, I'm fluttershy."

Rarity

+The bearer of the Element of Generosity

+The most mature of the group

-More inclined to talk her way out of fights

-Can be very petty

"Ever since Rarity gained her cutie mark after designing costumes for a school play, Rarity started her work as a humble dress maker in Ponyville," began Boomstick.

Magic:

+Telekinesis

+Can conjure clothes(?)

+Can locate precious gems with her magic

-Can't do much else

"Aside from basic magical ability, there isn't much else to say about Rarity. She can locate precious gems, and stole Piccolo's clothes beam for her own use. So...onto the next pony," Boomstick said.

"This is THE. WORST. POSSIBLE THING!"

Rainbow Dash

+Fastest and most agile of the group

+Can fly at speeds up to mach 5

+Double Rainboom doubles speed

+Bearer of the Element of Loyalty

-Very Cocky and boastful

"And here is an opponent we've already seen in the arena. Introducing Rainbow Dash!" said Boomstick.

"We went over some of her abilities in the last episode, so we'll just give a review," said Wiz.

Abilities:

+Weather manipulation

+Rainnuke, which can decimate a barn

+Various other tricks

+Incredible speed

+Sonic rainboom

+Good physique

-Most tricks can only be performed in open areas

"Aside from the abilities we mentioned in Rainbow Dash vs. Starscream, she can also perform the Atomic Rainnuke, which has enough force to decimate a barn," said Boomstick.

"But even with all her speed, she's still cocky, and can't perform well in closed spaces," said Wiz.

"See? 10 seconds flat."

Pinkie Pie

+Bearer of the Element of Laughter

-Can sometimes go off the deep end

"And last but not least we have Pinkie Pie: Ponyville's premier party pony," said Wiz.

"Try saying that ten times fast!" quipped Boomstick.

"Pinkie is...odd. She can break the fourth wall, move at super speed, grab things with her mane, dig tunnels underground in a matter of seconds, pull a cannon out of nowhere, and has a Pinkie sense," said Wiz.

Abilities:

+Pinkie sense allows her to dodge attacks

+Party cannon launches a literal party at opponents

+Can apparently break the laws of physics at times

-Goes off the deep end at times

-Just like spider sense, Pinkie sense can be outdone

"But all her craziness comes at a price: and that is going crazy herself. If something bad happens that involves her friends, she enters a depressed state that the fans refer to as Pinkamena," said Boomstick.

"You know what this deserves? A PARTY!"

The power of Teamwork. DEATH BATTLE

None of these characters or items belong to me. All properties are owned by Hasbro, VALVE, and Screwattack! Music belongs to VALVE.

"Alright, the combatants are set, it's time to end this debate once and for all," said Wiz.

"It's time for a DEATH BATTLE!" shouted Boomstick.

Location: Doomsday Map.

Time: 4:58 PM

The RED team was bored. No attacks had come from BLU today, and they were wondering what was up. Although they were wary, they still enjoyed their day of rest.

Sniper was polishing his rifle, Spy was smoking a cigarette, Medic and Heavy were playing chess, Engineer and Pyro were hanging out, Demoman was drinking his scrumpy, Soldier was admiring his collection of hats, and Scout was tossing his baseball around.

Suddenly, their peace was interrupted by sirens accompanied by a loud voice.

"ALERT! AN UNKNOWN TEAM HAS ENTERED THE AREA!" The announcer said.

The mercenaries sprang to their feet, getting their weapons of choice and running outside to stop whatever had interrupted them.

.  .  .

Twilight and the others looked around, confused about their current location. One minute they had been having a little get together, and now they were in a strange place that they had never seen before.

"Twilight, where are we?" Rainbow Dash asked.

"I'm not sure, I've never seen this place before," Twilight responded.

"Do ya think Discord sent us here Fluttershy?" Applejack asked the timid Pegasus.

"I don't think so, he would have let us know he was here if-" Fluttershy said.

Fluttershy was cut off by a loud bang.

"Eep!" she exclaimed. The group of mares looked at where the noise came from and saw the nine mercenaries.

"HALT!" Soldier shouted.

"Uh...What the hell are those things?" Scout asked. "And how did they get here?"

"What are little horses doing at Doomsday?" Heavy yelled at the mane 6.

"Um, we're very sorry sirs, we don't know how we got here, if you'd just show us the way out-" Twilight began.

"I DON'T THINK SO MAGGOTS!" Soldier yelled back. "THIS PLACE IS A RESTRICTED AREA, IF YOU SOMEHOW GOT IN HERE, THEN YOU MUST BE WORKING FOR BLU!"

"What? N-No, what are you talking about?" Twilight asked.

"Da, the horses might be creations of Blutarch," Medic said, completely ignoring Twilight's words.

"Why would Blu send wimpy little horses to fight us? I mean, look at them! They look absolutely pathetic!" Scout said.

"HEY! Who are you calling pathetic?!" Rainbow Dash called out. "If it's a fight you want, then we'll be happy to give it to you!"

"Okay men, let's kill these freaks so I can go back to my hat collection!" Soldier said, pulling out his Rocket Launcher.

"If this is the way you want to settle this, then so be it," Twilight said as she and the others got into fighting stances.

"LET'S DO IT!" Demoman yelled as he took one final gulp of his scrumpy before tossing the empty bottle to the side.

The two groups faced each other, ready for the fight of their lives. Only one group would come out of this alive.

RED Team: 9

Mane Six: 6

FIGHT!

Scout pulled out the Force-a-Nature and ran towards the group of ponies. he double jumped and aimed at Rainbow Dash. Unfortunately for Scout, Rainbow had other plans. In a blur of speed she rammed Scout into the ground.

Scout groaned in pain and looked at the cyan Pegasus in fear. Not only did her hair make him feel like he wanted to cry, but she was even faster than him. HIM!

'I better turn the tables or I'm doomed," Scout thought as he switched to the Sandman.

"Hah! Who's pathetic-" Rainbow began before being whacked upside the head by Scout's wooden baseball bat. "Ow...my head."

While Rainbow Dash shook the cobwebs out of her head, Scout whipped out his Bonk! Atomic Punch and took a sip. The effects were immediate, and Scout was surrounded by a blurry energy. He took off in the direction of the sewer tunnel as Rainbow regained her senses.

"Oh no you don't!" she shouted as she took off after Scout. She kept on bucking him, but it didn't seem to affect him, and the quick human taunted her every time she tried.

"That didn't hurt!"

"Better luck next time!"

"I'm not even winded!"

"SHUT UP!" Rainbow Dash screamed as she attempted to sucker punch him, only for it to fail once again.

The effects of the Atomic Punch wore off, and Scout immediately whacked her with his baseball bat. As she tried to shake off the pain, Scout pulled out a baseball and threw it up in the air.

*CRACK!*

The baseball soared at Rainbow Dash...only for her to dodge.

"Ah crap," Scout said, pulling out the Force-a-nature.

Rainbow smirked, and in a second, she was behind him. She pulled her legs back and gave a vicious buck.

RED Team: 8

.  .  .

After Scout and Rainbow Dash had gone into the tunnels, the rest of the group had also begun fighting. Heavy revved his mini-gun, Demoman shot several grenades, and Soldier fired a rocket.

"Scatter!" Twilight shouted, taking flight. Fluttershy took flight, Pinkie zoomed away at speeds that astounded the humans, Applejack sprinted away from the explosions, and Rarity ran away, not wanting to get any dirt in her mane.

"Move out men!" Soldier shouted, running out into the battlefield. Pyro and Demoman made their way to where the rocket would be, Sniper ran off to find a proper place to snipe, Medic used his Medigun on Heavy, following him out into the battlefield, Spy cloaked and ran out to do what he does best, and Engineer stayed behind.

Engi pulled a large toolbox out of nowhere and set it down.

"Sentry goin up."

.  .  .

Rainbow Dash flew out of the tunnel, looking around for her friends. She noticed Soldier running ahead, and decided she'd take care of him.

"Heh, this'll be easy," she said to herself as she zoomed after him, ramming him in the back.

Soldier got up, shaking off the pain as he glared at the Pegasus.

"Maggot!" he shouted, aiming his rocket launcher at his feet. Rainbow watched as Soldier seemingly blow himself up.

"Heh, what a-"

CRITICAL HIT!

Rainbow Dash was interrupted from her taunting by a hit from the Market Gardener, scoring a critical hit on her. She looked up only for Soldier to hit her with his shovel again. He switched to his rocket launcher and gave a vicious smile.

"This is what happens when you take on a veteran of war!" Soldier yelled. Rainbow came to her senses and flew away from the incoming rocket, avoiding most of the explosion. Soldier switched to his shotgun and tried shooting her out of the sky. Rainbow dodged the shots from the warmonger's secondary and took to the sky. She came back with a black storm cloud and positioned it above Soldier.

Soldier switched back to his Rocket launcher and rocket jumped, tearing through the cloud and causing it to dissipate. Rainbow Dash bucked anyway, hitting Soldier square in the chest. Soldier switched to the Market Gardener and bashed her outstretched leg.

CRITICAL HIT!

Rainbow yelped in pain, her back left leg now broken. Her pain turned into anger, and she turned to face Soldier, ready to give him a taste of his own medicine.

Soldier rocket jumped again, but she was ready this time. She dodged a swing from the Market Gardener and bucked the shovel out of Soldier's grip, and then flew around Soldier as fast as she could, creating a small tornado.

Inside of the vortex, Soldier growled. 'If I'm going to die, then I will take this girly horse with me!' He pulled the pins from the grenades on his chest and shouted, "FOR AMERICA!"

They both exploded into a bloody mess.

RED Team: 7

Mane Six: 5

.  .  .

Heavy and Medic looked up, seeing body parts raining from the sky.

"Looks like Soldier took care of one of the ponies," Heavy said.

"It seems- GAH!" Medic yelled as a ruby embedded itself into his side.

"Doctor!" Heavy yelled, concerned for the wellbeing of his friend. Before he cried out as and emerald was embedded into his left arm.

"You brutes killed Rainbow Dash!" Rarity said to the duo, using her magic to pull several more gems out of the ground.

"And we're gonna avenge her!" Applejack added, pulling Natacha out of Heavy's hands.

Medic growled and activated his Medigun, healing Heavy's injury. Heavy put up his dukes, ready for a brawl.

"Let us wrestle little horse!" Heavy said.

Applejack snorted and pawed the ground with her hoof, Rarity pulled even more gems out of the ground. Applejack charged the large Russian man, letting out a loud bellow of rage. Heavy ran at her as well, meeting her half-way. He threw a punch, but Applejack rolled out of the way and delivered a buck to his arm. Heavy threw another punch, successfully hitting her this time, then followed up with an uppercut.

CRITICAL HIT!

Rarity began launching all of the gems at Heavy, but with Medic there to heal his injuries Rarity wasn't able to do any real damage. She began to pull more gems out of the ground, but a shot rang out, and a hole formed in Rarity's head.

"Thanks for standing still Wanker!" Sniper yelled out as he reloaded his rifle.

Mane Six: 4

"RARITY!" Applejack yelled, horrified that another one of her friends had fallen. Heavy used this distraction to deliver another punch. Medic pulled out the Ubersaw and ran at the vunerable earth pony, stabbing her twice.

Mane Six: 3

Sniper looked around for the remaining three ponies when he found himself surrounded in a magenta glow.

"What the bloody-?" Sniper said before he spontaneously burst into flames. He screamed for a while before falling to the ground.

RED Team: 6

Twilight teleported in front of Heavy, catching the Russian man off guard.

"You killed my friends," she growled. "Now, I'm going to return the favor ." She lit her horn up, preparing to blast her friends' murderers to kingdom come.

.  .  .

Pyro and Demoman had been scouring the map, looking for any sign of the ponies that their teammates hadn't already killed, but hadn't found any sign of them. They had returned to the place where the rocket would normally be and saw Heavy firing his mini-gun at the purple one, who was protecting himself with some kind of force field.

Demoman pulled out his stickybomb launcher, while Pyro pulled out the Scorch Shot, and prepared to fight yet another supernatural being. Suddenly, the ground opened up behind the two. Pinkie jumped out of the hole and put the barrel of the party cannon up to the back of the drunk man's head, blowing it clean off.

RED Team: 5

.  .  .

Fluttershy was curled up in a tiny ball inside the rocky passageways, waiting for the fight to be over. She had heard a lot of loud noises outside, but was confident that her friends could take care of themselves.

She heard a strange noise behind her that sounded somewhat like Twilight's teleportation.

"T-Twi?" she squeaked out. Fluttershy felt a searing pain in her back and collapsed, the last thing she saw being Spy chuckling to himself as he pulled his knife out of her back.

Mane Six: 2

.  .  .

Pinkie jumped over another shot from Pyro's flare gun before using her pinkie sense to avoid the flamethrower. She bucked him in the back and ran to avoid the flames when the masked pyromaniac turned around.

Pinkie ground her teeth together, delivering another buck to his already hurting back. Her mane and tail were now completely flat, her coat of fur a duller shade of pink.

"I'm going to kill you!" Pinkie said as she kicked him in the head.

(Meanwhile in Pyroland...)

Pyro laughed gleefully as he attempted to cover the smiling pink pony with his rainbows. He chuckled as the pony playfully tapped him on the head, continuing to avoid his rainbows. While he was enjoying the game it and the pony were playing, he was getting slightly frustrated that this pony wouldn't let him bathe her in his happiness.

The pony pulled out a water pistol and tried to squirt him, he giggled and began playing her game, dodging the water.

(Back in reality...)

Pinkie growled in frustration as Pyro dodged the party cannon's blasts, chuckling while he did.

As Pyro kept dodging, he noticed Engineer was building a Sentry where the wooden platform met the rocky ground. He flipped a switch on his flamethrower and shot an airblast at Pinkie.

She soared in front of the level three sentry as it finished building.

*BE-BEEP whirr* The sentry pumped Pinkie full of lead before the missiles blew the body up.

Mane Six: 1

"Pinkie!" Twilight yelled. She glared at Engineer and teleported directly behind him and creating a force field. The Sentry spun around and did to Engineer what it did to Pinkie.

RED Team: 4

Twilight used her telekinesis to pick the sentry up and crush it.

Pyro saw Twilight kill Engineer and grunted in anger. "Hudda HUD!"

(In Pyroland...)

Pyro saw a purple Alicorn bullying the Engineer and grunted, he would not allow bullying in Pyroland. He pulled out his bubbles, maybe some bubbles would get her to stop bullying his friend.

(Back In Reality...)

Pyro fired at Twilight with his Scorch Shot. Twilight teleported out of the way, and then shot a magical beam directly through Pyro's body.

"hudda..." Pyro said as he collapsed.

RED Team: 3

"I am fully charged!" Medic yelled. Causing Twilight to turn around.

"You're next!" Twilight yelled, some of the of the hairs on her mane standing up. She ripped Natacha out of Heavy's hands and tossed it out of reach.

"Now Doctor!" Heavy yelled as he put up his fists. Twilight charged up her magic as Medic flipped a switch on his medigun. Twilight fired her strongest blast at the same time Medic activated the ubercharge.

Heavy and Medic were pushed back by the sheer force behind the magic, but no damage was dealt due to them being invincible.

"C'mon..." Twilight growled as she put all her effort into her magic. The beam of magic ceased as a splitting pain filled her head. "AHHHH!" Twilight yelled as blood trickled down her face. She glanced up, and saw that her horn had broken apart. Twilight glanced back to see Spy smirking at her, the Ambassador in his hands.

She looked back at Heavy to see that the ubercharge had wore off, and that he was approaching her with a giant smile. Twilight closed her eyes as Heavy performed the Showdown taunt.

"Pinkie, Rainbow Dash, Rarity, Fluttershy, Applejack, I'm so sorry," she whispered as Heavy said the final word she would ever hear in this life.

"Pow!" Heavy said as he pointed his finger gun at her, sending the Alicorn princess flying.

Mane Six: 0

"Spy is credit to team!" Heavy exclaimed.

"Thank you, my friend. The outcome never really was in any doubt," Spy said. "Come, the rest of the team has probably respawned already."

The three mercenaries made their way to where their teammates were waiting. Heavy pulled out his Sandvich and began to eat.

"Om nom, Om nom nom nom. Heh, Sandvich," Heavy bellowed as he retrieved Natacha.

K.O.!

Youtube Video

"Oh man! That ending was brutal!" Boomstick said.

"This fight was very close. While the Mane Six held the durability and speed advantage, the ponies have no resistance against the mercenaries' weapons and taunt kills. But on the other hand, their weather manipulation, magic, and all the stuff Pinkie can do gave them an edge. In the end, the Mane Six most likely wouldn't be able to counter the weapons and skills that the RED team has," Wiz explained.

"To start off, Rarity and Fluttershy were doomed from the start. Since Rarity needs time to perform her magic and Fluttershy is a timid coward, both of them are easy pickings for Sniper and Spy. Even if Fluttershy gets better when she's angry, she would most likely be killed before that could happen. And even if Fluttershy used the stare on them, it probably wouldn't work. The only things it did work on were animals, which was shown when Discord laughed when she tried it on him. So I doubt something like that would work on a cold blooded killer," said Boomstick.

"Applejack wouldn't last long against any of the mercs, because even though her kicks can shake trees, these people can take grenades and rockets at point-blank! Her lasso would only delay the inevitable, especially if they are in pairs. Rainbow Dash may have abilities that could end the fight, but her cocky attitude and mindset that humans are much weaker than she would likely get her killed before she would go all out, and would likely be caught off-guard by the seemingly harmless taunt kills," said Wiz.

"While Pinkie's strange abilities give her an advantage, the sight of her friends dying would likely send her into her depressed/crazy state, which would make it harder to focus, making her more prone to being caught off guard. Also, never in the show has it been shown that Pinkie's Pinkie sense can allow her to dodge bullets. And finally, Twilight may be the most powerful of the group, but she would likely turn into crazy Twilight after seeing her friends die; making her less likely to think rationally. Twilight is also an easy target for Sniper, Spy, and even rocket jumping," said Boomstick.

RED TEAM:

+Advantage in numbers

+Weapons can easily wound and kill the ponies

+More combat experience

+Have battled flying/magical opponents in the past

+Work better as a team

-Less durable than the ponies

-Not as fast as the ponies

Mane Six:

+More durable

+Faster

+Magic and flight gives them variety and a mobility advantage

-Less numbers

-Don't work as well as a team

-Have no counter for ubercharge

-Would not expect some of the more bizarre attacks such as the taunt kills or dead ringer

"In the end, the RED Team pwned those ponies," Boomstick quipped.

"The winner is the RED Team."

A Dream vs. A Nightmare

Disclaimer: None of these characters belong to me. All properties belong to Hasbro, Wes Craven, and Screwattack!

"Dreams. A realm in which anything is possible," Wiz begins.

"And today, two characters who can manipulate the dreams of others will be entering the arena," Boomstick said.

"Princess Luna, ruler of the night."

"And Freddy Krueger, the Springwood Slasher."

"He's Wiz and I'm Boomstick,"

"... And it's our job to analyze their weapons, armor, and skills to find out who would win a Death Battle!"

Luna:

+Alicorn Princess

+Has Lived for thousands of years

+Incredible magical and physical strength

+Can control dreams

-Excessive dream magic can put intense strain on her

"One thousand years ago, two Alicorn sisters ruled over Equestria. Celestia ruled over the day, while Luna ruled over the night," Wiz started.

"But Luna became jealous of her sister and turned into Nightmare Moon, trying to overthrow Celestia and plunge the planet into eternal night. So her sister used the Elements of Harmony and sent Luna's ass to the moon for one thousand years. After she escaped, she was cleansed by the new Element Bearers and turned back into Princess Luna," said Boomstick.

"Once she regained her strength and apologized to her sister, Luna went back to her duty of protecting Equestrian citizens from nightmares."

Abilities:

+Magical telekinesis, teleportation, force fields, beams, blasts, spells, flight, weather manipulation, and dream walking

+Thousands of years of experience

+Strong enough to crack the ground

+Royal Canterlot Voice

+Control over dreams

+Can see into the past and future of dreamers

-Can lose control over dreams if the opponent's strength is on par with hers (Tantabus)

-While immense, her magic is limited

"Luna's magical strength is incredible, even rivaling that of Celestia's. And inside the world of dreams she can take complete control and even create joined dreams."

"The Royal Canterlot Voice can render opponents deaf, she can crack stone without even trying, and can use her mind to look into the past and future of dreamers. In dreams, she's practically invincible!"

"Well, no. Even though her strength is impressive, she still has a limit on her magic, and excessive dream linking has tired her out before. She also lost control of the Tantabus, an entity which she created, which means opponents similar to her can overpower her in a dream."

"Regardless, this is one pony who you don't want to piss off."

"Do your worst."

Freddy Krueger:

+Serial killer

+Impressive fighter

+Creative killer

+Can manipulate dreams and kill dreamers

-Cocky, likes to toy with his victims before killing

-Can only grow stronger with the power of his victim's souls and fear

-Minor fear of fire

-Says "bitch" a lot

"Freddy Krueger was born to Amanda Krueger after she was raped by one hundred inmates of an insane asylum. When he reached adulthood, Freddy created the iconic bladed glove as a weapon of murder."

"But after getting off the hook due to an error in the justice system, the parents of the victims burned down Freddy's house, with him still inside. But before he died, he struck a deal with three dream demons to become their agent, and was granted immortality."

"Ever since then, Freddy has gleefully tormented and killed the children of Elm Street."

Abilities:

+Bladed glove

+Complete control over dreams

+Possession

+Above average durability and fighting prowess in the real world

+Has yet to be permanently killed

+Expert at figuring out the fears of others

-Vulnerable in the real world

MK9 Moves:

+Teleportation

+Freddy Fingers (sends a duplicate of his glove flying at his opponent)

+X-ray (cracks ribs and skull)

+Hell Spike (four large blades erupt from the ground)

+Sweet dreams (dazes opponent momentarily)

+Fatalities: Welcome to my Nightmare. Tell 'em Freddy sent ya.

"In the dream realm, Freddy has complete control, killing lucid dreamers without breaking a sweat."

"And since Freddy's a prick, he can possess others and use them as his puppets in the real world. He can easily figure out an opponent's fears and is happy to exploit them, and he even participated in a Mortal Kombat tournament."

"But he is not unstoppable. He can be dragged into the real world where he is vulnerable, which is how he has been defeated several times in the movies. He was also defeated by Jason Voorhees in the real world, but only because of outside intervention."

"Not to mention that he loves toying with his opponents, which can give them the time they need to escape. But this prick STILL hasn't been permanently killed off, even though he lost the dream demons!"

"Welcome to my Nightmare."

"Alright, the combatants are set, it's time to end this debate once and for all."

"It's time for a DEATH BATTLE!!!"

Dear Princess Celestia,

Something's wrong with Sweetie Belle! She keeps tossing and turning and screaming, and she won't wake up no matter how hard we try! Random cuts keep appearing on her body, please help! Send Princess Luna!

From, Twilight Sparkle and Spike the Dragon.

Luna read over the letter that her sister had handed her, and quickly got to her hooves. She would not let anypony hurt the young unicorn she had befriended! In a flash she had teleported into the Carousel Boutique, the home of Sweetie Belle's sister. Rarity, Spike, and Twilight tore their eyes away from the thrashing Sweetie Belle to look at the newly-arrived Princess of the Night.

"Oh thank goodness! Please help my sister Princess Luna!" Rarity said through her tears.

"Do not worry Element of Generosity, I will rid your sister of whatever ails her," Luna said. She charged up her magic and prepared to enter Sweetie's dreams.

"Good luck Princess. ...Please help her," said Spike, who was staring at Sweetie with concern evident in his eyes.

Luna looked at Sweetie and then back to Spike. She gave him a knowing smile. "Don't worry young Spike, I'll save your friend." She turned back to Sweetie and fired a white strand of magic at her head, entering the young unicorn's dreams.

In the dream realm...

Luna found herself in some kind of boiler room, full of hissing metal pipes that gave off small amounts of steam. She heard a scream of terror coming from just around the corner.

She bolted in the direction of her friend, and found the source of the problem.

A man wearing a striped sweater and fedora, his face horribly burnt, was holding the sobbing filly by her neck with his free hand, while holding a bladed glove right at her throat.

"It's been fun squirt, but I'm afraid it's time to-GAH!" Freddy was blasted into a wall by a blast of magic, courtesy of one very ticked-off Luna.

"Princess Luna!" Sweetie called out in relief, running over to give a hug of gratitude to her savior. "Thank goodness, I was certain he was going to...going to-!"

"Shh. Don't worry young one, you're safe now," Luna cooed, wrapping her wings around the filly.

"Safe? HAHAHAHAHA!" Freddy's laugh echoed through the boiler room, causing Sweetie Belle to grasp Luna tightly. "You're never safe in my world." The Springwood slasher walked out of the shadows and gave Luna a chilling grin.

The Princess of the Night narrowed her eyes at the serial killer, fully prepared to destroy him. "As Princess of the Night, I command you to torment this filly no longer. Be gone, demon!"

"Oh, so scary! HAHAHAHA!" Freddy cackled, infuriating Luna further.

"He didn't disappear. Looks like I'll have to deal with this demon myself," Luna thought. She lowered Sweetie Belle down to the floor. "Go and have your wounds treated, I'll deal with your tormentor." She lit up her horn and touched it to Sweetie's forehead, causing her to wake up.

Freddy snarled. "She was my prey!"

Luna gave him a glare that would cause any normal man to shake in fear. "You will not refer to my little ponies as your prey! In the name of Equestria, we shall purge you from the dream realm!"

Freddy was not intimidated in the slightest, he was actually amused by the Princess's threat. "Oh! I'm shaking in my boots!" Freddy said with a laugh. "Listen up bitch, this is my world. If you think I'm going to be defeated by some two-bit horse princess, then think again bitch!"

Luna growled menacingly, charging up her horn in preparation to blast Freddy into oblivion.

Freddy grinned, running his claws along the metal wall beside him.

FIGHT!

Luna took to the air with a flap of her wings and sent a blast of green energy at the dream demon. Freddy yawned and stepped to the side, letting the beam pass by him.

Luna shot another blast at him, hitting his gloved arm, severing the limb from his body.

"No! Not my arm!" Freddy yelled.

Luna followed up with another blast that took his other arm off.

Freddy fell to the ground, screaming overdramatically as he writhed on the floor.

"Hmph, where is your confidence now?" Luna said, believing she had won. She landed in front of him, prepared to finish the fight.

Freddy stopped yelling and got to his feet, grinning like the madman he was. In a flash, his limbs regenerated, sweater and all. Luna barely had time to gape before he delivered a hard right hook to her jaw, knocking her back a few feet.

"Welcome to my nightmare," he whispered.

Luna charged another blast, but Freddy was having none of that. He thrust his hand out, sending the Alicorn flying into some of the pipes, which promptly broke. Before Luna could recover, Freddy had lifted her up in his telekinetic grasp and slammed her into a wall. He then slammed her into the ceiling. He continued to throw her around like a ragdoll, relishing in her grunts of pain.

Luna teleported in front of Freddy, her eyes glowing white with power. "Enough! I refuse to be subjected to your-!" Luna was never able to finish her sentence on account of the large boiler fell on top of her.

"Thanks for the laughs bitch, but It's time for me to pay another visit to that cute little unicorn." Freddy began to walk away, but didn't get far on account of the large boiler being thrown at him.

Freddy got to his feet and turned around, seeing an enraged Luna now sporting dark blue armor. "You will not leave this dream alive!" She conjured up a double-edged sword. "En Guard!"

She shot forward and swung her sword, cleaving him in half. Luna didn't stop there, and swung her sword at blinding speed, cutting Krueger to pieces.

The pieces rose from the floor and reformed into an annoyed Freddy Krueger.

"Why you-!" Luna impaled him through his chest and threw him into one of the walls, pinning him there. She shot a large wave of magic at him, incinerating both him and the sword.

Luna didn't let her guard down, poised to strike if he were to re-appear. As expected, Krueger appeared behind her in a plume of fire. He raised his bladed glove in preparation to strike. Luna lashed out with a viscous buck to his stomach, sending him flying into the opposite wall.

Luna turned to face Freddy as he got to his feet, his grin replaced with a deep scowl.

"That actually hurt. Lucid dreamer, huh?" Freddy said, his smile reappearing in all its dark glory. "You wouldn't be the first."

Luna shot a burst of magic at him, but Freddy pulled a handheld mirror from behind his back and deflected the blast back at her. It hit her square in the face, dazing her for a short moment.

Freddy took advantage of this brief distraction and teleported directly in front of her. He swung his glove in an upward slash, cutting a large cut into her cheek. Freddy thrust his claws into her chest, piercing the armor and breaking some of her ribs, he followed up with another slash at her face, cracking her jaw and sending her flying.

Luna fought through the pain and spread her wings, stopping her descent to the floor. Freddy jumped closer to her. His glove was surrounded by a sickly green glow as he swung it downward, summoning a green blob of magic that hit her head, dazing her. He took this second opportunity to grab her shoulders.

He lifted one of his blades up to his mouth. "Shh." Freddy spun her around and drove his blades into her back, causing her to yell in pain. Freddy hefted her up and threw her to the side like a ragdoll.

"Hehe. Aw, does it hurt? Don't worry, you won't be hurting for much longer," Freddy taunted. "When you get to hell, tell em' Freddy sent ya, bitch."

He raised his hand, causing a large furnace to come out of the ground. The door opened by itself, revealing the intense flames inside. Freddy stabbed her and threw her into the furnace. Luna screamed in pain as the flames ate away at her skin. Freddy waved at her with his bladed glove, as if he was saying goodbye. She tried to stumble out of the furnace, only for Freddy to slam the metal door in her face.

Freddy thrust his hands up in victory, but yelled in pain as something pierced his shoulder. Freddy turned to see a pony-bat hybrid digging its teeth into his burnt skin. Soon, another bit down on his other shoulder, two more clamped down on his legs, three got his arms, and the final one bit his neck. To top it off, one more thestral guard appeared behind him and impaled him with a spear.

The furnace exploded, revealing a fully healed Luna. She examined her work as Freddy let out a scream of pain and rage.

"I am no mere lucid dreamer. I control the dream realm. Here, I am a goddess! You may have caught me by surprise demon, but now I will send you to Tarturus where you belong!" Luna said, preparing another spell.

Freddy teleported out of the thestrals' grasp. He snapped his fingers, and a hole in the ground opened up underneath the hybrids. Before they could fly out of it, the hole closed up, swallowing Luna's backup.

Freddy had just looked up when a blast of magic tore through his chest. He merely looked annoyed as the wound closed up instantly.

"You call that power? HAH! You are nothing compared to me," Freddy said, scraping his blades along the wall.

"I have yet to see proof of that, demon," Luna said. "But I am a goddess here! I can see into your past, I can know in an instant how to kill you!" She charged up her magic... but nothing happened.

"What!? I cannot read you!" Luna exclaimed.

"HAHAHAHAHA! Nice try Luna, but you don't scare me!" Freddy snapped his fingers and the two of them appeared in the Canterlot throne room.

"Wha-? How do you-?!"

"Resist?" Freddy finished for her. "I control this realm. But I find it funny that you call yourself a goddess when you can't even save a few fillies, Princess Luna."

Luna growled in fury. "We've had it with thee Krueger, now you shall-!"

"Or should I call you Nightmare Moon?"

Luna froze, her eyes widening at the mention of her evil self.

Freddy's smile widened to unnatural proportions. "Did you ever realize that eternal night would wipe out all life on the planet? Did you know that, or were you just stupid?"

"SHUT YOUR MOUTH!" Luna shouted in her Royal Canterlot Voice. She fired an intense wave of raw magical energy at Freddy, completely destroying the section of the floor he had been standing on.

"You say you're redeemed, that you're a new pony, but you can never erase your past," said a voice that was very familiar to Luna.

Luna turned around slowly, coming face to face with the sharp-toothed smile of Nightmare Moon. "B-But, you're dead! The elements purged you from my body!"

"As I said Luna, you cannot erase who you once were." Nightmare Moon blasted Luna with her magic, sending her crashing through the wall, back into the boiler room.

She got to her hooves and looked up, seeing that the hole she had formed to get to the boiler room was gone.

"Luna..." A raspy voice said from behind her. Luna spun around and nearly vomited at what she saw. The bodies of Applebloom and Scootaloo were hanging from  barb-wired rope that wrapped around their necks. Their eyes were gone, replaced with pitch black voids which leaked tears. Their bodies were ripped open, giving her a perfect view of the fillies' intestines, and a small trickle of blood came out of their mouths.

"Why didn't you save us Luna..? Why did you let him kill us..?" the body of Scootaloo whispered.

"No..." Luna muttered, backing away from the talking corpses.

"Because of you, we're dead. And once he kills you, Sweetie Belle will join us too," Applebloom wheezed.

"No...No!" Luna exclaimed, tears pouring out of her eyes.

"One, two, Freddy's coming for you..." Applebloom and Scootaloo sang in unison.

"Three, four, better lock your door..." sang another group of familiar voices behind her. She spun around to see the corpses of the Mane Six in the same state as Applebloom and Scootaloo.

"No...please no," Luna whimpered.

"Five, six, grab your crucifix..." sang the butchered and bloodied bodies of Spike and Pipsqueak from her left.

"Stop...PLEASE!" she pleaded.

"Seven, eight, gonna stay up late..." sang the decapitated head of Sweetie Belle to her right.

"STOP IT!" Luna screamed desperately.

"Nine, ten, never sleep again," they all sang in unison.

Luna shut her eyes tightly and sobbed as she pressed her hooves against her ears to keep from hearing that horrible song. All was silent for a while, and she cautiously opened her eyes.

...To see she was now on the surface of the moon.

By this point, she was so afraid and frantic that the thought of trying to manipulate the dream never even occurred to her. As far as she was concerned, this was no longer a dream...

...this was Hell.

"H-Hello?" she called out, receiving no response to her cries. "IS ANYONE THERE?!" Luna shouted in her Royal Canterlot Voice.

"Luna." The Princess of the Night froze once more, before she hesitantly turned around to look her elder sister in the face.

"I'm disappointed in you sister," Celestia said with a frown, her sharp gaze piercing through whatever willpower Luna still had. "You betrayed me, tried to kill me twice, almost destroyed the kingdom a second time after you returned, frightened an entire town because you were out of touch with the times, slept while Canterlot was attacked by changelings, and couldn't even save a few ponies in the very realm you claim to control."

"Sister..." Luna sobbed, trying with all her might to not cry a second time.

"And because of your incompetence...you couldn't save me either," Celestia finished.

Luna was about to ask what her sister meant before Celestia's head fell off of her body, her neck shooting fountains of blood out of it. She screamed a hellish scream filled with grief as her sister's body spontaneously burst into flames.

"You really are pathetic Luna," the voice of Freddy Krueger echoed from all sides. "It would be better if you died, no one will miss you, you have nothing left to live for."

Luna felt anger well up inside her upon hearing the voice of the Springwood Slasher. "KRUEGER!!!"

"Well it ain't Dr. Seuss," Freddy said from behind her. She spun around and received a powerful uppercut that launched her high into the air. Freddy jumped up to the Alicorn's body and dug his blades into her back, swung her around, and threw her at Equestria, which was directly in front of them.

Luna shot through the atmosphere and hurtled towards the ground at speeds that would make Rainbow Dash jealous. She tried to spread her wings to slow her descent, but the speed was so great that it did nothing.

Right before she hit the ground, Freddy dressed up as a professional baseball player hit her in the side of the head with a baseball bat, sending her hurtling into a scoreboard, electrocuting her with more electricity than an actual scoreboard would.

"Another amazing home run hit by MDB Champion Freddy Krueger!" Freddy's voice announced over the loudspeaker. The stadium full of Freddy duplicates applauded loudly as baseball Freddy bowed at the audience.

"ENOUGH GAMES!!!" Luna yelled in the Royal Canterlot Voice, destroying the scoreboard with her telekinesis. She shot a beam of magic at Freddy that was so intense that it would disintegrate anything it touched. After that, she lifted the remains of the scoreboard up with her telekinesis and threw it at the crater she had made. She followed up by lifting the entire stadium out of the ground and throwing it on top of the scoreboard.

Luna heard the sound of slow clapping behind her and turned around to see Freddy wearing that same repulsive smile.

"Looks like the bitch still has some fight left in her," Freddy taunted. "But it doesn't matter, you've given me enough power to kill you. While this has been fun, I would really like to collect a few more souls before the sun comes up."

"Do not act like you are invincible, demon. It is true that you have exhibited powers beyond even mine, but that still doesn't change that all I have to do..." Luna said.

Deciding that he would have to end the fight now, he willed his blades to grow to the length of swords and jumped at Luna, intending to add her soul to his collection.

At the last second, Luna teleported behind Freddy and grabbed him.

"...Is to wake up," Luna finished, pulling Freddy into the real world with her.

In the Real World...

Luna and Freddy tumbled out of the bed Luna had previously been laying on.

"Shit!" Freddy muttered as he got to his feet.

"You may be more powerful in the Dream Realm, but you are weak in the real world," Luna said, lifting Freddy off the ground with her telekinesis.

Even faced with the possibility of death, Freddy still smirked. "I think you'll find I'm anything but weak, bitch." Luna prepared to rip him apart, but Freddy disappeared in a burst of fire before she could.

"What?! I thought he was powerless!" Luna thought, frantically looking around for her opponent.

Freddy appeared a short distance behind her, taunting her with, "Over here asshole!"

Luna turned around in a flash and shot a highly potent spell at him, but Freddy had already disappeared. He reappeared a few yards away from her and jammed his blades into the ground. Four large blades shot out of the ground underneath Luna, cutting large cuts into her legs.

Luna yelled out in agony and took to the air, barely avoiding the same attack again.

Freddy thrust his gloved hand at her, sending a copy of his signature weapon flying at her. Luna grabbed the copy in her telekinesis and threw it back at Krueger, but he had vanished once again.

He reappeared under her. He thrust his bladed glove downward, surrounding it in a sickly green glow. A green blob of magic came down from the sky and hit Luna on the head. While she was sill dazed, Freddy sent two copies of his glove flying at her and jumped up to get a few attacks on her as well. As Luna recovered, he teleported once more.

Luna was furious, she would not stand for Freddy's cheap tricks. When Freddy reappeared to hit her with another ranged attack, she grabbed him in her telekinesis and slammed him on the floor over, and over, and over until the floor broke.

Luna teleported to the first floor of the Carousel Boutique without wasting a second. She poured all of her magic into a single orb of magic.

"DIE DEMON!!!" Luna yelled as she shot the giant orb at Freddy, who screamed in pain as he was disintegrated by the attack.

Luna breathed heavily as she looked around at the damage she had caused. "What a mess we have made, I do hope miss Rarity will forgive me."

K.O.!

"Damn, that battle was awesome!" Boomstick shouted.

"Indeed. While Freddy certainly put up a good fight, Luna ultimately claimed victory. Even though neither could best the other in the dream realm, Luna easily took this fight in the real world," Wiz commented.

"Well duh! Even with his moves from MK9, Freddy was still no match for Luna's magic in the real world," said Boomstick.

"Trying to decide who had better control of the dream realm was a bit of a tossup, but this question was answered in Do Princesses Dream of Magic Sheep? In it, Luna lost control over the Tantabus, an entity that SHE created specifically to torment HER, but she ended up losing control over it after dreaming about the Mane 6. And while she might have regained control over it at the end of the episode, the fact remains that she lost control over it. While Freddy has never lost control of one of his dreams," Wiz explained.

"But Boomstick! Freddy has been defeated by teenagers! And what about Jason? He lost control of him!" Boomstick whined, imitating potential commenters.

"Well, Freddy has always been defeated because of outside circumstances. Whether it be outside help, a proper burial in the real world, or even some BS plot device. And Jason was not created by Freddy, Jason was only tricked by Freddy, while Tantabus was created by Luna. Not to mention that Luna has a whole plethora of fears for Freddy to exploit, fears that he is an expert of figuring out. Freddy could also jump from dream to dream and gain a lot of power from the fears and souls of other ponies, eventually getting more than enough power to best Luna in the realm of dreams. Also, it has never been shown that Luna could see into the past and future of beings like Freddy, so we cannot say for sure that Luna would even be able to figure out ways that Krueger has been defeated. So it's safe to say that Freddy would win if this fight stayed in the dream realm," Wiz explained.

"But Luna was likely to wise up after getting her ass kicked by Freddy for awhile, which would likely happen since Freddy would be all too eager to toy with the Alicorn Princess. Once in the real world, Luna would completely destroy Freddy," Boomstick finished.

"And if we decided to add Nightmare Moon and Tantabus to the battle, then it would only be fair to give Freddy the Dream Demons and Necronomicon: Ex Mortis, resulting in a battle that we honestly don't know the result of," Wiz said.

"In the end, Freddy could only dream of victory," Boomstick quipped.

"The winner is Princess Luna."

Luna

+More experience

+Magic and flight gives her better mobility

+More durable than Freddy in the real world

+Trumps Freddy in every way in the real world

-Can't find out Freddy's weaknesses

-Fears give Freddy power

-Slightly less control over the dream realm

Freddy

+Slightly better control over the dream realm

+Can easily exploit Luna's fears

-No chance against Luna in the real world

-Less experience

-Likes to toy with victims before killing

Next Time on DEATH BATTLE: Equestria style!

. . .

Two fighters!

No research!

MELEE!

Melee no. 1: Sombra vs. Sidious

One battle...

No research…

MELEE! MASSACRE! GO!

King Sombra sat on his throne, gloating about his victory to the so-called element bearers, the prince and princess, and the dragon that had attempted to defeat him.

“King Sombra!”

Sombra looked up from his prisoners to see two of his guards in front of him, shaking with fear.

“What is it? Out with it!” Sombra commanded.

“T-There’s something here, it’s killing every-!” The guard stopped talking as both he and his partner felt an invisible force begin to strangle them. The prisoners watched in horror while Sombra watched with mild concern as the two guards were pulled back against the far wall and strangled, and then frowned as a hooded figure dressed in a black robe walked into the throne room.

“So you are the King of this place?” the man said mockingly. “How sad, I was hoping this would be more of a challenge.” He lifted up his face to look at the dark unicorn, revealing his disfigured face.

Sombra snarled, “If you know what’s best for you, you won’t insult me. Now surrender, and I might just spare your life.”

Sidious frowned, “How unfortunate that you are attempting to deceive me.”

Sombra smirked, “So, we’re doing this the hard way then? Hmph, might as well get a little magic practice in before I execute my prisoners.”

“Your arrogance blinds you. Soon it will be I that sits on your throne.”

This oughta be a match to remember!

FIGHT!

Sombra charged up his dark magic and shot a beam of the evil energy at Sidious. In the blink of an eye, the dark lord ignited his lightsaber and blocked the deadly blast. He then began to casually walk towards his opponent.

Sombra snarled, and summoned several large crystals that came out of the ground, intending to stab Sidious. The Emperor simply ignited his other lightsaber and dodged the crystals that tried to stab him, while cutting through the rest.

Now thoroughly annoyed, Sombra readied another spell. But in the blink of an eye, Sidious stood in front of him. Before he could react, Sidious had severed his horn. And before he could even scream from the pain, Palpatine cut him into pieces at blinding speed.

K.O.!

With his opponent defeated, Sidious walked over to the terrified prisoners. They all sat there for a moment, feeling nothing but utter fear as his yellow eyes gazed into their souls.

“H-Have mercy, please!” Cadance begged, hoping beyond hope that whatever the thing was that stood before them would spare her and her friends.

Sidious was silent for a moment before he uttered a phrase that sent chills down their spines. “There is no mercy.” He then shocked them with Sith lightning, laughing gleefully as they screamed in anguish.

Once they were dead, Sidious sat on Sombra’s throne and pulled out a communicator.

“Lord Vader, how goes the attack on the capitol?” He asked.

“Very well, my master. This city shall soon fall to the Galactic Empire.” Vader responded.

“You have done well, my apprentice,” Sidious said before turning the communicator off.

This round’s winner is…

Darth Sidious!